Welcome back to Dont get this Twisted

Robb and Tina explore a wide range of topics from fashion nostalgia, relationship arguments, to modern lifestyle challenges, offering humorous and practical perspectives.

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This podcast and website represent the opinions of Robb Courtney and Tina Garcia and their guests to the show and website. The content here should not be interpreted as medical advice or any other type of advice from any other type of licensed professional. The content here is for informational purposes only, and because each person is so unique, please consult your healthcare or other applicable licensed professional with any medical or other related questions. Views and opinions expressed in the podcast and website are our own and do not represent that of our places of work. While we make every effort to ensure that the information, we are sharing is accurate, we welcome any comments, suggestions, or correction of errors. Privacy is of the utmost importance to us. All people, places, and scenarios mentioned in the podcast have been changed to protect confidentiality. This website or podcast should not be used in any legal capacity whatsoever, including but not limited to establishing “standard of care” in a legal sense or as a basis for expert witness testimony related to the medical profession or any other licensed profession. No guarantee is given regarding the accuracy of any statements or opinions made on the podcast or website. In no way does listening, reading, emailing, or interacting on social media with our content establish a doctor-patient relationship or relationship with any other type of licensed professional. Robb Courtney and Tina Garcia do not receive any money from any pharmaceutical industry for topics covered pertaining to medicine or medical in nature. If you find any errors in any of the content of this podcast, website, or blogs, please send a message through the “contact” page or email [email protected]. This podcast is owned by "Don’t Get This Twisted,” Robb Courtney.

And welcome to another show, Don't Get This Twisted. I am Rob along with my co host as always, Tina. How you doing, Tina?

This is super early, Rob. I'm not I'm not awake yet. My voice sounds very masculine right now. It's very early. Yeah, I don't like to get up and and be functional this early, but we both got stuff going on and this is when we gotta do it, so here I am.

Yes, for y for you it's very early in the morning on weekend day.

Yeah. We we got a lot of shit going on. Like the days are these days are gonna be filled with stuff to do. It's like it's good though, 'cause I feel like I can I'm getting things done and not just like not doing anything. That

Right? I love it.

I feel like I'm getting my my summer in now. Like you know, with the visits and everybody I I left, now everybody's coming. It's it's I don't know. I'm digging it. I like summertime when everybody comes to visit.

Yeah, and I and I'm I'm gonna go on the road. So there's things that you know, I'll be I have to work in another branch. Gonna be good I get to see my best friend. I haven't seen him in a while. And yeah, and then after that go see family. So that's yeah, see? You know. Yeah. And and where the the next coming shows will all be kind of

Yeah.

I'm glad that you're doing that.

Yay, and I'm glad you're doing that. I've been giving you a hard time for a while now.

taped in advance. Well they'll all be in advance too because like well me and you will be kind of doing things so we have to like fit these shows in so we can so we can get out on time. So it'll be fun. But yeah, it'll be good. And you know, if if you are in Southern California like me and Tina are it is cooling down, which is also which is also

Who knows when we're taping them?

I love it.

Yay! I don't feel like I'm sitting in someone's butt crack right now, which is great.

I actually wore a sweatshirt to the dog park this morning. Yeah. It was like sixty degrees. I mean I wasn't cold, but it was like brisk. And I was like, All right, I'll I'll do that. So yeah. Yeah, not

Stop it.

I went shopping yesterday and bought a leather jacket and i I was like, It's eighty five degrees outside. Why am I doing this? But it's gonna cool down and then Yeah. Yes. I do. I ride in rain, I ride in fog, I've ridden in just about everything. Not in huge like rainstorms or anything. I mean, I'm not crazy, but

Because you'll need it. Mostly if you ride. If you ride in the wintertime, ooh, you will definitely need that.

yeah. I've ridden in just about everything and it gets brutally cold, believe it or not.

Yeah, that people don't don't get that wind is brutal. It will get ya.

Yeah, it's everything about the front of my motorcycle though, it it's all you know, to keep the wind off unless you open the little vent things, but yeah, it still gets cold. And if it rains on you, I I have an open face helmet and when it rains that that r rain hitting your face stings like a mother. So I've been through it already. Yeah. And I love it.

Right.

It is chilly.

Yeah, yeah. Crazy. That's good stuff. Well well and a leather jacket for for your motorcycle in the wintertime, it's good on a lot of different reasons. You know. Yeah. Look like a biker. Yeah. That's it. Nothing wrong with that. You know, we come from the eighties where like it's so funny 'cause like how things have changed. You know

And it's kinda hot looking. I mean I picked a really like hell yeah, I'm on a bike. Yeah. Right?

I remember a lot of leather jackets. People just had them. They were an accessory. You know what I mean? Like

Yes. I remember that that was like the first real gift that I bought a boyfriend when we started dating that that year for Christmas. And I know other people did too. It was like the the thing to buy. I don't know. I have

Right.

Right. I remember the the big thing for girls were I mean obviously shoulder pads. But what is the half the half jacket called? a bolero jacket. I remember that that was like, you know, it just goes we're showing our age, but like that was such a big thing. Well, I guess like they're making a comeback. Yeah. You know that everything.

Yeah.

Are they? Damn it, and I bought a full jacket.

Yes, but you need a full jacket. That that's the difference. But it it just goes to show you things come back around.

I do, I do. You know

Have you seen on social media the the eighties like a chat GPT thing, everybody's putting their pictures out? I looked I so I did it 'cause I just wanted to see it. I didn't post it or anything, but that's how my hair and that's how I dressed anyway. It was funny to see that 'cause I had a couple of pictures from the eighties that I pulled out and I'm like, hey, check a look at who which one's which? Like from what I couldn't tell because my hair really was that big. So

Yeah.

