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23: Your Guide to Praying Together as a Couple
Episode 2321st August 2024 • Ever Be • Mari Wagner
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Mari and Trey chat about the significance of integrating prayer into relationships, and especially marriages. They discuss their personal experiences with prayer during different stages of their relationship and offer practical advice on how to start praying together, from simple blessings over meals to more intimate intercessory prayer. The episode emphasizes the importance of inviting God into one's relationship and provides actionable steps for couples to grow spiritually together.

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Transcripts

Speaker:

Hey, I'm your host, Mari Wagner,

and you're listening to the ever be

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podcast where faith meets lifestyle.

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I'm so excited you're here, whether you're

a new listener or a longtime follower,

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I know there's something here for you.

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Pull up a chair and listen in for

insightful real life conversations

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and actionable steps on how to claim

the full life God created you for.

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If you're a woman desiring to live

a Christ centered life in today's

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modern world, then this is for you.

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Welcome to Ever Be.

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mari---trey_1_08-18-2024_070753:

Welcome back, everybody.

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And welcome back, Trey.

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Thank you.

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Good to be here.

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As always.

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Back for another episode.

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Um, today we're going to be

chatting about how to incorporate

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faith into your relationship as

a couple, specifically prayer.

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We feel that this has been A really like

integral part of our faith relationship

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as a married couple throughout the years.

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And even as, um, an engaged couple,

and we'll talk a little bit about like

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incorporating it into your dating.

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If you're not engaged,

you're married yet either.

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Um, and I think the more.

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We, I don't know, just live life the

more we realize this isn't like a

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normal thing that a lot of couples do,

or it's something that maybe people

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want to do, but it's kind of foreign

or it's a little bit weird for people.

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Like it's a little awkward to kind

of get, get started and get into it.

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Um, so.

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And we feel like it's so important to

learn how to pray with your spouse.

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Yeah.

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I mean, you don't just feel like it

that's, it is extremely important

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to pray with your spouse and to have

prayer be an integral part of your

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relationship, whether you're dating or

married, um, those relationships will

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look different, but prayer definitely

needs to be a foundational part of.

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Right.

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And I mean, if we go back to our goal

of having a God centered marriage,

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I mean, if you think of like, how

do you have a Christ centered life?

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I mean, you have to root yourself

in prayer and your relationship

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with God is developed through

intentional daily prayer.

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And so in a similar way to really have

a God centered marriage, to really

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have your marriage be rooted in God.

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You know what the Holy Spirit's calling

you to do and the way the Lord wants you

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to live out a good and Holy marriage.

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You have to know the Lord

together as a couple and you

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have to invite the Lord into your

relationship via prayer as a couple.

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So that's what we're

going to get into today.

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And I'm excited.

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Let's get started.

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Okay.

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We'll start off in a prayer.

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In the Father, in the

Son, in the Holy Spirit.

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Amen.

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I'm Holy Spirit.

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Heavenly Father, we give you

praise and thanks this morning.

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We thank you for.

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Always that you love us,

always that you bless us.

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Thank you for my marriage with Mari.

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Thank you for our families

and for our health.

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Thank you for this podcast and the ways

that you are using Mari and I to spread

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your love and to lead people to you.

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We pray that.

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The words on this, our words on

this podcast today will be your

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words that you'll inspire us,

that you'll send your Holy spirit

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into our hearts to fill our minds.

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I would pray for protection, uh, over

the equipment and the technology today.

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Uh, that'll be a smooth recording

and that, uh, we pray for all

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the listeners that there'll be

blessed by this podcast and that.

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Uh, you'll give them the grace to

integrate prayer into their marriage

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and their relationships and they marry.

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We trust all this to you.

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In Jesus name.

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We pray.

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Thanks babe.

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Yeah.

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Okay.

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Where are we starting?

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I think we start with

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before you can begin to pray as a

couple, you have to be praying yourself.

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Uh, that is primary.

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Uh, and so if you're not

praying, you're not praying.

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And you don't have your own individual

relationship with God and you're

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not having daily prayer yourself.

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I start there.

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Uh, you've recorded a

podcast or two on prayer.

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I know.

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Yeah.

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At least two.

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I know.

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I know there's one full one that like

breaks down, I think more of like the

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catechesis of theology on like the

importance of prayer and what prayer is.

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And then I think one of the more

recent ones was literally just like

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breakdown ways to have a prayer routine

consistently, like minute by minute.

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Very practical.

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Yeah.

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So go listen to those.

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Go listen to those.

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But that's first.

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If you're not praying

yourself, start there.

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Yeah.

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It's most important.

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Yeah.

