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The 3 Most Important Universal Laws in Human Behavior - EP 243
Episode 24312th July 2024 • The Demartini Show • Dr John Demartini
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If you are inspired to learn about three universal laws that govern life and human behavior, then join Dr. Demartini as he explores the law of pairs of opposites, the law of one and many, and the law of reflection.

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Transcripts

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The world's a reflection. Aristotle,

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in his paripatetic walks used to walk

in nature and see whatever he saw in

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nature was a reflection of his

own projection. And this is true.

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And I find this, that whatever

people judge in other people,

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they're usually telling

me about who they are.

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When I was 18 years old I had

a desire to master my life.

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I also had a desire to

study universal laws,

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natural laws of the universe sometimes

called. And I wanted to know,

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what are those? So I made a list of,

first I looked up universal laws,

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and it gave all kinds of eponymous

laws, Newton's law of gravity,

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you know, Kuhn's law and all

these types of things. And I said,

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I want to know what's the most

universal of universal laws,

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and how does it apply to human

behavior? That's what I wanted to know.

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And my topic right now is what are those

most important laws of human behavior,

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those universal laws? And

that led me to studying many,

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many disciplines, 300 in fact,

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and trying to find the

common thread to all of them.

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And I did find some common threads.

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And I found that these things were

referenced by various writers through the

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ages. And so I'd like to share a few of

those with you because I do believe that

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they'll give you an advantage in life.

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And there are things that I share in my

Breakthrough Experience Program and many

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of the other programs to try to give

people a competitive advantage and

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comparative advantage in their life.

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So the first of these principles

or laws that go back even into the

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so-called Big Bang Theory,

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at least that's the cosmological

theory that is common today,

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the standard model,

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is the very beginning of the

universe had perfect symmetry.

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For every particle there

was an antiparticle,

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for every positive and negative

charge, they were balanced.

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Everything had a symmetry. They called

it a perfect symmetry at the time.

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Today, we still have that

in some respects, we have

a conservation of charge,

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which is conservation law, and we have

symmetry laws that are still here today.

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And we find out as philosopher,

Heraclitus, around the sixth,

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fifth century BC wrote,

a unity of opposites.

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So the first principle is

the unity of opposites.

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That means that there's always

two sides to things you might say.

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And I found this very

powerful. I made a list of,

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I went through the Oxford

Dictionary many years ago,

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and I identified 4,628 individual

traits found in the dictionary that a

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human being can display. And

I found them, like antonyms,

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pairs of opposites. Sometimes they

were not exact opposite words,

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but they basically meant the opposite

things, you know, nice, mean, kind, cruel,

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you know, generous, stingy, these kind

of things, considerate, inconsiderate.

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And sometimes we put the word un in

front of it, or a in front of it.

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But it's basically the pair of opposites.

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And Mark Penn found this also on the

internet, these pairs of opposites.

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And this is one of the laws that are

there. There's literally oppositions.

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And for every time you take a

position, there's an opposition.

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There's even a law called, in sociology,

called the law of eristic escalation.

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When somebody promotes an idea,

somebody promotes the opposite idea.

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And if you take all the values on

the planet and put them in a blender,

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they cancel each other.

Just like all the words,

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the synonyms and antonyms are

just really, a spectrum, a circle,

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of similars and differences. One

of the ancient laws of physics,

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and of psychology and philosophy was

the law of similars and differences,

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which is another name for

these oppositions again.

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When you see somebody you infatuate,

you see things you're similar.

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When you see somebody you're resentful,

you see things that are different.

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When you're infatuated with somebody,

you tend to want to go towards the one.

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When you're resentful to somebody you

want to go away from them, in the many.

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But these pairs of opposites are there.

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And you'll find out that whatever is

promoted, somebody promotes the opposite,

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pro-life, anti-life pro-abortion.

Inside your body you have mitosis,

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cell growth and development, and

you have apoptosis, cell death,

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birth and death. Anabolic, catabolic.

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You have reduction, oxidation.

Build and destroy .

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Even in the universe, there's building

and destroying constantly going on.

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Every time a star is

born, another star dies.

