Shownotes
Fiona shared her healing journey, particularly focusing on managing type 2 diabetes and weight loss through Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) after struggling with traditional dieting approaches. Together, discussing the role of the subconscious mind in safety perceptions and behavior patterns, emphasising how techniques like tapping can help reprogram these patterns. The session concluded with Fiona sharing her personal transformation through EFT and her transition to helping others with weight issues, while Jacky provided resources for listeners to support their own healing journeys.
Fiona is not on Instagram, but you can contact her via her website: https://fionagrant.co.uk/
Thank you for listening to the Podcast!
We would love to hear your thoughts on this episode.
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And if you want help on your own healing journey, then check out this Space to Grow 1:1 program - https://jackyclarke.co.uk/space-to-grow-11-package/
Until next week, happy healing.
Transcripts
Jacky Clarke: Amazing. Welcome back to the podcast, everyone. I am super excited to welcome yet another incredible guest to the podcast this week. So, we have the lovely Fiona joining us. Fiona, do you want to tell everyone where you are in the world and who you are?
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::Fiona Grant: Yes, so I am in the UK, and I am in a small place called Ferndown, which is halfway between Bournemouth in the county of Dorset, and Southampton in the county of Hampshire.
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::Fiona Grant: And I'm… it's really interesting, who are you, is actually a really interesting question, because my first impulse is to say, well, I'm Fiona Grant. Yeah, that's my name, but…
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::Fiona Grant: That just tells you my name, it doesn't tell you who I am.
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::Fiona Grant: So, who am I? Well, I'm so many different things.
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::Fiona Grant: But, I would say… at the heart, at the most basic level, I'm love, And I'm fair.
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::Fiona Grant: And both of these things, because at the love level, I am a soul, I'm a spirit.
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::Fiona Grant: I'm pure love, and I'm also a human being, living life in a human body.
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::Fiona Grant: in a human experience. So… and because of…
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::Fiona Grant: The, amazing construction of our human body, and that part of it has this survival response, so that if we are in any type of danger, which can be life-threatening.
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::Fiona Grant: It triggers this fear.
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::Fiona Grant: So that we can take action.
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::Fiona Grant: So, that, in essence, is who I am and where I am.
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::Jacky Clarke: I love that. Thank you so much. And I think as we go through and talk about your healing journey and where you've come from and what you've gone through, that introduction will make even more sense to people.
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::Jacky Clarke: But I literally am, like, so excited already, because I know where this is going. So, thank you so much for sharing. So…
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::Jacky Clarke: Let's take people to the start of your healing journey, then. Let's take people to the moment you realized something was wrong, the moment something had to change, like, what was the thing that you had to heal through?
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::Jacky Clarke: Yeah, let's start there.
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::Fiona Grant: Thank you, so that's a really interesting question, because I kind of think of my life in terms of
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::Fiona Grant: separate healing journeys. So, I suppose the… the particular healing journey, that particular moment for me, was actually in 2018, when I was seated in my doctor's office, and he said to me.
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::Fiona Grant: you've got type 2 diabetes. And although I'd had a blood test, and I knew that this was going to be a possibility, it still felt like this huge shock for me. You know, something that I had to try and process in the moment, something…
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::Fiona Grant: that while I was trying to process what he said to me, and what that meant to me, and how I felt about that, I had to also take on board the information that he was sharing with me, what he was telling me.
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::Fiona Grant: And so, what he said was he… his prescription for me was to lose weight.
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::Fiona Grant: Eat… eat a healthy diet, live, A healthy lifestyle.
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::Fiona Grant: And he offered me 12 weeks free at a…
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::Fiona Grant: At a diet club, and also to join the diabetes education program.
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::Fiona Grant: Now, when he said those words, lose weight, Eat healthily, live.
