S2 E5 Walker: Little Chorus of Chuck Norris

elaines money: 00:00:00

Also like, I know the show is called Walker, Texas

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Ranger, but I'm just gonna say it.

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: 00:00:06

I feel like this show is, would be

better without Walker, Texas Ranger.

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mabel: Oh good.

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: 00:00:14

We are recording.

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: 00:00:15

I was like, we needed

to catch that on pod.

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: 00:00:17

So good, good, good.

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: 00:00:19

elaines money: Welcome to Cool Girls.

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: 00:00:21

You don't.

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: 00:00:23

Welcome to Cool Girls.

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Shit.

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glo: blah, blah, blah.

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: 00:00:27

elaines money: more time.

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: 00:00:29

glo: Bloopers.

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: 00:00:30

elaines money: to Cool.

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: 00:00:31

glo: Sorry.

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elaines money: It's okay.

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You'd think by the second

season I'd have this down.

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: 00:00:40

Welcome to Cool Girls.

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Don't look at Explosions where we watch

dude tv, but quickly, because we blacked

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out at a, Barnes and Noble bought a

ton of books and now have to read them.

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glo: Hmm.

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I,

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mabel: like a great day though.

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elaines money: It was a great day.

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There was this guy, the manager

at the Barnes and Noble was just

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like, 'cause like my rule at the

time was like, okay, I can only

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have as many books as I can carry.

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then the Barnes Noble guy is of

course, like, here, have a basket.

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Don't you want a basket

for all those books?

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I was like, oh no, it's okay.

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I could carry it.

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And he's like, there's a

holiday weekend coming up.

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I'm just saying, and

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glo: Oh.

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elaines money: this man.

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mabel: Hi, this is Laura.

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My Barnes and Noble doesn't have baskets.

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glo: Whoa.

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elaines money: Oh,

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glo: What are they?

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elaines money: is

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mabel: don't think I've ever seen that.

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Yeah.

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glo: What the

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elaines money: it 'cause the literacy rate

of children has gone down significantly

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according to all of my classes.

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glo: They, they don't, they

don't need more than a handful

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of books here in Oklahoma.

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mabel: Yeah.

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We, we only need the Bible.

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That's the important one.

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Right?

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glo: mm-hmm.

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elaines money: You don't

need a basket for the Bible.

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Jesus helps you carry your load.

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glo: No, man, they got,

they got them pocket Bibles.

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elaines money: Shit.

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Really?

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Oh yeah, that would make

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mabel: Those are only the New

Testament, though usually.

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glo: you, you'd be surprised guys.

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I had a Bible that was about, no,

I had a bible about this big guys.

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Remember I was a camp counselor,

Christian camp counselor.

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I had a very small bib.

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elaines money: Is that how, how thick it

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glo: No, like it was about this,

this thick I'm showing about, I

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don't know, a thumb and then, I

don't know, like two packs of cards.

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elaines money: Okay,

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glo: It was real small.

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elaines money: fit that in your pocket.

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Yeah, yeah.

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Yeah.

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I just feel like

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the religious people should be on the side

of women having pockets because then women

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can carry their pocket bibles, their,

their pockets, you know what I mean?

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Yeah.

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Unless women aren't allowed to

read, unless this is like full

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Handmaid's Tale, I don't know.

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glo: This is cool.

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Girls carry Bibles in their pockets.

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This is, no, no, I don't think it is.

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elaines money: Ooh.

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No,

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mabel: Probably the opposite of that,

but we should still introduce ourselves.

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glo: I'm Glo.

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elaines money: Oh shit.

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I'm Beth

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mabel: And I'm Laura.

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glo: I'm Glo, I'm, oh shit.

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And I'm Laura.

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elaines money: and I'm Cramp

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Tramp.

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Cramp.

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Cramp,

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mabel: Hit me.

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Look, this is snacky cast because

Beth has her cup of tea that

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was just delivered hot off the

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elaines money: and a booby mug.

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glo: Aw,

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mabel: in the booby mug

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glo: titty.

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mabel: Just had a Popsicle, and I have

ice cream and a very tiny glass of wine.

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elaines money: I do believe he

slips some whiskey into this

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glo: Hey.

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All right.

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mabel: Okay,

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elaines money: time for Beth CBD.

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Hot Toddie.

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mabel: I would've never thought of that.

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On my own ever in the universe.

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I mean, I'm just so like

segmented about some things.

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Like this thing is only

this thing, you know?

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And then when somebody shows

me, you can put two things

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together, my mind is just blown.

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elaines money: Same.

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Same, same.

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glo: don't tell her about

ice cream sandwiches.

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elaines money: Oh shit.

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glo: I think we've had a

double dose of Walker this

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week and I'm not better for it.

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elaines money: dude.

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mabel: Yeah.

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Yeah.

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This one was at least, I don't know.

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It was, it was funnier in some ways.

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glo: It was very fun because we had

a leading woman that really like

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made it a cute episode, I think.

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mabel: can chew it up.

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Yes, yes, yes.

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Um.

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elaines money: Yeah.

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She is like charming.

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mabel: But before we get into that,

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elaines money: Yes.

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mabel: we have to talk about

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glo: I.

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mabel: monstrosity.

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That is the new Walker

Texas Ranger theme song.

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elaines money: Okay.

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I don't know if either of you have

experienced the Macho Man, Randy Savage.

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Whoa, shit.

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Oh fuck.

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Uh, for everybody at Home Glow,

just hell up her notes and it just

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says, oh fuck in big block letters.

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Um, so definitely go to

YouTube and look this up.

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We'll post it in the Discord.

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Laura's notes also say, oh fuck.

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Nope.

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They say OMG.

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This is this.

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Worse

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glo: This worse.

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elaines money: in big block

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glo: Your notes are so nice, Laura

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elaines money: I know.

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Today we learned that Laura

has stunning handwriting.

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mabel: no.

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glo: Pro

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mabel: It's the colors.

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The colors, fool.

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You.

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elaines money: Yeah, it's very pretty.

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But yeah, we'll drop it in the discord.

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If you hear rattling in the background,

that's just me refilling my pill case.

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Uh, 'cause I'm elderly and mentally ill.

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mabel: Yeah.

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No, I have to, I have to have it.

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Tell me which ones I take in the

morning and which ones I take at night.

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I, I broke my, well, oh, and broke

my old pill case and I got a new

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one instead of being blue for the

evening and yellow for the daytime.

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It's blue for the morning

and purple for the nighttime.

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And guys, I have mixed

myself up so many times.

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elaines money: uh, yes.

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Mine is just light blue in the

morning and then dark blue in the

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mabel: Oh, that is very nice.

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elaines money: yeah.

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Target.

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This, this episode is brought

to you by SSRIs and Target.

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Um,

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glo: I too have a pill, uh,

container that I do, I do it.

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And I got one of those really big

ones that do a whole month at a

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time, so I only have to sit down.

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But I only have to do all my pills

once a month and it's perfect.

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elaines money: That is perfect.

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I kinda love that.

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But you know what's not perfect?

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Uh, this theme song?

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mabel: This theme song

is so far from perfect.

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It might be on the other

end of whatever that is.

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Yeah,

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elaines money: I could be wrong,

but I am almost positive that

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it is in fact, Chuck Norris.

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Singing.

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Singing.

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Are we calling that

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glo: talk, singing, and

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mabel: there's a, there's

a name for that, guys.

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This is where my music degree is

gonna come in handy for just a second.

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Every, every now and

again, it gets to shine.

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So this style of singing when

you're like half talking, half

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singing, it was like made popular

by Lana, who was a German singer

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glo: Hmm.

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elaines money: Okay.

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Word.

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mabel: and not like super great,

but, um, it's called Rema.

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So

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glo: so

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elaines money: The German language is

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glo: Shrek means talk, right?

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mabel: Yeah.

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Shrek.

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Mm-hmm.

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And I'm, I'm not sure what

Jimma means exactly, but yeah,

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it's basically talk toxing.

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glo: sure.

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Sounds like he's stemming

while he is doing it, so

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elaines money: Yeah, he might be.

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mabel: I mean, I was just so

baffled by this, like why did

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we give this man the microphone?

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Like.

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I get, I, I'm sure it's because

he wanted this, you know?

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Right.

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Um,

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elaines money: No, I think he,

he was like, look, I need to

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win everything including pool

as we'll see in this episode.

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Um, and also I need to have at least.

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10 to 20 roundhouse kicks

to the face per episode.

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And I also, if you want me to

keep doing this, have to sing

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the theme song for the show.

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Also write it because I'm

sure he wrote it because Yeah,

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glo: pretty sure he was just

trying to go for that ego guys.

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mabel: Right.

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The, as I'm listening to this as

it's assaulting my being, uh, I

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turned to Aaron and I'm like, I don't

think that's a choir behind him.

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I think that they took his voice

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glo: No, God no.

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mabel: Lou like many times.

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Yeah.

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So it's a little choir of Chuck Norris's

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elaines money: Because of course, because

if you're, if you've got that, your head

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that far up your own ass, come on, you're

only gonna want a course of yourself.

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glo: That, that is a working

title for this episode.

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Little Course of Chuck Norris.

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elaines money: Oh,

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mabel: I was just, I,

and I think this is it.

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Like this is the theme song

for the rest of the time.

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Right.

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elaines money: yep.

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mabel: great.

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glo: thank god for Skip intro.

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elaines money: So when do you

guys think we're gonna go to Cease

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and Desist from Chuck Norris?

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Do you think it's gonna be like

the second episode of this podcast,

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glo: be, it'll be after Dave Matthews

apologizes to Telequah, Oklahoma.

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mabel: I think Chuck Norris should

have to apologize to Quah too.

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I don't know why.

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He just

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elaines money: I think Chuck

Norris needs to apologize to

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the entire United States of

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glo: are there gay people in Qua?

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mabel: Uh, yeah.

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glo: sure there are.

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mabel: Actually it's uh, they have

an organization called Equality.

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glo: Aw,

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mabel: Like, equality and Taliqua.

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elaines money: super cute.

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mabel: That is the best fucking name.

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I love it so much.

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Good job, guys.

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glo: good.

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elaines money: Okay, well now that

we've talked about that horrific, uh,

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theme song, here we are back in hell

for another episode of Absolute Trash.

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Okay.

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We're starting in a bingo hall and

a shot of a lady with the coolest

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fucking spectaculars I ever did see.

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glo: This entire hall, guys, I

put down what a fashion vibe, like

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mabel: Hey.

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This place is great.

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I'm watching this and I'm like, oh my God.

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So, uh, did I ever tell you I, I did

the tribal audit for one of the Indian

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nations here in the Oklahoma City

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glo: no.

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elaines money: no.

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mabel: Yeah.

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So tribal governments, a lot of 'em

get an audit from an audit firm, like,

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you know, to show their citizens,

like we're upfront with how we spend

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our money and blah, blah, blah.

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And a lot of them have casinos here now.

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But they started with bingo halls, right?

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'cause we didn't have legal casino

gambling for a long time in the state,

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but they were allowed to have bingo halls.

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So the tribal nation that I audited,

they had, they had a really big casino

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that's closer to like the interstate,

like a really nice one actually.

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They, they put me up there while I

was pregnant and doing their audit.

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And it was just real nice hotel.

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No breakfast, like anywhere.

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So I got to order room

service for breakfast.

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It was

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elaines money: Oh hell yeah.

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mabel: But anyway, their tribal government

was near the, like the first bingo hall

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and the bingo hall was still operating

and it had a really kick-ass lunch.

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So every day we'd go over and have

kick-ass lunch at the bingo hall

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and it looked exactly like this.

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Like still like this.

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Same chairs, same tables, same like vibes

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glo: I love it.

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elaines money: yeah.

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mabel: every day at lunchtime there

would be like the ladies who were

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staking out their place for when

bingo started later in the afternoon.

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Like

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elaines money: my God.

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: 00:12:34

mabel: yeah, I had some

like real nostalgia as we're

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starting in the bingo hall.

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glo: guys.

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I feel like if I really let

myself, I would be one of those

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ladies because this kind of thing

gives me such a dopamine hit.

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: 00:12:49

Like when we were at S-T-L-V-I, I did

not let myself sit down and boop, the

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: 00:12:55

shiny boops, because once I boop, the

shiny boops, it's too much of a payoff.

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: 00:13:02

elaines money: I get you.

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: 00:13:03

Uh, it really sucks that you were

not there though, the year that it

322

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was, it was the year I went with my

dad and my sister, so I didn't know

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you guys yet, which is so wild to me.

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So that would've

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mabel: time before us

326

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elaines money: there's

a time before y'all.

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: 00:13:20

Yeah.

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: 00:13:21

Ah,

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: 00:13:21

mabel: I know.

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elaines money: We went and it was 2021.

331

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So it was like the first, um, it

was the first convention after

332

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COVID, so like, it was kind of

empty and wasn't like super big yet.

333

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And strange New worlds wasn't out yet.

334

: 00:13:40

So like, it was still pretty chill,

but because COVID was still a fear,

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they couldn't do unhinged karaoke

with Dominic Keating and Connor

336

: 00:13:49

glo: Oh man.

337

: 00:13:50

mabel: no.

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: 00:13:51

That's the best though.

339

: 00:13:53

elaines money: Oh, you guys, but

you know what they did instead.

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Fucking bingo.

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It's all coming around.

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: 00:13:59

Yeah.

343

: 00:14:00

See there was a point to

the story the whole time.

344

: 00:14:03

Um, but yeah, so like they

did unhinged bingo and

345

: 00:14:07

it was hilarious.

346

: 00:14:10

glo: That sounds like so much fun.

347

: 00:14:12

elaines money: It was, it was very fun.

348

: 00:14:14

okay Laura?

349

: 00:14:14

mabel: I was trying to, I was trying to

like segue us, but then my brain stalled.

350

: 00:14:19

glo: You know?

351

: 00:14:19

You know what's not fun?

352

: 00:14:21

Talking about this episode and

not about Star Trek Las Vegas.

353

: 00:14:26

There we

354

: 00:14:26

elaines money: Yeah.

355

: 00:14:26

That's why we're really stalling over

356

: 00:14:29

mabel: Yeah.

