This is your go-to Podcast, where we help parents navigate the complexities of family life. Hosted by Ali Kessler of Greyson’s Choice, we’ll cover everything from understanding domestic violence to navigating the legal system, finding the right therapists, life hacks, family law, mental health, custody battles, and how to protect children in dangerous situations. 

In this episode of Grey Minds Think Alike, host Ali Kessler speaks with Ramya Shripathi, a certified human potential life coach from India, about rebuilding confidence, finding balance, and healing after trauma. Ramya shares her personal journey from being a people pleaser to a human potential and narcissistic abuse coach. She explains her integrative approach that includes shadow work, somatic recovery, and Reiki. Ramya discusses the challenges of narcissistic abuse, the importance of self-care, and practical tools for survivors to start their healing journey. Tune in to hear insightful conversations on overcoming trauma and empowering yourself.

About Ramya Shripathi:

Ramya Shripathi is a globally recognized Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Support Life Coach and the Founder of ActivateYou, a Bangalore-based life coaching practice with clients across the world.

As a Shadow Alchemist and Healing Rebel, Ramya specializes in guiding survivors of narcissistic abuse through Shadow Work, Inner Child Healing, Somatic Recovery, Reiki, and CPTSD healing. Her integrative approach blends psychology, spirituality and energy work.

Ramya is known for her compassionate yet powerful presence, helping individuals rebuild self-worth, set boundaries, and reclaim their authentic voice. She is also a strong advocate for raising awareness about narcissistic abuse in India, making her a sought-after voice in conversations on trauma recovery, empowerment, and holistic healing.

🌐 Website: www.activateyou.in

About Ali Kessler: Ali Kessler is a writer, marketing professional, passionate parent advocate, and founder of Greyson’s Choice, a 501(c)(3) created to raise awareness about the risk of domestic abuse on children. Greyson’s Choice was founded by Ali Kessler in memory of her sweet, vibrant, and fearless 4.5-year-old son, Greyson, who was murdered by his biological father in a murder-suicide during an unsupervised, court-approved visit in Ft. Lauderdale, FL, in 2021. This came just hours after her petition for a domestic violence injunction was denied by a Broward County judge, citing that the “petitioner has failed to allege any overt acts by the respondent which would constitute domestic violence under Florida Statute.”

Ali’s advocacy efforts culminated in successfully passing Greyson’s Law during the 2023 legislative session. This bill now requires the court to consider threats against ex-partners or spouses when making child visitation and custody determinations in the court, expanding to include the following factors: evidence of domestic violence, whether a parent in the past or currently has reasonable cause to believe that they or a minor child is, or has been in imminent danger of becoming the victim of domestic/sexual violence by the other parent, even if no other legal action has been brought or is currently pending in court.

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Ramya Shripathi Podcast

My guest today is Ramya Shripathi, a certified human potential life coach who helps people transform limiting beliefs and build self-confidence. To step into their true potential. Ramya specializes in guiding survivors of narcissistic abuse through shadow work, inner child healing, somatic recovery, Reiki and CP TSD healing.

So thank you so much for joining us today. I appreciate you sharing your wisdom with our audience. I would just love to just set the stage with, a brief introduction of who you are and what you do, and we'll go from there.

Ramya Shripathi : Sure. Thank you so much Ali. So I'm Ramya ,Shripathi and I'm from India.

And from childhood, I've been a hardcore people pleaser. So I would not speak up. And even if someone crosses my boundaries, I would still be like, yeah, it's okay. It's all right. You know this. This is something that I'm okay to let go. But what actually happened with years of suppressing myself, I started developing some issues with my thyroid gland.

So I realized the impact and the importance of speaking up of the ability to say no to others or to speak up for our own self. And I thought, okay, if I couldn't save my thyroid, I could probably speak about this and create awareness about this so that others could save their organs and not go through this, right?

And I set up my coaching business, which is called Activate.You, and I help clients to recover from something called narcissistic abuse, which is [00:03:00] nothing but psychological abuse, emotional verbal abuse, and also physical abuse. So what else I know else? Yeah. Yeah so what I understand is in society people identify and they openly acknowledge or understand physical abuse, whereas with emotional, psychological, or verbal abuse, it is more like.

