Shownotes
What if the patterns in your life aren’t random—but quietly repeating something unseen? On the Soul Mirror podcast, hosted by Shreya, this episode with August Rivers explores why we keep reliving the same emotional loops and how true self-awareness begins.
This conversation is for anyone feeling stuck in repeated reactions, relationships, or inner conflicts. You’ll walk away understanding the difference between knowing yourself and actually living that awareness—and how small, honest shifts can gently break cycles without shame.
About the Guest:
August Rivers is a functional health and wellness educator who blends healing philosophy with grounded resilience, helping people understand patterns and reconnect with themselves.
Episode Chapter:
00:00 Opening reflection on life patterns
03:10 What genuine self-awareness really means
07:20 Misconceptions about “being self-aware”
11:40 Why we stay stuck in loops
16:30 Childhood roots of repeating patterns
21:15 Intuition vs survival response
26:40 Breaking loops with small shifts
Key Takeaways:
- Self-awareness is not knowledge—it’s lived action
- Loops often begin as protection, not failure
- Intuition feels calm; patterns feel urgent
- Change happens through small, consistent shifts
- Awareness without compassion keeps the loop alive
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Transcripts
00:00:08 Shreya: Welcome to the Soul Mirror podcast, a space where we look gently but honestly at the patterns that shape who we are. I'm your host, Shreya, and today I'm joined by August Rivers, a functional health and wellness educator whose work weaves together healing philosophy and lived resilience in a deeply grounded way. In this conversation, we are exploring genuine self-awareness, but looping really is and how we begin to notice the patterns we keep living before they keep choosing for us. August, I am really glad you are here. Like, it's really an honor for me to have you.
00:00:49 August Rivers: Thank you so much. I'm excited to be here with you.
00:00:51 Shreya: Thank you so much. And August to begin gently when you hear the phrase genuine self-awareness, what does it mean to you now? Especially after all the layers of life you had to move through?
00:01:09 August Rivers: You know, I think there is such we go through these fads in life and everyone jumps on the bandwagon and, you know, says like, I'm self-aware, I'm conscious. I'm all these different things. The woke, you know, spiritual community. And the reality is that so many people are still missing the piece of what self-awareness really means. And that means diving into yourself at the deepest core possible, right? Knowing your actions and the the outcomes that they're causing and your thought processes and where they stem from and not pointing fingers at other people. It doesn't matter if they're friends or family or, you know, political leaders. Really being able to hone in on yourself and understand where every single action that you are living is coming from and why you are doing them and why they continue to repeat patterns, right? You really want to be able to dive into yourself to a to the core of knowing yourself better than anyone else could ever know you. And unfortunately, that's not the case. We, we tend to walk around in a society where we can see people so much more clearly than they can see themselves, because they're portraying a version of them that isn't clean. It's not clear, it's not pure. And unfortunately, they're unable to tap into themselves to that level. And that, to me is genuine. Self-Awareness is being able to repeat back to someone. Yes, I see what you're saying about myself, and I've been trying to figure out like what that means, why am I doing this? Why do I keep, uh, recreating the scenario in my life? Or why do I keep dating the same type of people, you know, really asking why and asking bigger questions about yourself instead of projecting those patterns onto an external factor.
00:03:00 Shreya: That's really great. Thank you for explaining this so, so beautifully for my listeners. And, uh, that brings up something important right away. I think a lot of people believe self-awareness simply means thinking deeply about yourself or being someone who can explain their behavior well, but those are not always the same thing. So I am really curious, like, what do you feel is the biggest misconception people have about self-awareness.
00:03:33 August Rivers: I think that I think a lot of people think that they're self-aware just because, like you just said, because they are asking questions. But you have to implement those things that you are learning about yourself into your daily life. So many people take knowledge from books, from podcasts, from videos, you know, all this self-help guru stuff that we have in this life. A lot of people read about this stuff and they, they learn more about themselves, but they never actually implement it into their daily lives. So they have all this wisdom, and yet they continue living their lives as though they've never heard, heard of this stuff before. Right. With our parents and generations before us, it made sense that they weren't able to implement a lot of different techniques because they didn't have access to all of the technology that we do. Now, they don't have, you know, immediate access to therapy or, you know, all of these different books and podcasts. So it made sense that they were not integrating different modalities into their lives. But we have it at our fingertips and people read it and read it and absorb all this information, but yet they never put it to practice. And that is one of one of the biggest misconceptions about the self-awareness community.
