In this introductory episode of Reclaiming Ourselves, host Sonya Stattmann talks about the importance of self-discovery, and gets candid about her own lifelong journey to reclaiming herself. 

Sonya opens up about her self-discovery process and why this was so important to reclaiming her power & gifts. She also discusses her calling to help others in their journey to reclaiming themselves. In this episode, you get a chance to know Sonya, why she started this podcast and some of the fundamental experiences that shaped who she is today. 

Join us as we discuss: 

• 11:11 Some of the pivotal moments that shaped Sonya’s personal journey to reclaiming herself.
• 25:58 Why Sonya felt called to step away from business coaching and focus on helping people develop and nurture their full selves. 
• 32:16 What “reclaiming yourself” means, and how the process of reclaiming ourselves can change the impact we have on the world.
• 42:45 How to recognize when life is telling you it’s time to reclaim yourself.

Resources mentioned in the show: 

• Author Judith Duerk https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/320512.Judith_Duerk 
• Author Amy Harmon https://www.authoramyharmon.com/ and her book The Bird and the Sword. https://www.authoramyharmon.com/the-bird-and-the-sword.html 
• Sonya’s playlist, “Embodying Me” on Spotify https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4aXROaT7CYrrleVoISNHEy 
• Trailer for the Hulu Original series Normal People https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x1JQuWxt3cE 

Learn more about the co-hosts: 

---> Sonya Stattmann is the host & creator of Reclaiming Ourselves™. She is a TEDx & corporate speaker and has been working with leaders around personal development for the last 22 years. She teaches workshops & offers small group programs around emotional intelligence, transformational & embodied leadership, and energy management. You can find more about her here:

Website: https://www.sonyastattmann.com/

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/sonyastattmann/

---> Laura Shook-Guzman, co-host of Reclaiming Ourselves, LMFT, and Somatic Psychotherapist for entrepreneurs has been a mental health professional for 23 years. She’s the founder of three businesses; the world's first Wellness Coworking Community Soma Vida, the global community Women Who Cowork, and her own therapy practice, Conscious Ambition. You can find more about her here: 

Website: http://www.laurashookguzman.com/

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/laurashookguzman/ 

What you can do next:

1. For more episodes, opportunities, and information on the hosts, visit http://reclaimingourselvespodcast.com/
2. Love the podcast? Get episodes delivered to your inbox with articles related to the topics we talk about. You can sign up at http://reclaimingourselvespodcast.com/
3. Need a little weekly magic? Sign up for Worthy Love Notes & weekly affirmations here https://www.sonyastattmann.com/self-worth-affirmations-2/  

Thank you for being you. We are so honored to have you as a listener!

How would someone that's listening recognize that they

need this level of reclaiming, that they, that they would need to work with you.

And what does that even look like?

I I'm really big on trusting your gut right.

And trusting the, a feeling.

So I feel like when people listen to me and they know they're ready to work with

me, there's a, there's a feeling there's a, there's something that pulls them.

But oftentimes some of the circumstances are they're feeling blocks in their

world in what they wanna create.

And of course, a lot of people, when you look at sort.

The topic of this conversation that we're having.

So reclaiming ourselves, you know, they're feeling disconnected to who

they are, or they struggle to tap into what their mission is or purpose

is, or maybe they've remembered in the past and they've forgotten again

in their current circumstances.

And so I feel like at the core of the people who wanna work with me,

there's this desire to know themselves.

Right.

This desire to understand how they work and operate and how to craft

their life in a way that really is aligned with who they are.

If you know, there is something deep inside of you that is yearning to be

seen, to be known and to have expression.

If there's something you need to reclaim and remember maybe it's your

power or your purpose, your gifts.

This is the podcast for you.

Welcome to reclaiming ourselves.

I'm your host, Sonya Statman and I'm honored to have three amazing

co-hosts Lauras Guzman, Belinda Hahn.

And Emily SEI here with me on this journey to self discovery every week,

we're gonna help you unravel and remember what it means to reclaim

yourself to own who you are to recognize your innate worth and greatness.

Now, those podcast is a deep dive into self development,

healing, and empowerment.

So hold on.

Here we go.

Just a quick note, before we dive into today's episode, these initial

episodes are introduction episodes.

One of the reasons I chose to have co-hosts instead of guests, was to give

you the opportunity to get to know us.

And to spend the topic episodes talking about the topics.

So today's special episode is a deep dive into one of the co-host stories.

It's gonna give you context for why we are here and what we

have to contribute this season.

Enjoy getting to know us.

Thank you for listening.

And if you wanna learn more, be sure to visit reclaiming ourselves podcast dot.

Welcome back to reclaiming ourselves.

And actually this is kind of our first pre episode.

I'm so excited because basically before we start really diving into the

topics in this podcast, I'm going to be interviewing all the co-hosts and today

Laura is going to interview me, which is very, very weird for me because I'm

usually the one directing the questions.

So we'll see how this goes.

So, Hey Laura, thanks for being here and helping me with.

Absolutely.

Yes.

It's time.

I know it can feel a little awkward, but it's time for you to be in the spotlight.

yeah.

And sometimes, and sometimes yeah, it takes like someone else being able

to pull out all the little GC details to, to help you tell your story,

which I think a lot of listeners are thinking, oh yeah, I know so much.

I've listened to Sonia for years.

Or they may have worked with you.

They may know a lot of things.

Well, what we're hoping today is to kind of look at where are you now?

Mm.

Where have you come from across all these different years?

How are you bringing all that into this new season, into these really awesome

projects with all of the new hosts?

Co-hosts so are you ready to dive?

Ready?

Ready?

Well, let's start with some of the basics, right?

We've known that you've traveled around a lot.

So where are you now?

Who are you hanging with?

Tell us all about your family and sort of the current place

that you are in right now.

Okay, awesome.

Yeah, we actually right now are in Mexico, which we are loving and we're

in a little town called San Miguel de Y day, which is kind of in the mountain.

So not near the beach it's in, you know, in kind of the mountain, sort

of in the middle, the heart of Mexico.

