Episode summary introduction:

TC & Maddog talk about the inherent value of failure and its transformative potential in our lives. It asserted that no individual should traverse the complexities of existence in solitude; we are here to collectively navigate the ups and downs that characterize the human experience. By re-examining the conventional negative connotations associated with failure, we uncover a profound opportunity for personal growth and development. Throughout our journey, we emphasize that failure is not a definitive endpoint but rather a crucial aspect of the journey towards success. Ultimately listeners are challenged to embrace failure as a catalyst for motivation, learning, and resilience in their pursuit of fulfillment.

Topics discussed in this episode:

A thorough examination of the theme of failure unfolds throughout this episode, wherein we delve into its significance within the broader context of personal and professional development. The episode highlights the pervasive negativity associated with failure, which often leads to feelings of shame and inadequacy. However, we posit that this perspective is fundamentally flawed; rather, failure should be recognized as an invaluable teacher that equips individuals with the insights necessary for future success. Our dialogue encourages listeners to embrace failure not as an endpoint but as an integral part of their journey toward achieving their goals.

As we progress, we explore the notion that failure fosters resilience and adaptability, essential traits in an ever-evolving world. The conversation emphasizes that when individuals confront and learn from their failures, they cultivate a deeper understanding of their capabilities and limitations. Additionally, we discuss practical strategies for reframing failure, urging listeners to view setbacks through a lens of opportunity rather than defeat. By sharing personal anecdotes and relatable experiences, we illustrate that failure can lead to unforeseen growth and innovation.

In conclusion, the episode serves as an empowering reminder that failure is not a reflection of one's worth, but rather a stepping stone toward personal evolution. We implore our audience to harness the lessons embedded within their failures, encouraging a mindset that values perseverance and continuous improvement. By adopting this perspective, we advocate for a richer, more fulfilling life experience, driven by the courage to take risks and embrace the uncertainties that accompany the pursuit of success.

Walkabout takeaways:

• The podcast emphasizes the importance of embracing failure as a vital component of personal growth and success.
• Listeners are encouraged to view failure not merely as a setback but as an invaluable learning opportunity in life.
• It is posited that the journey of life involves navigating through failure, which ultimately fosters resilience and understanding.
• The discussion highlights the necessity of having systems in place to effectively manage and learn from failures encountered along one's path.

More about E-Walkabout:

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“St. Mike's Fortunes”

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Electronic Walkabout. No one should have to walk through life alone. We share the good times, the bad times, and the best times.

Everyone needs a little direction now and again. And TC and Mad Dog are here to show you the way. A podcast where we talk about the important things in life. Come journey with us.

The Electronic Walkabout.

Well, good afternoon, Mad Dog. Today we're going to look at something typically seen as negative, but from a positive side to really hit home its value in our lives.

Okay, I like looking at things from a positive lens.

So is your glass normally half empty or half full?

Half full. Oh, I gave up being negative a long time ago.

I'm on the same page with you there. It doesn't help anybody. And what I'm really talking about is failure or one step forward. And failure is a practice.

And I know, I think we may or may not have talked about the value of failure, but we're going to talk about it from a different couple of different perspectives.

But generally the word failure carries a heavy negative connotation due to a combination of evolutionary psychology, societal conditioning, and the internalized fear of shame. That seems like a lot, and I.

Think that'll pretty heavy.

I think it'll buy you a counseling session at any time you fail. By the sounds of it. It's widely viewed as the opposite of success.

A dirty word associated with incompetence, disappointment, and a lack of self worth.

Yeah, again, I'm interested. I'm not going to make a comment because I'm interested to see where this is going to go.

So, so. And I'll. I'll just answer that question a little bit.

The goal of this episode is have the listeners find the value of failure and more importantly, how we can use failure as a means of success. Simply put, it's about the journey. And in this case, the journey is failure.

Everybody meets it once in a while.

I just think that failure is just part of the human experience. And for us to beat ourselves up so badly because of the aspect of a failure, it doesn't help anybody. It really doesn't.

No. And you know, again, if you look at it through a different lens, you can look at it as a teaching or a lesson.

Right.

Not everybody gets stuff right out of the beginning. But, you know, I think the word failure has a very negative context as opposed to just something not working out it.

I can see how people would internalize that to mean much more than just maybe not, you know, meeting a goal or something along that line.

