Welcome to another impactful episode of The Last 10%! Today, host Dallas Burnett sits down with Stacey Hanke, a renowned executive mentor and communication expert thriving specialist in influence. Stacey shares insights from her journey, including her beginnings in voiceover and work with Fortune 500 companies. They discuss Stacey's upcoming book, 'Influence Elevated,' which explores how influence has evolved over the years and the importance of consistency and authenticity in leadership. Stacey emphasizes the power of body language, messaging, and the importance of practicing communication skills consistently. Whether you’re a leader, coach, or business owner, Stacey’s practical advice on mastering influence and accountability will inspire you to reach your full potential.

Connect with Stacey on her website: https://staceyhankeinc.com/

Connect with Stacey on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/staceyhanke/

Hey everybody.

We're talking to Stacey Hanke today.

What an amazing woman.

She is a renowned executive mentor and communication expert who's transformed the

way leaders connect and influence others with incredible stories from her journey,

including the beginnings in voiceover, her work at fortune 500 companies.

Oh my goodness.

Stacey is a great new friend of mine.

You don't want to miss this incredible conversation.

Welcome to The Last 10%.

Your host, Dallas Burnett, dives into incredible conversations that will inspire

you to finish well and finish strong.

Listen as guests share their journeys and valuable advice on living in The Last 10%.

If you are a leader, a coach, a business owner, or someone looking

to level up, visit TheLast10p.

com You are in the right place.

Remember, you can give 90 percent effort and make it a long way, but it's finding

out how to unlock the last 10 percent that makes all the difference in your

life, your relationships, your work.

Now, here's Dallas.

Welcome.

Welcome.

Welcome.

I am Dallas Burnett sitting in my 1905 Koch brothers barber

chair in thrive studios.

But more importantly today, we have a great guest.

We're talking about influence.

Yes.

All things influenced today, which I know our listeners

are going to be excited about.

Stacey is a hall of fame, professional speaker and

bestselling author known for her powerful model that helps leaders communicate

with confidence and authenticity.

Welcome to the show, Stacey.

my goodness.

Thank you.

How can I top that intro?

You give me that opportunity to motivate myself, to give myself

a 10 percent level up here.

That's awesome.

Well, I am so excited.

We've been excited to have you on the show because this is a topic that I

think our listeners are going to love.

You are an expert on influence and we're talking a lot about before the

show, you've been doing this and this speaking and consulting has been growing

and growing over the last, number of years and you guys are just exploding.

So you actually.

Have an announcement to make because you have a book coming out.

So tell us a little bit about what's going on in your world right now with that.

I do.

And you can relate you being an author as well.

It always is a big announcement when you can say it's actually coming out.

It's really happening.

So book three, it's influence

elevated,

Wow.

connection Monday to Monday.

It's coming out in October.

It's coming out.

Because I can't turn back now.

So the more I know that, and it's a

You've got too much invested.

yeah, exactly.

It's a continuation Dallas of influence, redefine the previous book.

And it

really is four years, four years of research of how influence has

changed and what it really means to elevate your influence Monday to

Monday, which is, this is so exciting.

Cause as I'm listening to.

The intro to your show, we talk about in the book, instead of level up, it's

really elevate in our world, but we talk about 10x'ing everything, playing off

of your less than 10%,

where can you pull in that 10%?

So I think we're gonna have a

good conversation.

We got a lot to talk about.

I know that is so good.

I love the idea of influence.

I remember the first time that I was really was impacted from some

book or thoughts on influence.

I hadn't really thought about it as, as detailed as much, but the

psychology of influence, with, by Caldini was something that was 20

years ago that was exposed to me.

I was, and I read it and I was like.

Oh my gosh.

There's so many things that are going on that I'm not even thinking about all

these things that are influencing me.

And the reason I read it was I'm leading a team and I need to influence them.

And I was looking at and saying, where can I go?

So I'm excited to that your book, influence elevated is coming out.

And I would love to, what you said that influence is changing.

So now, now you've peaked my curiosity.

Tell me a little bit about how influence is changing and how this influence

elevated, how we talk about influence now.

There is so much noise.

Hmm.

There are so many ways that we can connect.

We're more connected now, Dallas, than we ever have, but how are we so disconnected?

I

It's just interesting what's happening.

And when I say noise, It's the multitude of ways that we now can

connect and engage with people

from hybrid to virtual social media and personal list goes on.