357

: 00:14:29

Yeah.

358

: 00:14:31

Uh, I do love that.

359

: 00:14:32

As we are living in this nineties

nostalgia, bingo, hall Walker, Texas

360

: 00:14:38

Ranger just busts into to ruin our

good time because this is a bust.

361

: 00:14:45

glo: Yep.

362

: 00:14:47

elaines money: uh, so my notes

say people of all ages are playing

363

: 00:14:51

the bingo, and why wouldn't they?

364

: 00:14:53

It's hella fun.

365

: 00:14:54

And who shows up to suck the fun?

366

: 00:14:57

None.

367

: 00:14:57

The, none other than Texas

Rangers led by Walker's.

368

: 00:15:02

Boomer ass.

369

: 00:15:09

glo: Yeah, at least t's there.

370

: 00:15:12

mabel: Yeah, T's there.

371

: 00:15:13

T's cool.

372

: 00:15:14

Like he goes to bust the back room,

which is the real issue, right?

373

: 00:15:17

Because we have a money

laundering problem here.

374

: 00:15:19

Like that's the real reason.

375

: 00:15:21

Everything is, is an issue.

376

: 00:15:23

It's not the bingo itself.

377

: 00:15:24

It's like the money laundering

378

: 00:15:26

glo: There's just a lady vibing

on her Walkman with piles of cash.

379

: 00:15:32

mabel: vibing so hard.

380

: 00:15:34

She's just like bopping and

doesn't notice trivette at all.

381

: 00:15:37

And I was like, yeah, this is me all the

time with my noise canceling AirPods now.

382

: 00:15:43

elaines money: Oh yeah, same.

383

: 00:15:44

Same.

384

: 00:15:45

Yeah.

385

: 00:15:46

Played by none other than Raymond's

mom from everybody loved Raymond.

386

: 00:15:51

glo: Do we know her real name?

387

: 00:15:52

I feel bad.

388

: 00:15:54

mabel: Oh my God.

389

: 00:15:55

I don't,

390

: 00:15:56

glo: The name of the

character is Elaine Portugal.

391

: 00:15:59

mabel: yeah,

392

: 00:16:00

elaines money: Which,

393

: 00:16:01

mabel: I didn't know Portugal

could be a last name.

394

: 00:16:03

I thought it was only a country.

395

: 00:16:07

Hmm.

396

: 00:16:07

elaines money: anything can be a last name

397

: 00:16:08

mabel: Yeah.

398

: 00:16:09

If you try hard enough, right?

399

: 00:16:10

Yeah.

400

: 00:16:11

elaines money: hard enough, I guess.

401

: 00:16:12

Yeah.

402

: 00:16:19

mabel: Yeah.

403

: 00:16:19

Walker has to chase some employees

onto the roof though, and like

404

: 00:16:23

kicks them into submission.

405

: 00:16:25

Of course.

406

: 00:16:26

elaines money: Yes.

407

: 00:16:27

Yes.

408

: 00:16:28

Uh, he kicks them into submission

and takes down the probably

409

: 00:16:32

super expensive neon bingo sign,

410

: 00:16:35

glo: just explodes into fireworks.

411

: 00:16:38

Yep.

412

: 00:16:38

mabel: Mm.

413

: 00:16:39

elaines money: of course it does.

414

: 00:16:40

mabel: Yeah.

415

: 00:16:41

elaines money: Uh,

416

: 00:16:42

mabel: He's, after we come back from

theme Walker is such an asshole he's like

417

: 00:16:47

bitching to Alex that I can't believe you

got me doing these stupid bingo busts.

418

: 00:16:51

And it's like guy money laundering

is how you get most of these guys,

419

: 00:16:57

like the baddest of guys like.

420

: 00:17:00

You've either done a money launder

or you've done a wire fraud.

421

: 00:17:04

Or a tax fraud,

422

: 00:17:05

glo: Yep.

423

: 00:17:06

mabel: and that's how we can

get you, like, we can't always

424

: 00:17:09

prove you killed somebody.

425

: 00:17:11

We can't always prove you ordered a

hit, but we can prove you did bad money.

426

: 00:17:16

elaines money: Yeah.

427

: 00:17:16

mabel: So like stop being

an idiot about that.

428

: 00:17:19

Sorry.

429

: 00:17:19

You don't get to do as many kicks.

430

: 00:17:21

I don't

431

: 00:17:22

glo: Yep.

432

: 00:17:22

elaines money: Yeah.

433

: 00:17:27

And speaking of how you get the bads, our

old friend and Chucky's, uh, arch nemesis,

434

: 00:17:35

Ricky Ricken, uh, is behind this bingo

435

: 00:17:38

mabel: Wait.

436

: 00:17:38

He's our old friend.

437

: 00:17:39

elaines money: We've seen him before.

438

: 00:17:40

mabel: have.

439

: 00:17:41

elaines money: Yeah.

440

: 00:17:41

glo: when?

441

: 00:17:41

elaines money: Uh, you know,

that episode where everybody got

442

: 00:17:44

blown up real good, like the car

got blow up and, and, um, drugs?

443

: 00:17:49

Yeah.

444

: 00:17:50

I believe Ricky Ricken was

behind that and got off for it,

445

: 00:17:55

mabel: Ah,

446

: 00:17:56

elaines money: n him or something.

447

: 00:17:57

But we've definitely

seen Ricky Wicks before.

448

: 00:17:59

glo: okay.

449

: 00:18:00

I trust

450

: 00:18:01

mabel: I mean, I believe you.

451

: 00:18:02

I just was like, I clearly, like

when I'm taking notes for the show,

452

: 00:18:05

I'm like trying to take as little

time as possible 'cause like Yeah.

453

: 00:18:10

elaines money: Same.

454

: 00:18:11

Same.

455

: 00:18:12

I went right back to my true

blood marathon after this.

456

: 00:18:14

Not gonna lie.

457

: 00:18:16

glo: And guys,

458

: 00:18:16

elaines money: I will.

459

: 00:18:17

glo: is not, this is not an essay.

460

: 00:18:19

This is yuck.

461

: 00:18:20

Yuck jokes.

462

: 00:18:21

Like no one is using this for their

dissertation on Walker, Texas Ranger.

463

: 00:18:26

mabel: I mean, if I figure

out how, I'll let you know.

464

: 00:18:29

glo: Hmm.

465

: 00:18:30

mabel: Yeah, yeah.

466

: 00:18:31

Yeah.

467

: 00:18:32

elaines money: yeah.

468

: 00:18:32

He's losing his shit and they're

talking and she's like, listen,

469

: 00:18:36

this is how we're gonna NAB

Ricky Ricken, chill the fuck out.

470

: 00:18:39

And then Ricky Ricken shows up with

his lawyer and goes, Hey, Walker, long

471

: 00:18:43

time no see, which I feel like not a

lot of people know this, but the phrase

472

: 00:18:48

long time no see has racist roots.

473

: 00:18:51

mabel: No, really?

474

: 00:18:53

elaines money: It, it

475

: 00:18:53

mabel: Oh, is it supposed to be like

Native American broken English or,

476

: 00:18:57

elaines money: Not quite.

477

: 00:18:59

You're very close.

478

: 00:19:00

Uh, it is, yeah.

479

: 00:19:02

It's Chinese, broken

480

: 00:19:03

mabel: Uh, yeah.

481

: 00:19:04

elaines money: Um, it came

about, uh, in San Francisco, I

482

: 00:19:09

glo: makes sense.

483

: 00:19:10

elaines money: um, when there was

an influx of Asian integration,

484

: 00:19:13

um, in the early 19 hundreds.

485

: 00:19:15

And so it was making fun of, uh, the

Asian immigrants who came to America.

486

: 00:19:21

glo: Awesome.

487

: 00:19:22

elaines money: Sorry for this

really depressing history lesson.

488

: 00:19:24

mabel: Yeah, I think I kind of

kind of knew that like on a level,

489

: 00:19:29

but it's nice to have it confirmed

with actual facts in history.

490

: 00:19:33

glo: hmm.

491

: 00:19:35

elaines money: but anyway, so

Ricky Kins and Chucky D Nope.

492

: 00:19:39

Chucky n he's not a member of the BC Boys.

493

: 00:19:43

Um.

494

: 00:19:43

So, yeah, they, they kind of face

off in tough, macho bullshit.

495

: 00:19:49

Talk ensues.

496

: 00:19:50

I'm gonna tuck you down.

497

: 00:19:53

No, you're not.

498

: 00:19:54

I'm better than you.

499

: 00:19:56

Uh, pretend I have action figures

while I'm doing this 'cause

500

: 00:19:58

it's basically what it's like.

501

: 00:20:03

mabel: Mm-hmm.

502

: 00:20:04

elaines money: Uh, and then Walker and

Alex go talk to,, Raymond's mom, who

503

: 00:20:09

turns out to be Elaine Portugal, as we

said, which would be a great name for

504

: 00:20:14

a fem feal, uh, in a film noir from

back in the day Lakes came up to you.

505

: 00:20:22

My name is Elaine, Elaine Portugal.

506

: 00:20:25

She says around, you know,

her cigarette sticky thing,

507

: 00:20:28

glo: Agree.

508

: 00:20:29

mabel: Yeah, Elaine is doing a big, like,

oh, I'm such an innocent grandma act.

509

: 00:20:36

Uh, I didn't know there

was money laundering.

510

: 00:20:39

Well, I, I did know I was, you know,

I'm on social security and so I wanted

511

: 00:20:44

to be paid in cash so that nobody

would take my social security, reduced

512

: 00:20:49

my social Security, but I had no idea

there were crimes happening officers.

513

: 00:20:54

And at this moment I was just like,

yeah, she's, she's one of the bad guys

514

: 00:20:58

glo: Oh, yeah.

515

: 00:20:59

Saw right through that.

516

: 00:21:02

elaines money: I feel like all of

us, the bullshit meter was going

517

: 00:21:05

mabel: yeah, yeah.

518

: 00:21:05

But honestly, like this lady, like the

older lady living alone on some sort of

519

: 00:21:15

social security fixed income situation

is like a prime target for people looking

520

: 00:21:20

for money Mules these days, like yeah.

521

: 00:21:25

elaines money: there's not

enough social security.

522

: 00:21:27

Like people are not getting paid enough,

523

: 00:21:30

mabel: Yeah, and you get these

ads about like, do nothing,

524

: 00:21:35

work from home and make money.

525

: 00:21:38

And it's all just like, here, let us

run our money through your account.

526

: 00:21:41

Like we give you the money from

here and then you wire some of it

527

: 00:21:45

to here, but you keep some of it.

528

: 00:21:47

So you're just laundering for them.

529

: 00:21:51

You're their mule.

530

: 00:21:52

And

531

: 00:21:54

glo: yep.

532

: 00:21:54

mabel: uh, I've, I've seen it

before at one of the financial

533

: 00:21:58

institutions I worked at, yeah.

534

: 00:21:59

There was definitely an old lady

that we tried to explain to her like,

535

: 00:22:03

this thing you're doing is a crime.

536

: 00:22:07

And either, I don't know if she didn't

understand or was pressured in some

537

: 00:22:12

way, but ultimately it wound up with

just like we are closing your account

538

: 00:22:16

and turning you over to the FBI,

539

: 00:22:17

glo: Oh, wow.

540

: 00:22:19

elaines money: Oh

541

: 00:22:19

mabel: we have no other choice.

542

: 00:22:21

So.

543

: 00:22:22

glo: Wow.

544

: 00:22:23

mabel: Yeah, it's, it's really

sad because you, you can't tell at

545

: 00:22:26

some of the, some of the ages, like

how much they understand about the

546

: 00:22:33

way financial crimes have evolved,

547

: 00:22:36

elaines money: right.

548

: 00:22:38

And you know, I'm sure that there are

a lot of people who feel like they have

549

: 00:22:42

no choice because they're on this fixed

income, but they can't necessarily work.

550

: 00:22:48

And then the medical bills

keep piling up 'cause Medicaid

551

: 00:22:51

isn't covering them for a lot.

552

: 00:22:54

Like there were a lot of medications

when I worked at a dermatologist

553

: 00:22:58

that, you know, people needed.

554

: 00:23:01

And they couldn't get, because

Medicaid wouldn't cover

555

: 00:23:04

glo: Hmm.

556

: 00:23:05

mabel: Just like even the, the psychology

of it, you know, if they get this person

557

: 00:23:11

like in their ear on the phone, like

pressuring them to do things that they've

558

: 00:23:16

been told or bad things, but they don't.

559

: 00:23:20

Totally comprehend.

560

: 00:23:21

Like, I don't know.

561

: 00:23:22

He just, just happens.

562

: 00:23:25

But it's sad.

563

: 00:23:28

elaines money: exactly.

564

: 00:23:29

'cause if you, you know, it's that

perfect equation of I don't really

565

: 00:23:36

understand how this technology

works, and I also need money to get

566

: 00:23:40

these injections to make my eyeballs

567

: 00:23:43

glo: Hmm.

568

: 00:23:43

elaines money: That won't be

covered by insurance, like,

569

: 00:23:46

mabel: this is my job and that is my boss.

570

: 00:23:50

Yeah.

571

: 00:23:50

It's just,

572

: 00:23:51

elaines money: right.

573

: 00:23:52

mabel: uh, but you know, who's

not being duped by anything?

574

: 00:23:56

It's miscellaneous.

575

: 00:23:57

glo: Yep.

576

: 00:23:58

elaines money: Elaine

Portugal is a badass.

577

: 00:24:03

Uh, but they ask her to testify and

then like discuss it in a public hallway

578

: 00:24:11

after talking about how Ricky Ricks

has people killed on the re for less.

579

: 00:24:16

glo: Mm-hmm.

580

: 00:24:17

elaines money: uh, don't notice

the guy behind them on a fucking

581

: 00:24:20

payphone talking to Ricky Ricks.

582

: 00:24:23

glo: Yeah.

583

: 00:24:25

And we have this weird guy

who pops up all the time.

584

: 00:24:28

Do we wanna call him something?

585

: 00:24:31

mabel: I was calling him the tail.

586

: 00:24:32

glo: tail.

587

: 00:24:33

elaines money: Ah, that's so much better.