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And when we're talking about prayer, if

you haven't heard those other episodes,

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we're talking about like sustained

time in silence with God and either

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that's you literally being silent and

allowing for God to speak into your

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life or you spending time in quiet,

personal prayer, journaling, reading

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scripture, speaking to God on your own,

like mental prayer, um, that's truly.

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What prayer looks like.

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That's truly how you

develop that relationship.

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So as Catholics, we're so used to those

rope prayers, which are good and beautiful

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and still should be prayed, but just

praying a hail Mary or in our father,

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isn't the extent that your prayer can go.

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And isn't the extent that your

relationship with the father can go.

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So just wanted to make that note.

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Yeah.

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And praying as you fall asleep

or thinking about God while you

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drive is good, but it's not.

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It's not, it's not, you're

still missing the point there.

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It's not, it shouldn't be the

extent of your prayer life.

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Yeah.

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Um, somebody told us last night

that, uh, God, God doesn't

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think of you as an afterthought.

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You shouldn't think of

God as an afterthought.

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So don't have God as the afterthought

of Um, praying in the car, like, Oh,

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like a toss up prayer before you go to

sleep, make intentional time for him.

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So start there.

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Yeah.

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And my, my challenge here

specifically, I think we hear a lot.

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I mean, we've said it ourselves, we've

fallen into this as well, but like, it's

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very common to hear people say, yeah,

my faith is my number one priority.

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It's like the, the, the most important

thing in my life to me is my faith.

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But if you're not praying.

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How is that really true?

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That's my question, right?

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If you're not actually, if you don't

actually have a committed daily prayer

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life or striving for one, right?

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If you're not striving for one and

striving to know Jesus truly in a personal

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relationship, is that really true?

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Is your faith, is Jesus, is

your relationship with Jesus

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really number one in your life?

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Because we make time for the

things that we find important.

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So we find time to scroll on our phones.

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We find time to work.

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We find time to go out with

friends, you know, travel,

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whatever it is you find important.

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And so I just want to challenge you

there and feel like if, if you feel

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that way in your life, if you've

said that in your life, you know,

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How is that actually playing out?

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Because I think that's the hardest part

is actually recognizing like, what does it

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look like to put Jesus first in my life?

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And I would, I would say it

starts with daily prayer.

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Absolutely.

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And don't get us wrong.

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Like it's hard and it's very challenging

and we fail all the time, but we're always

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on the struggle bus with prayer, but

we're always trying to incorporate it.

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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Absolutely.

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Yeah.

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It's all about getting back up.

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So praying as a couple.

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Okay.

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So I think let's just talk a little

bit about like how we even started

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incorporating into our life, like

how it actually just naturally

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incorporated into our relationship.

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Do it.

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Okay.

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So when we.

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We're dating.

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There was the summer kind of in

those first few months of our dating

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relationship where we both went and

did internships or mission type,

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uh, like work for that summer.

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You were at life team for

the summer in Georgia.

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And I was doing an internship with focus

here out in Colorado for the summer.

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And that was kind of our

first real exposure to this

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like amazing Catholic world.

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And, you know, Kind of the first time we

started to live, like, vibrant Catholic

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lives, like, Christ centered lives.

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We didn't really know what

that looked like before then.

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And one thing that we both experienced

was prayer with other people.

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At least, I don't think I'd

ever experienced that before.

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Like At least not to the extent.

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I don't know if I'd ever really

had anybody Pray for me like that.

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Like maybe in youth group, the leader

would like pray us out or pray us in,

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but that summer, I mean, I not only

experienced like Bible study with other

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people, like talking about scripture with

other people, but at the same time, um,

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people also offering to like, pray over

me and like pray for specific intentions

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and do like intercessory prayer.

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And so that was a really cool experience

because the Holy Spirit was a.

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Part of the Trinity that I

was very unfamiliar with.

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I think, um, I think I always kind

of had a relationship with the

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father and then was kind of working

on my relationship with Jesus.

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And the Holy Spirit was just kind of this,

like, elusive thing that was happening.

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And I think that's the

case for a lot of people.

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And so people were like, let's invite

the Holy Spirit into our prayer.

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Like, let's pray intercessory prayer.

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And, um, I think it was really good

to kind of have that experience

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apart from each other, because it

kind of normalized it a little bit.

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Yeah, and I, and I mean, like, we

learned how to do it on our own first.

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Yeah, yeah, exactly.

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Cause I think it's, you can

definitely learn together and that's

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beautiful, but I think it helps to.

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That was just our experience.

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Yeah, that was our experience.

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It's like, we learned how

to pray individually and we

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were able to do it together.

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Yeah, and so then when we came back to

campus after that summer, I mean, we

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were talking about all these experiences

all throughout the summer together.