Pushed under the carpet and people are told, this is how things are, this is how elders are, this is how parents or in-laws are. You just need to accept it. And I think that years of suppression and not being able to say no to them kind of flares up and it comes out as diseases. So that's the work I do and I help people to overcome it, set boundaries, and start the healing journey.

Ali Kessler: Okay. I know there's many of us that need all of that, so can you just tell me exactly what a human potential life coach is? I guess that's someone that helps you find your potential.

We were asked to pick a niche as a coaching niche, and I come from a HR background. So human potential life coach sounded like, okay, this is the thing that I need to do. Bring out people's human their potential, but a year into being a life coach, I realized there were a lot of people who were coming to me with issues of psychological abuse, which is, I would connect the dots and tell them, we look up something called narcissistic abuse and they'd be like, wow, this is exactly what it is.

So I was. Very interested that, the, there was a dearth of people who understand narcissistic abuse. So then from human potential lab coach, I moved into being a narcissistic abuse coach. So now I'm like, yeah, apart from human potential, I'm a narcissistic abuse coach and a shadow work coach as well.

Ali Kessler: Very good. Now, for listeners who may be new to this, what exactly is shadow work, and how can it help survivors of trauma?

Ali Kessler: okay? And

Ramya Shripathi : he's developed this work to go into our unconscious part of our mind, to dig out the beliefs which are there.

And actually those unconscious beliefs are what drives our behavior. So suppose I'm a people pleaser. It's my belief that if I say no to others, I won't be light. So I need to go down to the root of why I behave that way, or why I don't speak up for myself and start making changes there. So shadow work helps with a set of like questioning, which goes to the root cause, and it helps the clients to uncover and discover their real self, their authentic self.

And there's something called a gold shadow, which is there inside all of us. And we suppress it under layers of trauma, under layers of life experiences. So through shadow work, we can actually uncover that gold shadow. Lovely.

Ali Kessler: So we all have a gold shadow.

Ramya Shripathi : Yeah. Yeah. We all do. We all are special.

Ramya Shripathi : So there are a list of questions which we go through, okay. Yep. In the coaching session. So it goes to the root cause so people are able to see what are the blind spots and what are the limiting beliefs which are holding them back.

And for example, if a person has an issue with being a perfectionist, so we help them to go down to the root cause. And the root cause could be something as simple as they saw a parent who was a perfectionist and they. Created a belief that I also need to be perfect. And if I'm not perfect, then you know I'm not good enough.

So we go down to there's a list of questions for each of those shadows that we hold within us, and we go down and identify and go to the root cause, and then start new beliefs there.

Ali Kessler: All right. Now let's talk about narcissistic - abuse, recovery. What challenges do you see most often in survivors of narcissistic abuse, and how can you help them break free of those patterns?

Ramya Shripathi : Yeah. This is a very, 'cause that's something that I

Ali Kessler: personally went through.

Ramya Shripathi : Yeah,

Ramya Shripathi : Yeah, and I'm truly sorry for what you experienced and I hope nobody ever has to experience losing a child because I think there's no grief deeper than that. I'm truly sorry for your loss and for anybody else who is still in your situation and still trying to navigate. So what I would say is the main thing that is missing in our society is awareness about what is narcissistic abuse.

Because if you go to friends and family, they'll look at the facade, which the narcissist creates in society, right? And they're the most charming, most generous, most likable personalities. So you carry a lot of cognitive dissonance within you to even go and tell someone that, Hey, actually I think I'm being abused.

And while I say this, I also tell my clients that, don't go around diagnosing everybody as a narcissist because, correct. Only psychologists can do that through a diagnosis. But having said that. If somebody is being toxic to you, you will know. Your body will know. Your body will give you that intuition and the red flags, and in fact, I tell a lot of people when you're dating the butterflies in your stomach is not excitement.

This is not imagined. This is not something small. This is not something to just dismiss and invalidate and say every couple has fights. Every marriage has quarrels and issues, right? This is a communication issue. So this is what usually people will tell in society when you try to go and tell them that, Hey, I think there is a problem in this, right?