Well, I would suggest more so when you add the word disappointment, and I didn't really put disappointment, but we're going to talk about disappointment before we get into the failure thing in just a second. I just want to start with the thought of the day.

Becoming an expert in any field allows you the material to write your first book, the Art of Failure.

Quite a few people have written that first chapter. I know I have.

Disappointment. I think they almost go hand in foot together when we talk about failure. And that's, I guess it's back to that word shame.

Because you don't want to disappoint someone you care about in your life. And whether they're disappointed in you or you think they're disappointed, it doesn't matter. The D word is there. So it's how you manage that.

Because if you can take that out of the equation and really look at the positive aspect of failure. Because let me, let me put it this way. Do you learn something from. From a. From a failure? Yes, absolutely.

Yeah.

And that, and that's not to say that you're not going to make the same mistake over and over again, but it's when the light bulb comes on and realizes, okay, I know how to fix this now, that it makes a difference, really.

And you could use something as simple as going to get your driver's license. You know, you didn't pass, but you failed your failure. We're not going to stop there.

Like, everybody wants to drive and young people want to have their car, so they keep going it again and going, but then they learn. But yeah, if it's something different like at work, I know you're a failure. So I also think the delivery is pretty poignant to how people take that.

Oh, for sure. And we've talked about that before.

And, and the last thing you want to do, first of all, is get down on someone for actually taking a chance, doing the action and not coming up with the desired result. Because again, getting back to the whole journey thing, that is just part of the journey.

And I kind of, kind of alluded to it, but, but failures, is it not just part of human behavior?

Absolutely. We weren't meant to get everything right right out the gate.

And, you know, like I said, maybe failure is a harsh word sometimes, but yeah, you got a 50% chance of something going well or not, and everybody's got to roll the dice once in a while.

And, and, and the funny thing about it, if I were that one, and I'm not, I'll make it quite clear that I was successful with every swing of the bat and I didn't know how to deal with failure when I struck out. That can be very devastating, especially if, let's say, you've had a pretty good run where you had. You've met with success, success, success.

And all of a sudden, and people look at you and say, well, how does he do that? How. It might be just sheer luck, but at the end of the day, it.

Happens to everybody and you know it. I think when you don't fail or come up short of your goal, you know, you're.

You're not taught any adversity and how to manage, you know, difficult times.

And I remember a story that my old business partner told me that he was good friends with a fighter who had won his first 30 matches, like 33, 0, and then.

But that first loss that he had almost ended everything because, you know, he had been on the top of the world for 30 fights in a row, and the one time he lost, he. It didn't compute. And it almost derailed everything. So, you know, yeah, there, there's good and bad with, you know, avoiding failure.

But, you know, it. It does truly, there's got to be a takeaway when you do fail.

There's always a takeaway for sure. And then kind of leads to this next question. Why is it important to own our own mistakes or failures for that matter? That.

That's, that's how you learn, right?

If, if you're just pointing fingers at everything else as to why it didn't work out or why the world was against you or why, why, you know, and, and not owning your. Are you learning from it? Are you taking anything away from it? Can you do better?

So there's gotta be some humbleness when it comes to failure and your rule in it.

And if that's the case, does it, does that not answer the question why it's so important when it comes to success? At least that's what I'm thinking. I don't know. I don't know.

Yeah, and we've seen our kids go through it, through sport, like they're not going to win every single game. And when they lose, it's crushing, but it causes them to drive harder, practice more, you know, really kind of open up their, their eyes and ears.

So, you know, sometimes it's. It's motivating. It's the exact opposite. It's not deflating. It just causes you to drive harder.

And I know we've talked about that, specifically kid sport, and I don't know if. I don't think Tyler was on that team, but the, basically it was a perfect record. Josh's team had a perfect record going into the playoffs.

Didn't lose one game all season and the only game they lost was the championship game. That hurt.

So that was Giants.

It was Giants, yeah.

Yeah. No, I actually remember, I don't remember the, you know, I just remember the folklore around it where you assume that. And that's crushing.

Like, never mind, you know, losing a game in general, but to, to have that entire season and everything lead up right to the finals and, and lose it, that's, that is crushing.

There was a talented bunch of kids there for sure. The coaching was I, I would say top notch for sure. Might excuse myself from that because I'm just a dad coach anyhow. But you know, I do contribute.

That's, that's our humbleness.

