What if you approached life, at all of its various stages of aging, with intentional curiosity? What if you never stopped learning, and as a result, you have so much to gain? Today's guest, Martha Burich, has this intentional mindset that she describes for us in a way that examines the unlimited possibilities (and potential) that we all have. Ultimately, it allows us to ask two questions: What will help you to enjoy life, and, what can we do to help others in their biggest time of need? No matter what kind of background you have, and what kind of education you have received, having the right mindset by exploring what you have to gain can drive you to unlimited, unbridled potential within ourselves and with each other. Failure is only one step in the overall process of becoming a much better person as a whole.
Guest Bio
Martha is the Founder of Martha Burich Consulting where she is a speaker, author, and mindset coach. She helps people overcome the thinking and behaviors that are keeping them from the relationships, success and peace of mind they want. She is a contributing author to Chicken Soup for the Soul Cookbook; contributor to the book: Practical Happiness by Pamela Gail Johnson. Martha is a retired college Professor of Psychology and also a retired high school Science and Math teacher. She has been leading Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) meetings in the local jail for the women for over a year.
Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100008384346047
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Website: https://marthaburich.com
For a full listing of other links, visit Martha's Linktree at the following link: https://linktr.ee/marthaburich.
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Intro/Outro By: Michael Dugan, Podcast Host: Voice4Chefs
Welcome to the podcast where relationships, confidence, and
2
:determination all converge into
an amazing, heartfelt experience.
3
:This is Speaking From The Heart.
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:Joshua: Welcome back to episode
number 88 of Speaking from the Heart.
5
:Today we have Martha Burich joining
us, and Martha is the founder of Martha
6
:Burich Consulting, where she is a
speaker, author, and mindset coach.
7
:She helps people overcome the thinking
and behaviors that are keeping them
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:from their relationships, success,
and peace of mind that they want.
9
:She's been a contributing author to
the Chicken Soup For The Soul cookbook,
10
:contributor to the book Practical
Happiness by Pamela Gayle Johnson, and
11
:Martha is a retired college professor
of psychology and also a retired
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:high school science and math teacher.
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:All these things have enabled her to
lead Alcoholics Anonymous meetings at
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:the local jail where she volunteers
at for women for over a year.
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:I have to say that Martha's story
in itself was something that was
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:really interesting to me from why
she jumped from one place to another,
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:but at the same time, it really
helped me to understand why some
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:people are never settling for less.
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:I think that we have this opportunity
to get so little but give so much in
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:our lives, and it can be as simple as
drawing a fish, which we talk about
21
:in this episode, to what are some of
the biggest things that we can help
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:others in their greatest time of need.
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:I know for myself that as a coach and
somebody that has gone through the gambit
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:of a variety of different situations,
sometimes just having that person to lean
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:on, no matter what kind of jack of trade
that they have, can create some of those
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:best opportunities in our lives, not only
to just see what's on the other side,
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:not just see what we can be able to do,
but to see that there is hope that on the
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:other side, we have that opportunity to
develop ourselves in some amazing ways.
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:But with that, let's go to the episode.
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:All right, we're here with Martha Burich.
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:Martha, thanks for sharing
your heart with us today.
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:Martha: Oh, I'm happy to.
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:I have a very big heart and got a lot
of heart centered things to talk about.
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:Joshua: I am so excited about that
because I have enjoyed with the numerous
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:guests I've had on the show so far just
talking about what is on people's hearts.
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:That's really what this is all about, so
thank you so much for being part of this.
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:I really wanted to start out with
a simple question because Martha, I
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:already let the audience know your
background a little bit about what you do.
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:I'm just curious, what got you
into doing a coaching business?
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:Martha: Yeah, that's a good question.
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:You know, I taught psychology for 10
years, and I taught high school for
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:a long time, and then I retired, and
when I retired, I kind of fell down.
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:I got bored and I didn't feel useful,
so I had to go through a lot of stuff
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:and got a mentor and changed my life,
and then I thought, "you know what?
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:I think maybe I have got a lot to share
with people and to be able to help them
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:the way that I was helped over my, well,
really, I think I became depressed.
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:I became like, hopeless, you know?
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:I'm 69 years old and I
love getting up every day.
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:I love every day, but there was
a period of time there after I
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:retired where I was like, "Well,
what am I doing?", so I lost my way.
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:Joshua: I love the fact though that
you kind of found something that
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:doesn't make you feel depressed.
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:It doesn't make you feel that way
because I feel that, and it's funny
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:because my mom, she just turned 70
the last few months and I know that
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:for her and my dynamic with her, like
she kind of says the same things like,
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:"Oh, I don't know what to do.", and I'm
like, "Well, there's things you can do.
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:There's so many opportunities, and
you have so many different skills
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:that you've learned", and I'm like
at 36, I'm still thinking about all
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:those things that I'm doing it to kind
of make that inspiration happen in
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:other people's lives, so I like that.
