Mari and Trey chat about the significance of integrating prayer into relationships, and especially marriages. They discuss their personal experiences with prayer during different stages of their relationship and offer practical advice on how to start praying together, from simple blessings over meals to more intimate intercessory prayer. The episode emphasizes the importance of inviting God into one's relationship and provides actionable steps for couples to grow spiritually together.
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Mentioned in this episode:
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Hey, I'm your host, Mari Wagner,
and you're listening to the ever be
2
:podcast where faith meets lifestyle.
3
:I'm so excited you're here, whether you're
a new listener or a longtime follower,
4
:I know there's something here for you.
5
:Pull up a chair and listen in for
insightful real life conversations
6
:and actionable steps on how to claim
the full life God created you for.
7
:If you're a woman desiring to live
a Christ centered life in today's
8
:modern world, then this is for you.
9
:Welcome to Ever Be.
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:mari---trey_1_08-18-2024_070753:
Welcome back, everybody.
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:And welcome back, Trey.
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:Thank you.
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:Good to be here.
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:As always.
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:Back for another episode.
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:Um, today we're going to be
chatting about how to incorporate
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:faith into your relationship as
a couple, specifically prayer.
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:We feel that this has been A really like
integral part of our faith relationship
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:as a married couple throughout the years.
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:And even as, um, an engaged couple,
and we'll talk a little bit about like
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:incorporating it into your dating.
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:If you're not engaged,
you're married yet either.
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:Um, and I think the more.
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:We, I don't know, just live life the
more we realize this isn't like a
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:normal thing that a lot of couples do,
or it's something that maybe people
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:want to do, but it's kind of foreign
or it's a little bit weird for people.
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:Like it's a little awkward to kind
of get, get started and get into it.
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:Um, so.
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:And we feel like it's so important to
learn how to pray with your spouse.
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:Yeah.
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:I mean, you don't just feel like it
that's, it is extremely important
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:to pray with your spouse and to have
prayer be an integral part of your
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:relationship, whether you're dating or
married, um, those relationships will
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:look different, but prayer definitely
needs to be a foundational part of.
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:Right.
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:And I mean, if we go back to our goal
of having a God centered marriage,
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:I mean, if you think of like, how
do you have a Christ centered life?
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:I mean, you have to root yourself
in prayer and your relationship
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:with God is developed through
intentional daily prayer.
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:And so in a similar way to really have
a God centered marriage, to really
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:have your marriage be rooted in God.
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:You know what the Holy Spirit's calling
you to do and the way the Lord wants you
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:to live out a good and Holy marriage.
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:You have to know the Lord
together as a couple and you
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:have to invite the Lord into your
relationship via prayer as a couple.
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:So that's what we're
going to get into today.
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:And I'm excited.
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:Let's get started.
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:Okay.
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:We'll start off in a prayer.
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:In the Father, in the
Son, in the Holy Spirit.
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:Amen.
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:I'm Holy Spirit.
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:Heavenly Father, we give you
praise and thanks this morning.
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:We thank you for.
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:Always that you love us,
always that you bless us.
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:Thank you for my marriage with Mari.
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:Thank you for our families
and for our health.
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:Thank you for this podcast and the ways
that you are using Mari and I to spread
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:your love and to lead people to you.
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:We pray that.
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:The words on this, our words on
this podcast today will be your
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:words that you'll inspire us,
that you'll send your Holy spirit
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:into our hearts to fill our minds.
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:I would pray for protection, uh, over
the equipment and the technology today.
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:Uh, that'll be a smooth recording
and that, uh, we pray for all
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:the listeners that there'll be
blessed by this podcast and that.
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:Uh, you'll give them the grace to
integrate prayer into their marriage
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:and their relationships and they marry.
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:We trust all this to you.
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:In Jesus name.
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:We pray.
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:Thanks babe.
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:Yeah.
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:Okay.
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:Where are we starting?
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:I think we start with
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:before you can begin to pray as a
couple, you have to be praying yourself.
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:Uh, that is primary.
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:Uh, and so if you're not
praying, you're not praying.
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:And you don't have your own individual
relationship with God and you're
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:not having daily prayer yourself.
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:I start there.
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:Uh, you've recorded a
podcast or two on prayer.
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:I know.
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:Yeah.
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:At least two.
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:I know.
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:I know there's one full one that like
breaks down, I think more of like the
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:catechesis of theology on like the
importance of prayer and what prayer is.
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:And then I think one of the more
recent ones was literally just like
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:breakdown ways to have a prayer routine
consistently, like minute by minute.
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:Very practical.
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:Yeah.
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:So go listen to those.
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:Go listen to those.
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:But that's first.
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:If you're not praying
yourself, start there.