That's one set of noise.

And then it's

the noise.

It's all the distractions that are going on in the world

without getting deep into it.

It's politics.

It's diversity.

It's equity.

There's gender differences, right?

There's so much noise.

It's making it more difficult than ever before to stand up from the noise.

So that not only is your message remembered, but you are remembered long

after the conversation has occurred.

Because influence, you don't influence.

Rarely are you going to influence someone on the very first interaction.

It's a series of interactions you have with someone that is consistent.

That's one change.

And because there's so much noise, this whole idea of elevating your

influence, and the book gets into it.

Of course, the book is very practical.

It's very how to of whether you're a, the book is very focused for leadership.

It's focused for

those that are people leaders, and they're really trying to drive change

in the organization, but it's how do you stand out from that noise, whether

you're meeting with your teams in person, Whether they're hybrid, it's

how do you stand out from the noise from clients, those that are interfacing

with internal or external clients.

And then even more than that, when I say Monday to Monday, this is not, I

show up on this interview with you and suddenly I turn it on and I'm at my

best behavior.

How

do you see?

Dallas is how I treat my team.

It's how I communicate with my clients and it's how I communicate my personal life.

So when I say elevate, I look at elevating.

It's this whole nother level.

We've been talking, my team and I have been talking about

how to influence for years.

This elevation.

It's a space that people don't even know exist, and

we're really unpacking of what does that look like?

And that's where the book goes.

It shows you what does this look like?

But then how do you get there?

And I'll tell you, though, a big piece of it is being consistent.

Because if

you're not consistent and people are guessing, which

Stacy's going to show up today.

It's a Monday.

It's a Tuesday.

It's a camera on day, camera off day.

This is about

being consistent.

And when that happens, you and I were talking about it before we start recording

here, that's that level of trust.

Mm,

There

has to be consistency with our body language, our messaging, and how we

show up with all these mediums for people to say, I know what I'm always

going to get when I talk to Dallas

Mm,

and

that's hard to achieve because influence for years has been

known as you have a sales pitch.

Okay, prepare.

No, no, no, no,

no, no.

You should be practicing your communication and how

you show up all the time.

And you should be practicing and enhancing, leveling up

your presence all the time.

That when the stakes are high, well, that's the last thing

you want to be thinking about.

You've got to be thinking

about the client, your

messaging, reading their body language.

So we get pretty deep Dallas With unpacking it.

I always share with a brand new client that has had not exposure to us.

They're like, what is this kind of experience like with you?

And I always compare it to a sport.

And I'll say,

Hey, if you've been playing golf professionally for years, we're coming in

and we're going to take you to a place you didn't even know was possible because your

subconscious just knows you've been good.

You've been good for

so long and everyone keeps telling you how great you are.

We're just going to unpack another level for you.

That's what I love

about your 10%.

That's

finding that it's finding that last little bit that's been locked

away or hidden, that takes a lot of extra intention to get to, I love how

you talk about it because it's very intentional and I love how you describe.

That getting to the next level, because really it's true the way you describe

it, when you're going out on that sales presentation, when you're standing up

to make a speech or you're trying to put your best self forward, I used to coach my

daughters, I have three daughters and we used to coach their soccer for years and

years because it's a little league soccer.

And we were just constantly say, Hey, look, you, you play like you

practice, you play like you practice.

So we're having a bad practice.

Don't expect to go out and show out on Saturday

morning.

And it's like exactly what you're saying is because every day is the practice,

right?

You're every day.

It's not like you go, okay, now I'm going to give a big speech.

Now I'm gonna give a big presentation.

So I've got to prepare for this.

What you're saying is no, no, no, no.

Every day is that preparation every day because they should be the same.

Now, obviously you have to prepare the specifics, but when you talk about being

Right.

and you talk about that consistency, it's not just

doing that on presentation day.

It's literally doing that every day at

work when you come up and show up and you leave people.

I that idea.

you probably could

take this too from the coaching days with your daughters.

My coach always says to me, consistency.

True, true consistency is when you're doing what you say you're

doing and no one's watching.

And there's so many analogies that I use are real life stories of

professional athletes or actors, actresses of how much they practice.

No one sees the practice.

They always

see, Oh, well, they're just gifted.

Right.

No one's born an influential leader.

It's the amount of practice that they put into it.

