Shownotes
From Mess to Success: "It's your journey from mess to success. That is a huge leadership tool that you can use to inspire others and also understand your own story." - Judy Carter
I have the absolute pleasure of sitting down with the incredible Judy Carter. Judy is not only a trailblazing comedian and author, but she’s also our keynote speaker for the upcoming Brady Ware Women’s Leadership Conference.
Judy’s journey is fascinating—from breaking into the male-dominated world of stand-up comedy to building her unique message that our “mess” can become our greatest source of success and leadership. Judy opens up about how humor, authenticity, and honest storytelling are powerful tools for any woman striving to make a difference, whether in her career, business, or community.
Judy talks about turning stress into strength, using your stories to connect with others, and how vulnerability is a superpower. Judy shares practical exercises and a fresh perspective on leading with laughter, resilience, and what it means to own every part of your journey—mess and all.
If you’re looking for inspiration, a few laughs, and real strategies to help you stand out and connect as a leader, you’re in the right place. Let’s dive in and discover together how your story can become your most powerful tool for leadership and impact.
2025 Women's Leadership Conference
Inspiring Moments
00:00 Comedian's Journey in Male Industry
06:56 Coaching CEOs for Engaging Speeches
09:20 "Leader's Relatable Transformation Inspires Team"
13:43 The Turning Point: Hopelessness Origins
14:28 "Defining Resolve and New Purpose"
20:31 "Comedy Techniques & Success Stories"
21:24 Agenda: Balancing Serious and Light
33:01 "Embrace Your Messy Success"
37:18 "Facing Reality with Optimism"
37:46 "Resilient Amid Chaos"
Here are my top 3 takeaways you can put into action right now:
Your story matters – Don’t underestimate the power of sharing your journey, including the tough moments. Your mess isn’t weakness—it’s your message, and people relate far more to your challenges than your titles.
Lead with humor and authenticity – Humor isn’t just for the stage; it builds connection and resilience. Judy shared practical ways to bring lightness (and even laughter) to stressful situations—and how that actually makes us stronger leaders.
Own your vulnerabilities – Being honest about stress and setbacks makes you relatable and trustworthy. Judy urges us to answer “How are you?” with realness (and maybe a little comic relief!) to create a culture of transparency and positivity.
Forward our podcast along to other Inspiring Women in your life.
This is THE podcast that advances women toward economic, social, and political achievement.
Hosted by Betty Collins, CPA, and Director at Brady Ware and Company. Betty also serves as the Committee Chair for Empowering Women, and Director of the Brady Ware Women’s Initiative.
Each episode is presented by Brady Ware and Company, committed to empowering women to go their distance in the workplace and at home.
For more information, Brady Ware and Company.
Remember to follow this podcast on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. And forward our podcast along to other Inspiring Women in your life.
Brady Ware and Company
Transcripts
Has anyone ever inspired you to create a more fulfilling and successful life for yourself as a leader in your business and in your community? What are the questions that you ask yourself on a daily basis? What are the questions that keep you up at night? I am your host, Betty Collins. I am a cpa. I'm a business owner, and I partner with other women, other business owners who want to have remarkable results for themselves and for their business and their community. And I'm here to help inspire you to take positive steps forward for a better life. So over the next 12 episodes and kind of this season, we're going to focus on lessons learned. We're going to hear from other women who have learned lessons and they're going to share with you.
Betty Collins [:You know why?
Betty Collins [:Because it's the right thing to do to help you navigate maybe similar situations that you're in and you don't have to go through what they've gone through. And I hope to challeng you that you have lessons learned in your journey that other women need to hear. Never underestimate that part of your life and that story because it will have impact. In my opinion, we're obligated to share those life lessons. In my opinion, we have a responsibility to each other, woman to woman or women to men. But I really believe what we've learned in our lessons over our journey are impactful and they need to be part of how you give back and how you help others.