00:04:52 Shreya: Yeah, I think that difference is everything, because it is one thing to describe your wound after the fact and another to recognize it while it is asking to lead you. I think that feels like a very powerful place to begin because it shifts self-awareness from performance into presence.
00:05:16 August Rivers: Exactly.
00:05:18 Shreya: And when someone is very articulate about themselves but still feels stuck in the same loop. What is usually missing?
00:05:30 August Rivers: You know, so it's really funny because I was actually just thinking about looping before you and I jumped on this call. And again, it really comes down to the action piece where people fall into this comfort space, right? And it's also a neurological program that we fall into. So there's a lot of different factors that most people are playing with. It's the comfort factor of, oh, but I have a partner or I have, you know, children. I have all these different things. So it would be too much for me to implement all these different practices. So I can't do it. So excuses, you know, excuses is number one. But then we also have the fact that our neurological system literally programs the how do I explain this to you? So we have a programming system. When something says, hey, this is a repeat Pattern. Why even try? Why even put energy into it, right? We have that safety system that comes online after we have either put so much time and energy into a specific situation, or we've tried to become someone different and we're not seeing results. Our neurological system says, okay, there's no reason to continue doing this because it's continuing the same pattern. And so then we end up inside of another loop. And so it's just kind of this vicious cycle of you don't see return. Your neurological programming says, hey, this isn't worth it. It's the same thing that we've seen before. And then, so then you stop doing these things, and then you go back through the circle again with something else. And so I really think it comes down to excuses for some people who still have the desire and passion to grow and change. And also for the people who are trying and really do want to make big changes in their lives, their neurological system is basically shutting them down. And so they need to step through it with micro shifts, right? Really taking smaller steps to become something different and seeing the wins at all of those small intersections. Because when we try to jump too fast, we end up back in that same loop because we're going to expect bigger results and they're not going to come yet. So we need to take it smaller. So I think a lot of people really just need to, one, get rid of their excuses and two, make smaller shifts as they're progressing.
00:07:55 Shreya: I think that that that is beautifully explained. And, uh, let's, let's stay with that for a moment because looping really starts on the surface. Uh, it usually has roots, like in your experience, uh, where do these loops tend to come from?
00:08:14 August Rivers: I mean, looping starts very early in life, in my opinion. And depending on how you were raised and the things that you had to overcome those patterns, start locking in around the age of seven or eight, right? So for myself, I was constantly sick as a child. I was watching a lot of my family members die. There was a lot of, you know, my dad was an alcoholic, all these different things where my little body was already taking on so much stress. And so I started looping a fear, uh, everyone's going to die, you know, I'm always going to be sick, all of these different programs. And so I started looping those very young and they played through into my twenties, into my thirties. And I really had to realize that with loops, if you're going to break them, you have to do it so slowly when it's a lifelong loop. But then as we start aging, you know, even in our twenties, we begin to see different loops because we start having romantic connections, right? And when romantic connections come in, depending on how your first one was. It could create a loop of really beautiful opportunities, or it could create a loop of meeting the same people who do the same thing on repeat. And then we blame them for the problems instead of realizing like, well, why am I attracting this though? What am I doing that is still attracting this person? Because clearly there's something about this dynamic that I feel comfortable with, right? And so we have to learn about the comforts. And so looping starts when you step into something that feels stressful or it created a lot of chaos in your life or something really traumatic, those loops will perpetuate if you do not break the cycle. And so many people, they just allow themselves to stay in that victimization of the loop. And instead of realizing like, okay, well, what could I do differently? You know, and starting a, taking themselves out of out of the loop completely and starting a new trajectory, they allow themselves to continue the loop, continue the loop, and yes, eventually you're eventually you're going to get outside of the loop enough to realize like, oh, I did make changes. And yes, I am still seeing a little bit of the pattern, but there is a drastic difference in how it's happening and how extreme it's happening. Right? And so then you keep progressing instead of just falling back into that same pattern.
00:10:48 Shreya: I think there is something so striking in that like the loop is not random. It's often protective. Uh, even if it's painful, like it began as a way to survive something and later keeps repeating long after the original moment is gone.
00:11:06 August Rivers: Yes.
00:11:09 Shreya: And also, how can someone begin to tell the difference between intuition guiding them and an old survival pattern quietly running the show?
