Shownotes
Episode #166 Hear and Beyond: Live Skillfully with Hearing Loss with Shari Eberts & Gael Hannan
In this episode of Hey Boomer, host Wendy Green explores the topic of living skillfully with hearing loss, shedding light on the challenges faced by individuals with hearing loss.
She shares her personal experiences with the story of her mother's hearing loss and how that impacted her interaction with her mother and her awareness of some of the challenges.
Joined by special guests Shari Ebert and Gael Hannan, they discuss their collaborative book, "Here and Beyond: Live Skillfully with Hearing Loss," offering insights, strategies, and resources for better living with hearing loss. From the impact on relationships to the use of modern technology, this episode takes a deep dive into the world of hearing loss and provides valuable tips for both individuals with hearing loss and their loved ones.
Episode Overview
We learned that more than half of adults over 75 in the US experience age-related hearing loss, emphasizing the need for open conversations and support.
Shari and Gael discussed the stigma, personal challenges, and mindset shifts in living well with hearing loss, providing valuable tips for improved communication and enhancing relationships.
Shari and Gael highlighted the advancements in hearing technology, sharing their personal experiences with hearing aids, caption readers, and telecoil technology to streamline communication.
They emphasized the importance of not bluffing about understanding and openly communicating about hearing loss. Shari and Gael introduced the acronym HEAR, a mental checklist for overcoming communication challenges, and discussed various technologies and strategies for improving hearing.
Takeaways:
- Mindset Shift: It's important for individuals with hearing loss to focus on improved communication and mindset shifts rather than returning to previous hearing abilities.
- Effective Communication Strategies: Seeking help from audiologists, exploring hearing technology, and staying connected to loved ones are essential for living skillfully with hearing loss.
- Don't hide, don't bluff. Communication is a team sport.
- Ask for support. Ask for help.
Call to Action:
We would love to hear from you! Share your takeaways from this episode and please rate and review the podcast when you listen.
Email us your feedback and stay tuned for upcoming episodes where we continue to explore new topics and insights on thriving in the Boomer stage of life.
Connect with Shari Ebert:
- Website: livingwithhearingloss.com
- Email: shari.eberts@gmail.com
Connect with Gael Hannan
- Website: gaelhannan.com
- Email: hannangd@gmail.com
- Book website: HearandBeyond.com
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Transcripts
Hello, and welcome to Hey Boomer. My name is Wendy Greene, and I am your host at Hey Boomer. And at Hey Boomer, we are changing the conversation about getting older. Rather than seeing it as declining, We see it as the opening of a potentially exciting new and vibrant chapter, a time for self exploration, Self expression and learning! And today we're going to talk about hearing loss, and how to live more skillfully with your hearing loss. Hearing loss that comes on little by little as you age is Common. More than half the people in the United States older than age 75 have some age related hearing loss. More than half. My mother lost her hearing in her right ear when she was young.
Wendy Green [:So I grew up knowing that if I wanted her to hear me, I needed to be on her left side. She always referred to that as her good ear. As she has aged, the hearing in her good ear has diminished. She is totally dependent on her hearing aid now To be able to hear anything at all, and what she can hear is not really that great in many situations. Her loss of hearing has made me more aware of the challenges of people with hearing loss. My mother used to love to go to the symphony or to the theater, but she stopped going now because her hearing is so poor. And And even with some of the more advanced technologies, she just can't hear some of the bass notes or the treble notes or the The conversation when it's, you know, fast and rapid. We have had Several laughs over her misunderstanding of what has been said in conversation, and she laughs also when she realizes that Her response to what she thought we said was really pretty far out of context.
Wendy Green [:But having a sense of humor, although hearing loss is not funny, can be helpful I am finding that I have started to use closed captioning on some TV shows Because the dialogue is so fast and there are now people on some of the shows that I watch that have Accents from different countries, so maybe it's time for me to get my hearing checked. But because of all of What my awareness is on hearing loss and because I've noticed it in others beyond my mother, I'm really looking forward to my conversation with Sherry Ebert and Gail Hanon. They're the authors of hear and beyond, Live skillfully with hearing loss. Sherry and Gail both have hearing loss and have experienced the challenges that it presents. They've also learned to advocate for themselves because connections With others through communications is really what it's all about, right? That's the foundation of relationships, so stay tuned for what you can learn from them And text your friends. Have them join us for this important conversation. Or let them know that they can listen later on on a podcast or they can watch the recording on YouTube or Facebook. One more note.