So there are very few people who will actually sit down with you and say that I hear you. I understand this is difficult, how can I help you? So if I think in society there are more people who are open and supportive instead of being judgmental, that shift will help survivors to come out of it.

Because when they are in a place where they have to keep justifying what's happening, or proving that what they're going through is trauma, right? That retraumatizes them. Sure. Yeah.

Ramya Shripathi : Yeah. So they come and tell me like, what do you think this is? Some of them are aware of the term narcissistic abuse, and they ask me, do you think my husband is a narcissist? Do you think my mother-in-law is a narcissist? Do you think my mother is a narcissist?

So I tell them, look, I'm not gonna diagnose or label. But there's a big difference between somebody who just has a few narcissistic traits. Traits versus a person who has a narcissistic personality disorder. So that is a dark triad, the narcissistic personality disorder, because those people are out to get you and they have a victim, and they're gonna attack only that particular victim.

So the coercive control, the hot and cold behavior, and everything is targeted towards only that one person, right? Whereas a person with grandiose personality and narcissistic traits will be the same with everyone. They won't be like, okay, I'm gonna show off only to that one person, or not to the other person.

And limit interactions. And also if possible, and what about if

Ali Kessler: there's children involved?

Ramya Shripathi : Yeah. So that becomes a very tricky situation. So in fact there's a guy called Carl Knickerbocker, and he is written a book, a lovely book called Parallel Parenting. It's like a color book. Okay. Parallel.

Ali Kessler: Yep.

Ramya Shripathi : Yeah. Yeah.

It's a very good resource for anyone who is navigating, with a narcissistic co-parent. Because what I've seen with my clients is the abuse does not end with divorce. Even after divorce, the abuse continues, and in some cases it even escalates. So in that book, he gives steps on how to deal with such situations and how to set boundaries, how to limit interaction so that you're not constantly being reeled into the narcissist chaos.

Ali Kessler: Yeah, I know all about it. Okay.

Ramya Shripathi : Okay. So yeah so once you do all those, I think you can save yourself to some extent. But I would say sadly the abuse sometimes does not end just for divorce. So it's a long haul.

Ali Kessler: So how do you recommend getting, I, I don't wanna say getting over because you'll never really get over, but how do you work with the trauma after the fact?

Someone like me that obviously, will suffer the rest of my life.

Ramya Shripathi : Yeah. But maybe not

Ali Kessler: someone you know that went through something as tragic as myself, but even if they were in a toxic relationship or some family member, how can they get themselves back to good?

When you experience narcissistic abuse, you are in that constant fight or flight, and your nervous system keeps sending you signals that I'm not safe, right? And all these things are happening to me right now. That grief is still fresh, right? And grief gets stored in the heart and the lungs. So in shadow work, we also have learned that there are certain sounds which help in healing the different emotions which get trapped in different organs.

Okay, so grief and trauma gets stored in the heart and the lungs and the sound to start healing. That is like a snake, his thing, okay? Is this what

Ali Kessler: the somatic healing is?

Ramya Shripathi : Yeah. Yeah. Yes. Yeah. So this is where the somatic healing kicks in. So I teach my clients some of these things. So for example, anger gets stored in your liver, right?

And that's why we stay in a loop of, continuously feeling that we're fight or flight. And the example I give to my clients is it's like literally like you're in a war field and you're not given a break. You are literally just standing there looking for enemies, looking for danger, and you're not given a break.

So your nervous system starts crackling down, right? Yeah. So it needs that sense of safety. So breathwork is very important. So have you heard of Pranayama?

Ali Kessler: No, I haven't. Okay.

Ramya Shripathi : So pranayama is basically like different kinds of breath works, okay? It's about controlling your breath, slowing down your breath, and becoming conscious of our breath.

Right.

Ali Kessler: So like meditation in a way.

Ramya Shripathi : Yeah. Yeah. And calms your system. It sends a signal to your brain that all is well, you are safe now. Because if you're thinking of something traumatic, which happened in the past, your brain does not realize this happened in the past. It makes you.