And.

Really gorgeous here.

Like the weather is absolutely amazing, especially after going to Texas for a

brief, you know, week or two recently, we're like, we love our weather.

It's like, you know, maybe high of 80, you know, and then the, it cools

down at night and there's just so much beautiful, like blue sky most of the time.

So we, we kind of have this journey and I think a lot of people,

especially listeners from the old podcast, We'll think and, and be

like, wasn't she going to Portugal?

Wasn't she going to Europe?

And we were, we were like on our way to Portugal.

And two weeks before we were about to head on a plane, we made this amazing decision

that Europe just didn't feel quite right with everything that was happening there.

Energetically.

And we were like, okay, well we have two weeks.

We gotta go somewhere.

Where, where do we wanna go?

And so we kind of made this pivot and ended up in.

Mexico.

And so, yes, I know.

And so that's where we are right now.

And.

And we've really enjoyed it.

I'm here with my family.

So I've got a 20 year old daughter and I've got a seven year old

daughter who's almost eight.

And so, you know, we are kind of navigating with them and I

have my husband here as well.

And so, yeah, we're just kind of enjoying being in a very different

environment, a very different.

I don't know, it's energetic, right?

Everywhere you travel everywhere, you kind of reside.

It has this different, energetic blueprint in this town.

And Mexico has a very different, energetic blueprint that I'm

really resonating with right now.

And we, we quite love.

Hmm.

I love that.

As I'm listening to you talk about it, I'm just reflecting on, you know, what a

no nomadic path that you have chosen very intentionally for you and your family.

So I'm curious about like, what does that say about you?

What do you think that, that.

Is representative of like your personality and like the things, you know, that when

people describe you, they're like, yep.

That makes sense.

yeah.

You know,

what do you think?

Yeah, it's so interesting.

It's so interesting because I go back in these cycles, like I'm

probably gonna talk a lot about.

Cycles today, cuz I'm a very kind of cyclical person, right?

A lot of death and rebirth.

That's a very like prominent theme in my life.

And, and I think there is also this cyclical of like travel and then stability

and then travel and then stability.

I, I don't like getting to, I don't know what you say.

Like I don't like getting too comfortable in any place.

And so I've traveled a lot.

I've moved a lot.

I really enjoy.

New things, new experiences.

They, they shift my mindset and they help me to look at everything in a new light.

And that's a very important kind of theme for my life.

Right.

That rebirth that transformation.

I feel like there's so much of me that is rooted in that piece.

And so go, going to a new place, try moving to a new place, traveling,

experiencing new things that all really adds to that theme for me.

And.

I find that then I crave little stability.

So it's like this, you know, this back and forth of, you know,

stability and then rebirth again and some change of transformation

and then a little stability.

So we thought we would travel a lot more.

Like we were planning to be more fully nomad.

We were gonna go to Portugal.

We were gonna maybe travel around Europe for a while.

And as we've come to this little town in Mexico, you know, I'm

really craving a bit more stability.

So we know we're gonna stay here for a couple years.

We really like this space.

I feel like I need some space to kind of root into more of

who I am in my life's work.

Right.

And that's the thing is that when you're traveling or nomadic.

There's a lot of change and I love that and it takes a lot of energy

to navigate that change, right.

Navigating uncertainty, navigating change.

And, and so there's like this, this cycle of, of energy towards navigating change.

And right now I'm moving into this cycle of internal work, right.

The cycle of internal self exploration.

And, and so then I need stability during those times because I can't navigate both

the inner and the outer at the same time.

So I think that's this, you know, kind of share some of why all of this is very.

To my journey

yes, absolutely.

And I, I think it's really beautiful because the way that you're designing

your life, there's a lot of alignment.

Like you're saying between just sort of your gravitation towards cycles

and like a deeper understanding and, and a real stepping in

kind of an embodiment of cycles.

And then you're doing that through the cycle of, of moving uproot.

And then settling, arriving, rooting down again and then uprooting.

So there's this beautiful ebb and flow that you're literally not just thinking,

talking about, but you're living it.

And, and there is something about traveling outside of our, you know, even

just like traveling into new countries, new cultures, it helps you see things

about yourself that you may not.

Understood as clearly before a

hundred percent

Laura Shook-Guzman:

really, really love it.

And you absorb the energetic frequency in a new place.

Right.

And you know, one of the things I've talked a little bit about

in terms of Mexico is it's a very feminine country, really?

And the pace is more slow and you know, and some people that that's

very frustrating, they want a more fast pace, but this is actually the

energy frequency I need right now.

And I think my family needs.

And so, and there's family and connection is very important here.

And so you, you know, when you move to a new place, you get to absorb

those frequencies, those that, that sort of energetic blueprint, and it

becomes something that, you know, you get to embody and carry with you.

So if you, you don't stay somewhere forever, you still

carry that blueprint with you.

And I think that's, what's so interesting about traveling and

experiencing some, a new place.

Yes.

Yes.

So when you're thinking about those different cycles and those pivots in

your life, you know, do you have a few moments that you really feel that

you've learned that something from.

A really significant shift or energetic change, or, you know, what's some,

some pivots that would help the listeners understand a little bit

about where, how did you get to where you are today and how you're thinking

and conceiving of yourself and, and the work that you do in the world.

Yeah, it's so interesting cuz I, I kind of did a bunch of journaling,

which again is very me, you know, in, in sort of exploring what is sort of

these pivotal moments and in particular around this idea of reclaiming ourselves.

Right.

Because, you know, I wanted to, I, I wanted to create this podcast

as a very important topic for me and I wanted to understand, well,

what is my relationship to it?

What, when have I reclaimed myself?

What does that look like?

What does that feel like?

What does that taste like?

And for me, it was interesting because so much of like reclaiming myself came

at a point when I had to leave something.

Right.

So there's this, you know, breaking away from something that allowed me,

maybe the space, the time, the aha moments to really reclaim myself.

And so, you know, I've always really resonated and if, you know, TEEX or

whatever, there's the burning tower.