Wendy Green [:If you want to turn closed captioning on so that you can better follow what we're saying if Hearing loss is something that is challenging for you and you use Google Chrome, try this. In Chrome, there are 3 little dots in the upper right hand side of your screen. If you click on them, you'll see settings. From the list on the left hand side, you will find accessibility towards the bottom of the screen When you click on accessibility, you can turn on live caption. When I tested this this morning, I found that the captions were showing up at the bottom of the screen, so go ahead and try that and see if that makes the show more full and complete for you. The streaming servers that I use to stream to Facebook, LinkedIn, and YouTube does not have closed captioning yet, but hopefully they're going to add that in the future. But before I bring, Gail and Sherry on, I want to tell you about a couple of of my sponsors. So first is the newest affiliate sponsor, Naked Wines.
Wendy Green [:And they pull in From the wineries all around, independent wineries, so you don't go through a middleman and you get your wines delivered right to you. And with your 1st order of 6 bottles of Naked Wines using my affiliate link, you're gonna get $100 off, which is pretty amazing. So the link is bit, b I t.ly/nakedwines Dash Hey Boomer! And every wine is backed by a 100% Hassle free guarantee, and there's no commitment. You can try it. If you don't like it, you don't have to buy anymore. The other sponsor I always like to tell you about is Road Scholar. Rhodes Scholar is the not for profit leader in educational travel for boomers and beyond. And what do you want to learn and how do you want to learn it? These are the questions that motivate Rhodes Scholar To create the greatest collection of learning adventures you'll find anywhere with classrooms as big as our national parks, As historic as Cuba and as focused on learning a new hobby, I guarantee you'll love learning with them.
Wendy Green [:So go to road scholar, roadscholar.org/heyboomer. And please use the slash heyboomer so they know I sent you, and you will see all of the trips that Rhodes Scholar has to offer. And now let's bring on Sherry and Gail. Hello, ladies.
Gael Hannan [:Hello.
Wendy Green [:Thank you for joining me today.
Shari Ebert [:Thank you for having us.
Wendy Green [:Yeah. I'm excited about it. Let me do a real quick intro for each of you so people get to know a little bit about you. Let's see. Sherry is a passionate hearing health advocate and internationally recognized author and speaker on hearing loss issues. She's the founder of Living with Hearing Loss, which is a popular blog and online community, and we're going to tell you how to find that. She's the producer of We Hear You, an award winning documentary about the hearing loss experience, And her book, which I'm pulling from today here and beyond, Live Skillfully with Hearing Loss, is coauthored with Gail and it is a survival guide to living well with hearing loss. Sherry holds an MBA from Harvard Business School and a BS in from Duke University and Gail is a renowned humorist author and public speaker on hearing loss issues If people find it hard to laugh at themselves, Gail is happy to do it for them.
Wendy Green [:Over the past 20 years, she has created awareness Campaigns, school programs, and award winning presentations that help people better understand the life with hearing loss. She has a passionate international following for her writing and, as I said, she is a coauthor of the book Here and beyond, living successfully or live successfully with hearing loss. Gail lives in Vancouver Island with her husband, Doug, aka the hearing husband. So, Gail, you're in Vancouver. And, Sherry, I didn't mention this, but you're in New York. How did you guys ever connect with each other?
Gael Hannan [:Initially, Sherry and I met, at HLAA, Hearing Loss Association of America, which is a fantastic organization. We met at a convention and through mutual friends, with hearing loss. So we were part of that community, and that's and that's how we originally met. Right?
Shari Ebert [:Yeah. Absolutely. And and it's and it's funny because we sort of knew of each other before we actually knew each other. So it's been quite the progression. And now, of course, we're, you know, so so close having spent all our time together during the pandemic writing our book.
Wendy Green [:How did when did you guys decide you were gonna write a book?