And here's the great news though, when it comes to how you show up in

your presence, your body language, your messaging, every interaction you

have is an opportunity to practice.

So this isn't me telling your followers what every Tuesday you should

carve out one hour and you should practice your communication skills.

No, no, no, no, no, no.

It's every conversation you have in a day, a week.

That's a lot.

That's just to really add up.

You can practice Something about your body language or your messaging, or maybe

even your listening skills, listening is a big part of influence as well.

You can be practicing all the time so that by the time the high stakes, however

you define that, by the time the high stakes conversation comes up, you're just

at this level of this is who you are.

Yeah.

I love that.

When you think about this concept, and I think this fantastic, however,

I think it's, I think a lot of people don't achieve that level that

you say you don't even know exist.

I think it is true.

I think people have a hard time making that jump as it relates to consistency.

So if I'm a leader, I'm leading a team, I'm leaving a company,

leading an organization.

What are some things that you've seen over your career?

Over your time and helping all these leaders through the years

that they tend to miss or mess up in terms as it relates to consistency.

Because I would think that there's a lot of ways.

we all live in the world and we all have bad days.

We get up and have a flat tire or we, we're not feeling well.

And we have this responsibility to, to build trust and influence others.

So what are some pitfalls that I see as a leader

that would keep me from being consistent that you've seen?

Anytime I work with executives, a question that I'll

ask them after our work, or even at the end of a keynote, I'll ask them.

What is one thing you were not expecting from your time with me that turned out to

be the biggest return on your investment?

Hmm.

And their responses, I had no idea how powerful my body

language and messaging, how powerful it is that they are consistent.

I

never think about what I'm doing with my eyes.

What am I doing with my hands?

It's all about the message.

So that's the biggest piece is the body language and the messaging.

They're so inconsistent with leaders.

And the challenge though, here is if you ask any leader, what kind

of feedback have you received?

good,

Yeah.

great.

And no one's going to tell a CEO unless

that CEO has someone that is really loyal to them.

It's always, that was good.

right.

It's just the nature of your role.

I mean,

the, the biggest thing that the biggest thing you need is the truth.

And the hardest thing, a lot of times to find an organization is true

feedback, especially about yourself, because who wants to be the person

that's, you're signing their check and they're going to come in and

be like, Hey, yo, I got a problem.

You just screwed that up.

You're not going to get that.

not going to get it.

get that.

I was with a group I was working with last year or last year, last week was

the CEO and all of his direct reports.

So we get them all in a room and we get to them point to where

they're giving each other feedback.

And someone in the middle of the whole feedback powwow, they said,

no, one's ever told me this before.

So if you all have been seeing this all along, but no one's ever told me

this, and then everyone said the same thing, who's going to tell you, you are

the president who reports to the CEO.

No one's going to tell you this.

And that's the big piece.

The second one is we're all guilty of it.

I'm included on this one.

Our lack of brevity.

We don't know when to stop talking

Hmm.

we don't have the courage.

Or even sometimes the know how to adapt the message to make sure

it's tapping into our listeners.

Why not?

What we

want.

And that

why Dallas is, you know, why is this conversation happening now?

Why should you care?

Why should it be important to you?

Why is it important to you?

We go into these meetings.

And it's just a checklist.

It's everything I

want to do.

And then we wonder why aren't people turning their cameras on?

Why are people multitasking?

Well,

because you're boring, right?

And

Yeah.

because your message doesn't relate to them.

Yes,

The third

is the

lack of trust through our body language.

Hmm.

Who's ever told us that, if you're looking at people

and you're talking, it is hands down, that's where the trust gets built.

But if those eyes are moving like mine are right now, you

just get people second guessing.

Do I trust what you're saying?

We're

always under surveillance Dallas and the higher up that

you are in an organization, that surveillance is even more

magnified and people are watching.

they want to watch.

How do you lead?

How did you get to that VP position?

And we don't,

and even if you're not a leader, you're still under surveillance.

Here's the great news.

No matter what's going on in your life, you always have control over

your development and you've got control over what is the personal brand.

What's the reputation you want to create?

That's your decision just by how you show up and how you stay

showed up in a conversation.

I think that is, those are all great, man, those are great points.

And I think that's so difficult.

just like leaders not being told, Hey, you've said something

that doesn't make sense.

I think also the brevity piece, it is so difficult.

