RE-VIEW ALERT: Revisiting Episode 14 of Review That Review – Nair for Men & Sesame Place 🦸‍♂️🎢

Get ready for a RE-VIEW of Episode 14, originally aired on September 8th, 2021! In this fan-favorite episode, the Review Queens dive into two hilarious 1-Star reviews, lodge their complaints, and crown their Royal Highnesses. Today’s RE-VIEW is a condensed version, but make sure to revisit the full episode for all the juicy details! 🎧

Episode 14 Highlights:

• Nair for Men Review: Chelsey and Trey break down a side-splitting 1-Star Amazon review for Nair for Men – because hair removal doesn’t always go as planned! 😅
• Sesame Place Review: A 1-Star Yelp review takes aim at Sesame Place amusement park, and the Queens are here for the drama. 🎠
• Expect discussions on food-shamers, middle school writing exercises, and belt etiquette. Plus, what’s up with Donkeys and Magic 8 Wrecking Balls? You’ll have to listen to find out! 🧐

Timestamps:

• (04:24) Lodge A Complaint
• (08:55) Nair For Men Review
• (25:25) My Royal Highness
• (26:37) Royal Review!

Love what you hear? Don’t forget to rate and review us on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen. Your feedback keeps us going! 🌟

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About the Show:

Review That Review is an independent podcast produced by Trey Gerrald and Chelsey Donn. Sound design and editing by Trey Gerrald. Cover art by LogoVora. Theme song by Joe Kinosian, sung by Natalie Weiss. Voiceover by Eva Kaminsky.

This week, this is a super treat.

If you've been listening to this podcast at all, I'm sure you've heard us talk about Santino and his Cherries of Fire.

So, Baby, it's time to Review, Review That Review, Episode 14, which aired on September 8th, 2021.

The original episode contained two reviews, two complaints, and two Royal Highnesses.

But today's review is a bite sized version of the original airing.

So be sure to pop back and listen to episode 14 in full.

It was a total blast.

And please remember to leave us five stars on Apple podcasts and enjoy the episode.

Everybody's got an opinion, Every Californian and Virginian, It's so hard to tell who to trust and who to ignore, Someone's gotta settle the score.,

Trey and Chelsey will help you choose, Whose views win which ones lose, Online haters are coming for you, Baby, it's time to Review That Review!

Bye!

It's so good to see you.

Look at your little crown.

It's so good to see you and it's so good to not be seen by our listeners.

Well, unless you're on Patreon and then God bless you.

You beat me to it.

Anyway, hello everyone and welcome to Review That Review, the podcast dedicated to reviewing.

Reviews!

We're just like Siskel and Ebert, only instead of reviewing cinematic masterpieces, we rate and review those hilarious, scathing, and sometimes suspicious online reviews.

That's Chelsey Donn.

And that's Trey Gerald.

And together, Chelsey and I form

The review Queens

Chelsea Chel.

I see you've got a top knot and your headphones on.

How's your crown today, Tracy?

Oh cha . You know what?

I like the top knot.

Usually before we record I'm doing a little Pilates with watch that Rock Pilates, so this is what she getting on.

It's cute, regular.

Thank you.

My, my crown's good today.

I decided, like, that I think we should expand the definition of crown.

It's more like a head, like your crown.

Like, how's your, how's your cappy?

How's your crown?

How's the, what's hap, what's happening up there?

Put your cape

on, your cappy.

What's,

what's happening?

Things are good.

It's been an interesting week.

Had a little bit of a dental emergency and that's hard.

My dad's a dentist, as I think I've maybe mentioned before, I've become very reliant on him and he lives across the country and somehow my teeth, they like, they have a schedule.

They know when I'm going to be home and that's when generally issues pop up, but you know, this was the first time that an issue popped up and I couldn't get to him in time.

So it was a little bit, uh, jarring, uh, of an experience, but I'm getting through it.

We're gonna, we're gonna handle it.

It's gonna be fine.

You just reminded me with this dental talk, because I, you know, I have a list of complaints that I can, yeah, I just collect them for the podcast.