Right.

And I always have really resonated with that card because I feel like

that's such a theme in my life.

It's like the tower.

Everything burns down to the ground and then I can rebirth myself.

Right.

And so for me, reclaiming myself has been a lot of rebirthing and,

you know, and, and some of that it's like where I've left relationships.

Right.

I can really kind of, especially early on in my life, like.

I had a very sort of intense relationship where I was with someone for four years.

And, you know, I really loved him.

He really loved me.

It was this really beautiful relationship, but the life I wanted, right.

Like I had this moment of recognizing that he was kind of on this track

for a very normal life, right.

Like house in the suburb.

Golfing, you know, kind of this normal life and that's all good.

But for me, I realized like I was really needing a life of discovery.

I, I needed to know who I was.

I needed to understand.

I was like about 20 at this point.

And so, you know, I had been in this relationship, I was in

college, you know, I was kind.

In these structures that were very normal.

And I started to, to feel dissatisfied with it all and realized like

I needed adventure, I needed travel, I needed new experiences.

I needed to figure out who I was, you know?

And, and so I broke away from that relationship.

And that really set me on this amazing course of reclaiming myself, like so much

self discovery, you know, I was alone.

I was, you know, kind of, I moved out into, you know, a house with a roommate.

I, you know, changed jobs.

Like I kind of like started to really.

Figure out who I was and allow life to unfold.

Right.

There was a lot more spontaneity.

There was a lot more of an experience.

So that was a really important time in my life.

Like I often call the years after that kind of my fairy years, because it was,

it was the first time I'd given myself to.

Follow what was right for me right.

Every time before that it was about kind of like making my family happy and, you

know, taking care of my mom or my sister or my friends, or, you know, was my whole

life had been about how do I serve others?

How do I fit in?

How do I make everybody happy?

You know, and so this was the first time that it was just all about me and how can

I make myself happy and what do I need?

And it was very painful time, as much as it was a joyous time.

And I think, you know, maybe that's part of that cycle as well, right.

Is like, you know, that depth of pain really kind of creates that depth of joy.

And so there's just this beautiful kind of life experience.

And so that was my first taste of that.

It was a pretty, pretty important time.

, you know, kind of another cycle of that time was when I left my first husband.

So, you know, there's these, you know, it doesn't have to be, so just, just for

the listeners, you don't have to leave someone in order to reclaim yourself.

Right.

That's just what was right for me at that time, you know, as I've matured

and grown, I realize I can do things within relationship, but at those

times I really needed to break away.

But my first husband.

I've shared a little bit of my story in other places around this, but, you know,

he was an alcoholic and a drug addict.

I didn't really understand that when we first met, he was sober.

I didn't really, you know, I was like 24.

I didn't really have that kind of depth of understanding of their cycles.

Right.

Alcoholic cycles or, you know, kind of drug addiction, how that works.

And so, you know, I loved him.

I married.

I tried to save him.

That's a very big pattern of mine, you know, that I've integrated, worked on

for decades and it was very intense.

And I lost myself a lot in that relationship.

And then, you know, I had a child, I was trying to navigate

motherhood without any support from family or friends or my husband.

And.

And so it was just a really, really challenging time.

And I feel like so much of who I was kind of got lost in that process.

And when I broke away from my husband at the time, because he was really

falling into that, you know, drug addiction and that part of the cycle.

And I, it was just too much for me and my child.

It.

Really interesting because I, you know, talk about the tower burning.

I really lost everything.

Like my husband trashed my home and I couldn't repair it, you

know, and had to kind of leave it in the middle of the night.

Like there was just some really interesting experiences I had and,

and so kind of my whole life literally burned to the ground at that point.

And I had to find out who I was, I had to reclaim a piece of myself.

I had to start a new cycle.

I had to rebirth myself.

And so that was just such an intense period.

And yet, like, I feel like I really recognize my resiliency and my strength

and how important it was for me not to lose myself like that ever again.

you know, and I haven't at least at.

You know, if that amount of it, you know, I think, you know, I think all

of us go through cycles of this kind of, you know, rebirth and, and also

remembering and reclaiming who we are and then forgetting again, right.

Remembering and forgetting.

And so I'd say that those were.

Two of the times that, you know, were sort of pivotal in this cycle that I've

experienced many times in my life, but you know, really allowed me to reclaim myself.

And I think it's not leaving the relationships that was

sort of the thing to focus on.

Right.

It was choosing myself, right.

It was choosing myself.

And in those relationships, I had to leave that to choose myself.

I don't think we have to do that all the time.

So

yes.

And I just, I love that you use the, the word remembering, you know, because

that's feels very close to reclaiming, you know, and sometimes the remembering.

Comes first because to remember, like there's a self in here mm-hmm that needs

care that needs to separate from, or set up, you know, set boundaries or be

able to self, I have self preservation.

It's like remembering those needs, remembering the self and being able

then to reclaim, okay, what are these parts of me that I've neglected or

minimized, or in some cases betrayed, you know, parts of ourselves that

we've betrayed that we have to.

To repair with

and yeah, I think betrayal is something we're gonna

talk a lot about this season for sure.

Mm-hmm yeah.

So I really appreciate those, you know, vulnerable shares.

It's like, those are the stories that shape so much of who we are.

In our life's work.

And so you've mentioned that you've, you've used that term life's work.

So how would you define that right now at this stage, in your career?

Looking back, maybe even giving the listeners a little bit of an overview

of the, of the career, but also just then what is this defining moment

that you find yourself in right now?

Yeah.

I love that.

I'll start with my background.

And I actually have to go back to my childhood to sort of like talk about

my background because I think I read my first self development book at nine.

It was called positive solitude.

Right.

And I think that really defines so tight.

I love it.

Right.

It really defines where I was at that point.

I was a very introverted child.

Although I played the game, played whatever game anyone needed.

Right.

I was, I was there.

I was supporting others.

I was always kind of there, but internally I had this, this very big.

Questioning curiosity.