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:Yeah.
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:It's most important.
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:Yeah.
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:And when we're talking about prayer, if
you haven't heard those other episodes,
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:we're talking about like sustained
time in silence with God and either
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:that's you literally being silent and
allowing for God to speak into your
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:life or you spending time in quiet,
personal prayer, journaling, reading
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:scripture, speaking to God on your own,
like mental prayer, um, that's truly.
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:What prayer looks like.
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:That's truly how you
develop that relationship.
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:So as Catholics, we're so used to those
rope prayers, which are good and beautiful
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:and still should be prayed, but just
praying a hail Mary or in our father,
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:isn't the extent that your prayer can go.
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:And isn't the extent that your
relationship with the father can go.
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:So just wanted to make that note.
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:Yeah.
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:And praying as you fall asleep
or thinking about God while you
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:drive is good, but it's not.
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:It's not, it's not, you're
still missing the point there.
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:It's not, it shouldn't be the
extent of your prayer life.
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:Yeah.
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:Um, somebody told us last night
that, uh, God, God doesn't
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:think of you as an afterthought.
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:You shouldn't think of
God as an afterthought.
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:So don't have God as the afterthought
of Um, praying in the car, like, Oh,
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:like a toss up prayer before you go to
sleep, make intentional time for him.
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:So start there.
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:Yeah.
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:And my, my challenge here
specifically, I think we hear a lot.
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:I mean, we've said it ourselves, we've
fallen into this as well, but like, it's
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:very common to hear people say, yeah,
my faith is my number one priority.
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:It's like the, the, the most important
thing in my life to me is my faith.
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:But if you're not praying.
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:How is that really true?
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:That's my question, right?
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:If you're not actually, if you don't
actually have a committed daily prayer
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:life or striving for one, right?
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:If you're not striving for one and
striving to know Jesus truly in a personal
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:relationship, is that really true?
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:Is your faith, is Jesus, is
your relationship with Jesus
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:really number one in your life?
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:Because we make time for the
things that we find important.
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:So we find time to scroll on our phones.
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:We find time to work.
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:We find time to go out with
friends, you know, travel,
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:whatever it is you find important.
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:And so I just want to challenge you
there and feel like if, if you feel
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:that way in your life, if you've
said that in your life, you know,
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:How is that actually playing out?
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:Because I think that's the hardest part
is actually recognizing like, what does it
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:look like to put Jesus first in my life?
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:And I would, I would say it
starts with daily prayer.
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:Absolutely.
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:And don't get us wrong.
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:Like it's hard and it's very challenging
and we fail all the time, but we're always
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:on the struggle bus with prayer, but
we're always trying to incorporate it.
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:Yeah.
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:Yeah.
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:Absolutely.
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:Yeah.
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:It's all about getting back up.
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:So praying as a couple.
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:Okay.
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:So I think let's just talk a little
bit about like how we even started
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:incorporating into our life, like
how it actually just naturally
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:incorporated into our relationship.
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:Do it.
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:Okay.
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:So when we.
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:We're dating.
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:There was the summer kind of in
those first few months of our dating
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:relationship where we both went and
did internships or mission type,
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:uh, like work for that summer.
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:You were at life team for
the summer in Georgia.
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:And I was doing an internship with focus
here out in Colorado for the summer.
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:And that was kind of our
first real exposure to this
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:like amazing Catholic world.
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:And, you know, Kind of the first time we
started to live, like, vibrant Catholic
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:lives, like, Christ centered lives.
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:We didn't really know what
that looked like before then.
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:And one thing that we both experienced
was prayer with other people.
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:At least, I don't think I'd
ever experienced that before.
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:Like At least not to the extent.
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:I don't know if I'd ever really
had anybody Pray for me like that.
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:Like maybe in youth group, the leader
would like pray us out or pray us in,
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:but that summer, I mean, I not only
experienced like Bible study with other
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:people, like talking about scripture with
other people, but at the same time, um,
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:people also offering to like, pray over
me and like pray for specific intentions
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:and do like intercessory prayer.
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:And so that was a really cool experience
because the Holy Spirit was a.
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:Part of the Trinity that I
was very unfamiliar with.
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:I think, um, I think I always kind
of had a relationship with the
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:father and then was kind of working
on my relationship with Jesus.
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:And the Holy Spirit was just kind of this,
like, elusive thing that was happening.
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:And I think that's the
case for a lot of people.
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:And so people were like, let's invite
the Holy Spirit into our prayer.
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:Like, let's pray intercessory prayer.
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:And, um, I think it was really good
to kind of have that experience
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:apart from each other, because it
kind of normalized it a little bit.
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:Yeah, and I, and I mean, like, we
learned how to do it on our own first.