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And then when we came back to campus, um,

I think it was our mentor friend, Jeremy,

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or either it was just us reflecting from

the summer who encouraged us to like.

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Continue to pray with each other.

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Um, well, at that point we were already

discerning engagement and that's something

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like as your relationship is progressing,

it's more and more important to

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incorporate prayer into your relationship.

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And so, yeah, we were encouraged by

mentors to make sure that prayer was a

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foundational aspect of our relationship.

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And so then we kind of

just started trying.

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Yeah.

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So what did that look like?

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Well, I remember us doing two things.

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I remember us praying with scripture.

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I remember that like, I think it was

like every other Thursday morning

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there was a stretch where you would

come over to my house and we would

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pick a chapter in the gospels.

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What?

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That's great.

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I don't remember that.

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You don't remember that?

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I remember praying with

scripture together.

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I don't remember that.

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It was every other Thursday.

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After this summer or that one summer,

like we were praying scripture before

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this because we were both in that like.

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Gospels class where we like our

homework was to pray scripture.

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So that was a unique part of our

relationship where we were like

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reading scripture together from like

day one before we were even dating.

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But then after the summer, I know

that we were like intentional

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about praying it together.

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And so I remember it was like Thursday

mornings, you would come over and

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I'm not saying we did this for like

months on end, but like there were

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several times on Thursday mornings

where you would come over and we

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would like pray with scripture.

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I love that you know,

because it's Thursdays.

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Feel like it was a Thursday.

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That's great.

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Um, Hey, women with the berries gatherers.

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So like we have good memories,

you know, it was, it was real.

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And, and so I think like one of us

would open in prayer and just like,

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ask like God to be present and to

like speak to us through his word.

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We would pick a piece of scripture,

kind of like chat about it,

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pray with it and then close out.

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And then there were also times when.

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One of us felt like we needed, like,

particular prayer intentions to

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be prayed over that then we would

pray with each other for, um, I'm

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just trying to think of examples.

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Um, if we were starting a big decision,

or if we were feeling really stressed

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or anxious about something, or if there

was just something going on in our

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lives that we were just struggling with.

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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And since we weren't discerning

engagement, I remember praying

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us us praying about that a lot.

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Like maybe after a date night or

something, we'd be just in the car and

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be like, okay, like, let's just pray.

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And you just pray.

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Pray in the car for like God's

discernment to be clear for our

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discernment to be clear and God's

will to be clear and Just what yeah,

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whatever was going on in our lives Yeah,

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and I think that at first it was

like maybe a little bit awkward at

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times Like when we were first getting

into it like it wasn't like Boom.

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You know how to do this.

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And it's like fireworks and

the Holy Spirit's just flowing.

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Like, I feel like, and there's kind

of awkward at first learning and

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just kind of, yeah, that's what

I would describe it as awkward.

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So let's talk about

like, why is it awkward?

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Right?

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Because that's just a true fact.

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And you hear that a lot from people that

like, probably the number one thing that

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prevents couples from praying is, It's

either they don't know how or they're

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just not really comfortable doing it.

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They feel awkward.

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They feel like I'm not doing it right

or I don't know how to initiate it or

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I feel like nervous that I don't know,

like my spouse is gonna not want to

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do it with me or judge the way I say

things or like maybe you just like

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don't even know how to say things.

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You kind of get stage fright

when you're on the spot, right?

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So, uh, that's how you feel.

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I think everybody has felt that.

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Yeah.

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You're not alone.

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And I think that like, it's

important to point that out because

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I remember this mentor that we were

talking about that like kind of

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encouraged us to incorporate prayer.

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He would tell us prayer

is more intimate than sex.

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And so like, if you can't pray together,

like, how are you coming together?

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In the sacrament of marriage,

like this is the most intimate

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form of your relationship.

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And so I think there is something

about it being awkward that shows

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like there's a sacredness to it.

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There's, um, you're burying

your souls to each other.

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Exactly.

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Like you're burying your

souls to each other.

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So yeah, there's a level of intimacy

that happens when you pray together.

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Yeah.

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So it's okay if it feels weird and

it's okay if it feels like not normal

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or awkward, like that's normal, but

I promise you the more you do it,

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the more comfortable you'll feel.

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It's just like learning any new skill.

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It's not going to feel natural at first.

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You're going to have some learning

pains, but it's important.

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And so if you stick with it,

it will become more natural.

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So.

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What are ways, like the easy, natural ways

to incorporate prayer into a relationship?

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Yeah.

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Should we just start with practicals?

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Like, and let's just start with like easy

to more advanced, if you will, you know?

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And so we'll start off with the really

basic ones that you can, if this is

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something that's totally new to you,

or maybe you've tried to incorporate

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it into your relationship and your

significant other or your spouse is like.