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::Fiona Grant: a healthy lifestyle. Now, it's really two of those words that really, you know, kind of like, hmm, lose weight. I mean, it's so easy to say those words, isn't it? You know, lose weight. It's just like I could go out there and just lose weight. It wasn't going to be…
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::Fiona Grant: You know, it wasn't going to be any effort at all, it was just something so easy to do, but for me.
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::Fiona Grant: I have struggled with my weight for 40 years. 40 years, you know, lose weight, 40 years.
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::Fiona Grant: And… over those 40 years, I had wanted to lose weight. It wasn't as if
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::Fiona Grant: I've gone over those 40 years and thought, oh, I don't… you know, my weight doesn't bother me. And if… and if it hadn't have bothered me, it wouldn't have mattered at all, but it did.
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::Fiona Grant: And so I did want to lose weight. And the,
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::Fiona Grant: So, when I was 14, my mum took me to Weight Watchers.
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::Fiona Grant: to lose weight. And…
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::Fiona Grant: That actually made me feel awful, because it was like she was saying to me, there's something wrong with your body, there's something wrong with how your body looks, you need to change how your body looks.
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::Fiona Grant: There's something wrong with you because of how your body looks. And this… and this, as I said, made me feel awful.
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::Fiona Grant: And I did actually lose the weight then.
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::Fiona Grant: And it took me a year, because then it was, like, you had to eat certain foods on Weight Watchers. There was, like, a plan that you had to follow. And after a year, I'd lost a stone.
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::Fiona Grant: And there were so many, you know, you had to eat certain foods, and there was certain foods you could not eat.
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::Fiona Grant: And…
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::Fiona Grant: before that, I would say I was a savoury girl. I was somebody who liked cheese, and with crackers. I wasn't somebody, you know, if we went out for a meal, I wasn't somebody who would, you know, have, like, a sweet pudding. I would have, oh yeah, cheese and biscuits would be great, thank you.
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::Fiona Grant: And… but… after doing Weight Watchers, I became…
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::Fiona Grant: a girl who ate sweet things. I can remember…
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::Fiona Grant: Eating a whole packet of chocolate biscuits.
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::Fiona Grant: Something that I'd never, ever done before.
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::Fiona Grant: Because it… because of what had happened over that time.
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::Fiona Grant: And… So, once I'd stopped the diet.
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::Fiona Grant: which I did, you know, I ate some foods I hated. I hated liver.
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::Fiona Grant: I absolutely… it tasted like Robert to me.
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::Fiona Grant: It's like eating rubber, although I've never eaten rubber.
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::Fiona Grant: But that's how I thought Wubba would taste.
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::Fiona Grant: And so, I… I put everything that I'd lost
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::Fiona Grant: back on much quicker than I'd lost it, and I put more on.
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::Fiona Grant: And… I swore that I would never go to another diet club again.
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::Fiona Grant: And then over those years, I tried some… tried to lose weight again, but I never reached…
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::Fiona Grant: sorry, I never lost…
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::Fiona Grant: the amount of weight that I wanted to lose before I reverted back to how I'd been eating before, and then I put all the weight back on that I'd lost, and more. And then, in my 20s.
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::Fiona Grant: I… I decided that I was going to lose weight again, because over those 40 years, there was only 2 times that I actually reached
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::Fiona Grant: my desired weight over those 40 years, only 2 times, and I'm… and how many times… I mean, loads of times, much more that I would have actually tried to lose weight than just those 2 times.
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::Fiona Grant: And to do that, I made up my own restrictive diet, because I was never going to go back to a diet club again.
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::Fiona Grant: I made up my own restrictive diet.
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::Fiona Grant: And I actually hated myself to that weight.
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::Fiona Grant: I talk to myself.
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::Fiona Grant: just in the most awful, awful, awful way. A way that you would never, ever speak to anybody else. It was actually abusive. I actually mentally abused myself to get myself to stick
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::Fiona Grant: To stick enough to that restrictive diet to actually reach My… my desired goal weight.
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::Fiona Grant: And that was kind of like the… that was, you know, that's all I was trying to get towards, was that goal weight. Nothing beyond that, just that goal weight.
