A Wild Plan to Bring Peace in the Middle East

Hey, Earnest Mann here! Today, I’m talking about something depressing but surprisingly humorous by the end. We're talking Middle East conflict—a constant topic of tension and death between Israelis and Palestinians, something I've been hearing about for over 50 years. However, I’ve got a wild plan to put an end to it—literally, wild boars.

A Fresh Look at an Endless Conflict

This isn’t just another rant about the Middle East crisis. No, I’m suggesting a solution no one has ever considered—bringing wild boars into the mix. These tough, destructive animals could be the key to forcing both sides to channel their energy into dealing with them, rather than each other. My argument? Muslims and Jews don’t eat pork, and both Israelis and Palestinians would be so busy managing these boars that they won’t have time or energy left to fight.

My Nobel Peace Prize is Waiting

I’m dead serious, and if this plan works, I’ll be expecting a Nobel Peace Prize for my genius. If not, just make sure to hit that subscribe button for more out-of-the-box ideas like this one.

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I'm a deep thinking contrarian, a very pragmatic idiocythrope. I believe that function determines desirability and legitimacy. I don't like the superficial and/or pretentious, nor the shallow. I speak the truth as best as I know it, as a professor of tautology.

With friends, I desire quality over quantity. I know some very important life truths I'm just waiting for you to ask about. I have found in life, many people talk about happiness, but are unwilling to pay the price, or believe they shouldn't have to, because they are entitled to it, but I know with absolute certainty, that such beliefs are always due to stupidity, Insanity, or some degree of both.

This is not just another YouTube channel; I'm seeking to build a community of Intelligent thinkers daring to discuss, - and say - what the hell really needs to be said, so do the right thing, leave your thoughts, for me and others to possibly learn from, and subscribe, and tell everyone else in the world you know about me, and you'll stand a really good chance, of me remembering you, in my will!

I believe we really can change the current status quo of an idiotic and fucked up purposeless treadmill existence, and actually improve this world, but it requires intelligence, honesty, and BALLS, all three of which are currently in short supply, especially the balls.

Thank you for taking the time, to read this, and remember to avoid anything or anyone stupid, as much as possible, your life will be far better for it.

Please consider, that by visiting my website and/or donating to this show, you're supporting an actual person, not some mega corporation, that wouldn't know human compassion if it hit them over the head!

I look forward to hearing from you, and until next Monday or Friday remember, the world may be misinformed and batshit crazy, but YOU, don’t have to be!

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© 2024 The Earnest Mann Show

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what I'm going to tell you about in all

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honesty is very depressing but I'm also

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going to tell you about something very

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positive I discovered so sit back and

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relax or do whatever you find most

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helpful to relax and I promise you that

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you'll be able to say you haven't felt

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so good hearing about people killing

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each other in your entire

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life if you work for a Liv why do you

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kill yourself

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working if you're anything like me

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you're absolutely sick of hearing about

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the crisis in the Middle East Israelis

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killing Palestinians Palestinians in

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turn killing Israelis with no end in

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sight now there is a very important

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specific reason why I said if you're

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anything like me because if you're say

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20 or 25 you haven't reached the point

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where you're [ __ ] absolutely sick of

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this because chances are you simply

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haven't been around long enough to know

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about this endless insane [ __ ] storm

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better yet as a young person you've

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really got better things to do with your

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time and these times better things might

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be video games but in mind it was

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[ __ ] before it basically became a

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crime as it is today for a perfectly

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normal sexual encounter to be turned

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into a mandatory terrifying and

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traumatizing experience requiring years

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of therapy and meds Jesus Christ I'm so

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glad I wasn't born in the

1:49

9s where was I oh yes [ __ ] it so

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depending on your age you may or may not

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be really hella sick of this conflict

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now imagine if you're me I've been

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paying a fair bit of attention to the

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Middle East Insanity for 30 years and

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I've been subjugated to

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hearing about this Perpetual killing and

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conflict cluster [ __ ] for 50 years so

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imagine how the hell I

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feel I've given a great deal of thought

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about the conflict between the Israelis

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and Arabs for many years now and here's

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my big picture

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conclusion neither of these crazy

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[ __ ] will ever stop killing

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each other and here's why if you try to

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talk to either side about this conflict

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both will start talking about the

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troubles that were taking place since

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the creation of the state of Israel in

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1948 but the truth of the matter is this

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[ __ ] goes back long before then these

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people have been killing each other not

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just for decades but for [ __ ]

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centuries actually even before that to

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put this in modern terms imagine a man

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and wife that have not only divorced

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each other but actively continue to try

