In this episode we are talking about our foundations.

There are cracks in all of our foundations and belief systems, but how can we begin to shore up our foundations and walk in a place of more healing and integration?

We believe that so much of our foundation is made up of how we view God and how we believe He views us. When our perception of God and His views toward us begin to get skewed, everything else begins to break down inside of us.

We invite you to join us as we discuss what it means to sit with Jesus in the midst of our brokenness and how He is the greatest healer and counselor there is.

Follow along at @Amesgirls on Instagram

In a world that has more than enough information and noise, is it even

possible to truly anchor ourselves and have peace in a scattered world?

Hi, this is Pamela and Mary, and we are a mother-daughter team who spanned

two generations, but share one message.

We will delve into what it looks like to be fully integrated body,

soul, and spirit, and will bring encouragement and hope all along the way.

We get it.

Life is hard and let's be real.

Hard doesn't even begin to describe it on some days, but we want you

to know that you're not alone.

And not only that, we are here to come alongside you and cheer you on as you

walk out your individual storyline.

So join us as we journey together and laugh, cry, and everything in between.

Welcome to the More Than Enough podcast.

Hey guys.

Welcome back to The More Than Enough podcast.

Hey Ma.

Hey, I'm glad to be welcome back.

I'm glad to be here.

I'm glad to for you to be here, ma.

It's good.

It's a good day.

It is.

It is a day.

That is good.

Yeah, your hair looks good too, by the way.

Nobody can see my hair, mom.

I know you can, but I, I I can tell them it looks good in the picture.

Yes, yes.

No, it does.

It, it's, it's cute today for sure.

Um, so yes, I'm excited about what we're gonna be jumping into today.

I feel like, uh, yeah, I feel like we've probably discussed this topic more than

like any other topic in my adult life.

Um, probably more just out of necessity because.

Felt so screwed up that I was always like, mom, help me.

Fix me.

Please, somebody do something.

Well, maybe since I might have been a part of that, maybe I was a

good one to give you some answers.

Yeah, yeah.

Or you felt more personally responsible.

Exactly.

Absolutely.

We know how, we know that to be the fact.

For sure.

For sure.

Okay.

so I'm super, excited to, jump in today because I feel like everything

has been leading up into this point, , even on the, the podcast thus far.

And I know that, you know, this podcast isn't meant to be like a continual series.

You are able to kind of jump in, but I do feel like this

episode specifically is really.

, , laying a foundation for what we believe is, is not just like, oh, the

most important, but like, is the, the ultimate, way to, be fully integrated

so.

. just to kind of recap, even from last week, I know we kind of ended with

this picture of You know I kind of gave a picture about my old house

and the three different kind of parts of it, of kind of like the interior

design, kind of being that picture of the body and then the layout of the

house, kind of being that picture of

the soul and the mind.

And then we talked about a little bit about the foundation the foundation of

the house and basically, you know, kind of saying if the foundation is cracked, then

there is no point to build anything on it.

Right?

Like, you just stop there.

If anybody's owned a house, they totally understand that.

It's just like the foundation is what

you're looking at.

And So if you haven't listened to last week, I do feel like that would be a super

helpful, One to kind of listen to, just to kind.

give you some understanding for what, where we're going in this one.

But yeah, yeah.

I'm, I, I, I know that we're gonna be talking about this like in the weeks

and months to come all about what it means to be integrated into the

person that we were created to be and how that is not a one and done thing.

And it is not a formula.

It's a process, and it's a journey.

This, this journey of integration and.

Yeah, and how we can just continue to walk that out in, in, in all the

things.

I'm not sure I said this last week, but it just reminds me of, uh,

The idea that these three parts, uh, they all have to have each other.

And I just, wanted to add that to say that, you know, these

aren't body, soul, and spirit.

It's not like we can choose one over the other because God has created

us to be a physical body, so if we, if we didn't have our body,

we wouldn't obviously be alive.

That's what houses us and that's how God created us.

And so, so again, the body we're not saying is lesser or inferior because

it's like, let's say we have different organs.

You can lose a

kidney and live on one, but you can't lose a heart

and you can't lose a brain.