Right.

Yeah.

That was kind of a fun thing to do.

It's it again, not that it's coming back, but there's a couple of girls that I've seen on Instagram that literally they're like they couldn't be twenty seven at tops. this one girl doesn't say how old she is, but she doesn't she looks like a baby.

I lived it.

Mm-hmm.

And she has big hair, like 80s, yeah, it's super cool. And I I at first I thought it was kind of weird. I was like, okay, but maybe it's like not that it's making a comeback, but maybe you know she's in the metal and she is. But she showed a picture of her mom. And her mom had like huge, yeah, massive hair. And I was like, that makes sense. But I I think that there's something to it.

I love it.

And her mom had bigger hair? Yes.

I love it. I remember when I was I was just turning twenty one and my mom perm my mom and her friend would sit in the kitchen and perm my hair with a box of wine, you know, they would drink while they were doing it. But I remember my hair went from being from my butt crack, it went all the way to my bra strap. That's how curly it they made it. And it was wider than my shoulders. And it was freaking awesome when when I had that. I was like

Right.

I have a picture of that too. It's ridiculous how how how wide my hair is, but that I miss those days. Aquanet Aquanet still brings me happy memories, that smell.

Big. Lots

I remember walking walking past the bathrooms at our high school and you could see the remnants of hairspray coming out of the doors. This girl you and and huh?

yeah. yeah. Aquanette was a real thing back then. And they all all the bathrooms spilled like marijuana and Aquanet back in the day.

Yeah. And I just remember walking by because like if you the one thing you could see in the bathrooms was there was a mirror before you left. Like there was a wall that you had to walk around, obviously, to go to the potties. But everyone would turn turn that corner and there was a big long mirror and all these girls would be like

Yeah.

Hehehehe

I mean, I truly you probably didn't even have to spray it yourself if you just kind of whipped your head around every yeah, you would have just picked up some free hairspray. yeah, good good times. Good times. I'm sure a match would have killed everyone though. You would have to just blew up the bathroom. Yeah.

Yeah. Whipped your head in while you were walking through.

that's funny. You're probably right too.

my god.

The whole bathroom.

Everything comes back around. I've even seen some kind of seventies fashions kind of like like wider not like mo even more than bootcut jeans, like wider so like everything comes back around. Yeah. We'll have parachute pants soon and shoulder pads and

Yeah.

It does, but

I don't know. You know, fashion normally goes with the amount of money people are are spending and making and right now nobody's buying or making anything, so I don't think we'll get the extra shoulder pads and the and the extra pairs of socks like we used to. But the eighties was all about abundance. Wearing three pairs of socks was normal. shoulder pads making you look like a football player if you were a wom woman. I think that was just to keep your hair behind your

Good point. Yeah.

Yeah, right.

Your shoulders.

Yeah. I also think that it it brings your waistline in, right? It makes you it no matter what, you'll you look you look more triangle, you know. So yeah, it's a wild, wild times, good times. Hey, so I was going through like tons of old things that we have laying around. And I thought this one was kind of interesting because I think

Yes. Thinner. Yep. yeah. yeah. That's hilarious.

Old subjects, you mean. Yeah, yeah.

Old subjects, yeah. Old topics, old old things that I've written down. Even if they're not even like in my little show thing. Like I'll just go in my notes and like go, this might be something that's that's worth talking about. And again, I work with everyone at at my work, with the exception of one kid, is married besides me. Yeah. So I always hear like chirping in the background of

Wow.

relationship stuff. So it always, you know, sparks my interest when I when I hear this stuff. And some of the things they say, like literally, I'll I'll just go, man, I can't wait until I'm married again. And everyone kinda and everyone kinda giggles. but this one is it's the dumbest arguments that couples have. And I just think that man, they argue we we

Right.

As human beings argue over the dumbest shit ever.

Absolutely.

Ever. And and without going too deep, like let's start at this just humans before we get into couples. You know, social media is the biggest argument experiment on the planet. Right? It it's utterly stupid. I get to the point now where like I tell people mostly over politics.

Ever.

It's stupid.

It's stupid.

Whatever tickles your pickle, dude. I I don't it i if you're if you don't want to be my friend over over my belief in whatever, oo then you're just shitty anyway. Yeah. I mean

And that's stupid too. Over over a thought, you're gonna I can't be friends with you with you because you don't think like me. Since when did we care about that shit?

Yeah.

Yeah. the last ten years. 'Cause

Yeah, I'm over that. I tell people, Cool, there's the door. I

Yeah. 'Cause before then we matter of fact, before then we didn't even talk about it. We we just didn't. If something came up mm

Yeah.

And it it wasn't something that we even thought to argue about.

Yeah, no. Well, we were too busy having fun doing the things that we actually were friends with people for. You know, you didn't you didn't come out the first thing and go, you know, do you believe this, this, this, this, and this? Because if not, it's like Yeah, I I just I don't check boxes with people because if I did, no one would be my friend. And it's a fact. You know what mean? So

Enjoyed. Yeah.

I can't be your friend and I can't date you.

I get it.

I just sort of get away from that. But I think social media in general is just an experiment in how we can divide people and argue with them. And it's working. And and it and it's about and it's about everything. And and I'll give you it something that's just stupid and but argumentative. And it ha you won't even you'll get it, but you aren't even part of the subject. Sports.

And it's working. Better than they expected.

Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm.

Okay, because I follow some sports pages, right? Cause I'm a hockey fan. And I follow my team's Facebook page and how many fans shit on their own team. Just over like dumb management moves or whatever. And like these long arguments over like it's like, dude, you they're just a sports team. Fucking relax. Like.