588

: 00:24:35

Yeah, mine was just cool shirt guy.

589

: 00:24:37

'cause like, I like his shirt.

590

: 00:24:39

It's real cool.

591

: 00:24:40

I want one.

592

: 00:24:41

glo: Okay.

593

: 00:24:41

mabel: I thought it was really funny

'cause like we have the Ricky Ricketts

594

: 00:24:44

Goon, who's like the first tail who's

like, yeah, I'm gonna go stalk her.

595

: 00:24:48

But then there's like

the tail of the tail,

596

: 00:24:52

glo: Yep.

597

: 00:24:53

mabel: is just this old guy

with a hat and like a coat.

598

: 00:24:56

glo: I think I

599

: 00:24:57

elaines money: It's the Spider-Man meme.

600

: 00:24:59

glo: right?

601

: 00:25:00

I think I put weird hat guy.

602

: 00:25:02

So he's like Cool shirt guy.

603

: 00:25:03

Weird hat guy.

604

: 00:25:04

The tail.

605

: 00:25:05

mabel: Mm-hmm.

606

: 00:25:08

glo: And for the audience,

607

: 00:25:09

elaines money: in the same band.

608

: 00:25:10

glo: right?

609

: 00:25:11

For the listener.

610

: 00:25:12

It's just a old dude with a cool

shirt and a hat and kind of weirdly

611

: 00:25:18

following everything and we're not

sure what he is until the very end.

612

: 00:25:22

mabel: Oh, I, I, at this point, I

was like, oh, that's her husband.

613

: 00:25:25

glo: Oh, interesting.

614

: 00:25:27

mabel: be the husband that

615

: 00:25:29

elaines money: that is what,

616

: 00:25:30

mabel: it hasn't happened yet, but she

several times mentions her dead husband

617

: 00:25:33

and I was like, it's gotta be that guy.

618

: 00:25:34

And it turns out I was not

right, but like close man.

619

: 00:25:38

elaines money: yeah.

620

: 00:25:39

Like that wa Yeah, that was

definitely my initial thought as well.

621

: 00:25:42

Um,

622

: 00:25:43

mabel: Yeah.

623

: 00:25:43

elaines money: I thought, yeah, I

thought he was trying to keep her safe,

624

: 00:25:46

mabel: yeah, I was like, okay.

625

: 00:25:47

He's like.

626

: 00:25:49

elaines money: I.

627

: 00:25:49

mabel: He, he's not dead clearly.

628

: 00:25:52

Maybe she left him and he's trying

to get her back or whatever.

629

: 00:25:55

So he's following, uh, I don't know,

but we get Walker going to, to Ricky's

630

: 00:26:00

warehouse and he's like poking around

with his boots at the fruit boxes

631

: 00:26:06

and finds a bunch of Bingo cards.

632

: 00:26:08

And then he goes to the bingo hall

again and finds the fruit boxes

633

: 00:26:13

full of bingo cards there too.

634

: 00:26:15

elaines money: And then picks

up a Bingo card and says, bingo.

635

: 00:26:18

So congratulations.

636

: 00:26:20

You can read.

637

: 00:26:21

mabel: I don't think

you can say bingo yet.

638

: 00:26:23

Walker, I think you're supposed to

save the bingo for like later in

639

: 00:26:28

the episode when you've cracked it.

640

: 00:26:30

You haven't cracked it yet.

641

: 00:26:32

elaines money: That's true.

642

: 00:26:34

But given that this man, oh, sorry.

643

: 00:26:37

Glow, you had a

644

: 00:26:37

glo: No, I just have a point of

order after we're done talking

645

: 00:26:40

about the bo, the boxes, the crates?

646

: 00:26:42

Yes.

647

: 00:26:44

elaines money: I was just gonna say, given

that this man sang his own theme song.

648

: 00:26:50

If you can call it that and

had a chorus of his own voice

649

: 00:26:55

instead of an actual chorus.

650

: 00:26:59

Partly 'cause he's an ego-centric weirdo.

651

: 00:27:03

And partly let's be real, because

if he had a chorus, an actual chorus

652

: 00:27:08

backing him up, it might be even

more glaring how bad he is at this.

653

: 00:27:11

Uh, you can't really

expect anymore from him.

654

: 00:27:14

What we what is your point of order?

655

: 00:27:17

glo: there is a new truck.

656

: 00:27:18

mabel: Oh, yes.

657

: 00:27:19

This show must

658

: 00:27:20

elaines money: a new

659

: 00:27:21

mabel: by GMC anymore.

660

: 00:27:22

He has a Dodge now.

661

: 00:27:24

glo: He has a Dodge Ram guys.

662

: 00:27:25

elaines money: yeah.

663

: 00:27:26

We're built Dodge ram tough.

664

: 00:27:28

Don't come at me.

665

: 00:27:29

I know that's Ford's damn.

666

: 00:27:32

mabel: I, I guess maybe

this was maybe the nineties.

667

: 00:27:35

We were all fighting over the rights to

be the truck in Walker, Texas Ranger.

668

: 00:27:40

I could see it.

669

: 00:27:41

glo: could see that too.

670

: 00:27:42

elaines money: I.

671

: 00:27:43

Yeah.

672

: 00:27:45

'cause I guess it was really popular.

673

: 00:27:47

Was there just not good

TV in the nineties?

674

: 00:27:54

glo: I mean, either, either that or

this show knows exactly what it is,

675

: 00:28:00

elaines money: Yeah.

676

: 00:28:01

glo: you know, and if it went on

for this many seasons, you know?

677

: 00:28:05

mabel: People knew exactly

what it was and they liked

678

: 00:28:08

glo: Mm-hmm.

679

: 00:28:09

We're also like in the golden age

of television, so looking back,

680

: 00:28:13

elaines money: no.

681

: 00:28:17

glo: not, not back

then, like now is is the

682

: 00:28:21

elaines money: Oh,

683

: 00:28:21

glo: of television.

684

: 00:28:23

Yeah.

685

: 00:28:23

No,

686

: 00:28:24

mabel: It was pretty good.

687

: 00:28:25

We got good

688

: 00:28:25

glo: we got some really good stuff.

689

: 00:28:27

elaines money: Yeah, we do

have good stuff all the time.

690

: 00:28:29

It's great to be

691

: 00:28:31

glo: back then is not the

golden age of television.

692

: 00:28:34

elaines money: That's what I

thought you were saying and I

693

: 00:28:35

was really upset for, I was like,

694

: 00:28:41

um,

695

: 00:28:42

mabel: so the tail is sitting outside.

696

: 00:28:44

I was confused.

697

: 00:28:46

I thought this was Elaine's house at

first, and then I thought maybe it's a WIS

698

: 00:28:49

witness protection apartment, and then it

seems like maybe it's Alex's apartment,

699

: 00:28:54

glo: I was, yep.

700

: 00:28:55

I was confused as well because Elaine

was making her dinner in Alex's house,

701

: 00:29:01

and honestly, like the way that it is

set up, like the house doesn't look

702

: 00:29:06

like a young person's house, but,

but we're also looking at eighties

703

: 00:29:12

decoration, which we kind of assume,

you know, associate with older fashion.

704

: 00:29:18

So maybe this was fashionable.

705

: 00:29:20

I don't know, dude.

706

: 00:29:22

mabel: I don't know.

707

: 00:29:23

But it's weird that

she's making dinner for.

708

: 00:29:27

Alex in Alex's kitchen and manages

to poison her in her own kitchen.

709

: 00:29:33

elaines money: Right.

710

: 00:29:34

She like roofies her with Matza ball soup,

which she explains like we aren't gonna

711

: 00:29:38

know what Matza ball soup is, which is

712

: 00:29:41

mabel: I mean, maybe they're thinking

like these people are from Texas and maybe

713

: 00:29:45

they've never met a Jewish person before.

714

: 00:29:48

elaines money: Are there

not Jewish people in Texas?

715

: 00:29:51

glo: I mean, I would say

they're probably not,

716

: 00:29:53

elaines money: a small,

717

: 00:29:54

mabel: would say it's probably not

a majority of the population, hun.

718

: 00:29:58

glo: yeah, it's def

719

: 00:29:59

elaines money: Oh, okay.

720

: 00:30:00

glo: not New York.

721

: 00:30:02

mabel: Right, right.

722

: 00:30:04

Well, and I wonder if the actress at

this point is like, I don't know, I'm

723

: 00:30:09

not gonna say like making it her mission,

but like spreading like awareness through

724

: 00:30:13

glo: Maybe.

725

: 00:30:14

mabel: the things that she's in of like

her Jewish culture and what have you.

726

: 00:30:19

I don't know.

727

: 00:30:20

elaines money: that's a possibility.

728

: 00:30:21

glo: Let's ask Vic, Hey, how many Jewish

people do you see down there in Texas?

729

: 00:30:27

elaines money: Yeah.

730

: 00:30:28

What's the Judaism situation?

731

: 00:30:30

You guys got Lakas, right?

732

: 00:30:33

mabel: I mean, everybody needs lacus

733

: 00:30:35

glo: Mm

734

: 00:30:35

elaines money: Everybody needs lakos, man.

735

: 00:30:37

glo: mm-hmm.

736

: 00:30:38

mabel: Yup.

737

: 00:30:40

elaines money: Maybe that's why everyone's

so cranky and shooting off guns down

738

: 00:30:42

there because they don't have lakas.

739

: 00:30:45

mabel: Could

740

: 00:30:45

glo: Lack of luck.

741

: 00:30:46

'cause

742

: 00:30:47

elaines money: Because lakas

equal endorphins as one L.

743

: 00:30:50

Woods would say.

744

: 00:30:51

mabel: And really sorry.

745

: 00:30:55

elaines money: Oh no, you go ahead.

746

: 00:30:56

mabel: And really Alex should

have eaten the lakas because this

747

: 00:30:59

maza ball soup, hella roofies,

748

: 00:31:02

elaines money: Yeah.

749

: 00:31:03

Hello Ru and the Matza Ball.

750

: 00:31:05

mabel: she gets very woozy,

has to lay down on the couch.

751

: 00:31:08

Um, and then Elaine is just like

out the door, like a gunshot.

752

: 00:31:13

glo: Kisses her forehead and pieces out.

753

: 00:31:16

mabel: Yeah.

754

: 00:31:17

And 'cause the tail had been outside.

755

: 00:31:19

I thought this was the tail

that comes after her, but it

756

: 00:31:22

turns out to be CD Parker.

757

: 00:31:24

elaines money: It came out to be.

758

: 00:31:25

And before though, before when they're

sitting down and um, Alex is still

759

: 00:31:30

upright and eating the roofed, matza

ball soup, uh, Elaine does kind of try

760

: 00:31:35

to play matchmaker a little bit and

then says, uh, Walker looks at Alex

761

: 00:31:43

like a wolf looking at a pork chop,

762

: 00:31:45

mabel: Gross.

763

: 00:31:47

elaines money: which is Yeah.

764

: 00:31:49

Ha.

765

: 00:31:50

mabel: I'm always here to

provide a gross regarding

766

: 00:31:54

elaines money: appreciate

767

: 00:31:55

mabel: any of the romantic

tension between Alex and Walker.

768

: 00:31:59

Gross.

769

: 00:32:00

elaines money: And it's not just,

'cause she's probably in her twenties

770

: 00:32:03

when he's, you know, a million a

771

: 00:32:06

glo: But also way out of his league.

772

: 00:32:08

Like,

773

: 00:32:10

elaines money: way out of his league.

774

: 00:32:11

mabel: Did did his haircut

get worse in this episode?

775

: 00:32:13

By the way?

776

: 00:32:14

glo: I don't

777

: 00:32:15

mabel: I need to, I need to ask this.

778

: 00:32:16

I feel like his haircut got worse

and I think he dies the beard.

779

: 00:32:21

elaines money: Oh, he

absolutely ties that beer, dude.

780

: 00:32:23

For

781

: 00:32:24

mabel: he is a very redheaded

man, and I do believe, it seems

782

: 00:32:27

like the redheaded man that the

beard goes gray faster than this.

783

: 00:32:32

Like, but it's a very

red, still doesn't look

784

: 00:32:36

glo: One thing I was gonna actually

posit to you guys, we all three of

785

: 00:32:40

us have living mothers, um, who, you

know, were, you know, probably in their

786

: 00:32:45

thirties or forties around the time

this came out, twenties, maybe even.

787

: 00:32:50

Um, I would actually like to know,

um, and if you guys will help me with

788

: 00:32:54

this, did women watching the show

find the leading man attractive or,

789

: 00:33:02

mabel: answer for my mother right

now and say she absolutely would

790

: 00:33:05

not have found Walker Texas Ranger

791

: 00:33:07

glo: Okay.

792

: 00:33:07

That's really interesting.

793

: 00:33:08

I'm gonna ask my mom.

794

: 00:33:09

I, I really kind of wanna know.

795

: 00:33:11

mabel: Yeah.

796

: 00:33:13

elaines money: So

797

: 00:33:15

glo: I.

798

: 00:33:15

elaines money: would, has never.

799

: 00:33:19

uh, been into or attracted to

or would watch a show with a

800

: 00:33:25

leading man who was this macho?

801

: 00:33:28

Uh, she does not suffer fools.

802

: 00:33:31

There is simply no way she would

ever find Chuck North attractive.

803

: 00:33:35

And there's simply no way she

would ever watch Walker Texas

804

: 00:33:38

glo: See now my mom definitely

did and, and bought a total gym

805

: 00:33:42

that now resides in my basement.

806

: 00:33:45

Um, so would like watch

the infomercials with him.

807

: 00:33:48

So I, I assume that she would

call him an attractive man.

808

: 00:33:54

Um, but, um, maybe we can even

put this out to our discord.

809

: 00:33:58

If you have a, a older female in your

life who would have been watching

810

: 00:34:03

this show when it aired, could

you just ask them, is Chuck Norris

811

: 00:34:08

or was Chuck Norris attractive?

812

: 00:34:11

I'm just

813

: 00:34:12

mabel: I, I would like

to know, yeah, please.

814

: 00:34:14

Post results.

815

: 00:34:15

I wanna know how it

816

: 00:34:16

glo: Yep.