Gael Hannan [:Well, that started with me, to be honest. I knew I had written a first book called The Way I Hear It, and it was more memoir based, with Lots of humor and but also a survival guide. And there's a lot of those types of books coming out, and all of them are necessary and wonderful. We wanna increase the library of of of books on hearing loss, but I wanted to get back to to basics. I wanted to get back to information on how to live better, with hearing loss and just focus on the strategy. And Sherry writing in her blogs, it's always based on this, the the tips and trip. And I also knew that Sherry thought one day she'd like to write a book. So I'd like to write a book one day, and I Remember saying, oh, you don't wanna write a book.
Gael Hannan [:There's no money in it. And I remember
Shari Ebert [:saying that, Gail.
Gael Hannan [:You you don't Amber?
Shari Ebert [:No. I do. I do.
Gael Hannan [: I think it was April or so of: Gael Hannan [: nally saw each other again in: Gael Hannan [:Doesn't matter. We hadn't seen each other in years. So, anyway, that's how we started The the project. And first, we talked and talked and talked, and it was, the start of of what the in Casa Blanc. It's the beginning of a beautiful Mhmm. Beautiful friendship. Yep.
Wendy Green [:Yeah. Yeah. Well, that's a yeah. And then what a better time to do this than during the pandemic? So I found the book So enlightening, you know, because, like I said, I've been aware of hearing loss, but never saw it As a stigma because I grew up with my mom having hearing loss, but you mentioned that in the book. It's a big problem for people, and I'm Now, like I said, I should probably get my hearing checked, and like, oh, maybe I don't want to. So I know. Right, Gail? So, can you tell me and I think, Gail, you were born with this, right, but Sherry Started later or experiencing it. What are some of if you're comfortable sharing some of the feelings of, Like the stigma of hearing loss.
Shari Ebert [:Yeah. Well, my story is sort of all about Stigma, to be honest, because I first noticed my hearing loss, I was in my mid twenties. I was in graduate school. But I learned all about stigma by watching my father who also had hearing loss and he was credibly stigmatized by it. He would do anything to hide it. I mean, he wore hearing aids, but you never saw them. They were hidden Down behind, you know, long hair even after that was, you know, definitely out of fashion. But at parties, he would sort of disappear.
Shari Ebert [:And the family would be looking around for him trying to figure out where he'd gone. And I didn't really understand what he was doing until I had my own hearing loss. And he was probably struggling to hear in that loud environment, And he didn't want anyone to figure out his secret. Now I don't know if it was a secret because hearing loss is often we think we're keeping it secret, But people can tell because, maybe, we're not answering questions appropriately or we're just not, As engaged as maybe we were in the past. And so when I first discovered my hearing loss, I hid it. No. I was following in his footsteps, and I felt that I had learned that this was just an unmentionable topic. But once I had kids, everything really changed for me.
Shari Ebert [:Because my hearing loss is genetic, I always worry that I may have passed it on to them. And I didn't want to be showing them those same behaviors. Right? Because they were watching me do the same things I had seen my father too and so I was passing on this stigma. So, I needed to change that. So, I just decided to accept My hearing loss finally after all those years and started wearing my hearing aids all the time and talking about it and starting a blog and writing a book and Really just being out there because I feel like the more that we can normalize hearing loss, the easier it will be for others to their hearing loss too.
Wendy Green [:Yeah. Do you have anything you wanna add to that, Gail?
Gael Hannan [:Well, Yeah. Just the the feelings, I think what you asked about, the stigma. I've a real boomer baby was born in the mid fifties, and, It was mild as a child and moderate and then profound and then, like, essentially deaf without technology. The resources weren't there. There were no resources. There was no, supports. And, gosh, it didn't I mean, the only person I knew with hearing loss was my great grandmother. And, and so I grew up without those resources, and, and I was embarrassed by it.
Gael Hannan [:No. I was lucky That I my parents were both very good communicators, and as a child, they made me say that I have hearing loss and and, But still as an adult, that was hard to do. And hearing aid, when I finally got 1 at age 21, it felt like a satellite dish on the side of my head, and I would, You know, kinda hide it like Sherry's father. So there was all those feelings, and it wasn't until I met finally another person With hearing loss, that life changed. And I just to briefly tell that story, I was 40. I was expecting my baby, and I was, Oh my gosh. I'm gonna be responsible for a baby. I mean, oh, there was so much I mean, I was worried.