That's right. So the question then becomes what, what causes us to fail? What sets us up for that failure? Any thoughts on that?

I don't know if, if it's, if it's just that it's in, you know, we, we try our best and, and we do what we know and you know, maybe you didn't study enough, maybe you didn't have enough experience in something. So I don't think that it's. Yeah, I don't think people know exactly to expect that they're going to fail.

But you know, to, to be able to take that step back and, and, and look at it from a 5, 000 foot view and say, okay, what happened there? Because I wasn't expecting any of this and. Oh, okay, you know, okay, well I've, I can do it better this way.

So.

Yeah, it's, it's challenging.

Well, let, let me adjust a few things here and if anything resonates with you, please, please chime in.

But relying on motivation instead of systems, and we're going to talk more about systems here because that, that seems to be the, the, the I'll say the flavor of the day and takes you, helps to take you down the road of success.

Systems are just a way of doing things. Like if you were truly motivated, you will find a way to, to navigate through something successfully.

And it's still the same, same steps that you took when you didn't achieve rejective or failed.

So yeah, there is a fine line between motivation and systems and we're going to get into that in just a second. Failure to plan for obstacles.

Yeah, I think for sure a lot of, I think ego might come into that. Oh yeah, no, no, I know that and not really Keeping your eyes open to the, you know, what ifs or.

Yeah, I did see that one coming for sure. That's the when. Internal mental roadblocks.

That's probably the biggest of them all I would say is that you kind of defeat yourself before you can even get to the task. Whether it's doubt or, you know, unsureness or whatever you want to call it. But absolutely, I think that plays a major role.

How about this one? Making excuses. The inactive.

Well, that's not owning the failures.

Right.

That's the. It was everybody else. It was something this, it was something that. But you can really tell the people that truly do want to do better.

And it's, it's in the mindset. They, they can accept the lot. No. Gabe.

Yep.

Nope. Right. Gotta remember that for next time and redo and keep going at it. So it's. Yeah, I think mindset is your key to victory.

So the experts are suggesting it is because we look to reach goals when we really should be creating system. Think about that for a second. Okay.

Because it, it, it's a totally different mind shift because literally I sit down on a weekly basis and these are the goals I want to meet each. Each week. And then I review that every week to see whether I've hit it or not.

But, but included in that, I do have some systems that, that, that help me get there. But, but it's, it's not so much the goal, it's the system that lets you point to having that success.

Yeah, it's a guide. I would say your systems are, you know.

Yeah.

I have a couple of simple examples just to hit home because conceptually and I, and, and believe me, I think you still need the motivation, you still need the focus.

Because without that, with all the systems in the world, because at the end of the day you start to plug yourself into the system in order to meet that success.

So let me ask a question. And so establishing these systems is, can you do that without knowing the totality of the task at hand? Or is it just like a.

Are the systems a guiding kind of benchmarker parameters? I'm just trying to understand how you would roll that in.

It actually is bigger than that because the way you're going to build the system is, Is truly partly a reflection of your personality. So it. You tailored the systems to you. But here's some easy examples just to show you what, what ballpark we're in. So the goal is to write a book.

You think about that for a sec. How, how on God's green earth Am I going to write a book? Especially if I've never written a book before.

Yeah. What's the topic? What's the, yeah, it's, you would have to do a lot of research into that one.

So write two pages every morning before breakfast.

Okay. So breaking it down into pieces so that the sum of it doesn't seem as overwhelming or unachievable.

Absolutely. And it's, it's just that consistent action that's going to help you reach the goal or meet your success.

Here's one that, that most people, if not all people, struggle with, get into shape. So.

Fact, fact.

So here's, here's the thing.

Have you ever, have you ever thought to yourself, okay, well I'm gonna, I'm gonna hit the trails again, I'm gonna start running again and I'm gonna be month.

I think they call that one wishful thinking. It's wish.

Oh God. I, I, I often joke, I said I'm going to run a marathon. I just got to start training for it. I'll be ready to go in a couple months.

Like, like, literally you gotta train for a year or two before you can actually engage in that type of race.

Yeah. So here's not having the system in place for that. I guess that one would be just walk five minutes a day, start off that way.

Oh yeah, for sure you would. That's exactly it.