Yeah.

And it's for work.

It's for work.

One of the very first things I wrote down was Winnie's breath.

And she has a deep cleaning dental appointment where they have to put her under in September.

It's scary.

I get it.

I've done it.

Which is,

I guess when this will be airing is in September.

But regardless, I just thought about that.

But you know, my week so far has been pretty good.

This is a top secret.

So I'm gonna cup my hands over my mic.

As I tell you, David and I are planning a surprise trip.

To six flags for our nephew, Denver, who's been staying with us.

Oh my god.

So we've been secretly planning it.

We're going to do it Thursday.

Aw, you guys are the best.

I'm excited.

I like roller coasters.

I don't do as well on them as I did when I was younger, but I think it will be fun as long as I have SPF.

I do not do well on the roller coasters at all, by the way, in case you're wondering.

I do think it might be as you get older, I think like your center of gravity changes.

I don't know.

I just made that up.

I've never been a fan, but my like go to, I usually only go to Disneyland.

I feel like they have the most to lose.

Six Flags, they got something to lose over there too, but I look in the line for the youngest person in line and then I have a conversation with them.

That really tends to make me feel better.

Oh,

yeah.

Well, instead of feeling better.

Why don't we get into things that make us feel bad?

Chelsey, would you like to?

Lodge a complaint.

I'm so glad you asked, Trey, because I've been waiting all week for this moment.

Yes, I'd like to lodge a complaint against food shamers of any variety, particularly food shamers who shame you because you don't like a certain kind of food.

Like, yeah, like I don't like fish.

I get it guys.

Yes.

I've tried it.

Okay.

I've tried a lot of different kinds of fish.

I just don't like it.

It's a texture thing.

Like it's a flavor thing too, but like, it's mostly a texture thing.

And I, I don't like it.

And a lot of people really like fish.

And I think mazel to you, like, please enjoy your fish.

I'm not going to stop you from enjoying your food, but stop harassing me.

It's not.

And yes, That means I don't eat sushi.

Okay.

That's usually the follow up question.

But yes, I can relate because I also am not a fish consumer, but you Chelsey have no idea that you've just walked into a huge sense of turmoil for me.

I grew up as a Southern person in the South and my parents always cooked steaks well done.

And I once went on a trip with a family and we went to a steakhouse.

And I asked for my steak to be well done.

And I was harassed by the father and told how low class it was to do that, how it's offensive to the chef.

And I had like literally no idea, you know, but it instilled this deep, dark fear.

And since now, you know, I've mentioned this a lot in this podcast, but now that I'm married to a Yankee that's Jewish, they are just sort of like, get your steak how you want it done.

Shut up with all this confetching.

It's like, get it how you want, you know.

I mean, they still have food opinions, but they're sort of like, what do you mean?

Who cares?

Get the steak how you want it.

We're paying for it.

It's our experience.

Get the steak how you want it.

But, um, I really, there really is like cultural opinion about someone who gets a steak well done.

Oh my

God.

Yes.

I used to order my steak that way.

And I went to Nobu with my sister and yes, I didn't order fish.

I've been

there too.

I've been there too.

So I got the steak.

And I used to, I was like younger.

I used to get at medium well or whatever.

And I said, you know, they're like, how would you like it cooked?

And I was like, medium well.

And the waiter literally just goes medium.

I was

like, no, medium.

Well, and she's like, medium.

And it happened like three times.

And then finally I was like, yeah, medium.

Yep.

Medium's good.

Thanks.

Well, that really is.

The conclusion of this conversation because I trained myself to get my steaks medium because of other people's opinions on food.

I used to get ketchup with my steak when I was growing up

as a kid does.

Yeah.

And my parents would make me like whisper it, you know, or they'd ask for me, but like they'd whisper it.

They'd be like, she likes some ketchup.

You know what I mean?

Like it was like,

wait, that reminds me of that.

Like, Neil Simon monologue that every little boy does when they're like 11 or 12 and it's like, my aunt got, and you have to like keep whispering that the aunt got cancer because you can't say the word cancer.