Gael Hannan [:What if I didn't? Yeah. I mean, it's hard enough having a baby at 40, although it really it's different, I guess. But how would I hear My child crying in the middle of the night, which don't worry about that. I mean, partner jabs you in the ribs and bad. That's what the hearing husband has his his role. What if I what if I didn't hear him burp? Would he blow up? And I don't think I ever did hear him burp, but I thought, who who tells you these things? And nobody told me these things except other people with hearing loss. I reached out for help. For the 1st time, I went to a conference, and this woman sat down with me.
Gael Hannan [:She, she's still a close friend, and she had a baby in her arms, her 4th. All of them survived, so that was a good sign for me. And he told me, you can do this. You can, and these are some things you need to know. And that weekend at that conference was when I realized I had been feeling inferior. I Felt lesser than. I felt alone. I felt no one understood me, and, that was the beginning of this next journey in my life, not only as a mom, which was great, and he's he's fine, by
Wendy Green [:the way. Grew up in the He didn't blow up.
Gael Hannan [:Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He's ill. And but but my life with advocacy, and I became passionate about helping people understand What it's like to live with hearing loss, the impact of hearing loss, and that was just coincidental with the, the booming of technology. So it was good timing.
Wendy Green [:Yeah. Well, you know, and that's a that's a brilliant story because I don't think anybody would have mentioned that to you because those with Good hearing, perfect hearing, wouldn't have even thought to say, don't worry about it. He's not gonna blow up if you don't hear him burp. We would never have thought of that. But but part of what you both have talked about moves into the part in your book where you talk about mind shifts. And I think that's what happened with both of you, and one of that's one of your skills for living Skillfully with hearing loss. So would you talk about that?
Shari Ebert [:Absolutely. I mean, mind shifts are such an important part Of living well with hearing loss because our attitudes affect our behaviors and our emotions And so if we can think about our hearing loss in a better way, we can by definition live more comfortably with it. And one of our biggest mind shifts, and I think we were both sort of talking about it a little bit in our stories, is that When we shifted our focus to hearing better, to communicating better, we set the right goal. Right. We set a goal that's achievable. We may never hear the way we used to. We we won't, and that's okay. But if we focus on communicating better, then we can maintain those relationships and stay connected to the activities that we love.
Shari Ebert [:So, it's all about how we can think about it and frame it in our mind, in order to have that better approach to living skillfully.
Gael Hannan [:Yeah. It's like, when we learned, each of us, by attending separate time, Going to a conference and meeting other people and learning that, wow. I mean, look at the the that it's it's it's okay. And These were the people we met were highly functioning, and we're not alone, and it's okay. And it and it's, It it's all about you mentioned in the intro, Wendy, is that communication is the foundation of relationships. It communication is the glue That connects us to other people in the world around us, and hearing loss can impact that. And it's just important to find ways to We talked about communicating better. There are so many aspects of of communicating.
Gael Hannan [:It's not just Hearing, as Sherry said, we're never gonna hear better. It's all of the other thing, and that's what we we talk about. You know? We kind of have a 3 legged stool A better communication. A 3 legged stool never wobbles, and, yeah, even on uneven ground. Don't ask me why that is because I haven't got a clue, but it's. And so mindSHIFT, as you mentioned, is one of those legs, how important it is. Technology, really, where would we be without technology? And 3rd is what we call communication game changers, the nontechnical strategies that we use, to, communicate. That's you know, speech reading, self identifying with hearing loss, not bluffing, you know, not, You know, pretending we understand what's going on when we haven't got a clue.
Gael Hannan [:So, sorry. I just kind of we get very excited about this because, We found a way to this point in our own lives. It took our whole life to do it, and we're we're just very passionate about helping other People simplify their hearing loss journey.
Wendy Green [:Yeah. And you came up with the before we get to some of those other 2 legs, You came up with the acronym HEAR, h e a r, as we begin on the journey of Discovering our hearing loss. So how about you share what that acronym means?
Shari Ebert [:Well, absolutely. I mean here is one of our favorite Rules, actually, for changing any communication situation that might be challenging. So it's with a mental checklist that we Go through, whenever we're having trouble hearing. So the first h is hearing check and that's can I understand what My communication partner is saying, and if you can, then you're done and that's easy? But if not, you move on to the next thing, which is to evaluate the situation. And here's where you figure out what do I need to do to improve it so I can communicate better. And that could be environmental things, so maybe the lights need to go up or the background noise needs to go down Or maybe it's something with your communication partner. They need to speak louder or slower or take their
Gael Hannan [:Or not or not at all.