I always was exploring things and I was incredibly interested about human

behavior and motivation and psychology people really talked to me you know,

honestly way too much when I was a young child, it was like, Someone would

sit down next to me and they would just tell me their whole life story.

And I would hear all their secrets and, you know, somehow I have

that vibration about me that feel people who feel comfortable to open

up, which is a gift, although I didn't see it that way as a child.

And so, you know, I think that kind of tells a lot about me and as I'm.

as I grew up, I was quite interested in psychology.

It was always something I was studying and interested in.

And even in high school, I took a, a college level like psychology

class because I just loved it.

And then I went to college and I studied psychology.

And about halfway through, I realized that I didn't wanna teach psychology and

I didn't wanna be a normal psychologist.

And I was like, oh, what am I gonna do?

You know?

Cause I'm quite interested in psychology, but this isn't the path I wanna go.

And so I gave myself permission actually.

And I think this is a pivotal piece because I don't feel like

we do this enough in our lives.

I gave myself permission to take an entire semester of random subjects in college,

whatever interested me, whatever I was curious about, you know, and, and I just

wanted to try, because I didn't wanna get stuck in a, you know, career that I hated.

And so one of the classes I tried was advertising.

And I realized, Ooh, there's a lot of psychology in advertising.

Okay.

I'm gonna try that.

And so I went on to kind of graduate and get a degree in journalism

and advertising and marketing.

and so, yeah, it kind of started me on this business path, right.

To, you know, I, I mean, my parents were entrepreneurs, both of them as well.

And so, you know, I kind of had that, that history, but I never even thought

of going into business for myself, but I found myself in an advertising agency

that was kind of my, my first real job.

And in that process, it was really interesting because this agency

was very toxic workplace was.

Sexist workplace.

Right.

So I had kind of all these like interesting experiences.

And in, in like, you know, 10 months I had done like four years worth of work.

I had won a lot of awards and, you know, I mean, this is like my first real job.

And it was like 10 months.

Right.

So the, the sort of person that I worked with in there was another young woman

and, and we decided, you know, what.

Toxic environment.

Isn't a place for us.

Let's just start our own branding agency.

Right.

and we were like young whipper snappers.

Right?

We have no idea like what we're doing, who we are, how the hell to run a business.

Right.

It was a serious, serious education, but we did, we leaped out.

We started a branding business.

And, you know, for me, sort of the core of what I did in that branding business

was try to pull out the essence of people.

Right?

I was, you know, I used all that psychology, all that understanding

of human behavior to look at the business owner and help describe

who they were, what their mission was, what their vision was.

Right.

And I loved that process and it gave me just this amazing.

I, I ran that company for five years.

It gave me this amazing kind of experience in business, you know,

entrepreneurism, but I got to use all that kind of psychology and those pieces.

And through that process, I became kind of disillusioned

with advertising and marketing.

And sort of like the manipulation and just the, just the way that field runs.

And I started to get really interested in working with the business owners.

I thought, wow, there's so much they're navigating.

Right.

And I'm sure Laura can relate to this.

And you'll hear more about this in her interview as well.

But you know, there's so much that they're dealing with psych.

The issues that they're facing in their business are often not

even related to their business.

They're actually related to their internal development

what's happening inside of them.

And so that became just this obsession, this, this passion of mine to, to

study everything I could about this psychology and the, the behavior

and the motivation, and sort of understanding what makes us tick.

And that's something I was just always interested in and I applied that.

And I applied that to business owners.

And so I became a coach and pretty much I did that for a long, long time.

I've been basically been an entrepreneur for 22 years.

I've gotten the opportunity to work with thousands of leaders in both

corporate and business environments.

And so I've, I've sort of been, you know, in the inner world of many, many leaders.

And it's allowed me to understand that so much of our blocks success really have

nothing to do with the outside world.

The things we're doing or not doing the goals we're achieving or not achieving.

It's like there's all the internal processes that are

stopping us and self-development.

Is something I've not only done through all of the work that I've done in

my coaching and working with others.

It's also what I've done in myself.

I've done so much, self-development work, you know, since I was young,

especially picked up in my twenties.

And so I've applied all that to my work.

And I, I, I love it because.

You know, in, in the thousands of people I've worked with over 22 years, I've

just, I learned stuff and I apply it.

Right.

And so I've been able to test all of these things.

And over that time, I've really developed my own processes and my own ways of,

you know, kind of navigating obstacles and what we're facing in leadership.

So all that said , I, I made a very big change last year.

And for those people who followed me and known me and you know, maybe not, not

yet know the changes that I've made, but.

Last year, it, something I've been sitting with for quite a few years is that my

interest, my passion, and for anyone who's worked with me, they're gonna know this

right away is in the self work, right?

It's in the self development.

It's, it's helping people understand who they are and how they operate

and the psychology of that and how we can sort of move past our obstacles

and how we can reclaim ourselves.

Right.

Reclaiming ourselves as a big piece of my work and.

It was very kind of distorted at times by working with businesses.

Right?

So I was a business coach for a long time.

I was kind of boxed into this sort of business coaching structure, even

though people would come to me for business, we'd do all the self work.

And I made sure there was those alignments, but still everybody

wanted to work on their.

Right.

It was, it's still this like really interesting process of, you know.

Okay.

That's great.

I agree.

I'm dealing with shame and fear, but, but I just need to

know how to market my business.

Right?

Like it was a, so it was this like for me, right.

It was a, it was this constant conflict.

And I was like, but I, I wanna work on the self because that's where the issues are.

That's where everything's gonna unfold.

That's the ripple effect.

And I was still often being pulled towards sales and marketing

and, and all of those things.

And, and, and so for, for actually, if I'm really honest for.

Quite a long time.

I think, you know, when, when we were moving, when we were going nomadic

again, last year, I went through a lot of old, old journals, like to, that I had.

And even 10 years ago it was like, I think I should take my business coaching

hat off and and I still didn't.

And so last year, I made this decision that I needed to focus on my life's work,

which is in the personal development realm and the self-development realm.