Yeah,

anyway,

you can't say the word ketchup around steak either,

Why don't we jump into some inside stories from Yelp, Amazon, Google Reviews, TripAdvisor, What do you think about that?

Looking up some online written reviews and dissecting and breaking them down, Chels?

You

I think that's a really good idea, Trey.

I don't know what made you think of that, but it just

came to me off the top of my head.

Like, maybe that would be something interesting for us to do.

Yeah.

And now that you mention it, yeah, that would be great.

Let's do that.

Oh, good.

As you know, we are your trustee review queens.

We were just joking before.

We obviously know our role very well.

We each bring in a review from the internet that we feel needs to be inspected.

We read you the review.

We break it down.

We inspect it.

We talk about it.

And then we rate the impact of the review on a scale from one to five crowns.

It's a very regal process that we like to call,

Assess That Kvetch.

And Kvetch means complaint.

That's great.

This is, this is better than Yiddish with Dick and Jane, which I also own.

Um, Kvetch means complaint.

Kvetch, Jane.

Kvetch.

Anyway, um, Trey, I think your first, cause I went first last time, right?

Right.

Good job.

That's right.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I remember things.

Okay.

Take it away.

RQ.

Review That Review.

Okay.

I'm excited for today because I have a review from amazon.

com.

Okay.

I also want to give a little shout out right here.

A listener named Danielle sent me a A review for something that was very funny and it sent me down a spiral and I landed on this review, which is not the one that Danielle sent, but I wouldn't have gotten here if it had not been for Danielle.

So thank you, Danielle.

Yes.

Thank you.

Thank God for Danielle.

Thank God.

Okay.

Thank God.

We should

hear the review that she sent to another time.

It's coming.

Okay.

All right.

So today my review is a one star review from amazon.

com written by Santino.

No last name, just like, he's like, Oprah, Madonna, Santino.

They also have no profile picture, so.

Oh, okay,

great.

For Nair hair remover, men body cream, 368 milliliters pump.

Okay.

By Nair.

Yeah, oof, been there.

All right, let's hear it from Santino.

Santino's subject is Cherries of fire, oh no, I had the absolute worst experience with this product, I put the cream on my privates because I wanted to get rid of the hair, and so I tried it on one major spot below my v line,

And it came off pretty smooth.

At this point, I was like, quote, Damn, if it can get this part real smooth and get off all that hair, then I wonder how effective it will be on my cherries.

Oh no!

Oh no!

Oh no!

Oh, I think we know where this is going.

That's when I learned what was to come next was the biggest mistake I've ever made in my life.

I lathered the cream all over the parts that had hair and just waited in the bathroom with the shower on standby.

After the recommended wait time, I turned on the shower and began washing off all the hair.

Then after a few seconds, I felt a searing pain in my groin right,

right below my cherries.

Oh, no.

Oh, dear.

Okay.

Then after a few seconds, I felt a searing pain.

You've got a mute because I can't get through it.

I just keep, because it's coming through the headphones.

I just hear, I'm like, I just hear, I've already

covered, I covered you with my review.

Okay, just.

You have to join Patreon so you can see Chelsey laughing, okay?

I'm covering her.

Then after a few seconds, I felt a searing pain in my groin.

right below my cherries.

And I swear to you, this was pain like no other.

I went to check the source and I had a very small chemical burn right below my cherries.

The water only made things worse, and I was doing my best to wash off all the cream while enduring the worst pain I had ever felt.

As I was washing it off, I made another fatal mistake.

I went to the tip and I was in even more pain than I was already in to begin with.

So I finished washing it off, got out of the shower, and immediately did a fetal position in bed with this non stop searing pain.

Pain.

I desperately looked online for information on how to stop the pain and sources said I had to dip my cherries in some warm water for several days until the pain subsided.

So I did that.

And the pain did in fact go away when it was in the water and I swear to you this lasted a whole seven or eight days and going to the bathroom was impossible without a feeling of searing Pain.

I seriously do not recommend this product at all, because it gave me the worst pain I've ever felt in my life.

It might as well be used as a torture method, because that's seriously how bad it was.