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::Fiona Grant: And I can remember going to bed at night so hungry that I would lie there in bed, and I would just think about everything that I wanted to eat.
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::Fiona Grant: You know, if I could, what would I eat? And I would just lay there in bed, kind of, like, dreaming about, thinking about everything that I would eat if I could.
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::Fiona Grant: And I… I can't have been a pleasure to be around. I must have been so grumpy and so, you know, irritated with people because of, you know, what I was doing to myself and how I was talking to myself.
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::Jacky Clarke: Ugh.
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::Fiona Grant: And I, and I lost that weight.
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::Fiona Grant: But then…
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::Fiona Grant: When I actually reached that goal weight, I immediately went back to how I was eating before, and I put everything I'd lost back on, and more.
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::Fiona Grant: And then I… I tried again to lose weight, and I never got down to the amount that I wanted to before I then… before I reverted back to how I was eating before, and I put all the weight on
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::Fiona Grant: and more, until it got to a point when I decided, this is just utterly, utterly pointless, me going on diets anymore, because
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::Fiona Grant: I'm just… even if I do lose the weight, I'm… I'm not going to… I can't keep it off.
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::Fiona Grant: I cannot keep it off, so it's just pointless.
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::Fiona Grant: and going back to 2018, seated in that doctor's office, I knew that I had to do something different. I couldn't do what I'd done before and expect different things. And also, something else I wanted to say that I had forgotten to say was that
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::Fiona Grant: it wasn't… you know, my mum… my mum, when I was 14, you know, I had felt the things that I felt because she'd taken me to Weight Watchers. However, society, the media, the medical system.
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::Fiona Grant: We're all… were all telling me
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::Fiona Grant: you know, to lose weight and keep it off, you just need willpower. That's all it is. There's nothing else, you just need willpower. If you've got enough willpower, you can lose weight and keep it off. That's all it is.
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::Fiona Grant: And it made me feel like I had a character flaw. It made me feel like there was something wrong with me as a human being, that I was fundamentally flawed.
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::Fiona Grant: in some way, that I couldn't just lose… I just couldn't lose weight, and just keep it off, because…
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::Fiona Grant: I didn't have the willpower.
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::Fiona Grant: So, in 2018, seated in a doctor's office, I…
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::Fiona Grant: I knew that I had to do something different. I couldn't do what I'd done before.
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::Fiona Grant: Because if I did, I… I would… I would just… it would just be what had happened before.
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::Fiona Grant: So, luckily, thankfully, gratefully, I had been trained as an EFT practitioner.
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::Fiona Grant: And for those that don't know, EFT stands for Emotional Freedom Technique, and it… and that's also called tapping, and what tapping does is it uses the…
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::Fiona Grant: certain of the Chinese medicine acupressure points.
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::Fiona Grant: And, like, Acupuncture uses them, but acupuncture uses all of them, and it stimulates them through needles.
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::Fiona Grant: but probably as the name tapping suggests, we actually stimulate the certain acupressure points in EFT
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::Fiona Grant: Just with our fingers, just with tapping gently on our fingers.
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::Fiona Grant: Sorry, with our fingers, not on our fingers, with our fingers.
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::Fiona Grant: And… And I had been… I would say, in 2015, I'd been led
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::Fiona Grant: I'd been guided, it was synchronicity that
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::Fiona Grant: I… it was the universe, it was something greater than me that led me to this EFT training, because that hadn't been on my radar at all. Actually, previously.
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::Fiona Grant: to that.
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::Fiona Grant: an acquaintance of mine had… had actually shown me tapping, and I thought, I'm never gonna do that. Looks like she's hitting her body. You know, since learning EFT, no, that's not true.
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::Fiona Grant: They're just gently tapping on it, but to me, looking at her, it looked like she was hitting her body with her fingers, and I was like, I'm never ever going to do that.