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:Well here, I'll lead it into this
question that I have for you, so,
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:I noticed that before you went into
coaching, and even before you were a
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:college professor, I'm assuming you
were also a science and math teacher.
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:What inspired you to be in science and
math, to be able to teach other kids?
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:Martha: Oh, you gotta hear this story.
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:Okay, so I had a degree, and
I did become, I was a college
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:professor first for ten years.
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:Joshua: Oh, okay.
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:Martha: Then I became a
science and math teacher.
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:Well anyway, so I answered an ad to be
a teacher and it said if you already
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:have a degree, they were in distressed
areas where they couldn't get teachers.
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:They said if you already have a degree
of some kind, then you can teach for
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:five years while you get your teaching
degree, but you have to get your teaching
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:degree in that time, and you would not
believe how many people did not get
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:their teaching degree in that time,
but I did, but anyway, so I became a
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:teacher and it was for special education.
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:My first day at school- now, I don't know
if this happens anymore, but for special
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:education It was a little bit laxer
than others, and since we didn't have
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:teaching degrees anyway, so at my first
teacher's meeting and they said, "Okay.
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:Who wants what subject?", and
I said, "Well, I like science."
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:They said, "Okay, Burich,
you're the science teacher.
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:Now, I did go and get my degree
in biology, so I'm legitimate.
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:I became a legitimate science teacher.
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:Joshua: Did you enjoy going
through biology, even though you
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:volunteered to be a science teacher?
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:Martha: Oh, that's the thing.
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:When I was in college, oh my goodness,
Josh, I think it was my second semester,
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:we had to find the amoeba in this, I don't
know, glass of water or something, okay,
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:and we had to find this amoeba in lab.
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:I couldn't find the amoeba.
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:I was crying my eyes out.
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:I was like 19.
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:I was crying.
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:"I'm stupid.
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:I can't", you know, so I grew up a little
bit and realized, "Well, you know what?
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:Yesterday's not tomorrow.
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:Yesterday's not even today."
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:I like science.
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:I'm good at science.
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:The same thing with math.
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:I didn't think I was good with math.
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:I'm really good with math.
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:I like math.
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:Joshua: You don't hear that nowadays
anymore because I feel that people
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:tend to go into some sort of the
liberal arts curriculum, which I did.
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:I went to school, got my political
science, communications degree, went on
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:to get business administration, which
does work with a little bit of math,
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:obviously; did a little bit of accounting,
but even then, I feel that it's really
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:important to have that well roundedness,
especially with having some of the home
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:ec skills, like being able to balance
a checkbook, be able to manage your
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:finances, be able to invest, like those
are skills that I feel that we need to
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:continuously do, and I think we definitely
need more teachers, especially like you
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:that are, are providing that, so I love
that you did for that long period of time.
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:Martha: Yeah.
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:Joshua: So, since you were doing college
professorship first, where did you
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:teach at and what was that experience
like to teach with college students?
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:Martha: Well, once you had a master's
degree, you could be an adjunct college
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:professor, so they wouldn't hire
you to be the PhD person full-time,
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:but they needed part-time teachers,
so I had a master's degree, and
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:what they would do at the time was.
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:because it was cost effective, they
would hire somebody, a part timer, to
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:work full time, but they'd get part
time pay, so anyway, this was at St.
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:Louis Community College, in St.
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:Louis, Missouri.
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:I also taught, I think I taught a
class at University of Missouri, St.
126
:Louis.
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:I taught a class at Maryville
University; a couple of classes
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:at Maryville University.
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:That place was great.
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:I had the greatest students.
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:I taught a few classes there.
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:Anyway, all my classes were so much
fun, and they had me teaching child
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:psychology, and psychology, and sociology.
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:Oh my goodness, I just
had such a good time.
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:I had police officers in my classes,
because I taught most of my classes
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:at night, and most of my students
were older and I was older at the
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:time, and it was just- I shouldn't
say older, I was in my 40s.
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:Is that older?
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:Please.
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:Joshua: Well, I'm almost 40, so
I guess, I guess that, but we're
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:going to say that's younger.
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:Martha: Yeah, don't, don't
give me that stuff, young man.
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:You understand?
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:Joshua: Yes, ma'am.
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:Martha: I don't want to hear that
old stuff, because you know what?
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:I'm 69 and I'm young.
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:I feel great, and I see
people; I see these videos.
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:There's a woman who does
gymnastics in her nineties.
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:There's men on an island somewhere
in their eighties shimmying up the
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:coconut tree, getting the coconuts.
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:It is not our destiny: walker, wheelchair,
nursing home, that is not our destiny.
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:Our destiny is perfect
health until we die.
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:Joshua: I like that philosophy
because even my mom's like, "You're
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:never going to put me in a home.
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:I don't want to go in a home",
and I'm like, "Okay, okay.
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:We want you to live a full life."