You And I've, I've seen the programs where you do literally start with the baby steps and the walking and then progress the jogging and then into hardcore running. But the system for getting in shape is pack your gym clothes the night before, attend to 30 minute class at 7am on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays.

So establishing the routine, you're establishing a.

Routine, but it's, it's, it's as simple as breathing at this point. And you know very well, for example, today I had a five o' clock gym class. For some reason in my head I had it at 6:15 in the morning.

In the morning and I, and I did, and I didn't make it because I thought I was going to the 6:15. But I said, I got up and I said to myself, because I've got a system in place.

I was supposed to be at the gym today, so I went and did my own workout and then came home.

Okay, so you still follow through with it, you just.

Yeah, I still follow through the system.

That's good.

Yeah. And again, if you look at it making excuses, well, Jesus, I must have been tired or something.

But it doesn't change the fact that part of my goal, getting in shape is making sure I go to these.

Gym classes and they say that's the hardest thing is that initial getting through the front door. And yeah, no, I can relate to that 100%. I've struggled to get myself onto a fitness routine and the gyms around here are just like monstros.

There's just, there's so many people and it's just not my scene. So, you know, this morning I got up early and I'm like, all right, I'm going to go for a 5 1/2 k walk before work. And that was. Today was day one.

And I was like, I've removed all other excuses. So. But just one foot in front of the other, get out the door, go.

And somehow try and enjoy yourself while you're doing it. So it's not a chore. Yeah.

For the first time ever, just threw on an audiobook while I was walking. Because then you're just. Your mind goes somewhere else and you're not thinking of the actual walk. So now I was kind of.

I contemplated extending my walk because it got to a good point in the book. I want to hear it. I'm like, no, that'll be my motivation for tomorrow.

And actually, I will tell you this, and I, I can't remember where I read it, but if you're inclined to make sure you're.

You're hitting that peak performance every day, if you get to that, let's say that, that, that point in the book where you know it's going to get really, really good, stop. Because it's going to motivate you to pick it up and listen to it the next day. And they even say the same thing with, with your work.

If you're to the point where you've got everything set up and you're really get ready to push through something, stop for the day and pick it up tomorrow because you're you. The wheels are still turning. You, you. I'll just say you're going with the flow. There's motivation there.

That.

And it just makes a difference. For sure.

I agree.

So here are some systems or habits that we can consider day in our success. And again, we've talked about this. Focus on the process and track daily actions rather than outcomes.

Reward yourself when you do those things too.

Start. Smaller, tiny, consistent actions are better than large, unmanageable ones that lead to burnout.

A very quick, funny story about that one. Back probably about 15 years ago, I was like, you know what? I'm going to Start running. This is something I really want to do.

And so I grabbed my shoes, I went, parked the car and I, right out of the gate went for an 8k run. I couldn't walk for 2 weeks after that. So that's been the running joke at our families. Like, oh, you're going to go for a run.

And I'm like, okay, thank you, I get it. But yeah, to your point, it's like you, sometimes you figure out I can do this no problem.

And yeah. And you'll find out as you get older and older. It's just harder and harder to do that because I used to be able to. Yeah, I've been, I've been.

I, I take a year off just because I wasn't motivated. I'll just say, and then say, let's get, get back into it. And could easily get back into the swing of things within a week or two. Not so much now.

It's just there's a reminder of the age that you're. This isn't 30 years ago. This is different.

The other thing to consider, find accountability. You are roughly 65% more likely to succeed when you share your progress with someone.

Just talking to the dog count?

I think we're a pet friendly podcast, although.

Good. Well, then I'm going to have daily positive affirmations with my dog. Won't know any different.

Sometimes they're the best.

They are.

And I know when I wrote my first book, what really kind of got me motivated to do that, I actually voice it to more than one person. I'm writing a book. I'm writing a book. And then I've almost committed to them that I was going to do it.

And once you say that, it's almost like, okay, well I got to do it now.

Did you have the follow up question after that? Like, hey, how's the book going? Was that, did you find that?

It wasn't, wasn't too much. But I'll tell you right now, Jeanette was there a lot of the time. She says, well, what are you doing? I said, I'm just working on the book.

And then I'd have this idea in my head and I would just peck away until there was like my brain was empty and then pick it up again.

Interesting.

Yeah. By the way, I'm going to start writing another book and in a, in a, in a couple of weeks here.

Oh, good. What's, what's this one on?

