Shownotes
Hey Heart Buddies! We hear from Holly Morrell who shares the profound impact of hypertrophic cardiomyopathy on her family and herself including her personal experience with a faulty defibrillator implant, multiple surgeries, and a life-threatening rupture that necessitated open-heart surgery. Despite these challenges, Holly finds strength and purpose, continually striving to prevent sudden cardiac arrest in communities through her nonprofit, Heartfelt.
You can get in touch with her at holly@heartfeltscreening.org
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Transcripts
I came out the other side and it's unbelievable. I was so
Speaker:wrong. I was so wrong because I did
Speaker:resume not only a beautiful quality of life, but one
Speaker:that I will forever be grateful for. I mean,
Speaker:it makes me want to cry just thinking about it, but it
Speaker:was amazing. And I do have
Speaker:a greater appreciation, like you sort of mentioned,
Speaker:for the simple things in life, right? The things that I thought I
Speaker:was never going to get to do again. So
Speaker:I do have a renewed appreciation for those
Speaker:things. And then also being able to get back to my work and
Speaker:continue my community service and my cardiac screenings.
Speaker:I mean, wow, I just. I'm so blessed.
Speaker:Welcome to open heart Surgery with Bootst, the
Speaker:podcast that gets to the heart of what it's really
Speaker:like to go under the knife. I am your host,
Speaker:Boots Knighton, here to share the ups,
Speaker:downs and everything in between about
Speaker:heart surgery from the patient's perspective.
Speaker:Before we dive into this operating room of our
Speaker:shared experiences, please make sure this
Speaker:podcast stays on the healthy side of the
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Speaker:www.patreon.com
Speaker:openheart surgery with boots. There you'll get
Speaker:exclusive content, behind the scenes stories, and
Speaker:a chance to connect with other heart warriors.
Speaker:But for now, let's open up and explore the world
Speaker:of heart surgery from the other side of the
Speaker:scalpel.
Speaker:Holly, I am so glad we have
Speaker:connected over our hearts. And the amazing
Speaker:thing about this podcast is I have
Speaker:had the opportunity of meeting so many incredible
Speaker:souls who have taken their heart journey
Speaker:and turn it into something positive, which
Speaker:listeners today will get to hear from you. But let's
Speaker:first set the scene of how
Speaker:you became a heart patient. Okay,
Speaker:well, I would like to start off by saying thank you so
Speaker:much for including me. It's an honor
Speaker:to be included and I loved having the opportunity to
Speaker:meet with you and have some pre recorded
Speaker:discussions. I love your energy and I thank you for your advocacy,
Speaker:for sure. You're welcome. Thank you.
Speaker:So, boots, my story began quite
Speaker:a long time ago. My family has a genetic heart
Speaker:disease called hypertrophic cardiomyopathy,
Speaker:and our family was affected pretty
Speaker:extremely. Quite a few family members, I
Speaker:believe. Out of eleven possible family members, nine of
Speaker:us had the disease. Sadly, and tragically, six
Speaker:have died. However, three of us live thanks to
Speaker:interventional methods, including myself. This was
Speaker:happening a very long time ago. I think that's why there were so
Speaker:many deaths, because there hadn't been advancements in technology
Speaker:and medicine in order to save or protect
Speaker:their lives. So I had been dealing with this for most of
Speaker:my life, since I was a small child, actually. But
Speaker:then I started doing some community
Speaker:service work, heart related. And
Speaker:ironically, I wasn't conclusively diagnosed with the
Speaker:disease until a few years after starting my
Speaker:community service. So I did find out that I indeed had
Speaker:hypertrophic cardiomyopathy, and I had to have a
Speaker:defibrillator implanted to protect myself from sudden
Speaker:death. And that journey has
Speaker:been quite challenging, and that
Speaker:ultimately, the device in my body
Speaker:ultimately resulted in me needing emergency
Speaker:open heart surgery. So I'll be happy to share
Speaker:more details about that when you're ready. Yes.
