God created us with incredible bodies and brains to be used throughout our life, but a big mistake that many of us make is thinking that our brain or body should be in charge of us. In reality, it's the soul that should be calling the shots.

In this episode, we'll talk about the big temptations we face and how to overcome things that will keep us from fulfilling our life's greatet purpose, like negative thought loops, victim-mentality, addictions and buffering from negative emotions.

Connecting with our soul and checking in with God will give us our best chance at building the life of our dreams, even though it will include hard things and feeling badly. We know that this is the path to our greatest joy!

Ready for one-on-one guidance? Schedule a free coaching call with me so we can make progress on your dreams.

Microphone (HyperX SoloCast)-1:

You're listening to episode 43 of

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burning brightly mind, body, and soul.

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This is burning brightly, a podcast

for Christian moms who are feeling

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called to build a business and

share their light with the world.

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I'm Bonnie Wiscombe, a life

coach, mom, and entrepreneur.

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And I'm honored to be your guide as you

face this business building adventure full

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of highs, lows, and everything in between.

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This is where we help each

other find the courage to shine.

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Microphone (HyperX SoloCast):

Hello friends.

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Welcome back today.

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I've got an episode for you about our,

basically two most important possessions,

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and that is our mind and our body.

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Now we actually have another main

entity that we're going to talk

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about today, and that is our soul.

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And we're going to talk about how the

three of these kind of play together.

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Sometimes don't play so nicely

and how we can better align

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them for our best possible life.

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So the brain and the body.

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R four using they're very efficient.

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They are very useful.

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We use them to accomplish things.

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And the soul or our spirit is what.

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Gives us life and gives

us purpose in this life.

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So the body and the brain

have so many uses, we can run.

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We can think we can brainstorm.

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We can build businesses.

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We can eat, we can hug, we can sleep.

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We can do so many amazing

things with our body and brain.

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The soul or the spirit is a

little bit less understood.

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And hopefully we can be a little

bit clear about what its role is in

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our life by the end of this episode.

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So the body and the brain

are these super great tools.

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They are.

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These.

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Absolutely incredible creations that we

can't even really begin to understand.

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We have some amazing, incredible

genius doctors and scientists out

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there that still don't understand.

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Even the basic.

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Workings of our brain,

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my daughter goes to the neurologist

and I'll ask questions and she

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goes, we don't really know.

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We don't really know that either.

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We don't really like we're doing

the best we can to understand

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these incredible creations we've

been given, but they are complex.

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They are also bent on survival.

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That is the body.

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And brain's number one.

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Goal is to survive.

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It wants to do so by being lazy and happy.

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That's how you survive.

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Minimum exertion, maximum pleasure.

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That will keep me alive until tomorrow.

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Okay.

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Now the soul we see in.

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A much less concrete way.

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We see our soul in our intuition.

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Or inspiration, those gut feelings.

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We see our soul and we have a deep

connection with another human being.

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Have you ever felt that.

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We know that our soul is good.

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It is eternal.

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It is like pure light

and it's so powerful.

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I believe that our soul never wants

to benefit at another being's expense.

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That's our mind that kind

of gets in the way and.

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Causes us to act in

ways we aren't proud of.

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Now the body to the soul is

kind of like close to the body.

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So close are necessary and useful.

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They help us do what we want to do.

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It's kind of hard to go hike

a mountain with some friends.

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If you're naked.

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But close, just like the body can

also be constricting or binding.

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And it can hold us back

from our potential.

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So think about, for example, what

you can do in tennis shoes and

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leggings versus what you can do

in high heels on a tight skirt.

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There's a big difference

between what you're capable of.

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In comfortable clothes versus restricting

clothes, same thing with the body.

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The body can make it.

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So our soul is more capable of good.

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Beautiful things or it can make it harder.

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It can kind of become a prison for us.

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I personally think that a huge goal

of life here on earth is to learn, to

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use our soul and our body in tandem.

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Each helping each other because

they are both essential.

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There are some tenants of Christianity

that believed the body is kind of evil,

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like this prison that we're stuck in.

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And I don't believe that I believe it

is good and wonderful and beautiful,

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but it has to be taught how to act.

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Appropriately

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because when the body's passions

and pleasures get out of control.

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Then the soul suffers.

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We talk about how we want

to overcome our natural man.

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We want to become like God, by

pushing away the things of the world

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and tuning into that spirit that

is teaching us how to be that God.

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So, how do we put the soul back in charge?

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How do we make sure that the soul

is in charge of the brand, the body?

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Well, the first answer is coaching.

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Of course.

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And one of the first answers doing

thought work, controlling that narrative.