817

: 00:34:17

elaines money: like to know, um, yes.

818

: 00:34:20

And also my mom was in her, yeah, she

would've been mid twenties when the

819

: 00:34:29

show came out, mid to early twenties, I

820

: 00:34:33

glo: My mom would've been in her thirties,

821

: 00:34:36

elaines money: Yeah.

822

: 00:34:37

glo: like our age, basically.

823

: 00:34:38

mabel: yeah, yeah.

824

: 00:34:40

elaines money: And she, yeah.

825

: 00:34:42

glo: I

826

: 00:34:42

elaines money: I don't know if my

mom watched TV during this time.

827

: 00:34:45

'cause she was in, yeah, she was in

law school and she was working 60

828

: 00:34:51

glo: Jesus.

829

: 00:34:53

mabel: Yeah.

830

: 00:34:53

elaines money: Yeah,

831

: 00:34:55

mabel: we, we never

watched this in my house.

832

: 00:34:57

Like

833

: 00:34:57

elaines money: going to karate actually.

834

: 00:34:59

glo: Whoa.

835

: 00:35:01

elaines money: Yeah,

836

: 00:35:01

glo: She was doing actual karate.

837

: 00:35:04

elaines money: doing actual karate.

838

: 00:35:05

Yes.

839

: 00:35:05

Like, uh, her, um, her instructor,

I think his name was Master U.

840

: 00:35:10

He would, um, he would,

he would stand on them.

841

: 00:35:14

While they did sit ups.

842

: 00:35:17

glo: Good for them?

843

: 00:35:17

mabel: I would die.

844

: 00:35:18

My organs would squish,

they would just squish out.

845

: 00:35:23

elaines money: She had two kids

and still has like ab definition.

846

: 00:35:26

Y'all like

847

: 00:35:26

mabel: know how, I didn't

have that before though, so

848

: 00:35:30

elaines money: Yeah, same.

849

: 00:35:31

glo: No way.

850

: 00:35:34

mabel: yeah, so CD gets Elaine back

and she, uh, does like assume CD knows

851

: 00:35:44

nothing about her food, but he knows

his luck is, and he's getting some luck.

852

: 00:35:49

elaines money: Yeah,

853

: 00:35:50

glo: Yep.

854

: 00:35:50

elaines money: because

again, Lakas are fantastic.

855

: 00:35:54

This is a, well really matza

ball soup is, is fantastic too.

856

: 00:36:00

mabel: Without the

roofies hold the roofies.

857

: 00:36:02

elaines money: hold the roofies.

858

: 00:36:04

Yeah.

859

: 00:36:05

glo: Now, did you guys find it

interesting that he lets Elaine flirt

860

: 00:36:10

with him when the other episode, it was

disgusting to him that Mabel, who is

861

: 00:36:17

about the same age as you know, this,

this actress, uh, was flirting with him.

862

: 00:36:23

So I, I just find that really interesting.

863

: 00:36:26

mabel: I think it's because

Mabel Brooks, none of his shit,

864

: 00:36:30

glo: Okay.

865

: 00:36:31

mabel: Mabel is not afraid

to call him out on stuff.

866

: 00:36:35

But Elaine is putting on her very

polite, submissive like I am a.

867

: 00:36:40

I'm just a granny act.

868

: 00:36:43

And so he's like down with that,

but he's not down with Mabel, like

869

: 00:36:47

being more aggressive, quote unquote.

870

: 00:36:51

glo: I, I,

871

: 00:36:52

elaines money: He wants a strong

lady or not a strong lady.

872

: 00:36:56

He wants one of them, you

know, submissive ladies.

873

: 00:36:59

mabel: the perfect lady.

874

: 00:37:01

Yeah.

875

: 00:37:03

I don't know.

876

: 00:37:04

Uh, but we get trivette now.

877

: 00:37:05

It's Trivette time

878

: 00:37:07

elaines money: Yay.

879

: 00:37:07

mabel: and he's, he's gonna give

us a rundown of Ricky Rickett's

880

: 00:37:11

scams, like, because the audience

needs it explained to us.

881

: 00:37:15

But Walker, Texas, ranger and Alex

already have this figured out, and

882

: 00:37:18

they're not sure why they're in this room.

883

: 00:37:21

elaines money: Yeah.

884

: 00:37:22

Um, they're like, trat has put

together this entire presentation.

885

: 00:37:27

He's even got a fruit box to

show everyone as an example.

886

: 00:37:31

He's really excited and they're

just sassing him the entire time.

887

: 00:37:36

They're just treating him like shit.

888

: 00:37:37

The whole time after this man worked so

hard to put together this presentation,

889

: 00:37:44

mabel: Yeah.

890

: 00:37:44

He got a big map in

891

: 00:37:47

elaines money: I know.

892

: 00:37:48

mabel: everything's mean.

893

: 00:37:50

elaines money: they don't deserve him.

894

: 00:37:52

Um, and then we learn that um,

Alex has had trat help her switch

895

: 00:38:00

trial venues to San Antonio because

maybe Rickett will have a harder

896

: 00:38:06

time getting a judge in his pocket.

897

: 00:38:08

And also people maybe don't know him as

well there, which is a pretty smart move.

898

: 00:38:14

I mean, I think that is

something that I would do

899

: 00:38:17

mabel: I noticed in this episode

that Walker said San Antonio,

900

: 00:38:20

like a normal person this time.

901

: 00:38:22

But in our previous episode, I

think I forgot to hate on it when

902

: 00:38:25

he said San an Antonio, which

I've never heard anyone ever say,

903

: 00:38:30

glo: Yep.

904

: 00:38:31

elaines money: And then CD

said San Antonio this episode,

905

: 00:38:33

mabel: oh, Diddy, well CD's an old,

so maybe olds do different stuff.

906

: 00:38:40

elaines money: maybe.

907

: 00:38:42

Well, so is Walker though.

908

: 00:38:44

mabel: Ah, true, true.

909

: 00:38:46

But he gets a pass this time

'cause he said it in a normal way.

910

: 00:38:49

So thanks finally, God.

911

: 00:38:52

elaines money: only time Chuck

Doris gets a pass on this podcast.

912

: 00:38:57

mabel: the only one.

913

: 00:39:00

elaines money: Um, but yeah, so

Walker goes to get Elaine, who is

914

: 00:39:04

charming, all of the fellas in the

office with her tailor knowledge.

915

: 00:39:09

Um, and she tries to get

him to date Alex in the car

916

: 00:39:15

mabel: Mm-hmm.

917

: 00:39:16

elaines money: and have kids

with her and everything.

918

: 00:39:18

And he says, maybe someday,

919

: 00:39:20

glo: You're 50.

920

: 00:39:21

You're 50.

921

: 00:39:23

elaines money: exactly

922

: 00:39:24

mabel: Well, but if she is

young, it doesn't matter.

923

: 00:39:25

'cause she can do all the work.

924

: 00:39:27

glo: damn,

925

: 00:39:28

elaines money: Well, that like the

older that the men folk get too,

926

: 00:39:33

like the more health risks there are

927

: 00:39:35

mabel: Well, that's true.

928

: 00:39:36

That's true.

929

: 00:39:37

glo: swimmers.

930

: 00:39:38

elaines money: Yeah, the swimmers

and at his gigantic age, those

931

: 00:39:44

swimmers, they need walkers.

932

: 00:39:47

All right.

933

: 00:39:50

Ha ha.

934

: 00:39:51

glo: also says, I'm a lone wolf.

935

: 00:39:53

I like to live alone.

936

: 00:39:55

And I'm like, doesn't

he live with Uncle Ray?

937

: 00:39:57

Am I wrong?

938

: 00:39:58

mabel: Well, this is

939

: 00:39:59

elaines money: I

940

: 00:39:59

mabel: different house.

941

: 00:40:00

This is a totally different

942

: 00:40:01

glo: Okay, you're right.

943

: 00:40:03

mabel: And so I'm like,

where is Uncle Ray?

944

: 00:40:05

I kinda miss

945

: 00:40:06

glo: I do Miss Uncle Ray.

946

: 00:40:08

elaines money: like, I'm kind

of wondering, here's my theory.

947

: 00:40:12

Um, I think maybe there was a

lot of backlash for the half

948

: 00:40:19

Cherokee white guy storyline.

949

: 00:40:22

mabel: maybe,

950

: 00:40:23

elaines money: Um, and the, yeah,

the magical shaman bullshit.

951

: 00:40:30

And maybe there was enough backlash

that they just kind of like

952

: 00:40:34

wrote Uncle Ray out altogether.

953

: 00:40:37

glo: Maybe

954

: 00:40:38

mabel: Yeah.

955

: 00:40:38

I don't

956

: 00:40:38

elaines money: Just pretended

that he didn't exist.

957

: 00:40:40

Kind of like James Bond does with

958

: 00:40:42

glo: That could be somebody's

good, better, best, think about it.

959

: 00:40:46

elaines money: but yeah, and so they

drive up to, I thought it was CD's House

960

: 00:40:52

because it was a different house, but

yeah, it turns out it was Walker's house.

961

: 00:40:56

Um, and then CD and again,

CD uses Walker's Kitchen to

962

: 00:41:00

cook, so I thought it was

963

: 00:41:02

mabel: Yeah.

964

: 00:41:02

Everybody just cooks in

everybody's kitchen, which

965

: 00:41:04

actually kind of sounds magical.

966

: 00:41:06

Can we just all cook in

each other's kitchens?

967

: 00:41:09

elaines money: As long as other people

do the cleanup, that would be great.

968

: 00:41:11

mabel: Sure.

969

: 00:41:12

Yeah.

970

: 00:41:12

Yeah.

971

: 00:41:13

They were trying to get travet

to do the cleanup, but he was

972

: 00:41:15

like, no, I have real work to do.

973

: 00:41:17

I have an actual job, guys.

974

: 00:41:19

elaines money: exactly.

975

: 00:41:20

mabel: But Elaine gives cd some like cole

slaw tips and like, your cole slaw was

976

: 00:41:24

great, but here's how it can be better.

977

: 00:41:29

elaines money: And then I'm kind of

sitting there at that point thinking,

978

: 00:41:32

man, I don't wanna say it like this, but I

hope her and her husband aren't together.

979

: 00:41:37

'cause like I'd be okay with her and

CD like, you know, being a couple, they

980

: 00:41:43

seem like they have a lot of interests.

981

: 00:41:46

mabel: So Walker goes to retire

and Sadie sits on the front porch

982

: 00:41:51

and Elaine is pretending to retire.

983

: 00:41:53

But then she goes and grabs the

keys to the Dodge and uh, tricks

984

: 00:41:58

CD until leaving the porch.

985

: 00:42:00

'cause she's like, oh, I can't sleep.

986

: 00:42:01

I just wanna sit with you.

987

: 00:42:03

But I'd love some hot tea.

988

: 00:42:05

glo: Mm-hmm.

989

: 00:42:07

elaines money: I brought you this blankie.

990

: 00:42:10

mabel: Mm-hmm.

991

: 00:42:11

elaines money: Um, so he's all

like, or I'll go make the tea honey.

992

: 00:42:14

And she's like, oh, that's so nasty.

993

: 00:42:18

And then he goes inside

and she books it to the

994

: 00:42:21

glo: And Ricketts men are just there.

995

: 00:42:23

elaines money: Yeah,

996

: 00:42:24

mabel: goons have found

the new Walker house.

997

: 00:42:28

glo: Yeah.

998

: 00:42:28

elaines money: they've teleported

to the new walker house.

999

: 00:42:31

mabel: You know what's really

funny about this scene though?

: 1000

00:42:34,256 --> 00:42:34,616

Okay.

: 1001

00:42:34,616 --> 00:42:39,356

So of course, because this is Walker's

house, immediately these goons, you

: 1002

00:42:39,356 --> 00:42:43,136

know, she gets some screams out and CD

and Walker come running and whatever.

: 1003

00:42:43,976 --> 00:42:49,826

Uh, but Walker, Texas Ranger did

not like get undressed at all.

: 1004

00:42:49,826 --> 00:42:51,686

He's still wearing everything.

: 1005

00:42:51,686 --> 00:42:55,766

He was gonna go to bed and it would've

been kind of funny to see him, like in his

: 1006

00:42:55,766 --> 00:42:58,166

bathrobe, throwing the kicks or something.

: 1007

00:42:58,736 --> 00:43:01,556

Like, I don't wanna see like

boxers or, no thank you.

: 1008

00:43:01,556 --> 00:43:04,061

But it could have been

pretty funny if he was like.

: 1009

00:43:04,751 --> 00:43:06,136

Halfway dressed for bed.

: 1010

00:43:06,576 --> 00:43:08,556

glo: Oh, Walker's a tidy whitey guy.

: 1011

00:43:08,621 --> 00:43:08,681

elaines money: Yeah.

: 1012

00:43:09,666 --> 00:43:10,196

glo: Come on.

: 1013

00:43:10,211 --> 00:43:10,481

elaines money: He,

: 1014

00:43:11,141 --> 00:43:15,761

glo: There's no way he has boxers on or

he's string following it with nothing.

: 1015

00:43:18,911 --> 00:43:20,111

See, come on.

: 1016

00:43:20,231 --> 00:43:23,321

elaines money: needs support for

his old ram balls, don't they?

: 1017

00:43:23,321 --> 00:43:23,891

Droop.

: 1018

00:43:25,001 --> 00:43:25,301

glo: guys?

: 1019

00:43:25,301 --> 00:43:27,221

He has to get those kicks up really high.

: 1020

00:43:28,211 --> 00:43:30,281

mabel: he does have to

get him up really high.

: 1021

00:43:31,181 --> 00:43:33,191

elaines money: And then,

you know, everything's just

: 1022

00:43:33,191 --> 00:43:35,111

drooping, like, it's like a bra.

: 1023

00:43:35,111 --> 00:43:36,671

You gotta, you gotta have support.

: 1024

00:43:37,961 --> 00:43:39,071

gravity does its work.

: 1025

00:43:39,071 --> 00:43:40,271

mabel: underwire, tidy weight?

: 1026

00:43:41,726 --> 00:43:41,846

glo: Oh,

: 1027

00:43:42,456 --> 00:43:42,676

elaines money: Uh.