So we call that a vital organ.

So our physical side is vital and the soul.

That, that's what we sort of derived from is the collective part of

who makes us, who, who, who makes us, not who

I guess,, who makes us, me us.

And so, so it felt like I was in a Grinch, the little

yes.

who makes

something who,

the who, people or something.

Yes.

Who makes us a

who?

But I, I think that personhood, obviously, if that part is missing

in us, then we would all be we

wouldn't be discerned to know who we are.

And of course, the spirit part of our man is, that's the part that's made in the

image of God.

And if we don't have that, we're, we're not

human, we're, we're like other parts of creation.

You know, again, just recapping,

reinforcing that these three parts of who we are are all extremely

vital.

We literally can't even have one

without the other.

And in this part, now we're introducing today is Mary's also recapping, the house

analogy last week with foundations.

I want us to, as, as we begin to talk about that, today is just

right now, even as we go into this conversation, I want you to see.

as these

Parts that we keep talking about.

In the practical, how life works itself out is our stories, right?

And our

journey and our lack, or really, none of us have lack of foundations.

It's just what they look like.

So,, but those are all essential and enter into all

integral and connected to each other.

no, Yeah, no, that's so good.

That's so good.

And I feel like that's such a good, a good point because even though it

reminds me of the verse, I'm the vine, you are the branches, you

must be connected to me to have life.

So,

I, I love that

picture

because it's like, , they're all

so connected, like you said, And yet if that foundation is cracked, you

can't build anything else off of it.

And yet those things above it are

super,

vital but,

With that being said, still that foundation has to be

shored up first.

And again, those other things

are kind of, I

mean, I obviously some of the, these things are happening

simultaneously, right?

and

I was just kind of

Thinking

and processing,

like, okay, like what?

Cause.

Foundations to be cracked and what we were talking about

last week about, basement of a house, you go in there and you

look at the walls and you look at the floors

like, and you look for signs and of cracks.

And I remember even doing that with

our realtor

And it was so fascinating

cuz I was like, oh man, like that crack looks super intense.

that

one looks like something super wrong.

And my realtor

was like, actually no, like that one's okay.

You

know that one's been kind of sealed.

Like this one's

okay.

Yeah, it was So fascinating

cuz ones that I would see to be like

oh my gosh, like these cracks are like, gonna

make this house fall down.

And she

was like, no, those aren't the ones We, have to look at.

Actually, it's these over here.

And she would like point to these random ones that I wouldn't even have really

noticed.

And she was like,

kind of telling me why these cracks would lead to different things.

Right.

And obviously I, even as I'm talking,

I'm sure

your head's kind of going to

like, oh yeah, that makes sense because again, our, our foundation is

made up of

our

story,

And so if.

You know, kind of think on that.

It's like we can look back on

our

storyline and

certain things that we would think to be like, oh my goodness.

Well that for sure was a

crack in our

foundation.

Um, and that for sure

Completely changed my narrative of life and maybe super bitter or super this

right?

And maybe sometimes, but sometimes it's

actually not,

Exactly what we're thinking.

And

so we have to with the Lord on that.

Yeah, I would say that the thing is, for most of us

with this whole conversation about foundations, , one thing

you just said is that, you know, you used the word perception and so, I

would just start by bringing that up, like when your realtor was saying,

oh no, that one's actually not a

problem.

but here's the thing, but what if, again, the analogy is talking

about life, but what if something that happened for whatever, whatever

reasons you are completely overtaken by that one crack that looks.

to be the largest to you.

And so then that, that's kind of what we're talking about perception, so to you.

So we're not saying that your perceptions or or your

belief systems are necessarily wrong, but the perception can maybe be greater

or lesser than really the problem is.

So maybe the big crack is what you're so hyper

focused on.

And in reality, if we sit with God and we listen to the spirit of.

, and again, I don't want that to esoteric.

I just mean being still and quiet

and maybe just reading or having a worship song on

and you're just pondering this one thing in your life that you're

maybe thrown by or em bittered by.