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Pretty against it or like nervous

about it or not open to it.

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I think these easy stepping stone

practical tips will like help you kind

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of like slowly get into it because

you can do this because you can do it.

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So number one would be blessing

the meal, like praying over

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your food before you eat.

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That's something that.

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A lot of Catholics, most Catholics,

most Christians know how to do even

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just like, if you've never prayed

it out loud yourself, even just

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from the standpoint of like, you

know, what's supposed to be said.

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Thank you for this food.

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Thank you for my family.

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Like please bless this food, Lord.

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Right.

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Yeah.

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Like you don't, there is

the bless us at Lord prayer.

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Yeah.

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You're welcome to use that.

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And pray out loud with each other.

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Don't just say it in your head, but you

don't have to, like that is not required.

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You can literally say whatever

you want, like food for those

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who don't have any, whatever.

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And so, and there's something so impactful

about having the man lead in this aspect.

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And so this is a great practical way for.

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Him to be start getting comfortable.

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I think like comfortable leading

and initiating it himself.

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Yeah.

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And so just like encouraging him to

be the one to pray and Thanksgiving

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and bless the food in his own words.

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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You can, yeah, definitely start

with the, bless us a Lord prayer

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if you want, but you could graduate

into just praying out loud.

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Just like, thank you for this food

pray that it nurtures our body.

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We pray for those who go without today.

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I think for all of our blessings, amen.

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Amen.

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Exactly.

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And as women, as wives, like be

encouraging of that, be supportive.

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Don't be critical about it.

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Don't be like, Oh, like you

should say this in your prayer.

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You shouldn't say it that way.

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You know, like, just like be loving

and encouraging and thank him for

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leading in that prayer and slowly.

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You'll build him up to have that

confidence to lead you both in

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prayer and kind of bigger ways.

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Yeah.

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It's a great stepping stone to be

comfortable praying on your own,

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like with free prayers as opposed

to just reciting the road prayers.

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Yeah.

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I think that's the other reason.

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And we've touched on a little

bit why people feel a little bit

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uncomfortable is like, you A lot of

times you can be self conscious about

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like how you're praying out loud.

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And if you're saying the right words

or beautiful words or not, and the

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reality is like, you can't pray wrong.

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Yeah.

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You can't pray wrong.

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You really can't pray wrong.

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And whether you are like super poetic

in your prayer or super basic in

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your prayer, it has the same effect.

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The Lord loves it all.

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It's not like one prayer is more

powerful or better than the other.

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So don't get caught up in that.

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And Just talk as if you're

talking to somebody else.

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Just like, don't get caught up in like

fancy language when you're praying.

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Okay.

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Another example of times in your life

when you can just incorporate prayer very

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naturally is we do it when we travel.

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So anytime we're on a plane and a plane

is taking off, we'll just lean over

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to each other and just pray out loud.

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That's, we just free pray.

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We usually alternate.

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Yeah.

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We'll just take turns.

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But then I encourage you, especially

at the beginning to initiate it.

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Even if you don't, aren't the one that's

saying the it's like, Lean over to your

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wife or your girlfriend, fiance, and

say like, Hey, can you pray, like, at

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least be the one to initiate it and then

just pray like for like, like, Lord,

397

:

we pray that you keep us safe on these

travels that you pray for the pilot that

398

:

he'll be able to fly the plane safely.

399

:

It's great for all those other

people that are traveling.

400

:

Like, thank you for the

opportunity to be on this trip.

401

:

That's it.

402

:

Yeah.

403

:

Literally take 10 seconds.

404

:

Um, you can do it for

when you're on the plane.

405

:

You can do it when you're

going on road trips, you do

406

:

it anytime you get in the car.

407

:

Uh, but those are just kind of like, we

do it anytime we go on a road trip, just

408

:

like bless this trip, bless the road,

bless our car and the vehicles around us.

409

:

Thank you for giving us

this opportunity to travel.

410

:

Yeah, those are very easy

ways to with meals and with.

411

:

Traveling that's the Mari likes

to call it habit stacking.

412

:

Other people have called it that as well,

where you're just incorporating something

413

:

into something you're already doing.

414

:

So for something you want to learn

how to do, just incorporate it,

415

:

stack it on top of an activity that

you're already doing in your life.

416

:

And so you're already getting in the car.

417

:

You're already on the plane.

418

:

Like just have those be indicators or

markers to be like, Oh, let's pray.

419

:

Yeah.

420

:

So those are just two very, very simple.

421

:

Yeah, I think maybe the next level

could be like praying a rosary together.

422

:

Yeah.