And I I'm, you know, it was very hard decision to take off

that business coaching hat.

And I think because the way I teach business, the world needs to be

honest, mm-hmm , you know, and it.

But it's not my joy and it's not my passion.

And, and so it, it took a lot, but it was a really, really important

pivotal decision to focus all my work in the self-development realm

and to let go of the business.

Teachings and all of the things related to business.

So I still work with business owners.

I still work with people in leadership, but I work around the

topics that are more internal.

And so now I'm, I absolutely love it.

I I'm actually doing a lot of.

Speaking.

So, you know, that's something I've always done events and speaking.

I've never highlighted it or focused on it quite in the way I am now,

but I've done, you know, I think 700 plus events over the years, right.

I've done a lot of events and now I'm doing a lot of speaking in corporate

environments on emotional intelligence, on energy management, on transformational

leadership, on women's empowerment and.

I'm seeing how important it is right now that we're planting these seeds,

particularly around emotional intelligence and as Laura and I will talk a lot

about whole body intelligence, right?

Emotional and somatic intelligence that this.

Intelligence in our bodies, this understanding of who we are,

this embracing our emotions, even understanding what emotions are.

These are such important topics that we need to be bringing out in the world, in

our leadership and in our organizations.

And so that's a lot of what I'm doing now.

I still do some coaching groups here and there.

I still do a few one on one retreats a year in Mexico, which are pretty

amazing, but that's, that's where my focus is a lot on the corporate speaking.

And it's so wonderful to be talking about the things that matter, you

know, and not to say that business isn't wonderful and that sales and

marketing isn't necessary, but the stuff that really matters is how we're.

Operating right.

And who we are.

Right.

So the reclaiming ourselves for me, you know, I kind of,

I've done three podcasts, so.

Laura.

And I, we, we did, you know, women in the business arena.

I created one season of a podcast called the feminine lens and you

know, we've Laura and I have been podcasting for almost six years now.

So I wanted to let go of the business.

One women in the business arena, which is incredibly successful.

And it was a really hard decision to let it go.

But I needed to take off that business hat a hundred percent.

And so, you know, as I was exploring, what could we do?

Cause I love podcasting.

I realized that at the core of everything I've ever taught, right?

The core of my life's work is this piece about reclaiming ourselves.

And that's what led the inspiration to, to kind of create this podcast.

And I knew that I wanted to pull in people who.

First of all I know have reclaimed themselves are, you know, at least

a lot, a lot of different pieces of themselves and who could talk to these

different threads around what this topic really means, because this is

such an important piece until we reclaim ourselves, we can't really rebalance

our lives until we reclaim ourselves.

We can't really experience joy until we reclaim ourselves.

We can't do our life's work until we reclaim ourselves.

We can't embrace our purpose.

Right.

Really at the thread of every single thing we want in our lives

deeply and passionately reclaiming ourselves as the first step.

And so, you know, that's kind of, you know, how I wound here was through all

this experience as I was starting to look at what have I learned, right.

What have I seen in all the people that I've worked with and reclaiming

ourselves as a really core piece?

And so just to kind of wrap it up, Laura, what you were asking me about

my life's work, and I feel like.

I've called it many different things, but at the core of it, it really is

about helping people reclaim themselves.

And that means really seeing who they are, right.

Not who they should be or who they could be, but who they already are.

And there's many different threads of things I've talked about over the years.

Like, you know, you are worthy just by breathing.

See, you are already worth.

And so we just have to reclaim that we have to reclaim our work.

It's already there.

We don't have to do anything to become worthy or embracing our feminine

power is a key part of this as well, because when we're reclaiming

ourselves, it is a lot about surrender.

It is a lot about letting go.

It is a lot about some of those feminine tools that we don't

always understand or talk about.

And in my corporate work, I talk a lot about bringing

humanity back into leadership.

Because it is embracing the fullness of who we are, our messy cells, all

of our emotions, our anger and our sadness and our happiness and our joy.

Like when we embrace all of who we are at all of what makes us human

that's when we really start to change the world and, and transform things.

And so I think that is really kind of the core of my life's work.

Yes.

Yes.

And as you talk about it, I mean, I can just feel.

And see the passion that you bring in to this stage of your career.

It sounds like there's a synthesis of experience, lived experience, you

know, you're taking all of it and, and really bringing it into service

with your clients in a whole new way.

And that takes a lot of courage to step away from an old identity.

So.

Yeah.

So I'm gonna ask you a little juicy question here.

Okay.

Juicy question fire.

. Laura Shook-Guzman: So I'm curious,

really important aspects that we have to reclaim in general.

You know, people reclaiming things that are their birthright

reclaiming, certain things that they've always had, but they've maybe

forgotten sense of worth and value.

So I'm curious if you would share with us today and the listeners, you

know, what have you really had to give yourself permission to reclaim.

In order to make this transition.

Yeah.

And it's a good one.

So I say it's juicy, cuz I love it.

You know, kinda like going in, but it's like, what if you were to name it?

Like what do you think you've had to really give yourself permission

to reclaim in order to do that?

Yeah.

There's so many different little pieces, right?

So I've reclaimed so much over the years and, and it's been such this

constant process of forgetting and remembering, as I mentioned before,

mm-hmm I feel like I've had to reclaim.

Selfishness mm-hmm in a way, right?

Like good, empowered.

Beautiful selfishness because most of my life I've spent serving others and,

you know, and that was very much a, a pattern I learned from my mother.

It was very much a pattern we learned in society as women, you know, it,

you know, it's about supporting others and serving others and.

You know, I think wearing my business coaching count for

so long was also about that.

It was about, you know, people need me, people need this

work that I've, I've done.

Like, you know, people get benefit from it.

You know, it was all this thinking about others.

And I can't, I can't let that go.

And so this was in a way, a very big selfishness and,

and for my family too, right.

Because I made good money being a business.

It's a in, in, it's not that it's more accessible money, but there's

something that people, people are willing to invest more in their

business than they are themselves.

