2 with all lowliness and gentleness, with longsuffering, bearing with one another in love, 3 endeavoring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.
Paul. Eph. 4:2, 3. Hi, it’s Nathan, and this is Day 21 of 30 Days to a Better Marriage. Humility. Gentleness. Longsuffering. Bearing with one another. These are the ways we work toward preserving the relational bond of peace in our marriages. And . . . don’t miss it . . . this is a unity born of the Spirit, because only the Spirit can birth these tender attitudes in our hearts. Humility is not a human-born trait. We are naturally self-absorbed, self-important—and this tendency is at the heart of 100% of destructive marital conflict. Disagreeing, seeing things differently, is part of every healthy relationship—but destructive conflict is not. Conflict that results in tearing our spouse down, belittling their opinions, treating them impatiently, or being determined to win—all stem from our self-absorption. Humility stands at the head of a family of peace cultivators. It’s followed closely by gentleness and longsuffering. It lives patiently with our spouse’s shortcomings and weaknesses. It believes the best. Holds them in high regard. It breeds peace because it is born of the Spirit of God.