423

:

Because I think what, what makes

it easy about the rosary is that

424

:

the prayers are given to you.

425

:

And so like, you're not

worried or, you know.

426

:

Feeling self conscious about like how

you're praying or what words you're

427

:

saying, the words are given to you.

428

:

And I think where you could kind of

like incorporate a little bit more

429

:

of that, like prayer together is

like speaking your intentions out

430

:

loud at the beginning of the rosary.

431

:

Um, that's a level of vulnerability

to kind of share what's on your heart,

432

:

what you want prayers for without

actually having to be like, You

433

:

praying for your spouse out loud yet.

434

:

So, you know, your attention could just

be like, Hey, I've just been like having

435

:

a really rough time at work, feeling

like just inadequate about myself.

436

:

Like just put prayer for confidence

and for, you know, whatever it is

437

:

that you're looking for, or maybe you

have a family member who's struggling,

438

:

whatever you feel like you want

to Want prayers for in your life?

439

:

Just speak them out loud.

440

:

I actually love that, that I feel like

most times when we're, uh, talking about

441

:

intercessions that we were praying for,

like for the beginning of a rosary or

442

:

when other people are asking like, Hey,

like, what do you need prayers for?

443

:

We oftentimes most go to, Oh,

pray for my mom, pray for my

444

:

friend, pray for this, like other

people, which don't get me wrong.

445

:

Those are great.

446

:

But especially when you're praying

with your spouse or significant other,

447

:

Like share the things that are on

your heart that you specifically need

448

:

prayers for, because that's a beautiful

way to just like baby step, like dip

449

:

your toes into sharing that part of

your heart, part of your heart more.

450

:

And then you don't have, then you're

just, you lean on the rosary, the power

451

:

of the rosary and you say that together.

452

:

So I love that as like the next step, I

would say the third or like, uh, I don't

453

:

know what number we're on, but the next

level is every morning, every night.

454

:

Pick one to start with, do both if you

can, but start and end your days in

455

:

prayer, same thing like praying before

meals or praying when you travel.

456

:

It can be so simple.

457

:

Don't overcomplicate this.

458

:

You can take turns doing it.

459

:

But literally just say like,

ask the Lord, like what you're

460

:

thankful for, what's on your heart.

461

:

Yeah.

462

:

What you're struggling with.

463

:

Yeah.

464

:

I get it.

465

:

Intentions you have for

yourself and for other people.

466

:

I, I am trying to remember what, like

the acronym was for it, but I feel like

467

:

growing up we learned something love,

like, like praise petition, you know,

468

:

there's also like the pirate prayer.

469

:

Okay.

470

:

What is the primary?

471

:

Okay.

472

:

Say what that is.

473

:

I don't know.

474

:

It's.

475

:

It's like adoration.

476

:

Okay.

477

:

Then a bunch of ours.

478

:

That was so unhelpful.

479

:

Respect.

480

:

I mean, I'm going to look it

up right now, but I mean, they

481

:

all are basically the same.

482

:

It's adoration or praise petition.

483

:

Uh, Thanksgiving.

484

:

Okay.

485

:

I've got it.

486

:

I'm looking up an acronym

on my phone and, um.

487

:

The one the A.

488

:

R.

489

:

R.

490

:

1 is 1 that we can do, but the

1 that I've heard most is acts.

491

:

Yes, I do.

492

:

So it's a stands for adoration.

493

:

C.

494

:

confession T.

495

:

Thanksgiving and S.

496

:

supplication.

497

:

And so.

498

:

acts.

499

:

This is a really easy way to

remember kind of like how, what

500

:

I could say in my prayer time.

501

:

Right.

502

:

And you can honestly like use this

framework for a two minute prayer, five

503

:

minute prayer and a 30 minute prayer.

504

:

Um, it's just about what goes in order.

505

:

And again, there's no right or wrong or

wrong way, but if you're stuck and don't

506

:

know how to pray and don't know what to

say, this is a really great framework.

507

:

So one.

508

:

A stands for adoration.

509

:

So acknowledge God in and

praise him and just love him.

510

:

I mean, Trey, when he started out today's

prayer, he said like the heavenly father.

511

:

And I think you were saying, you

said something like, we praise

512

:

you and we love you just kind of

like a moment of adoration and

513

:

thinking the Lord for who he is.

514

:

Then it's C confession.

515

:

And this can be time when you just,

Um, ask the Lord for forgiveness for

516

:

maybe ways that you acted wrongly

throughout the day or, um, didn't

517

:

live according to like his plan for

you or, or a Christ centered life.

518

:

That's a good way to put it.

519

:

Yeah.

520

:

Um, tease for Thanksgiving.

521

:

So then spend time thinking the

Lord for his blessings in your life.