All the hair did come off, but at what cost?

Everything.

Oh, my God, that was an experience.

Wait, I really was not anticipating this being like, I didn't anticipate the laughing.

So I mean, I thought it was funny that this that Santino refers to it as cherries, but I didn't think that it would tickle me.

But wow, it really tickled us.

God, that was.

so funny i've never heard anyone call them cherries me

either i actually haven't either

but i thought it was a great great substitute for this forum because i obviously immediately knew

yes it's funny because using this code name

yeah

i then felt Icky when Santino used the word tip.

It made me feel like, Oh, wait, what?

No, we're talking about cherries.

I know.

Let's go back to cherries.

Yeah.

Also, 85 people found this helpful.

Oh my God.

Okay.

What's your thought?

First of all, I've been there, Santino.

I've been there.

I, I've dappled quite a bit with the nair.

Oh, and even on the legs, here's like where I'm confused, but I guess maybe this sounds like it was a different experience in my, like one time I had.

You know, whatever, chub rub in the middle of my legs, and I put some like, nair on it, and it burned like, immediately, and then I was like, I gotta get this off, like right now, and then it still was an experience for a few days, so I wonder, Santino had no, usually you get like a warning sign, like right before it happens, it seems like in Santino's experience, Experience.

He waited the full eight minutes or whatever it was, and then it wasn't until he was in the shower, like washing everything off.

Yeah, good point.

That

he started to feel the pain.

Which again, not, not denying what happened here.

This is serious, but like that was, that was surprising to me.

Well, sometimes I have experience with, uh, chest hair.

Yeah.

I had to use NA when I was doing a play as a drag queen.

Mm-Hmm.

. So I had to like do it constantly.

And it does like, I feel like it's like the.

Wiping of the washcloth that kind of activates it activates it.

Yeah.

So, so much here.

First of all, like too much of a good thing, Santino.

Like if we would have just stopped the V, we would have been okay, you know, but that's not what we do as humans.

We need once we find something good, we're just like the curiosity mind starts going.

If this, then what about this?

I mean, I don't have my own cherries, obviously, but I imagine that's a sense.

That's a very sensitive skin.

You know, I don't know.

I would think I wouldn't.

It wouldn't be like shocking to me that you would have this reaction.

Not that I'm saying he asked for it, but like, I don't think on the box, does it clarify or not?

Like, I don't think you're supposed to use it for that.

It's interesting because now Nair makes a specific product called like private, right?

Like even for the women, it's like there's a separate Nair that's bikini.

There's like bikini Nair and then there's regular Nair.

And it's like, you would never use regular Nair on the bikini Nair because that would be a real, you know, catastrophe.

Like, Santino, clearly a poor guy, but to your

point, I appreciate that Santino literally quotes their thought process.

Like how you're saying, it's like, we always want to, we go one step too far.

Yeah.

We're like, Oh, it's like you can follow the narrative at least.

Yeah.

I appreciate that.

And I've had the burn.

It's terrible.

Oh,

yeah.

Yeah.

It's a terrible, gross.

Well, that was, that was a question that occurred to me, like, first of all, this whole process of seven or eight days of having to like, tea bag your cherries and water, like, that is the most outrageous visual in the world.

But also, like, wouldn't it hurt, like, just being in underwear?

Oh,

sure.

Everything hurt.

That's the thing.

Like, it's, it's a torture.

You can't avoid it.

Do you think that this is, um, real?

I do.

I do too.

Yeah, I do.

I totally do.

Cause I could see this happening.

I could see someone even like going to the ER for something.

Oh

yeah.

And also like the only funny thing about the review is the use of the phrase cherries.

Right.

I don't think Santino's trying to be funny.

I think Santino's I don't

think he is, but like it was hilarious.

Like I was dying.

I don't know.

I thought it was like very funny.

That's why I was a little disappointed.

Only spelling error comes at the second to last sentence.

I know, I noticed that.

It's so unfortunate.

We

almost wanted to do a rewrite for them, but we can't.

I know, I know.

We wouldn't be doing our job.