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:Martha: Exactly, and you know, they say
if you hit 50 with no heart problems, no
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:heart disease, you can expect to live, a
woman at least, to live to at least 92.
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:Joshua: Wow, I don't
think I even knew that.
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:Martha: Yeah, we've got a lot
of life left in us, so to retire
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:and decide that, "Okay, I think
I'll watch TV now."; uh, no.
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:I took piano lessons at 62.
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:I started singing, and
that's another story too.
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:Alright, I'm going to tell
you my piano story, then I'll
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:tell you my singing story.
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:Joshua: OK.
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:Martha: Alright, piano.
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:This is before I retired.
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:I drive by the music store
in the town where I lived,
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:and I'm like, "You know what?
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:I want to take piano.", so I go in,
and the piano teacher is an elementary
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:school music teacher, so every week
I come and I practice my piano.
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:Now this was August.
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:I started in August.
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:Late November, "Martha, I want you
to play in the Christmas recital."
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:Josh, that's for children.
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:So I said, okay, why not?
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:So, the day of the recital comes, I play
after the five year old and before the ten
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:year old, and the kid was homeschooled.
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:He was a phenom.
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:The kid was fabulous.
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:Wrote his own music.
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:He was something.
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:Well, and I played From
This Moment by Shania Twain.
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:Oh, I'm so proud of myself.
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:I did it perfectly.
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:Okay, so afterwards, now who's there?
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:Parents and grandparents.
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:Afterwards, all these parents
and grandparents are coming up to
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:me, especially the grandparents.
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:"Oh my goodness, you've inspired me.
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:I thought I was too old
to learn something new.
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:I was going to take piano.
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:I was going to take guitar.
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:I was going to learn flower
arrangement, and I thought I was
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:too old, but you've changed my mind.
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:I'm going to do it now."
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:Joshua: I think that it's important
to have people that no matter
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:what age just to be able to stand
side by side, be a mentor for
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:them, and it doesn't necessarily
mean having a direct relationship
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:like you and I do with coaching.
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:It doesn't mean working one
on one with groups of people.
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:Sometimes it means just being a positive
influence for the larger community as
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:a whole so that they feel inspired to
do that, and I would not have the guts
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:to learn singing because I'm a very low
baritone voice and very deep, and that's
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:just after the fifth grade, I was a
nice little soprano when I turned into a
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:very deep alto, but I totally hear what
you're saying though, because I think
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:it's always good to learn a new skill,
and it doesn't matter what age you're at.
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:Martha: It's the whole
process of enjoying life.
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:What will help me to enjoy life?
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:Well, learning piano would help me enjoy
life and develop my self confidence.
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:Now, the singing thing, I always thought
I had a lousy voice, but there was this
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:restaurant, it was about 30 minutes from
my home, and every Sunday night, a bunch
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:of guys would get together and just
jam, you know, a bunch of old guys, and
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:so, I would go there and I said, "Hey!
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:Can I sing?
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:You guys let me sing?", and they said,
"Yeah, what do you want to sing?", so
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:the next week I bring up Loretta Lynn,
You Ain't Woman Enough To Steal My Man.
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:Just a fun song, so I would just sing
and have fun, and then I even did Jolene.
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:I mean, that's a hard
song, Jolene, Dolly Parton.
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:That's a very hard song to sing, but I
would tell a story about Dolly Parton
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:and how she got in a fight with Jolene
and Jolene pulled the wig off Dolly's
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:head, and it was just a good time, so I
did that for a few months, just to make
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:life more interesting, because you should
always have something to look forward to.
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:Joshua: I think we all do need
something to look forward to, even if
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:it's just the small things, especially
with the hobbies that we enjoy.
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:I mean, I thought in the beginning when I
started this podcast, "Man, I think it's
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:just going to be a short term thing and
I might only last three months", but it's
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:turned into something much more than that.
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:I actually enjoy doing it as a little
bit of a hobby myself, although it is
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:through my business, so I think that
we find things that we kind of stumble
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:into and we actually really enjoy that.
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:Speaking of things you enjoy, I
want to talk about your business.
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:Perfect segue.
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:Your business is called Martha Burich
Consulting and Coaching, so can you give
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:us, in our audience, a wide view of some
of the things that you offer to people
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:through this business that you have?
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:Martha: Well, my program is called "Yes,
You Can, I Did.", because I got kicked
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:out of two colleges, but guess what?
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:I came back, I got degrees, and I
became a college professor, so failure
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:is absolutely no big deal, and a lot
of people seem to think if they're
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:not perfect, they're not thin, they're
not this, they're not that, they
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:can't live a full, beautiful life.
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:Well, that's really what
my coaching is all about.
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:Let's get you over the social anxiety.
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:Let's get you over this you're not
perfect, so you can't have a great life.
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:BS.
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:It's all our thoughts.
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:It's all thinking.
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:It's all thinking, and...