Because if you're not feeling that safety or calm in your own body, it's very hard to get over it. And there's like another thing, I dunno if you can see my hands.

Ali Kessler: Yes.

Ramya Shripathi : Can you see what I've done? Do you wanna try this

Ali Kessler: inter thumb?

Ramya Shripathi : Yeah. So just inter yeah. Interlace your

Ali Kessler: thumbs and make a little butterfly.

Ramya Shripathi : Yeah. And then tap it on your chest.

Ali Kessler: I'm going the wrong way. Yeah. There we go. But

Ramya Shripathi : Just tap. Okay. How does it feel? Does it feel Yeah. Calming. Yeah. Yeah. So when, whenever you feel your heart racing, whenever you're feeling anxious, so you could do this, or if you don't wanna do this whole drama, you can just tap with one hand, right?

For our

Ramya Shripathi : Anxiety again, it is, first of all, you need to calm the grief, which is there because the grief is what brings out the anxiety. So you can tell the sounds, which is the sound for the lungs and for the heart. The sound is, huh. Just half. Okay. Like a sigh, right? Yep. And, yeah, so just and also just taking like a deep breath in and there's something called box breathing.

Okay? So that's very simple. So you visualize a box in front of you and you count 1, 2, 3, 4, breath in. Then 1, 2, 3, 4. 1, 2, 3, 4, breathe out again. Then 1, 2, 3, 4, breathe in. So you cannot do that. And actually the beauty of doing this, it cuts the overthinking. So anxiety comes from a lot of overthinking, which is happening, right?

Ali Kessler: Very true. Now, what are some other practical tools, for parents or people staying grounded during manipulation or gaslighting or high conflict co-parenting?

Aside from the breathing techniques?

Ramya Shripathi : Yeah. So one thing is so to remember to not engaged. So in fact they not today to not engage. Yeah. So there is a technical DARVO. Are you aware of that?

Ali Kessler: Yes. Someone else spoke about it. Yep.

Ramya Shripathi : Okay, so that is what narcissists do, right? So when you try to bring up an issue, like obviously when you are parenting together, there will be 101 issues to discuss.

Even before you realize instead of holding them accountable for something wrong, they did, you are defending yourself for something that they're accusing you. And sometimes it's even false accusations. So the thing to remember when you're co-parenting with a high conflict parent is do not take the beat.

It's literally a mantra you have to keep telling yourself. So mantra is something that, like a chant. Yeah. Yeah. You keep repeating it. So you need to mentally keep creating that new thought loop that I will not engage with this. Because the example again, I give is pigs like to roll in the mud. We don't need to go enroll in the mud with them.

The pig enjoys it and we feel about it. So yeah, we don't need to teach. No, I learned all of

Ali Kessler: that the hard way because my son's father would send relentless amount of text messages, that were disparaging and whatnot. And, at first I wanted to defend myself. I, wrote back and whatnot.

And then he would always escalate to another level.

Ramya Shripathi : Yeah. Yeah. Because they, they don't like to accept defeat, right? So when you don't take the bait, it is almost like they have to accept defeat because they're not able to get through to you. But you need to in shock, they gotta step it up.

Yeah. Yeah. So I tell my clients, even if you wanna cry, do not cry in front of the narcissist. Do not cry in front of them because it literally gives them that supply, that happiness, right? That kind. That's there's a word for it. Shade. Freud, have you heard of that? Shade? Freud. When you feel.

When someone else is in pain. When someone else is suffering. Yeah.

Ali Kessler: So Dr. Ramani talks about this a little bit. Yeah,

Ramya Shripathi : Yeah. We had her on, she's like a, she's, yeah, she's a god. We just had her on

Ali Kessler: recently, and she talks all about, okay. All that

Ramya Shripathi : yeah.

But what I realized is in India. So there are not too many experts or specialists who can work specifically for narcissistic abuse.

And what my clients tell me is, especially if they go for couples therapy, so the narcissist use uses even couples therapy, at for their own favor. Like they go and pretend with the therapist like, they are good people and they're trying so hard to work on this marriage or relationship, and this person is the unreasonable one.