I think for a lot of leaders and I would, I'm going to include myself in that.

And even if you have, here's what I would say.

Some leaders.

Okay.

I'm going to just tell them what I want them to know because they need to

know this and they go down the list.

Just like you were saying, just going to boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.

And even some leaders that have really good intentions and they go, I really

want to, I want to sell this idea.

I want people to get fired up about it.

I want to do it.

My desire to.

Communicate with clarity to make sure the message that's sent is understood.

Sometimes just, I find myself speaking to a team and I'm like, shut up.

You've said enough, just let them marinate in it.

Anything more, you're just going to overwhelm them, just shut up.

And so I think that is so easy because my desire, when I sit down with

people, I want them to have clarity.

I want them to understand.

I want them to get fired up and get behind it and have that energy.

But man, there's nothing more exhausting than somebody who just won't

just be quiet and just let it sit.

So I think that letting it rest, it's almost like I'm grilling my steak.

You have

Letting it rest.

it sit for five minutes and let the, let it rest.

So I love that topic.

and then the body language too.

There's a lot of, there's so much here.

I think that's true.

That's that you're talking about that comes back to self awareness.

And it's so hard for an executive or anyone, whether you're leading a

team or leading a company to have the awareness piece, because if you don't

know, you overspeak, how will you know?

So do you have any advice for the listeners on how

to improve on those areas?

Oh, do I,

you know, and this is part of a lot of the training we do our mentoring,

my keynoting, it's seeing yourself through the eyes and ears of your

listeners, because I can tell you what I think that's just my opinion.

And we get so much feedback.

So there's always going to be the feedback you want to keep

and that you want to throw away.

It's recordings.

And I record myself on my phone a lot.

I obviously want to practice what I preach, but even if I'm on a

zoom call, I'll just put my phone down below and I'm only recording

myself inside of the conversation.

And then when I watch the playback, whether it's an audio or it's a video

playback, I'm really paying attention to how did I feel during that interaction

versus what reality States this podcast, when you send it to me, I'll watch it.

And I'll rip it apart.

I'll rip it apart.

And I'll create a list.

I have a bunch of post it notes hanging in front of me right now.

And it's tons of feedback that I'm receiving from my

coaches, my accountability

partners.

Once I accomplish it, I'll tear the post it off.

And then I'll just write another one, right?

Like it's seeing yourself through the eyes and ears of your

listeners, because without that, we don't know what we don't know.

And there is a huge disconnect of how we feel versus what reality States.

So many times my clients will say, if I know what I'm saying, I'm good when I

feel comfortable, I'm good when it's easy.

And the one thing I want your listeners to be really cautious of because you feel

good because it's easy does not guarantee.

You have, this level of influence that I'm referring to, it's

this, you've got

to be able to see yourself through the eyes and ears of your listeners

and how fortunate are we that you have a, I mean, everyone has a phone,

press record, take a look.

And then people say to me, well, it doesn't look like me.

That's a sign of how, when you, what you feel like.

Is so different sometimes from what someone is experiencing.

Well, it doesn't

sound like me.

I was working with a VP of marketing not too long ago and we were

doing some virtual mentoring and I was saying to her, well, record

yourself and we do a baseline.

Just get a very first recording on her phone.

She's watching her playback.

We're a couple of seconds into her playback and she says

to me, well, that's not me.

And I said to her, it looks like you.

I think it's you.

And we go to this place of denial and excuses.

Because it doesn't feel the same way.

So as a result, our body doesn't like to be uncomfortable.

Your subconscious will always go to a place of you're

talking, keep talking, right?

Just keep

rambling.

It

lies to us to some degree.

That's why this is so important because when you're in the middle of a high stakes

conversation and you're feeling like, wow, I'm really bad or wow, I'm really good.

You've watched yourself so many times on playback, but your level of

awareness, Dallas in the moment, where you are and how much influenced are you

really communicating in that moment?

I love that.

I think that you know, one, and I think that it's even harder because no one

likes to hear themselves on recording.

everybody's Ooh, and even if someone was recording a speech that you

made, or I've been on a podcast or anything like that, you just, you

hear it back and you're just like, Oh,

no.

But at the end of the day, that is what I think where you're talking

about not feeling comfortable, that is a space where feeling

uncomfortable is so helpful in growth.

Because I think if you expose yourself to that video and you're

like, that's not me, right.