Wendy Green [:Depending on their partner. Right, Gail?
Shari Ebert [:And then the a is articulate, and that's where the mind shifts really come in, right, because we have to have that courage to express what it is we need from another person to do to help us in this communication. And this is not a selfish thing to do. This is a better thing to do For both sides of the communication. Right? Everyone has the goal of understanding and so but it's up to us to explain what it is that needs to happen. And then the r is revise and remind because a lot of times people forget, oh, I was supposed to speak a little bit louder or a little bit slower. It's hard for people to change, you know, the way they regularly communicate, so it's just to remind yourself to remind them. So h e a r. It's really easy.
Shari Ebert [:It's quick. It takes longer to talk about it than it does to actually implement it, But it's a it's a wonderful cheat sheet for people with hearing loss to really turn around any tough listening situation.
Wendy Green [:Yeah. Thank you. And June just put up this comment. She says, don't bluff. It's so important. It's nothing to be ashamed of. So be open about it. Let people know mostly they will cooperate.
Wendy Green [:So
Gael Hannan [:June, thank you. Sorry. Sorry. I just wanna say thank you, June, for bringing that up. We shouldn't blop, but we do. Even I do. I mean, I am a master bluffer. I'm the queen of bluffing.
Gael Hannan [:But it it this has been a key thing that I've been passionate about talking about not bluffing, But it's very easy to do. If you're in a especially if you're in a group conversation, you're trying to follow people don't realize the energy that we put into trying to follow a conversation or stay focused, especially if you're lipreading. So there's fatigue, of listening. And sometimes it's just easier to tune out. We we sometimes we just don't have the Sherry mentioned the courage to Say, oh, I I'm I'm sorry. I I'm I'm not following. But if we can find a way to bluffing less, that helps. And sometimes it's as simple as Being aware of when you bluff.
Gael Hannan [:I mean, if you're gonna go to a noisy, dark restaurant, how well are you gonna hear there? How, Well, how what's the likelihood you're gonna bluff? It's gonna be high. So, bluffing is a really key thing that, we need to be aware of and try to, To do it less.
Wendy Green [:Yeah. And that was one of the things that I learned from your book too is that I I had no concept of how exhausting It was to try to communicate when you're struggling so hard to to hear, to lip read, to make sure the Environment's right. You know, it it has to be exhausting. I never even thought about that. So that one of the reasons I'm so glad to be doing this show because I think it validates it for so many people. So thank you for what you wrote. Now you, we've talked a little bit about hearing aids. But in the book, you've also talked about so many other technologies or skills that help you hear in different situations.
Wendy Green [:Can you elaborate on that?
Shari Ebert [:Well, we really want people to understand that that hearing aids are terrific, But they are not a standalone cure for hearing loss. So there are lots of other technologies and other skills like we've been talking about. But in terms of of technology specifically, for me, personally, it's all about captions. Captions, captions, captions, captions, captions, Everywhere I go, I always had this dream that, like, people are gonna start having captions on their forehead, and, like, wouldn't that be fabulous? That has not happened yet, but, you know, give it time. But, you know, I use the Chrome browser almost exclusively because it does have this captioning feature that you were talking about. So any video that I'm watching on YouTube or wherever, This little bar will move pop up with the captions. I can move it around, and they're not perfect. Like, they're, they're AI, Artificial intelligence captions, but they're pretty good.
Shari Ebert [:Usually from the context, I can figure it out. I love to use caption readers when I go to the movies, when I go to the theater. So the, at the movies, it depends on the The brand of theater company, some of them have glasses that you put on where you do get, like, these captions that are sort of Out, in the air and you can watch them and adjust them onto the movie. Others have ones that go in your cup holder and you could sort of Tilt the the little reader over and position it onto the screen. So there are ways to get captions in in so many places and, of course, on TV, like you were saying, Captioning, everything. But I know Gail has other ones that she likes too.
Gael Hannan [:What do you think? Oh, Technology. Now I Sherry's kind of our tech guru because, I don't understand how technology works. I just accept it as magic. Sherry, quick question. I've always because I used when I used to go to the movies, I don't tend to, and it, Loved it. You could put this thing in your drink holder. Where are you where are you supposed to put your drinks? You gotta hold it on the hand.