522

:

Thank you for my family, for our home,

for our food, our health, whatever

523

:

it is that you're thankful for.

524

:

Amen.

525

:

Amen.

526

:

Easy things, easy things you guys.

527

:

And then S you end with supplication.

528

:

And this is a request or

a petition in your life.

529

:

Um, a specific intention that

you're hoping to pray for, whether

530

:

it's for yourself or people in

your life or for your marriage.

531

:

So that's a great framework.

532

:

You don't have to be confined

to that if you don't want to,

533

:

but if you feel stuck, acts.

534

:

So you can do that.

535

:

We were talking about, you can

do that in the morning and night

536

:

when you're praying together.

537

:

Um, I feel like that kind of

starts getting into like, you know,

538

:

a five minute prayer together.

539

:

Yeah.

540

:

If that like two to five minutes

before you go to sleep or when you

541

:

wake up off of the day of the Lord.

542

:

Before we go to sleep, it's a great

time to reflect on the day, give

543

:

thanks, um, and always be asking

the Lord for what's on your heart.

544

:

Yeah.

545

:

Okay.

546

:

Next practical step that is a little

bit more involved, I think, would

547

:

be praying with scripture together.

548

:

I would say one before that it's real

quick that is really good and powerful

549

:

is just going to adoration together.

550

:

You don't even have to speak

out loud to each other.

551

:

Like just sit next to each other.

552

:

In the presence of our Lord

and be praying together.

553

:

That's great.

554

:

You don't have to say anything out loud.

555

:

Uh, but I would just throw that in there.

556

:

That's so important.

557

:

I think that's beautiful.

558

:

And yeah, you're just in front of the

Lord together and letting him do the work.

559

:

So just go to adoration together, sit

in silence, 20, 30 minutes, an hour.

560

:

That's another option.

561

:

Yeah.

562

:

And just have like your

own personal prayer time.

563

:

Yeah.

564

:

But doing it alongside your

spouse, it makes a difference.

565

:

Okay.

566

:

So then we'll be praying

scripture together.

567

:

So Why don't you talk about kind of

like, yeah, how people can do this.

568

:

I would go back to Mari's episode

where she prays with scripture.

569

:

It's called like, Bible study with Mari.

570

:

That's just a very tangible

example of a way to pray with

571

:

scripture, like so divina.

572

:

And you can just do that with your spouse.

573

:

Like literally I was at this talk too.

574

:

I can't remember who was giving

this talk, but like every morning

575

:

he comes downstairs, makes a cup

of coffee for him and his wife.

576

:

And then You know, five, 10 minutes later,

the wife will trickle on downstairs and

577

:

the Bible will be on the kitchen table.

578

:

There'll be two cups of coffee and

they'll just be tired, like maybe

579

:

hangry or just like waking up, like not

like doing anything beautiful or like

580

:

doing anything like performance based.

581

:

It's literally just like

showing up, showing up.

582

:

And they just, whether they're going

through a book or just the daily readings

583

:

or the daily gospel, and you just read it

together, like, you just read it together

584

:

and maybe sit some time in silence.

585

:

If you're doing like Alexio form,

read a couple of times and just sit

586

:

in silence together with scripture.

587

:

And then if anything sticks out to

you, like a certain phrase, just

588

:

share that and why it stuck out

to you with your significant other

589

:

and then end in just like a prayer

Thanksgiving and, and I don't know

590

:

that you have any suggestions on that.

591

:

No, I mean, I think this is such a

beautiful exercise to do together because

592

:

I think it opens up a little bit of a

deeper level of vulnerability to dive into

593

:

scripture together and talk about like,

what is resonating with you, but at the

594

:

same time, you're just letting it out.

595

:

God do the work because

scripture is, is a living word.

596

:

It is applicable to your life in so

many different parts of your life.

597

:

Honestly, every time you read scripture,

it's gonna hit different and it's

598

:

going to speak differently to you.

599

:

And so you're really just allowing the

Lord to speak to you and you're just.

600

:

Kind of recapping what you're feeling.

601

:

Yeah.

602

:

Literally you're letting the

Lord be the one inspired word.

603

:

You just have to repeat what he says.

604

:

Yes.

605

:

And I do recommend like when

you're sitting down to pray,

606

:

having one of you open in prayer

and invite the Lord into it.

607

:

Um, the Lord is always with

us, but he wants to be invited.

608

:

He wants to be acknowledged

and invited into our prayer

609

:

and into relationship with him.

610

:

And so start out with just

being like, come Holy spirit.

611

:

We always invite the Holy spirit is just,

Powerful and gives us the words to pray.