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::Fiona Grant: And so I decided I have EFT, why don't I just apply EFT to this?
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::Fiona Grant: And that's what I did.
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::Jacky Clarke: Wow, oh my gosh. I mean…
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::Jacky Clarke: Like, there's such a… there's such a piece here for people to…
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::Jacky Clarke: I think, like, just hear and understand around…
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::Jacky Clarke: How you were talking to yourself, how society, family, everything was making you feel.
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::Jacky Clarke: And how that impacts how well you can look after yourself.
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::Jacky Clarke: Like, there's a massive direct impact of what we believe about ourselves as to how we show up in the world.
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::Jacky Clarke: And if we believe in ourselves that we are fundamentally flawed, or there's something wrong with us.
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::Jacky Clarke: That's gonna massively impact how we show up in so many areas of our life, in so many ways in the world, and…
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::Jacky Clarke: It's gonna impact what we think we are worthy of, and, you know, what we're allowed to have, and how we're allowed to behave, and…
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::Jacky Clarke: Especially with things like weight as well.
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::Jacky Clarke: There is so much media and stigma and,
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::Jacky Clarke: You know, portrayal in movies and social media and all of these places.
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::Jacky Clarke: as to, you know, well, if you're overweight, you are lazy, or if you're overweight, you're undisciplined, or if you're overweight, like, it's your choice that you've made. And a lot of the time, it's actually just education. Like, it's actually just people understanding.
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::Jacky Clarke: how their body works, and what is good for it, because as much as the media tells us, don't, you know, don't be unhealthy, everything that then feeds us from fad diets and, you know, all of these kind of, like, ways of getting healthy are all really unhealthy as well.
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::Jacky Clarke: So it's this, like, vicious circle that never really helps anyone in getting the education and learning about how they can look after themselves.
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::Jacky Clarke: So, I think it's really incredible that you not only kind of recognized, like, okay, something needs to change here, that's fine, but actually that you took a really active role in finding a way that you could do it that worked for you.
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::Jacky Clarke: So rather than just going down those very typical…
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::Jacky Clarke: you know, exercise and eating, actually you looked at what do I have available to me already, and how can I use those things to help me? I think that that is, again, like, it's just really important for people to hear, and for people to just understand that
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::Jacky Clarke: it doesn't always have to look like what you expect. Like, this journey can be so personal, and that's what makes, I think, every single person's journey, like, really important to share.
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::Jacky Clarke: So, when you were going through this, so you're in the doctor's room, you get told, you know, like, you've got diabetes.
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::Jacky Clarke: That in itself is obviously a big shock, and something that is, you know, like, now your life is gonna change, and you really need to kind of figure this all out.
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::Jacky Clarke: As you were going through that, what did you have to embrace about yourself, or, like, recognize about yourself, or accept about yourself?
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::Jacky Clarke: To actually make that journey possible, and make the change that you're now sitting with possible.
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::Fiona Grant: So, it's, it's… thank you, and it's, it's really interesting what you said.
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::Fiona Grant: as well, so I'm going to bring that in as well. So, it was,
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::Fiona Grant: I had… I had to accept that I had to use, I had to actually apply EFT. If… if I didn't apply EFT, if I didn't do something different, which in my case was the EFT,
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::Fiona Grant: I was gonna get exactly the same result.
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::Fiona Grant: as before.
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::Fiona Grant: So I, I had to apply.
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::Fiona Grant: EFT.
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::Fiona Grant: And also, that… I didn't want to do… I didn't want to do a diet where
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::Fiona Grant: I would feel so hungry that, you know, I'll go to bed, and I'd be so hungry that all I could think about was.
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::Fiona Grant: you know, what I would eat if I could. So I wasn't gonna do that. I was not gonna eat in a way where
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::Fiona Grant: I was so hungry.
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::Fiona Grant: And…
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::Fiona Grant: And also, that because of all my experience with dieting, that… those words in itself, diet and dieting, were triggering for me, so I thought of it as a healthier way of eating for me.