: 1028

00:43:42,956 --> 00:43:44,966

glo: he is just always

wearing a jack strap.

: 1029

00:43:44,966 --> 00:43:46,076

Just all the time.

: 1030

00:43:47,136 --> 00:43:47,786

elaines money: Just in case.

: 1031

00:43:47,976 --> 00:43:50,621

It's just him throwing kicks

and nothing but a jock.

: 1032

00:43:50,621 --> 00:43:50,921

Strap

: 1033

00:43:52,776 --> 00:43:53,066

mabel: Stop.

: 1034

00:43:53,616 --> 00:43:53,906

Stop.

: 1035

00:44:01,001 --> 00:44:04,061

elaines money: ass cheeks

just flapping in the breeze.

: 1036

00:44:04,191 --> 00:44:06,041

mabel: you know, he has really hairy ass

: 1037

00:44:06,266 --> 00:44:06,776

glo: Oh,

: 1038

00:44:07,991 --> 00:44:09,071

elaines money: and they're red.

: 1039

00:44:09,251 --> 00:44:10,601

It's either red or gray.

: 1040

00:44:10,601 --> 00:44:11,261

Probably a mixture.

: 1041

00:44:15,176 --> 00:44:18,416

mabel: Anyway, it could have been

funny in a bathrobe at least, right?

: 1042

00:44:18,446 --> 00:44:19,346

Because you could have

: 1043

00:44:19,376 --> 00:44:21,176

elaines money: bathrobe

would've been hilarious.

: 1044

00:44:21,536 --> 00:44:25,076

mabel: it gets all flappy and stuff,

and, and then it could be like

: 1045

00:44:25,076 --> 00:44:29,756

slightly, slightly ajar at the end and

he like rushes to cover himself up.

: 1046

00:44:29,756 --> 00:44:30,686

That would be pretty funny.

: 1047

00:44:31,766 --> 00:44:34,556

elaines money: And he is got

like those cartoon boxers

: 1048

00:44:34,556 --> 00:44:35,726

on, you know, with the little

: 1049

00:44:35,951 --> 00:44:36,371

glo: Mm-hmm.

: 1050

00:44:36,806 --> 00:44:37,646

That would be funny.

: 1051

00:44:38,141 --> 00:44:39,401

mabel: That would be funny.

: 1052

00:44:39,641 --> 00:44:40,031

All right.

: 1053

00:44:40,031 --> 00:44:40,871

We just fixed it.

: 1054

00:44:40,871 --> 00:44:41,441

We fixed it

: 1055

00:44:41,606 --> 00:44:42,566

glo: I'm okay with that.

: 1056

00:44:43,886 --> 00:44:43,946

elaines money: it.

: 1057

00:44:43,946 --> 00:44:46,166

Chuck Norris takes himself

too seriously, though.

: 1058

00:44:46,166 --> 00:44:46,526

Let's be

: 1059

00:44:46,676 --> 00:44:51,326

glo: If, if anybody would like to make

some fan Art of Walker, Texas Ranger in

: 1060

00:44:51,386 --> 00:44:54,866

Valentine's boxers, that would be amazing.

: 1061

00:44:54,866 --> 00:44:55,406

Thank you.

: 1062

00:44:56,111 --> 00:44:56,411

mabel: Yeah.

: 1063

00:44:56,711 --> 00:44:57,911

But also a bathrobe

: 1064

00:44:58,106 --> 00:44:58,346

glo: Yeah.

: 1065

00:44:58,346 --> 00:44:59,336

And a and a bathrobe.

: 1066

00:44:59,336 --> 00:44:59,666

Yes.

: 1067

00:44:59,841 --> 00:45:00,131

elaines money: Yeah.

: 1068

00:45:00,308 --> 00:45:00,848

mabel: Okay.

: 1069

00:45:00,848 --> 00:45:01,208

Yeah.

: 1070

00:45:01,208 --> 00:45:01,718

So

: 1071

00:45:01,828 --> 00:45:02,248

elaines money: anyway,

: 1072

00:45:02,678 --> 00:45:03,848

mabel: these guys don't get it.

: 1073

00:45:03,908 --> 00:45:10,058

They don't, they don't get Elaine and,

uh, Walker and Trivette are kind of

: 1074

00:45:10,058 --> 00:45:13,898

putting it together like, oh, she's

still got something that Ricky wants.

: 1075

00:45:13,898 --> 00:45:16,298

Like, he's not just

afraid of her testimony.

: 1076

00:45:16,298 --> 00:45:18,158

Like, there's something else

: 1077

00:45:18,158 --> 00:45:19,328

elaines money: Like, yeah.

: 1078

00:45:19,688 --> 00:45:23,198

And she runs back into the house while

Walker and everybody's like arresting

: 1079

00:45:23,558 --> 00:45:27,188

everyone and she like peeks out and

she kind of goes, oh, Walker, you're

: 1080

00:45:27,188 --> 00:45:29,288

gonna be a bigger problem than rickets.

: 1081

00:45:29,768 --> 00:45:32,678

And at that point I was kind

of thinking maybe she was the

: 1082

00:45:32,678 --> 00:45:34,868

big cheese, but I was wrong,

: 1083

00:45:35,033 --> 00:45:37,073

mabel: Yeah, I was like,

is she the mastermind?

: 1084

00:45:37,073 --> 00:45:38,903

Because that would be pretty cool too.

: 1085

00:45:38,903 --> 00:45:39,473

Like

: 1086

00:45:41,633 --> 00:45:45,863

Ricky Ricketts is just like the face man

and she's the real brains of everything.

: 1087

00:45:46,283 --> 00:45:47,003

Hell yeah.

: 1088

00:45:49,478 --> 00:45:49,988

elaines money: But yeah.

: 1089

00:45:49,988 --> 00:45:54,218

And then so they're having this

conversation about how things are

: 1090

00:45:54,218 --> 00:45:57,188

hinky and it's weird that he's

letting her live and clearly he wants

: 1091

00:45:57,188 --> 00:45:59,288

something out of her, as Laura said.

: 1092

00:45:59,768 --> 00:46:04,808

Um, and then they see Ricky Ricketts

across the parking lot, walk over

: 1093

00:46:04,808 --> 00:46:11,408

to him, and Walker immediately

just assaults his driver, just like

: 1094

00:46:12,638 --> 00:46:15,668

cracks his wrist and holds him there.

: 1095

00:46:15,728 --> 00:46:21,968

And the lawyer of Ricky Ricketts is

like, Hey man, you can't do that.

: 1096

00:46:21,998 --> 00:46:23,468

Rightfully so.

: 1097

00:46:23,828 --> 00:46:30,668

And Walker responds with, this is not

a courthouse, this is a parking lot.

: 1098

00:46:31,058 --> 00:46:32,678

There are no rules.

: 1099

00:46:32,738 --> 00:46:34,988

So you heard it here first.

: 1100

00:46:36,108 --> 00:46:36,328

glo: Uh,

: 1101

00:46:36,668 --> 00:46:40,448

mabel: the rule of law is everywhere

except the parking lot folks.

: 1102

00:46:40,448 --> 00:46:40,928

elaines money: Yes.

: 1103

00:46:41,588 --> 00:46:43,718

No, no doubt you can't.

: 1104

00:46:43,958 --> 00:46:47,468

There are no rules in any

San Antonio parking lot.

: 1105

00:46:47,678 --> 00:46:50,858

Tell Vic he can dangle his

feet in the parking lot

: 1106

00:46:51,188 --> 00:46:52,648

glo: and San Antone.

: 1107

00:46:52,864 --> 00:46:53,254

elaines money: San

: 1108

00:46:53,329 --> 00:46:56,359

mabel: I think we're still in Dallas

at this point, but it doesn't matter.

: 1109

00:46:56,689 --> 00:46:57,559

It's whatever.

: 1110

00:46:57,619 --> 00:46:59,059

Yeah, in Texas.

: 1111

00:46:59,569 --> 00:47:00,409

Parking lots.

: 1112

00:47:00,889 --> 00:47:04,219

glo: oh, right, because we haven't

gotten the, the goodbye kiss yet.

: 1113

00:47:04,356 --> 00:47:04,926

mabel: Yeah,

: 1114

00:47:05,121 --> 00:47:05,871

elaines money: Oh shit.

: 1115

00:47:05,871 --> 00:47:08,391

The goodbye kiss was fire.

: 1116

00:47:08,961 --> 00:47:10,221

Um, yes.

: 1117

00:47:10,896 --> 00:47:11,556

mabel: I love it.

: 1118

00:47:11,556 --> 00:47:16,206

So she gets cd, like she's buttering up

to cd 'cause she's found out like, oh,

: 1119

00:47:16,206 --> 00:47:18,036

they're gonna take me down to San Antonio.

: 1120

00:47:18,036 --> 00:47:19,176

I don't wanna go.

: 1121

00:47:19,746 --> 00:47:23,616

And he's like, Sadie's like, don't worry,

Walker's gonna be on the plane with

: 1122

00:47:23,616 --> 00:47:25,566

you and he's gonna be there whole time.

: 1123

00:47:25,566 --> 00:47:26,376

It's gonna be fine.

: 1124

00:47:27,006 --> 00:47:30,036

And she's just like, oh, I'd

rather go with you, Sadie.

: 1125

00:47:30,036 --> 00:47:38,376

And so she gets a goodbye kiss and

she like full on, makes out with him.

: 1126

00:47:38,376 --> 00:47:40,656

He's doing the like flay arms,

: 1127

00:47:40,686 --> 00:47:41,136

glo: Mm-hmm.

: 1128

00:47:41,526 --> 00:47:47,676

mabel: like he can't even control

this, this kiss and this woman.

: 1129

00:47:47,706 --> 00:47:48,246

And.

: 1130

00:47:48,876 --> 00:47:50,076

It's very funny

: 1131

00:47:51,036 --> 00:47:53,166

elaines money: It's very funny,

but like after it, like she

: 1132

00:47:53,166 --> 00:47:54,696

totally knocked his socks off.

: 1133

00:47:54,696 --> 00:47:56,076

Like he can't even talk.

: 1134

00:47:56,076 --> 00:47:58,446

He's just like, sh woo.

: 1135

00:47:59,191 --> 00:47:59,481

Like,

: 1136

00:48:02,166 --> 00:48:04,471

mabel: and Walker Texas Rangers

in the background, like, whoa,

: 1137

00:48:06,096 --> 00:48:07,836

elaines money: why is she

not making out with me?

: 1138

00:48:08,466 --> 00:48:11,046

I am the one who is the star of the show.

: 1139

00:48:11,106 --> 00:48:12,216

I sing,

: 1140

00:48:13,231 --> 00:48:13,451

glo: Yep.

: 1141

00:48:15,066 --> 00:48:15,636

elaines money: what does he do?

: 1142

00:48:15,636 --> 00:48:19,506

Make chili and no vodkas,

and eat hot chip and lie.

: 1143

00:48:26,001 --> 00:48:30,381

Um, but then they get to the airport

and Elena's all like, I go, go

: 1144

00:48:30,381 --> 00:48:37,071

potty and, uh, basically talks a

lady in the bathroom out of her hat

: 1145

00:48:37,071 --> 00:48:41,691

and jacket and then sneaks away.

: 1146

00:48:42,321 --> 00:48:49,161

Um, but Walker catches her before she

gets into a taxi and cool shirt guy or

: 1147

00:48:49,161 --> 00:48:55,731

the tail, or a cool hat guy is, uh, has

followed them out and is eating a donut.

: 1148

00:48:55,851 --> 00:48:57,891

Kind of slowly, but also slowly.

: 1149

00:48:57,891 --> 00:49:00,321

I was very confused by

the eating of this donut.

: 1150

00:49:01,926 --> 00:49:05,856

glo: But now, now she is had

enough of a diversion where

: 1151

00:49:05,856 --> 00:49:07,986

they cannot make the flight.

: 1152

00:49:07,986 --> 00:49:10,751

So now Walker has to drive a lane.

: 1153

00:49:11,376 --> 00:49:11,586

To

: 1154

00:49:11,841 --> 00:49:14,601

mabel: Hey, remember airports that

you could just like walk into?

: 1155

00:49:14,646 --> 00:49:14,916

glo: Whew.

: 1156

00:49:16,041 --> 00:49:16,551

mabel: Wow,

: 1157

00:49:18,651 --> 00:49:19,521

what a thing.

: 1158

00:49:21,231 --> 00:49:22,791

There's like no security.

: 1159

00:49:22,791 --> 00:49:24,681

They just go, wow.

: 1160

00:49:26,091 --> 00:49:26,331

Wow.

: 1161

00:49:26,391 --> 00:49:27,471

What a, what a time.

: 1162

00:49:27,561 --> 00:49:28,786

What a world, what?

: 1163

00:49:30,096 --> 00:49:31,596

elaines money: I still

think that's made up.

: 1164

00:49:32,091 --> 00:49:32,911

He can't tell.

: 1165

00:49:35,556 --> 00:49:37,506

Um, but yeah.

: 1166

00:49:37,596 --> 00:49:44,586

And so, uh, anyway, at this point, fair

had walked into the room and Rickett

: 1167

00:49:44,586 --> 00:49:49,986

Goon sees Walker and Elaine talk about

how they're gonna drive to San Ter.

: 1168

00:49:51,066 --> 00:49:54,036

And uh, he gets on the phone with

Rickett and then Rickett comes on the

: 1169

00:49:54,036 --> 00:49:56,106

screen and Shafer goes, I know him.

: 1170

00:49:57,036 --> 00:49:57,066

glo: Oh,

: 1171

00:49:57,456 --> 00:49:59,136

elaines money: And I'm like, oh.

: 1172

00:49:59,286 --> 00:50:00,606

And he's like, yeah.

: 1173

00:50:00,606 --> 00:50:03,996

And I'm like, oh, but picture him older.

: 1174

00:50:03,996 --> 00:50:05,526

And he was like, yes.

: 1175

00:50:05,976 --> 00:50:10,716

He was in Mulholland Drive

and he was in Twin Peaks and

: 1176

00:50:10,716 --> 00:50:12,696

we're both David Lynch nerds.