Right.

As a whole thing, we could talk about that thread, but you know, it was also.

Pivoting so dramatically, cuz really like my whole identity for years has

been rooted in that, in that business coaching side is, it was a very big change

financially, a big change, energetically, a big, I mean on so many levels.

And so.

It was something I had to do for myself and ultimately the world.

Right.

but I had to do it for myself first.

And so I feel like I really reclaimed sort of this responsible

selfishness and, you know, it was.

It was really good.

And, and I had to reclaim what I'm really passionate about because I can

weave my passion into lots of areas.

Right.

And I know, you know this too, and anyone who's been a longtime

entrepreneur, they will have fit themselves into different boxes.

Right.

Cuz we do, we kind of, we're able to flow in all these, oh, well this is relevant.

This is what I love to do.

But this is also what's relevant to the world.

This is where we can help.

Oh, here's a gap.

We can fill it.

Where's all these pieces that were.

That we, we see and we do, you know, trying to, to help the

world and change the world and make the world a better place.

And, and that's kind of the core of our motivation, but being able

to reclaim what really matters to me, all that matters to me, not

wrapped in a pretty package that the.

that was really powerful.

And I still feel like I'm on that journey.

Like mm-hmm, , you know, there's a lot of years of default I'm having to let

go of, and you know, sometimes I, I was saying recently a couple months ago,

it was like, sometimes I wake up and I still feel this heaviness, right.

That I used to feel because I'm doing something that's important,

but not something that is fully me.

and when I have that aha moment of like, Ooh, I don't have to do

anything today, except what I love.

It is such joy.

It is such a relief.

Yes.

So, you know, that's, that's something really important that I've had to reclaim.

Yes, yes, yes.

And I, I'm gonna hold onto this phrase that you used responsible selfishness.

Yes.

Yes.

And, and that's exactly what I was curious about is, you know, what is it

that you had to kind of dig in deep and, and it's, it takes a lot of courage in.

Culture.

We, we have very much condition tendencies to serve at the cost

of ourselves, especially women.

And this culture is about being rewarded for being tuned in being empathic

and being, you know, the caregiver.

And we don't get a lot of accolades as far as financial rewards for that

is a lot of unpaid emotional labor going on, but there is so much wrapped

up in our worth as perceived from.

The cultural view.

So I love what you're saying is that to be just self centered in a very

empowering way mm-hmm and you know, there's more and more research about

self-compassion self connection.

Mm-hmm that, that is a way in which we thrive as an individual human being.

It's like firing all the right places in the brain and getting us the

health and wellbeing that we need, because why, because then we serve.

And that's what you said is that you said, well, I've gotta serve

self in order to serve the world.

That's right.

And, you know, what's really interesting is because, you know, this is a, I'm

constantly in development, right.

so, you know, work in process, right.

Work in process.

Right?

So on, on therapy, healing, exploration, you know, all the

above, I'm always doing it.

And recently I was, I really had this awareness, cause my therapist

was asking me, have you ever served from a place of optimum energy?

And I was like, Honestly, no, like, you know, and so it's interesting

that my norm is depletion, right.

You know, energy depletion.

And so, and this is, you know, this is a topic I talk about.

Cause it's a topic I know really well.

Right.

I teach energy management because I have worked on this in myself

for decades and with others.

And it's a constant work in progress.

There's so many ways we're taught to deplete our energy.

And we're taught to serve and, you know, self last.

And I love what you said earlier, because I also teach a lot

about the self coming first.

Like when I'm teaching emotional intelligence, a lot of people

are more interested in how, how do you have empathy for others?

We can't have empathy for others.

If you don't have empathy for yourself.

You can't have compassion for others.

Not real compassion.

If you don't have compassion for yourself, you can't have nonjudgment for others.

If you don't have nonjudgment for yourself, everything starts with the self.

And, you know, selfishness is the same.

Like we have to, we have to pull back in that self-centeredness so that we

can heal so that we can understand how we function at optimal level.

And then from all those places we're able to serve in such a higher

vibration in such a better way in such a, you know, more surfaceable way.

And I think, and I think we struggle with this in families, right?

Like, And I know this, like, I, I feel like I've nailed a lot of things outside,

you know, still working on the family but you know, we serve the family first.

We make sure our kids are well.

We make sure our husband's well, we make sure, you know, all the

things are handled and then we give ourselves something last and, you

know, you know, to kind of talking about something else I've reclaimed.

One of the things I've reclaimed about myself.

And it's more right now in the knowing phase rather than the practicing phase.

But I had to reclaim that I need a massive amount of space and

time alone, like massive, right?

Like, I don't know.

I think it's more than average, but you know, I don't know.

Maybe no, one's honest with themselves that how much they need.

I need dedicated time where I am not managing.

Or anything else.

And I can just self explore.

I can do nothing.

I can, you know, read a book all day.

I can, you know, like I need massive amounts of that time

to get at my optimal level.

And it's really hard to carve that out.

Right.

It's really hard to create that in the society that we have in the ways

that the world functions, even in the ways that our family functions.

and so, you know, it's this really interesting piece of like, I've started

to reclaim that, to understand that, and then I'm still in practice with trying

to create enough of that in my life.

But I think that's a really important piece too.

Mm

yes.

Yes, yes.

Okay.

So for those that are listening kind of to move from the, the, the theoretical

to a little more pragmatic, you know, how would someone that's listening

recognize that they need this level.

Of reclaiming that they, that they would need to work with you.

And what does that even look like?

Yeah.

So I think that.

I'm really big on trusting your gut right.

And trusting the, a feeling.

So I feel like when people listen to me and they know they're ready to work with

me, there's a, there's a feeling there's a, there's something that pulls them.

But oftentimes some of the circumstances are.

They're feeling blocks in their world in what they wanna create.

And of course, a lot of people, when you look at sort of this, the topic of this

conversation that we're having you, so reclaiming ourselves, you know, they're

feeling disconnected to who they are.

Are they struggle to tap into what their mission is or purposes, or

maybe they've remembered in the past.