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:Joshua: Is there something that you see
common with clients that you work with
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:that they struggle with in terms of that
thought process, because I've worked
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:with even people since I've been open
for over a year now, where they kind
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:of have that thought paralysis where
they're stuck in that one thought about
255
:themselves, but they're not willing
to entertain other thoughts from the
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:outside, changing that perspective.
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:Have you encountered that a lot?
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:What are some of the things
that you typically do to
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:work with clients with that?
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:Martha: You know, the thinking
of stuff like no matter what
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:I do, it's not good enough.
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:Whatever decision I make,
it's not the right one.
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:When's the other shoe going to drop?
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:Oh, I'd really like to do that, but...
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:What?
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:No, I'm not smart enough.
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:I'm not whatever enough for that.
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:Yes.
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:Each person is different, so I work
on individual things with each person.
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:I don't have a set program because each
person is different, and we work on what
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:they think is most important to them to
get over, whether it's social anxiety.
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:Let's say they want a different job, okay?
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:Well, let's see what we got
to do to get you a new job.
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:Where do you want to work?
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:Who do you want to work for?
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:Start thinking those kind of things.
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:Do you want to start your own business,
so we go into that way, or, they don't
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:go to parties and things because they
don't know what they're going to do
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:because they're all by themselves.
280
:Let me give you this tip, Josh.
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:If you go to a party
alone, here's what you do.
282
:You make yourself the welcoming
committee, so when someone comes in
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:the door, You say, "Hey, how you doing?
284
:I'm so and so.", and if you see anybody
alone, you make yourself the official
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:helper of anybody who doesn't have
somebody to talk to; that's your job.
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:You're going to scout, you're
going to be the helper to
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:make sure nobody feels alone.
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:Joshua: I would have loved to hear that
advice at my first middle school dance
289
:where I was attached to the wall and
being a wallflower as we have all heard
290
:that expression, and I wish I would
have just been rambunctious or more
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:socially attuned enough to be able to
do that, but my audience knows this.
292
:I didn't even share this with you, Martha,
but being autistic that I have been
293
:finding out later in life, I realized
I understand why I didn't do that.
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:It wasn't the welcoming committee,
but now I'm like, "Let's do it.
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:I wanted to try this", so I
actually literally wrote that down.
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:Next time I'm at a networking
event, I'm going to try it out.
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:I'll report back to you, okay?
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:Martha: Great.
299
:Oh, I'd love to hear it, and
believe me, whenever you get out
300
:of yourself, things work out as
soon as you get out of yourself.
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:It's just like speaking.
302
:When you're not thinking about how am I
going to come across and you're thinking
303
:about what value can I give this audience?
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:How can I help these people in
this audience the most, then stuff
305
:just comes out of your mouth.
306
:The right stuff.
307
:Joshua: Yeah, and I feel that for
me, for like the longest time, I
308
:was definitely struggling with that.
309
:I know people that I work with having that
sort of social anxiety about themselves
310
:and just trying to get over that feeling
because it's always something that lies
311
:dormant, and I think it's a little bit of
anxiety and I've had anxiety coaches on
312
:the show that have talked about how they
work through that process, so when you
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:actually are working with someone, and you
said this earlier that you kind of tailor
314
:this to certain individuals, certain
aspects of what they might be going
315
:through, is there a system that you use?
316
:Do you ask them what their goals are?
317
:Martha: Oh, definitely.
318
:Joshua: Can you like, walk us
through what you do with them?
319
:Yeah.
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:Martha: Yeah, I ask them
what their goals are.
321
:Why they haven't met them?
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:Why haven't you met these goals?
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:How long have you had this goal?
324
:Is it something you really want?
325
:On a scale of 1 to 10, how bad do you want
this goal, because if they say a 3, what
326
:are we talking about, and 10 is really
bad and one, I barely want it at all, then
327
:why are we talking about this goal, or do
you need to light a fire under your butt?
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:Is this goal really important to you,
but you think you can't have it, and
329
:that's why you said it's a three.
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:Joshua: I think that we often have to push
them to be like, "Why you want as a three?
331
:It should be a 10 out of 10 you want to
achieve this!", and we have to get them
332
:to that framework because, you're right,
sometimes it does take a matter of kicking
333
:them in the butt, but it's also giving
them actionable steps to be able to kick
334
:them in the butt to do the same thing, so-
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:Martha: Right.
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:Joshua: So, Martha, I do want to
talk about some of the books that
337
:you've written, and actually, I found
this really interesting that, and I
338
:remember reading these growing up.
339
:You were one of the contributing
authors for the Chicken
340
:Soup for the Soul Cookbook.
341
:I would love to hear what you
wrote about that and how can people
342
:actually access that, by the way?
343
:Is that still available
that people can purchase?
344
:Martha: It is!
345
:It's available on Amazon.
346
:You'll probably get a used copy.
