When I read this Instagram post on Lucy's grid, it reminded me so much of how I felt about my business last year, I knew I had to have her on the podcast. It said:

“I had a business that was making me good money but I was often working evenings and weekends and my 'created for flexibility' business was making me stressed and distracted when I was with my family and friends. Also I didn't love what I was doing and questioned it all the time.

It took me a while to realise that this isn't success and what I wanted was possible and something I was allowed to have (hands up if you're telling yourself stories about how you're lucky with what you've got and if you were different it would all be OK)”

Todays episode is for anyone who has wondered if running your only business was really this hard, if you really need to be available 24/7 or of you wonder if it's worth the impact on your mental health.

Lucy and Sophie chat about their own experiences and Lucy shares 3 strategies she uses with her clients to help them make positive changes to their lives and businesses.

INTRODUCING: LUCY HARVEY

Lucy is a business coach who helps women achieve their dream job by creating or adapting their business. Her coaching focuses on reconnecting with yourself, understand how you work and what you want, and then creating clear strategies to grow your aligned business.

KEY LINKS:

WEBSITE: www.lucyharveycoaching.com

INSTAGRAM: @lucyharveycoaching

Free Discovery Call: Click here to book

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Hello, and welcome to growing pains.

The marketing podcast for parent and baby brands who want to grow and get

more consistent sales, but without the overwhelm of feeling like you have

to be online 24 7, I'm Sophie, your host, and a Facebook and Instagram ad

strategist who specializes in parent and baby brands as well as a mom of two.

Join me each week as I alongside some wonderful guests, she had practical

tips and advice about how you can use and combine marketing strategies

to get more impact for your effort.

Hello today.

I am thrilled to be here with Lucy.

Lucy is a business coach who helps women achieve their dream job by

creating or adapting their business.

Her coaching focuses on reconnecting with yourself, understand how you work and

what you want, and then creating clear strategies to grow your aligned business.

So Lucy, welcome to the podcast.

Hello.

Thanks for having me.

No.

I'm very excited that you're here slightly different episode today.

Often we're talking about like really practical strategies.

But I'm going to explain in a minute after we've done the intro, why

I feel like this is so incredibly important for people to really start

thinking about how they want their lives to look and their work to look.

But before we do that, let's talk a little bit more about you.

What is your work family life kind of set up?

So I I'm a mother of two kids.

Who are seven and 11 as of yesterday?

Oh, my gosh.

Yes.

So changed a secondary school and all of that is looming.

Like that's quite a big shift.

Isn't it?

Are you're kind of in the tween years, are you getting into that?

oh Yeah.

Massively.

Yeah.

And it's just.

Full yourself as well.

Obviously for them, that's, it's a, it's a different, it feels

like a different phase of life.

And and you feel the passing of time, I

I can imagine that.

Yeah.

So Yeah.

and I'm married to Brendan.

We live in lovely Strout.

Oh, very nice.

Very nice hair, very lovely lifestyle.

So as you said, I'm a business coach and I can give you a bit

of a rundown of how I arrived

How did you get that?

Yeah.

So, so I used to work pre-children I worked in media, in marketing.

I've worked in marketing since my mid twenties and And always really enjoyed it

and very, been very lucky where I worked.

I worked in places like the discovery channel IPC media,

which is a big publishers.

So always have really exciting, interesting places to work.

Yeah.

And then I was made redundant for my role just before I fell pregnant

with my first child, with my daughter.

So., it was an interesting time.

I was going to interviews

Oh my gosh.

ballet, which obviously didn't make the number one candidates.

But felt had that driver to just still create something.

And then.

My daughter's idea.

Didn't so I didn't obviously got offered a job.

My daughter was born.

I stayed at home with her, or a fair, a fair while.

And then I started, I always, always wanted to work.

I was very happy to be able to be at home with my daughter.

But there was always something in the background, obviously

wanting to have money, but more of a fulfillment piece as well.

absolutely.

So I started freelancing doing some never really sought to the business.

It was very much just bits of work here and there.

Then I had my son and when he was about 18 months, I decided

to try and go back to work.

I soon realized this.