But that's the you that everybody else is getting to experience, you know, and man,

it's wild Dallas, because sometimes we'll have

people fight the process.

Of watching themselves on playback and they're like, well, if I had, if

I knew what to say oh my goodness.

So get rid of the excuses because if you got rid of the excuses, you've

could have been practicing and elevating your influence all along.

Here's the deal.

What doesn't challenge you will never change you.

Mm.

of really get

comfortable with being uncomfortable.

I explained the work that my team and I do.

Initially you go to this place where it doesn't feel like yourself because you're

changing things about your communication.

You've never given thought to.

So you step in a pretty deep valley and while you're in that valley of

discomfort, it really does stink.

it's, it sucks.

It's not fun.

You

have To be in that valley.

To come out of it, to look back and say, I have no idea how I ever rambled.

Now that I know what I know, and I'm seeing the benefits of

people following my message,

me being able to dab my message on the fly, most important, I

consistently get people to be influenced by my recommendation,

but she had to go.

You had to step in that Valley.

To know what's on the side and Dallas, as much as we know this to be true, I

really, from the work I do, the multitude of people I interact with, I really

think this is the difference between someone who's consistently influential

and someone who's not this person.

They understand the power of practicing insanely in private,

Mm.

practice they do, there's deliberate, they're

deliberate behind what they do.

We think about any athlete.

Yes.

Athletes are

like that.

They just, we just finished the Olympics

Yes.

as I watch that, I think about the hours, the determination,

they're not willing to give up.

Now, I'm not saying you have to practice 24 7 around your communication skills.

I'm saying go off of the Nike brand.

Just do it.

Their brand simply means you don't have to win a marathon.

Just do it.

Just do it.

just start doing it and experimenting with

what's that 10 percent that I

haven't even realized was possible.

That's right.

I think that's such a great analogy.

I love the Olympics.

We, I stayed up way too.

I'm actually, I'm getting better sleep now because I was staying up too late watching

like ping pong and whatever other, crazy.

I love the track.

I'm a track

guy.

So seeing the track races is fantastic.

So I just,

I love experiencing that.

and.

To your point, the idea is that you don't necessarily have to train like

you're going to the Olympics, but what your point is solid in that is there's

intentionality behind the effort that they put in prior to the performance.

and I think that when you talk about influence, if you're leading people.

you have a responsibility as a leader to put an intentional effort to make

sure you're performing at the level that you need to perform that is something

that you're giving to your, the people that you're leading because your

performance is your gift to the people that you're leading in a lot of ways.

And if you're not putting in that effort, then you're not really leading

them well, as well as you could.

And you're not getting the most out of them because if you can't influence

them, like you're describing, then you can't get the alignment that you need to

have the performance and the excellence that everybody's trying to create.

So it really boils down to your intentionality that

you're willing to put in.

Your work and effort that you're willing to put in and being a great leader.

And I think that is, I think that's fantastic.

Now, when we talk about consistency and we talk about practicing this

delivery, I could see that some leaders might say, yes, but that's going to

come off as like salesy, or rehearsed.

it's not going to come off the way that people are going to really connect.

And I think there's a piece of that.

There's a piece of it.

The consistency is one.

I think authenticity in that consistency is real important.

And you talk about that.

So what, in, in terms of auth authenticity, how do you see

that as it relates to leaders and their communication?

You need to be.

This is what I mean by Monday to Monday, where it will not come off authentic.

If let's say brevity, we get on this recording together and suddenly

I'm going to think about brevity.

I'm going to use pauses, get rid of all the extra words that are out of context.

But five minutes before this call, I was, um, um, you know,

this was my, um, interaction with my, my, um, previous call.

So if you, this is what I mean by elevating your influence, you really

need to be doing it all the time.

Thinking

like the athlete, however, that athlete practice, like your

children, your girls soccer, however,

they practice is how you're going to perform now.

Unlike we're not athletes.

Most of us, I'm making the assumption here, but in the

corporate world or as an entrepreneur every day for you is game day.

I find that when I get coached and my coaches will just rip it

apart and there might be something there's always something new that

they're coaching on me to work on.

I will go into my personal conversations with friends, family, even with my team.

And I will put it on ultra speed because I'm thinking I just want to accomplish it.

It's just how I'm wired, but I'll accomplish that new skill.

And I'm doing it though in my personal life.