Speaker:Yes. So you started a nonprofit
Speaker:called Heartfelt screening, and you did
Speaker:that in response to your family's
Speaker:journey, but prior to the
Speaker:defibrillator being implanted? Yes. And let me
Speaker:provide a little bit of clarification. So I actually
Speaker:began my nonprofit community service work
Speaker:in 1999. It was with
Speaker:another organization that I helped create,
Speaker:and I was the executive director. However, I wasn't a
Speaker:founder of that organization, and it wasn't called
Speaker:Heartbelt, but I did start my community service work
Speaker:at that time, which happened to be providing
Speaker:community based cardiac screenings in order to save lives from
Speaker:sudden cardiac arrest through early detection. And
Speaker:so that was in 1999, and you were correct. I wasn't
Speaker:conclusively diagnosed myself until
Speaker:2002, a few years after starting my efforts.
Speaker:Wow. So what I'm really
Speaker:struck by already, Holly, is
Speaker:you were moved by your family's
Speaker:journey, and you
Speaker:had the heart pun totally intended to help
Speaker:others. And I can't help but wonder
Speaker:how that has actually likely saved your life.
Speaker:And the reason why I say that is, you
Speaker:know, I'm in. I'm now in the sixties range of number of
Speaker:episodes I've released. And so I've
Speaker:interviewed quite a few heart patients, and I've noticed
Speaker:that the heart patients that
Speaker:have, that are more generous with their time
Speaker:and resources, I guess resources is time is
Speaker:resource, but are more generous and thinking of their
Speaker:fellow man and woman and wanting to leave the
Speaker:world better than they found it, have a better
Speaker:outcome in their health. That's interesting.
Speaker:Very interesting perspective. And I wouldn't deny it
Speaker:for my own personal circumstance or just generally speaking, I
Speaker:could have a. Have a clear understanding of how that would
Speaker:be possible. And yes, I began
Speaker:my efforts motivated by my
Speaker:personal story in terms of my family history
Speaker:and in memory of my loved ones lost.
Speaker:I was motivated by my father, who was still living at the
Speaker:time, who had already received a heart
Speaker:transplant, and he encouraged me to
Speaker:start my advocacy. But
Speaker:really, the initiation of
Speaker:the cardiac screenings were a result of
Speaker:continuing to hear about these young athletes dying
Speaker:on the playing field. I mean, it was. The Internet
Speaker:was in its infancy, so this was more like on the tv
Speaker:news or in the newspapers, but we would continually
Speaker:hear about these young athletes dying on the playing field. And as
Speaker:a family with heart disease, we felt
Speaker:we sort of understood the reason why they were dying, but
Speaker:the media made it sound like it was some crazy
Speaker:thing that, you know, couldn't be prevented or
Speaker:by some act of God or something, you know, that couldn't really
Speaker:be addressed. And we felt differently. So it was a
Speaker:combination of those two things, a personal
Speaker:family history, as well as just being,
Speaker:again, pun intended, heartbroken over continually
Speaker:hearing about these young athletes dying on the playing field and
Speaker:really believing that those deaths and
Speaker:tragedies were probably more often than not a
Speaker:preventable tragedy. And again, I
Speaker:wasn't diagnosed myself in 2002. My journey has
Speaker:been lengthy. It's been sort of simultaneous
Speaker:with my community service, my own personal health journey,
Speaker:because it's been broad over all these
Speaker:years and multiple surgeries and
Speaker:challenges and complications, again, all the while doing
Speaker:the community service work. And I do believe
Speaker:that the risk of sounding overdramatic,
Speaker:that my life was spared so that I could
Speaker:save others. And I believe it not
Speaker:only a blessing to do my work, but an
Speaker:absolute privilege. And so it kind of goes hand
Speaker:in hand with what you expressed. I mean, I gotta keep
Speaker:fighting and staying healthy because I know I can save others.