Betty Collins [:Well, today I have the privilege on inspiring women to talk with Judy Carter. And she's got a she's going to be our keynote speaker at the Brady Ware Women's Leadership Conference for '25 in a couple of weeks, actually. And she is a comedian and yet has just the perfect messages for women. And I'll let her tell a little bit about her, but we're going to talk today just about the, her perspective, how she, how she gets through life in stress and how she's a storyteller and she's just a lot of fun. So I think if you, if you hear this before June 18th, that is the conference. We still have some tickets we can sell. It's going to be her at noon. We have breakouts.
Betty Collins [:We have all kinds of stuff that goes on. But as you know, I've been doing podcasting for, for several years, and we just love having women who can come and talk and inspire other women. And I think that you're going to find that with Judy Carter today. So, Judy, the first thing we're going to do is, of course, I Don't read bios because I don't do it justice. I really just want you to talk a few minutes about who you are and kind of how you've come along in this, you know, as a speaker and comedy and inspiring women, the whole gamut. You have the floor, Judy Carter.
Judy Carter [:Well, I, I, some people might wonder, why did the Women's Leadership Conference hire a comedian to talk to them? And I just want to say that I started comedy in the most male dominated industry and, and I have successfully made a living in an industry as very times. I was like the only standup comedy. When I did my HBO special, I was introduced as ladies and gentlemen, our next comics has she's got big tits. And I mean, I started comedy before there was hr. Okay, There was no hr. If you didn't sleep with some people, you would not even get booked. It was, it was nasty out there and I've been literally thrown out of places. I was one of the first female magicians performing the Magic House when I was 21.
Judy Carter [:And I was actually picked up and tossed into the parking lot where a big Italian magician said, hey you, you don't belong here. Women don't belong. Stick to bunnies and rabbits. But, you know, card tricks are for men. And I'm going, why? Because they're so cards, they're so heavy. What are you talking about? And so I have a very important message. What I realized is that how did I go from dealing in such an arduous industry to end up here? First of all, still working at my age, okay. As well as owning an apartment building, owning a $4 million home in Venice beach, from doing what I love.
Judy Carter [:So I realized that the messes in my life actually created my successes. So when I talk to the women, I want to tell them that they have a very important leadership tool that will help them inspire staff and connect with clients. And it doesn't mean just talking about the acronyms after your name. The fact that you're a coo, a cfo, doesn't mean you're a bfd. It's your journey from mess to success. That is a huge leadership tool that you can use to inspire others and also understand your own story. We all need to understand our origin story. And it isn't where you landed.
Judy Carter [:It's, it's the journey. And every, every woman has one of what did you have to overcome? And very often it's in the word. Like, I have a copy of my book in front of me. The message of you, it's in the Word itself, message. You can't spell it without the first four letters. You can spell message without a mess. And so when we have painful times in our life, we tend to don't want to remember them, don't want to think about them, but the truth is creates. You can't have a message without a mess.
Betty Collins [:Right. So how do you think today? You know, why is it especially important for women in leadership today, you know, to be inspired by this message? Like, what, what. How does it help them when they're in leadership, to think in your mindset?
Judy Carter [:Well, I coach a lot of CEOs because they have to give speeches and they don't want to bore people to death, which they inevitably do. So they'll come to me and they. I want to be funnier, you know, and yeah, I can, I can write them, you know, some jokes to, to make them funnier. But, but When I coach CEOs, I asked them this question. When was there a time in your life when all doors closed to you when, when you just like, hit bottom, right? And they inevitably, especially if they're men, say to me, I haven't had any. I don't remember. And, but then I'll pursue it. And I kind of intuitive and I go, and I'll be very.
Judy Carter [:What happened to you in high school? Something horrible happened to you. What was it? Just like, yell at them.
Betty Collins [:Yeah, yeah.
Judy Carter [:What happened? And so this guy told me this. He just went like, oh, yeah, I forgot. Because we don't remember these things unless we pursue them and they're worth pursuing because they will give you a very important leadership tool, which is the message of you. And so he remembered, and what it was, was that he was all ready to a. A football scholarship. And then he went and he saw his name wasn't on the list, and he went, what? And he went into the coach and he went, this is impossible. I'm, I'm. I was going to.