And the longer you sit with God, it could be that he's gonna really reveal to you

that maybe your perception isn't even

clear of the thing that you think is the, the major foundational.

when really he begins to whisper and you see this little tiny, you know, scratch

on a of paint missing on a wall, uh, of

that basement.

And God says, really, this, this is what's driving things.

It's just that you, again, it all gets to be really big and so much that, we don't

wanna give the impression that it's just

really easy, for you to uncover things and not just what's true,

but your perception of things.

But I would say to you that the Holy

Spirit of God, fantastic and marvelous at helping us to discern

what is true and what isn't true, and what our heart really is.

He can shine a light on it like nobody else, and yet you're falling

into his arms crying and in love with

him as he's showing you these hard things.

So God's.

Purpose.

He's for you.

He's not against you.

And so his desire is to bring these things forward to you, forward with

you, you know, for the purpose of healing and for the purpose of being

more intimate with him and others.

Yeah, yeah.

No, absolutely.

I, I

think

that, , once

we begin to assess and see,

oh there's, there's some cracks here.

How do we begin to shore up that foundation?

And I,

I know that, there's, all sorts of

things and thoughts and, uh, theories and self-help books of like all the things.

But I know

that, we truly believe that our foundation is

made up of, of how we view God in the midst of our storyline,

In the midst of our narrative.

How do we view God And

how do we view,

like how do we see that he views us?

Right?

so if our view of him and our

perception of him is skewed in the midst of

our

storyline,

and is cracked And

warped, well,

That

will break down everything else on

top of that.

So, Um,

So, yeah, and mom, I know that

you have thought

about

this a lot

and we've talked

about this a lot and just all,

all

the ways

cuz I think we look around and we see in

ourselves and then people around us like.

why aren't we getting

past these things?

Like why is this

person still So, angry over something

that happened 30 years ago?

Why am I so stuck in these same

belief

systems and

I

just can't seem to get out of them?

And we've read the books, we've gone to

counseling and

it

still feels

like

there's this, this like boulder

that's right there constantly we're

pushing against.

And it just feels like it's, it's hard.

It's hard to

know, what to say in those.

Of like, when you hear people saying it, or even in my own heart of

like, ah, I'm trying, I'm trying to get past these things.

I don't wanna feel

this way.

I don't wanna be angry, I don't wanna be complacent.

And yet here we are just staring at these cracks in our foundations

feeling, incapable and paralyzed to make

Yeah.

I think that, um, I love that you led with, Hey, I don't think we

have to convince ourselves, me or you, and I think it's a good guess

that we don't have to convince our

audience, right?

Right.

, pam: you know, that they have cracks

of help you, the listener, really join agreement that you know, we're cracked

So, you know, that's, that's why we welcome you to

join us,

So I, I think, , I think we are, and I think in this, , age and stage uh, the

timeline of the world history, you know, I think that's definitely, ramping up.

I, I think we're, we're, we can even become sort of almost obsessed

with our cracks, you know, and it makes us anxious or hopeless, so.

It's everything you said in the analogy.

It's very difficult for us to deal with things that are here and now

that are really being so driven by things that are way below the surface

back to that iceberg mentality.

You know, people are, we're all having conversations, but I,

I became, amazed and alarmed at the same time.

When people are

communicating, they're like on, you know, I kind of see it like a

hundred story sky rise, you know, this giant, tower,, in a big city where,

you know, somebody just comes up and you meet them on a, on the subway and

You just say, how's your morning going?

And one situation can come up from anything.

Maybe that's current and what you don't see is these two

strangers who one is maybe.

At a very high level of emotional maturity and insight and spiritual soundness.

And, and you don't know that they're just talking like everybody else and

they start to say something and this person, and so maybe that person is

on like the 78th floor of this hunter

story building, but the other person might be on the 22nd.

and this is where they are in their journey.

Now, how can those two people really fully understand each other?

Well, maybe if one of them was at the 78th, maybe they would have the ability

enter into somebody else's LA how?

Uh, house . There you go.

Their little, their little house.

Their little life.

Yeah.

They could come with some tea and, and because they come from a place of.

And strength, I mean, is in

Mm-hmm.

and in our, in our emotionals uh, makeup that's

been changed and transformed.