So this one is going to be very interesting and of course not, not surprising, I'm going to talk about some important things in life, but what I'm going to do with it. And keep in mind when we, when I shared with you the, the lyrics for. From my book Esprit a Corpse.

But this book is going, it's going to have lyrics only from Brian Adams songs.

Okay.

So there's, there's going to be songs that have to do with relationships. There's going to be a song that has to do with grief. There's motivational songs, if you can think. I mean he's been the Canadian icon for decades.

So it's, it's quite, quite simple to get into again the lyrics again just to kind of spark that, spark that out.

So I'm probably going to be away for a couple weeks in the next little bit here and I'll have some time in the hotel that kind of firm it up because I've already got the structure and what I want to talk about in each chapter. It's just time to. And I hate to say it like this. Can you even say put pen to paper anymore? And does anybody understand that?

I understand it, but yes, it is still an applicable term.

Yeah, figuratively speaking. But I'll just say that the, the keyboards on my laptop are going to be on fire. On fire. Experience Experiencing some exercise. Here's.

See what I've just done. I've kind of committed to that.

You've committed?

Yeah. And I, I will.

And I would put a timeline on the book, although I do have an idea of where I'm going to put a timeline just to again keep it in perspective. But just by doing that, that, that's my motivation. Okay.

Now I've started, started committing and I like the idea of the book because it's, it's not going to touch upon my policing career at all.

It's not interesting.

It. It's more about what we, what we experience in life and how we can make a happier life. That's, that's kind of the easy way.

To look at it now. Everybody needs a little of that, that's for sure.

Yeah, for sure. So here's another thing to consider. Embrace boredom.

The difference between success and failure is often doing the boring, repetitive work even when you don't feel like it.

Yeah, that's. That's the thing. And yeah, I've with true work have embraced that. Usually, you know, on flights and airports, it's just like doo doo, doo, doo.

But I've actually tried to make use of those down times to whether it's other projects or still within the parameters of work Because I'm traveling for work. But yeah, that's, that is a tricky one because sometimes you do just like to kick back and relax and embrace the boredom.

But it can also be productive.

Oh, definitely.

And, and it, and I often think about the, again I mentioned world class athletes, but I want to, just want to talk about Steve, Steve Nash a little bit because if, if you look at, and follow his progress from let's say high school basketball to the NBA, he's so non assuming as to where he got to where he's at.

And part of it, I'm sure is, was overcoming the boredom because if I, if I said, okay, well I need to work on my, my free throws and I spent literally an hour, two hours a day doing that. You would certainly get bored doing that in any, anytime flat if it's a three point shot.

Yeah. But you'd be good at it when you were done.

Oh yeah, for sure. It's really interesting because you can watch these world class athletes play during their games and they make it look so simple.

But it's what's going on off the court, off the rink, off the fields that truly makes the difference.

Ripping it out for thousands and thousands of hours, I'm sure. And yeah, and I'm a pro and.

I saw the same thing with Josh when he was literally and, and it was just tireless. He would, we'd get up early Saturday morning, we end up in Langley and what is he doing?

He's doing cones or ladders, working on his footwork for football, running routes over and over and over.

That's why they're still playing, because they're good.

So those are kind of some of the things that, that really, when you think about it, and, and I know we started out with, with, with failure, but really I want failure to be something that looked at as something positive and part of the equation.

Because when you put failure together with the focus, motivation and even I'll say mentors, then especially if, if I fail and I go to, I go to my, my mentor and say, well, what happened here? What did I do that caused me to fail? There should be something that comes out of that to keep going, keep going, keep going.

Especially if you come back and you achieve said result after that failure, that should just be a huge feather in the cap and really kind of light that fire to, to continue on because you beat that failure.

So at the end of the day, if I could invite the listeners just to get really, really good at being.

A failure, I don't know if that's the wording for it, but just embrace failure and use it as a positive tool.

There we go. That's. That's perfect. So, again, that music is telling us that this episode has come to an end, but failure really is an option.

And let's put it in the right context. Focus on systems to overcome your failure. Take what you have learned from your failure and build on your success.

Keep it small and simple, and the baby steps will take you to where you want to go.

I like that. Don't let failure define you. Let it motivate you.

Yes. Perfect. Remember to take advantage of the moment before the moment takes advantage of you.

To learn more about E-Walkabout, please visit us at eWalkabout.ca.