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And the galaxies are

basically being recycled.

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In your body you have the same

thing. Cells are born and dying.

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The the same number of cells that are

birthing are dying in your body to

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maintain homeostasis.

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Homeostasis in your body is thousands

of different feedback systems to bring

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things into balance, the pairs of

opposites. In the study of philosophy,

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Zeno and other philosophers, Hegel and

Plato had what they called the dialectic,

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thesis, antithesis,

synthesis, unity of opposites.

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So one of the first laws is

that there's pairs of opposites,

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and they're actually not really

separable. They're kind of entangled,

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quantum entangled, as they say in physics,

between particle and antiparticle.

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Paul Dirac in his principles of quantum

mechanics in:

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put that and formalized

that, but it's still a truth.

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And it was known in the time of

Heraclitus,:

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way before quantum mechanics. So

they knew that. Wet becomes dry,

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dry becomes wet.

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Even Empedocles in the fifth century

back then talked about fire, air,

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and water and earth,

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fire and water canceling each other and

air and earth canceling each other as

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opposites, rarity and density,

gravity and radiation.

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Gravity takes parts and

brings them into oneness.

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And radiation takes from oneness

and goes into parts and radii.

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These are pairs of opposites.

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So one of the most universal

laws is pairs of opposites.

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And it's inside our psychology. In fact,

the second you infatuate with a trait,

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you resent its opposite. And

the second you resent a trait,

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you infatuate with the opposite. If you

seek something, you fear the loss of it.

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And if you resent something

and want to avoid something,

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you seek the gain of it.

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These are pairs of opposites

that run all of human behavior.

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If you understand the laws

of these pairs of opposites,

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as I explain in the

Breakthrough Experience,

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and I teach in the method that

I teach, the Demartini Method,

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you get to see how profound they are

and how useful they are to be able to

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understand human behavior.

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And it gives you comparative advantage

because now you can predict things that

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you wouldn't normally see if you

didn't know the laws that govern them.

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So the first law is

the pairs of opposites,

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that every position creates an opposition.

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And every thing you can label the

opposite is also available in awareness.

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And when you see one and you don't

see the other at the same time,

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you have what is called

a sequential contrast.

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And you basically have a social bias.

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And when you meet somebody and

you see only their positive side,

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you don't see their

negative side, you're blind.

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If you see their only negative side,

you don't see their positive side,

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you're blind. If you see both sides

simultaneously, you'll feel love for them.

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But if you see one side without the

other, you'll feel a judgment on them.

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And judgment is basically a separation

of these opposites and an isolation and

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assuming there's one without the other,

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which makes us blind and fractionate

ourselves instead of integrate and empower

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ourselves. So the oppositions,

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if you have the time to look,

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you'll see that there's always

a pair of opposites. In fact,

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you can't even perceive

without a contrast.

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If you go into a black room and

it's totally black, you can't see.

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If you go in a totally white,

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snowy environment where up and down

and everything else is all white,

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you can't see. But if you

put a contrast, you can see.

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All of our senses must have contrast.

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And contrast are really

the pairs of opposites.

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So if you understand that those pairs

of opposites are always synchronous and

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they're always paired together,

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and all comparisons are byproducts of

that comparison, that pair of opposites,

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then you realize that all your

judgments are incomplete awarenesses.

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And when you love something and

embrace both sides and see both sides.

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When you love somebody, you're going to

see the pairs of opposites. The nice,

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the mean, the kind, the cruel, the

positive, negative, the considerate,

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the inconsiderate, the

generous, the stingy,

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you're going to see that they're

both at different times. You know,

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if somebody supports me, I can be

nice as a pussycat. They challenge me,

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I can be mean as a tiger. I

have both sides, both opposites.

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And that law of opposite's

inside every human being.

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So embracing both sides

simultaneously is love,

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and trying to see one side without

the other is judgment and strife.

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And then we're going to be infatuated

with them or resenting them,

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and they're going to,

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we're going to put them on a

pedestal or put them in a pit,

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and we're not going to

put them in a heart.