And.

Forgotten again in their current circumstances.

And so I feel like at the core of the people who wanna work

with me, there's this desire to know themselves again, right.

This desire to understand how they work and operate and how to craft

their life in a way that really is aligned with who they are.

So much of the work I did, even the business work was.

About helping people reclaim themselves.

Like, there's this process that I created where it's like reclaiming self and we're

like, Ooh, there's a piece of myself.

Oh, this is who I actually am.

Yay.

And then we have to realign our life.

I call it resynchronization mm-hmm because, you know, we

are new, we're reclaimed it's different and nothing's gonna quite.

Fit the same.

And so we've gotta kind of reclaim those pieces.

And, and then only when we go through that process a few times, can we step into what

I call embodied leadership, where we're leading from that reclaim self, right?

We're not leading others because we have influence or we're trying to tell

all the people what to do, or even that we're trying to be the example.

I mean, what happens is when we're embodied, we are the example,

but that's not the mission.

The mission is to lead from a place of.

Right.

From a place of understanding who we are shining brightly.

And so I think that that's kind of a, a, a cool piece in

terms of how people resonate.

And in my corporate work, it's really about recognizing that your organization

needs some emotional intelligence, right?

needs some, there needs some care happening in there,

and there's some interest.

In actually shifting the way people are operating, not just coming in

with a nice coat of paint and saying here, let me just teach you about

something that no one's gonna integrate the work that I do in corporate, the

speaking and the workshops that I do, they're about creating new awareness.

So, you know, like for instance, I teach about understanding emotions just an hour.

In a workshop where you're learning about what emotions even are and how important

they are and how to embrace them.

It changes the dynamic in the workplace.

And people have these, these awarenesses that, ah, you know,

that's, what's been going on or that's what's happening to me are.

Oh, wait, I can just embrace it.

I can brace it in myself and others.

Like what does that mean?

And so there's some really cool seeds that can be planted and quite a lot

of transformation that can happen.

So that's my corporate work and in my individual work with leaders, it's

about, you know, wanting to lead fully.

So it's not just about embodied leadership.

It's like wanting a full life as well.

Right.

We're we're so big on separating our work in life and, you know, departmentalizing,

which is truly impossible, but we sure as hell try right to go compartmentalizing.

But what I think most of us want is, is total fulfillment.

Right.

Fulfillment in our life, fulfillment in our work, a better

blend of what that looks like.

And so, you know, that's a, a call to work with leaders who are ready for that.

Oh, well, I don't know about everyone else,

but this conversation has me.

Eager to hear more about where you're going with this conversation,

where we're gonna be going in this conversation with reclaiming ourselves.

And you know, it really struck me that this is definitely a deep dive into.

Self and it's, it's a lot more convenient and easier to focus on.

What's wrong out there and what's going on with the other.

Yes.

It's a lot more vulnerable and takes a lot of courage to examine the self.

And that self awareness is what I hear is a big focus and passion for you is just

illuminating more and more that people can be comfortable in this body of theirs

and in their wholeness and from the self.

Leading from that space things open up in a whole new way and

in a whole new perspective.

So I love that.

Thank you.

Thank you for tying that up.

I know.

And it's I'm like, yes, yes, yes.

So all of you listeners, mark your calendar.

Every podcast is gonna be coming out.

Cause this is gonna be really good.

But before you go, I also just wanna bring it to some fun questions off.

So get a little bit little rapid fire inquiry and the things that, that you do

love things that excite you, delight you.

So what's on your book stand.

What are your favorite books?

Oh gosh.

Like it's so hard when you have to like start contemplating books.

Like there's so many so most everybody who's ever listened to any

of the other podcasts knows that I'm a huge fan of Judith Dirk, right?

Yes.

Who wrote circle of stones and I sit listening to the wind and.

In particular.

I love those books because I think they're one of the few real representations of

what I would call the feminine energy.

Like she describes, well, she describes both the masculine and the feminine

energy, but she, she does it in such this really powerful way that I don't know.

It's.

Embodied it's really palpable and you can really feel it.

And, and I think it's just, it's just this great example.

And no matter how many times I read those books or open those books,

like it's just more and more insight.

Like, it's just really interesting.

And I remember it sat on my shelf for a long time, because I was like,

ah, I don't wanna really run, read.

These stories are, you know, it's kind of old, it's like done in

the nineties, but I, I use it kind of like a Bible these days.

So, you know, it's really powerful.

And, and then something I've been doing and, and Laura and I have talked about

this as well, is like, I really love fiction and I love, I it's like such

a beautiful indulgent day when I can lay in bed and re fiction all day.

And I love fantasy and I love magic.

And Laura it titles.

What is it?

You say like

magical realism,

magical realism.

Yes.

Yes.

And so there's so many great authors and books who do that, but.

One of my favorite books recently, well, in the last year was there's

an author named Amy Harmon and she writes, she, she actually doesn't

usually write magical books.

She writes more historical books, but they're like so emotional and involved

and just, they're just amazing.

She's a really, really amazing writer, but she wrote this one fantasy

book called the bird and the sword.

And.

You know how, like when you have a book, I maybe I'm just the only one who does this,

but I have a book that I love so much.

I don't wanna finish the last chapter because it's like, I don't, I do that.

that's OK, good.

Like, I don't wanna wrap up.

I don't wanna finish.

I just don't.

I don't wanna end.

And so that was one of those books for me, where I think I sat for like

a month with like the last chapter is I'm like, I don't want it to end.

She just writes characters.

In such this emotional and beautiful and empowering ways.

And this particular book was like, About, well, I don't wanna

tell you what it's about because you should just go and read it.

Yes.

I'll have to go read it.

Cause it's on my list now.

Yeah.

But it it's a lot about reclaiming your voice.

Mm.

And so, you know, that's another sort of passionate topic for me, so yeah.

I think, I think that's, that's my book for,

I love that I ruin anyone else, but

I'm, I'm writing that one down.

So what about for listening?

What do you like for music or podcast?