I mean, God, the, the tip situation, horrendous.

Especially after you're already experiencing cherries of fire.

I'm having a, like a visceral response to this, like just reading it and I don't even have to read it.

Cherries.

So like, I, I imagine any man reading this would probably be like, this would be very impactful.

I would think, I don't think it's going to stop anyone from ordering it, but we got to give Santino credit where credit is due and say, he's a good Samaritan.

He took one for the team.

That's what, you know, like,

I don't know where that falls on the review because it's like, is it going to make me not buy the product?

Like, probably not.

But is it going to teach me a hard lesson that I don't need to go down this road on my own?

Yes.

Yes, it would.

So it's like, if anybody is thinking about buying this and reading through the products and thinking about getting a little bit freaky with their cherries in the nair, they're Don't dip it there.

It's not like a dollop of daisy.

It's a dollop of fire.

Crazy.

Crazy.

I mean, a lot of reviews for Nair mentioned just chemical burns in general, because it is like, it is like searing.

I mean, the use of the word searing.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah.

But yeah, I do feel like this review, it's listed as 85 people found it helpful.

But I think that this is like should go on labels.

I mean, I think this should be like, this is the warning, like, you don't do this.

Like this is, this is for your chest hair, leg hair aren't like, if you're a swimmer, and you got greedy, just Don't do the private, sensitive areas.

That's insane.

Keep

it, keep it above the belt and below the belt, but not at the belt.

You know,

if you were Santino's grandmother, would you hang this on the fridge?

Oh, no.

I mean, first of all, if I were Santino, I don't know that I would be passing my cherry review along to my grandmother.

I mean, I really feel for Santino here.

I think, I think in terms of like his, um, empathy response.

Hi.

Oh yeah.

I think that Nair is so funny to me because it's like anything in life that is just like easy and breezy.

There's always a consequence.

You know what I mean?

Oh yeah.

Like it's like Nair is like, listen, like we created this amazing thing where instead of like getting on your, I don't know, hands and knees, shaving, doing all kinds of things, lather up, right?

Like it's a great thing, but it comes at a cost.

Oh, and it smells so bad.

It smells heinous, but like, yes, it, it's gonna burn if you leave it on too long, or if you put it in the wrong area.

I don't know.

It's so interesting when, when it comes to crowning, like, these kind of products, because I feel like, Nair, it's just something we all know.

We all know these facts about it.

If we're going to buy Nair, I find that like, if I'm going on Amazon to buy Nair, is it because I'm like, what is this strange hair removing device?

Or have I used it?

But like, it's possible, like, teenagers are born every day.

And, you know, if you haven't considered this, then, like, I do think it's valuable.

I also appreciate that Santino offers value to Nair by saying, look, this could be used as a torture device, like, Right.

He, Santino is not belittling the company, going angrily at them, It's actually just saying like, Wow, this killed me, my poor cherries, I shouldn't have done it, And for the love of God, don't make the same mistake, Don't do it,

Okay, Anything else you feel like we need to consider before we crown?

I don't think so.

The, the spelling is exceptional except for that one part, the grammar.

I think, you know, I believe, yeah, let's crown it.

Let's crown.

All right.

So, Chelsey and I each have our own set of one to five crown cards.

In an effort to be fair and not influenced by one another's cherries, we will simultaneously reveal our rating.

Good one.

The queens are tabulating.

I think I know.

Do you know?

Okay,

I think I know.

Yeah.

Total score.

I'm doing it.

Wow, Trey gave it five crowns.

The ultimate review queen.

I gave it four crowns today.

Trey, tell us why Santino is a review queen.

I was going to do four and a half, but I just based on how it landed in the room today.

I really didn't, I honestly didn't think it would like be hard to get through.

Yeah, I, I, I believe that Santino did not slander or slur Nair.

They shared their experience, which I do believe is going to be very common for people because I think that they stayed directly to the point and it was highly entertaining and hilarious, but not intentionally.

And I appreciated that it wasn't vulgar and I just think it's a really huge like Surgeon General warning here from Santino for free.