Why?

See, and I don't even pay attention to shit like that. Like, I really can't be involved.

Well that's what I mean though. But it goes to show you that people will argue over people will argue over the fucking color of a dress. Do you remember that dress that was so blue? And people will so we'll argue over anything. And look, that's just the way we are. We're unfortunately we have bigger brains than the rest of the animals on this planet. And we yeah, right? We

Was it white or was it blue?

And we use so little of it.

Sometimes I wish I was just a bear that shit in the woods. I mean, a lot of the time. They just, they got it, they got it way better than us. All they have to do is feed their cubs, kill another animal, and then sleep for a long period of time. Man, we definitely got the short end of the stick.

Sometimes I right?

Yeah, but then they gotta stay away from us, otherwise they're put in a s a shitty situation.

Mm. Yeah. Yeah. You end up putting your foot in a bear trap. Although I think humans do that as well. Just on a different way. so the other day I was listening to the chatter in my in my work. And

I guess so.

How couples argue sometimes just blows me away. And it's probably because I don't, and I never did, even with my ex-wife, which probably got me in more trouble than not because I didn't argue, so then I came off as not caring. So right. So you're damned if you do, and you're damned if you don't, if you don't argue at all. But if you argue too much, you're a dick.

Yeah. And you would if you didn't argue at all.

Absolutely.

If you argue too much, you're a bitch. If you know what I mean? So like y We we have to walk this very razor thin line of of

I don't know, I think y you just I think you have to accommodate the person that you're with.

Exactly, because some people the arguments are great because you're actually getting something done. but just I see some stuff where and again, like I I guess jealousy rears its ugly head with some people. And I'm just past that, but like I saw I I heard somebody arguing about like

Watching a movie at home because it had a certain woman in it. Yeah, like you're only watching it because she's in it. It's like okay, like if you're arguing over that, there's much larger issues at home. You know what I mean? Like, I saw some I I heard that and I went.

What?

Why not?

Yeah.

Huh?

okay, like it it's not like you're gonna meet this crazy Hollywood girl, I don't know, ever. You know what I mean? Like the Yeah. Yeah, because you know it's never ever ever ever.

Right.

And I thought everybody had a a a hall pass for that one person.

Never gonna happen. And if it does and you love somebody, you'd want them to have that. If they wanted it that bad, you'd want them to have it.

Yeah. Right. If if you get that shot at, you know, Jennifer Lopez, dude, fucking take it.

Who's your who's your hall pass?

I don't know. I I'm I'm not starstruck about people.

Mine mine would have been Andy Garcia like back in the day. I used to say I was gonna marry him and my name was gonna be Garcia Garcia. Yeah, I like that. Yeah. I was gonna I was gonna do it and and then put an exclamation on the end just 'cause I could. Yeah.

Yeah.

Good. Yeah. Hyphenated? Tina Garcia Garcia. Wow.

Yeah. I kinda like that. That's actually that's actually really good. That is that is the most fucking that is the most like I'm with a star shit ever. You know what I mean? Yeah. He is. He's still a good looking man. Yeah.

Right? Especially the exclamation. But I used to think he well, I still think he's hot. There's something about him. He's sexy, yeah. So that was mine, so

I mean now, I mean age appropriate. You know what I mean? Like I I mean age appropriate, I would say like Selma Hayek. Jennifer Lopez, because she's in her fifties. She's still a very attractive I I think Selma Hayek too because she comes off more natural, like figure-wise, just like

don't do that.

She's up there. A lot of guys say that about her.

Yeah, she's beautiful.

She said I saw a thing where she goes, you know, I'd rather be a size, you know, nine and eat tacos than than be a size zero. No, but you know what I mean. Like, I I think because of Hollywood, she goes, like, this is who I am. And I'm sure she still keeps in good shape. Like, there's no because you're in Hollywood, but she's definitely like not your.

That's a lot of sizes though to eat tacos. Yeah.

Yeah.

You're, you know, zero. She's not a fucking wire hanger. You know, and that's coming back. You know. Well be here's the th yeah, because Ozempic works.

Yeah, for sure. The wire hangers are?

Dude, don't get me started on that shit. If you wanna hear an opinion, that fucking Ozempic i it's driving me crazy and nobody listens. I've I keep saying, Do you understand like these these symptoms you're gonna have? Start immediately when you start taking it. And yet Ozempic. Ugh.

But it but it's true.

Yeah, I I I'm one to say this, like, look, it it's a tool. Right? I I if you're six hundred pounds, you should use it. Cause it works. If you're a hundred and twenty-five pounds, you should be nowhere near it.

They're giving people that now for diabetes instead of like the normal insulin and things that they give and well they gave it to my dad and now he has bone density issues. He didn't have that before. He had strong like the the the bone density says it all, like what he was like and what he is now since they he started taking that. I had to beg him to stop taking it because he's gonna be a freakin' slug if we let it keep going.

Well yeah, because it works.

So what what you should do is if they want to give him, I'm not sure it works the same. So there's a peptide that has a GLP3. So GLP1 is ozempic, a GLP3 is a peptide. And it doesn't do that. It doesn't get rid of bone density, it doesn't burn muscle mass, but it also doesn't burn fat as quickly.

So it's more of a middle ground where it it suppresses your appetite, but it doesn't fuck with your bone density and it does it's a peptide, it's different. But but yeah, so I I think that like again, like these are the things where you have to look at the arguments of everyone. it it's definitely a a a wild thing for couples though. I

Right.

Like I said, I I hear a lot of these things and and petty petty arguments that couples go through that will end up being landmines later on. You know what I mean? Like

And it should just be giv getting a little elbow room and not being such a blown out argument.