So what we bring to that is gonna, is gonna come from our overflow and our life,

right?

But, but what if one is on the 22nd floor and the other one's.

On the 20th or the 18th,

they, they might not have much ability or capacity to talk about complex things.

Okay.

That's just a picture.

I'm just giving a picture.

of how it's like in our lives with all the people around us and how we're

interacting because we're walking and, and living out, out of a reactionary place.

So, so we all are bringing something right to our relationships, to the

table, to our kids, to our spouse, to our coworkers, if we talk about how

body, soul, and spirit are connected, I would say this idea of integrating and

this idea of our foundations, um, we're talking about something that is, even.

Intertwined.

So Mary, I guess the question is, you know, what are some of the ways we

can even begin to think about building up or rebuilding, uh, even maybe

tearing down the old foundations?

I'm not sure that we can do that fully, but I, I do know that

there's so many clues that God

it gives us, and.

I think one of the first ones is to begin to really delve into the idea of, who is

God and let him retell us who he is And, , because I think God is actually screaming

loudly who he is to you individually.

and it goes all the way back to your very origins and that you know, you weren't

even conceived at your actual birth, but you were conceived by the mind and

heart of God maybe millions of years ago.

He had the idea of you and he brought you forth and then had you be conceived

and born in the time that you think of, but he has known you from the foundation

of the world beginning to think on that actually that is your very beginning.

So beginning to think on what is true.

Beginning to think on what is lovely and beautiful that will bring inspiration into

your life and will bring wonder and awe.

There's so many ways and we will be exploring, uh, many of these

individual things that we can do.

Another thing that can sharp your foundations is to begin to try

to begin to look at your emotions and you can begin to trace back.

I was feeling really great when I got up today.

But now why this afternoon?

All of a sudden I'm feeling so anxious and so I have a lot of people just,

you know, begin when they're feeling a negative emotion that they would

much quicker because they're looking for it to say, what set this emotion?

Oh, that's right.

My boss was kind of mean to me over lunch today, and I've just suppressed that.

But I realized, what am I anxious?

Right?

So we can do that in the spiritual area by seeking after

God, inviting him in, changing the music we're listening to, right?

There's having, uh, having coffee with someone that we know is

maybe ahead of us in this race to give us and glean from them.

What would you say to me in the emotional realm?

I think, like I said, being in touch with your emotions, those negative ones,

where did that come from and when you see where it got opened in any given day.

Again, you can go back at night or with a journal or with a friend and say, I, I

don't know why that makes me so anxious.

What do you think that is?

So it begins some self-reflection.

And so, , so, again, there's myriads of ways, but we can just begin with one step

of being willing to quiet ourselves down.

And again, even if it's just one, one afternoon a

week, it, doesn't have to be everything.

The whole point of the journey back to the foundations and tying

those in is that they're just one

step at a time.

Yeah.

No, that's so good.

And I, I so resonate with that.

Like just the next step.

Just one more step.

So what would you say though, to somebody that again, it, it's back to the

foundation of, you know, there was either major trauma done or maybe stuff they

don't even remember and they don't even know why they feel the way that they do.

Right?

These cracks are old, old, old cracks you know, deep And they don't know even how

to how to go there or how to touch that or maybe their view and their narrative

of God is when they really sit and look at

it, they're.

I don't believe that you're for me.

Um, and I don't believe God, that you're good and that you're faithful.

so how do we even begin to touch those places?

that's a great question and i.

think everything we're talking about here is that we're gonna begin to

all believe together that God is more than enough, first of all.

And secondly, we're building on this idea that God has called us to himself

and then to others and to each other.

So I think the idea of us being isolated and not really having great connections

is something we wanna think about.

If we don't have that connection, the first step I would do.

is, if I had, I didn't really understand, why I was feeling this

way or how to even begin to see it.

If you have any connection to any kind of insurance or a family member that might

help you, you know, I would suggest if it feels really overwhelming and you're in a

really deep place, I would say, you know, I would find a good Christian counselor

that you can, , that you can pay for in, in lieu of that, I would go to, my church

or my friends who go to church and I would begin to try to find the next best thing.