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::Fiona Grant: That's what I was looking for, a healthier way of eating for me. And interestingly, I just used the word looking, because at that time, I thought I was looking for it, I had to find it, that it wouldn't come to me. And it's interesting that you spoke about education, because
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::Fiona Grant: using, EFT, that would have helped me get to that place where
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::Fiona Grant: it would have kind of naturally happened by applying the EFT that I would have gotten to a place of healthier eating with my food, a place that worked for me, because that's different things for different people. Healthy and healthier means eating means different things for different people.
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::Fiona Grant: And how they relate, you know, to their food is different for different people.
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::Fiona Grant: Now…
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::Fiona Grant: I got education about food in the first time ever in the diabetes education program, which was actually very useful and very helpful, and I'm so, so grateful for the diabetes education program. However.
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::Fiona Grant: what was even more important, what actually made the difference, because even if I'd had that education, if I hadn't applied the EFT,
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::Fiona Grant: That would have just been education, because of what was going on in my body, my subconscious, my autonomic nervous system.
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::Fiona Grant: My brain itself, because consciously.
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::Fiona Grant: You know, I wanted to lose weight. My god, I wanted to lose weight. I had type 2 diabetes, and that was a really, really scary diagnosis.
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::Fiona Grant: And I didn't want to get all of the things that you can get with diabetes that can happen to you with diabetes that can shorten your life with diabetes.
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::Fiona Grant: And so I, you know, consciously, by God, I wanted to lose weight.
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::Fiona Grant: not that I hadn't wanted to lose weight over those 40 years, but in this, you know, in this moment, in 2018, I wanted to lose that weight because of the type 2 diabetes.
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::Fiona Grant: But, on the other side, so my conscious brain… the conscious is like, Like, 5 to 15%.
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::Fiona Grant: of our mind, if you like. I'm going to call it mind, but I don't really think of it as mind, but technically it's probably not mind. But I'm going to call it the mind. 5-15% of our mind, the conscious mind.
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::Fiona Grant: 80 to 90… yeah, 80-95% is our subconscious mind.
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::Fiona Grant: So, what do you think is running the show? Conscious mind, I want to lose weight. My god, I've got… I've got type 2 diabetes. I really 100% want to lose weight. Subconscious, going.
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::Fiona Grant: Well… no.
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::Fiona Grant: Because of all the programming in my brain, in my body, in my autonomic nervous system, to keep me at
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::Fiona Grant: the weight that I'm at, to keep me in the relationship with the food that I have, to keep me eating in the way that I'm eating.
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::Fiona Grant: Because the… because at a time in my past.
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::Fiona Grant: With something that was happening to me, that it…
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::Fiona Grant: that's what my survival response said, you know, food. Let's go to food. And because the brain and…
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::Fiona Grant: and the body and everything are so efficient in that way, in the way that, you know, well, it's helped in this moment. So…
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::Fiona Grant: let's just keep doing this again, and again, and again, and again. And that's why, when you get that desire to eat, be it a craving, an emotional eating, a stress eating, a binge eating, an overeating.
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::Fiona Grant: It's the only thing you can think of doing.
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::Fiona Grant: Because…
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::Fiona Grant: It's your conscious mind that is actually the last to know. Your whole body, your brain, your autonomic nervous system are all going, eat, eat, eat, eat now, now, now, now, this food now! So…
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::Fiona Grant: It's so strong, so…
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::Fiona Grant: it's… as you can hear, it goes way beyond willpower, it goes way beyond education, although, having said that, I've really found that education so, so useful, so helpful for me.
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::Fiona Grant: And did make a difference for me, but if I hadn't applied the EFT, it wouldn't have made that difference because of the programming within me.
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::Jacky Clarke: Absolutely. I think, yeah, a lot of people discount how much your nervous system actually plays a part, and a lot of people don't understand
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::Jacky Clarke: The nervous system's job, because we have this thing of, you know, fight and flight, the nervous system is there to keep you safe.