Judy Carter [:I was said to, you know, it must be some mistake. And the coach said, no, there are other people more deserving, more, better than you. Sorry. I'm really sorry. And then he got belligerent and a door literally closed in his face, you know.
Betty Collins [:Right.
Judy Carter [:And, and, and what happened was his whole future was derailed by this. So his family got together, he got a, you know, some menial job. He went to a junior college. He doesn't have any of this on his resume. And then what he did was when he got a sales job, he had to work extra hard because it just for. And finally he Got to a position of being CEO of a tech sales company. And when he told this story, he was very reluctant because he thought it might make him look weak.
Betty Collins [:Right.
Judy Carter [:But the truth is, afterwards, employees came up. People who've known him for so long said, I didn't know that about you. It made him human, it made him relatable, and it also gave him a message to. To give to his employees. So I know more than anybody when a door closes in your face from a client, from a sales. Whatever it is, there is an opportunity. There's a window that opens, and you've got to go through it and never give up. And all of a sudden, he became inspiration for his sales staff because, you know, just.
Judy Carter [:Just like the woman I spoke with, she graduated from Harvard. And that's, like, impressive. Yeah. But it puts you up on a pedestal to be knocked down. But when you say, I went from being homeless to going to Harvard now, now you are a leader worth listening to. It gives you value. And I think it's so important. I mean, every company does this has their origin story, like Microsoft, you know, well, we started in a garage.
Judy Carter [:We didn't even have an office. Now we sell office, you know, So I think. I think this. This story that everybody needs to know about themselves is a phenomenal leadership tool.
Betty Collins [:You know, people don't value this story right? In the way that they. Well, when I say that, they just think it's their story. Big deal. I know for myself, when I started the Women's Initiative and we had our first day where it was just the women of Brady, where it's usually day one, day two is the community. And so I thought, well, I don't really know these women. I'm just coming to Brady Wear. I'm the only shareholder that's a woman. I'm supposed to lead an initiative.
Betty Collins [:Okay. And so I thought, okay, I'm just going to tell them my career. That's how I looked at it. Here's. Here's what I did. And what was so interesting was they listened like they were tuned in, because I did. It was my story. And I just thought it was what everyone did.
Betty Collins [:Right. Yet I'm the only woman in that room that's in the boardroom. And they looked at that as this. So this is how you got there, and these are the things that you did. And I'm not making this about me, but it was. I learned in that moment the power of my story. And it's one reason why I do a podcast, too, is because I think These things are the everyday, normal stuff. It's like, no, this is like, you don't understand.
Betty Collins [:I kind of have the same story. Let me tell mine. And so, so how do you get people to, when you coach them to write the story or tell the story? I mean, do you have anything that you do specifically to get them to think about it so that it's effective and impactful?
Judy Carter [:Well, I'm, I'm more when, when I coach people, I could tell when. Nah, that's not your story. You know, you gotta hang nailed. Nah, no, that's not your starting point. You know, everybody knows you're ending that point. Yeah, but. But there is an intuitiveness of where it emotionally grabs, you know, of something that. And it, and it so helps somebody find.
Judy Carter [:Find what? Their success. Like sometimes you don't have success, but you, if you understand what drives you, you can then create a future from that. For instance, I was talking. People come to me, they want to be funnier. And, and I can do that. I'm an idiot savant at writing jokes. Give me a topic. I can funny.
Judy Carter [:But I think there's something deeper than that, and that is that they're messed to success. Origin story. And so I was talking to this woman and she was speaking at libraries. She. She wanted to get more clients as an accountant, okay, Accountant, she wants more clients. So she thought she'd do some free speeches for the community on, you know, how to manage money and what have you. And so she had her PowerPoint and she had her graphs and kind of death by PowerPoint just so boring. You wanted to poke your eyes out with a pencil.
Judy Carter [:And it just wasn't working. It just was not working. So she came to me and I asked her this question, what happened? And it was usually when you're about 8, I find around that time where something happens to you, where you go, I never want to feel this again, this hopeless. I never want to feel this hopeless again. And her time was her father had died and her mother, he handled. Her father handled all the finances. And her mother had no idea about anything about money and didn't have the passwords or account, nothing. And so they ended up homeless.