So for that reason, I gave it five crowns, ultimate, ultimate, ultimate.

What about you?

Tell me about four.

Yeah, I was also kind of between four and five.

I pulled out my half crown.

I thought about doing the four and a half.

The only reason why I took anything off, and I don't really know if this is necessarily Santino's fault, is just that I don't think, That it would keep me from putting it in the cart.

That's it.

Like, I think that I would read this and be like, thank you, Santino, like, well worth the four crowns for just the knowledge alone.

But I'm going to use it on just my V and just avoid the cherries.

So like, you know, the V

line.

Yeah, that.

Cool.

Not a V, yeah, everybody knows a good V.

The V line, not the V.

Not

the V, that's true, I should clarify.

There for men on your V.

This is for men, I'm talking about that V muscular thing that's like underneath guys that have like eight packs.

Anyway, so yeah, that was like why I took the, was considering between half and a full, because I don't think it would cause me to take a direct action in terms of, consuming the product.

Fair.

That's totally fair.

Great.

All right.

Thanks, Santino.

We hope your cherries are better.

Santino,

I, yeah, like, thank you for, for the lessons and the entertainment because that was hilarious.

Woof.

All right, my queen.

Well, we have reached the most regal portion of our show.

Chelsey, who are you going to induct today for

My Royal Highness?

I'm so glad you asked, Trey.

So I'm going to do, it's like a bit of a broad category tonight for My Royal Highness, but I'm going to give My Royal Highness to all the dogs out there.

It's like dogs, dogs are just so great and they add so much value to our life.

And I don't know what my life would be without a dog.

And I just.

I adore them and I think that they're just the most amazing creatures and I think it was like National Dog Day a couple days ago, but also let's celebrate the dogs every day because they, they do so much for us and our well being and dogs are great.

So I'm going to make dogs, My Royal Highness,

I love that.

Thanks.

And between the two of us, I mean,

I love dogs too.

I think that they need to be loved and pet always.

It's overdue.

And never trust someone who doesn't like dogs.

Just gonna say I said it.

Yeah,

you said it.

It's a good thing

to say for sure.

Do we have time, though, for a Royal Review, do we think?

Oh, girl.

Oh, girlfriend, girlfriend, don't get wacky crazy.

You know, we always got time for that.

Baby, it's time for some Royal Review.

Today's

Royal Review is Also from Apple Podcasts, listener Peaches1234579.

Peaches does not like the number eight for some reason.

Or six.

Oh.

You took my joke.

I was gonna do that at the end, but you totally, you totally clocked it.

It's okay.

Keep going.

Okay.

Five star review, and then underneath the five stars, Peaches has done five crowns, which is, oof, what a queenly move, Peaches.

Okay, she says, my self sabotaging brain tends to delve into dark and twisty podcasts, but that's not so great for my mental health.

This hilarious podcast is a welcome midweek reprieve that brings me so much joy.

The hosts are so professional and entertaining that it seems as though they've been podcasting for years.

I really do look forward to every episode and only wish it came out more than once a week.

Five crowns, Queens.

Oh, peaches.

That was so nice.

What a mensch.

I love that Peaches, uh, mentions mental health, which is so very important.

I'm also a consumer of True Crime Podcasts and I just, I love their love for us and I appreciate them wanting more.

Isn't that nice?

So nice.

And also, yeah, I agree.

The mental health thing.

It's, it's like one of the things I tell myself when I feel like what I do isn't worth anything.

It's just like what we do is we entertain and I need to be entertained all the time.

Just like watching comedies makes me feel so much better.

So the fact that I could be even like the tiniest part of Peach's day, God, wow, I'm getting a little verklempt.

I'm getting a little verklempt.

Well, thank you, Peaches.

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 7, 9.

That makes me think of, um, Why is 6 afraid of 7?

Cause 7 ate 9.

Thank you, Peaches.

We appreciate the review.

Yes, thank you.

We really do appreciate it.

So, Queen.

We've done it.

That's another round on the R U A R Q Ferris Wheel of Love.

I love that so

much better than the ear holes thing.

Good job.

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