: 1177

00:50:13,056 --> 00:50:15,186

So we were aware.

: 1178

00:50:15,486 --> 00:50:15,786

Yeah.

: 1179

00:50:15,831 --> 00:50:16,131

glo: Neat.

: 1180

00:50:16,866 --> 00:50:17,226

mabel: cool.

: 1181

00:50:17,976 --> 00:50:22,446

elaines money: Um, but anyway, so,

and his name is Robert Forrester.

: 1182

00:50:23,046 --> 00:50:30,306

Um, but yeah, so, um, Walker

doesn't tell Trat at all that this

: 1183

00:50:30,306 --> 00:50:33,396

is their change of plans, even

though he has a car phone and could

: 1184

00:50:33,516 --> 00:50:34,416

mabel: Yeah, clearly.

: 1185

00:50:34,536 --> 00:50:35,046

elaines money: just waiting.

: 1186

00:50:35,136 --> 00:50:35,496

Yeah.

: 1187

00:50:37,206 --> 00:50:40,836

Uh, and I kind of don't like that

he doesn't take Ette seriously

: 1188

00:50:40,866 --> 00:50:42,276

because he is his partner.

: 1189

00:50:42,306 --> 00:50:44,976

He's not somebody he can

just fridge anytime he wants.

: 1190

00:50:45,006 --> 00:50:45,366

mabel: Right.

: 1191

00:50:45,486 --> 00:50:48,366

He's waiting at the airport

for literally no reason.

: 1192

00:50:48,426 --> 00:50:53,466

Like he could be at the courthouse,

he could be like doing stuff,

: 1193

00:50:54,186 --> 00:50:54,726

elaines money: Yeah.

: 1194

00:50:54,846 --> 00:50:59,076

mabel: is got dudes there with him, like

those dudes could be doing other stuff.

: 1195

00:50:59,526 --> 00:51:03,636

elaines money: there's a lot of allocation

of resources that walker's just kind

: 1196

00:51:03,636 --> 00:51:09,006

of like shirking by not telling anyone,

you know, Hey, this was our change of

: 1197

00:51:09,036 --> 00:51:10,986

glo: Waste, fraud and abuse, guys.

: 1198

00:51:12,061 --> 00:51:12,351

mabel: Yeah.

: 1199

00:51:12,576 --> 00:51:12,996

glo: Hmm.

: 1200

00:51:13,431 --> 00:51:15,081

elaines money: The Walker,

Texas Ranger story.

: 1201

00:51:15,531 --> 00:51:21,291

Um, but yeah, and so Elaine is in

the car with Walker and they're

: 1202

00:51:21,291 --> 00:51:23,301

about an hour away from San Antonio.

: 1203

00:51:23,301 --> 00:51:26,031

'cause vet calls him like the fuck dude.

: 1204

00:51:26,631 --> 00:51:31,671

And um, Elaine's like, I got pee

and Walker's like, no you don't.

: 1205

00:51:31,821 --> 00:51:34,461

And she's like, no, I

really got penis time.

: 1206

00:51:35,691 --> 00:51:42,831

And so, um, he takes her to a little

gas station and she goes to the

: 1207

00:51:42,831 --> 00:51:44,271

bathroom and she's all like, trust

: 1208

00:51:44,571 --> 00:51:47,391

mabel: She definitely really went to

the bathroom this time though, right?

: 1209

00:51:47,391 --> 00:51:47,811

Like

: 1210

00:51:48,801 --> 00:51:49,071

elaines money: To,

: 1211

00:51:49,101 --> 00:51:51,321

mabel: an old lady, like she

went to the bathroom and then

: 1212

00:51:51,321 --> 00:51:53,181

she did the, the escapees.

: 1213

00:51:53,331 --> 00:51:53,571

Yeah,

: 1214

00:51:54,596 --> 00:51:54,996

elaines money: probably right?

: 1215

00:51:55,856 --> 00:51:57,951

I mean, there's only so long

you can go without peeing.

: 1216

00:51:58,071 --> 00:51:58,401

mabel: yeah.

: 1217

00:51:58,461 --> 00:51:59,721

Like I couldn't do this.

: 1218

00:52:00,681 --> 00:52:01,821

elaines money: I couldn't either.

: 1219

00:52:03,951 --> 00:52:07,251

I'm diabetic though,

so I pee all the time.

: 1220

00:52:07,341 --> 00:52:08,571

Always be peeing.

: 1221

00:52:09,741 --> 00:52:16,761

Um, but yeah, so she hops out of

the window and walker's right there.

: 1222

00:52:17,631 --> 00:52:20,721

Um, and she screams.

: 1223

00:52:21,291 --> 00:52:22,761

mabel: it's a good scream.

: 1224

00:52:23,061 --> 00:52:24,051

elaines money: It's a, yeah,

: 1225

00:52:24,081 --> 00:52:25,461

mabel: She did a good scream.

: 1226

00:52:25,911 --> 00:52:26,361

elaines money: yeah.

: 1227

00:52:26,421 --> 00:52:27,531

It's a scream queen

: 1228

00:52:27,681 --> 00:52:28,911

mabel: is a professional.

: 1229

00:52:29,271 --> 00:52:30,531

elaines money: She is.

: 1230

00:52:30,711 --> 00:52:33,411

glo: is such a caper now

that I wrote in my notes.

: 1231

00:52:33,411 --> 00:52:34,971

This episode is delightful.

: 1232

00:52:34,971 --> 00:52:37,371

It's just, it's just fun, you know?

: 1233

00:52:38,451 --> 00:52:43,161

mabel: I kind of like to see

Walker get like some comeuppance

: 1234

00:52:43,161 --> 00:52:45,111

from this little older lady, like

: 1235

00:52:45,291 --> 00:52:45,951

glo: very fun.

: 1236

00:52:46,611 --> 00:52:48,411

mabel: outsmarting him a few times.

: 1237

00:52:48,411 --> 00:52:49,161

It's pretty fun.

: 1238

00:52:49,161 --> 00:52:49,611

Yeah,

: 1239

00:52:49,881 --> 00:52:50,781

elaines money: It's fun.

: 1240

00:52:50,991 --> 00:52:51,441

Yeah.

: 1241

00:52:51,471 --> 00:52:54,951

Also, I feel like this episode

had more Elaine and a little

: 1242

00:52:54,951 --> 00:52:57,681

less walker doing his own thing.

: 1243

00:52:57,681 --> 00:53:00,261

And again, I just feel like

this show would be better

: 1244

00:53:00,261 --> 00:53:01,821

without Walker, Texas Ranger.

: 1245

00:53:02,216 --> 00:53:02,436

glo: Yep.

: 1246

00:53:02,931 --> 00:53:03,831

mabel: yeah, yeah.

: 1247

00:53:04,191 --> 00:53:09,741

So as the, as he's catching her,

we get drive by Gooning and,

: 1248

00:53:11,876 --> 00:53:12,096

glo: Yes.

: 1249

00:53:12,246 --> 00:53:13,076

elaines money: can't say that.

: 1250

00:53:14,271 --> 00:53:18,261

mabel: and the goons like sort of.

: 1251

00:53:18,816 --> 00:53:20,196

You know, get, get some of them.

: 1252

00:53:20,196 --> 00:53:22,926

Walker gets two of the

goons, not the third.

: 1253

00:53:23,886 --> 00:53:24,546

And

: 1254

00:53:24,861 --> 00:53:25,101

elaines money: so we're clear.

: 1255

00:53:25,101 --> 00:53:28,641

She's talking about

henchmen drive by Hench

: 1256

00:53:28,641 --> 00:53:32,871

glo: is the millennial understanding

of Gooning, not the Gen Z.

: 1257

00:53:33,261 --> 00:53:33,771

Yes.

: 1258

00:53:35,046 --> 00:53:38,196

mabel: I use it on purpose

'cause I think it's funny

: 1259

00:53:38,541 --> 00:53:39,741

elaines money: it's very funny.

: 1260

00:53:42,066 --> 00:53:48,426

mabel: and uh, Elaine in the chaos

steals like a delivery truck and we

: 1261

00:53:48,426 --> 00:53:50,796

see the tail take off after her truck.

: 1262

00:53:51,426 --> 00:53:54,936

Uh, she does this cute thing where

she's like, breaker, breaker,

: 1263

00:53:55,046 --> 00:53:55,846

elaines money: I loved that.

: 1264

00:53:56,286 --> 00:53:57,816

mabel: where are all the cops at?

: 1265

00:53:57,816 --> 00:54:01,866

You know, and gets somebody on

the horn telling her, don't worry,

: 1266

00:54:01,866 --> 00:54:04,416

you're clear up till wherever.

: 1267

00:54:05,391 --> 00:54:06,741

elaines money: It's so cute.

: 1268

00:54:06,996 --> 00:54:07,386

mabel: Yeah.

: 1269

00:54:07,806 --> 00:54:09,306

I was like, go girl.

: 1270

00:54:09,981 --> 00:54:12,501

elaines money: I know she used

all the like trucker s slang

: 1271

00:54:12,501 --> 00:54:14,661

and stuff too, like it was bomb.

: 1272

00:54:15,621 --> 00:54:17,361

Um, but yeah.

: 1273

00:54:17,541 --> 00:54:22,341

And so then Walker calls Yvette to

see if he's come across anything

: 1274

00:54:22,341 --> 00:54:24,351

about Elaine and he says no.

: 1275

00:54:24,351 --> 00:54:27,861

But her husband Irving was

arrested the week prior for

: 1276

00:54:27,861 --> 00:54:30,111

passing bad checks in Kansas City,

: 1277

00:54:31,191 --> 00:54:31,976

mabel: The dead one.

: 1278

00:54:32,031 --> 00:54:32,901

elaines money: wild.

: 1279

00:54:32,931 --> 00:54:33,201

Yeah.

: 1280

00:54:33,921 --> 00:54:35,691

'cause how is he dead?

: 1281

00:54:36,741 --> 00:54:40,041

But also cashing bad checks?

: 1282

00:54:40,716 --> 00:54:40,936

mabel: Ah.

: 1283

00:54:41,271 --> 00:54:42,561

elaines money: Is he Jesus?

: 1284

00:54:42,951 --> 00:54:43,971

Is he fraud?

: 1285

00:54:43,971 --> 00:54:44,841

Jesus.

: 1286

00:54:48,381 --> 00:54:52,131

Um, he has risen and also.

: 1287

00:54:52,821 --> 00:54:53,601

Committed fraud.

: 1288

00:54:54,111 --> 00:55:02,841

Um, but yeah, so then we cut to a lane

at Irving's grave, which turns out to

: 1289

00:55:02,841 --> 00:55:04,581

be a spot where she's hiding a ton of

: 1290

00:55:04,836 --> 00:55:10,236

glo: So, second time that we

have seen something stashed at a

: 1291

00:55:10,236 --> 00:55:15,876

gravestone, uh, in this podcast,

because, do you guys remember, do you

: 1292

00:55:15,876 --> 00:55:18,936

remember, um, on Airwolf where they,

: 1293

00:55:19,356 --> 00:55:20,256

mabel: do

: 1294

00:55:20,496 --> 00:55:21,726

glo: the drugs or whatever.

: 1295

00:55:22,671 --> 00:55:26,841

Yeah, on that island where it

was like, definitely in Canada,

: 1296

00:55:26,841 --> 00:55:29,871

but definitely they were trying

to make it look like California.

: 1297

00:55:31,581 --> 00:55:32,301

elaines money: Yup.

: 1298

00:55:32,541 --> 00:55:32,891

mabel: Uhhuh.

: 1299

00:55:33,021 --> 00:55:33,891

elaines money: Oh yeah, I do.

: 1300

00:55:34,731 --> 00:55:39,771

I wanna point out that that show

aired in like 85 and they handled

: 1301

00:55:39,831 --> 00:55:46,251

their Native American storyline

significantly better than Uncle Ray was

: 1302

00:55:46,431 --> 00:55:50,391

ever like, with way more respect than

Uncle Ray was ever given in the show.

: 1303

00:55:50,736 --> 00:55:51,876

mabel: that we've seen for sure.

: 1304

00:55:51,876 --> 00:55:53,046

I'll, I'll give them some credit.

: 1305

00:55:53,046 --> 00:55:57,066

Maybe there's somewhere in here that gets

better that we don't know about, but yeah,

: 1306

00:55:57,416 --> 00:55:57,766

elaines money: maybe.

: 1307

00:55:58,736 --> 00:55:59,086

Maybe.

: 1308

00:55:59,676 --> 00:56:01,626

mabel: it seems, seems unlikely.

: 1309

00:56:02,781 --> 00:56:03,591

elaines money: Yeah.

: 1310

00:56:04,281 --> 00:56:08,091

But yeah, so, um, it's a hiding

spot for like a shit ton of money.

: 1311

00:56:08,721 --> 00:56:16,641

And uh, cool shirt guy then rolls up

and um, his name is Larry and he's not

: 1312

00:56:16,641 --> 00:56:19,221

her husband and he's not her protector.

: 1313

00:56:19,521 --> 00:56:22,191

He is in fact Rickett's accountant.

: 1314

00:56:22,551 --> 00:56:25,581

And he was aware that Elaine

was skimming off the top.

: 1315

00:56:26,411 --> 00:56:26,701

mabel: yeah,

: 1316

00:56:26,871 --> 00:56:27,801

glo: he wants his cut.

: 1317

00:56:28,941 --> 00:56:31,101

elaines money: Yeah, daddy wants his cut.

: 1318

00:56:31,971 --> 00:56:38,391

Um, and instead of giving daddy his

cut, Elaine just throws the best

: 1319

00:56:38,391 --> 00:56:40,551

right hook and knocks this man out.

: 1320

00:56:40,746 --> 00:56:41,406

mabel: yeah.

: 1321

00:56:42,321 --> 00:56:43,581

elaines money: We love Elaine.

: 1322

00:56:44,271 --> 00:56:44,571

Yes, I.

: 1323

00:56:46,026 --> 00:56:50,046

Um, and then she's all

like, ha ha ha, and thinks.

: 1324

00:56:50,106 --> 00:56:50,946

mabel: Dolly, where

: 1325

00:56:51,186 --> 00:56:51,396

elaines money: I know.