Judy Carter [:And it was this moment of her living in a car with her mother where. And this is the moment that happens to all of us at that age. We go, I never want to feel this way again. I will never feel this way again. We make this promise to ourselves, which is so surprising to me that we forget about it. But, you know, it's just us making A promise to ourselves, you know, but I will never feel like this again. And anyway, she then started telling that story, and she realized her real passion was helping women whose husbands have died. So she narrowed.
Judy Carter [:She niched her. Her accounting business to specifically women making that transition to taking care of their financials and being independent and knowing how to do it. Well, last time I talked, she got. Next time she spoke and she told this story. Well, what happened to me as a child, I don't want to happen to anyone. Now when she says that, I know I'm going to be hiring an accountant who really cares about me, I mean. Right. Like it.
Judy Carter [:All of a sudden, she's got my heart and she's got my business because it's so passionate. Of course, you. You know, you've got to believe her. Well, last time I checked with her, she had to hire five additional staff members. I said, I called her up and I said, hey, you know, I called her up a year later, are you still speaking? And she goes, no, I can't, because everybody wants to hire me.
Betty Collins [:Right. And with an event that turned into.
Judy Carter [:Right, that's a good story. To show the power of a story to garnish accounts, clients become a power of inspiration for other people. And to do that is. Is revealing of your own mess. To success. Success.
Betty Collins [:Right.
Judy Carter [:Sorry.
Betty Collins [:It's. It's. I always try to come up with examples in my mind, but I love watching movies about the Kennedys. Don't know why, just do. Jack and Jackie Kennedy to me were so intriguing. Just the whole thing. I don't know why, but there was a moment where his. His dad was having him run for office, and he's up there saying all the right things and kind of blah, blah, and he's sitting with a bunch of mothers who have lost their sons, right? And he's not resonating whatsoever with the audience until he.
Betty Collins [:Till he says, you know, I'm paraphrasing, but. But we know what it's like every day. There's a memory every day, and we see it every day. And he starts talking about what his own mother went through as a. As basically so, you know, who had lost her son. He. It was impulse. It was not in the speech, but he could see it.
Betty Collins [:And all of a sudden, the more he talked, the more they listened. And then it resonated and something clicked. And I don't. I think we just underestimate those things because we think that, yeah, my brother died, and it was war, My mom's hurting, yet he's talking to a bunch of moms. And then he realizes, oh, and he starts telling this story and he captures the audience and you just have to. It's why I love reels on Facebook, right?
Judy Carter [:Yes, absolutely.
Betty Collins [:30 second glimpses of people's lives and all of a sudden, you know, they got a million people following them because they're just telling their story what they're doing every day or they're, they're talking about what, what people relate to.
Judy Carter [:Yes, absolutely. Absolutely.
Betty Collins [:And their mess is becoming your mess and you're all in it together. Right.
Judy Carter [:I love, I am addicted to Tick tock, I have to say. And you know, but don't find the.
Betty Collins [:Story the part you love. And then they doctor it up with humor or not. Or they just tell, you know, they're telling and then all of a sudden they're resonating with thousands of people.
Judy Carter [:Yes. Business now is authenticity and, and especially on social media that's so important. And you can't. I, I once had somebody call me up that they wanted to meet a ghost, write a book for them on the power of authenticity. I went, I think you're missing the point.
Betty Collins [:Yeah, yeah. That's kind of a, not a contradiction, is it or not? But, but you know, so I love the fact you take your stress, it's a laughing matter and turn that mess into success. So talk about humor. How powerful of a tool that is, especially with leadership. Right. And on how you just, you don't just cope with stress, but you actually lead with authenticity and resilience because of it. But humor plays all in that. So let's talk about.
Judy Carter [:There's a lot of words in that resilience and leadership and humor.
Betty Collins [:Authenticity.