Probably going to happen because mainly because of childcare issues obviously

I worked in media that was in London.

So at the time we had moved out of London so the commute meant extended

childcare, which I didn't love the idea of my kids being in long, long, long

hours of childcare, but also the cost.

I such a familiar story.

Isn't it?

I don't feel like in however many years ago that was what five or six

years ago that's really changed at all.

Has

No, no, I don't think so.

So in a way, my business was born out of quite lots of frustration.

And I really didn't.

I don't think, which is interesting where I've ended up.

I, I started it because I felt like that's all I could do.

I felt like it was the only way.

And I came across digital mums and trained at the social media manager,

which honestly felt like one of the only options at the time to be truly flexible.

And.

Then I extended my skillset to do Facebook ads because I saw the

value that that offered people.

And I worked and I was doing other forms of marketing for people.

So I sort of essentially had a consultancy and marketing consultancy and it was doing

to be honest, it was doing really well.

I got myself up to a 5k months.

So on paper, it was a success.

But it never felt like a success.

If I'm honest with you.

It always felt like it should be bigger and better.

And I wasn't actually enjoying myself very much.

I was exhausted.

I was working all the hours and.

It just never felt like I was there.

It never good enough.

So after doing that for a few years, I been thinking about coaching

for awhile and I retrained as a coach and absolutely love it.

And now I try and help people get to the point where they absolutely love

their business and their life, because obviously it's one of the same thing.

Yeah, absolutely.

I'm so excited to delve into this today because I think so many people are

going to resonate what you just said there, and that's kind of what we're

going to be digging into all of those shifts that you have about your business

and like how it kind of, you might be presenting on social media or is it

all like shiny and gray and it might feel like you should be happy with what

you're doing, but you're not quite there.

So we're going to dig into all of that.

But before we do that, we need to do at the important, quick fire round.

So are you ready for this?

Okay.

Tea or coffee?

I have to say T I think

Oh, let me tell you I'm one about the T dogs or cats.

I used to think cats, but dogs, dogs now,

why the shift?

Since.

Going to say something very controversial.

oh, come on.

See the points in bypass.

I've been superseded.

I rarely have I still like to have a cuddle, but Yeah,

but the dog so much better.

we just both things in the house.

Yeah.

Bagels were crumpets

Oh, bagels.

at beach or pool

Ooh.

Ooh.

Each

beach and nice winter or summer

summer.

color or monitored.

Nice.

I haven't actually had anyone say motor crime.

Yeah.

Well maybe that's the kind of people I attract is a

little about the color I know.

Right.

And early morning or late night.

If I had the

Yeah.

Amazing.

Okay.

So I think.

Going back to just what you were saying.

I, when I was looking for people to come on the podcast and I came across one

of your lovely posts on Instagram and we know each other, cause obviously you

have done Facebook ads in the past and we've been in similar courses together.

And so I already newly seen, so I'm following her in Instagram.

And then I saw this Instagram posts and it really kind of hit home to me.

And it really reminded me of where.

Probably about a year ago and I've kind of felt it on and off

since I started my business.

This is what the pace I'm going to read the post out or an exit.

I said I had a business that was making me good money, but I was

often working evenings and weekends.

And my created for flexibility business was making me quite

stressed and distracted.

When I was with my family and friends.

I also didn't love what I was doing and questioned it all the time.

It took me a while to realize that this isn't success and

what I wanted was possible and something I was allowed to have.

Hands up.

If you're telling yourself stories about how lucky you are with what you've got and

if you were different, it would be all.

Okay.

And honestly, I think when I started my own business, like I was so excited,

like within that launch phase, you know, like it was like, okay, I put

this new thing, I'm going to like, you know, I'm going to put all into it.

And you know, it's sort of, it's okay to work evenings and it's okay to

work the weekends because I justified it as, you know, You've got to get

yourself out that you got to be visible.

You've got to be consistent.

You've got to let people know you're there.

And that I think is fine.

When it's the first six months, maybe the first.

I think after a while, especially if you've got young kids and you're

doing this around any kind of family life, or even any kind of like

caring role in anything that you're kind of, you want that like life

balance, you realize after a while, I think that that is not sustainable.