Speaker:And it does give me a whole nother
Speaker:level of gratitude, right, to be in a
Speaker:position where I can protect others and save lives
Speaker:while fighting for my own. It's an
Speaker:experience and a journey, for sure.
Speaker:Yeah, no, I love that. And where
Speaker:you and I have, and I hope this lands
Speaker:well. My intention is good, but I feel
Speaker:like because of what you and I, granted, our stories are
Speaker:different, but I. I sense that the outcome is the
Speaker:same and that we have a perspective
Speaker:that can't be learned in a book. Amen
Speaker:to that. And when you finally realize
Speaker:that you're not going to get out of here alive, and
Speaker:that you can't take all your wealth
Speaker:and successes with you, and
Speaker:that really all you can do is take
Speaker:the love you felt, the love you gave, that's at least what
Speaker:I learned through my journey, and that's when I
Speaker:really started to live differently. And I just aired
Speaker:an episode yesterday where a childhood friend that I
Speaker:interviewed, I'm going to think about this for the rest of my
Speaker:life, he said. And I ended up putting it in the title of the
Speaker:episode. He said, you know, am I loving? Well,
Speaker:I ask that every day. And he just put it in
Speaker:a way that, like, I had already been living, but there's
Speaker:just such power in words. And
Speaker:I'm going to say that now every day. And I think about
Speaker:you and what you're doing with heartfelt screening, and that's a
Speaker:way of loving. Well, because here you are looking
Speaker:to save lives that lives you've never even
Speaker:meth. You're just, you know, and if
Speaker:everyone could be that way, if we could be thinking
Speaker:beyond ourselves, imagine the world we would be
Speaker:in. So you're making a difference, but let's
Speaker:get back to your story. So you were diagnosed in 2002,
Speaker:so now you have this diagnosis, and
Speaker:things started to shift.
Speaker:Yes. So it was pretty
Speaker:astonishing to receive my
Speaker:diagnosis. And, and because I was already doing
Speaker:the cardiac screenings and the community service, I had a
Speaker:pretty large network of cardiologists on my medical
Speaker:advisory board. And, you know, I was connected with
Speaker:directly in doing these cardiac screenings.
Speaker:I did have quite, quite a bit of handholding, which I
Speaker:was blessed to receive, and some guidance
Speaker:and advice in terms of next steps for me.
Speaker:And it pretty much became clear that,
Speaker:you know, not only because what my family had
Speaker:already endured, but also, you know, a doctor said
Speaker:to me, like, you're never going to be able to ignore this because
Speaker:you live it every day, you know, and I'm preaching
Speaker:early detection and intervention. It's not like I could ignore
Speaker:my own advice for myself and continue to try
Speaker:to educate, raise awareness and provide early
Speaker:detection. So at that time, I made a decision
Speaker:to have a defibrillator implanted in my
Speaker:body and boots. Just unfortunately, it
Speaker:didn't go well for me. The device was implanted
Speaker:incorrectly, causing me a tremendous
Speaker:amount of pain and suffering. And
Speaker:I didn't really receive any help or
Speaker:assistance from the doctor that
Speaker:put the device in my body. So I was
Speaker:left to basically navigate through, I
Speaker:mean, pain, unmerciful pain, pain
Speaker:that. I realize that this sounds quite
Speaker:dramatic and negative, but, I mean, I really do understand why
Speaker:people kill themselves that suffer with chronic pain because
Speaker:it was unbearable and I would never wish that
Speaker:on anyone. I pray to God I never experienced it again,
Speaker:but it was, like I said, unmerciful. And
Speaker:it was because the device was implanted incorrectly and
Speaker:it was wreaking all sorts of havoc within my body.