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Uh, ensuring that our mind is being

managed and we are aware of why our body

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reacts in certain ways, like why the

nervous system reacts in a certain way.

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Now being a human is who we are.

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There's no shame.

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In.

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Being the way that we are.

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Sometimes we think we're broken,

because we react a certain way or we

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have some sort of traumatic response

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or we're imperfect in some way

that that is not a shameful thing.

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That is just life as a human being with

a mind, a body and a soul, trying to

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constantly work together to our greatest.

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Good.

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But we do have a responsibility to

do this, to manage our minds in our

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bodies, to teach them to work together.

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Otherwise.

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We're going to not fulfill our

potential and we're going to

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hurt other people in the process.

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We have to teach them to work together

within appropriate bounds, within.

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A set of rules and restrictions.

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So, how do we put the soul

in charge of the body?

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We talked about it being

in charge of the brain.

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We do thought work.

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We manage our mind.

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How do we put it in charge of the body?

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By controlling.

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Our appetites, our

passions, our pleasures.

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think about how much chaos happens to

your life and the lives of those you love.

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When you are addicted to, or not

able to control desires for food.

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Drugs, alcohol sex, other things

that can get rapidly out of control.

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They destroy lives literally and

figuratively, those things that

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are very addicting, make the

body being charged of the soul.

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That's not what we want.

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We want to make sure we manage those

desires so that the soul stays in charge.

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And of course it's not just substances

like alcohol and drugs and things and

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food, sugar, But behaviors sometimes

oversleeping or over Netflixing or

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over scrolling are ways that we allow

our body to just sit in comfort.

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And not do the hard thing

that is controlling itself.

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Now, some of these things that

are great desires, like food

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and sex, bring us great joy.

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They're there for a reason.

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We actually need both of them

to survive as a species, but

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they can also destroy us.

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Many of us don't have a lot of vices.

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But we all have to eat food.

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And so I see this a lot in food, is that

we use it as kind of a buffery mechanism.

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We use it to put between ourselves and

negative emotions and we just stuff our

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face instead of controlling ourselves or.

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Confronting the emotions that are painful.

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be really cautious of that one

because the downside to having.

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An addiction with food or unhealthy

relationship with food is that you

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can't eliminate food from your life.

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Like you can alcohol or drugs or

these other addictive substances.

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You really have to manage it.

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I think that a simple way to put this is

that addictions are the body's pleasures.

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Being prioritized over the souls.

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Purpose.

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So I'll say that again.

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Addictions are the body's pleasures

prioritized over the souls purpose.

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Addictions are a distraction.

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They are trying to distract us from

our life's work, because if we can sit

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in addictions and just feel comfort

over and over and over, we don't

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ever go out there and do hard things.

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We don't learn to embrace

the difficult, the suck.

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The hard stuff.

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We just want to be comfortable.

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So I think our constant goal

needs to be putting the soul

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in charge, making the soul, the

master and the body, the servant.

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And don't let those rules get mixed up.

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That's where we see a lot of problems.

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I see that much of the greatest

suffering that happens in mankind

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in general comes from this mix-up.

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Think about abuse or rape or murder

or violence or these horrible

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things we see happening on the news.

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War.

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These come from allowing the body's wants

like revenge or power or sex to overcome.

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The soul's needs, which of course

the soul is always quieter,

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the soul whispers, the body screams.

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I'm hungry.

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I want that I need that

the soul is not so loud.

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We have to quiet down the body in

order to hear what the soul needs

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and to put it in communion with God.

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God will tell us what the soul needs.

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If we're listening.

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I have another episode, episode six

is called embracing the bad stuff.

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If you want to learn a little bit

more about how important it is that we

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have both good and bad in the world,

that dichotomy of right versus wrong.

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And how to embrace some

of the negative stuff too.

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Reach your highest potential goal.

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Listen to that one.

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It's another short one,

but it is great too.

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We are complex human beings who were

created by an eternal amazing God.

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And he's given us this challenge of

making this mind, body, soul connection.

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Work together so that we can

become these incredible beings.

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Anytime we allow our mind or our body

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to wreak havoc on our soul.

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We will be living below our potential.

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A few questions to ask yourself, to see if

maybe this is something you struggle with.

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Where is your body holding back your soul?

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Is there anything that you feel out

of control of in regards to your body

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or even your mind, maybe a perpetual

victim mentality or self-criticism or

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other things that come up in your brain

regularly and hold you back from listening

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to what God has in store for you.

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Are there addictions that you

see yourself struggle with?

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And again, these could be something.

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That you don't necessarily.

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Think of when you say

addictions, they could be.

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Being on Instagram too long,

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maybe reading too many

novels or too much TV.