So it transfers over here, and that's where the authenticity comes into play.

That's where I tell every client when they'll call me and they'll ask, can

you teach my executives how to present?

I'm like, nope, you'll prepare them

for this big presentation.

I go, here's what I'll do.

I'm going to help them present in every conversation they're

in, even in their personal life.

And that way, when they've got their big stage moment three

months from now, they have been, this is them, this is what they've

developed.

And that to me is, where.

My work is so different around influence because I'm

not just saying, when do you need to be influential on social media?

When do you need,

I'm saying you've got to create some core skills that communicate

this trust, this connection when those core skills are built, that

is when you reach authenticity.

I've got a model that I used in my keynotes and it says consistency

plus authenticity equals trust.

Yes.

Yes.

so much, there's so much buzz right now about be authentic.

Well, what is that though?

People need to know how to do that.

And that's where my team and I come in Dallas and we'll literally sit

down with people and do recordings and video record them and show

them, okay, here's your strength.

Here's some distractions.

What do you want to change?

Because if

we don't get the commitment from them, I'm not going to,

spend time trying to do that.

enhance what you don't even want to enhance, but it

comes down to where I'll say, all right, when you go home tonight,

you're sitting around the dinner table with your family, practice brevity.

I want you to think about brevity

Right.

and if the changes happen, cause even you,

you said practices intentionality.

I think brevity is intentionality too.

So this really is about taking a look, just take a look at yourself, how you

interact with in your personal life, how you act in your professional life.

And it's about elevating everything.

So it's elevating your practice, elevating the feedback that you get.

Maybe this is also the feedback elevating the accountability of how are

you going to hold yourself accountable and what resources in your network are

you going to use to help you do that?

Because I do not think you can elevate your influence by yourself.

I agree with that.

Not only that.

it's too much work.

Don't do more work than you need to.

It's way too much.

Yeah.

And you can get there a whole lot faster if you work with others.

So I agree with that 100%.

that's why athletes have coaches and that's why business

professionals have coaches as well.

I think it's just very interesting and we've harped on the Olympics, but it's so

funny because we talk about how much those athletes practice and like 90 percent of

their time is spent practicing and only about 1 percent for 1 percent of that

performance and they get paid for that.

So they're getting paid for their performance.

But most of their time is spent practicing.

And I love what you said, because it's true.

90 percent of our time that we get paid for is having to perform.

If you're a leader, most of your time, you're having to perform this leadership.

But if you're not even, if you're not able to sharpen the sword, you've got to find.

Ways and time to be intentional about sharpen the sword, because if an athlete

who's wanting to perform for 1 percent is practicing 90 percent and you've

got to be performing 90%, we've got to find some ways and times where we can

start practicing and getting better.

Some of that may be overlapping, like you were saying, it's at the dinner table.

it's integrating it into all aspects of your life.

Cause we've got to find ways to get better everywhere, so that

we can have time to do that.

we had, this was, this was a couple of months ago, it

was a VP of sales and my team was working with him and his sales team.

We started talking about how do you take your delivery skills, your behaviors, and

you interact with slide decks because they are pitching, they're pitching all the

time.

And we get to this portion, we, one of the big takeaways is you're the message.

Your deck is your backup.

Hmm.

you.

We got, how do you balance that conversation?

Right?

And at he, the VP, he slams the boardroom table, the boardroom that we're singing,

he's like, why haven't we thought of this?

We spend hours putting together our decks hours.

And then when we get in front of this potential client to pitch

to them, they don't see the hours we put in the deck, they

see our delivery and we never practice our delivery.

Ah.

And that's just

one example of many clients that have said to me, I just, I don't practice

because I don't have the time.

And I go, that's why finding the moments in your day of these random conversations

that you're having, that's practice.

Those are those practice times that you have instead of, I've

got to carve this out.

Well, no one has time.

We, how many of us can say at the end of the day, I had so much extra time today.

I don't even know what to do with it.

that's, yeah,

Maybe when we retire.

I don't know.

I don't know if that's what it's like

Yeah, maybe,

but

I don't know, we'll keep each other posted on that one.

I think your point to that, especially, it's so funny.

You said about sales and I think people, sometimes they don't realize

that, that is huge truth that you just dropped there literally this week.

I had a presentation from an organization, a company that we're

trying to sell me their services.

And, Everything looks so be well done.