Speaker:So, basically, to spare you all the gory details, with
Speaker:every breath that I was taking, my device was
Speaker:ripping some major muscle groups in my chest and under
Speaker:my arm and so on and so forth. It was crazy. And
Speaker:it became really bad
Speaker:because no doctors were willing to
Speaker:address it. Be truthful. They were, I think, fearful
Speaker:of what was going on. They kept saying, we haven't seen this
Speaker:before. We don't really know what to do. So their choice at
Speaker:that time was just to basically let me suffer.
Speaker:And it was dreadful. So that was the beginning of
Speaker:my journey. I, thankfully, almost a year
Speaker:later, had a surgery to correct that,
Speaker:and I got my life back again and the use of my arm, I might
Speaker:say. And so I was grateful. You know, it was a. It
Speaker:was a rough start, for sure, but I was grateful to have
Speaker:my life back and the use of my arm. And I got out of pain
Speaker:and I recovered. And then, unfortunately, I was
Speaker:affected by, like, all the manufacturer
Speaker:recalls of the equipment that was implanted in my body.
Speaker:So that led to a few more surgeries. Then I
Speaker:had a. Some need for battery replacement
Speaker:kind of prematurely. But even though
Speaker:those were challenges, the surgeries went
Speaker:well. And so I didn't have any
Speaker:other than the, what, six to eight week
Speaker:typical recovery time. I didn't have anything more
Speaker:dramatic than that, so I was thankful. But then
Speaker:right around 2012, I found
Speaker:out that my leads, the wires,
Speaker:had been recalled by the manufacturer, and I
Speaker:knew that was potentially going to be
Speaker:dangerous. The recommendations at the time,
Speaker:depending on the use of your
Speaker:pacemaker inside the defibrillator, that was sort
Speaker:of set the recommendations of how quickly you
Speaker:needed the leads or the wires replaced. So mine
Speaker:were supposed to sit tight for a little while, but unfortunately, they
Speaker:fractured. And so that
Speaker:expedited the need for me to have surgery to
Speaker:not only replace them, but to have a few
Speaker:existing ones removed, which, again, I realized
Speaker:was going to be potentially dangerous. And I can
Speaker:keep going if you want. I have a question about that.
Speaker:So was the recall, because there was a
Speaker:risk of them coming apart, and then they came apart. You
Speaker:know, to be honest, I don't remember the
Speaker:exact reasoning for the recall.
Speaker:I think they were at risk of fracturing
Speaker:or just malfunctioning. Okay. But I don't
Speaker:remember exactly boots, if I. If I'm honest. But in my
Speaker:particular case, you know, I needed them out.
Speaker:And as you can imagine, I mean, as we get older and we have these
Speaker:devices in our body for a lengthy period of time.
Speaker:We run out of room for the wires, so
Speaker:the removal can be quite challenging. And
Speaker:so I once again sought the advice
Speaker:of many of my heartfelt cardiologists of
Speaker:who I might see to have this situation resolved.
Speaker:And I was guided to a very skilled
Speaker:cardiac surgeon in La county.
Speaker:And so I prepared to have that surgery.
Speaker:And that was in July of 2012. And
Speaker:again, unfortunately, it didn't go well for me.
Speaker:Yeah, it went really poorly.
Speaker:Yeah. So, basically,
Speaker:I. When I was in surgery, they
Speaker:had ruptured a vein under my
Speaker:clavicle, and I was bleeding out and
Speaker:dying. And so the surgeon had a very limited
Speaker:amount of time to open me up with open heart
Speaker:surgery to try to repair the vein, which I learned
Speaker:later is never successful or usually never
Speaker:successful, but here I am. So he
Speaker:obviously, with the 90 seconds that he had available
Speaker:to him, repaired the vein and saved my
Speaker:life. I remember
Speaker:waking up in the hospital, in the ICU,
Speaker:and to a sweet little gentle kiss on my forehead
Speaker:from my surgeon, and he sort of whispered in my
Speaker:ear, I'm so glad you're with us. And
Speaker:I remember, even though I was on probably a mega dose of morphine,
Speaker:I remember that, like, not really registering. What is he
Speaker:talking about? And then he told me, in the very
Speaker:technical terms, what had happened in terms of
Speaker:being cut open. And it was just too overwhelming. And I
Speaker:remember just closing my eyes and praying to go back to sleep
Speaker:for a while, which I did. And then I later realized,
Speaker:after I had the conversation with him, that part of the
Speaker:motivation for the sweet little kiss was to make sure that
Speaker:neurologically I was okay and that my senses, my
Speaker:hearing and my sight and all that kind of stuff were in good,
Speaker:good order. I'm just. That's just a
Speaker:lot. I have so many questions.
