Engaging in a comprehensive dialogue regarding the nature of the ego, we embark on a critical examination of the prevailing notions that deem the ego as an enemy to be vanquished. This simplification fails to acknowledge the ego's intricate role as a defense mechanism that emerges when one's sense of identity perceives itself as vulnerable. Our discussion posits that the goal should not be to obliterate the ego but rather to cultivate a robust sense of self that mitigates the ego's incessant need for validation. In doing so, we invite our listeners to confront the shadow aspects of their identities—those uncomfortable emotions and insecurities that often lie beneath the surface of conscious awareness. The interplay between psychology and astrology is a focal point of our exploration, as we illustrate how astrological insights can illuminate the patterns of behavior and emotional wounds that shape an individual’s life. By understanding one's astrological chart, individuals can gain valuable insights into their defense mechanisms and inherent strengths, ultimately fostering a life lived with intention rather than in reaction to external stimuli. Additionally, we scrutinize societal constructs surrounding self-worth, particularly how gender influences one's perception of value. Men often derive their self-worth from achievements, while women frequently find validation in being chosen or loved, leading to a shared psychological struggle of feeling inadequate. Our conversation emphasizes that authentic healing transcends superficial positivity, requiring a candid acknowledgment of one’s fears and insecurities. In summation, we advocate for a balanced ego—one that acknowledges its identity without the compulsion for validation or comparison to others. This healthy ego fosters a genuine understanding of oneself, enabling individuals to navigate their lives with authenticity and purpose. We challenge our audience to reflect on their identities independent of external influences, thereby confronting the profound question: 'When no one is watching, who are you?' This pivotal inquiry serves as a gateway to self-discovery, urging individuals to embark on a journey toward becoming someone they respect and value deeply.
Takeaways:
Links referenced in this episode:
Companies mentioned in this episode:
Support the mythic classroom: https://i-am-astrology-readings.captivate.fm/support
Book a Reading: https://i-am-astrology-readings.captivate.fm/book-reading
I want to start this episode with a conversation that I don't think happens enough, especially not in podcast clips, reels, or videos online, especially within the spiritual community.
Speaker A:Because if you scroll long enough, you'll hear a lot of the same messages like, let go of your ego.
Speaker A:Ego is bad.
Speaker A:Also, y', all, 444 on the clock.
Speaker A:Just be love and light.
Speaker A:Just raise your vibration and just think positive.
Speaker A:And while I understand where that comes from, I think the idea is incomplete.
Speaker A:Because some of the greatest healing a person will ever do does not come from pretending everything is love and light.
Speaker A:It comes from looking at the parts of yourself you don't want to look at.
Speaker A:Your jealousy, insecurity, fear of abandonment, need for validation, control issues, anger, sadness, patterns in relationships, even the parts of you that are not pretty.
Speaker A:The parts of you that are not, quote, unquote, spiritual.
Speaker A:Because you cannot heal a version of yourself that you refuse to look at.
Speaker A:And this is what psychology calls the shadow.
Speaker A:And in astrology, this is connected to things like the twelfth House, Pluto, Scorpio, Saturn, Chiron, and the South Node we'll get into later.
Speaker A:So when we talk about healing, real healing, deep healing, we're not just talking about positive thinking.
Speaker A:We're talking about self awareness.
Speaker A:We're talking about pattern recognition, and we're talking about emotional responsibility.
Speaker A:We're talking about understanding why you react the way you do, why you choose the people you choose, or why certain things hurt you more than others, and sometimes why you care so much about what other people think.
Speaker A:That is healing.
Speaker A:Healing is not becoming a different person.
Speaker A:It's understanding yourself so you can become more of who you actually are.
Speaker A:And that's where this conversation about ego and identity comes in.
Speaker A:Because I don't think ego isn't the enemy.
Speaker A:I think the ego is a defense mechanism that forms when your identity doesn't feel safe being itself.
Speaker A:So instead of asking, how do we kill the ego?
Speaker A:I think the better question is, why does my ego feel the need to protect me so much?
Speaker A:Because the ego is not random.
Speaker A:The ego is trying to protect your identity, your worth, your dignity, your sense of self, your belonging, and your safety.
Speaker A:So the louder the ego is, usually the more insecure the identity underneath it is.
Speaker A:So the real goal is not to destroy the ego.
Speaker A:The real goal is to build an identity that feels safe enough so that the ego doesn't have time to fight for worth all the time.
Speaker A:And this is where astrology becomes a tool for healing, not just a personality.
Speaker A:Because your chart doesn't just show up who you are.
Speaker A:It shows your patterns, your wounds, your defense mechanisms, your insecurities, your strengths, your potential and your blind spot.
Speaker A:It shows why you are the way you are.
Speaker A:And once you understand that, you can stop living on autopilot and start living on purpose.
Speaker A:The ego is your sense of self.
Speaker A:It's the part of you that says, I am, I exist, and this is me.
Speaker A:If you completely destroy your ego, you do not become enlightened.
Speaker A:You become lost.
Speaker A:And you become a person with no center, no identity, and no direction.
Speaker A:So the goal is not to destroy the ego.