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:Yeah, yeah, exactly.
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:Cause I think it's, you can
definitely learn together and that's
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:beautiful, but I think it helps to.
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:That was just our experience.
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:Yeah, that was our experience.
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:It's like, we learned how
to pray individually and we
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:were able to do it together.
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:Yeah, and so then when we came back to
campus after that summer, I mean, we
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:were talking about all these experiences
all throughout the summer together.
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:And then when we came back to campus, um,
I think it was our mentor friend, Jeremy,
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:or either it was just us reflecting from
the summer who encouraged us to like.
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:Continue to pray with each other.
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:Um, well, at that point we were already
discerning engagement and that's something
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:like as your relationship is progressing,
it's more and more important to
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:incorporate prayer into your relationship.
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:And so, yeah, we were encouraged by
mentors to make sure that prayer was a
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:foundational aspect of our relationship.
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:And so then we kind of
just started trying.
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:Yeah.
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:So what did that look like?
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:Well, I remember us doing two things.
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:I remember us praying with scripture.
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:I remember that like, I think it was
like every other Thursday morning
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:there was a stretch where you would
come over to my house and we would
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:pick a chapter in the gospels.
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:What?
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:That's great.
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:I don't remember that.
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:You don't remember that?
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:I remember praying with
scripture together.
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:I don't remember that.
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:It was every other Thursday.
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:After this summer or that one summer,
like we were praying scripture before
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:this because we were both in that like.
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:Gospels class where we like our
homework was to pray scripture.
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:So that was a unique part of our
relationship where we were like
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:reading scripture together from like
day one before we were even dating.
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:But then after the summer, I know
that we were like intentional
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:about praying it together.
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:And so I remember it was like Thursday
mornings, you would come over and
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:I'm not saying we did this for like
months on end, but like there were
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:several times on Thursday mornings
where you would come over and we
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:would like pray with scripture.
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:I love that you know,
because it's Thursdays.
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:Feel like it was a Thursday.
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:That's great.
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:Um, Hey, women with the berries gatherers.
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:So like we have good memories,
you know, it was, it was real.
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:And, and so I think like one of us
would open in prayer and just like,
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:ask like God to be present and to
like speak to us through his word.
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:We would pick a piece of scripture,
kind of like chat about it,
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:pray with it and then close out.
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:And then there were also times when.
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:One of us felt like we needed, like,
particular prayer intentions to
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:be prayed over that then we would
pray with each other for, um, I'm
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:just trying to think of examples.
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:Um, if we were starting a big decision,
or if we were feeling really stressed
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:or anxious about something, or if there
was just something going on in our
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:lives that we were just struggling with.
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:Yeah.
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:Yeah.
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:And since we weren't discerning
engagement, I remember praying
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:us us praying about that a lot.
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:Like maybe after a date night or
something, we'd be just in the car and
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:be like, okay, like, let's just pray.
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:And you just pray.
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:Pray in the car for like God's
discernment to be clear for our
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:discernment to be clear and God's
will to be clear and Just what yeah,
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:whatever was going on in our lives Yeah,
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:and I think that at first it was
like maybe a little bit awkward at
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:times Like when we were first getting
into it like it wasn't like Boom.
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:You know how to do this.
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:And it's like fireworks and
the Holy Spirit's just flowing.
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:Like, I feel like, and there's kind
of awkward at first learning and
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:just kind of, yeah, that's what
I would describe it as awkward.
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:So let's talk about
like, why is it awkward?
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:Right?
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:Because that's just a true fact.
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:And you hear that a lot from people that
like, probably the number one thing that
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:prevents couples from praying is, It's
either they don't know how or they're
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:just not really comfortable doing it.
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:They feel awkward.
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:They feel like I'm not doing it right
or I don't know how to initiate it or
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:I feel like nervous that I don't know,
like my spouse is gonna not want to
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:do it with me or judge the way I say
things or like maybe you just like
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:don't even know how to say things.
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:You kind of get stage fright
when you're on the spot, right?
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:So, uh, that's how you feel.
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:I think everybody has felt that.
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:Yeah.
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:You're not alone.
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:And I think that like, it's
important to point that out because
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:I remember this mentor that we were
talking about that like kind of
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:encouraged us to incorporate prayer.
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:He would tell us prayer
is more intimate than sex.
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:And so like, if you can't pray together,
like, how are you coming together?
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:In the sacrament of marriage,
like this is the most intimate
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:form of your relationship.
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:And so I think there is something
about it being awkward that shows
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:like there's a sacredness to it.
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:There's, um, you're burying
your souls to each other.
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:Exactly.
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:Like you're burying your
souls to each other.
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:So yeah, there's a level of intimacy
that happens when you pray together.