: 1326

00:56:51,726 --> 00:56:51,906

mabel: the cage,

: 1327

00:56:53,916 --> 00:56:54,276

like

: 1328

00:56:54,411 --> 00:56:54,911

elaines money: so good.

: 1329

00:56:54,966 --> 00:56:55,641

mabel: picture a

: 1330

00:56:55,716 --> 00:56:57,066

elaines money: tall as her,

: 1331

00:56:57,276 --> 00:57:02,226

mabel: Ray Romano's mom with a giant

dolly that has just one box of cash

: 1332

00:57:02,226 --> 00:57:08,646

at the bottom, scuttling as fast as

she can in her little, little sixties,

: 1333

00:57:08,646 --> 00:57:11,316

lady flats, you know, nice flats.

: 1334

00:57:11,376 --> 00:57:17,196

Back to the the car, the truck that

she stole, and then boom, Walker,

: 1335

00:57:17,196 --> 00:57:18,996

Texas Rangers sitting there waiting.

: 1336

00:57:19,176 --> 00:57:19,626

Damnit.

: 1337

00:57:19,686 --> 00:57:19,926

elaines money: Yeah.

: 1338

00:57:21,816 --> 00:57:27,546

Um, and he's all like, why did

you tell us your husband was dead?

: 1339

00:57:27,786 --> 00:57:31,926

And she, uh, and it turns out that

they were going to leave for Florida.

: 1340

00:57:32,316 --> 00:57:37,116

Uh, but four years ago, her

and Irving and, um, Irving

: 1341

00:57:38,346 --> 00:57:39,906

left her for another woman.

: 1342

00:57:39,956 --> 00:57:40,376

glo: Mm-hmm.

: 1343

00:57:40,926 --> 00:57:45,126

elaines money: At this point I will be

putting in a drop from, he had it come in.

: 1344

00:57:45,126 --> 00:57:47,226

'cause I believe one of

those husband's names was

: 1345

00:57:47,391 --> 00:57:48,501

glo: You are correct.

: 1346

00:57:49,326 --> 00:57:49,806

elaines money: yes.

: 1347

00:57:51,246 --> 00:57:58,296

Um, and uh, yeah, so, and she told

everyone he was dead because it's

: 1348

00:57:58,296 --> 00:58:04,476

less embarrassing for her, um,

that way, which is, you know, fair.

: 1349

00:58:04,506 --> 00:58:08,256

'cause he is in a way dead

'cause he's dead to her.

: 1350

00:58:08,781 --> 00:58:09,201

mabel: Yep.

: 1351

00:58:10,116 --> 00:58:15,246

elaines money: Uh, but yeah, so Walker

grabs her and takes her to court 'cause

: 1352

00:58:15,696 --> 00:58:19,476

this has all been happening in like

the space of a couple of hours I guess.

: 1353

00:58:19,476 --> 00:58:23,196

'cause they're all still waiting for

them in the courtroom, which is my

: 1354

00:58:23,301 --> 00:58:23,601

mabel: tick.

: 1355

00:58:23,901 --> 00:58:25,401

It's almost five.

: 1356

00:58:25,401 --> 00:58:30,201

We need to go home and see our families

and children and we're still waiting

: 1357

00:58:30,201 --> 00:58:32,301

on this walker, Texas dip shit.

: 1358

00:58:32,301 --> 00:58:32,841

Like

: 1359

00:58:34,056 --> 00:58:36,816

elaines money: Walker Texas Dip

Shit is the name of the episode.

: 1360

00:58:37,146 --> 00:58:37,656

That's it.

: 1361

00:58:37,776 --> 00:58:39,276

That's calling it right now.

: 1362

00:58:39,741 --> 00:58:42,021

glo: Laura, you're on

fire tonight, by the way.

: 1363

00:58:42,396 --> 00:58:43,626

elaines money: You really are.

: 1364

00:58:43,746 --> 00:58:44,616

You are on.

: 1365

00:58:45,111 --> 00:58:47,601

mabel: I need a ice cream

rose combo every time.

: 1366

00:58:47,601 --> 00:58:47,991

I think.

: 1367

00:58:47,991 --> 00:58:48,501

Yeah.

: 1368

00:58:48,906 --> 00:58:49,356

elaines money: Yes.

: 1369

00:58:49,356 --> 00:58:51,966

Everyone needs ice

cream rose at all times.

: 1370

00:58:51,966 --> 00:58:52,491

That's great.

: 1371

00:58:53,556 --> 00:58:55,746

Um, but yeah.

: 1372

00:58:55,746 --> 00:58:59,376

And so the judge was like, you have,

you have till five to produce this

: 1373

00:58:59,376 --> 00:59:01,176

witness to the, to the prosecutor.

: 1374

00:59:01,986 --> 00:59:11,616

And um, so Walker grabs a lane and takes

her to San an Antonio via helicopter.

: 1375

00:59:13,026 --> 00:59:17,796

They land, they get to the courtroom right

as the judge is about to pound his gavel.

: 1376

00:59:17,826 --> 00:59:21,396

'cause if, if this show is

nothing, it is dramatic.

: 1377

00:59:22,086 --> 00:59:22,596

Um.

: 1378

00:59:24,636 --> 00:59:32,916

And then, uh, rickets sees her and

books it out the door and Chuck Norris

: 1379

00:59:35,436 --> 00:59:37,206

jumps on top a limo,

: 1380

00:59:37,701 --> 00:59:37,921

mabel: uh.

: 1381

00:59:38,646 --> 00:59:38,976

glo: Yep.

: 1382

00:59:39,816 --> 00:59:41,556

elaines money: which

causes it to crash somehow.

: 1383

00:59:42,096 --> 00:59:47,676

And, uh, then he, you know,

catches ricket after a foot

: 1384

00:59:47,676 --> 00:59:49,806

chase and some karate because of

: 1385

00:59:49,956 --> 00:59:50,496

glo: After.

: 1386

00:59:50,556 --> 00:59:51,876

mabel: Fist fight in a market.

: 1387

00:59:52,126 --> 00:59:56,616

glo: After small businesses are just

demolished and there is a pinata fight.

: 1388

00:59:57,726 --> 00:59:58,691

elaines money: there's a pinata fight.

: 1389

00:59:59,471 --> 01:00:07,506

Um, and then a slow mo roundhouse

kick to the chest into a fountain.

: 1390

01:00:09,246 --> 01:00:13,986

Um, and we end in CD's bar

where Walker can't even lose it.

: 1391

01:00:13,986 --> 01:00:14,526

Pool.

: 1392

01:00:15,396 --> 01:00:19,686

And, uh, then we see Elaine.

: 1393

01:00:20,631 --> 01:00:28,581

Has sold the rights to her story

so that it can be made into a movie

: 1394

01:00:29,091 --> 01:00:33,681

called The Big Bingo Bamboozle.

: 1395

01:00:34,431 --> 01:00:35,421

mabel: Yeah.

: 1396

01:00:35,511 --> 01:00:38,091

So there, there's the

title of the episode.

: 1397

01:00:38,091 --> 01:00:39,951

We're gonna hit it in the last moment.

: 1398

01:00:40,191 --> 01:00:40,881

Brilliant.

: 1399

01:00:41,871 --> 01:00:45,741

elaines money: I'm gonna drop in

cinema sins, rural credits right here.

: 1400

01:00:46,431 --> 01:00:52,191

Um, and then Elaine is being interviewed

on this talk show and, uh, says

: 1401

01:00:52,191 --> 01:00:54,981

that both CD and Walker want her

: 1402

01:00:55,116 --> 01:00:55,626

glo: Yep.

: 1403

01:00:55,626 --> 01:00:57,636

Mm-hmm.

: 1404

01:00:58,266 --> 01:00:58,626

Yep.

: 1405

01:00:59,601 --> 01:01:03,801

elaines money: Um, and she's

saving those details for her book.

: 1406

01:01:04,131 --> 01:01:06,291

And I'm kind of mad

this book doesn't exist.

: 1407

01:01:07,851 --> 01:01:09,141

mabel: Yeah, I do.

: 1408

01:01:09,426 --> 01:01:10,656

glo: book club for sure.

: 1409

01:01:11,541 --> 01:01:11,841

elaines money: Oh my

: 1410

01:01:11,841 --> 01:01:13,311

mabel: I love how they're doing.

: 1411

01:01:13,311 --> 01:01:18,141

Like she says something on TV and then

Walker and CD Go movie, and then she

: 1412

01:01:18,141 --> 01:01:20,391

says something else and then Go book.

: 1413

01:01:20,631 --> 01:01:23,271

I was like, yeah, this is good.

: 1414

01:01:23,271 --> 01:01:24,711

This is, this is the writing.

: 1415

01:01:24,711 --> 01:01:25,581

I came here for.

: 1416

01:01:25,656 --> 01:01:25,926

glo: Yep.

: 1417

01:01:26,061 --> 01:01:26,631

elaines money: I know.

: 1418

01:01:27,981 --> 01:01:32,481

And she says, yeah, I have

two rangers, uh, all about me.

: 1419

01:01:32,481 --> 01:01:33,706

And they're both like, what?

: 1420

01:01:34,911 --> 01:01:35,661

Like cd.

: 1421

01:01:35,661 --> 01:01:37,791

We saw you fanning yourself with your hat.

: 1422

01:01:37,881 --> 01:01:39,021

Don't even

: 1423

01:01:39,306 --> 01:01:39,696

mabel: yeah.

: 1424

01:01:39,726 --> 01:01:39,966

Yeah.

: 1425

01:01:39,966 --> 01:01:43,746

She's taken a little creative license

with the whole Walker thing, but,

: 1426

01:01:43,776 --> 01:01:46,176

uh, CD was hook, line and sinker.

: 1427

01:01:46,176 --> 01:01:47,376

He was sold, buddy.

: 1428

01:01:47,931 --> 01:01:48,381

elaines money: Yeah.

: 1429

01:01:48,741 --> 01:01:51,561

Seedy be so fucking for

real right now, dude.

: 1430

01:01:51,771 --> 01:01:56,181

Like you wanted her, we saw

: 1431

01:01:56,376 --> 01:01:57,006

mabel: we did.

: 1432

01:01:59,736 --> 01:02:00,486

Okay.

: 1433

01:02:00,486 --> 01:02:00,751

We did it.

: 1434

01:02:01,026 --> 01:02:01,926

glo: we did it.

: 1435

01:02:04,116 --> 01:02:05,736

You guys wanna play a little game with me

: 1436

01:02:06,741 --> 01:02:07,251

elaines money: Sure.

: 1437

01:02:07,416 --> 01:02:07,656

glo: called?

: 1438

01:02:07,656 --> 01:02:08,496

Good, better, best.

: 1439

01:02:09,261 --> 01:02:09,471

elaines money: Yeah.

: 1440

01:02:09,471 --> 01:02:10,431

I think we could play that.

: 1441

01:02:10,656 --> 01:02:12,036

glo: Laura gets to start this time.

: 1442

01:02:12,816 --> 01:02:13,716

mabel: Oh, no.

: 1443

01:02:13,806 --> 01:02:14,076

glo: do.

: 1444

01:02:14,346 --> 01:02:14,526

It'll

: 1445

01:02:14,916 --> 01:02:15,906

mabel: Didn't I start last time?

: 1446

01:02:16,056 --> 01:02:16,176

glo: you?

: 1447

01:02:16,206 --> 01:02:16,536

Did you?

: 1448

01:02:16,761 --> 01:02:17,991

elaines money: She, she did?

: 1449

01:02:18,051 --> 01:02:18,441

Yeah.

: 1450

01:02:18,516 --> 01:02:18,996

glo: this time.

: 1451

01:02:20,451 --> 01:02:20,781

elaines money: Okay.

: 1452

01:02:21,351 --> 01:02:28,131

Wouldn't it be good if they finally

realized that their racist tap

: 1453

01:02:28,131 --> 01:02:34,671

Cherokee storyline was bullshit and

they kind of just stopped doing it?

: 1454

01:02:36,951 --> 01:02:37,431

That's it.

: 1455

01:02:37,431 --> 01:02:38,301

That's, that's that.

: 1456

01:02:38,301 --> 01:02:38,961

Wouldn't that be good?

: 1457

01:02:40,431 --> 01:02:45,111

glo: Okay, so I, it'll be a little

pause 'cause I have to write it down.

: 1458

01:02:46,221 --> 01:02:46,761

elaines money: Oh, shit.

: 1459

01:02:47,241 --> 01:02:48,366

mabel: Who's the better on this

: 1460

01:02:48,381 --> 01:02:49,371

glo: That would be me.

: 1461

01:02:49,701 --> 01:02:53,871

So wouldn't it be good

or wouldn't it be better?

: 1462

01:02:53,901 --> 01:02:58,521

So it was very good that there

was a racist storyline that was

: 1463

01:02:58,521 --> 01:03:00,921

stopped because it was racist.

: 1464

01:03:00,921 --> 01:03:05,991

But wouldn't it be better if we

looked into it and we actually saw

: 1465

01:03:05,991 --> 01:03:13,551

that there were indeed protests of

the show by First Nations protestors.

: 1466

01:03:15,726 --> 01:03:16,146

elaines money: Mm-hmm.

: 1467

01:03:16,236 --> 01:03:17,016

mabel: that would be better.

: 1468

01:03:17,736 --> 01:03:23,406

But wouldn't it be best if we actually

had like a reckoning where Walker,

: 1469

01:03:23,406 --> 01:03:31,116

Texas Ranger has to go to a nation

and meets like his own counterpart

: 1470

01:03:31,116 --> 01:03:35,976

at their law enforcement and realizes

that person is way cooler than him?

: 1471

01:03:37,616 --> 01:03:37,836

elaines money: Yes,

: 1472

01:03:37,911 --> 01:03:39,231

glo: I love that.

: 1473

01:03:39,886 --> 01:03:40,726

elaines money: I would love that.

: 1474

01:03:40,851 --> 01:03:41,091

mabel: Yeah.

: 1475

01:03:41,276 --> 01:03:41,566

elaines money: Okay.

: 1476

01:03:44,301 --> 01:03:45,561

glo: Okay, cool.