The career you sort of left in London because it was so inflexible,

suddenly you sort of found that you've recreated that for yourself.

And I found myself saying that like, oh, I can't go to the mother's day morning

at the nursery because I've got a call or because I have so much work to do.

Like I just gone take the time out.

And it sort of really, I don't know, I got to a point where I

was like, I can't sustain this.

I need to work in a different.

And I know that when I speak to lots of our, my customers and clients, that

they're sort of in this position as well.

And when they come to me, because they're looking for ads to grow their business

so they can get to a point where they don't have to be in it all the time.

I know that you also work with clients to kind of help them re

look at their business model and look at like really delve into this.

Right.

And look at kind of how they can.

Take stock really?

I'm thinking about how they want their life to look.

I kind of summed that up.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I think so.

I mean, I've had clients describe.

Use the word prison when they've talked about their business and very other,

you know, various other terms that are similar and really what it's, when you

have this dream of starting the business, it wasn't to be working all the hours.

And if you had a job that.

Well, you were doing all these hours and you would be talking about leaving

it and you would, people would be telling you to leave it probably,

and it wouldn't be sustainable.

And we create these workplaces that we would, would not stand for if

they were an office in, in town.

I once created a, a post and the headline was.

Do you want to know who my worst boss was like, it was talking

about this and like, it was me.

I am at my worst.

Like I was my worst boss for so many, like not giving myself time off and not

really like looking after myself, I mean, almost felt like it was a really

demanding toddler, my business, like the, just demanded my time and attention all

the time to the detriment of kind of life.

Yeah.

Well, we often, I mean, especially when we're looking at your clients

and my clients, they are parents and they have often got very small

children and, and it's almost like they're in that servitude mind.

And they're used to this sleep deprivation and they're sort of living life on a drug.

And So.

stepping into this and then creating that again with your

business, it feels it's almost like a comfort place in a strange way.

It's like, this is how it should be.

Yeah.

Yeah.

That it has to be like you say that living on adrenaline, the like it

has to be busy and, and now, and I have to be doing 10 things at once

because I never have enough time.

I know.

That's what I mean still sometimes if I get myself to that place, that feeling

like, I never have enough time, like I need to be doing a hundred things at once.

I can't just sit and watch the tele.

I need to be doing my social media at the same time.

Because I'm always need to be doing something.

Because I don't have enough time.

So if people are resonating with this and thinking, oh my goodness,

this really sounds like me.

And I really am thinking I need to do something about it.

Where would we start?

Okay.

So you start?

with you, you start right back to.

What I ask people to do and set up exercises and use coaching techniques

to reconnect with themselves with, with them, who are they?

What, what did they like?

What don't they like?

What, how do they want to spend their time?

What did they set this up for?

What's the big reconnect with the big vision.

Because there's a lot of, there's a lot of stories out there that

tell you that you, you have to work hard for it to be a success.

You shouldn't be.

Tired all the time and it's just the norm.

And there are, there are just lots of stories and I think it can just run

away with you or you forget about you.

So there's there's a big piece of work to be done around that.

Just going back to yourself and also giving yourself permission

to say, I don't like doing that, or I do like, do I love doing it?

Or I don't, I'm really tired.

I might not do anything stay that, you know, it's all it's really

sort of trying to retrain out of the adrenaline state said they.

And I think as well as parents, parents, especially parents of younger

children, often that, I mean, it's so much bigger often than just work.

Isn't it?

It's so much, like, it's not just a case of like, oh, I've been working too much.

I need to just go back to, I love it can often be a case of okay.

Without.

I feel like I'm just a mom of kids.

So what I actually enjoy doing, and that might be going back five

years to like a time before when you had time to do like, do I still

love doing that type of exercise?

Do I still love going to the cinema?

Do I still love going out dancing or actually, is it other things now?

Exactly.

I mean, you're, you're spot on, it's all about identity and, you know,

being something other than a parent.

And how do you identify yourself?

As far as work is really, I mean, often as a parent work can be your, your me-time.

Yeah, I think that is often, it isn't, it it's an escape.

It's I feel a bit in control.