Speaker:So is that a risk? The vein
Speaker:being torn, ruptured? Like, did they. Did they prepare you
Speaker:for that? Going in, saying this could possibly happen, you
Speaker:know? Yes, and I was really
Speaker:grateful for that. In fact, I remember my
Speaker:initial consultation with the surgeon,
Speaker:besides just loving every bit of the vibe of their office,
Speaker:it had such a family feel to it. I think his wife was
Speaker:running the front desk, their dog was running around the lobby.
Speaker:He was so soft spoken and seemed so genuine,
Speaker:but, I mean, he laid it out on the table. He
Speaker:said, I could remove your heart, your lungs, with no
Speaker:problem, but this procedure that I'm going to do for you is
Speaker:the most stressful in my career.
Speaker:And he told me the risks, and he was super
Speaker:candid. And I remember sharing that conversation with my friends
Speaker:and family and them being bothered by it. Boots. I was
Speaker:absolutely appreciative because I didn't want anything
Speaker:sugar coated. I wanted to know, you know, what was going, what
Speaker:the risks were. I wanted someone to be real with me. And he definitely
Speaker:was. And I'm not sure that he illustrated
Speaker:that specific risk of the vein under the clavicle,
Speaker:but he talked about, you know, because the wires are fish
Speaker:hooked into your heart and running through your veins, there's a risk
Speaker:of shredding the vein or ripping a hole in your heart or something like
Speaker:that. And so I was prepared. But you
Speaker:never think it's gonna happen to you. No. No.
Speaker:So I'm like, you know, even though you
Speaker:already told me the story, it still. It just takes the
Speaker:breath away. Okay, so now you have this reality that
Speaker:you've now had open heart surgery. Did you have
Speaker:a new. Do you have, do you have a. Do you have a new device
Speaker:put in or did they just like, this woman has had enough. No more wires
Speaker:anywhere. I. No.
Speaker:So my open heart surgery was my
Speaker:6th surgery, heart related, all
Speaker:related to my device. And I don't
Speaker:know why, but
Speaker:my recovery from the open heart surgery was
Speaker:once again, unbelievably challenging. Like,
Speaker:I just didn't heal up in a few weeks and
Speaker:call it a day. And when I went into that
Speaker:surgery, my device was obviously on my left
Speaker:side because that's where they placed them. But because of those other
Speaker:six surgeries and this situation, my
Speaker:left side was just too, I don't know, mangled,
Speaker:for lack of a better word, to keep the device there.
Speaker:So they had to put the device on my right side. So basically,
Speaker:I mean, I was cut. I know you can't really see my hand gestures, but
Speaker:I was cut along my left side, my right
Speaker:side and down the middle and then all the tubes and everything else that goes
Speaker:along with open heart surgery. So I pretty much looked and
Speaker:felt kind of like Frankenstein. It was. It was quite a bit.