347
:I'm not sure if there's any
new ones are left, but, yeah,
348
:it is available on Amazon.
349
:In the story I wrote, I was a
substitute teacher at the time, and
350
:my story's called, "A Fish, A Fish,
Lord, I Need A Fish", and I was
351
:substituting kindergarten art, so I
taught the children how to draw a fish.
352
:You wouldn't believe how easy it
is, and anyway, so one little five
353
:year old, he just started crying.
354
:" I can't draw a fish.", and my thought in
my mind was, "You know, here he is five
355
:years old and already 'can't'; it's so
strong in his mind", and so, the thing
356
:is, Josh, when people are in distress
like that, well, when anyone is in a, "I
357
:can't mode", you don't want to reinforce,
so I didn't want to fawn all over him.
358
:"Oh, now, honey, it's okay.", you know.
359
:I said, "Well, sweetheart, I understand
how you feel, and I suspect that maybe
360
:if you look around and see what your
friends are doing, maybe you can see a
361
:way that you can make the fish.", and then
I left, and then I said, "So you try to
362
:do your fish here and I'll talk to you
later", and then I left and got busy.
363
:I don't know, 10, 15 minutes
later, the kids yelling, "I
364
:drew a fish, I drew a fish.
365
:Look at my fish.", and I was
like, "Whoa.", and I went over and
366
:yes, he drew a fish in a garden.
367
:He drew a fish in a garden.
368
:Oh, it was so cute.
369
:and, you know, I didn't
say, "You could draw fish."
370
:I said, "Well, look at you.
371
:Look at you.
372
:You did it.
373
:You did it.", so you never
want to get into reinforcing I
374
:can't and I'm not good enough.
375
:You always want to encourage to the
best way you can, and it worked.
376
:Joshua: Drawing back to the
fact that you were kind of...
377
:Is it correct to say you're
kicked out of college?
378
:Were you kicked out of college?
379
:Martha: Yeah, yeah.
380
:They threw me out, baby.
381
:Joshua: So, yeah.
382
:I mean, did that for a period of time
really hold you back too, because
383
:it sounds like to me just sharing
that example, I kind of just drew
384
:a couple parallels here of, "Wow.
385
:I think I know why you're
saying this to this child of,
386
:"Yeah, you can draw that fish.
387
:You can do what you can do.
388
:You are good enough to do that."
389
:I mean, was there some of that self
talk happening when you were going
390
:through those experiences back
then, like what kind of pushed you
391
:then to keep on moving forward?
392
:Martha: My whole thing,
Josh, was social anxiety.
393
:I was so afraid of what other people
thought of me, and I was never good
394
:enough, so yes, and my mother was
an indomitable figure; that means
395
:that she didn't quit, and she kind
of taught me not to quit, so I was
396
:sitting around the house one day crying.
397
:I had a 1.0 GPA.
398
:That's a D.
399
:That's a D, okay, and in high
school, I had good grades in high
400
:school, and then I go to college,
and I was totally out of my element.
401
:I didn't know what was going on.
402
:Everything was so hard.
403
:Well anyway, so I had a 1.
404
:0 GPA, and I was crying to my mother,
and my mother said, "You go march
405
:right back to that college, and you ask
them to let you back in.", so I did.
406
:I drove right down to the college,
and I said, "Let me back in."
407
:Talk to the dean, and he gave me a lot
of BS, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah,
408
:blah, blah, blah, blah, okay, okay,
okay, it was, "We're going to put you
409
:on probation for the next semester.
410
:You've got to get all C's and
above, and if you don't..."
411
:"Okay, okay", well, I had wised up and
smartened up at that time, and I took
412
:like three classes, didn't overload
myself, and made sure I made A's and B's.
413
:Joshua: I was going to say that it
is something that we sometimes think,
414
:"Man, I just don't know if I got it.
415
:I don't know if I can get another
opportunity", but sometimes we don't even
416
:ask for the opportunity, so I like that
you just went back in and said, "Look.
417
:Give me the shot.
418
:I know what I did wrong.
419
:Give me the shot.", and I think we often
as a society, when we do something wrong,
420
:we already have that preconceived judgment
of somebody saying, "We're never going
421
:to give them a shot", and I know, and I
have been a personal victim of that, and
422
:for all my listeners out there that might
be listening to this and saying, "Hey!
423
:You're not going to be good enough, Josh.
424
:You can't come back to this."
425
:I say to you, listen to what Martha just
shared as an example and give me a chance,
426
:give everybody a chance, because they
might've realized what they had going on
427
:in their life that they've changed, so.
428
:I love that story.
429
:I love the fact that you did come
back and you finished what you did
430
:because obviously, as we talked about,
it's been a rewarding career for you.
431
:Martha: Thanks.
432
:I know a fellow who was in
jail for 10 years unjustly.
433
:I never met him personally.
434
:Anyway, he got out of jail,
became an electrician, got all
435
:the certifications and stuff.