They're branding messaging on point, very relational.

I was like, wow, . These guys are great.

And then said, well, let's set up this onboarding call and the main person

that they were wanting to work with me.

Didn't turn on the camera.

I've never met the person before was very Standoffish very kind of

condescending in the conversation.

and it was the exact opposite of Everything I had seen all the bright

and shiny and it was literally the way that they communicated did the

opposite we ultimately decided it wasn't a good fit and the reason simply

was the communication that pitch that you said that pitch It was not authentic.

It wasn't consistent with everything else.

And so it just brought up all these red flags, Whoa, what are we doing here?

this is not a good idea.

And so it's true.

It's like exactly what you said.

It's the message is important, but everybody's looking at the messenger.

It doesn't matter.

You're standing up, making a sales pitch.

It's going, you have to be, you have to be next level on that in

terms of influence and credibility.

So yeah.

I think it's true that when you were talking about that, I was just

thinking about that call this week.

I was like, wow, that literally just happened to me this week.

Well, let's talk about this because we, I want to, before we, before we have to

go, I want to get into one last thing.

I think our listeners were really.

Really enjoy.

We have the one on one coaching system.

We have a lot of clients that are using that to drive coaching

further down in their organization.

And so we have coaches all through these organizations that are leading

these coaching sessions and they're asking questions that one of the

things that we train them on, the questions are given to them.

So this

this six questions, three are always the same.

Three are always different.

And one of the things that coaches do, we say is this, they practice the

80 20 rule in this coaching system.

So they want the person they're coaching to speak 80 percent of the time.

And as a coach, they're only giving about 20

percent of the time giving feedback.

And so I want to talk about that as it relates to accountability

and trust, because we've talked about building trust, but one of

your talks is on accountability.

And so I just wanted to take the last few minutes.

that we have and talk about how do we do that?

Well, because I think some organizations could be like heavy

handed on the accountability and it feel like big brother.

And I think that other side, you can have no accountability.

And it's just the wild west.

So I know that's a lot, and I've talked about one on ones and

accountability, but I'd love to

open that up to, to talk through.

Yeah.

You know, there's one step I take before the actual interaction occurs.

I'll give you an example.

When someone calls me, an executive calls me and wants me to mentor

them, I always say to them, the mentoring does not work for you.

You need to work for it.

I just want to make sure that you've answered the question of why, now?

Why mentoring?

And why with me?

And in so many times, there's this look of, huh, I've never given that thought.

And it gives me a real good sense of, is this person ready to walk

this journey to make sure they get the return on investment?

My commitment, I tell every client, I don't take mentoring lightly.

I am messing with your career, with your personal life.

You've got to be all in, or it won't work.

My teachings won't work.

Right.

I think the accountability falls on, if I want to hold myself

accountable, that's my responsibility.

So from there, it's reaching out to who in your network and you can have as many

accountability partners as you want, who in your network you feel like is

going to show up, meaning when they are scheduled to meet with you, they show

up, they're ready to get meant to you

Hmm.

Hmm.

willing to tell you the truth.

Hmm.

so much of accountability to me is on myself and I get

it as a leader of my company.

Of course, I've got action steps and having those folks

hold themselves accountable.

But I'll give you an example.

We've got this accountability program right now within my team

and everyone's partnered up and we're just trying it for 90 days

and you're just with the one person.

And I said to my accountability partner, I said to her, what do you want?

You tell me.

You tell me exactly what you want and how you want me to do it, and

then I'll figure out the rest.

So it's this two way street, and I think sometimes, I get it, leader

and then the teams that they lead.

But if we're talking about individual accountability, that to

me is really your responsibility.

Anytime I mentor someone, I say to them at the end of the mentoring session to

prepare for the next one, I'll say to them, here's my thought based on where

I see you are right now and what we'll cover next time, but it's up to you.

So when we meet, you're just going to come to the table to tell me what you've been

practicing and what do you want more of?

right,

and to me, that changes that it's not leader micromanaging.

there's a

difference.

The

accountability is now a partnership.

yes,

It's similar to if you ever had a personal trainer in your

life or a workout buddy, if they're waiting at your front doorstep at 5 AM

to go for the run, the walk, whatever you're putting your feet on the floor

out of your, you're going to be there.

yes,

But it's this

two way street, I think about, I have a personal trainer.

I go to him very early this morning.

