Todays episode I’ll publish in a couple hours and for the first time I’m nervous

It’s cause I care too much I guess

Abusing yourself to health and happiness

I’ve been waiting for a long time to publish this episode and today is the day

I’m the kind of person who is guilty of using excessive exercising , food choices/ restriction and self isolation as a way to punish myself into health and wellness, am I ? Yes I was…

Gosh writing this out makes me sweat already but this is how I approached being healthy in the past and I’m paying the bill right now

I want to inspire people to have a more loving relationship with their bodies/ with themselves and using exercise as a way of expressing yourself , enjoying yourself , taking care of yourself rather than throwing weights through the gym and feeling the intensity of self destructive “ beast mode”.

Honour your body ! This little sentence used to trigger the hell out of me because of the deep self rejection I held within my chest

Today I can say I’m doing better

My body is becoming my strongest allie and also not caring about how people judge my body heals a lot.

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Free yourself from the ongoing destructive inner chatter become the strongest most authentic version of yourself.

Let’s dive in and find out more about this juicy topic that will most likely affect you in one way or another. 

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Unknown: 00:00:07

Hello, hello, and welcome to the Borealis

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experience. I'm your host Aurora. And I'm really happy to

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be spending some time with you today. I hope you're doing well.

Unknown: 00:00:20

It is December 8, no, it's actually December 9, some people

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are getting really anxious about Christmas already. I hope you

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can take it. And yeah, very relaxed way. And that you don't

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get too stressed out and that you just, yeah, enjoy some time

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with family or friends or people that you care about. And I truly

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hope that you're not going to be too lonely, especially now with

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COVID. It can be very difficult logistically and everything. So

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in these times, it is even more important, then ever, to be able

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to count on yourself to know that you have tools that anchor

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you down that center you they ground you and make you feel

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good, no matter what is happening outside of you. It is

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truly important for me, to help people be more themselves more

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centered, more grounded, because of what's going on at the

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moment. And please know that I'm the kind of person who is right

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among you, beautiful people.

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I'm not hovering above you and got it all figured out. I have

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my deep struggles. I have my depression, my constant

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friends, friend, that I need to embrace, sometimes harder than

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other times. And, yeah, I'm with you in this. And I share what

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has helped me in the past and what helps me in the moment. So

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everything I share here is just my experience my opinions. And,

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yeah, I'm not a medical doctor. But I still feel I could bring

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value into your life. If you want to support the show, please

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don't hesitate and hop over to Apple podcast and leave me a

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review there. It would mean the world to me, because that's kind

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of the podcasters currencies. That's how we compete with each

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other. And that's how I can Yeah, receive honest feedback

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from you as well. And when other people can read this, they can

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kind of see what my show is about and what you were learning

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and feeling while listening. And then they can decide for

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themselves if it's a value to them or not. So let's hop into

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today's episode. I'm a little bit nervous about this episode,

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because I care so much about this topic. And I'm very

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vulnerable when it comes to that topic. So yeah, just a heads up.

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I'm super excited to post this today on December 9 2021. So

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let's go abusing yourself into health, abusing yourself into

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happiness. What do I really mean by that? What I mean by that is

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that sometimes we have experienced something in our

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lives. That was very uncomfortable, that we don't

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want to experience again. And we've learned back then that

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changing our lifestyle. Eating healthy exercising on a regular

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basis can make you feel better. But some of us Me included we do

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this we engage in exercising and food change habits or whatever

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you call it to the nth degree. And what I mean by that is that

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exercising becomes so important in your life that you start

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neglecting your Real well being, and your relationships,

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especially, but you're starting to engage in exercising, because

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you've learned, okay, that's gonna make you feel good. I want

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more of this. So if I exaggerate, it's going to make

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me the happiest healthiest person in the world, right?

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While that's not how it goes, and that's what I've learned

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proximately, 10 years ago, that if you do engage in exercising

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with the wrong intentions, so wanting to belong, wanting to,

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yeah, be independent, wanting to be strong and resilient, wanting

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to be healthy, then you start losing other very valuable

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things in your life. And don't get me wrong, it is super cool

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to have a constant, a consistent practice. But what I want to

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encourage you to look at today is that we need a balance you

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need days off, you can be too rigid about your routine,

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because then that, again, is going to feel like a chore like

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a duty. And you're going to make people feel neglected, as well.

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Maybe you've had to work or lived through a lot of

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loneliness. And the gym exercising, gave you a sense of

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belonging. And you met a couple of really good friends there.

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And that's an awesome thing. But I also want you to look at your

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relationship outside of your gym, and how you take care of

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those. And how you got engaged with strangers on the street?

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Are you open hearted? Or are you very narrow minded, and you just

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want to get from A to B as fast as possible. I think you get

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what I mean, if we get too narrow minded with our focus, we

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are actually harming ourselves instead of doing ourselves a

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favor. Same goes with emotional health with happiness, it is a

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little bit different there. Because there it has more to do

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with how we feel internally, and then how we show up to other

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people. But it is really important that when we don't

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feel good, that we validate that when you're sad, when you're

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angry, when you frustrated that you find a way to express

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yourself in the most mature way possible. But at the same time,

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it is important to not how do I put it into words? To not think

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that, okay, this is how it is now, and you're going to be

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depressed for the rest of your life. And this is who you are.