436
:Now he has his own business as
an electrician and he's doing
437
:very well, and I go to the jail.
438
:Every Monday, I take an AA meeting
into the jail and I talk to those
439
:women there and I say, "When you get
out of here, yes, it might be harder
440
:for you to get a job, but I'm going
to tell you what you have to do.
441
:You look around for the
job you really want.
442
:You take something you have to take in
the meantime, but you look for the job
443
:you really want, and you write a letter
to that manager or owner, and you say,
444
:"I'll be the best employee you ever had.
445
:Give me a chance.", and I say, "You got
nothing to lose and everything to gain."
446
:Joshua: You have everything to gain.
447
:I think that we have all these things
that we can do in our lives, and
448
:it's just a matter of being able to
say, "Yes, you can", and I love that
449
:for people that are going through
it and have already addressed what
450
:crimes they have done in the past.
451
:They are able to do a
lot of good things, so-
452
:Martha: That's right.
453
:Joshua: I want to wrap up, Martha,
with this book that has recently
454
:come out that you've written.
455
:It's called Good Parents Sense.
456
:Martha: Oh yes, that
one's due to be published.
457
:It's in second edit, so it should
be out in about a month or so-
458
:Joshua: Yeah.
459
:Martha: And it is a book I wrote when
my son was about ten, and I had taken
460
:parenting lessons with him when he was
four and five, and I was very interested
461
:in that, and it also came out because
I was teaching child psychology at the
462
:time, too, so I wrote the book, and
yeah, it's a very short little book,
463
:about 60 pages, that you can look at
if you're at the grocery store and
464
:the kid misbehaves, what do you do?
465
:How do you get them to go to bed at night?
466
:Just little things to build their self
esteem and things you can do to get
467
:them to behave properly without you
tearing your hair out all the time.
468
:Joshua: Yes, and I don't have any
children, but I know many of my listeners
469
:have children and they will certainly
appreciate any sort of advice, any sort
470
:of tips whatsoever when it comes to
that for sure, so thanks for writing
471
:that, and I can't wait for it to be
released for sure for everybody to be
472
:able to have a copy of it for sure.
473
:Martha: Thanks.
474
:Joshua: So one last question,
Martha, before I give you an
475
:opportunity to just let everybody
know how they can reach out to you.
476
:I've been reflecting on our
conversation as we're going along here.
477
:You're 69 years old and you have
lived a very fulfilling life and it
478
:isn't very often that I get to talk to
guests that have had a rich life like
479
:yours of being able to help all kinds
of different age populations, being
480
:able to educate and being able to help
others in a variety of different ways.
481
:Out of all the things that you have
done in your life, all the different
482
:things that you have experienced, and
I know this is going to be a pretty
483
:tough question, but I think it's really
rewarding for those that are kind
484
:of stuck in the mindset of, "Oh, I'm
always stuck in what I have to do and
485
:what I was set out to be and destined
to be, that's always what I'm going to
486
:be.", and that isn't necessarily true.
487
:You've really shared with us today how
you can pivot and be able to create
488
:those best versions of ourselves.
489
:What would you say was the most
rewarding experience in your entire
490
:life so far, and why was that
the most rewarding experience?
491
:Martha: Raising my son.
492
:Being a parent.
493
:It was a lot of fun.
494
:He's 40.
495
:He's 40 now.
496
:It was a lot of fun.
497
:Joshua: We could almost be like brothers.
498
:Martha: Yeah, exactly, so being a parent
is a very, very important job and family
499
:is very important, so, if you're a parent,
you're the backbone of civilization.
500
:There's no such thing as
just a mother, just a father.
501
:You are the person that shows
your children what is possible.
502
:Joshua: So true, and we need those
sort of role models in this world.
503
:I've even listed with other episodes
about the fatherless epidemic, having
504
:just the parents in general having a
role model when it counts the most.
505
:I think it's so important
because we definitely need those
506
:spheres of influence for sure.
507
:Martha, thanks so much for
this awesome conversation.
508
:I want to give you the last few
minutes to just pitch yourself.
509
:Please tell us how people
can reach out you if they're
510
:interested in being coached.
511
:Maybe you want to reference even
your books where they're available.
512
:I know you mentioned Amazon; don't
know if there were other places,
513
:but, why don't you take the last few
moments here and let our audience
514
:know how they can reach out to you.
515
:Martha: Thanks, Josh.
516
:Well, I do have a website: MarthaBurich.
517
:com, and there's a link
there if you'd like to book a
518
:session with me; a free talk.
519
:We could talk about what it
is that you're interested in,
520
:and if I can help you or not.
521
:I'm on LinkedIn: Martha Burich.
522
:I'm on Facebook.
523
:You can always direct message me
and check my posts and things.
524
:I'm pretty accessible.
525
:The books aren't published yet,
so they'll be coming out, but
526
:hopefully a couple of months.