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Is there anything that your body is taking

comfort in that could be scaled back on.

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Are there substances or behaviors

that you consistently use as a buffer?

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Remember a buffer is something we

put between us a negative emotion.

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So I find myself using

sugar a lot for this.

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When I have negative emotion come up,

I think I needed some hot chocolate.

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I need a cookie.

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I need something that's going

to give me a hit of dopamine.

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So I don't have to feel these other

emotions that are coming up for me.

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Now, when it comes to negative emotions.

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They don't feel good.

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I get it.

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Nobody wants to sit and

feel shame, embarrassment.

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Fear loneliness, betrayal.

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Any of those things?

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But they are a part of

the human experience.

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And when they come up, there are

other ways to get comfort for them.

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Other than these substances and

behaviors, we need community.

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We need family, we need love

and connection, and we need God.

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We need something greater than us to look

to, to help us through these hard times.

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Just be aware of when you

are substituting these good.

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Ways of finding comfort

in hard times with.

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The counterfeit substitutions, like

food, drugs, alcohol, et cetera, the

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things that will be destructive to

you, look to your family, your friends,

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your God, for comfort in those times.

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And then sometimes we just have to allow

the negative emotion to move through us.

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There are so many opportunities to

do this in life that will strengthen

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us and help us reach our dreams.

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A few ideas are fasting.

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Do you ever try to fast?

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I do this.

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About once a month for spiritual reasons.

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And it is hard.

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You guys going without food for?

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I.

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I really only do it for about

half a day two-thirds of a day.

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It's difficult and you're hungry

and you're whiny and you get cranky.

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And I find myself.

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Really having to manage my mind

when my stomach is growling all day.

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That is a really, really

great experience for.

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Allowing yourself to feel negative

emotions so that you can get stronger.

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Speaking of getting stronger.

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What about strenuous exercise?

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Walking is great.

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Of course, a nice leisurely swim is

great for keeping your body active, but

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when you really push your body, you get

yourself into a place that feels awful.

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And feeling awful makes us stronger.

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It makes us be able to handle hard things.

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I see all the trend with

the cold plunging nowadays.

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I personally haven't tried it yet.

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I don't know that I'm brave enough.

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But this I believe is one of the benefits

of it is allowing yourself to feel awful

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so that, you know, you can do it again.

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You can do hard things.

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You can feel negative emotion.

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Let's go back to food.

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If food tends to trip you up, or you

feel like you have a mild addiction

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there, what about eliminating

really addictive substances?

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Like flour or sugar?

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That can be a very difficult thing

to do, especially when you're used to

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getting your comfort from those things.

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How about building a business, anybody

trying to build the business and

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feeling lots of negative emotion.

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Of course you are, because

that is a part of the game.

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You try to sell something and nobody

buys it or you sell something in

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somebody who's unhappy with it.

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Or a launch doesn't go as you

expected, or you start to feel like

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an imposter or somebody says something

crappy about you on social media.

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So many negative emotions that make you

a better person every time you feel them.

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What about repairing a relationship?

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Have you ever had a relationship

that was in disrepair and needed

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some apologies and some hard work?

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And you went to work on that.

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Or just helping someone who is hard to

deal with that you don't really love.

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That can be an amazing way to feel

negative emotion and to get stronger.

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Now I'm not talking about

torturing ourselves.

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You guys don't go out

and do anything harmful.

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Don't put yourself in danger, but

allow yourself to feel bad sometimes.

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We are so obsessed with feeling good.

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We have created all the

substances in the world.

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I mean, these food manufacturers are

in the lab trying to decide how much

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of this one chemical to put in so that

we eat as much as humanly possible.

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The chips are stacked against us.

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It's so easy to embrace that

feeling good, but the negative

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is part of the human experience.

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You have to embrace him, stop trying to

run away and buffer from real life because

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in the end it will come back to bite us.

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So this week, I challenge you to

seek what your soul is seeking.

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What does your soul need?

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And if you can't hear it, Maybe it's

time to listen a little bit more.

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And then use your body and your mind

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to compliment your soul's

journey and help it get there.

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I don't allow that body

and mind to take over.

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They are incredible tools, but they are

not in charge of this life of yours.

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You have a beautiful,

amazing life ahead of you.

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I can't wait to see what you do with it.

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Let's talk next week.

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Are you ready to get started

in your dream business?

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Join Finding Your Side Hustle, my digital

course that will guide you through

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discovering what it is you love and how to

turn it into a family friendly business.

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Are you ready for one on one

support as a mom or entrepreneur?

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Schedule a free coaching call with

me to work on the goals you have for

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your life, including business success,

weight loss, or better relationships.

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I can't wait to help you

make progress on your dreams.