So there are very few people who are aware. So I would say for people who are going through this, it's okay to therapist shop. It's okay to coach shop. Still, you find the person who gets you, understands you. And it's not just about having a person saying yes. What you're going through is hard.

But it's also a person who is gonna validate your experiences and also show you the way forward. Because a lot of people, a lot of survivors tend to get stuck in a rut, right? And going like on the wheel, they're not able to come out of it. 'Cause the C-P-T-S-D, which I wrote about in my introduction so that means complex post-trauma stress disorder.

And this is something that happens to people who experience chronic abuse. So when a soldier goes to the ward and comes back after one ward. He experiences something called post-trauma stress disorder, which is PTSD because it's after a one time event. But C-P-T-S-D is complex. It's complex post-trauma stress disorder, and most survivors of narcissistic abuse are not diagnosed.

It's really sad that, there's somebody out there who literally just thinks that, they can destroy another person's soul, right? Yeah. And this survival is they

Ali Kessler: did, they certainly did with me. And he knew that the only thing that could ever really hurt me is to hurt my child.

So they succeeded. Yeah. I'm still here, so I'm winning because I refuse to let him have the final say. So that's why we talk about it. Now, why do you think it's so hard to get help? Like maybe through the courts or whatnot? Why is it so hard to get help when you say, oh, this person's a narcissist and he's hurting me.

Okay.

And secondly, in courts, I don't think so many people are aware of the psychological background or what narcissism is all about or how insidious it actually is. So they don't get it. They just think oh, this person is just overly sensitive. Like even if you break down in a court session, right? So the judge may just dismiss you saying that you come back when you're more.

Come and collect. I don't want this drama in my courtroom, right? So nobody's gonna really sit with you. So it's very important to rehearse, to practice what you're gonna say. And to have a lawyer who is very good in understanding high conflict personalities, if not narcissistic, at least they should know how manipulative high conflict personalities are, so that you know you can also strategize.

So that kind of gives your brain a new path, a new way of thinking, because if a survivor thinks of themselves as a victim, they don't move forward. They stay stuck there hoping that somebody would come and save them, but that somebody may never show up. So the somebody who has to save a victim of abuse is the victim themselves, right?

And by identifying as a victim, it's very hard to move forward. So I always recommend or to use the word survivor to, even if clients come to me and call themself a victim, I'm like, no, you're not a victim. You are a survivor. You've survived this. This is something so difficult and so painful and so hard, but you've survived.

Ali Kessler: I'm a firm believer in therapy and I'm sure that, as a life coach, you would work hand in hand with therapists to give the your client, the most potential, as you say. Now, I do know some people that don't like to use the word high conflict because they say the minute you say you're in a high conflict custody battle or a court, whatever, you label it as high conflict and you label yourself as high conflict.

So sometimes you have to choose your wording.

So I think I would say, it depends on, what works. You can see, you can just try it out and see, but definitely don't use the word narcissist.

Ali Kessler: I've heard that before. So I guess many parents also feel like they've lost themselves with court battles or toxic relationships. What are some like first steps that they can do to reclaim their confidence?

Maybe after? Yeah, the fact.

Ramya Shripathi : So the first thing, or the first step, I would say is to rebuild that self-talk that they have. Because what happens in narcissistic abuse is it's almost like a virus that has been downloaded into your system, right? If you look at ourself or a body like a computer, so imagine somebody just comes and puts a virus, right?

I can try harder next time, right? I can do better next time. And also, another thing I tell my clients is to write on a post-it and stick it on their bathroom mirror so that every morning when they brush. Their teeth, they can see a few nice affirmations. Something as simple as, I'm enough, right? I'm worthy, I'm right.

So that is almost like retraining your brain. So these are simple strategies. So I tell them, stick it inside your cupboard. Stick it on a fridge so that it's constantly there reminding you. It's not something just in a journal that, when you open the journal, you're reminding yourself, and this is something which once it becomes a habit, so every time you are in a.