527
:Joshua: Awesome.
528
:I'll put all that in the episode
notes for my listeners in case you
529
:want to check that out and check out
Martha and reach out to her, but I
530
:want to wrap up by saying, Martha,
it is really fascinating to just
531
:talk to people that are in a retired
state, although they're not retired.
532
:They're just keep on learning and learning
and going and going, because I have known
533
:many people in my career that I still
have with working with state government
534
:as I continue to build out the business
of having that rich, fulfilled life, and
535
:doing what they really desire to do, even
at a wiser age, as I like to call it.
536
:Not an older age, but a riser age because
we learned so much getting up to that
537
:point, and I think that what you share
today is just a prime example of what
538
:we can all do and what we can all create
is value in our lives, so for all those
539
:reasons, and for the reasons in which
you have been part of this show and just
540
:sharing this awesome testament to why
it's important to keep on going, Martha.
541
:Thanks for being on
Speaking From The Heart.
542
:It was really a privilege
today to talk to you.
543
:Martha: Thanks, Josh.
544
:I really enjoyed it.
545
:You're a great interviewer.
546
:Joshua: Again, I want to thank Martha
so much for taking her time to discuss
547
:a variety of different topics, not
only relating to her own life, but how
548
:she's helped others to overcome and
even address some of those difficult
549
:topics that we have in our lives.
550
:"Difficult topics?
551
:What do you mean by that, Josh?
552
:I have a perfect life, and I have a lot
of different things that make it perfect.
553
:I have a wonderful person in
my life that's supporting me.
554
:I got great kids.
555
:I have an awesome job.
556
:I have all these things working for me.
557
:What do you mean that there is this
big struggle in life of hopelessness,
558
:neglect, depression, and just
learning and learning and learning?
559
:I don't have that problem."
560
:Well, you might not be like a normal,
typical person then, if you are saying
561
:all those things about yourself, but
I think that's what makes this episode
562
:special in so many different ways.
563
:Martha shared with us today a variety
of different skills that she had learned
564
:to adapt to, not only from the things
that she has been exposed to in her
565
:life, but just because of some of the
most common, interesting things that she
566
:wanted to appeal herself to, it allowed
her to create not just those things that
567
:she wanted to do, not just those things
that she could help society in doing,
568
:but she made herself her own welcoming
committee, which I loved when we talked
569
:about that part of the interview that
we're not just necessarily talking about
570
:when you go to a networking event, or
you're going to that social engagement, in
571
:which you're talking to someone that you
might not have talked to in a long time.
572
:We are literally talking about things that
allow us to enjoy not only the things that
573
:we have in our lives, but the people that
we get to enjoy on a day to day basis.
574
:You have to be able to help yourself
enjoy life, so that really creates the
575
:question, what will you help yourself do
in order to enjoy that best value life?
576
:There could be a lot of
different things you can do.
577
:You could pick up a hobby.
578
:You could pick up a new skill.
579
:You could pick up a new subject.
580
:Martha did that so many different
times that I lost count even during
581
:this episode, but I think that's what
makes it beautiful in itself is that
582
:we're able to have all these different
kinds of paths to work through,
583
:and that we're able to create those
opportunities no matter where they come
584
:from, but it's about feeling comfortable
and doing that at the same time.
585
:Social anxiety is the number
one thing that has paralyzed us.
586
:Glossophobia, which I've talked about
in some of my public speaking episodes,
587
:can really hold us back from really
portraying that thought, skill, or ability
588
:to eloquently speak about in front of an
audience that allows us to develop who
589
:we are, but I think that is part of why
we should continuously press the button
590
:in not only helping ourselves grow, not
only helping ourselves become better, but
591
:allowing us to understand that we might
have pitfalls that we have to navigate
592
:through, and even though those navigation
errors do occur, we have to have good
593
:sense to not only help each other pick
up those boots that might have fallen on
594
:the ground from our child that need to
be put in the correct place, but we also
595
:need to be able to understand that when
we learn to make mistakes, we can learn
596
:from those mistakes and get better, and
we can grow from them, so it really also
597
:begs this second question: do you help
others in their biggest time of need?
598
:Do you have a good parent sense, and I'm
not just talking about a good sense of
599
:the tips in which you can help yourselves
to become a better parent, a better
600
:educator, a better role model for others.
601
:It doesn't mean just
necessarily those things.
602
:It can just be the simple fact that you
are intentionally trying, that you're
603
:intentionally creating those best
opportunities for others that makes
604
:the biggest impact, and I always talk
about in my episodes the concept of an
605
:opportunity when it presents itself.
606
:Opportunities don't necessarily
always come to those that wait.
607
:You have to seek them out, and I know
plenty of people that have redeveloped,
608
:and retrained themselves, into completely
different new paths as a result of
609
:some setbacks, and other things that
might have happened in their life.
