Welcome to she coaches coaches. I'm your host, Kandi motsek. And I'm going to help you find the clarity, confidence and courage to become the coach that you are meant to be. If you're a new coach, or if you've always wanted to be a life coach, then this is the place for you. We're going to talk all about mindset and strategies and how to, because step by step only works when you have the clarity, courage and confidence to take action. Let's get started.
Candy Motzek:
Hello, friends, and welcome to this episode of she coaches coaches. This is this third episode in my mini series about confidence. Now, the last time we spoke, we talked about the lies we tell ourselves that hold ourselves back. This time, I've got three things that you need to know about building your confidence. So why do we want confidence anyway? Like, why do we think we need it? Well, it's because it feels good. It feels empowered, and like we can accomplish anything that we set our minds to. So here's your powerful thought for today. A lack of confidence does not mean you're not ready. Last episode, I reminded you that you're far more capable than you know. And this week, I'm offering the thought that a lack of confidence doesn't mean you're not ready. If you like these encouraging thoughts, well, I've got a little treat for you. When you sign up for my free coaches Online Business Academy, you can get all kinds of fun screensaver graphics to use these powerful and inspiring thoughts you can download and use them on your phones homescreen, I find this is a super helpful way to remind myself what thoughts I'm practicing. Because when I do, I think better. And I feel better, I feel way more empowered, and inspired. And then everything is so much easier for me to be effective. And to make progress. I'll put the link to sign up in the shownotes then you can sign up and download those graphics right away. So three things you need to know about confidence. The first, confidence is an emotion, and it rises and falls just like every emotion. It sounds simple, right? Remember the lie that I told you about in the last episode, the one that where we wish we could become confident and stay there forever and ever and ever. When in fact, confidence is an emotion, we're able to shape our emotion. That's right. Emotions don't just happen to us, we can create them with our thoughts. And we can learn to evoke the physical sensation of them in our body. When I think of emotion, I think of waves on the ocean. Sometimes it's just a little ripple. And sometimes those waves are big, but they're always dynamic. And they're always in motion. They come and go, they rise and fall. We think 1000s and 1000s of thoughts each and every day. And most of those thoughts are just on automatic pilot. And knowing this means that we can begin to be aware of how we're thinking and what we're thinking, and how we feel when we think those automatic habit thoughts. If you want a reminder, go back and listen to some of my earlier episodes for a brief overview. I'll put the links in the Episode Notes. The second thing for you to know about confidence is that you can create it on purpose. Yeah, remember, it's variable. Sometimes we have it. Sometimes we don't. Maybe it's easy for you to feel confident in one area of your life, but not another. You feel confident as a parent. I bet when you were a brand new parent you sure didn't. I bet you brought that new baby home for the first time. And you felt completely out of your element.
Candy Motzek:
I remember when I brought my son home all those years ago from the hospital. And I just looked at him and I thought Oh no. What am I supposed to do with you? How will I ever do this? Then with my second it was a breeze. I knew how to tote that little baby around so easy, relaxed. It was a completely different experience. To experience confidence we have to be willing to feel discomfort, sometimes even feel like crap. We might feel nervous, scared, vulnerable, any of those emotions, feeling discomfort is actually part of the process. You don't become confident without moving through the discomfort. And I'm not talking about a little discomfort. Sometimes it's a lot, sometimes it's a little, I always say that we need to use courage. And that courage is not always courage with a capital C, it can be a small, brave step, just the next step, it doesn't have to be a big leap. My guess is that every time you try something new, you don't feel very confident at the start. Well, I'm exactly the same way. But now that I know that I can create confidence using thought work and coaching. And that five see approach that I'm going to tell you about in the next episode, it feels so much more doable. Really, so much more manageable, because I know I have the tools to create it. And so will you. It's all about practice, and putting the steps into action. The third, a lack of confidence does not mean you're not ready. This is not a linear path. You may end the day to day feeling capable. And then wake up tomorrow morning, feeling a you'll move between all the levels throughout the day. And that is normal. Confidence is not bulletproof confidence is not arrogance, believing yourself, not at the expense of others. This is not a competition. This is an inside game. You can't pretend your way to confidence, but you can think yourself to confidence. You can feel yourself to confidence, and you can love yourself to confidence. You think your way by choosing thoughts that feel aligned and powerful. And then you practice them, you integrate them so they become new ingrained habit thoughts, you can feel your way to confidence because your feelings flow from your thoughts. You can love your way to confidence. And this is the part of my approach that is different than some of the heavy male Alpha macho types. Learning to Love. And trust yourself, to have your own back to make a promise to yourself, that you will not be mean to yourself when you're learning. When you treat yourself in this way, you're going to be way more likely to be motivated to try and try again. So that's it for today. Three things little things that I wanted you to know about confidence. The first is that confidence rises and falls just like every other emotion. The second, you can create confidence on purpose. And the third, a lack of confidence doesn't mean that you're not ready. I'm looking forward to sharing my five c confidence formula with you in the next episode. And it's a game changer. So yeah, if you're listening as these episodes drop, make sure to subscribe. And if you're joining me and they're already live, you can line them up and play them one after the other to get all my teachings in this series back to back. Listen, I want you to know that I love my clients. They are high achievers, and I am honored to invite you to be part of my community too. If you're ready to get started, sign up for my free resource library, the coaches Online Business Academy, there is a lot of free help waiting for you right now there. And don't forget to download those inspiring, free screensavers. And if you want even more help, maybe you've had enough of the trial and error the trying to figure it all out on your own. And now you want to work more closely with somebody. Click the link in the Episode Notes to find out how to apply to work with me. I'll be back and speak with you next week.