Yeah. Exactly. And and I think that that's what everyone out there really kind of needs to work on, right? You're it I've not that I've seen relationships totally break apart, but I've seen small arguments turn into like mountains. And you're like, dude, why are you arguing over this shit with her? Like

I don't understand it. Or vice versa. You know, so I have a lot of female friends. You you get you just gotta go, look, squash this shit. Stop arguing over something that's fucking petty. You know what I mean? Like, are are you really going to like be lose sleep over a a movie with Sydney Sweeney in it? Like, really?

Yeah.

Like I would just go, yeah, she's in it. She's hot. She's also twenty five years old. I have absolutely no chance with her. Like you you're mad over fucking, you know, striking gold. That it's never you know, it's not gonna happen. So it you know, it's crazy. And or

Yeah.

Yeah.

That that is a crazy one 'cause I I feel for men because I've noticed that most women don't want their their mate looking at other women, but God gave them eyes for a reason. They're supposed to just like we as women are attracted to certain things like a beautiful flower or something something anything. Another man. Like

Yes. Exactly.

Our feelings work the same as men's do, let's be honest. Why why do we have to give a hard time if they have a if they have eyes to see things, why are we so annoyed that they see it? I have friends that get mad at their husbands for watching porn. I said, Well then fuck Like, if maybe if you did that a few times, they wouldn't have to watch porn and do what they're doing. Why would you argue with He's home. He's not going out. He's not

Yeah.

Yeah.

Change in your life. I don't know.

Yeah. Well and and that is generally with the exception of like crazy weird shit, it's a fantasy. You're right. Just have a fantasy with him. Or her. I mean, there's girls that watch it as well. It's you know, you're you're filling a void and men who and again, with the exception of like addictions and like

The the very far fringe thing. If he's filling a void because maybe he doesn't want to cheat on his spouse.

Yep. But but don't you know porn is cheating too? shut up.

You know what I mean? Like

I mean, I I don't think it is, but I I think look I I can see it if it's like I said, if it's overboard and you're it's daily and you're doing it, you know, sneakily or whatever. It's it's like

Where you're subscribing to different sites and spending a shit ton of money, that's a prop.

Yeah. Right. Exactly. If you're if you have you know, watching an OnlyFans girl and you're spending, you know, a hundred to four hundred a month watching, it's like, you know, come on. There's could be a problem. Well, find out the problem at home.

Could be a problem. Well, obviously there's a problem and that's what people don't want to look at.

Yeah. Well, because people don't want that uncomfortable argument there. That's an uncomfortable argument. Sex. Sex is the uncomfortable argument. Because I've seen it with people where they're just like, you know, you shouldn't have to beg your mate. You just shouldn't. I mean, there should be some kind of

I'm sure.

I had an I had a talk with somebody that I was in a situationship with. who's also had issues with a mate in the past. Let's just say that. and it was their relationship was overboard. It was only sex. Like it was just

Too much of it. And and I would the first thing I asked her was like, what do you think the healthy sexual relationship is per week at at our age? Like, what's healthy? and I think that that's a great conversation to have. So then you don't end up with an argument. Everyone's on the same page. You've you've said a healthy relationship is whatever, three times a week.

Mm-hmm.

Just to be, you know, throw a ballpark picture out there. If it's if it's eight times a week, everyone's happy and everyone's good, awesome. if it dips below three, then hey, is everything okay? There's there's some kind of then you don't end up in the argument of why aren't we having sex anymore? Why aren't we having sex anymore? Why do I have to ask? Why do I have to beg? Why, you know, because I've seen that. Right. Yeah, exact. Mostly for men.

Mm-hmm.

Why can't you initiate? That's a big one.

Yeah.

Mostly for men. I will tell you now. I I hate when people are like, you know, women shouldn't initiate sex. Why not? What dude men love that shit. Love, love it.

Since when?

I've I've heard a man say that he wouldn't initiate sex because he would get turned down when he initiated it. And I was like, Every time or once in a while and and I argued with him because I'm like, if it's once in a while, hey, you gotta give a bitch a break. Like sometimes you you just are not feeling it, or you're not feeling it at the same time, or even better, when it comes to women, you have to start

Yeah.

A a hundred percent.

Well before it's time to go have sex in the bedroom because they need the gear up. They need they they need to st to be stimulated well before it's time to go to bed. And I think that that is so frustrating for women because guys, you know, they're they're ready to go. Like as soon as you say sex they're like, hmm? Let's Yeah. I wish I wish that our bodies work like that.

Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm.

Boing.

It would make life so much easier. But it's like you gotta you gotta stimulate everything before the vagina's like, I'm awake You know, it's it's harder and and it shouldn't be an issue. You guys should if you wanna have sex, like do the things it takes to get her to get the ball rolling. I don't know, yeah.

Right.

There. Yeah. And and vice versa. Like mostly for women, knowing men are easy. I mean, I'll I'll tell you that I was, you know, like I'll give you an example where if women are know that they want to get it done, like the shower is the easiest.

Absolutely.

Yeah.

If you tell your mate in the morning, hey, come shower with me. That I mean, you're you're already opening the door of being like that. So like there's a place to start it off. There's lots of things. And then you you stop the arguments later on over not having sex. You shouldn't argue over intimacy ever. It should never be an argument. To me, it should never be an argument.

Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And it should be abundant on both sides. I mean, whether it leads to sex or not, that intimacy needs to completely be there all the time.

Yep.

And I and I don't think that there should be the stigma of women not being able to talk about wanting it. I don't know why that is such a a wild thing. I I've heard it with people that, you know, they're like, I don't know how you know, how do I talk to my man about it? And and here I am, I'm like, Look, dude, men are simple creatures. Just say you want to have it more. That's it.