I feel like I know I'm doing mostly.

But when you're sort of surrounded by the chaos often of young children, it

can feel quite calm and like structured of but, but it's kind of finding.

That space.

You also as well.

I don't know if other people resonate with this, but I find it's like, if I say to

my husband, if say at the weekends, and it's all getting a bit much, and I say to

my husband, do you know what I actually, I really need to get some work done.

You okay.

To have the girls for a bit.

It feels like that is more.

Valid than me saying do you know what I really want to go for a swim?

Could you have the girls for now?

Yeah.

Completely.

like it's like, oh, that's a good reason working.

Whereas swimming, I mean, that's really, do you need to, like, it's

a bit indulgent, a bit selfish, like all that sort of stuff comes up.

Doesn't it?

When I first started doing this kind of work about a year ago, I really struggled.

I really struggled to even get.

Every day for a walk saying to my husband, I'm just going to go for a 20 minute walk.

I've really struggled with it.

I felt guilty that I wasn't at home sharing the load.

Yeah.

most definitely.

And I mean that, that's a massive thing.

Our businesses carry a lot for us.

And it, as I said before, it can just be your whole identity

wrapped up in your business.

So, and your whole sense of who you are outside of being a parent.

So it's.

mean, which is why it's really important to get it right.

And for it to be an enjoyable place for you.

So yes, it is really important to look back at the stories you

tell yourself about who you are and are these, are these correct?

Are these rights, are they actually your story?

Yeah.

are they someone else's stories that you're taking on?

I mean, I just, I get very excited about it when people, because if, if

you've already that the type of person who's prepared to start a business,

then you're, you're most of the way there you've, you've made the big move.

You're you're brave enough to do that.

So why not?

Finish off the story and make it into something that is truly amazing.

Both in a money sense of course, but in a lifestyle sense as well.

Yeah, absolutely.

So in terms of actually getting started with this, cause it can feel

like a lot kind of, and obviously it would always recommend getting

support from a coach, but if someone is today thinking like, oh my God.

Yeah.

Okay.

I would also feel really guilty for going out for a 20 minute walk.

How would you sort of suggest they start?

Is it a case of identifying things and like little by

little or making big changes?

Like where would you say.

So the best place to start is, I mean, you've probably

seen stuff on Instagram and diastasis about daily routines.

But the best place to start is with a daily routine, but to

see it as your time and to work out how much time can you take?

It can be five minutes.

It can be 15 minutes.

It doesn't have to be getting up at five o'clock in the morning to do it.

It can be any time that works within your day.

And there should be three parts of this routine.

And.

One needs to be some sort of presence.

So, so whether that's meditation, a breathing exercise, which is

essentially meditation anyway just a presence exercise where you can

just really sit there and look at.

You know, acknowledge what's in the room, what you can smell, what you can hear,

et cetera, because that's just the time.

It might be a tiny piece of time, but if you can connect to yourself every single

day, you will reap the benefits from that.

And then after that, it's always good to have a think about.

What you're grateful for.

Again, there's a lot of talk about gratitude on certain social media

platforms, but it, it really, it really does set the tone for your day.

And it really is another way of checking in with yourself because you know,

what, what are you doing this for?

Why are you here?

What, what are you happy about?

What's right in your life.

Focus on that.

And then the third part of this is intention setting for your day.

So really taking a bit of time.

What's the, what's the one thing that you want to feel about your

day or within your day, and just intentionally setting intentions have.

Be a real game changer and they sound like tiny things or

things that don't really matter.

But so many myself I know you do.

things like this.

And so many of my clients have said it just changes everything for them.

And it's just a really good place to start because it's, it's yours, it's your thing.

And it's just a small amount of time.

And.

You can see the benefits of spending a bit of time on yourself.

Yeah, absolutely.

I mean, I don't know if this is interesting to people, but like,

yeah, a year ago I was literally in my business all the time.

I really, really struggled to take any time for myself.

And then I started the daily routine and for me, that looks like a daily walk.

And in my daily walk, I kind of do these things.

So I often the app calm.