: 1477

01:03:46,101 --> 01:03:51,591

Um, so next will be Laura Beth Glow.

: 1478

01:03:53,011 --> 01:03:53,301

mabel: Okay.

: 1479

01:03:55,446 --> 01:04:02,016

Wouldn't it be good if at some point

on this show we get Walker, Texas

: 1480

01:04:02,016 --> 01:04:06,546

Ranger has to go to New York City?

: 1481

01:04:09,726 --> 01:04:11,196

you got the reference on

: 1482

01:04:11,306 --> 01:04:11,526

glo: No.

: 1483

01:04:11,586 --> 01:04:14,526

mabel: Can you drop it in

there too, like afterwards?

: 1484

01:04:14,556 --> 01:04:14,916

Okay.

: 1485

01:04:19,746 --> 01:04:22,266

glo: Okay, so we're

going to New York City.

: 1486

01:04:22,476 --> 01:04:22,956

All right.

: 1487

01:04:23,151 --> 01:04:23,811

elaines money: Okay.

: 1488

01:04:24,531 --> 01:04:26,511

Uh, that's good.

: 1489

01:04:26,781 --> 01:04:32,301

But wouldn't it be better if

Walker somehow got roped into

: 1490

01:04:32,811 --> 01:04:39,201

being the naked roped, uh, being

the naked cowboy in Times Square?

: 1491

01:04:40,315 --> 01:04:40,795

glo: Okay.

: 1492

01:04:41,835 --> 01:04:42,125

mabel: Yeah.

: 1493

01:04:43,045 --> 01:04:50,245

glo: So it would be good if there was

a NYC episode and much better if Walker

: 1494

01:04:50,245 --> 01:04:52,945

was roped into being the naked cowboy.

: 1495

01:04:53,785 --> 01:05:02,245

But wouldn't it be best if Trave

was actually the one who was roped

: 1496

01:05:02,245 --> 01:05:04,015

into being the naked cowboy and

: 1497

01:05:04,295 --> 01:05:04,875

mabel: Um, yes.

: 1498

01:05:04,975 --> 01:05:06,175

glo: rules at it?

: 1499

01:05:07,600 --> 01:05:09,310

mabel: Yeah, no, that would be the best.

: 1500

01:05:09,310 --> 01:05:09,940

You're right.

: 1501

01:05:10,525 --> 01:05:11,635

elaines money: That'd be great.

: 1502

01:05:11,755 --> 01:05:12,654

I'd love that.

: 1503

01:05:13,540 --> 01:05:16,210

mabel: Also Travet is very

at home in New York City.

: 1504

01:05:16,450 --> 01:05:16,900

Like

: 1505

01:05:16,945 --> 01:05:17,395

elaines money: Yeah.

: 1506

01:05:17,590 --> 01:05:19,000

mabel: he's so cool about it.

: 1507

01:05:19,495 --> 01:05:20,275

glo: totally.

: 1508

01:05:20,740 --> 01:05:24,820

mabel: Like Walker, Texas Ranger is

doing his fish out of water business.

: 1509

01:05:24,820 --> 01:05:27,070

But trave is just like so cool.

: 1510

01:05:27,310 --> 01:05:27,730

glo: Mm-hmm.

: 1511

01:05:28,850 --> 01:05:32,815

elaines money: T's going to the

catsuit place, like he knows what's up.

: 1512

01:05:33,775 --> 01:05:35,695

glo: Alright guys, so here's mine.

: 1513

01:05:36,115 --> 01:05:43,555

Wouldn't it be good if we had an episode

where Walker became an actual cowboy?

: 1514

01:05:43,825 --> 01:05:46,615

So we see him actually wrangling cattle.

: 1515

01:05:51,505 --> 01:05:52,855

Uh, this would be Laura next.

: 1516

01:05:52,860 --> 01:05:53,230

Mm-hmm.

: 1517

01:05:54,550 --> 01:05:54,940

mabel: Oh, is it?

: 1518

01:05:54,970 --> 01:05:55,000

Okay.

: 1519

01:05:57,805 --> 01:06:02,455

That would be good if we have

to see Walker, Texas Ranger

: 1520

01:06:02,455 --> 01:06:07,525

do actual cattle skills and

wrangling and roping the cattles.

: 1521

01:06:07,795 --> 01:06:12,895

I think it would be better though, if he

like falls off his horse at some point.

: 1522

01:06:14,610 --> 01:06:14,830

glo: Yes.

: 1523

01:06:16,825 --> 01:06:19,225

elaines money: Okay, that's better.

: 1524

01:06:19,225 --> 01:06:24,445

But wouldn't it be best if he

falls off his horse in the middle

: 1525

01:06:24,445 --> 01:06:27,415

of the night a wolf sees him?

: 1526

01:06:27,865 --> 01:06:29,904

He tries to, he tries to

make friends with the wolf.

: 1527

01:06:29,904 --> 01:06:31,375

'cause they're both lone wolves, right?

: 1528

01:06:32,695 --> 01:06:33,925

The wolf bites him.

: 1529

01:06:35,980 --> 01:06:38,529

We get werewolf.

: 1530

01:06:38,770 --> 01:06:39,880

Texas Ranger.

: 1531

01:06:40,225 --> 01:06:40,915

glo: Yes.

: 1532

01:06:40,915 --> 01:06:41,485

I love it.

: 1533

01:06:41,485 --> 01:06:42,775

I love it so much.

: 1534

01:06:43,495 --> 01:06:43,915

mabel: Yeah.

: 1535

01:06:44,000 --> 01:06:47,365

I think we can option this into

some kind of series actually.

: 1536

01:06:47,440 --> 01:06:47,830

elaines money: can.

: 1537

01:06:47,980 --> 01:06:48,490

Yeah.

: 1538

01:06:48,580 --> 01:06:52,300

Also played by Jared Padalecki,

who plays Walker in the reboot.

: 1539

01:06:52,300 --> 01:07:00,010

glo: So, so guys, we just need to wait for

the patent to come off of, or whatever.

: 1540

01:07:00,070 --> 01:07:01,630

Come off of Walker, Texas.

: 1541

01:07:01,630 --> 01:07:02,980

Ranger in like a hundred years.

: 1542

01:07:03,160 --> 01:07:04,720

We have to live this long guys.

: 1543

01:07:05,200 --> 01:07:08,170

And then we need to make

werewolf Texas Ranger.

: 1544

01:07:09,415 --> 01:07:10,105

mabel: Yeah, yeah.

: 1545

01:07:10,165 --> 01:07:11,635

Or pass this down to our children.

: 1546

01:07:11,640 --> 01:07:16,390

This is our children's legacy where they

reboot Walker, Texas Ranger as a werewolf.

: 1547

01:07:16,720 --> 01:07:18,430

glo: This is your burden now, children.

: 1548

01:07:19,420 --> 01:07:19,690

elaines money: Yes.

: 1549

01:07:19,695 --> 01:07:21,904

Henry, come talk to mother.

: 1550

01:07:25,720 --> 01:07:29,710

so I can't remember which of

y'all did the swirly last time.

: 1551

01:07:29,740 --> 01:07:30,380

mabel: think it was me.

: 1552

01:07:30,550 --> 01:07:30,970

glo: was

: 1553

01:07:31,475 --> 01:07:33,130

elaines money: Okay, so Glow.

: 1554

01:07:33,490 --> 01:07:34,120

glo: ri time.

: 1555

01:07:35,050 --> 01:07:36,100

elaines money: swirly time.

: 1556

01:07:36,190 --> 01:07:38,710

Tell me when you want

me to stop your swirly.

: 1557

01:07:39,520 --> 01:07:41,860

glo: Swirl, swirl, swirl, swirl, swirl.

: 1558

01:07:41,860 --> 01:07:42,400

Stop.

: 1559

01:07:44,680 --> 01:07:48,730

elaines money: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6.

: 1560

01:07:50,320 --> 01:07:56,205

Okay, So we're gonna do 12, is that right?

: 1561

01:07:56,535 --> 01:07:57,045

Yeah, that's right.

: 1562

01:07:57,045 --> 01:07:58,095

12 episodes.

: 1563

01:07:58,995 --> 01:07:59,925

Skipping 12 episodes.

: 1564

01:08:01,035 --> 01:08:01,545

glo: All right.

: 1565

01:08:01,545 --> 01:08:02,445

Who has it pulled up?

: 1566

01:08:03,765 --> 01:08:04,425

mabel: Oh shit.

: 1567

01:08:04,725 --> 01:08:06,675

elaines money: I think I do actually.

: 1568

01:08:06,705 --> 01:08:07,065

mabel: Okay.

: 1569

01:08:08,309 --> 01:08:09,749

elaines money: I don't know

what this whole music is.

: 1570

01:08:09,749 --> 01:08:10,769

I'm very sorry.

: 1571

01:08:11,609 --> 01:08:12,329

Uh,

: 1572

01:08:12,359 --> 01:08:15,779

mabel: As long as it's not the Walker,

Texas Ranger theme, I do not give a shit.

: 1573

01:08:16,049 --> 01:08:17,459

Give me all your hold music.

: 1574

01:08:18,029 --> 01:08:22,439

elaines money: you know, I remember

tunes for the most part, but I

: 1575

01:08:22,439 --> 01:08:25,679

think I blocked that one out like

immediately after hearing it.

: 1576

01:08:27,269 --> 01:08:32,429

Okay, so 12, 13.

: 1577

01:08:32,969 --> 01:08:45,149

Okay, so 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12.

: 1578

01:08:45,238 --> 01:08:54,509

Okay, so if I did this correctly, um, we

will be watching season four, episode two.

: 1579

01:08:55,474 --> 01:08:56,524

Deep kava.

: 1580

01:08:57,874 --> 01:08:58,524

glo: Deep come.

: 1581

01:09:00,538 --> 01:09:00,809

mabel: yeah.

: 1582

01:09:00,809 --> 01:09:02,459

You didn't say that, did you?

: 1583

01:09:03,354 --> 01:09:05,309

elaines money: I said deep cover.

: 1584

01:09:06,299 --> 01:09:08,234

This is not another drive by Cooning.

: 1585

01:09:09,453 --> 01:09:09,743

glo: This.

: 1586

01:09:10,679 --> 01:09:11,639

mabel: I was like, whoa.

: 1587

01:09:11,639 --> 01:09:14,969

We went to Texas Ranger Knights

really quick, didn't we?

: 1588

01:09:15,734 --> 01:09:17,474

elaines money: I think

I am on the wrong page.

: 1589

01:09:17,474 --> 01:09:19,394

I think I'm on Winker, Texas Ranger.

: 1590

01:09:19,754 --> 01:09:20,174

Um,

: 1591

01:09:22,738 --> 01:09:23,339

mabel: God damnit.

: 1592

01:09:23,339 --> 01:09:23,849

That's good.

: 1593

01:09:23,908 --> 01:09:24,719

glo: is good too.

: 1594

01:09:26,189 --> 01:09:27,443

mabel: That's really good, Beth.

: 1595

01:09:29,769 --> 01:09:30,279

elaines money: Thank you.

: 1596

01:09:30,434 --> 01:09:30,654

glo: Wow.

: 1597

01:09:32,474 --> 01:09:35,413

elaines money: Uh, do you guys

wanna hear a synapsis of deep cover?

: 1598

01:09:35,524 --> 01:09:35,964

glo: Absolutely.

: 1599

01:09:35,984 --> 01:09:36,203

We

: 1600

01:09:36,224 --> 01:09:36,794

mabel: sure do.

: 1601

01:09:36,943 --> 01:09:37,234

Yeah.

: 1602

01:09:37,424 --> 01:09:37,714

Yeah.

: 1603

01:09:38,413 --> 01:09:38,624

elaines money: Okay.

: 1604

01:09:38,984 --> 01:09:44,294

An undercover detective in

Miami is captured by drug

: 1605

01:09:44,294 --> 01:09:46,814

dealers when her cover is blown.

: 1606

01:09:46,904 --> 01:09:51,434

Miami Police ask Texas Rangers

to help by going undercover as

: 1607

01:09:51,434 --> 01:09:53,234

out of town dealers looking for

: 1608

01:09:53,374 --> 01:09:53,794

glo: stupid.

: 1609

01:09:55,739 --> 01:09:57,239

mabel: That is a terrible idea.

: 1610

01:09:57,239 --> 01:09:58,469

That is a terrible idea.

: 1611

01:09:58,469 --> 01:10:00,689

But we're getting my Fish

out of water episode.

: 1612

01:10:00,689 --> 01:10:01,139

They're going to

: 1613

01:10:01,274 --> 01:10:01,334

elaines money: We're.

: 1614

01:10:01,674 --> 01:10:03,854

glo: are woo.

: 1615

01:10:03,884 --> 01:10:05,624

elaines money: is super exciting.

: 1616

01:10:06,134 --> 01:10:06,704

Um,

: 1617

01:10:06,719 --> 01:10:09,659

mabel: This could be as

good as New York City like.

: 1618

01:10:10,244 --> 01:10:10,634

elaines money: Yeah.

: 1619

01:10:10,693 --> 01:10:13,244

I'm pretty excited to see Chuck Norris.

: 1620

01:10:13,244 --> 01:10:15,494

Pretend to be a drug dealer.

: 1621

01:10:16,034 --> 01:10:22,604

mabel: I need there to be some like

sassy Cuban lady who takes us down a peg.

: 1622

01:10:22,604 --> 01:10:23,443

I would love that.

: 1623

01:10:24,154 --> 01:10:25,774

elaines money: Um, yes.

: 1624

01:10:25,834 --> 01:10:27,534

I'm very excited for this episode.

: 1625

01:10:27,584 --> 01:10:30,014

Hopefully it's not

complete trash, but it will

: 1626

01:10:30,139 --> 01:10:30,989

mabel: Fingers crossed

: 1627

01:10:31,318 --> 01:10:32,129

glo: all right guys.

: 1628

01:10:33,099 --> 01:10:33,389

elaines money: Okay.

: 1629

01:10:33,739 --> 01:10:34,349

Goodnight.

: 1630

01:10:34,349 --> 01:10:34,889

glo: friends.

: 1631

01:10:35,009 --> 01:10:35,079

mabel: you next.

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