Is that a thing?

Yeah, just say something. Yeah.

There's the you don't have to, you know, bring in a fucking chart. Like it we're we're easy. It's like, hey, I you know, I feel like we're not doing this enough. What do you think? And then he'll get the picture. And th there's ways of look, we're visual creatures. Men are visual creatures. I you don't even have to like lingerie is a good one, but

You don't say.

I say the other thing is just where skimpier things or things that show stuff off a little bit more. It it's we get the idea.

Yeah.

So that to me that's that's the arguments that you should that are just to me silly. Like you can nip it in the bud really quick if you have a a line in the sand. And I that's probably with most of these arguments I'm gonna talk about. Like money. Money's the other money is the other huge argument that I think if done right.

Mm-hmm.

Mm.

well before you get and again, long marriages, money is really a difficult thing because I think now,

Nobody has any?

Well, n or we we both have it. The thing is this too is is

Men are supposed to be like, You need to take charge and pay all the bills and do all this stuff. But the first time you tell your spouse you can't spend any money 'cause we don't have any, they freak they lose their fucking mind. Or or vice versa. It's both ways. It's like if she's doing all the bills and he's like, Hey, we need to buy this and and she says, Well, we can't right now, we don't have any money.

I think that, you know, then there's the why don't we have any money? I thought we were saving. It's like, okay, look, everyone should know the finances.

Yeah. You know that I when I was married I never knew the finances. He he decided that if I was to do the bills that I would fuck something up so nobody could do it as good as he is he did and I was like, Well hell that sounds perfect for me, you go ahead and do that. And we never fought about money. If he said, Hey, you you know, your budget is this amount of mu or this amount this month for whatever you need and then this month

It's this much for groceries. I was like, Cool, I didn't step over that line 'cause I remember my mom used to do that to my dad all the time and the arguments they would have and it it didn't seem fair to my dad that he would stress about the money because of her poor choices when spending it. And I just didn't want to do that to my ex so I didn't. We now it's funny 'cause now he'll let me write out his bills. We're not even together. But

Right.

you know, he leaves for so long that he needs help with that. He doesn't want to put all digitally, so I have to go and and write out checks and and get it ready to go, which I know that sounds bizarre, but I gotta tell you, it's working out just fine for both of us. I'm helping him out. It's not a big deal. I get to see the animals and he's gone anyway, it's not a big deal. But just the fact that, you know, we're we got each other in that way and we're able to do that, it's

Yeah.

It's working but so bizarre 'cause he would never let me do that when we were married. Hilarious. You trust me now? Like all these years what now that we're not divorced, now you wanna trust me like that? I think it's funny.

Right. Well and it just goes to show he trusts you. That's a

Yeah, maybe that's I it is, but it maybe it just shows a little something, you know, it sh definitely shows you something.

Well I think he just needed to stop a little bit.

So he here's here's another one I think that is is argued about a ton. chores.

Yeah.

where do I start with this one? look, there there's

Ha ha ha.

There's a

I think both people in a modern relationship, and I have to s preface it that because forty years ago it was very black and white.

What was?

Right? Chores at home 40 years ago, right? When we were 10, generally, and let's say 50 years ago, even before we were born, right? Or very young. You know, there was still men were were bringing home the bacon. They were basically gone all day, and they were stay-at-home moms. Different time period, different life. So we kind of have to throw.

Okay, yes.

The women

Right.

The boomers and early Gen Xers kind of out of that because it's different. We look at the world differently in a modern sense. which is going to go into the next argument, and that's time. So chores are a two-way street now. There's no way of looking at it. And if you think you're a a man who's gonna come home and your girlfriend or wife is going to do all the chores, you are sadly mistaken and will probably be divorced.

That's just reality. It and and it and unless you're making a shit ton of money and you have a stay-at-home wife. Then I look at things differently, you know.

Well yeah, because then that becomes her job. But if she's working, taking care of the kids, taking everybody to their to their games and their practices and all the shit that they gotta do, like I I found that really difficult was where do you find the time to get everything done? I'd like to pull out the refrigerator and get clean underneath it and yet I can't even get ten minutes to put food in the fridge because I can't you know, I can't even stop at the store right now. It's that busy.

Yeah.

I I struggled with that, but that was very much my situation. He said, I'll take care of the outside and you take care of the inside And he noticed when I didn't do something, but the weeds that got four four and a half feet tall we we never talked about, you know, 'cause it was always, Well, you didn't do this and I'd be like, Damn it, I still didn't why didn't I mention the weeds, you know? But who wants to who wants to keep it going too?

Right. Which is wrong.

Right. You it these are and these are fights that look, they have to happen, but they should only happen a little. We and that's about all that we're talking about. Like it you you should only bring up sex and it should be curtailed. Money the same way. Chores is a thing that's a modern thing. Like we have to take care of the house. You can't half-ass these things anymore. If and here's the thing: most men

Mm-hmm.

These days are coming from a single life where they did all that shit anyway. There's no excuse. Like

Yeah. Yep, I agree. You know, another another one that I remember now was I didn't put the scissors in the exact location. I literally same drawer, just I put them towards the back instead of the front and when he went to get his scissors they weren't right there in the front. He didn't open the d drawer to look and see that they slid back and

Draw the whole way.

He's like, what did you do with my scissors? You have your own scissors. I'm like, what are you talking about? I didn't I didn't. You left your scissors out. I put them right here. I opened the drawer. I grabbed them and held them up to him. And he's like, Well, they weren't where I put them. I was like, Well shit, look around. Same thing if the refrigerator. If I if I told him, Yeah, it's in the fridge, I'd come home. Well, you didn't put you didn't put dinner in the fridge for me to heat up. I'm like, the hell I didn't. It's right here. well, you said it was on this shelf.