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::Jacky Clarke: Yes.
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::Jacky Clarke: But the nervous system's idea of safety is not always correct.
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::Jacky Clarke: Which I think a lot of people don't actually realize, they don't actually understand, because your nervous system could say to you, staying in this situation because we know it and it's comfortable is safe.
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::Jacky Clarke: Even if the situation isn't actually safe. So, whether it is, you know, binge eating, whether it's a relationship you're in, you know, whether it's a way that you're looking after your body, like, whether it's a substance abuse, like, whatever it is.
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::Jacky Clarke: Your nervous system goes, we know this, this is safety here.
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::Jacky Clarke: When actually, your conscious mind is looking at it going, well.
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::Jacky Clarke: No, treating your body in that way, or letting somebody else treat you in that way, or doing that thing is not actually safe, like, it's not actually getting you what you want.
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::Jacky Clarke: But your nervous system really struggles to make that definition. It really… it's not possible for it to make that definition. So, I think that thing of, like, tapping, or…
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::Jacky Clarke: Any… anything where you're actually working with your nervous system, and you're working with that kind of subconscious level to reprogram what safety is.
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::Jacky Clarke: And what that new normal, if we put that in inverted commas, because what is normal? But, you know, that new normal for you is…
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::Jacky Clarke: It then changes that dynamic of what your nervous system feels is safe.
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::Jacky Clarke: And as you change that subconscious, like, programming and that bottom layer…
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::Jacky Clarke: A lot of people will say, oh, you know, well, I've been in this situation for so long, and then, like, suddenly I got to the point where it was just so uncomfortable that I couldn't stay in it anymore.
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::Jacky Clarke: And that moment of uncomfortable is your nervous system now saying, oh, actually, we figured out that that's not safe anymore, and something else is safe, and now we're gonna push you to go there instead, and we're gonna push you to move. And it's like, it's such an interesting concept when you actually understand how the nervous system works, and that…
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::Jacky Clarke: it triggers everything. It's not your conscious brain that actually drives your nervous system, it's the other way around.
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::Jacky Clarke: It changes that whole dynamic of how you look at
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::Jacky Clarke: life, and what's possible, and why you are in the patterns that you're in, because a lot of people, I think, have that belief that
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::Jacky Clarke: There's something fundamentally wrong with them, because they can't show up in the way that other people show up.
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::Jacky Clarke: So there are people who, you know, are super healthy, go to the gym every day, like, do all of these things. And I actually read a really interesting quote the other day, from Alex Hormozy, who's an influencer, but also runs gyms, like, that's his industry.
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::Jacky Clarke: And he was talking about this idea of discipline, and saying, you know, when people come to the gym and they want to lose weight.
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::Jacky Clarke: personal trainers get really annoyed, because they're like, why don't these people have discipline? Like, why don't they come at 5am when they're supposed to? And Alex Hormozy was saying to them.
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::Jacky Clarke: you're missing the point. Like, you're missing the point here. And the personal trainers were saying, no, well, you know, we're disciplined, we get here at 5 o'clock in the morning.
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::Jacky Clarke: And he said to them, no, you guys aren't disciplined. You guys enjoy getting here at 5 in the morning.
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::Jacky Clarke: it's something you like. You are not taking yourself out of your comfort zone to do this thing. It's something that is natural to you. So actually, you wouldn't be a personal trainer if you didn't like coming to the gym, if you didn't like working out, if you didn't like being in this space, if you didn't like being healthy, like, you wouldn't be in this space.
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::Jacky Clarke: he was like, actually, what would be really uncomfortable for you, and you pushing yourself out of your comfort zone, like, go do that thing regularly, and then come and talk to me about discipline of people who struggle to get into the gym. And it was, like, this such an interesting concept that actually
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::Jacky Clarke: everyone's idea of discipline, or hard, or easy, or, you know, whatever concept, whatever words you want to use, are completely different. Everyone's relationship with their bodies, everyone's relationship with their minds, their nervous system, like, it's completely different every… for every single person.
