When Matthew was single in his mid-30s there was a woman he had known who had made it clear that she was interested in him.
They ended up going to dinner and sleeping together.
The next day, in the guise of Matthew being honest with her, he told her he did not see this going anywhere. And she said “Oh I do. I’ll prove it to you.”
Everything inside him was saying “I don’t think I’m gonna change my mind. I don’t think my feelings are going to change about you.”
But instead of holding true to his “Yes” they proceeded to have a crazy relationship, where he thought he was getting company and intimacy whenever he wanted it and she was falling deeper and deeper for him.
Matthew finally realized he was out of integrity and was doing nothing but harm to her and himself by staying in the relationship.
Matthew and Orna met through a business networking group. They had been in this group for about a year and never spoken to each other.
One morning Orna sat at Matthew’s table and something told him he needed to talk to her. It was a curiosity.
Instead of asking her on a date, he asked her on a one-on-one business networking meeting. And that meeting went on for about 3 hours and they really haven’t been apart since.