I often listened to that and kind of listen to like, even just like five,

10 minutes of just like breathing and either listening to nothing or you're

listening to her like a meditation or a five minute, they do these wonderful, like

five minute things on that I listened to.

And then I do a bit of a gratitude dump.

So in my head I orange gratitude rampage.

Sometimes I cold where I literally go through.

And like in my head, I just think of.

I will just literally go through and be like, oh, I'm so grateful

that everyone is healthy today.

I'm so grateful that girls are in childcare.

And so grateful.

I've got time for my work.

I'm so grateful that Pete bought me a cup of tea in bed this morning.

I'm really grateful.

I'm seeing my friends this weekend.

And it was literally just like, literally like every single thing I can think of.

Like, I'm really grateful the sun is shining.

And then I still kind of try and set my intention of like, even if I don't go out

for the walk until he gets home from work.

And some days that is, that is the way it is.

I will try and set my attention either for the rest of the day or how I want

to, like when I get home, I really want to be really present with the girls.

I'm going to put my phone in the kitchen and have an hour where

I'm totally present with them.

But generally I try and actually take my walk out of my work day.

And that was quite a big shift for me too, because I shifted into.

Paying for childcare.

And I had this sort of feeling belief that I had that if I was paying

for childcare, then I needed to be working a hundred percent of the time.

It was like the time was so precious that I had to be working a hundred

percent of the time that I had childcare.

And it was a massive shift for me to be able to say that actually, no.

I need to take time for myself as well.

So like this morning I've been to the gym.

I dropped the girls off at that childcare and school at eight,

and I went to the gym for an hour.

I will meet people for coffee.

I did a coworking down Tuesday and we had like an hour long lunch break and a chat.

And I go for my walk and I.

Can't tell you the difference is made to the balance I have in my

life and, and really genuine how I show up and how I know I don't

get as much work done, probably.

But what I do get is much more like inspired and I'm much

more focused on why I'm doing.

So if anyone goes to, if anyone needs a bit of inspiration, It cam

I don't talk about this sort of stuff on my Instagram very much.

And often people message me and say, oh my God, I don't know how you do it.

Or you seem like you're doing everything all the time.

And it's like, it really is only because I'm looking after myself that I can do

all this stuff that I'm like this podcast.

Yeah.

I mean, well, you, you are your.

So your, your bet, you're the number one resource.

So, and also it's, it's your time.

It's how you spend your time.

So if you want to spend your time feeling unhappy and stressed all the

time, then that's available to you.

If you want to spend your time theater really enjoying your life and feeling.

You know, like you're really getting somewhere and you would in a holistic

way that that's available for you to it's very, I mean, it's, it's

really interesting because I think a few years ago, I now for example,

I don't work on Fridays at all.

Yeah.

And I think I would have said things like, oh,

well, I mean, it'd be great.

Wouldn't it.

If I didn't have to work Friday, I can't, I can,

Yeah.

really has changed.

It really hasn't.

It's just part of the fact I don't work on Fridays,

Yeah.

so it's, it's really important to spend some time looking into these

things and then, you know, how you want to work is sort of, you know, moving on to

Yes, the next kind of piece.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So it's really about.

You know, how do you want to spend your day?

What kind of work do you want to be doing?

Who do you want to work with?

It's, it's the best place to start really?

We, we often just, we talk about it, like I say, in a way that,

oh, well you lovely, wouldn't it?

What it's all right for so-and-so they do this or, you know, well, I wish I

could have off, but we are the ones that in those rules on ourselves.

So.

If you could just open your mind to how you would like to work and

actually start planning it out.

And then I work with people to help them make that happen.

And then all of these things come together and you are there.

Work, you can then start working on your strategy, your business

model, your marketing, and it's coming from a very different place.

The energy behind it is very different.

It's not coming from a place of resentment.

We're not really actually wanting will work because you're

so overwhelmed and so busy.

It's it's coming from a place of genuine enthusiasm, genuine

excitement, genuine more of a.

because it's genuine, it's authentic.

It's how you feel.

Yeah, absolutely.

I mean, I think as well, like as parents, I was talking a little bit about it

just now, but we often go and get huge amount of choice about when we work.

Do we?