612

:

And it allows us to, I feel like

kind of like remove these, like

613

:

more fleshly layers and just be more

of like in tune with our soul and

614

:

really like hear the word of God.

615

:

So invite the Holy Spirit to be like

Holy Spirit, come Holy Spirit, um, teach

616

:

us to pray with the scripture today and

just allow God's word to be clear to us.

617

:

Like, what does he want to

speak to us in our life?

618

:

And then just read.

619

:

Read together and have

some moments of silence.

620

:

It's okay to have some moments of silence.

621

:

And then you kind of just ask

like, Hey, what stood out to you?

622

:

You don't have to like, ask like, what

theologically do you think this means?

623

:

Just literally what stood out to you?

624

:

Like literally you don't have to recap.

625

:

Like what we're not asking you to

interpret what God's trying to teach.

626

:

You know, it's just like, what word.

627

:

Moved your heart.

628

:

What resonated with you or how can you

apply what was read to your day that day?

629

:

Yeah, why do you think

it stood out to you?

630

:

Do you think the lord's trying

to do something in your life?

631

:

Like do you think he's trying to

speak something in your life or

632

:

is there a decision that you're

weighing on your heart heavily?

633

:

and And this scripture kind of

gave some insight to what to do

634

:

and discussing that together.

635

:

And then ending with a prayer of

Thanksgiving, like, thank you, Lord,

636

:

for speaking to us through your word.

637

:

Thank you for giving us your word.

638

:

Um, thank you for my spouse and

how I'm able to just seek truth and

639

:

relationship with you with my spouse.

640

:

And amen.

641

:

Yeah.

642

:

I think the biggest, biggest, biggest

thing that we're trying to communicate,

643

:

um, is is don't overcomplicate it.

644

:

There's no right way to do it.

645

:

It can be so, so simple,

but it's so powerful.

646

:

It's so powerful in bringing

you and your spouse together.

647

:

And it's so powerful.

648

:

And like I said, inviting God into

your marriage, you can be Catholic,

649

:

you can be baptized Catholics that

go to Sunday mass every Sunday

650

:

and maybe even do other things.

651

:

But if you're not actively inviting

God into your relationship,

652

:

it's going to look different.

653

:

practical step that I feel like is.

654

:

Maybe the top tier level, would you say?

655

:

Yeah, it's at least the

most intimate level.

656

:

Yes, would be intercessory

prayer with each other.

657

:

So this looks like praying with

each other out loud for the specific

658

:

intentions your spouse is asking for.

659

:

Yeah, so it would be me interceding

for Mari for whatever it is.

660

:

That's going on in her heart.

661

:

A lot of the times in like Christian

and even Catholic circles, you hear

662

:

it as like praying over each other.

663

:

I've heard back and forth

things on whether this is

664

:

like an accurate term or not.

665

:

You're just praying with each

other for each other, but.

666

:

Um, if that kind of clears up what we're

talking about, I know some people know

667

:

it as like praying over each other.

668

:

So, um, practically what this looks

like, for example, if I'm like

669

:

super anxious about something that's

happening in our lives, I'll be like,

670

:

Trey, like, here's how I'm feeling.

671

:

I'm like feeling super anxious.

672

:

I'm stuck.

673

:

I'm lost.

674

:

Like, this is how I feel in

my relationship with God.

675

:

Like, I don't know where he is.

676

:

I don't know what to do.

677

:

Can you pray for me?

678

:

Yeah, I think sharing a few specific

things, like, try to be specific.

679

:

Don't be so vague where you're like,

hey, can you just pray for me right now?

680

:

Um, like share a couple specific

things that are on your heart.

681

:

Hey, I'm feeling anxious.

682

:

Hey, I just feel really

lost, confused with God.

683

:

I don't have a desire to pray.

684

:

Like, and then can you pray

for me for those things?

685

:

And then, um, like I'll

just put my hand on Mari.

686

:

Like, we'll just start in prayer.

687

:

And then I just ask like, how many

fire we thank you for a daughter, Mari.

688

:

I just pray that.

689

:

Yeah.

690

:

You give her peace and you send

the spirit of peace upon her.

691

:

Pray that you make your will known

to her so that she doesn't feel lost.

692

:

I pray that you give her the grace

to respond to the ways that you're

693

:

calling her to live in this life.

694

:

Uh, we ask that you just overwhelm

her with a desire and love for you

695

:

so that she can enter in her prayer.

696

:

I pray you remove any apathy, like Holy

spirit in the name of Jesus Christ.

697

:

Reveal the lie that she's unloved or

that, uh, prayer is not important.

698

:

Amen.

699

:

If there's any lines that are coming up,

like Mari can share those and then we can

700

:

rebuke those in the name of Jesus Christ.