Speaker:And I think that, like, when it's an
Speaker:emergency situation, I don't think they handle things very
Speaker:gingerly. I think they're busy ripping you apartheid,
Speaker:trying to save your life. And so I think it was like a
Speaker:combination of so many things that
Speaker:just once again put me back in
Speaker:tremendous pain for a very long
Speaker:period of time. And I think the toughest part for
Speaker:me, because I was a very active and sporty person
Speaker:prior to the surgery, even through knowing that I had
Speaker:heart disease and having the device. I
Speaker:really got to a place where I just
Speaker:absolutely couldn't imagine any quality of life ever
Speaker:again. I mean, I was just so deep in it
Speaker:and dark and in so much pain. I
Speaker:just couldn't comprehend that I could come out
Speaker:of it any other way. And I think I shared with
Speaker:you, I got on social media
Speaker:platforms, I found the Zipper club Facebook
Speaker:pages. That's where I think you and I originally got connected. But
Speaker:I'm telling you what, that was my saving grace,
Speaker:because I got to connect with people who
Speaker:had similar journeys. Maybe not exactly the same, but
Speaker:similar. Some less than, some worse than. I mean,
Speaker:you know, just. But a lot of people that could relate and offered
Speaker:me tremendous support and
Speaker:advice and, you know,
Speaker:love. And finding those
Speaker:platforms were my first spark of hope.
Speaker:Because like you said earlier, it's hard to
Speaker:relate, right? Unless you find someone that's walked
Speaker:in your shoes and all our journeys are
Speaker:different. And I just was so appreciative
Speaker:of finding my people that could help support me through
Speaker:mine, and they gave me hope and words of
Speaker:encouragement. And I think I posted
Speaker:frequently about, you know, all my struggles. And
Speaker:I connected with a couple people that encouraged me that it would get
Speaker:better, even though it was taking me a little bit more time. And I'm
Speaker:telling you, I will forever be
Speaker:grateful because it was wonderful. And
Speaker:then I think it took me about eleven
Speaker:months to get off all the drugs. I mean, I wore an
Speaker:opiate patch on my arm, I think, for like eleven months because of
Speaker:the pain, but I got off all the meds and the
Speaker:pain went away. I healed. My body was
Speaker:miraculous and I came out the other side
Speaker:and it's unbelievable. I was so wrong. I was
Speaker:so wrong because I did resume not only a
Speaker:beautiful quality of life, but one that I will forever
Speaker:be grateful for. I mean, makes me want to cry just
Speaker:thinking about it, but it was amazing. And I
Speaker:do have a greater appreciation, like
Speaker:you sort of mentioned, for the simple things in life, right?
Speaker:The things that I thought I was never going to get to do again.
Speaker:So I do have a renewed
Speaker:appreciation for those things. And then also being able to
Speaker:get back to my work and continue my community service
Speaker:and my cardiac screenings. I mean, wow, I just. I'm
Speaker:so blessed. Thank you for being so real with
Speaker:us. And I love my surgeon. I will forever be
Speaker:grateful to him and his team, but
Speaker:they unintentionally set me
Speaker:up to think that I would come out
Speaker:skipping. And I kind of did compare to a
Speaker:lot of people, but I ran into my fair share of complications,
Speaker:too. And it would
Speaker:have only benefited me to mentally
Speaker:prepare for the unexpected. And I don't want to
Speaker:sugarcoat it for heart patients listening to this
Speaker:now, like, you're in for a ride, but if you hang
Speaker:on like Holly has, like I have, you are
Speaker:in for the most spectacular life, but you have to be prepared
Speaker:for. For it to suck for a little bit,
Speaker:right? It just does. I mean,
Speaker:heart surgery is no joke. And, I mean, I
Speaker:was told that part, at least, but, like, I wasn't prepared
Speaker:for, like, the spiritual shifts, the emotional shifts.