So like often I'll read things and it'll be like, oh, well, you know, if you if

you weren't best in the morning, then get up at five and do all your being

a big piece of work by 10 o'clock.

It's like, oh, that's lovely, but I've got a two hour long.

Children morning routine that I've got to get done.

So I don't actually start work until like half nine, 10, because that's

when I get back from the school run.

But you can still sort of plan your day out can't you in terms and try

and take advantage of when you, when you do different tasks, I guess.

Yeah.

Completely.

And, and there are other elements as well.

I mean, there's, there's things like your, your hormonal cycle.

I mean, that's a whole different.

Yeah.

You know, that's a whole subject, but you know, again, this

whole sort of reconnection with you is about not trying to change necessarily

you or what your situation is.

It's about working with it in the best possible way and accepting

who you are and how you work best.

And then applying that really.

Yeah, absolutely.

I actually, I follow a few people who really kind of do that sort of cyclical

cycles and one of them structured her whole business as around her cycles.

So she'll do.

With a one-to-one clients, she has three weeks of calls and then they have a fourth

week, which is an implementation week.

And that's the week where she's in her sort of winter.

If you think of it like that, she wants to have more time to rest.

And she wants to be more kind of insular and not have to kind of show up on calls.

So she structures a whole business in that way.

Which I think is amazing.

I had a bit of an a bit of an epiphany if you like a Christmas sort of time.

And someone asked me the question.

If you could design your like ideal work week, like what would it look like?

And I realized that I was missing connection and actually it's really lovely

doing zoom calls and and it's great.

They didn't have to travel, but I really miss like in-person connection.

And so I started putting, blocking my diary out.

So I don't take calls don't book in calls on a Tuesday generally, so that

I can go out and co-work, and not have to worry about, you know, the

logistics of like taking a zoom Yeah.

So I've structured my whole week around that.

And I now don't have calls on a Tuesday so that I can co-work with

friends and we've just launched this new, like, in-person, it's good.

Women's work.

And it's all around, like where I live in Surrey and we're doing like in-person

evening events and then coworking as well.

And that has all staff.

From that kind of vision paste I did about how I wanted my work and life to look and

how we wanted more like local connection and local network and to meet other

women who were kind of in the same boat.

That's exactly.

That's such a good example of where, I mean, you're

obviously really good at this.

You're great at this, but you just sort of

I do have a coach though.

I do have a wonderful cause I'm not really transparent about that.

Like, I have invested a lot in working with a fantastic coach called Andrea

and I'm, I tack her sometimes in my pace and Lucy's worked with her as well.

And

Yeah.

she is incredible.

And she really challenges me to kind of, to, to make this stuff happen because

like it's so easy, isn't it to listen to this sort of stuff and go, oh yeah,

well, I'd like to do that all, but I can't on a Tuesday because you know,

what, if someone wanted a call with me and like, you know, I need to be available

in case I need to get new clients.

But actually like that shift in mindset of being like, I control my business.

My business is not control me.

Like I literally have on like post-it notes on my, like on my computer

that remind me of stuff like this.

This is not easy switches, but there are some like, like you

say, like not working Fridays.

And I mean, for a very long time, I didn't work Fridays.

Cause I had the baby at home and our.

But I would try and work around her and it would really stress me out because

I'd be halfway through an Instagram post.

I'd be like, right.

A cow trying to do some social media while she's playing on the mat.

And then halfway through she'd cry.

I need to feed her and then I'd hit button.

And like my Instagram posts would disappear and I'd get so frustrated

until she sort of said to me like, but you, you don't work Friday.

So why are you even doing that?

And I was like, well, yeah, and you're right.

And like now I don't work Fridays at all.

And also in the evenings, my, because she li I mean, I feel like I need to mark.

This may have been, actually is the 28th of April when we're recording this.

And last night she slept through at 20 and a half months for the first time.

So.

that that definitely needs marking.

Oh

I know what I'm going to do, but it's a bit, I mean, I feel, I

mean, I'd love to say I feel like a new woman, but I think I'm so sleep

deprived, chronically sleep deprived.

It's going to take a while.

Exactly.