Shari Ebert [:Or your or your husband.
Gael Hannan [:Yeah. I use all sorts of technology. And right now, what where I'm, talking With you from Vancouver Island on the far side of of, where is it? I might so I'm streaming Through my computer and my hearing aids, I'm just using this little mini mic. And our cell phones are, it's sort of the base. It's got apps on it. So, there's all sorts of technical devices that connect too. And our cell phones are fantastic. They are a source of captions.
Gael Hannan [:So speak to text, which is getting better all the time, especially in Noisy situations. Sherry and I attended a a conference of hearing care professionals, audiologists, a few weeks back. And there wasn't the, accessibility we were used to. This these were hearing care professionals. So there was no captioning, and there was no, telecoil technology. So we were we were depending totally on the captions on the phone. And, Uh-huh. So one of the fallbacks is, one of the, issues that Sherry said it's not perfect yet is that it sometimes doesn't pick up people whose language first language isn't our own, so their accent is heavier.
Gael Hannan [:And we were watching a totally different reading a totally different script. All of a sudden, this kind of sexual word jumped up, and we looked up at the speaker. It was just him the way his English was being interpreted by, so it's not perfect yet. But For the most part, very, very helpful, in a difficult listening situation. Those are just examples of what both Sherry and I use all the time. So
Shari Ebert [:Important to mention the Bluetooth. Right? Because a lot of the hearing aids now have Bluetooth capabilities. So You can stream phone calls directly to your hearing aids. Right? That's part of, I think, Gail, how you're using your streamers through the the Bluetooth with the, with Your computer. So it's a very, very useful technology that most hearing aids have. And then there's something called a t coil, a telecoil, That is a different technology that sometimes is in public places. It's like it's really just kind of a wire around the space And if you use a a special t coil setting on your hearing aid, you can tap right into a sound system of a venue. So It's another good thing to ask, you know, before you're going to the theater or somewhere, oh, do you have a loop in your conference room or your theater or what have So Okay.
Gael Hannan [:So I told you she was the expert. Yeah.
Wendy Green [:I know. You did. You did. So something like The apps on your phone and the and the Bluetooth and the t coil will stream it right into your hearing aid, which would be like Those of us who have don't have hearing loss would hear normally. Is that right? It's kind of similar to that?
Shari Ebert [:Yeah. I mean, it's never gonna be normal. Right? But it's definitely if you are in a situation where someone is speaking At a large distance away, like, there's a speaker at the front of the room, it will bring the sound right into your ears, which is So tremendously helpful because Yeah. Trying to hear that from so far away, the microphones on our hearing aids are not going to pick that up at that distance. Right? So it allows us to hear things that are farther away over a sound system. And then for Bluetooth, you know, just if you wanna make a phone call, you can just dial it up and you can hear it right in your ears. It's pretty convenient.
Gael Hannan [:Yeah. Same as hearing what we call we call you hearing people. Same as hearing people, but, so we're able to Yeah. Exactly. So but we're able to understand it better because the sound is closer, it right There. And and it just, it's been incredibly life changing. There's so many people stopped using the phone. And in fact, with the landline, I don't really like to use it.
Gael Hannan [:I mean, I can use it with telecoil, but it doesn't give me the same, quality of conversation that you can get with with modern technology. So it just really, there never been a better time To have hearing loss than now.
Wendy Green [:Yeah. Well, that's a positive spin on it. Right? Another mind shift.
Gael Hannan [:Yeah.
Wendy Green [:Yeah. So following along with the whole idea of communicating, because, I mean, even us hearing people Have trouble communicating a lot of times. You don't get your point across or you don't get understood, so it's a challenge all the time. It's another comment from June. She says even with hearing aids, it's difficult to understand what pea people in large groups. And and I think it's okay to ask people to Slow down and look at you when they're talking, which is something you talk about in your book. So It's, it's, again, it's the courage to do that, to not feel ostracized or different or less than or any of that. You you absolutely have a right to be part of the conversation.