Judy Carter [:Authenticity. Well, as, as far as when you speak to people, you gotta be funny because otherwise you're putting people to sleep. And it's so much easier to be funny now like with emails, like emails that have a likeness and a sense of humor about them. Get read. So let's start right there. And I gotta say chat GPT. Put your email in there and say hey, can you punch it up? A little levity here? So you could even use that if you are humor impatient. So that has become very easy to do.
Judy Carter [:So there, there are a lot of techniques. I'm going to be teaching some of these techniques when I go to the conference. There's some comedy techniques that in my book, the, the New Comedy Bible, there are some things that just make people laugh and they're actually formulas that you can have. Like if you want a career in Standup comedy. I ran comedy workshops and my students have included so many comedians are very successful, started my workshop, including like Seth Rogen and wow. Joe Brownie and Sherri shepherd and so many of the comedians happening, happening. Now Taylor Tomlinson talked about, you know, how she carries the comedy bible with her, which is, you know, I'm thrilled about because, because there are certain formulas. One is called the list of three.
Judy Carter [:So if you have a meeting and an agenda and you're saying, okay, here are the three things that we are going. Serious things that we have to discuss about, you know, in the agenda. And the first two can be, you know, increasing our roi. The next one is working on our profit margins. And then the third one, because the first two are serious, should be funny. Like never have a list where the third one isn't funny. And how we can make the microwave not so disgusting, you know, you know, the office micro. So like if you set up something like there are three subtle clues that, you know, your relationship, you know, is, is in trouble, you're not kissing as much, no love letters.
Judy Carter [:Three subtle clothes, no not kissing, no love letters. And the third one like needs to be the funny one. So if you start on a pattern and it's something called the turn. So the third one, and he's issued a restraining order and has moved in with his new wife, you know, like subtle clues. So it becomes funny. So anytime you give a list of things. So what does this do? Why do we need humor? It's because it makes, wakes people up. You know, we live in a very serious world right now.
Judy Carter [:And, and any levity and humor and laughter is, is essential because people are so stressed and when you laugh at a problem, it becomes more manageable. So when something so serious, it's like it becomes hard to tackle, right? So you know, that's, to me the most important thing is, is to wake people up, keep them, keep their attention and add some love, add some friggin humor to what you have to talk about so people listen.
Betty Collins [:Always led with humor. But when I try to be funny, I'm not when I say things. But this was my one line that anytime I speak, people always laugh at. And I don't know why, but I'll say I've done accounting since 1988, okay? Everyone loves that line. I don't know why that line always draws it. It just, they always think in the year of our Lord, you know, I don't know what it is. You've done accounting since 1988, so it's kind of like they always res. I don't know why they think that's funny.
Betty Collins [:I did it yesterday in something and they were just. They all laugh now. They were accountants yesterday, so I get that they would laugh. You find those one liners. And then when I. Yeah.
Judy Carter [:There's so much you could do with accountants, you know. You know, there's like these formulas like cp. I'm a cpa. That means I'm constantly punched in the abs. You know, it's like you could take a neck. It's like what it is. What, what comedy is, is something we all need to do is do something different.
Betty Collins [:Yeah.
Judy Carter [:And do something which isn't. Anyway.
Betty Collins [:Well. And it's why my up and coming. If I. If she ever comes to my town is Leanne Morgan. Do you.
Judy Carter [:I love her. She's hilarious.
Betty Collins [:And again, it's always a story. It's all. And she's serious. And then she probably takes your advice of. I got two serious things. Now. Here's my punchline. I don't know.
Betty Collins [:But she's really good at the story humor. And then getting her point across. Of what? Of what we relate to every day as women.
Judy Carter [:I also think it's a leadership tool for women to make fun of themselves. You know, that's such a power play. Make fun of yourself before other people do. Or if people are joking about you behind your back, you know, just call it out and own it yourself. Yeah. Hey, it's me. Good morning. Your micromanager.
Judy Carter [:Woohoo.
Betty Collins [:Right? I'm terrible.
Judy Carter [:Another day of me micromanaging everybody, you know, and then it's something that people already think about you. It's funny. And you've. And you've dominated the narrative about it.