I think, and sometimes equally is what I tell people is, there are many,

many people out there who have wisdom.

are elders who, have done this a long time, who are on a sliding

scale and some will just meet with you, uh, just to pour into you more

like a mentor and a coach than they would be necessarily a counselor.

The second part I'd say is you don't have to have money to build a relationship.

And I would pick someone maybe a little bit older than you and, uh, through

referral or through someone you're watching and observing their life.

The last thing I would say, if for whatever reason.

None of those were really available to you.

The last thing I say, which is the only really thing I had for the, the particular

circumstances of my life is I, I just, I had all my eggs in the basket of God.

I, I was just kind of, Outta luck, so to speak.

I didn't have those options.

And so I can witness and say that sitting with God, it may be a little

longer, but I do believe that you can invite him in and tell him everything.

And, and I, I, I definitely believe he's counselor of all as we sit in

quiet and, and just take our story to him and, and these broken parts.

But I think any of.

and, and sometimes all three of those happening at the same time I think

can be the greatest benefit of all.

Otherwise, in the future, very soon, we'll have a few recommendations of a

book.

Um, but, you know, book is kind of my last

go-to because I really.

My desire for you, and I think God's desire for you is that you're actually

interfacing with human beings this is unto

relationship and your healing isn't, or your wholeness is not so

that you can feel better, but by God's design and his value system,

and it becomes our value system, is that he wants us to walk more

free fully whole in who he's created us to

be.

So that's where our joy and that's where our peace

is going to come.

Uh, that's, that's what I would say for today.

Yeah.

Oh, no, that's good.

That's, that's good.

Yeah..

I definitely know that for me, those kind of what we would even say is like

a trigger, like you mentioned, oh, if you wake up and you're like, I feel

fine, and then all of a sudden, two hours later, I'm like, why do I rage

And I think in that moment, and we'll talk about that I think even

in the, know, weeks, months to

come.

, in that

moment like pausing and

stopping and being like, whoa, wait a second.

what's going on on a deeper and then right.

Once we can

assess that, then I feel like sitting with the Lord and being like, okay, reveal

about the way that I view you Lord.

do I believe that you really are good and that you really are faithful and

you really are I, I shared this with you, mom, but kind of the picture I,

feel the Lord kind of gave me, even when as I

was processing this and as far as

like, Lord, do I believe that you're good and that you're for me,

, no matter what, because I do feel like so much.

we really

broke it down.

So much of our story and our narrative is, is based off

of a view at the end

of the day that it's me against the world.

I have to like, fight for my rights.

If I don't do it, nobody will, and that

God's kind

of out to get me, or, you know, a again, all the

things waiting for the shoe to drop.

But

it, it's this view

like it's kind of this skewed view of who we believe God is, and so I was kind of

thinking on that,

and processing that, and I feel like I kind of got this

picture of, um, of, I was, I

was sitting in this field, so it's

like a

field as as, as, far as you

can see from the right and

into the left.

It's just a giant, giant field.

And I feel like all of a sudden I was

like plopped in

the

middle of it and somebody said, okay, now look to your right.

And I looked to my

right, and again,

it's a field like as far as the eye

can see, you know, this beautiful

giant field, and there's a path and it's just like a clear linear

path.

and then they say, okay, now look to your left.

and

all of a sudden on my left, it's no

longer a field or it is, but it's

covered with these tall

ant hills.

And maybe the picture is

anthill

because I hate ants.

Like with all of my being so So I'm like, okay, it had

to be

ants and so it was like fire

anthill,

like huge, like there's a path, but it's literally

covered with fire.

Ant hills, just giant, giant, giant.

And in the picture, all of.

a sudden I imagined you mom, in front

of me and you, look at me and say,

I need you to go down

that path.

And I look at you and I'm

like, why would I

do that?

why would I go down that path with

giant ant Hills when I could go

this way?

And that path looks really happy and super nice and.

As far as I can tell, they both go to the same place, right?

Like I see maybe where the finish

line is, or what I perceive to be the finish line, and I see it

as they both lead the same place.