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to stab each other to death at every

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opportunity gives new meaning to the

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term irreconcilable [ __ ] differences

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doesn't it so as a consequence of this I

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always ended up coming back to the same

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conclusion I found over and over it's

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just like having two crazy

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neighbors Sometimes the best thing you

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can do regardless of the consequences is

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just stay the hell out of their way and

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just let them beat the living [ __ ] out

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of each other just let them go

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completely wild hog ass crazy on each

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other and

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that that's when it I hit something wild

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hog ass crazy of course why didn't I

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think of this before why didn't anyone

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think of this before Hogs the answer is

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wild [ __ ]

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Hogs so I have a plan and this plan will

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finally bring peace between the Arabs

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and Israelis the beauty of this plan is

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that it requires new military equipment

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or military operations whatsoever no

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bombs need to be dropped anywhere and it

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also Sid steps a huge problem between

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Arab Israeli

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negotiations no negotiations are

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required of either party because an

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absolutely necessary peace process will

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go forward regardless of how much the

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Arabs and Israelis love to kill each

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other and I'm going to tell you my

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ingenious plan in just a

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moment now before I tell you my plan in

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any detail there is just one small issue

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of my

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reward I'm not asking for much I'm very

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humble that way but if I am going to be

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the man responsible for this very long

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lasting hell if not Eternal peace in the

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Middle East I feel I should be

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adequately rewarded so I'm only asking

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for two things first 50% of the GDP of

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the Middle East for the next 30 Years

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and second a Nobel Peace Prize hell if

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they gave one to Barack Obama for

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essentially doing nothing considering

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what I'm about to do I'm definitely

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being not only reasonable but quite

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humble

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I'm stating this here openly now as a

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public record so that when my plan is

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implemented and it certainly will be

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implemented because there is simply no

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way it can fail the parties involved

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will own up to their responsibilities

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and without hesitation grant me the two

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simple request that I have just made

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public having made this request public I

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am daating that I am 100% serious and I

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expect the involved parties to follow

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through so here is the plan that I'm

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about to make crystal

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clear one thing that I have noticed

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through all of my intense studies of the

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Middle East for several years was there

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is a very big factor missing a buffer

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zone

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now when most people hear the term

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buffer zone they tend to think think of

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physical barriers causing separation and

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that's certainly true but it can also

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mean people and believe it or not

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animals you see in several states of the

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US there is a huge wild boore problem so

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much so that in the state of Texas for

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example there is a constant Open Season

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and opening hunting on wild boar with

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few if any restrictions

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Hunters can and do quite simply kill as

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many wild boar as they want but

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incredibly wild boar are so tough it

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requires a very high caliber rifle to

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kill one and their reproductive rates so

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high that even killing thousands upon

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thousands of them each year the

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population of wild boar continues to

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grow once I became aware of this I

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develop this foolproof Middle Eastern

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peace plan in the simplest terms all

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that initially needs to be done is to

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trap and transport several thousand wild

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boar from the US to the Middle East the

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wild boes are already well acclimated to

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the Middle Eastern desert climate

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whereupon they would do what wild boards

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do best reproduce

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so how in the hell is bringing wild

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bores to the Middle East supposed to

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stop the war and conflict in the Middle

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East you may reasonably ask well you may

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ask and here is what no one else except

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yours truly has figured out and it's

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shockingly simple remember when I said

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that Texas has a basically unrestricted

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position on killing wild board

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there's a very good reason for

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that wild boar are notorious for several

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bad things just one of them is that

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while foraging for food they destroy

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crop Fields but they're not limited to

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Fields a person's backyard or garden

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will do just fine and not only do they

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eat everything they also destroy the

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plants and soil around it in the process

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like I said that alone is just one of

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the many problems associated with wild

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bores so by creating a large number of

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wild boar in the Middle East and

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remember most Jews do not eat pork and

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Muslims absolutely do not eat pork so

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they can't even use them for

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food it would be everything the Arabs

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and Israelis could do just to deal with

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them and guess what but by taking all

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that time and energy as well as

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materials to deal with the wild boes

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they wouldn't have the time materials or

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certainly the energy to fight each other

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so as a consequence suddenly we have

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peace in the Middle

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East I'll be waiting by the phone for

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the call from the Nobel Peace Prize

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commission thank you very

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much now in the very unlikely event that

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I don't get a call from the Nobel Peace

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Prize commission please tune in every

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Monday or Friday episodes posting at 6:

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a.m. and if you haven't already please

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hit that subscribe button and give me

10:45

the ultimate compliment by telling a

10:48

friend until next time this is earnest

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take care