Bad frame of mind, it becomes a habit to fall back on affirmations. So affirmations is something which really have a positive impact. And the important thing about affirmations is it has to be in present tense. It should be positive words. Right?

Ali Kessler: Yeah. I'm also a, believer in self care, doing things to, better, whether it's a massage or even just a manicure, just doing things to take care of you.

Ramya Shripathi : Yeah. That helps a lot. In fact, massage kind of moves the emotions which are trapped in the body. So when we learned reiki, we learned about how, we have an energy body around us. So the soul is seated inside. Then we have this physical body, and then we have an energy body, which is around us.

So when you meet people who have like lower energies, or who are toxic, or who are narcissists, what you'll realize is your energy body interacts with their energy body. Literally, you feel like you're. Energy is draining out, right? It's almost like your battery is drained out and you're irritable, or you're upset, or you're angry and you're not able to understand.

Because if you continue to interact with them, they'll continue to drain and deplete your energy.

Ali Kessler: How does Reiki help with all of that? Can you explain what it is for those that don't know? Yeah.

Ramya Shripathi : Yeah, so again, reiki is to do with the, the healing, the energies, which is around us. So in India we call it as drishti or nazar or somebody casting a bad eye.

I don't know if you've heard of that, right? Yeah. Like some people who may look at you and they be like, oh look, she's so beautiful and she has a beautiful house, and she has a great career. So not everybody has. A good intention when they say that, some of them see it with a bad intent. And that kind of gets trapped in your energy body.

Somatic healing and the body work, the breath work that helps a lot more. Ricky is like a second step. And there's also something called EMDR. Have you come across that? I

Ali Kessler: have. I've been actually told I should maybe try it, but I haven't.

Ramya Shripathi : Yeah. Yeah. So in fact that helps to release a lot of trapped trauma.

And surprisingly, there is a dance form in India called Bar. So where there is an eye movement, which is similar to the eye movement, which they do in EMDR, right? Because ask you to move your eyeball from left to right and left to right and think of a memory which is traumatic, right? And apparently that helps to release the trauma.

And I actually saw, yeah, I've been

Ali Kessler: interested, but I haven't done it. Yeah.

So there are guided videos on how to do it. So there are certain energy meridan points like here, like below the nose, the chin, and below the collar bone. So you can of to tap it. Those points. Yeah. You tap. Close points and you repeat few affirmations. So suppose you have a money block, you tap and say that, although I'm having a difficulty right now, I will get over this money block and, I'm gonna release myself from this and I'm gonna, tap into abundance.

So it's a lot of like a work of affirmation along with activating those energy points in the body.

Ali Kessler: Fascinating. I'm actually going to look up all of this because I am all about, like I said, self-care and feeling, you know the best that I can be. So yeah, I'm gonna look up all that and I will put all of that in the show notes.

Now you started Activate.You - correct?

Ramya Shripathi : Yeah.

Ramya Shripathi : Yeah. Yeah. So it's activating your inner best self.

Ali Kessler: Okay. And can anyone reach out to you?

Ramya Shripathi : Yeah. Yeah. And you do virtual I pay my link, yeah. Yeah. So I have clients across the world. I have clients in New Jersey.

Okay. In California. Yeah. In Dubai, Australia. So most of my clients are across and Okay. And even in India, most of my clients are in other cities. So I do my sessions online. Okay. And a few people who are in Bangalore, where I live I meet them for in-person sessions.

Ali Kessler: Okay, great. I'll put all of that, in the show notes.

One thing I also wanna touch on are like children. So if you're, if you have kids and you're dealing with some sort of toxic relationship, what are some, what are some realistic ways that parents can balance healing working, but also raising their kids and giving modeling resilience so that their kids, are emotionally whole?

Ali Kessler: Parallel. Yeah. So

Ramya Shripathi : he says. Yeah, so he says, do not badmouth the narcissistic parent to the children because the children, even if they see that, okay, this parent is doing something wrong, but they don't like to hear one parent badmouthing the other parent, so you can call out something which is toxic.