Speaker:Right? It's like, jesus, I'm like a whole new person, and I
Speaker:wasn't, like, I didn't know it was going to be, like, reborn
Speaker:and, like, floating on a cloud. Like, I mean, that's how much I've
Speaker:shifted spiritually. I mean, I'm not really. That's a. Maybe a weird
Speaker:choice of words, but, like, I. I don't know about you, but, I mean, I
Speaker:have experienced such a radical shift in my whole soul,
Speaker:and it seems like you have, too. And it's just, like, be open
Speaker:to, like, the miracles that will transpire despite
Speaker:the challenge. That's a beautiful way
Speaker:of putting it. And I'm sure, you know, obviously,
Speaker:I can tell by your reactions that even though we have our own
Speaker:stories, it's hard to hear each other's because we
Speaker:have great empathy and compassion, because we understand
Speaker:the journey. And I'm sorry you had to endure what
Speaker:you had to as well, but it is
Speaker:magnificent, right? That we get to support each
Speaker:other. And that's why, once again, I thank you for your advocacy
Speaker:and doing the podcast and giving us an ability
Speaker:to share our stories with a broader platform, perhaps to reach the
Speaker:person that might not be on our Facebook group.
Speaker:All right, so, yeah, thank you. Yeah. So, in
Speaker:the little bit of time we have left, tell us about heartfelt.
Speaker:Okay, so even though my. My website
Speaker:is heartfeltscreening.org dot, that's not technically the name.
Speaker:It's just. It's just heartfelt or
Speaker:heartfelt cardiac connections is actually the official name. And
Speaker:I think I joked with you. I don't know what I was thinking because it
Speaker:sounds like a dating or something, and so I
Speaker:just. I just like to call it heartfelt. And it's.
Speaker:So I usually after I get to know
Speaker:someone or I'm talking about my work or my journey, or I'm
Speaker:dealing with a parent that's tragically lost their child
Speaker:or dealing with a family where we've saved their loved one's
Speaker:life, I usually say, I hope you understand why I named it heartfelt,
Speaker:because everything about it is absolutely heartfelt.
Speaker:But we're a 501 nonprofit
Speaker:organization dedicated to saving lives from sudden
Speaker:cardiac arrest through early detection, education,
Speaker:and increasing public awareness. So the other reason why
Speaker:I'm appreciative of today, Boots, is because
Speaker:anytime I have a chance to educate or raise awareness
Speaker:is all part of my mission in life and heartfelt's mission. So
Speaker:I appreciate that. I have entered my
Speaker:25th year of doing cardiac screenings in the
Speaker:community. This past Saturday, we returned to
Speaker:a school here in Orange County, California, where we've screened for
Speaker:over a decade and saved multiple lives. But we
Speaker:hit a huge milestone, and we screened our
Speaker:60,000th heart on Saturday, and
Speaker:that's pretty incredible. It's so incredible.
Speaker:So, you know, again, it's not only a blessing, but a
Speaker:privilege to do the work. I think I shared with you that
Speaker:I believe that often the gift of purpose is
Speaker:found through great adversity. So that
Speaker:goes along with what I said. I believe my own life
Speaker:was spared once again through emergency open heart
Speaker:surgery so that I could save others. And it's just
Speaker:been magnificent. I'm going to be super
Speaker:transparent. I wish that it wasn't so challenging, because
Speaker:we do huge work, but we don't have the funding that we're
Speaker:so worthy of and so deserving of, and
Speaker:that makes it super challenging. I mean, imagine we've screened
Speaker:60,000 individuals with no funding,
Speaker:so imagine what we could do with funding.
Speaker:Right? Right. And why is that such a challenge, you think?
Speaker:Well, I. You know, I'll take personal responsibility. I never
Speaker:entered into this sector thinking that I was
Speaker:skilled at fundraising. I didn't even know that I was skilled at
Speaker:screening hearts, but I figured that part out, but not quite
Speaker:the fundraising effort. And, you know, to be real,
Speaker:we know that there are some other much larger national
Speaker:organizations that are highly visible that are receiving
Speaker:funding and, you know, they do some great
Speaker:work. But that means that a lot of times the smaller
Speaker:grassroots organizations that their boots on the
Speaker:ground are missing out on the
Speaker:funding because it's not being directed our way. And I haven't
Speaker:really figured out how to really get that message
Speaker:across because there's plenty out there for all. Yeah,
Speaker:that's what I'll say about that. Okay. What if
Speaker:I wanted to have heartfelt in the
Speaker:tetons where I live? Like, do you?