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:Yeah.
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:So it's okay if it feels weird and
it's okay if it feels like not normal
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:or awkward, like that's normal, but
I promise you the more you do it,
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:the more comfortable you'll feel.
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:It's just like learning any new skill.
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:It's not going to feel natural at first.
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:You're going to have some learning
pains, but it's important.
310
:And so if you stick with it,
it will become more natural.
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:So.
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:What are ways, like the easy, natural ways
to incorporate prayer into a relationship?
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:Yeah.
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:Should we just start with practicals?
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:Like, and let's just start with like easy
to more advanced, if you will, you know?
316
:And so we'll start off with the really
basic ones that you can, if this is
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:something that's totally new to you,
or maybe you've tried to incorporate
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:it into your relationship and your
significant other or your spouse is like.
319
:Pretty against it or like nervous
about it or not open to it.
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:I think these easy stepping stone
practical tips will like help you kind
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:of like slowly get into it because
you can do this because you can do it.
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:So number one would be blessing
the meal, like praying over
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:your food before you eat.
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:That's something that.
325
:A lot of Catholics, most Catholics,
most Christians know how to do even
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:just like, if you've never prayed
it out loud yourself, even just
327
:from the standpoint of like, you
know, what's supposed to be said.
328
:Thank you for this food.
329
:Thank you for my family.
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:Like please bless this food, Lord.
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:Right.
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:Yeah.
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:Like you don't, there is
the bless us at Lord prayer.
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:Yeah.
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:You're welcome to use that.
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:And pray out loud with each other.
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:Don't just say it in your head, but you
don't have to, like that is not required.
338
:You can literally say whatever
you want, like food for those
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:who don't have any, whatever.
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:And so, and there's something so impactful
about having the man lead in this aspect.
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:And so this is a great practical way for.
342
:Him to be start getting comfortable.
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:I think like comfortable leading
and initiating it himself.
344
:Yeah.
345
:And so just like encouraging him to
be the one to pray and Thanksgiving
346
:and bless the food in his own words.
347
:Yeah.
348
:Yeah.
349
:You can, yeah, definitely start
with the, bless us a Lord prayer
350
:if you want, but you could graduate
into just praying out loud.
351
:Just like, thank you for this food
pray that it nurtures our body.
352
:We pray for those who go without today.
353
:I think for all of our blessings, amen.
354
:Amen.
355
:Exactly.
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:And as women, as wives, like be
encouraging of that, be supportive.
357
:Don't be critical about it.
358
:Don't be like, Oh, like you
should say this in your prayer.
359
:You shouldn't say it that way.
360
:You know, like, just like be loving
and encouraging and thank him for
361
:leading in that prayer and slowly.
362
:You'll build him up to have that
confidence to lead you both in
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:prayer and kind of bigger ways.
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:Yeah.
365
:It's a great stepping stone to be
comfortable praying on your own,
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:like with free prayers as opposed
to just reciting the road prayers.
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:Yeah.
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:I think that's the other reason.
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:And we've touched on a little
bit why people feel a little bit
370
:uncomfortable is like, you A lot of
times you can be self conscious about
371
:like how you're praying out loud.
372
:And if you're saying the right words
or beautiful words or not, and the
373
:reality is like, you can't pray wrong.
374
:Yeah.
375
:You can't pray wrong.
376
:You really can't pray wrong.
377
:And whether you are like super poetic
in your prayer or super basic in
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:your prayer, it has the same effect.
379
:The Lord loves it all.
380
:It's not like one prayer is more
powerful or better than the other.
381
:So don't get caught up in that.
382
:And Just talk as if you're
talking to somebody else.
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:Just like, don't get caught up in like
fancy language when you're praying.
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:Okay.
385
:Another example of times in your life
when you can just incorporate prayer very
386
:naturally is we do it when we travel.
387
:So anytime we're on a plane and a plane
is taking off, we'll just lean over
388
:to each other and just pray out loud.
389
:That's, we just free pray.
390
:We usually alternate.
391
:Yeah.
392
:We'll just take turns.
393
:But then I encourage you, especially
at the beginning to initiate it.
394
:Even if you don't, aren't the one that's
saying the it's like, Lean over to your
395
:wife or your girlfriend, fiance, and
say like, Hey, can you pray, like, at
396
:least be the one to initiate it and then
just pray like for like, like, Lord,
397
:we pray that you keep us safe on these
travels that you pray for the pilot that
398
:he'll be able to fly the plane safely.
399
:It's great for all those other
people that are traveling.
400
:Like, thank you for the
opportunity to be on this trip.
401
:That's it.
402
:Yeah.
403
:Literally take 10 seconds.
404
:Um, you can do it for
when you're on the plane.