But I think I needed to, you know, clients would want to talk to me in

the evening or, you know, there'd be calls in the evening and I was so tired.

I have been so tired for like two years that I've actually

drawn a line in the sand now.

And it's very rare.

I do a call in the evening because I need to be able to rest and, you

know, to be my best self for my kids.

Like, and even to be honest, overnight, like taken her a long

time to sleep through and I needed to kind of be able to manage that.

So yeah, there's lots of different, some relatively small things I've put in place.

I've made a huge difference.

And I think really like having that vision, isn't it, of what that could

look like for you and then taking those little steps towards it really.

Exactly.

And then, you know, where the coaching really comes in is like you say,

where challenging your perspective.

It's almost.

Putting on a different pair of glasses because we believe what we believe and

there, you know, we've got evidence.

What we feel is what we believe is evidence for it.

And you know, certainly I've had some perceptions challenged that I, you

know, I w I was sure I was right.

I was very sure I was right.

And it takes a lot of work to dismantle it, but.

Yeah.

And lots of those beliefs were holding me back a lot

Yeah.

and lots of stories that I was telling myself.

So, and this is a read lots of things, you know, money, everything.

Yeah.

And that's the third thing really?

Isn't it it's

Yeah.

really digging into those what those beliefs are.

And especially like you say, money, mental blocks, like the sherds, the kind

of all that conditioning that we've had, like since probably we were quite young.

And so how do you kind of, how would you get started with that?

If you're kind of thinking like, because often you don't really know

what your limiting beliefs are, do you.

They just ingrained in you, like you think they're the truth, right?

Yeah.

When things trigger, you take notes about.

For thoughts, don't try and suppress it.

You know, there's, there's something being said to you here.

Yeah.

So that's often like being triggered.

What would that look like for someone.

so if someone.

says to you oh, how about you?

You come on my podcast.

I'd love you to come on my podcast and someone could, you

could just have this feeling of.

I couldn't do

No, I couldn't do that.

There's no way why would you, and that would be that needs looking at,

Yeah.

Yeah.

you know, or I'm, I'm not someone who does that, you know,

Yeah.

It's almost like a physic I find when I'm feeling triggered or activated, it's

often a really physical feeling like that.

That's kind of how I've really learned to recognize it.

Like, if you're thinking through, like, what does my, what

would my ideal week look like?

And then you say like, well, lot I say something like, well, I

don't take calls on a Tuesday.

Cause I co-work.

And that feels like., I couldn't do that or I feel jealous or I feel like you

might feel like it's all right for her.

She's got childcare four days a week or like wherever it is,

that's those things, isn't it.

Those challenges you might be comparison.

Yes.

Massive isn't them.

It's massive.

Yeah.

And that's, and that is also, there's a lot of assumptions that

you make based around comparison.

But Yeah.

if something's, like you say, it's often a physical feeling always an

emotional feeling and those things are worth looking at and the kind of thing.

That we would explore, but really the question, I mean, a very basic question

you can ask yourself is how is this?

Is it serving me to do this thing that I'm feeling triggered about or, or not?

So is it, is there a fear that's holding me back or, or

is it actually not good for me?

This is not right for me.

So really trying to differentiate between your guts and your.

Your gut instinct and fear, which, which takes it, you know, it takes a

lot of self-awareness and you know, it can take a lot of time and a lot of

support sometimes to get to that place.

But just asking, being curious about your reactions is probably

the best starting points.

I think.

Yeah.

Brilliant.

No, I totally, totally agree.

And it's quite amazing.

Once you start being.

Curious and kind of conscious of it, how much you sort of like, and

let the little stories in your head.

Like, for example, me saying, like, I couldn't go swimming.

But I, but actually like on having a conversation with my husband about it,

like I would now, like, he wouldn't mind me going swimming for an hour and

actually he'd quite like to go out for an hour, you know, for a walk as well.

And I'd be more than happy to facilitate that for him as well.

And it's almost like we have these stories and assumptions in our head

that like, oh, Leave, or I don't want to kind of dump him with the kids.

And actually he's not thinking that until he's like, oh no, that's, you

know, we'll do some, I'll do something with the girls and, and then we'll swap.