I was there and we were joking.

I said to him, I go, I don't know.

I come here twice a week and I know the torture.

I know what's going to happen, but it's still on me.

Like he'll set the layout, the workout, but he'll always say to me, how

much are you going to go in today?

yeah,

He'll, he'll guide me.

and to me that's the part I think it also builds when you can create that

type of partnership leader to employee or

vice versa.

And that leader also is it appropriate relationship where you can say,

all right, so I'm going to be, I'll be your accountability partner.

I love for you to be mine as well.

um,

I know that's a big step for some people, but there's a difference

then between leader managing their people versus an accountability partner.

yes.

I think that's such good.

Advice.

And I think as it relates to our coaching system, that 20%, a lot of times is

the time the coach takes to lean in

to the conversation, it's to say, I'm here, I hear you made that

commitment for the next 30 days.

Is that what you really want?

Is that what you really want to do for the next 30 days?

Are you committed to doing that?

Are you really?

Cause last month we did this and now, you know, I kind of felt like you were Are you

committed to doing this the next 30 days?

That comes a lot easier when that person knows and hears that you're

doing that because you care about them because you're authentic, because you're

consistent and because you're leaning into what they want, how they want to.

To move towards that and you're being a resource for them.

So I think that's really great advice.

very great advice.

Well, listen, Stacey, we always ask our guests a couple of

questions at the end of every show.

And this has been fantastic, by the way.

the line, the one liner that stuck with me is what doesn't

challenge you won't change you.

Oh, that was good.

That was

I know that.

hurts, doesn't

So, oh yes, my, my man, that steps on my toes.

My toes are bleeding right now because of that.

Oh, so good.

And the best of ways.

So we always ask your guests a couple of questions.

Number one, if people want to book you for a speaking engagement or

check out your new book that's coming out in October, how do people find

out more information about you?

The website says a great place to start and it's my name on it.

So it's Stacy hunky inc.

com

and then on the site or just Google me and we are heavily into social media our

value system there is to share value.

We're constantly pumping out resources.

Obviously we're pumping out nuggets right now about the book.

That's a great place.

If you want to follow us from afar.

And, social media, the most active presence you're on.

Are you, is

it LinkedIn, Instagram, LinkedIn?

Okay,

great.

Those are the top two.

We'll put those links in the show notes, so you guys can have that.

And last question we always ask our guests is who would you like

to hear as a guest on the last 10%?

Yeah.

Can you get Simon Sinek?

That's a

that, that will be awesome.

Yeah.

we'll keep that on the list for sure.

yeah, we'll put a call in his, our people will call his people.

We'll see

if we can make that one.

No,

answer right

I love it.

Yes.

surely he will.

we have so much in common.

no, that's awesome.

I love Simon and read a lot of his books.

And yeah,

can I share one real quick final thought about that?

this kind of sums up everything that we've done.

I had heard him on a podcast, one of his many, and he shares

how he was at a conference.

Phil Knight was presenting at this conference from Nike

at some point during Phil Knight's presentation, he

asked the audience stand up.

If you work out, you run for a workout at least once a week and the majority of

the audience stands up, stay standing.

If you run at least twice a week for exercise, a lot of people sat down.

Finally, stay standing.

If rain or shine, light or dark, you run at least three times a week for exercise.

A lot of people sit down.

There's not many people left standing.

And he said to those that were left standing, he said, when it's dark, it's

cold and it's raining and you're out there by yourself for your run and you

happen to run past that street lamp.

Think of us standing underneath that lamp cheering you on.

Oh, that's

And Simon Sinek comes in and he said, you know what Phil

Knight was doing right then and there?

He was defining what their brand Nike's brand just do it is.

And I made that reference a little earlier in this podcast.

It's you don't need to be in the next Olympic track and field.

You just have to do it.

And that's a great way to just summarize everything that you and I covered.

love it.

Stacey, that is just fantastic and so motivating, inspiring.

I think so much of your conversation has been, I know our

listeners have really enjoyed it.

Congratulations on the new book as an author.

I know how brutal that process is.

We were talking about the show or the show.

And so anybody that comes out in the book, I'm like, I got.

I got props cause that's, that is so much work.

And so wish you the best of luck on the launch and happy to support you in that.

Thank you for sharing it.

Thank you for being on the last 10%.

So good.

So blessed to get a chance to meet you.

Thank you.