405
:You can do it when you're
going on road trips, you do
406
:it anytime you get in the car.
407
:Uh, but those are just kind of like, we
do it anytime we go on a road trip, just
408
:like bless this trip, bless the road,
bless our car and the vehicles around us.
409
:Thank you for giving us
this opportunity to travel.
410
:Yeah, those are very easy
ways to with meals and with.
411
:Traveling that's the Mari likes
to call it habit stacking.
412
:Other people have called it that as well,
where you're just incorporating something
413
:into something you're already doing.
414
:So for something you want to learn
how to do, just incorporate it,
415
:stack it on top of an activity that
you're already doing in your life.
416
:And so you're already getting in the car.
417
:You're already on the plane.
418
:Like just have those be indicators or
markers to be like, Oh, let's pray.
419
:Yeah.
420
:So those are just two very, very simple.
421
:Yeah, I think maybe the next level
could be like praying a rosary together.
422
:Yeah.
423
:Because I think what, what makes
it easy about the rosary is that
424
:the prayers are given to you.
425
:And so like, you're not
worried or, you know.
426
:Feeling self conscious about like how
you're praying or what words you're
427
:saying, the words are given to you.
428
:And I think where you could kind of
like incorporate a little bit more
429
:of that, like prayer together is
like speaking your intentions out
430
:loud at the beginning of the rosary.
431
:Um, that's a level of vulnerability
to kind of share what's on your heart,
432
:what you want prayers for without
actually having to be like, You
433
:praying for your spouse out loud yet.
434
:So, you know, your attention could just
be like, Hey, I've just been like having
435
:a really rough time at work, feeling
like just inadequate about myself.
436
:Like just put prayer for confidence
and for, you know, whatever it is
437
:that you're looking for, or maybe you
have a family member who's struggling,
438
:whatever you feel like you want
to Want prayers for in your life?
439
:Just speak them out loud.
440
:I actually love that, that I feel like
most times when we're, uh, talking about
441
:intercessions that we were praying for,
like for the beginning of a rosary or
442
:when other people are asking like, Hey,
like, what do you need prayers for?
443
:We oftentimes most go to, Oh,
pray for my mom, pray for my
444
:friend, pray for this, like other
people, which don't get me wrong.
445
:Those are great.
446
:But especially when you're praying
with your spouse or significant other,
447
:Like share the things that are on
your heart that you specifically need
448
:prayers for, because that's a beautiful
way to just like baby step, like dip
449
:your toes into sharing that part of
your heart, part of your heart more.
450
:And then you don't have, then you're
just, you lean on the rosary, the power
451
:of the rosary and you say that together.
452
:So I love that as like the next step, I
would say the third or like, uh, I don't
453
:know what number we're on, but the next
level is every morning, every night.
454
:Pick one to start with, do both if you
can, but start and end your days in
455
:prayer, same thing like praying before
meals or praying when you travel.
456
:It can be so simple.
457
:Don't overcomplicate this.
458
:You can take turns doing it.
459
:But literally just say like,
ask the Lord, like what you're
460
:thankful for, what's on your heart.
461
:Yeah.
462
:What you're struggling with.
463
:Yeah.
464
:I get it.
465
:Intentions you have for
yourself and for other people.
466
:I, I am trying to remember what, like
the acronym was for it, but I feel like
467
:growing up we learned something love,
like, like praise petition, you know,
468
:there's also like the pirate prayer.
469
:Okay.
470
:What is the primary?
471
:Okay.
472
:Say what that is.
473
:I don't know.
474
:It's.
475
:It's like adoration.
476
:Okay.
477
:Then a bunch of ours.
478
:That was so unhelpful.
479
:Respect.
480
:I mean, I'm going to look it
up right now, but I mean, they
481
:all are basically the same.
482
:It's adoration or praise petition.
483
:Uh, Thanksgiving.
484
:Okay.
485
:I've got it.
486
:I'm looking up an acronym
on my phone and, um.
487
:The one the A.
488
:R.
489
:R.
490
:1 is 1 that we can do, but the
1 that I've heard most is acts.
491
:Yes, I do.
492
:So it's a stands for adoration.
493
:C.
494
:confession T.
495
:Thanksgiving and S.
496
:supplication.
497
:And so.
498
:acts.
499
:This is a really easy way to
remember kind of like how, what
500
:I could say in my prayer time.
501
:Right.
502
:And you can honestly like use this
framework for a two minute prayer, five
503
:minute prayer and a 30 minute prayer.
504
:Um, it's just about what goes in order.
505
:And again, there's no right or wrong or
wrong way, but if you're stuck and don't
506
:know how to pray and don't know what to
say, this is a really great framework.
507
:So one.