Speaker:Is there a way for folks to bring
Speaker:heartfelt to their communities, or do you have to
Speaker:travel? Short answer to that is not at this
Speaker:moment, because I've been doing it for 25 years,
Speaker:obviously. Well, not obviously. I'm just going to say that within
Speaker:that timeframe, I certainly have traveled to multiple
Speaker:states, you know, lots of different areas to provide the screening,
Speaker:but we just don't have the financial resources to support that right
Speaker:now. So the longer answer is if there
Speaker:were specific funding available,
Speaker:that could be a possibility. But right now, I'm
Speaker:trying to really stay focused right here in southern
Speaker:California, in Orange county and the bordering
Speaker:counties, La County, San Diego County, Riverside
Speaker:county, because just logistically and
Speaker:financially, it just makes more sense at this particular point in
Speaker:time. Yeah, well, every person you help,
Speaker:it has a ripple effect, whether, you know, it's across the country
Speaker:or in Southern California. So every life,
Speaker:it counts and every life matters. And you are doing such
Speaker:incredible work despite your six
Speaker:surgeries. Well, now I've had seven
Speaker:because I had another one in
Speaker:2019 because my device had
Speaker:come out of its pocket and I had to have it
Speaker:revised. But you're okay now?
Speaker:I am okay now, but my device is once again out
Speaker:of its pocket. And that happened a little over,
Speaker:I think, gosh, already a year ago and
Speaker:same thing. I mean, because I've been down this road before I started having the
Speaker:pain, it was causing havoc with my right shoulder because again, it's on
Speaker:my right side now. It's definitely
Speaker:protruding out my chest wall. I don't know if you
Speaker:call it a chest wall, but you know what I mean visually. I mean, it's
Speaker:so you can see it so clearly. It was never like that.
Speaker:But I did make a commitment to myself
Speaker:that I would try to see if somehow
Speaker:my body would miraculously acclimate to
Speaker:wherever it's landed now. And I'm happy to say
Speaker:that I'm okay for the moment. So I'm
Speaker:leaving it as is, and I'm comfortable and
Speaker:so I am okay. Okay, Holly,
Speaker:thank you. And I wish I could give you a hug.
Speaker:You're making a difference. I will have in the show
Speaker:notes how to find Holly, how to find heartland felt.
Speaker:If you have it, if you have the resources,
Speaker:show Holly some love and her nonprofit. She's obviously
Speaker:doing amazing work. And as for this podcast,
Speaker:have you subscribed yet? Have you followed? Be sure
Speaker:to follow this podcast and share it with a
Speaker:friend today. And what will really make my day is, if
Speaker:you haven't already, if you would, please leave a review,
Speaker:because independent podcasters like myself
Speaker:heavily depend on reviews. It is
Speaker:amazing how valuable they are. And all the big
Speaker:name podcasts out there with thousands of reviews
Speaker:guess what they likely paid for those. So if you
Speaker:could please just take a moment of your day,
Speaker:fellow listeners, and leave a review that would mean the world.
Speaker:And then finally, if you've made it this far, thank you.
Speaker:And be sure to go into the show notes and check out the
Speaker:Patreon community I am launching. And if
Speaker:you donate $10 or more, you get to
Speaker:join a monthly Zoom heart
Speaker:chat. I'm naming the community the heart
Speaker:chamber, which was the former of this podcast
Speaker:and it is going to be amazing and I'm so
Speaker:excited to connect with listeners and hear
Speaker:how things are going. And hopefully Holly will be part of it
Speaker:too. So until next Tuesday, I
Speaker:love you. You matter and your heart is your best friend.