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::Jacky Clarke: So I think, like, that as well is, like, such an important thing for people to remember.
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::Jacky Clarke: as they go through this journey, like, you can't look at somebody else and go, why am I not like that? Or why can't I do what they do, or why isn't it as easy for me? You know, like, it's so easy to look and compare, isn't it? Like, social media has taught us to do that. It literally is what was programmed into us.
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::Jacky Clarke: And I guess, like, I know you were talking as you were going through, like, before the doctor's appointment, there were multiple times where you tried, and it didn't work, and, you know, it worked to a degree, and then, you know, got worse, etc.
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::Jacky Clarke: Once you'd had that doctor's appointment.
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::Jacky Clarke: And you'd decided, obviously, okay, new, healthier way of living and eating, we're gonna do tapping, like, we've, you know, we're gonna go on this education program, we're gonna do all of these things.
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::Jacky Clarke: Were there moments from that point to now where it was still really, really hard?
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::Jacky Clarke: And you didn't think that it was gonna work, and you didn't think that it was… or, like, was that kind of, like, the line in the sand at the turning point?
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::Fiona Grant: Hello?
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::Fiona Grant: 2018, when I decided to apply EFT to it, I didn't know if it was going to work.
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::Fiona Grant: I had no idea, but I knew I had to do something different, and I had this tool.
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::Fiona Grant: And, you know, I had… I've heard all these things in my training about how it… how it could work, what, you know, all the areas that… different areas of life that EFT can help with. So, I… I knew it could help.
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::Fiona Grant: But I didn't know… I didn't know if it would help with this. I didn't know if it would help enough with this.
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::Fiona Grant: But…
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::Fiona Grant: I would say… and there were times over the course of losing the weight, because it, you know, it was…
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::Fiona Grant: It was my natural state, it was a natural state for my subconscious, my body, to, you know, tell me to eat this food.
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::Fiona Grant: you know, to tell me to eat… and not only to tell me to eat certain… sorry, to tell me to eat certain foods, but to tell me to eat a lot of those certain foods. So, you know, when that would come up, I was using tapping.
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::Fiona Grant: So… so it wasn't like I decided, and then I never… I never desired.
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::Fiona Grant: to eat the food. You know, I just… I just went and lost the weight, and I never had… no, that… that isn't what happened. You know, I… that… those… because that was all programmed for 4… 40 years.
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::Fiona Grant: It was all programmed in my nervous system.
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::Fiona Grant: So… so I had those times. However, there was one time that, that did actually derail me.
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::Fiona Grant: Now…
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::Fiona Grant: before… before I share with you what that time was, I just want to put it in context a bit. So, in 2019, I'd lost over 5 stone, and for those that don't speak in stone, that's over 70 pounds over 31.75 kilos.
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::Fiona Grant: And over the time of losing weight, I had some
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::Fiona Grant: big life events, challenges happen… happening. For example, I was there for my mum, supporting her in every way that I could, in any way that I could.
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::Fiona Grant: After my dad passed away.
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::Fiona Grant: And also, after I lost the weight, there were also big life challenges. My mum had lung cancer.
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::Fiona Grant: So it wasn't as if there were no, you know, really big challenges going on over this time. However.
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::Fiona Grant: Over the Christmas holiday season in 2019, my mum passed away.
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::Fiona Grant: And on the day that my mum passed away.
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::Fiona Grant: I had to go food shopping, because I… basically, I'd run out of food, and… and it just happened, the day she passed away, it was the day that I was…
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::Fiona Grant: Designated to go.
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::Fiona Grant: And, I'm… I'm…
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::Fiona Grant: I wasn't going to share this bit, but I am. So, I went there, and, you know, my mum had just passed away. I was going… I was going into the supermarket to do food shopping, because I had to.
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::Fiona Grant: And, and then, as I walked there, there was this lovely, on a… on a stand.