508
:A stands for adoration.
509
:So acknowledge God in and
praise him and just love him.
510
:I mean, Trey, when he started out today's
prayer, he said like the heavenly father.
511
:And I think you were saying, you
said something like, we praise
512
:you and we love you just kind of
like a moment of adoration and
513
:thinking the Lord for who he is.
514
:Then it's C confession.
515
:And this can be time when you just,
Um, ask the Lord for forgiveness for
516
:maybe ways that you acted wrongly
throughout the day or, um, didn't
517
:live according to like his plan for
you or, or a Christ centered life.
518
:That's a good way to put it.
519
:Yeah.
520
:Um, tease for Thanksgiving.
521
:So then spend time thinking the
Lord for his blessings in your life.
522
:Thank you for my family, for our home,
for our food, our health, whatever
523
:it is that you're thankful for.
524
:Amen.
525
:Amen.
526
:Easy things, easy things you guys.
527
:And then S you end with supplication.
528
:And this is a request or
a petition in your life.
529
:Um, a specific intention that
you're hoping to pray for, whether
530
:it's for yourself or people in
your life or for your marriage.
531
:So that's a great framework.
532
:You don't have to be confined
to that if you don't want to,
533
:but if you feel stuck, acts.
534
:So you can do that.
535
:We were talking about, you can
do that in the morning and night
536
:when you're praying together.
537
:Um, I feel like that kind of
starts getting into like, you know,
538
:a five minute prayer together.
539
:Yeah.
540
:If that like two to five minutes
before you go to sleep or when you
541
:wake up off of the day of the Lord.
542
:Before we go to sleep, it's a great
time to reflect on the day, give
543
:thanks, um, and always be asking
the Lord for what's on your heart.
544
:Yeah.
545
:Okay.
546
:Next practical step that is a little
bit more involved, I think, would
547
:be praying with scripture together.
548
:I would say one before that it's real
quick that is really good and powerful
549
:is just going to adoration together.
550
:You don't even have to speak
out loud to each other.
551
:Like just sit next to each other.
552
:In the presence of our Lord
and be praying together.
553
:That's great.
554
:You don't have to say anything out loud.
555
:Uh, but I would just throw that in there.
556
:That's so important.
557
:I think that's beautiful.
558
:And yeah, you're just in front of the
Lord together and letting him do the work.
559
:So just go to adoration together, sit
in silence, 20, 30 minutes, an hour.
560
:That's another option.
561
:Yeah.
562
:And just have like your
own personal prayer time.
563
:Yeah.
564
:But doing it alongside your
spouse, it makes a difference.
565
:Okay.
566
:So then we'll be praying
scripture together.
567
:So Why don't you talk about kind of
like, yeah, how people can do this.
568
:I would go back to Mari's episode
where she prays with scripture.
569
:It's called like, Bible study with Mari.
570
:That's just a very tangible
example of a way to pray with
571
:scripture, like so divina.
572
:And you can just do that with your spouse.
573
:Like literally I was at this talk too.
574
:I can't remember who was giving
this talk, but like every morning
575
:he comes downstairs, makes a cup
of coffee for him and his wife.
576
:And then You know, five, 10 minutes later,
the wife will trickle on downstairs and
577
:the Bible will be on the kitchen table.
578
:There'll be two cups of coffee and
they'll just be tired, like maybe
579
:hangry or just like waking up, like not
like doing anything beautiful or like
580
:doing anything like performance based.
581
:It's literally just like
showing up, showing up.
582
:And they just, whether they're going
through a book or just the daily readings
583
:or the daily gospel, and you just read it
together, like, you just read it together
584
:and maybe sit some time in silence.
585
:If you're doing like Alexio form,
read a couple of times and just sit
586
:in silence together with scripture.
587
:And then if anything sticks out to
you, like a certain phrase, just
588
:share that and why it stuck out
to you with your significant other
589
:and then end in just like a prayer
Thanksgiving and, and I don't know
590
:that you have any suggestions on that.
591
:No, I mean, I think this is such a
beautiful exercise to do together because
592
:I think it opens up a little bit of a
deeper level of vulnerability to dive into
593
:scripture together and talk about like,
what is resonating with you, but at the
594
:same time, you're just letting it out.
595
:God do the work because
scripture is, is a living word.
596
:It is applicable to your life in so
many different parts of your life.
597
:Honestly, every time you read scripture,
it's gonna hit different and it's
598
:going to speak differently to you.
599
:And so you're really just allowing the
Lord to speak to you and you're just.
600
:Kind of recapping what you're feeling.
601
:Yeah.
602
:Literally you're letting the
Lord be the one inspired word.
603
:You just have to repeat what he says.
604
:Yes.