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So knowing the laws of how to find the

simultaneity and the synchronicity of

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opposites is the key. That's why Zeno

and others put the dialectic together,

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to make us ask propositions,

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to make us see both sides simultaneously

and synchronize it, and synthesize it.

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And I define love as the synthesis

and synchronicity of all complementary

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opposites. All pairs of opposites.

So that's the first law.

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The second law is really

a byproduct of that,

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because those laws of similarities and

difference is the same as the law of the

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one and the many. From the one comes

the many, from the many come the one.

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From one point source light

radiates out into many radii

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and gravity from the many

radii goes to the one.

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So electromagnetism and

gravity, two universal laws,

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one by Newton and Einstein,

and someday quantum gravity,

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and also radiation by

Maxwell, James Clerk Maxwell.

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You basically have the four

differential equations, on both sides,

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they're differential equations.

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They're basically the calculus

of gravity and calculus of light.

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And they're all based on the

law of the one and the many.

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And now in our own psyche,

the same thing occurs.

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When you're dating many people,

you're looking for that special one.

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Once you got the one, your

mind wanders about the many.

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And that's the oscillation

between those two.

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And that's based on hedonic adaptation

and mood swings and polarities of

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perception, which again, oppositions

and the law of the one and the many.

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And what's interesting is you tend to

be attracted to people who have more

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people around them, and repelled from

people that have less people around them,

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based on the law of the one and the many,

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you're trying to integrate

and not disintegrate.

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So the law of the one and

the many also runs it.

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And when you're elated and you see

you are infatuated with somebody,

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you see similarities, which seem

like we're all the same. In fact,

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when you're infatuated with

somebody, you go, oh my God,

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we have the same number of

eyes, same number of ribs,

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same number of arms and

legs, we're soulmates. When

you resent somebody, we go,

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we're going in two different

directions, we don't see eye to eye.

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It's all about differences. So one,

many, integration, disintegration,

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build, destroy, unify, diversity.

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These laws of one and many, and the laws

of pairs of opposites really overlap.

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And they can be almost

seen as the same thing,

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because they're really

expressions of each other.

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And another law is the law of reflection.

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The law of reflection is that

whatever you perceive in others,

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you have within yourself. Now, at first,

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when I first thought about that

many years ago, four decades plus,

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I started to think, well, do I have

everything I see in other people?

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And instead of me waiting for me to

react to people and then go and find out

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where I do it, and I found I did,

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I just went through the Oxford Dictionary

and went through 4,628 individual

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traits I found there and looked

at where I had all the traits.

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And I found out that whatever

I see in other people, I have.

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There's an old statement

in in the New Testament,

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Romans 2-1 that says what you see in

others and what you judge in others beware

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because you do the same thing.

I found that extremely truthful.

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In my Breakthrough Experience program

I've proven that on about 125,000 people

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personally. So whatever you see in others,

you have, and there is a reflection.

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The world's a reflection. Aristotle,

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in his peripatetic walks used to walk

in nature and see whatever he saw in

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nature was a reflection of his

own projection. And this is true.

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And I find this, that whatever

people judge in other people,

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they're usually telling me about

who they are. And you find that.

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I learned that when I was

in professional school,

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this one guy who was a teacher,

he ended up being very,

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very cautious about people

cheating on tests. And I thought,

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this guy's fanatical about cheating,

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and I don't think everybody's

cheating in this room,

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but he's really freaked out about it.

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But we found out that when he got out

in his own world, in his own practice,

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that he was caught cheating and he was

projecting his own fears and anxieties of

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himself. And what's interesting is

whatever you resent in other people,

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it reminds you of what you're

ashamed of in yourself.

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Whatever you admire in other people,

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it reminds you of what you

actually look up to in yourself,

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that you're proud of in yourself.

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And when you realize that in your judgment

of other people are revealing to you

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what you're actually holding

inside yourself but are

too proud or too humble to

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admit it. So reflective

awareness is a great law,

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and reflection is

basically a law, you know,

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even if we look at electromagnetism

or gravity, there's waves,

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and waves have reflection and

they bounce off things, right?

