Ghia—This fall, instead of fasting from food for my Fall Equinox Celebration of Jesus Christ, I plan on joining the Desert Mothers and fasting from words.

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Hooray.

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Gia here.

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Welcome to the Creative Spiritual Journey

podcast where Judy and I explore faith,

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nature, and the simple practices that

bring wonder and joy to everyday life.

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I'm very excited about today's episode

because here in the Northern Hemisphere,

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the fall equinox is around the corner.

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This year it lands on September

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22nd,

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ghia: which means that it's time for my

fall equinox celebration of Jesus Christ.

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As you may have noticed, my theme

for this year's celebrations

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have revolved around fasting.

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But because I'm in the middle of a

miniseries about praying without words,

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my thoughts around fasting have morphed

and changed in ways I never expected.

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But before I get into that, I wanna

talk for just a moment about the fall

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equinox, because this is the part of

the celebration where we connect to

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the Earth, which I believe connects

us more fully to Jesus Christ and

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helps us to gain a unique perspective

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On what we are on this Earth to experience

and learn as I have mentioned before

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most people talk about the Equinox

being a time of balance But it never

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feels balanced to me; it feels like

a time of change or a tipping point

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as we move into a different season.

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Recently though, I had a new

impression: This came from imagining

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myself in a yoga class doing a

balance posture maybe something

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like tree pose do you know that one?

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It's where you stand on one foot and

put the other foot just above your

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knee with your hands in prayer position

over your heart then you're supposed

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to balance there for a few breaths or

even many breaths depending on your goal

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But recently I had a new impression.

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This came from imagining myself in a

yoga class doing a balance posture,

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maybe something like tree pose.

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Do you know that one?

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It's where you stand on one foot

and press your other foot above

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your knee, and place your hands in

prayer position over your heart.

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And then you're supposed to balance

there for a few breaths or even

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many breaths depending on your goal.

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But, and here's the important

part, if you're doing this pose

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no matter how good you are, you

will never be completely still.

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The standing leg is constantly moving

making tiny micro adjustments to keep you

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from falling over, and occasionally you

may find yourself needing to swing an arm

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out or a leg to keep from falling over.

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Realizing this about balance has helped me

understand this time of year much better.

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there is supposed to be a sense of

constant movement, constant adjustments.

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I have to put on my sweater

in the morning, and before I

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know it, I have to take it off.

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That's just the way it is.

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It's a time of flux because

balance requires movement.

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I love that.

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So along these same lines, let's look

at nature and see what the equinox,

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this time of balance, looks like there.

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This is where I get to return

to my theme of fasting.

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The fall equinox is a great time to

explore fasting because the natural

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world itself is entering a fast.

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Trees begin withdrawing sap.

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Annual plants stop producing.

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animals gather, conserve

or prepare for scarcity.

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The earth shifts from

abundance towards restraint.

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It requires change,

adjustment, transformation.

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Dare I say movement?

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Our lives these days don't

require nearly the adjustment to

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the seasons that they used to.

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For most of us we don't really have to

do any harvesting or food storage and

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unless we spend a lot of time outdoors,

we hardly notice the temperature changing

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because our houses are conditioned.

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We can wear shorts and T-shirts

year round if we want to.

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We can flip on lights so we don't notice

that it has gotten darker earlier.

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It isn't until it gets really cold and

we have to go outside and scrape the

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ice off our windshield that we fully

realize that the season has changed.

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I think this is sad because I love

the idea of tuning into the seasons.

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it's a rhythm our bodies have

evolved with, I believe God has

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designed the Earth and its rhythms,

this repetition for our benefit.

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And if that's true, then what should

I be noticing as the seasons change?

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Well, there are all kinds of

things we could think about.

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Changes in relation to our food,

our daily schedules, our sleep,

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the type of exercise we engage in.

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Lots of things come naturally to mind.

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But have you ever considered the

natural rhythm of our spirituality?

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I'm sure we have all noticed a

spiritual ebb and flow, but have you

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ever put them into a seasonal context?

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That's where I want to go today.

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I want to take my relationship with

Jesus Christ, my fasting, my prayers,

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my fall equinox celebration, and create

a seasonal rhythm and flow around it.

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And to do that, I want to tell

you about the desert mothers or

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desert ammas as they are called.