Yeah, they're right there.

Right.

Yeah. It a and this is the problem with people who have lived alone or are for way too long or are just super duper anal. Like I I I'm a creep right. He he hits that one.

W I stand corrected. You couldn't look on the next one?

Yeah.

I think he he

He ran the the rail on that.

Right. And now I'm just a creature of habit. So that would I I wouldn't freak out. I'd just I'd scream across the house like, Hey, where's my stuff in here? And that's all I would do, 'cause I wouldn't argue over it. I would just go, I know it's in here, I just don't know where the fuck it's at. Like help me out. So and I get that. Which turn turns us back to exactly what you just said. And time. Couples fight about work life balance a lot, right?

Yeah. Right.

Mm-hmm.

Be because look, we're this is again, we're damned if you do what we don't. If you work less, you make less money, so you don't have money, so you argue about money. You work too much, you're not here with the family, or we don't do enough things, so you argue about time. So at some point you gotta look at at the situation and go,

Yes.

Which one do you want? Do you want a fuck ton of money so we live good and we see each other very low? Or do I not make a lot of money and we struggle a little but we see each other a lot?

I I'm at a time in my life where I just want to be good with money. Like I don't I don't care about jet setting around the world. I don't give a shit about that. I'd I would rather have a very good life with someone that I really want to be around.

Mm-hmm.

and and sit at home and barbecue and and sit by the pool and and relax. do do I want to go on small vacations? Yes, but it doesn't have to be this grandiose thing. So not making a lot of money, I think I would be okay with. And I say that now, but I do pretty well. So like if I had a mate who did pretty well and we live together right now, we'd live good. Yeah. So

Very well. Yeah.

But if I ever leave this state, I'll make way less money. So I have to look at the reality of that as well. but I I get it. look, time is the only currency that means anything. Because we have a very small amount of it. And as we get older, as we do, it's becoming less and less.

Yeah.

I agree.

Mm-hmm.

Mostly good time. And I and I say that with like, you know, look, a as we get older you can do less and you can you're you're not as spry to go out and do whatever. You know, you don't see a lot of eighty year old people at the club or at the bar or you know what I mean? Because your your body is failing us.

Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

So, like we're in a good time where I think that I I saw something that remember the movie Cocoon? You know that most of the stars of that movie were in their 50s. Yeah, there was a couple of older people that were like in their 70s that played old people, but a lot of them were like literally in their 50s, like mid to late 50s. And and you look at someone today who's 50 and they look like us.

yeah.

Really?

Yeah.

It's just a you know, it's a different time and I think that a lot of those people got rode hard and put back wet, like, you know, they because they grew up in a different generation, right?

Mm-hmm.

Well, not only that, but people looked old back then. They weren't trying to look younger, be younger, do more, keep running. Like they had a different type of lifestyle as well. I remember I I remember being in the in the pool with my grandfather and I asked him how old he was and he told me thirty five, which was bullshit. But then I asked how old my grandmother was and he was like, she's sixty something And and I was like, What?

And but you know what? She did look way older because of her style and and her li well, her lifestyle too. I mean stay at home woman, but my god, that short hairstyle that everybody had that looked good on nobody, you know, like like Ethel Mertz, you know, that that sort of why did they think that that made them look good? I don't know. But they looked older.

Right.

I think it was just it was quicker.

Me no, but it's if you think about it, they had to go to the hair salon, get their hair washed, set in curlers, they had to sit under the the dryer for like forty five minutes to an hour to dry that shit. Then it had to be then it had to be teased out, and then they went home for a week with it. That's nasty. I don't know why they'd I don't know.

Yeah, it's true.

Yeah. Well look at look at the eighties though. And and I know short hair even now I think as women get older they cut all their hair off. Because I I just think that they think having long hair is a lot of work and it makes you makes people think, they're just holding on to their youth.

I think it's less and less now for women. They're cutting their hair less and less, getting older and older, leaving it but they're definitely not doing those old lady Yeah, the bubble cuts.

Yeah, like bouffons.

Yeah. I remember I had a friend of mine, she had really, really long, beautiful curly hair. And I liked long hair, so like just beautiful. And then out of nowhere, she like hacked it off. It like went super duper short. And it surprisingly it worked on her. At first I didn't like it. I was like, she's like, you're gonna hate my haircut. And at first I saw it, I was like, Yeah, I really don't like it.

Mm-hmm.

I it grew on me. but I think I haven't seen her in a while, but I think she ended up growing it all back out again.

Yeah. I I do that sort of thing. I go from really long, like right now it's it's about three inches below my bra strap. And I can't wait till the pow to be over 'cause I'm cutting it off. It's driving me crazy. But I'm not gonna do that short shit. Yeah, it is.

Right. It's work. But it it's definitely work. I mean, look, I and I can I'm I had long enough hair to say that. I mean, I had I had really long hair. Yeah. And and it was curly as all shit. Like I I can definitely tell when people go, I I've had people who had never seen me with long hair.

Yep. You did you did. You had longer hair than most women. Yeah.

And they're like, well, you don't understand. I was like, and I'd pull out my phone, I'd show them, they I go, Yeah, I I get it. Long hair is a it's a lot of work. And if you have naturally curly hair, it's a whole other ballpark of nonsense. So

I understand completely.

Yeah, yeah. Which leads me to another thing that that arguments about is hair in the sink.