Betty Collins [:So let me ask you this, because many women who are leaders, maybe they're not leaders. They're just part of the team. It doesn't really matter. But they carry this invisible stress while they're trying to appear very composed. Life is good. I have no problems. I'm the perfect Facebook, you know, like my life, all those things. But they're.
Betty Collins [:They really are carrying that invisible stress. Us. Yeah. What's. What's your advice for embracing. You know, you're gonna be very vulnerable without feeling weak, you know.
Judy Carter [:Ah. Next time someone says, hello, how are you? Tell them the truth. Do something other than fine, bad hair day, and then add this word woohoo after it. It just is funny.
Betty Collins [:Yeah.
Judy Carter [:You know, if anytime you do something out of the ordinary. So stop lying. You know, hello, how are you? Completely aggravated and sick of B.S.
Betty Collins [:Yes.
Judy Carter [:You know, it's just like, it's such an opportunity because comedy is doing something different now. Very few people. Everybody's so scared about how they look, and so doing something different becomes scary. Act of courage. And. And everybody wants to play it safe. Hello. How are you? Fine, I'm good.
Judy Carter [:And you? And that's so freaking boring.
Betty Collins [:So.
Judy Carter [:So to me, everybody has an opportunity every day to make fun of themselves by answering that question honestly. And it's a small thing, but it's such a game changer. And it just brightens up the office, and everybody else starts doing it, and then it becomes a thing, and then it becomes fun, and then all of a sudden, you know, you've made the work day a little easier.
Betty Collins [:Well, and other people are stealing your line now, right? They're saying, oh, you know, my dad always used to. You'd say, dad, how you doing today? He goes, nobody's told me. I have no idea. He knew he had a memory problem. He had. He had kind of that dementia onset. Nobody's told me. We always laughed about it instead of trying to figure out what he was it.
Betty Collins [:Was he good, was he not. Yeah, I'm above the grass. Above the grass is better than below the grass. You know, he always had those one liners. And to this day, the third and fourth generation say those one liners, you know, but yeah, to want to always put our stress inward or not let anyone see a sweat. And I think it. When you lead or you want people to follow, those are two different things. But when you want to lead, you want people to follow.
Betty Collins [:I think being more vulnerable with it. And you don't have to tell your, you know, entire life story. Right. You don't have to let them know.
Judy Carter [:It's just, it's, it's, it's. It. I think it's just making a little bit of an effort to lighten things up, you know, it's really, it's really that small. It's not a. To me, a. A big thing. It's something I do naturally.
Betty Collins [:Yeah.
Judy Carter [:I feel every time I tell, you know, if I'm at the store, someone says, you know, and, you know, for some reason they need your phone number. Oh, you know, I need to validate what's your phone number? And I go, oh, I'm sorry. I'm already involved with somebody, you know, and they go, what? And it kind of breaks them out of their. Their ennui, you know, and their robot. And it just, it creates moments.
Betty Collins [:Right.
Judy Carter [:And isn't that what great, a great life is about, having those moments.
Betty Collins [:Well, and I don't think people realize the invisible stress of not just being more transparent or authentic or just throwing it out there to see if anyone catches what you're throwing. I mean I think that's so true.
Judy Carter [:I love that.
Betty Collins [:Yes.
Judy Carter [:I love, you know, to me that's, that is when I know I'm with a like minded person. They throw the ball back like you toss it out. Have you ever done that, Betty? Toss the ball out and you say something funny and they don't get it and they don't toss it and just lands and it's like oh yeah, they don't get me.
Betty Collins [:Well, I mean, you know, you don't, I don't think we realize the amount of stress. I mean we live especially since 2020. I don't want to go back there. But we've lived under a lot of stress and what ifs and a lot of things have changed with you can't see, you want to say maybe or you're gotta hide over here or it's just best that I leave it alone. And we've, we've totally taken on stress to our physical and mental health. That man, if you don't, if you don't start using some type of transparent or humor or you know, take the mess and make, turn it into success, man, I, I mean it's, it's hard on you. And I think as a woman we carry a lot. Men can kind of go like this, you just, it just over the head, nobody cares.