605
:And I do recommend like when
you're sitting down to pray,
606
:having one of you open in prayer
and invite the Lord into it.
607
:Um, the Lord is always with
us, but he wants to be invited.
608
:He wants to be acknowledged
and invited into our prayer
609
:and into relationship with him.
610
:And so start out with just
being like, come Holy spirit.
611
:We always invite the Holy spirit is just,
Powerful and gives us the words to pray.
612
:And it allows us to, I feel like
kind of like remove these, like
613
:more fleshly layers and just be more
of like in tune with our soul and
614
:really like hear the word of God.
615
:So invite the Holy Spirit to be like
Holy Spirit, come Holy Spirit, um, teach
616
:us to pray with the scripture today and
just allow God's word to be clear to us.
617
:Like, what does he want to
speak to us in our life?
618
:And then just read.
619
:Read together and have
some moments of silence.
620
:It's okay to have some moments of silence.
621
:And then you kind of just ask
like, Hey, what stood out to you?
622
:You don't have to like, ask like, what
theologically do you think this means?
623
:Just literally what stood out to you?
624
:Like literally you don't have to recap.
625
:Like what we're not asking you to
interpret what God's trying to teach.
626
:You know, it's just like, what word.
627
:Moved your heart.
628
:What resonated with you or how can you
apply what was read to your day that day?
629
:Yeah, why do you think
it stood out to you?
630
:Do you think the lord's trying
to do something in your life?
631
:Like do you think he's trying to
speak something in your life or
632
:is there a decision that you're
weighing on your heart heavily?
633
:and And this scripture kind of
gave some insight to what to do
634
:and discussing that together.
635
:And then ending with a prayer of
Thanksgiving, like, thank you, Lord,
636
:for speaking to us through your word.
637
:Thank you for giving us your word.
638
:Um, thank you for my spouse and
how I'm able to just seek truth and
639
:relationship with you with my spouse.
640
:And amen.
641
:Yeah.
642
:I think the biggest, biggest, biggest
thing that we're trying to communicate,
643
:um, is is don't overcomplicate it.
644
:There's no right way to do it.
645
:It can be so, so simple,
but it's so powerful.
646
:It's so powerful in bringing
you and your spouse together.
647
:And it's so powerful.
648
:And like I said, inviting God into
your marriage, you can be Catholic,
649
:you can be baptized Catholics that
go to Sunday mass every Sunday
650
:and maybe even do other things.
651
:But if you're not actively inviting
God into your relationship,
652
:it's going to look different.
653
:practical step that I feel like is.
654
:Maybe the top tier level, would you say?
655
:Yeah, it's at least the
most intimate level.
656
:Yes, would be intercessory
prayer with each other.
657
:So this looks like praying with
each other out loud for the specific
658
:intentions your spouse is asking for.
659
:Yeah, so it would be me interceding
for Mari for whatever it is.
660
:That's going on in her heart.
661
:A lot of the times in like Christian
and even Catholic circles, you hear
662
:it as like praying over each other.
663
:I've heard back and forth
things on whether this is
664
:like an accurate term or not.
665
:You're just praying with each
other for each other, but.
666
:Um, if that kind of clears up what we're
talking about, I know some people know
667
:it as like praying over each other.
668
:So, um, practically what this looks
like, for example, if I'm like
669
:super anxious about something that's
happening in our lives, I'll be like,
670
:Trey, like, here's how I'm feeling.
671
:I'm like feeling super anxious.
672
:I'm stuck.
673
:I'm lost.
674
:Like, this is how I feel in
my relationship with God.
675
:Like, I don't know where he is.
676
:I don't know what to do.
677
:Can you pray for me?
678
:Yeah, I think sharing a few specific
things, like, try to be specific.
679
:Don't be so vague where you're like,
hey, can you just pray for me right now?
680
:Um, like share a couple specific
things that are on your heart.
681
:Hey, I'm feeling anxious.
682
:Hey, I just feel really
lost, confused with God.
683
:I don't have a desire to pray.
684
:Like, and then can you pray
for me for those things?
685
:And then, um, like I'll
just put my hand on Mari.
686
:Like, we'll just start in prayer.
687
:And then I just ask like, how many
fire we thank you for a daughter, Mari.
688
:I just pray that.
689
:Yeah.
690
:You give her peace and you send
the spirit of peace upon her.
691
:Pray that you make your will known
to her so that she doesn't feel lost.
692
:I pray that you give her the grace
to respond to the ways that you're
693
:calling her to live in this life.
694
:Uh, we ask that you just overwhelm
her with a desire and love for you
695
:so that she can enter in her prayer.
696
:I pray you remove any apathy, like Holy
spirit in the name of Jesus Christ.