Speaker A:The goal is to balance the ego.
Speaker A:Because a fragile ego says, I'm not good enough.
Speaker A:When an inflated ego says, I'm better than everyone, but both are insecure.
Speaker A:A healthy ego says, I know who I am, and I don't need to prove it and I don't need to shrink it.
Speaker A:Your rising sign is who you are rising into in this lifetime.
Speaker A:It's how you enter the world, how you handle new situations, how you handle uncertainty, your instinctive self and your survival self.
Speaker A:You're constantly rising into your rising sign and your sun sign is your purpose and what you're growing into.
Speaker A:If someone has a Gemini sun, that doesn't automatically mean they're good at communication.
Speaker A:It might mean their purpose is to learn communication, learn how to speak, how to listen, and learn how to use their voice.
Speaker A:The sun is not always what you are.
Speaker A:Sometimes it's what you're here to become.
Speaker A:So the rising sun is who you're rising into, while the sun is what you're growing into.
Speaker A:And the ego is who you think you need to be to feel accepted.
Speaker A:In ancient religious decades, texts, we talk about idolizing statues and, you know, idols, but we don't idolize statues anymore.
Speaker A:We idolize influencers, lifestyles, celebrities, relationships, money, beauty, status, and the perfect life.
Speaker A:And when you idolize something, what you're really saying is, that is better than me, that is more important than me, and that is more valuable than me.
Speaker A:Now, this is where I want to connect this to something deeper.
Speaker A:Because the idea of idolizing isn't new.
Speaker A:It's actually something that's been talked about in religious texts for a very long time, the idea of idolizing false gods.
Speaker A:And I think a lot of people misunderstand that.
Speaker A:Most people think that it just means statues or physical objects or worshiping something outside of yourself.
Speaker A:But I think the deeper meaning is psychological because I think about what happens internally when you place something outside of yourself above your own sense of self.
Speaker A:Because whether someone calls it God the universe, source, spirit, whatever word resonates, the idea is the same.
Speaker A:There is something within you that is your core, your awareness, your identity, and your sense of I am.
Speaker A:And that phrase I am is powerful because everything you believe about yourself becomes after those two words, I am not good enough, I am too much, or I am too unlovable, or I am worthy, I am growing, I am becoming.
Speaker A:So when those texts say not to idolize, I don't think it's just about what you worship externally.
Speaker A:I think it's about this.
Speaker A:The moment you put something outside or above yourself, your own I am, you disconnect from yourself, you stop listening to yourself, you start comparing yourself and you start chasing someone else's life, someone else's timeline and someone else's definition of success, love, beauty and happiness.
Speaker A:And that's where identity gets lost.
Speaker A:And that becomes a self worth issue, which in astrology is your second house.
Speaker A:Because the second house isn't just about money, it's about value.
Speaker A:And the core question of the second house is what do I believe I'm worth?
Speaker A:Because whatever you believe you are worth, you will build your entire life around that.
Speaker A:Now let's talk about men and women with ego.
Speaker A:Men are often taught that their value comes from success, status and respect.
Speaker A:So men often build ego through achievement.
Speaker A:Women are often taught that their value comes from being chosen, loved and desired.
Speaker A:So women often build ego through love and validation.
Speaker A:So when a man doesn't feel respected, his ego is hurt.
Speaker A:And when a woman doesn't feel chosen, her ego is hurt, but the wound is the same.
Speaker A:Am I enough?
Speaker A:So some men perform to feel valuable and some women over love to feel valuable.
Speaker A:But both are ego trying to protect an identity that doesn't feel secure.
Speaker A:A fragile ego says, I'm not good enough.
Speaker A:Do they like me?
Speaker A:Are they better than me?
Speaker A:An inflated ego says I'm better than everyone.
Speaker A:I don't need anyone.
Speaker A:I'm always right.
Speaker A:A fragile ego feels small.
Speaker A:An inflated ego acts big.
Speaker A:But both are insecure.
Speaker A:A healthy ego says, I know who I am, I don't need to prove it and I don't need to shrink it.
Speaker A:So maybe real healing isn't love and light all the time.
Speaker A:Maybe real healing is just being honest about where you're jealous, where you're insecure, where you're scared, where you're abandoning yourself, where you pretend to be someone you're not, or where you perform instead of existing.
Speaker A:Because the truth is this, you cannot heal a version of yourself that you refuse to look at.
Speaker A:So Maybe the goal isn't to be perfect.
Speaker A:Maybe the goal isn't to be liked by everyone.
Speaker A:Maybe the goal is just this.
Speaker A:To know who you are, to understand why you are the way you are, and to slowly become someone you respect.
Speaker A:Like I said earlier, I'm not trying to be perfect anymore.
Speaker A:I'm trying to understand myself so I can become someone I respect.
Speaker A:And I'll leave you with this.
Speaker A:When no one is watching, no one is praising you, no one is choosing you.
Speaker A:No one is validating you.
Speaker A:Who are you?
Speaker A:That's your identity.
Speaker A:And that's the person you're going to spend your whole life with.
Speaker A:I'll talk to you later.
Speaker A:Until next time.
Speaker A:As above, sew within.