Gael Hannan [:Yeah. I always say, we have the, It's not just about hearing. It's about being heard. And we are people who deserve to hear and be heard. We wanna just be We parted the conversation. Why? Just because we have hearing loss, should we accept not being able to communicate? It it it it It's crazy that that that thought. And, you know, I feel that the stigma is disappearing. Sherry doesn't think it as much as as I do.
Gael Hannan [:But it is disappearing. But it these are, it's drummed into you. It's and someone who developed, like, through the year. Someone who develops hearing loss and needs a hearing aid, you know, in their early seventies or eighties or whenever, that stigma, as Sherry said earlier, it's like, what her father went through. I've heard Sherry tell tell that story so many times, and it's still moving to me. But it we just feel that we don't have the right to ask. Oh, we don't wanna bother people. We don't wanna slow people down.
Gael Hannan [:We don't wanna Reverse the conversation, and we just need to accept we're only informing people of a fact. And our They wanna they wanna communicate with us too, so we're improving their communication as well as ours. So we really encourage people to say, so what? I have hearing loss. You've got other issues. Mine's hearing loss. This is how we can make it better.
Wendy Green [:Yeah. I think that's that's brilliant. Interesting question. Brad says, if an audiologist tells you that you need a hearing aid, can you rely on this, Or are some of them just trying to sell you a hearing aid?
Shari Ebert [:Wow. Well, I mean, they should show you Your hearing test, your audiogram, and I'm hoping that you would select an audiologist that is licensed and perhaps, You've spoken to other people, word-of-mouth that are recommended. I mean, there is sort of this back and forth between people with hearing loss and And audiologists and, you know, sometimes they don't use person centered care in the way that they could. They don't take our feelings into out in the way that they could. And it feels like they're just trying to shove something down our throat. So our recommendation is to really find That audiologist that you feel like you can trust, that you're connecting to, that have the qualifications, but also the empathy And the the communication style so that you feel like your needs are being heard and understood. And it's important to also keep in mind that any reputable audiologist or hearing instrument specialist We'll have, a trial period. So it's not like you are gonna have to buy that hearing aid And, you know, hope it works.
Shari Ebert [:You have an opportunity for, you know, 30 to 60 days to try that out in real life. But, you know, it's important to find that right audiologist, the one that you feel comfortable with, and you don't feel like they're just in it to sell you something.
Gael Hannan [:But chances are I'm sure not sure if you said his name was Brad, but, chances are If you're at an audiologist for you're there for a reason. There's certain things that have have sent you there, and They have assessed your hearing and they say you would benefit from a hearing aid. Chances are you would. Hearing aids are really one of the first that's a first step to better communication. But as Sherry said, that relationship With your hearing care professional is very, very important. It should be built built on on mutual trust. But if you If they say you need a hearing aid, chances are you really will benefit from 1. So, I encourage you to pursue it if that's where you're at in the stage of your hearing journey.
Wendy Green [:Yeah. And you can always get a second opinion, go to another audiologist. You know? So but you mentioned in the book about all the training they have, years years years of training. So yeah. Let's see. Jeannie said something about tinnitus, which you also talk about in your book, tinnitus. Can you, address That and and is there any way to manage that or even say what it is?
Gael Hannan [:Well, Tinnitus or or tinnitus, either way is, you know, correct potato potato.
Shari Ebert [:You
Gael Hannan [:know, tinnitus is A growing problem and a huge chunk of the population experiences tinnitus in some form or another. Both of us have it. Sherry's is, managed largely by her hearing aids. Well, The sound from her hearing aid will in her brain will override the the tinnitus sound. Mine is much more, severe and and complicated. It really is one of the last frontiers or a new frontier in research. You can have tinnitus without having hearing loss, but quite often, the 2 can go together. At right now, there's no cure.
Gael Hannan [:If you see on Facebook these ads for these multivitamins that will take care of your tinnitus, Don't waste your money. I I I honest to goodness, don't waste your money. There are different, Therapies that are helpful and both of us have found that a healthier lifestyle, Including mindfulness and meditation because it's all about those neural pathways. And I have to thank Sherry for this. Around the time when she and I first started becoming close, we talked about this a lot. And I have found that on days where I, Get some good exercise. You get that cardiovascular. There is a link.
Gael Hannan [:Cardiovascular exercise and, Meditation, it calms the neural pathways that my tinnitus will be less. And I and you're also reducing stress at the same time. Do you want something to add to that, Sherry? Because it's a huge topic. Yeah.