Like that doesn't make any sense.

why can't I go

down that path?

But I'm looking at you and you're looking at me and you're saying,

Mary, just trust

me.

I need you to go down that path.

And in kind of as I'm kind of processing this picture that I'm like kind of feeling

and like seeing in my mind, I'm just.

Okay.

what would I

do in that situation?

And I felt.

again, I am so insanely blessed to have you, mama, and even throughout all of

our life and all of the kind of pain and

somewhat dysfunction that happened throughout our life, I, I always felt

like I had you and that was such a gift.

Such a

gift.

But I do feel like it was also such an ability to be able to see, oh, there's

someone in my life that's for me,

Which is, again, such a gift that some people don't have.

But I, I was able to have that.

A lot of other

kind of things swirling around me.

I had you that I knew was for me.

So again, back to this picture, in that picture, when I was like, okay,

what would I do in that situation?

Well, I, I was thinking, I was like, well, I might try to

reason with her for a second.

Like, are you sure I can't?

But if she looked at me and said, no, you have to go down this path, even though you

probably will be bit up by ants and it's gonna hurt a lot, but do you trust me?

And I'm like, well, I think I would, because I mean, I, I know my mom loves

me a lot and I know that obviously

If she wants me to go down it and knows that I'm gonna be in pain, then surely

she must know something that I don't.

Surely she must know some information that I don't know because I know that

my mom is for me and I know that she only wants what's best for me and

she would never want me to be hurt.

So if for some reason she is allowing me to be hurt on this other

path, she must know something I.

And so with that kind of picture that I felt like I got, I, I so felt like the

Lord saying like that is the breakdown that people, that breaks down, that we

don't view God is for us and is good.

we can just like, extrapolate that in so many different ways, right?

Of like, you know, this path or this we're praying for this but this didn't

happen and all the things and it's like, God, , why didn't you do this thing?

Or like, this doesn't make sense.

but if I so knew and I so believed God was looking at me in the

face and saying, do you trust me?

Like I know it doesn't make any sense.

I know it looks like you can go down this path and this one be

just fine, but do you trust me?

And I think like that breaking down to be like, Maybe I don't, and being

okay with sitting in that place and just admitting that and then asking the

Lord to begin to not only reveal maybe why you don't trust him, but how can

you begin to shore up that and again, I think that the Lord has to be the

one to do that, but I think that just sitting with him on that is definitely

a good first, first place to start.

yeah.

Absolutely.

I, mean, who God is really coming

to

believe.

and looking at your

paradigms of what you believe about God,

what you believe about yourself, and what you believe he thinks

about you and believes about you.

These are the very core things that are completely life-changing

and starting with his nature.

Is he good or is he

not?

Is he trustworthy or is he not?

I would say that these are key

things, uh, that that we would behold that could change us by

beholding these.

yeah.

yeah.

And I know

Next week we're gonna kind of jump into.

The next kind of tier of that pyramid or The

next

level, of that house.

Again,

like we

said, they're all connected.

you know, our emotions begin to reveal to us what's happening on a

what's really there.

so, yeah, so they're all just so

connected.

So anyways, kind of

jumping in a little bit to that and again, how our

stories and how our narratives, come into play.

not

even come into play.

They're everything, That's how we view the world and, how we

view every situation that we.

I agree.

And, we just, , so,, appreciate, you guys listening out there because we know

that, you know, it's a little tricky and

it's not always super linear.

We're talking about complex things.

Uh, but I would say, you know, just to, tell you, We are so for you,

we've both already started praying for you and, we know that this is

complicated and it's hard and it's

messy.

But I think as we go forward, you're gonna be able to,, join us.

In this journey in a way that's you're gonna find more

joyful than you expected, and that there's hope along the way.

And part of that hope

is us encouraging each other.

So we wanna end by just encouraging you guys and saying, that we're all

together in this and,, we believe that God is gonna give you the bridges that

you need to more wholeness and more freedom, uh, and more joy and more peace.

And we, I just wanna end with a blessing over all of you listening today.

That God is for you and we're

for you.

And we know that that can change your life.