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And so what we do is we

have reflective awareness,

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whatever we send out to

people, as it goes out,

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it's kind of like a radiation, as

it comes in it's like a gravitation.

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And so we can see the same

laws of the pairs of opposites,

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because whatever we see in

others, we also have the opposite.

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We found out that we infatuate with

people and we resent the opposite,

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we got both of those inside us.

So the law of pairs of opposites,

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the law of one and many, because we

seek or avoid, when we seek it's one,

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we avoid we tend to go to many,

fragment and separate, unify and divide.

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And then we also have

the law of reflection.

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So they're really reflections of

each other. So all three of these,

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and there's other universal

laws, but those are three,

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that are very powerful laws on how to

understand life and human behavior.

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Because whatever you see in others is you.

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And you have both the one and

the many, the one part. In fact,

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when you look at your life and find out

where do you do what you see in others,

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you'll find it's either

one big time, it's equal,

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or many little times it adds up,

quantitatively, qualitatively.

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The ancient Greek philosophers used

to say there's quantity and quality,

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degree and kind, multitude and magnitude,

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which is actually a pairs of opposites

that based on the law of the one and the

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many, and reflection. So I just

wanted to share a few moments on that.

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In my Breakthrough Experience program,

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I actually take you through an

exercise called the Demartini Method,

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where you get to see all three of

those laws, and others, applied.

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Now, when you're done, you

get to integrate yourself,

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you get to empower yourself,

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instead of judging and weighing yourself

down with emotional baggage and being

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distracted by impulses and instincts

of your subcortical, you might say,

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subconscious mind. You get to be

inspired, you get to self-actualize,

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you get to move in the

direction of what inspires you,

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you give yourself permission to shine,

not shrink, radiate, not gravitate only.

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And you get to power your

life. So I tell people,

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if they learn the laws of the universe,

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see what's interesting is the laws

of the universe are unviolateable,

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the laws of human beings are violateable.

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We go around with moral hypocrisies and

all the moral laws that we try to live

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by, very seldom do we actually

live them a hundred percent.

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And what's interesting,

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and even Alasdair MacIntyre in his book

on the history of ethics show that we

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basically set up all these artificial

laws based on wounds that we don't own

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about ourselves. And then we go around

and project those onto other people,

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and then moral hypocrites in our nature.

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And we try to live by laws that we made

up in our mind that aren't based on

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universal laws. I've been studying

universal laws for 52 years now,

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and I'm certain that those are the

ones you want to fill your mind with.

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If you follow those guidelines,

you don't air, you're in track.

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But if you try to go on based on temporary

moral hypocrisies of a local climb

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that vary as you go around the world,

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you realize that these

are things that are,

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you're going to be trying but not live by.

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And I'm interested in the things

that stand the test of time.

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That's why I took a moment to talk about

what are the primary universal laws.

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But the three that I just mentioned

was a law of polarity and pairs of

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opposites, there's a conservation

that keeps those in balance,

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charge parody if you talk

about positive and negative,

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and you'll find it even in the

hedonic adaptation in the brain,

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you'll find out that if you go above

equilibrium, things bring you down,

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if you go below equilibrium, things bring

you up, brings you back into balance.

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The balance of opposites, the unity

of opposites, as Heraclitus said.

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Then there's a law of

the one and the many,

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and then there's the law of reflection.

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Whatever we perceive in the world around

us is a reflection of who we are inside

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us.

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When we can honor that and respect that

and understand those laws and see how

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they apply, as I explain in

the Breakthrough Experience,

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we have a comparative

advantage in the world,

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and allows us to master our life instead

of being running around with a chicken

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with it's head cutoff, trying

to be something we're not,

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trying to get rid of something we can't,

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instead of honoring all aspects of our

nature. So if you're ready to do that,

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come to the Breakthrough Experience so

I can share with you the insights that

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allow you to have the

laws of the universe,

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ones you know you can live by

that'll stand the test of time,

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so you can stand the test of time and

do something amazing in this world.

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Give yourself permission to shine and

give yourself permission to create the

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difference and the legacy you

want to leave on the planet.

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