Is that,

yeah, so.

Music.

I really love music and I listen to it all the time and I usually

create my own playlists because there's, I love so much varied music.

Right, right now I'm really into this playlist that I created.

And if you are interested, you can actually find it on Spotify

because I put it out there for

this.

I was gonna ask.

I was like, yeah, you create a playlist.

You better make that public

yeah, I did.

Laura Shook-Guzman:

Sonya, everyone listening.

Laura Shook-Guzman:

She's actually very good at creating music playlists.

Laura Shook-Guzman:

I used to enjoy that when we were working together and living together.

Laura Shook-Guzman:

yes.

And so it's called embodying me and yeah, it's a, it's a very

emotional playlist cuz like the, like one of the, my favorite songs right now is

this song called unveiled and it's by LOA.

And it's just this emotional, like, Oh unveiling.

Right?

It's like there there's a lot of like stripping bear that

I, I quite like in music.

I like when there's these raw vocals or there is, you know,

something that emotionally taps into something that most of us have

experienced, but we don't talk about.

And so that's that this is that playlist it's like, It's the thing that brings me

into my emotions and back into my body.

And I think that's a very powerful place that music can take us to.

Yes.

Yes.

I'm gonna be looking that one up.

So what about favorite TV shows?

Do you have a favorite TV?

I love watching TV shows, like just to say,

like I'm a Netflix binger.

This is, I love doing that in my spare time.

There's so many great TV shows.

I could list like a million, but I just to kind of share sort

of my favorite kind of TV show.

If you've never seen it on Hulu, there's this really great

series called normal people.

And it's done.

I think it's done by an Irish producer.

And so I love slow.

Things right.

Slow TV should slow, slow.

Yeah.

Like that are very intensely focused on relationship.

Right.

Mm-hmm so I like that connection that, you know, relationship I love when

characters are very fully developed and I like when there's quietness.

Right.

I think so many people are scared to do quietness.

I mean, there's all the, you know, everything's about the big

thriller and the, the more intensity and, you know, blow up effects.

And, but when you have someone who can develop a story, In

slowness, it is truly magical.

And that's that show.

And so that kind of shares with you.

Some of my favorite shows are like that.

Yeah.

yes.

All that relationship based that's yeah.

I'm gonna have to, I'm gonna have to watch that one too.

Yeah, that's good.

What about your favorite foods?

So is coffee, a food ha

I think we can put it into a category here.

Favorite food and beverage.

I just edited that.

Okay.

So I love coffee.

I'm a big coffee.

Stop.

I go into a new location.

And the first thing I do is look for the best coffee shops.

Yeah.

It's like, it's a, it's a very important part of my process.

So love coffee and, you know, good coffee is just the best.

I won't drink bad coffee.

So I really am a snob.

I love Mexican food, which is really good to be in Mexico.

you're in a good spot.

oh my God.

Everything I go out, I'm just like, oh, so good.

It's like, you know, all the flavors in this.

Spices and the, so love all of that.

And actually, you know, I've had people ask me in the past, like

if you could only take one food to a, to a desert island, right.

Have you ever been asked that question?

Yes, for me, it's eggs.

Like it's the funniest thing, but I freaking love eggs.

I eat eggs every single morning for breakfast.

I could eat eggs all day.

I never get sick of eggs.

It's like my favorite food.

I know this is all about you right now, but

I have to say it's so funny.

Cause I just told my husband,

I was like, honey, if I ever just need a few things, I need

eggs, tortillas and cheese.

And

I like, that's why you're fine.

If you could, if you look in my fridge right now, there's a ton of.

Bacon tortillas and cheese

. Laura Shook-Guzman: This is why

It was not everyone, but we were roommates for a short time and it was

amazing cause we had very much similar.

So last rapid fire.

What is your favorite indulgence?

Really doing anything by myself.

, I mean, I love people.

I love connection.

I love being around all, all kinds of people, but where

I really truly get energy.

I mean, I really am an introvert is like time by myself.

And the biggest indulgence is like having a day or a couple days, right.

To just make decisions for myself, right.

To not think about what the family.

To not think about what my clients need to not think about what the

world needs, but to literally just be like, I'm not hungry, so I don't have

to worry about food or I am hungry.

So I'm gonna go get some food or, you know what, I just wanna lay in bed

and do literally nothing like that.

Sounds amazing.

That is my favorite indulgence.

That sounds so divine.

Right.

I love it.

And it shouldn't even be an indulgence, right?

Like should be a norm.

Should just be like,

But that's a whole topic

should be what we all get to do, and we're

gonna talk more and more and more.

And so I hope everyone is excited as I am about this season and this

conversation around reclaiming ourselves.

So thank you.

Is there anything else that you wanna add before we go,

just for the listeners to know?

Well, I just have to say, I am so excited about this

podcast and this season, like I have some amazing co-hosts Laura.

The most amazingness.

I mean, like, you know, you all know Laura and you know, so excited to

unravel this topic and I feel like it's truly gonna be an unraveling.

It's already been an unraveling energetically, I think for all

of us who are hosting it, you know, I think all of us feel.

As we've just embarked upon this journey that we are all going through some sort

of unraveling and recreation and rebirth.

And so I really truly invite you in as a listener to allow that energy space

vibration, to, to also sit within you and see what there is to unravel, right.

What there is to rediscover what there is to re.

Because those are the most magical times that we have in, in this

lifetime, in this world and in sort of this place that we, we live in.

And so that's, that's kind of what I would invite you to do.

Mm, well, thank you Sonya, for your time in this conversation.

Thank you.

And I'm looking forward to all the future

conversations to be had me too.

Me too.

And thank you all for listening and we will see you next.

I hope you enjoyed this week's episode of reclaiming ourselves, looking

for a speaker for your organization, or wanna dive deeper into the

process of reclaiming yourself.

I would love an opportunity to work with you.

You can find more about my services, read articles and listen.

All of my podcast episodes@sonyastatman.com.

Have an amazing day.

And thanks for listening.

See you next time.