701

:

And then like we end in prayer, like

praise and Thanksgiving where we love you.

702

:

Thank you for the graces

you've bestowed upon us.

703

:

Like we thank you for this time of prayer.

704

:

Sometimes we'll like end with

praying a Hail Mary, inviting

705

:

Mary to intercede for us as well.

706

:

Yeah.

707

:

So that's a, like, that's the, uh, the

next layer is more intimate, but it's

708

:

where we should all aspire to go to.

709

:

I don't.

710

:

The, the easy ways praying before

meals, praying, uh, when you travel,

711

:

praying with scripture, like those

are all like, we babysit, you're

712

:

stepping in this direction, but like,

I would encourage you that don't

713

:

settle for just praying before meals.

714

:

Pray with scripture.

715

:

Work your way.

716

:

Yeah.

717

:

Pray the rosary.

718

:

Work your way up.

719

:

Pray.

720

:

Intercessory prayer guy,

like all together routinely.

721

:

And then, and then even like when you have

a family and you have children, like teach

722

:

your children, model it for your children.

723

:

I saw this one video once too.

724

:

And maybe that's where we saw the whole,

like the couple praying with coffee

725

:

and Bible scripture in the morning.

726

:

I think like the line was like, we

do this every morning for ourselves,

727

:

but we also do it for our children.

728

:

Like we want our children to grow up

seeing a marriage that is centered

729

:

in God and is rooted in prayer.

730

:

And so.

731

:

Working it into your relationship, not

only blesses you and your marriage,

732

:

but will bless your children and

their future marriages as well.

733

:

I mean, they'll grow up seeing, they'll

grow up seeing a husband and wife

734

:

that are rooted in prayer and go to

each other in prayer and have that

735

:

level of intimacy in their faith.

736

:

And they are, they'll be wanting

to seek that hopefully within their

737

:

marriage, their future marriage as well.

738

:

And so, um, you can pray with your kids

then too, and kind of model it for them.

739

:

Yeah, I hope this was helpful.

740

:

And just know that like your significant

other, while it's awkward and while it's

741

:

difficult to start, it will get better.

742

:

It will get better.

743

:

It's, you know, the momentum.

744

:

Like once you start and you start

doing it, and you start doing it, then

745

:

it'll get easier and easier and easier.

746

:

Um, and like they're not gonna judge you.

747

:

Like they're probably feeling awkward too.

748

:

And they're going to be super,

like, they're going to admire

749

:

you and respect you a ton to put

yourself out there and try it.

750

:

Um, so just honestly,

just get over yourselves.

751

:

This is important.

752

:

And just do it.

753

:

Yeah.

754

:

Do you want to close in prayer, Mari?

755

:

Anything else you want to add?

756

:

No.

757

:

I mean, there's so many other ways

to, I know I started the podcast

758

:

saying like, we're going to talk about

different ways to incorporate faith

759

:

into your marriage, but honestly,

the foundational thing is prayer.

760

:

And that's where we're really here

to talk about, but we're going

761

:

to have to do a part two of like

other ways to incorporate faith.

762

:

Cause it's.

763

:

Uh, just a God centered marriage is, is

such a blessing is so fruitful to your

764

:

life and to the world and is so necessary.

765

:

So we need to keep the conversation

going, but we got to wrap up because

766

:

we actually got to get to mass.

767

:

So let's close in prayer.

768

:

In the name of the

father, son, Holy spirit.

769

:

Amen.

770

:

Come Holy spirit.

771

:

Lord, we thank you for this, uh, time

together of Trey and I being able to

772

:

talk about prayer with each other.

773

:

Um, thank you for this time with our

listeners who are learning about how to

774

:

incorporate you and prayer into their

life more, into their relationship more.

775

:

Um, we pray for good and holy marriages.

776

:

We pray for, um, people to desire to

include you in their relationship even

777

:

more into their marriage even more and

for them to root themselves in you.

778

:

Um, we pray for our listeners for you to

give them a spirit of courage, um, and

779

:

zeal, uh, in their faith and for them

to be able to take that first step and

780

:

bring it up to their spouse and say,

Hey, I really think we should do this.

781

:

And we pray for the spouse or the

significant other to have an openness in

782

:

their heart to enter into prayer together.

783

:

And we ask this all in your

most holy name, Jesus Christ.

784

:

And we ask for the intercession

of your mother as we pray.

785

:

Hail Mary, full of grace.

786

:

The Lord is with thee.

787

:

Blessed art thou among women and

blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.

788

:

Holy Mary, mother of God, pray for us

sinners now and at the hour of our death.

789

:

Amen.

790

:

In the father, son, Holy spirit.

791

:

Amen.

792

:

Thanks guys.

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