You can say, okay, the way you know this person shouted at you was not. The way they dealt with you was not okay. But we should not keep bad mouthing them and say that look, they're a narcissist, right? Don't talk to them or short back at them so that would be a wrong role modeling for the children.

So when we are a healthy parent ourself, when we regulate our emotions. When we don't suppress our emotions, we are assertive. We speak up for ourselves. So children notice that, right? And when they see that, okay, it's only the other parent who is like just going on picking fights. And there's drama always when that other parent is around.

So if we are stable and calm, we become a great role model for our children. And having one healthy parent is actually sometimes good enough because I think society guilt trips you into thinking you need both parents to have a, good home. Otherwise their children are from a broken home.

But I don't agree with that because if the children are able to see one healthy parent and learn good things from one healthy parent, that is good enough and that home is not broken.

Ali Kessler: Very true. Kids are pretty resilient, but it's amazing the things that they do pick up on that you, you wouldn't even think.

They're so smart.

Ramya Shripathi : Yeah. Yeah.

Ali Kessler: It's definitely, a challenge to keep that, away from the child so they don't see it, but also deal with it,

There's bound to be wars, right? So you can't completely shield them from it. But however, you can be that calm parent who you know will be a good role model for them.

Ali Kessler: Yeah. In my case, I didn't even live, I didn't live with Greyson's father and I had to deal, we lived separately and Greyson went back and forth every two days and Okay.

It was hard when he's I don't wanna go. I don't wanna go. And I have to be like, but you have so much fun there. And I had to make him wanna go. And that was challenging for me because I didn't want him to go either.

Ramya Shripathi : Yeah. No, I completely understand that. It's not a good place to be.

And in fact, I know a lot of parents who tell me, clients who tell me that they're, they stay in the marriage because they don't wanna go through that, right? The fact that they'll have to stay separately in two different homes and kind of the children will have to juggle or keep moving between two homes.

Ali Kessler: me too. So if a listener that's listening feels hopeless or stuck right now, what's one small thing that they can do today to start moving forward?

Besides calling you?

Ramya Shripathi : Yeah. So I would say start writing down your thoughts because sometimes when it's all in the head, it's too much to deal with.

Ali Kessler: Sure. And

Ramya Shripathi : sometimes the people in your inner circle may not understand what you're going through. And not everybody can offer therapy or coaching. So the next best thing you can do to help yourself immediately is to start writing down your emotions.

Okay. Journaling. And sometimes even ripping it up. Yeah. Ripping it up. Because that is like an anger release activity. And in fact, surprisingly in Bali, I went to this healing temple. It's called Waterfall Healing Temple. And the name of the temple is Beji Griya.

And then you're supposed to just laugh and laugh and it's like hilarious. I love that. But yeah, by the time I'm done with it, you feel so calm and grounded, right? And you literally feel you've just been. You've just been healed, right? Yeah. I'm told to, to scream

Ali Kessler: in a pillow and just get it out.

Ramya Shripathi : Yeah. Scream, punch, just release it, right? Because emotions is nothing but energy in motion. So we need to release it out from our body. It's only when we hold it in is an issue, so whoever cannot get out or do anything, can try these things at home. Oh, and whoever can go to Bali, I would say, please go visit that temple.

It's amazing. So I would love to go. It's a very good experience. Yeah. I hope it, even crying

Ramya Shripathi : Yeah. Self-soothing. Yeah. That becomes very important, right? Yeah. I think tears are not, they're not weakness. I think tears is a sign of strength and the fact that we're able to self-soothe. So I'm really proud of you for the work that you've been doing and for the way that you're beautifully healing and also trying to help other people around the world and may God bless you.

Ali Kessler: Oh, thank you so much.

Ramya Shripathi : Now,

Ali Kessler: where can listeners

Ramya Shripathi : contact you? So activate. You I have my LinkedIn, my Instagram. Okay.

Ali Kessler: Okay,

Ramya Shripathi : great.

Ali Kessler: Thank you so much for joining us today and sharing such powerful insights on healing and confidence, and I guess reclaiming your voice after trauma.

Same here. We'll be in touch. Alright, sounds good. Have a good day. You too.