00:11:20 August Rivers: So in my personal experience, intuition is always softer and clear. It comes through with a sense of knowing. Like just this soft knowing in your body. It's not this heavy or anxiety ridden feeling. It is a sense of peace. Even if your intuition is pointing you towards something that might not be the best thing. Like if there is an illness or something, you know, negative, I say negative with quotes is about to happen. The intuition is still really calm and it sets you up to know you're going to be okay regardless, right? But if something is the old pattern, it's almost like an alert saying fire, fire, like, hey, ring the bell. There's there's a fire happening. And that's because it's constantly on alert and it's expecting you to need to be on alert. And so those are the times when I think when people have knee jerk reactions, which I still do from time to time. I will be in heated conversations and I will have this desire to react because as a little girl, I was very much like on reaction mode and I had to, I had to be in that fight or flight mentality the majority of my life. And so even for myself, when those knee jerk reactions come up, I had to stop myself and realize, hey, this isn't intuition telling me to run. It's not telling me to fight. This is a reaction that's happening and saying, hey, like you're in trouble, get out of there. And I have to sit with it and be like, no, this isn't this isn't a fight or flight mentality. Everything's okay. It's just a conversation. They're not attacking me and I have to breathe through it, right? You have to really bring yourself back down to center and realize this is not your intuition. This is an alarm bell going off. And those two matter when you can come, when you're coming from intuition first off, and you're in a conversation and your intuition is telling you something, it's going to be subtle and it's just going to say, hey, you know what? Like there's something weird about this conversation. How can we leave it right instead of run? Um, and I think those subtle differences, it's so important to learn those and you have to really sit with yourself by yourself in silence in order to learn the differences. Otherwise, when you have external factors who are always blocking those signals, you're never going to learn what your intuition actually feels like.
00:13:52 Shreya: Yeah. And I think, uh, that's where this becomes very human like because, uh, looping is not just an abstract idea. It, it shows up in real relationships, real choices, real warnings, real reactions. So what tends to happen in everyday life when someone is stuck in a loop without realizing it?
00:14:13 August Rivers: Oh, I mean, most people are living in a loop without realizing it. That's why we have such a robotic world, right? Everyone's just kind of there on autopilot and they're, they're not thinking for themselves. They're, you know, following the media mentality. They're believing all the things that they read and what they see. And they just kind of follow each other and they're living literally in this auto loop that they've created for themselves. And so few people actually stop and say, wait a second, who am I following? What am I following? Instead of saying, oh, wait a second, do I really believe this? And what world do I actually want to create for myself? Because the world you create for yourself is going to be the world that exists to you, right? And so the majority of people are just doing their day to day. They're driving to work, they're doing the same thing every day. You know, they're, they're not asking the bigger questions of what do they want in life. And even when people are able to get to that level and think like, okay, well, maybe I don't like this loop that I'm living in. They still follow a lot of other loops, like, okay, well, these people are doing X, Y, Z, so maybe we should try that, right? And one of my favorite quotes is, uh, it's in regards to taking two different paths, right? Like there is a path in the wood and I took the one less traveled and the I, this is like a physical reality as well. When I go hiking, if I see big groups of people going off one direction, I always go the other direction. I don't want to be part of that mentality packed. And it's not because I'm trying to be different. It's because I desire that solitude enough to know I want to feel myself. I want to be in nature. And that is a metaphorical turn as well with my internal reality. And what I see externally is that you have to be willing to step off the path that everyone else is taking, in order to hear yourself enough, in order to know yourself enough. And I just The majority, ninety percent plus people are in a worldwide loop that they created together. It's just one big connected loop and they're feeding each other off of it.
00:16:26 Shreya: I think that's really a very nice quote that you mentioned. And like, so once someone notices the loop, that awareness can be tender also like it can feel overwhelming. So how do you encourage people to meet that moment without shaming themselves?