Betty Collins [:I'm good. They, they do it differently but women don't. And then they take a lot. You know, you can take things, I take things very personal at times and then other times I'm like whatever, you know, but I still don't want to hold that in. But, but good advice on hey, throw it back out there, see what happens. But you know, for you, what's one practical takeaway or like a mindset shift from your, from the keynote that women can start using immediately and turn that stress into strength. What's something they can do before the conference? Then they come into conference and go I've done this, I've turned stress into.
Judy Carter [:I want people to try that exercise about a. Hello, how are you? Yeah, aggravated. Woohoo.
Betty Collins [:Hello.
Judy Carter [:Because if you don't do the woohoo, it's complaining, I'm aggravated, it's not funny. Woohoo. It's like celebrating the negative. Which is, which is I'm a comic and I think Counterintuitively, like, everything bad that happens to me, you know, I'm going like, it's material. That's why I teach people. You're not in a miserable marriage. It's comedy material. You know your boss from hell.
Judy Carter [:No, it's a heckler. There's nothing you can't turn into humor with that little thing. So next time someone says, hello, how are you? You tell them that I'm. I'm. I'm aggravated, and I've got sciatica.
Betty Collins [:Usually that's my life. Yeah.
Judy Carter [:With energy. And you do that, and it's. And it's. And you move on. And it's a little. People go, judy, that's. That's a little cookie, isn't it? Yeah, it is, but so is the world. And we could use.
Judy Carter [:We could all use a little lightning now, because you have a choice. You can get stressed out and drink, or you can laugh and drink. You can always drink, is the point.
Betty Collins [:Yeah, you can just. We start with mess, we end with drink. Okay. Yeah, but, you know, when you talk with women or you're, you know, you're doing comedy, or maybe you're doing comedy slash leadership, whatever the topic is, you know, what is it that you want them to walk away with a lot of times, emotionally and practically?
Judy Carter [:I want them to walk away with owning their entire life story and not eradicating the mess, because I want to show them that they have success in their life because of that mess. And it is that mess that led them to success and gives them an incredible origin story that they can use when they talk, that they can use on their website that they can use to make themselves memorable, connect with clients, connect with staff, and inspire people.
Betty Collins [:Yep. Well, that was good.
Judy Carter [:That was like. That was almost like I was a motivational speaker or something. That was amazing.
Betty Collins [:But see, you're ending with humor, which is. I mean, you're ending. You're still following up with humor, which is what we. We got to do more of, especially in today's world and in the environments that we're in. What is the one piece of advice, you know, or a mantra that you would. That's helped you rise to new heights? You know, how would you share that with others seeking to do the same thing?
Judy Carter [:Mantra. Well, I have a mantra, a very specific mantra where I've picked three words that I can put on like a coat, because, you know, as a comedian, I'm. I'm not feeling. I have to perform and be funny when I'm not feeling funny. You know, something Just happened. I'm going through a breakup. My mom died. Oh, you're on.
Judy Carter [:And what do I do? What do I do? Well, I put on this phrase like I would put on a coat. Just put it on. And then I go forward. And what I'd say is, no matter where I'm at, I am the possibility of spontaneity, playfulness and freedom. And that's who I am. And ladies and gentlemen, Judy Carter. Bam. And that's.
Judy Carter [:I can say that even if I'm not feeling it, because I am always the possibility of spontaneity, playfulness and freedom. And those are words that mean something for myself. I don't know what your words are. I don't know what anybody else's words are, but I think of Tamiya's performance as a freedom to share, to give freedom to other people. And I'm so excited to be in Ohio. I never thought words. I would never say Ohio, Ohio. It's in some place called Dublin or something.
Judy Carter [:Where. Where am I going?
Betty Collins [:It is going to be Columbus area. It's called the Quest center at Polaris.
Judy Carter [:So the Quest Center. Polaris sounds like a freaking spaceship. I'm going, I don't know.
Betty Collins [:It's a spaceship.
Judy Carter [:Polaris.