610
:It doesn't make anybody a failure,
and that's the biggest thing that
611
:I have to stress coming out of this
episode is that no one is a failure.
612
:It's when you actually do fail though,
it's the opportunity that intersects
613
:of you not wanting to try, and you also
failing to realize that other people
614
:might want to help you in being a better
person overall, so raising yourself
615
:to create those lessons for others, to
help others see what their true worth
616
:is, means that you have to put a little
bit of effort in yourself, and I think
617
:if anybody would have demonstrated that
in any of my episodes, it's Martha.
618
:That's why, Martha, when you're listening
to this, I want you to know something.
619
:You have definitely changed my
perspective on the fact that,
620
:sometimes, we don't want to ever retire.
621
:We don't ever want to give up,
because that means that we're
622
:throwing in the towel of all the other
possibilities that exist in life.
623
:I want to be more like Martha, and I think
all of you should be a little bit more
624
:like Martha, with the things that she has
been able to become, and the things that
625
:she will continue to become even after she
listens to this episode, and you listen
626
:to this episode as well, because we can
learn to make new skills out of anything.
627
:I think that we can even help others
that are going through those same
628
:patterns, and I had Cheryl Baker on the
show not all that long ago that talked
629
:about that concept when she's helping
new music teachers learn how to sing.
630
:Ah, singing.
631
:Something that Martha was also trying
too, so, I think that really helps
632
:us to understand this bigger question
that we have to answer: what will
633
:you do to help yourself enjoy life?
634
:What will you do to help others
in their biggest time of need?
635
:Are you going to work with them or
are you going to keep on walking by,
636
:pretending that they don't even exist?
637
:There've been many times in my life
when, which I always thought that
638
:maybe people were just too busy for me.
639
:Even when I asked for that help, I
knew that maybe, deep down inside, I
640
:would be able to still form that human
connection, to form that ability to
641
:create not only those relationships
that I desperately wanted, not just
642
:those best opportunities, which I've
always continuously talked about on
643
:this show, but also maybe building those
blocks so that I can actually have that
644
:heartfelt connection with someone else.
645
:Sometimes that can be very hard.
646
:Sometimes that is very challenging for
even people that are on a spectrum to
647
:even socially interact with others,
which is why even having the vast
648
:amount of technology available to
us to now call and talk to others,
649
:isn't always the best medicine to
take, so I think it really comes back
650
:to what you want to do in your life.
651
:Maybe you like to draw a fish, and maybe
that fish can be a ocean of possibilities
652
:where you have the octopus, the
squid, maybe even other sea creatures.
653
:I don't know what might have struck
me about this sort of topic today,
654
:but I almost feel as if when I'm
talking about this, I also want to get
655
:overwhelmed by the numerous amount of
possibilities that exist as a result of
656
:having all these different opportunities
that are existing in this episode,
657
:so let me break it down for you if
you are feeling a little overwhelmed.
658
:This episode isn't just about the fact
that we have all these different options
659
:available to us, that we're not just stuck
in one thing, that we can do anything that
660
:we want, but the ocean that we can swim
in is also a playground of possibility.
661
:It's a cornucopia of different
options to choose from.
662
:Now, if that colorful imagery of all
kinds of different objects, places, and
663
:opportunities appeal to you, maybe then
it's time to work with somebody to help
664
:you to understand what is possible,
not only to not just see what those
665
:developmental opportunities are, but
maybe just have a sense of curiosity,
666
:which we've talked about on this show.
667
:It might help you not only in your
biggest time of need to lean on, to
668
:be part of, to be appreciative in, but
maybe just creating that little bit of
669
:a comfort for somebody else, whether
it is just for you, or for another
670
:individual, might help you with your
lessons learned because we all have
671
:something that we can learn in this world.
672
:No matter how young, or how old you are.
673
:No matter how wise or how unwise you
are, and no matter how much you might
674
:struggle to get to that other side, you
are always learning, and that is what is
675
:so important to keep that perspective;
to keep that momentum going, because as
676
:long as you can ask those two questions:
What will help to enjoy what's in
677
:your life, and what you can do to help
others in their biggest time of need?
678
:I think that maybe you are on the right
track of what Martha has done, and I
679
:think that maybe you can help others
see what their true worth is, because
680
:in this wild world of relationships,
confidence, and determination, when they
681
:all converge, I think that it might turn
into something either completely messy,
682
:or something completely magical, and I
think that it might be worth your time
683
:to just try it out and see what happens.
684
:Thanks for listening to episode
number 88 of Speaking From the
685
:Heart, and I look forward to
hearing from your heart very soon.
686
:Outro: Thanks for listening.
687
:For more information about our podcast
and future shows, search for Speaking From
688
:The Heart to subscribe and be notified
wherever you listen to your podcasts.
689
:Visit us at www.
690
:yourspeakingvoice.
691
:biz for more information about
potential services that can help you
692
:create the best version of yourself.
693
:See you next time.