Shari Ebert [:Yeah. A huge topic. And I think that for tinnitus, It it impacts people emotionally. Right? I mean, you wonder, what the hell? Why is that noise? Is anyone else hearing that? I used to ask my husband all the time, like, are you hearing that Sound. And so it really can be quite, emotionally problematic. But like Gail was talking about, we can find these Tools. What what always, you know, gets my ire going is is you go to a doctor, you go to someone and they say, well, there's nothing we can do about tinnitus. And there is always something that you can do to live better with it.
Shari Ebert [:Right? You may not be able to take a vitamin and have it go away, But through meditation, through better living, we've had a lot of success. There's also something called cognitive behavioral therapy, which is actually something that's used to manage all different types of stressors in people's lives, where you just learn through Practice, and there's actually a number of apps that do this, to associate something different with that unpleasant sound. So it's not like, oh god, I hear my tinnitus and you get all stressed out. You've learned to sort of say, okay, I hear that sound and it's not very pleasant. I'm going to take a breath, and I'm going to continue on my day. And it's really about, I guess, sort of a mind shift. Right? About shifting How you allow yourself to react to it and it's not easy, but certainly with practice and with the time It can be easier to live with, so there is definitely hope.
Wendy Green [:I may have to have you guys back. There's just So many questions and and so much more that I got from the book that I wanted to talk about, but we are running out of time. So I wonder if You could share, you know, 1, 2, 3 of your favorite skills, hacks, whatever you wanna call them, For living skillfully with hearing loss that my audience can take away.
Shari Ebert [:Well, we have so many. It's hard to
Wendy Green [:I know you do.
Gael Hannan [:I would
Shari Ebert [:say a couple of them and then, Gail, of course. I'll say 1 or 2 and then, Gail, you Some as well. I mean, I I think if you if you think you're having trouble hearing, please take a hearing test. Explore hearing technology. It's Critical to stay connected to the people and the activities that you love. And I would say, don't hide. You know, communication is a team sport, So asking for help to communicate better is not weakness. It's actually strategic, and it creates a closer relationship Between you and the person that you're talking to.
Gael Hannan [:Okay. What's left? Well, you know what? Support. We don't communicate in a vacuum. And I I talk about the hearing husband, but he, I allow him to help me, and I ask him to help me. And we make support networks of of People like, if you're working in an office, let people know that you have hearing loss and make them your support team. And so with your, your family, your children, your friends, my girlfriends were my support team Growing up, they helped me fill in the blank. So again, as Sherry said, it's just reiterating this. Don't be afraid to ask for help Because you do need help, but you need help to communicate, and that's what we've been talking about.
Gael Hannan [:There is help available, and people will give it to you.
Wendy Green [:Yeah. Yeah. And we and it's all about communication. So let me, share the book. The website for the book is Here and Beyond, Which is the name of the book, Hearing Beyond, and it's Live Skillfully with Hearing Loss by Sherry Eberts and Gail Hanon.
Gael Hannan [:And it's available anywhere books are sold online in bookstores. So
Wendy Green [:And and it I mean, even if you Don't have hearing loss, but you know people who do, I would recommend you read the book because it just gives you so much insight. So, Gail has her own website, gail, g a e l, hannon, h a n n a n.com. So you can look there for some of her resources, and Sherry has a website called living with hearingloss.com, and that's where her blog is, other resources, and, of course, the book is available On on those websites too. Right? Yeah. So you 2 have been amazing. Thank you so much for what you shared today. And you know what? All of you listening, I love your comments, and so leave us comments If you're listening live, leave us comments. If you're listening to the podcast, it helps us know that we are giving you the information you want.
Wendy Green [:So thank you for all of that. I also wanted to remind you to check out Naked Wines. You can go to bitbit.ly/nakedwines dash hey boomer, Check out your first 6 bottles for a $100 off. I think that came to like $39 or something when I looked at it last time. It's pretty cool. And then, as you're planning for your vacations after the holidays, go to road, roadscholar.org Slash heyboomer and plan a very exciting trip! So next week, Oh gosh. Next week will be the last show of season 6 for Hey Boomer, And that's gonna be me. I'm gonna wrap it up.
Wendy Green [: you what my word will be for:
