Show notes

Breaking the Cycle: The Flywheel of Disconnection and the Power of Connection

In 'Words of Wisdom 137,' Josh explores the essential role of connection in human flourishing. He introduces the concept of the 'disconnection flywheel,' explaining how disconnection from God, oneself, and others perpetuates a cycle of isolation and sin. Josh outlines a pathway to breaking this cycle through awareness, self-honesty, and authentic engagement with others, eventually creating a 'flywheel of connection' that leads to restoration and growth. Featuring quotes from Mother Teresa and Diedrich Bonhoeffer, the episode concludes with reflective questions to guide personal journaling and prayer.

00:00 Introduction: The Power of Connection

00:58 Understanding the Disconnection Flywheel

01:53 Breaking Free: The Path to Connection

02:53 Quotes on Connection and Isolation

03:34 Reflective Questions for Personal Growth

04:06 Final Thoughts: Embrace Connection

About Josh Kalsbeek, LMFT

• As a Psychoherapist Josh helps people overcome their greatest struggles.

•Founder and CEO of Great Oaks Collective, and it's flagship program Overcome, a 10-Week virtual Intensive Outpatient Program for Christian couples experiencing sexual betrayal and addiction. www.greatoakscollective.com. 

• Sign up to receive Josh's weekly email newsletter, Words of Wisdom. ​

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Links

Connection to God​

Dietrich Bonhoeffer, ​Life Together​

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Words of Wisdom 137 On the Flywheel of Disconnection Connection

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is at the core of human flourishing.

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When we are deeply connected to

God, ourselves, and others, we

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thrive and grow in profound ways.

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However, the true power and

importance of connection is often

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underestimated or overlooked.

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Growth through connection is not

a straightforward, linear process.

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It's a complex interplay of

factors that influence and

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build upon each other over time.

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In the early stages, it can be

incredibly difficult to see how

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all the pieces fit together.

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This is especially true when we are

trapped in a state of disconnection, and

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obscure our vision of a better future.

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The disconnection flywheel is a

concept that shows how disconnection

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breeds more disconnection in a self

perpetuating and compounding cycle.

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The more isolated and out of sync

we become with God, our authentic

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selves, and healthy relationships,

the harder it is to break free.

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We get caught in distorted thinking,

fear, and resentment, which leads us to

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try to selfishly control our own lives.

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This leads to isolation, which includes

dishonesty with ourselves and others.

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Sin and chaos then grow in your life,

which of course grows your distorted

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thinking, fear, and resentment.

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The more you sin, the more shame you feel.

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The more you avoid God and lie to yourself

and others about your selfish behavior.

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This essentially guarantees

the cycle will continue and

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things will get worse in time.

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Not better.

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But there is hope.

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We can begin to unravel the

insidious influence of disconnection

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by understanding its dynamics.

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Awareness is the first step toward

embracing the healing power of connection.

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A new pattern emerges as we turn

towards God, pursue self honesty,

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and engage authentically with others.

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A flywheel of connection,

restoration, and growth.

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Though it always starts small, each turn

of the wheel builds momentum, transforming

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our lives from the inside out.

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The path of connection is not always

easy, but it is immensely worthwhile.

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As we commit to the process, We tap into

richer relationships, greater purpose,

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and a life aligned with God's design.

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Slowly, but surely, everything starts

to piece together in a coherent

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whole, revealing the masterful way

growth through connection unfolds.

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Quotes.

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The greatest disease in the West today

is not TB or leprosy, it is being

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unwanted, unloved, and uncared for.

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We can cure physical diseases

with medicine, but the only

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cure for loneliness, despair,

and hopelessness is love.

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Attributed to Mother Teresa.

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Sin demands to have a man by himself.

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It withdraws him from the community.

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The more isolated a person

is, the more destructive will

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be the power of sin over him.

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By Diedrich Bonhoeffer, in

his book, Life Together.

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Questions.

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In what areas of my life do I feel most

disconnected from God, myself, or others?

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What are the root causes

of this disconnection?

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Which relationships in my life

need attention and nurturing?

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How can I engage more

authentically and vulnerably,

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even when it feels uncomfortable?

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These questions as journal prompts

and to guide your prayers this week.

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End note.

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Disconnection is a deadly disease.

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Fight against it with all your might.

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Live wisely.

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Josh