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If you know me at all, you

won't be surprised that I was

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immediately interested in a group

of women called Desert Ammas.

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I love the desert and I love that

there has been a group of women

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that turn to the desert when they

wanted to connect more fully to God.

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So let me tell you a little

bit about the Desert Ammas.

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In the third through fifth centuries

AD, there were various Christian

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women who began leaving behind the

noise, distraction, and expectations

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of ordinary life and heading into the

deserts of Egypt, Syria, and Palestine.

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They weren't simply trying

to escape the world.

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They were trying to strip life down

to what they believed was essential

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and simplistic, things such as prayer,

fasting, silence, and attention to God.

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Some of these women lived alone

in huts or caves while others

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lived in small communities.

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They often supported themselves by

weaving baskets, making rope or cloth,

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or doing other kinds of manual work.

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They owned very little, sometimes

only a sleeping mat, a few clay jars,

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some books, and the clothes they wore.

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Their days were filled with

work, prayer, and ordinary tasks.

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They practiced Christian hospitality

and believed in welcoming people

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who came to their door as they

would welcome Jesus Christ.

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Over time, people became so in awe of

the wisdom of these women that word

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spread and people began traveling into

the desert to ask for a word of advice.

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The varied stories of these

women are fascinating.

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Let me share three . Blessed

Maria was said to have lived

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with extraordinary simplicity.

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One story tells that she headed

into the desert taking only a vessel

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of water and a basket of legumes.

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Years later, when three monks

were traveling from their own

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monastery, they came across Maria.

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She told them that her vessel of water

and basket of legumes had never run out.

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I love this story because whether we

take it literally or not, I love what

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it says about the kind of woman she was.

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She had the faith to walk into

the desert with God and believed

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she would be taken care of

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Then there's Blessed Marina.

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She wanted to enter a monastery,

but wasn't allowed, so she

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disguised herself as a man and

entered under the name Marinus.

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She lived there for years doing the

hard ordinary work of a monastic life.

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She eventually rose in seniority.

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While traveling with other monks,

she stayed at an inn and was

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falsely accused by the innkeeper's

daughter of fathering her child.

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Marina refused to defend herself

by revealing that she was a woman.

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Instead, she accepted the accusation,

was expelled from the monastery, and

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took responsibility for the child.

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Later, she was allowed to return to

the monastery, but was forced to live

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in an exceptionally lowly position.

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It wasn't until after her

death that the monks discovered

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that she was actually a woman.

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What strikes me is that she was so devoted

to the path she believed would lead her

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closer to God, that she stuck with it

even when the path became deeply unfair

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Then there is Amma Olympias.

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She was born into one of the wealthiest

families in Constantinople and was

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married to a high-ranking official.

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he died after only a short time,

leaving her a wealthy childless widow.

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she was still young and was encouraged

to marry again but Olympias refused.

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She decided that she wanted to devote the

rest of her life to God and for caring

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for others at first, she was denied her

fortune, but eventually she regained

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control of it and began giving it away.

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She gave away money, land, food, and

shelter to the poor, the widowed, the

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orphans, the sick, and the people who

had been pushed to the edges of society.

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She also founded a community for women.

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What I love about her story is that

she didn't simply give up her wealth.

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She transformed it by creating

safety, shelter, and security

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for the people around her

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Now, the ammas could be fiercely

determined, outspoken, and

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surprisingly bold; and they didn't

always fit the expectations of

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what women were supposed to be.

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And they weren't afraid to pursue the

spiritual life they felt called to.

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But I don't want to romanticize

every part of the way they lived.

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Some practiced extreme fasting or

other forms of self-denial, and

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they lived in a degree of solitude

that I don't believe is healthy.

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Still, I'm fascinated by what

they were trying to accomplish.

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They wanted to become more aware of what

was happening inside them: their thoughts,

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desires, fears, pride, and attachments.

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And they wanted to bring those

things honestly before God.

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Their spiritual practices were meant to

change the person they were becoming.

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prayer turned them towards God.

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Fasting helped them loosen

the grip on desires.

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Silence removed some of the

distractions so that they could more

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easily see what was happening inside.

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The goal wasn't simply to become

more disciplined or more spiritually

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accomplished; it was to become more

humble, more compassionate, more

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forgiving, more attentive, and more

capable of loving God and other people.