697
:Reveal the lie that she's unloved or
that, uh, prayer is not important.
698
:Amen.
699
:If there's any lines that are coming up,
like Mari can share those and then we can
700
:rebuke those in the name of Jesus Christ.
701
:And then like we end in prayer, like
praise and Thanksgiving where we love you.
702
:Thank you for the graces
you've bestowed upon us.
703
:Like we thank you for this time of prayer.
704
:Sometimes we'll like end with
praying a Hail Mary, inviting
705
:Mary to intercede for us as well.
706
:Yeah.
707
:So that's a, like, that's the, uh, the
next layer is more intimate, but it's
708
:where we should all aspire to go to.
709
:I don't.
710
:The, the easy ways praying before
meals, praying, uh, when you travel,
711
:praying with scripture, like those
are all like, we babysit, you're
712
:stepping in this direction, but like,
I would encourage you that don't
713
:settle for just praying before meals.
714
:Pray with scripture.
715
:Work your way.
716
:Yeah.
717
:Pray the rosary.
718
:Work your way up.
719
:Pray.
720
:Intercessory prayer guy,
like all together routinely.
721
:And then, and then even like when you have
a family and you have children, like teach
722
:your children, model it for your children.
723
:I saw this one video once too.
724
:And maybe that's where we saw the whole,
like the couple praying with coffee
725
:and Bible scripture in the morning.
726
:I think like the line was like, we
do this every morning for ourselves,
727
:but we also do it for our children.
728
:Like we want our children to grow up
seeing a marriage that is centered
729
:in God and is rooted in prayer.
730
:And so.
731
:Working it into your relationship, not
only blesses you and your marriage,
732
:but will bless your children and
their future marriages as well.
733
:I mean, they'll grow up seeing, they'll
grow up seeing a husband and wife
734
:that are rooted in prayer and go to
each other in prayer and have that
735
:level of intimacy in their faith.
736
:And they are, they'll be wanting
to seek that hopefully within their
737
:marriage, their future marriage as well.
738
:And so, um, you can pray with your kids
then too, and kind of model it for them.
739
:Yeah, I hope this was helpful.
740
:And just know that like your significant
other, while it's awkward and while it's
741
:difficult to start, it will get better.
742
:It will get better.
743
:It's, you know, the momentum.
744
:Like once you start and you start
doing it, and you start doing it, then
745
:it'll get easier and easier and easier.
746
:Um, and like they're not gonna judge you.
747
:Like they're probably feeling awkward too.
748
:And they're going to be super,
like, they're going to admire
749
:you and respect you a ton to put
yourself out there and try it.
750
:Um, so just honestly,
just get over yourselves.
751
:This is important.
752
:And just do it.
753
:Yeah.
754
:Do you want to close in prayer, Mari?
755
:Anything else you want to add?
756
:No.
757
:I mean, there's so many other ways
to, I know I started the podcast
758
:saying like, we're going to talk about
different ways to incorporate faith
759
:into your marriage, but honestly,
the foundational thing is prayer.
760
:And that's where we're really here
to talk about, but we're going
761
:to have to do a part two of like
other ways to incorporate faith.
762
:Cause it's.
763
:Uh, just a God centered marriage is, is
such a blessing is so fruitful to your
764
:life and to the world and is so necessary.
765
:So we need to keep the conversation
going, but we got to wrap up because
766
:we actually got to get to mass.
767
:So let's close in prayer.
768
:In the name of the
father, son, Holy spirit.
769
:Amen.
770
:Come Holy spirit.
771
:Lord, we thank you for this, uh, time
together of Trey and I being able to
772
:talk about prayer with each other.
773
:Um, thank you for this time with our
listeners who are learning about how to
774
:incorporate you and prayer into their
life more, into their relationship more.
775
:Um, we pray for good and holy marriages.
776
:We pray for, um, people to desire to
include you in their relationship even
777
:more into their marriage even more and
for them to root themselves in you.
778
:Um, we pray for our listeners for you to
give them a spirit of courage, um, and
779
:zeal, uh, in their faith and for them
to be able to take that first step and
780
:bring it up to their spouse and say,
Hey, I really think we should do this.
781
:And we pray for the spouse or the
significant other to have an openness in
782
:their heart to enter into prayer together.
783
:And we ask this all in your
most holy name, Jesus Christ.
784
:And we ask for the intercession
of your mother as we pray.
785
:Hail Mary, full of grace.
786
:The Lord is with thee.
787
:Blessed art thou among women and
blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.
788
:Holy Mary, mother of God, pray for us
sinners now and at the hour of our death.
789
:Amen.
790
:In the father, son, Holy spirit.
791
:Amen.
792
:Thanks guys.