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So you totally identify with your pain. And you kind of sit

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in that pain longer than necessary. That is not what I

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mean by that. What I mean by that is truly expressing

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yourself. And honoring how you feel validating how you feel.

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And then knowing that you will reach out for help if necessary.

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And you will not put on a mask until then. Because there might

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be people in your life that have a difficult time when you're not

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feeling well. Because maybe you are their provider, maybe you

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are their constant support and cheerleader, their rock. And

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now, if you decide to be sitting with your pain for a little

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longer than they feel like is good. They're going to try and

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get you out of that. And also because they care for you and

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because they don't want to suffer but also because they

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want you to see strong that they can't see you in a situation

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where they can't 100% depend on you. Do you understand what I

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mean? Like it's it's a really tricky situation. So that on one

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side, you need to honor and validate that you are in pain.

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Second part is to not over indulge in secondary gain,

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right, because all of a sudden, you can lean back, maybe people

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call more often, or really take care of you physically. And it

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starts to feel nice to be in that position, and then you see

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no point in getting any better. So to find a balance there, I

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want to honor it. But I also want to help myself. And when it

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comes to other people, to express how you feel. And then

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to not wait and see if they validate how you feel. Because

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some people will not, and the people who will, the people that

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you can keep very close, and they can help you get better.

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But the people who are impatient for you to get better, and are

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not trusting you to get better anytime soon. You just keep them

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at a gentle distance, and you don't, yeah, let them bully you

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out of your situation, you have to heal at your own pace. I'm an

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expert in putting these feelings away and wanting to be the

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strong shoulder. And I've done it so many times that I've

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burned myself out, literally. And it was not fun, because then

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it takes even longer to get back onto your feet. Right? I always

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let people distract me and entertain me. And then I thought

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Yeah, it's not that important. Anyways, my pain and I'm gonna

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go with them and let them distract me. But it was not the

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right thing to do for me. So I want to talk about it. Because I

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feel it is really important to honor your feelings, and to know

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that it is okay to feel really shitty at times, and it will get

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better and you will you fight your way, you will fight your

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way out of it. But it has to be your own journey. Right? One

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day, you're going to look back and be so proud of yourself and

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you will be able to share your story and help other people. If

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you let other people distract you, if you distract yourself,

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then it will just be longer suffering. So yeah, when it

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comes to abusing yourself and to being healthy and happy. I feel

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it's important to I don't know how to say it or not call people

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out on it, but to cut through people's bullshit and to next

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time when you feel that someone is overdoing it, like

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overcompensating. So they're actually not feeling good. And

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they want to show up as a strong person in front of you. You just

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cut through the bullshit and you ask them, hey, what's really

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going on? Are you okay? And some people might totally reject you,

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because it's painful, that now people can see that you're not

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actually happy. But I think it is important for you, my dear

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listener to be equipped with these tools. Because sometimes

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we do this unconsciously. And sometimes other people do it

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unconsciously. And it is your choice if you call them out on

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it or not. I want as a society that we become more transparent

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and more resilient to stress in being more transparent, because

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it is incredibly liberating. If you find people around you where

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you can just say, Hey, I'm having a shit phase. I will be

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back soon. Don't worry. And if you choose to wait for me, wait

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for me. If not, that's okay as well. Like, I think now that the

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whole mental health stigma is shifting and more and more

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people are coming out and talking about their depression

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about the eating disorders or whatever problem they have. We

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become more honest, and honesty results in more resilience. I'm

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very, very convinced about that. So yeah, I think that's it for

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today. That is my little message for you. If bullshitted my,

Unknown: 00:15:02

myself for many, many years, and now I'm happy to know that I can

Unknown: 00:15:08

be more and more honest with myself and with the people

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around me. And when people do not validate how I feel, then

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I'm still there for myself. And that feels incredibly

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empowering. And I want everybody who's listening to experience

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the same. I would burn to know what, what your thoughts are

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like, I would love this to be a dialogue more than a monologue.

Unknown: 00:15:41

So if you have any thoughts and feelings coming up, please share

Unknown: 00:15:46

them with me on Facebook, underneath my post here

Unknown: 00:15:51

regarding the episode and or shoot me a message. Let me know

Unknown: 00:15:59

that you are a listener and that you want to comment on my latest

Unknown: 00:16:03

episode, and I will make sure that I get back to you because

Unknown: 00:16:09

yeah, I'm very curious to know how you experienced this. Or

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maybe you know, somebody who is suffering and they keep abusing

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themselves and they think that our healthy, beautiful body is

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all that it takes to be happy. But that is not the truth. We

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can be totally dead inside and close to a heart attack. Even

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though we exercise all the time and run around all the time and

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drink our juices and eat our broccoli. Right. It's emotional

Unknown: 00:16:46

health. It is deep connection to other people that we also need

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to be healthy. Hmm, I'm getting really emotional here towards

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the end. I don't know why No, I know why it is because it is

Unknown: 00:17:02

such a dear topic to me. And, yeah, I'm just going to let you

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go now. Feel free to reach out to post and to let other people

Unknown: 00:17:14

learn about you. And I will be out there very soon again. Thank

Unknown: 00:17:20

you so much for listening. I appreciate you and Leslie. Bye

Unknown: 00:17:24

bye