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I originally found the Desert

Ammas because I was interested in

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fasting, meaning fasting from food.

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But the more I read about these

women, the more I became interested

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in their fasting from words.

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They didn't use silence

as a form of self-denial.

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It wasn't about what they

gave up, but about what they

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were trying to make room for.

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Silence was one of the ways they

created that space: space to think,

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space to recognize and receive

revelation, and space to change.

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So it has become my idea that this

fall I want to use silence as a

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form of fasting, and conveniently

as a form of praying without words.

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Thus, I am going to employ silence

as a way to create my own quiet

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equinox celebration of Jesus Christ.

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I want to turn my attention toward God

and to notice what is happening inside

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me in the hopes of becoming a little less

controlled by my habits and distractions.

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And I want to see where this practice

leads me because if the desert mothers

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were right, the real measure of spiritual

practice isn't how difficult it is

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or how disciplined it forces me to

be; it's who I become because of it.

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So let me talk about

silence for a few minutes.

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As a side note, I have to

tell you about an interesting

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experience I had with silence.

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About eighteen years ago, I spent

a few weeks working as an assistant

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cook at a silent retreat in Italy.

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I wasn't interested in

participating in the retreat.

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I was only there as a helper.

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But my friend, who was the chef, was

interested, so we did everything

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in as much silence as possible.

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But at the time, I had just spent

several years as a single mother.

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I was lonely and tired of my own company.

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Silence was the last thing I wanted.

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I tell you this because silence

isn't for everyone at every time.

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But now, my life is completely

different which means that

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experimenting with silence seems much

more intriguing and only spending

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one day in silence seems doable.

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So silence: What is silence for?

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Across religious traditions, silence

has been used for many purposes.

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Quakers have the tradition of

gathering in silence, waiting

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together for spiritual guidance rather

than relying on a prepared sermon.

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In Buddhism, the practice of Noble

Silence is said to create a space

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for observing thoughts, emotions, and

impulses without immediately reacting

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to them or turning them into speech.

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In Hindu traditions, what they call

intentional silence can be used to turn

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attention inward and quiet the mind.

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In Judaism, practice of solitude and

contemplative prayer creates space to

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step away from the ordinary distractions

and become more attentive to God.

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Across these different traditions,

silence is a way of listening, observing,

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remembering, restraining ourselves,

conserving our attention, letting go

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of the need to control or explain, and

becoming more present to God, ourselves,

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other people, or the world around us.

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Perhaps what these practices have in

common is that silence interrupts the

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constant stream of words and information

coming at us, and gives us a chance

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to discover what's underneath it.

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In scripture, it's implied that silence

can create space for revelation.

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We're told to be still

and know that I am God.

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Nephi speaks of hearing God in a still

small voice, and the Doctrine and

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Covenants teaches that the Holy Ghost

speaks to us in our mind and heart.

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we're also told to study things out in our

mind and then ask God if they are right.

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We often think to ask, but then

immediately fill the silence by

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thinking through our own answers.

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True silence gives

revelation somewhere to land.

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It creates a space where we can slow

down, notice what is happening in our

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mind and heart, and become willing to

hear something other than ourselves.

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In my silent celebration, not only do I

plan not to speak for a day, but I plan

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not to engage with electronic sound.

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No podcast, no evening

movie, not even any music.

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I haven't told my husband about this yet.

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He may be a little surprised, but I'm

sure he'll be willing to go along.

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so that's my plan for this year's fall

equinox celebration of Jesus Christ.

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I'm going to fast from

words and see what I find.

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Now before I go, I have

some exciting news.

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The Creative Spiritual Journey

now has its own prayer meditation

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collection; a private podcast feed

where you can find all of this

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year's meditations in one place.

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No more scrolling through episodes to find

the meditation you want to hear again.

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The link works with most podcast apps

or you can use the special Apple Podcast

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link to add it directly to your library.

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I also included a small

but super cool gift.

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It's what I call the

repentance cheat sheet.

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No, it isn't about cheating repentance.

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It's about unique ways to think of and

apply repentance to your life that you

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may never have thought about before.

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If you are interested in either of

these things, the private meditation

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podcast or the free gift, please go

to the show notes of this podcast,

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click on the link, and sign up.

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And with that, until next week, namaste.