So I think, yeah, it's just really kind of acknowledging it as well.

Isn't it

it's acknowledging it.

And it's, and these are the easy places to start.

So, you know, we're talking about a lots of sorts of what may not feel like

business areas, but it's easier to start in your life or those, those areas.

And then you move it into your business and move it into your marketing.

So.

You know, there's a lot of fear around visibility and, and things like that.

And social media and imposter syndrome and, you know, all

of those sorts of things.

So yes, it, when you do this, this work in small ways, you can

then apply it to bigger things.

And that's when it really starts having effect.

And you really see the benefits in your.

Yeah, absolutely.

And I'm, I mean, I'm about to launch a group program and that's one of

the reasons why I'm doing it is because having lots of management

clients and lots of one-to-one training is lots of our contact hours.

And actually for me, I would rather kind of set up a program

where I can give people the same information and then spend all my

energy, supporting them to implement it and answering their questions.

And I'm blocking.

Rather than repeating myself five times to five different people

individually, because actually that's not them getting the best of me either.

And so that's kind of like a structural change I'm making to

my business because of all this.

I've kind of done in the background.

And there's lots of different ways that that can manifest.

And to be honest, like normally the end of an episode, I sort of link back

whatever strategy we're talking about, how it can kind of intertwine with ads.

So, you know, whether it's PR or email, I normally talk about like, okay, and,

you know, PR can work with your ads.

I think really today.

Ads are really good.

Once you get to a point where you're growing and your systemizing, and

you want to be able to go to your exercise class or take a, you

know, day co-working, you know, ads will still work in the background.

So you have to be less tied to social media.

There's less there's less need for you to be on demand in

your business all the time.

Like someone said to me that.

I only get sales when I post on Instagram.

So I have to post every single day and that feeling of being

tied to your business in that way.

So you have to send a post on a Saturday and Sunday is that's what is going

to hold you back eventually, because that's just not sustainable really?

And that's

the light that's where ads would very much support.

that person because they will be on social media in front of

the right people at All times.

when then they, and they can have a weekend off the ads

will still be there taking away.

So that's really where ads kind of link back to this sort of stuff.

That has been so helpful at Lucy.

I really hate people found this like an interesting insight and I'd like

a slightly different perspective on a business strategy because I think.

There's all the practical stuff isn't there, which I know that you do work with

people on with all of your like years of experience, but getting this bit right.

I think actually makes a difference between like the business you love

versus just the business that is there to kind of bring you in money.

Completely yes.

I keep absolutely.

And I keep seeing at the moment I'm on Instagram, I've seen probably four or

five businesses in the last few months and close because they've an, all of

them have referenced like their mental health and the fact that they kept

never had, they never have a day off and it's like taking over their life.

And, and I really, it makes me feel so sad that, you know, that's what, how

it's kind of ended because they kind of can't get it to a place where it runs.

Without them needing to be there 24 7.

So,

Lately,

And at the end of every episode, we always ask the guests.

What's one thing you'd recommend doing today just to get started.

It would be the daily routine.

Yeah.

It's just, that's concentrate on that.

There's plenty of information, how to set it up, but do your

own version that works for you

absolutely.

Is it about 30 days?

Isn't it?

If you do it once every like challenge yourself.

I know someone told me once, if you do it for 30 days, becomes like a habit.

that's That's what they say,

they say, isn't it?

Yeah.

I mean, maybe start with them.

Fantastic.

Well, thank you so much.

So if you want to keep in touch or find out more about Lucy, then you

can go onto our website, which is Lucy Harvey, coaching.com or on to Instagram,

which is at Lucy Harvey coaching.

I will put both of those links in the show notes.

Of course.

Also.

Free discovery calls.

If there's something that you really is really resonated and he feel like

he wants to talk to Lucy more about it, then I've got Calendly link for you to

be able to book a call with her, which again, I will put in the show notes.

Thank you so much, Lucy.

I really appreciate it.

No.

Thank you.

That's fantastic.

Thank you so much for joining me this week before you go, make sure you subscribe

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Thank you again for joining me, Sophie, in this episode of