Tina (44:41.521)

my god. And I'm one of those I'm like, please get your hair out of the sink. My mom was the same way though. But yeah, that used to be a a source of contention. Not not so much with my ex, but I remember, you know, everybody was in the bathroom in the eighties trying to get their hair done and my mom used to get so pissed, like, Get the hairspray up, get the hairs off the counter It was non stop.

Yeah.

Yeah. Well, I'll tell you now, I complain to my kid because he'll shave his beard and his chest with a electric razor in front of his sink and then not wash it all down the sink. Yeah. So like I have a goatee. I when I trim my beard, I go out on my back patio and do it. I have a mirror that I hold and I do it out there. Cause then I I don't have to worry about hair getting all over.

Ew.

Do you so do you let it just fly away or do you sweep it up?

Yeah. Yeah. I mean it I I know, I trim it, like pretty religiously. So like there's not a lot of it. It but if I do go too far, yeah, I'll I'll take the broom and scoop it up.

Yeah, 'cause hair on a ground drives me crazy. And you don't think it would 'cause I'm a hairstylist but I'm like, Ew, can you clean that shit up please? It bothers me.

Yeah.

Yeah. I mean most of mine I think just kind of flies away. Cause like I said, I I trim it probably and I have one of those electric things that has like a guard on it. So I'll I'll do it like probably twice a week and it doesn't because like here's a funny thing too. I have a go t a full goatee, so like my mustache, if it gets at at all a certain length, I lose my fucking mind. I lose like to the point where like at one point

Yeah. When you're eating it.

I'll I'll do like a number three on my goatee and a number two on my mustache because it's so close, you know, that you can't tell, but having it, you can it makes it better. I I here's the other thing too. I I agree with that. here's another argument in the house. Toilet seat up or down.

Mm-hmm.

Yeah, that's funny.

that used to piss me off and that my ex did. He I noticed that a couple of times his passive aggressiveness came out 'cause he would do that when we were arguing. And I run to the bathroom. When I gotta go, I wait till the very last minute and I've fallen in and that's my god, that that caused a major commotion in our house a few times. 'Cause I don't look. I'm like running to the bathroom from straight being asleep. My eyes aren't open yet.

Yeah, I'm sure. Yeah.

And then you hit that toilet, pisses me off. But it's funny. I mean, thinking back now, I'm like, that's a good one, you got me, but

I mean, it's funny, but it's not. But it's not. Yeah.

But it's not when you got like toilet water on your ass and you're half asleep, that doesn't

And look and and look, it's a valid thing. Look, I this is what I used to tell people. just close it all away.

Mm-hmm.

See and that bothers me too because if I'm rushing to the bathroom and I bend over, I'm gonna start to pee. Like don't do that. He th the better thing is have two bathrooms. And you go to yours and he goes to his and there's no issue. I I am completely sold on that idea.

Right, yeah, yeah.

Absolutely. Yeah.

That does absolutely help having two bathrooms, for sure.

It does. It does. Once we figured that out it was clear sailing.

It's look, small petty arguments are going to happen. There just are. That that's what but part of this whole thing that I that I hear is these arguments continue over petty shit. The same petty shit. And I think that as

As you're in a relationship with somebody, you you have to curtail this stuff very quickly or you can't do the same petty ass argument for seven years over

You also shouldn't do the same thing that pisses off your mate for that long either, like some point both of you just need to come to grips with things. That

Yeah, a hundred percent. You

It doesn't make sense to me to even argue about this stuff. But I did.

You just have to yeah, and and look, I get it, but it look if if you do it within the first two years of being in a relationship, I get it. Like you're it two years is a long time, but it is on the surface not a ton. Like you're still gonna learn stuff about people in the first two years. If you've been with somebody ten years.

Not at all. Mm-hmm.

And you're still going, I can't believe you're watching this movie with this girl in it. Why? You just want to look at her. Yeah. That that's why I'm watching it, 'cause I want to look at her. Like

I pick movies because of the actors that I like in it too. I don't understand what the problem even is with that.

I just don't understand the the the jealousy over somebody that you you have. I would be more worried if I had pictures of the girl that we all hang out with at the bar down the street on my phone. That's that is way more worrisome than Jennifer Lopez movie from 1993. It's just like it I I just I don't get it.

Yeah. For sure.

my god.

And nobody wants that woman now, so it's not even an issue.

I mean, yeah, she's had more rings than than, you know, the Montreal Canadians winning Stanley Cups. And she's only married like two of Like she's like a ring collector. But I mean, I I just find it silly. Let's let's get to a point in life where the the arguments are for real shit. Real things. That

Ring collector.

Mm-hmm.

So then the rest of your life can be somewhat less stressful. Yeah. Because I I just don't see why. and again, the I'm the Paul, you know, I I'm I'm not in a relationship, so maybe I'm not the right person to actually talk about this right now. But I was, you know, I was married or in a relationship for 10 years.

Peaceful and loving.

So I mean I'm I was there and and like I said, I didn't argue enough and maybe that was part of my problem. So I probably should have. But that being said, I think that arguing over these things that are just so minuscule and so life consuming.

That people will be on the other side of the house because someone left the wrong, you know, forgot to put away the forks correctly. It's like like, look, there's there's such bigger issues in your real relationship. And don't you want the happier times most of the time?

You would think but most of the time it seems like in relationships I'm noticing that people just want to show the ugly that they have in them and not anything that benefits their mate. I don't understand why they'd want to fight to that degree.

and stay with them. If you're so unhappy, why do you stay? Like fucking get out. If you're if you have to if you're so crazy, and I'm gonna throw out the sock thing because that's my favorite argument for people. If you're so upset that your man doesn't put the sock in the fucking hamper, it you knew that three months in, because I'm sure you were at his house and you saw that shit on the floor. It's your fault.