00:16:46 August Rivers: You know, I think the biggest part of that is to know that it is okay that you're sharing yourself. That's part of the process. Right. So the first part is we do shame ourselves. We are our own worst critic most of the time. And so part of that is, hey, I do recognize that I'm shaming myself for not living a way that feels better. That right there is an awareness of stepping outside of the loop. That doesn't mean you're taking a step out of that at that point. But being aware of the fact that you're telling yourself that is one of the first steps of self-awareness, right? It's really acknowledging like, oh, I see that I'm, I'm feeling a little bit guilty or I'm embarrassed by doing certain things that I know are affecting me in a negative way. That right there, that awareness is where the next step starts, right? Because then you become more gentle on yourself and you can be like, oh, wait a second, it's okay, because I've been part of a loop that society has created for, you know, hundreds of years. This is just what we've done. And it's something that I can step outside of. I can take the next step. So I don't need to feel guilty about this. And that's where we learn like, okay, so I'm shaming myself. That's okay. Like I get it. It makes sense why I would be doing that now. What's the next step? Right. So I think it's just starting at the basis realizing that you are having thoughts about the loop first off, and then second, that it's okay that you are shaming yourself and that is just part of the growth process.
00:18:21 Shreya: I really love that reframe, not what is wrong with me, but what is this trying to show me? I think that alone feels like a doorway into a different relationship with ourselves.
00:18:35 August Rivers: Yes.
00:18:37 Shreya: And I think that is important because change is rarely linear. Even when, uh, someone becomes more aware, old patterns can still come back, especially under stress. So how do you make sense of setbacks without seeing them as a failure?
00:18:55 August Rivers: I think it's that's where it's important to remember the power of our neurological system and how everything is wired, right. And just because we are reprogramming and the older you get, the more difficult it is to reprogram. I'm not going to say it's impossible because that is not the case. But we are always going to have those old programs wired, right. So we might be triggered by something that we haven't dealt with for ten, fifteen years. And all of a sudden here we are like, you might be in a relationship when you haven't been in one in fifteen plus years, and all of a sudden those old programs are being triggered because you haven't had to deal with that situation in a long time. Right? And so I think it's just like remembering that just because you're becoming more self-aware does not mean that all of those neuro neurological programs are going to disappear. They are there with you, and we just need to learn to operate with them and to see them when they show up to be like, okay, I see this happening and be witness to it, not a participant, but learn to witness those Neurological systems coming through. When you are in a new situation or when something's coming up that you haven't had to deal with. To stop and to actually allow yourself to stop in the moment and breathe and find your breath. Because breath is really what can help reset your nervous system so quickly. And to acknowledge, oh, wait a second, I see where this is stemming from. This is part of my old programming and it makes sense. Like it makes sense why I would be feeling or thinking this way, but it doesn't actually have effect in my new reality. And to really sit through that and to allow yourself the space to have those come up because it's going to happen. And instead of beating yourself up over it, you can become friends with it. And eventually you kind of learn to laugh at them a little bit in the context of, oh my gosh, like, I totally understand why this person would have reacted this way twenty years ago. It makes sense, but it no longer does. and then you. It loses its charge because you're no longer giving it the weight that it used to have on you. And so that's how they really start fading in a, in a bigger capacity.
00:21:21 Shreya: I think that that plants deeply. Like the goal is not to be like, never be triggered again. The goal is to become less abandoned by ourselves when we are like that shift alone changes the whole journey.
00:21:36 August Rivers: It does.
00:21:39 Shreya: And this is truly a very amazing conversation with you. I think this is really helpful for many of my listeners. And if there is one insight I'm taking from this conversation is that genuine self-awareness begins when we stop just explaining our patterns and start meeting them with honesty, compassion, and the courage to choose differently. And if after this, my listeners want to connect with you and want to know more about you. About your work. Then what's the best place to find you?
00:22:11 August Rivers: You know, so right now, YouTube is going to be the best place. I'm finally getting back on there. I haven't been podcasting or writing or YouTubing and many in a few years. And so I'm starting to do a lot more on YouTube. And so that's going to be the best place to find me. And that is living with August, um, on YouTube. And I think that's going to be the best bet unless you happen to be in Colorado and you're listening, then you can go to my website for real estate.
00:22:38 Shreya: Yes. And I will make sure to attach all these details and links below so that the listeners can find them easily and get in touch with you and can know more about you and your work. And for my listeners, thank you for being here with us today on the Soul Mirror. This conversation starts something in you. Maybe that is your invitation to pause and notice what has been repeating beneath the surface. Not to judge, not to rush past it. Just to witness it with a little more honesty and a little more care. Until next time, stay gentle with yourself and keep listening to what your inner life is trying to reveal. And do not forget to hit the follow button. Subscribe and feel free to share your thoughts because our ears deserve premium content. Thank you.