Betty Collins [:You know, I, I like. I'll have to talk to you more when you're here. Of the three words like putting on a coat and that's your. My mom's mantra would always be, she had six kids in five years and, and there were days, you know, she didn't feel like it for sure. She had two sets of twins, so she had a, a handful of kids immediately. And then we all left home immediately. I don't know what was harder for her. I mean, all six of us in five years or all four.
Betty Collins [:All six of us leave it over a four year time period, right? But she always would say, false cheer, it's just better than real crabbiness on and get in the van, we're going to church. Act like it. You know, she was just. She always used that mantra, get over it. In other words, right? Put your smiles on false tears. Better than real crime and let's go.
Judy Carter [:And are you in therapy now because of that?
Betty Collins [:I'm not.
Judy Carter [:I don't know if I want my mother. Get over it.
Betty Collins [:You know, the reason I, the reason I go back to that saying with her is because no matter what it. It was, now there's two sides to that saying, right? The first side to me was, we're going to just go have a good time. And, and you're going to jump in and you're going to go and you're.
Judy Carter [:Gonna, mom, I broke my leg.
Betty Collins [:Right? Yeah. I don't think she would say false year is better than her comments, but she always made you like, it's, it just made you feel like, yeah, okay, everyone, let's just go. We're here. We're gonna do it, we're gonna enjoy it. Whether it's getting in the van and going to church or whatever it was. Now the other side of that honestly was you can't, you can't put everything under the carpet. You know, you can't just sweep it under the carpet and now and go, oh, the carpet's clean. Because the top.
Betty Collins [:You know what I mean? That's the part you're going. And that's where My family didn't do well over the years because it was like you just went forth whether you liked it or not or. So there's two sides here. But I always liked her resilience with that because she had such chaos. She had six kids that had to get out the door in the van to church. Search. Put your smiles on if we're going to do this. So she was kind of, kind of that person.
Judy Carter [:Six kids and they didn't probably back then have medication.
Betty Collins [:They did not know.
Judy Carter [:Yeah. Six kids without meds. Now that's an accomplishment.
Betty Collins [:Well, and she had all cloth diaper. Okay. And we would.
Judy Carter [:And cloth diapers. Oh my God.
Betty Collins [:Oh, geez. I can't even imagine it. And. But she said, you know, life was so different then because you didn't have everyone in three sports, you didn't go to every school event. You didn't. I mean it was just, just everything was so family based and you came home and you changed from school and everybody played on the street and you know, you just, that was how life was. It was a totally different time. But it didn't mean she didn't have stress, that's for sure.
Betty Collins [:Her, her stress, certainly her mess was very messy. But. And she didn't use humor all the time. But I think in today's world we need more of that and we need to quit being so, oh, I better not say that or oh, you know, just be yourself. Right. But I love the fact the new comedy Bible. I'm gonna have to get that. I' mean, I'm not a comedian.
Betty Collins [:I can be funny, but I'm not a comedian. But turning stressed. Taking that story in your mind, we'll close with this question. What's first? The story or the humor or the mess? Is there. I guess. Is there an order? I don't know.
Judy Carter [:I have no idea what came first, the chicken or the egg? We haven't even figured that one out. How are we gonna figure what came first? The story? The humor at first? Doesn't the Bible start first? There was a joke. I think that's how it starts at first.
Betty Collins [:Definitely would say that's true.
Judy Carter [:And God said, let there be laughter. I think that's. That's how it starts.
Betty Collins [:I think that's how it went. Okay, well, we'll figure it out between now and then, because I'm a cpa. I'll get this all in order for you.
Judy Carter [:Okay, excellent.
Betty Collins [:Now, this is very, very nice to meet you. I've heard so many good things about you. Definitely. When we were looking for a speaker, you stood out amongst everyone, for sure.
Judy Carter [:O wonderful.
Betty Collins [:We're excited that you're excited. Yeah. So today we end with Judy Carter. And if you have a mess or you have a story or you have humor, it doesn't matter the order. Figure out the. Figure out those components and put it all together right? And live a little freer and live a little better and do it with humor. We need that today. Thank you for joining us.
Betty Collins [:More about inspiring women can be found on BradyWare.com, apple Podcasts, and Spotify. Thank you for listening.