That's true too.

The sock thing?

You didn't bail out quick enough. If it's eight years in and you're like still bitching that he doesn't put his sock in the fucking hamper, that's your fault. It's your it that's on you.

Yep.

I had that but that was me not putting my sock in here why do you leave your clothes on the floor? I'm like, Did you live through an earthquake? I want those clothes right there so that if I jump up I'm gonna put stuff on.

Yeah.

Yeah. Well, and here's the other thing. my my argument to you before though is too is that most men and again I'm gonna use our bell curve. Most men will just pick up that shit and throw it in there and you'll never hear about it. We just it's not

It doesn't matter. We might not do our own shit, but we'll see your. I don't want to complain to my spouse or my mate that she's doing something wrong every day. Cause then again, I'm I'm I'm really making a mountain out of a molehill. Like, it's not that important. Okay, you don't put your fucking panties or you hang your bras on the back of the door. Who gives a shit? Are you there for me when it matters?

Right.

That's what I want. I'll I'll live around some of the nonsense. You know, don't cheat on me, you know, and and and don't, you know, steal our money. Besides that, like, let's let's live and like I I can live with, you know, you putting the fucking dinner from last night on a different shelf. I'll live. It's not that important.

Mm.

But do make sure you put the lid on your toothpaste.

Yeah, I mean yeah. I mean, I think that's that's also kind of a health thing, but yeah. I I just see in and again, like I could live without that. Don't put your fucking shit on there. I don't give a shit. Like it's that's petty. It it I'm more worried about other things in life. But that's me. You know, maybe I'm just maybe I'm just too simple and I look at things way differently. It's just not that important.

Yeah. Get it.

Well thank God, 'cause back when we were younger Lou we'd fight over a bunch of shit that didn't need to be fought about. I'm glad that we got to a place where we'd care a lot less about the little details on that end. 'Cause that what a waste.

Yeah. I I care right. I care about my mate being there. Like when it matters most. When when a friend dies, is she gonna be there to to make sure I don't lose my fucking mind? I'm not worried about her sock being on the fucking floor next to the hamper. I'm just not. It it'll it it it it'll sort itself out. Just not that important to me. Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

Right.

It'll get there. It'll get there.

And the flip side is if it's if it's bothersome, like something big, you know, let's chat and not scream at each other. Like say, hey, you know, I really kind of told you about that. And and here's the other thing, with the exception of if it's like every single day, if someone goes, I just fucking forgot. You should be able to go, all right. I took care of it for you. Cool.

Mm-hmm.

All done. Look, no argument. We're gonna go have dinner now and have a good night. Instead of instead of now sitting at a table together, huffin' puffing, that you're you know, pissed still because, you know, I told you to do this and blah blah blah. Why? You could fucking die tomorrow. Then what? Your spouse dies the next day. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And that and that's why I told you that like

Yeah.

Right.

Yeah, that'll be the last the last conversation you have with your mate is bitching at him for whatever. I get that.

I don't we can argue all you want, but you go to bed together. No one go no one sleeps on the couch or in another room. That is the worst possible thing that you can do with each other. Because something bad happens and then what? Like I said, I my my ex wife, her dad died and she was out with her kids doing something. And when she got home, I was like, call your dad. She's like, yeah, I'll call him tomorrow. He

He died that night.

Robb (56:44.079)

Yeah. So look. And and I think it it she lived with it for a while and and I don't think it b she didn't think it bothered her and it it would rear its ugly head every blue moon. You know, and just think I was the last one to talk to him in the house. Kids didn't get to talk to him, nothing. So so petty arguments will could end up being something that you regret. Just don't look.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah, it's true.

Find a way to yeah, find a way to not have dumb arguments. There. You're just you're really just handcuffing yourself to something that is and it and what it does to your brain is and your body is not worth it either. Stress kills more people than stress.

Is it worth it?

Well and there's ways to get what you want from a person. Like I remember one time I I I heard and it w it cracked me up. He said, If you don't do this, I'm getting head tonight and I'm not gonna do anything but just enjoy it. Like there's not gonna be anything after this is payment for whatever I did. I thought that was the funniest thing. It made me laugh so hard, I was like, Okay, I got ya

Right.

And then sometimes I wouldn't do it and I'd say, guess what you get tonight? 'Cause I dropped the ball. Like it it became it became something that was fun instead of the argument. So yeah, think about that because there's there are better ways to get your point across than to bitch somebody out. Because you bitch a person out that's an adult. They don't want to hear it.

Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, playful.

Yeah.

Well, and you slowly push them away. And then you're gonna wake up one day and they're gonna go, Yeah, I want a divorce. And you're gonna go, why? I huh? And it was it was you've breadcrumbed them forever and now they're they're like, nah, I'm done. So look, people, just find a way to look past the pettiness.

Breakdown, yeah.

Well

Yeah.

Done.

And and find a way to look at your mate and go, this is the reason I fell for them.

Yeah, this is my person. This is the one that's gonna be sitting with you when you're old and your kids are gone and everything's really slowed down. You know, you wanna you wanna have them be a good a good happy person. You don't want them miserable looking at you like I can't stand this bitch. Who wants that? Who wants that?

Right. Yeah. You don't just remember you don't want to be stuck in something fifteen years later and go, Now what do I do?

Tina (59:30.083)

Yep, that's a bad place to be.

It's a horrible place to be. All right. So look, it's an opinion show. Don't get it twisted. You keep coming back every Wednesday. check us out on the social medias and the and every platform. People listen on everything now. And yeah, enjoy the rest of your day. Tina, been fun. we'll see you in a week. Bye.

Fascinating.

Bye bye.