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::Fiona Grant: you know, where you have lots of kind of things on it. There was this plaque that said Angel, and my mum always used to call me her angel.
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::Fiona Grant: And then when I was walking, down a clothes aisle to get somewhere, I don't remember where I had to go to, but I'm walking down this clothes aisle, and there was this…
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::Fiona Grant: top that said, lovely girl, and my mum would always say to me, you know, call me lovely girl.
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::Fiona Grant: So it was like these were two messages for me, from my mum.
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::Fiona Grant: However… this… this hit me so hard. It was… The grief was overwhelming.
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::Fiona Grant: And at the time, I didn't realize that, actually, I think I was also trying to process the grief for my dad, too, because when my dad passed away, as I said.
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::Fiona Grant: I wanted to be there and support my mum in any way that I could, in any way she needed me to. But also, I decided I was going to be strong for her.
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::Fiona Grant: So, so that she could, you know, go through all the emotions, so she could experience that all.
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::Fiona Grant: So that she could process it all. And so I hadn't… I hadn't grieved for him fully.
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::Fiona Grant: So, there I was, my mum had passed, and also I was… it was now time to grieve for my dad. I… that wasn't a conscious thought.
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::Fiona Grant: that was what was coming up for me. And so what I did was I returned to my old way of eating.
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::Fiona Grant: Not only did I return to my old way of eating, I also, drank lots of white wine. That was, that was my, that was another way I like to drink, so I drank lots of white wine.
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::Fiona Grant: And also, watch lots of TV. I mean, I was somebody, and I still am somebody who loved to read, and… and really, the way I truly relax, one of the ways I truly relax is sitting and reading a fiction book. That's really lovely and relaxing for me, but I couldn't even read.
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::Fiona Grant: the only things I could do to… to find any comfort to escape those overwhelming… to try and escape, try and process whatever
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::Fiona Grant: My system, my body, my subconscious was trying to help me do.
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::Fiona Grant: I used food, white wine, and TV.
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::Fiona Grant: And And that went on until my clothes started to feel uncomfortably tight.
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::Fiona Grant: And I, over that time, I put on 26 pounds. And it was a short time, I think.
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::Fiona Grant: I'm not… I think it was around 2 months.
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::Fiona Grant: And I put on £26 pounds.
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::Fiona Grant: However, There were also huge differences to before.
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::Fiona Grant: So, this time, when my… my clothes felt uncomfortable… comfortably tight, I didn't just think, I'll go and buy some new, you know, new clothes. It was, I'm just going to go back to how I was eating.
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::Fiona Grant: Before, and when I went back to how I was eating before, and I was still grieving, you know, we're talking 2, you know, around 2 months, so I was still grieving, I was still processing, trying to process all of that.
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::Fiona Grant: And…
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::Fiona Grant: they… I felt relief. I actually felt relief at returning to this healthier way of eating. And I'd never felt that before, I'd never experienced that before. It was just…
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::Fiona Grant: It was just an… it was an incredible feeling.
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::Fiona Grant: And… also, I… And I also… I know there was something else as well.
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::Fiona Grant: But, maybe it'll come back to me. But the other thing was that I decided that I would…
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::Fiona Grant: that I would like to get some more advanced training.
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::Fiona Grant: When… when the right training came up.
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::Fiona Grant: And when I financially could, I decided that that I wanted to…
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::Fiona Grant: to do that, as well. And, again, synchronicity, the universe, the power greater than me.
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::Fiona Grant: it all came up and lined up, and I mean, that, I think, has taken how I can help people with their weight to a new level.
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::Fiona Grant: And then… than I did.
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::Fiona Grant: before.
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::Jacky Clarke: Oh my gosh.
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::Jacky Clarke: Thank you so much for sharing that, that's… grief is such a hard thing in itself, like…
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::Jacky Clarke: it has so many impacts that a lot… I think, yeah, if you've not gone through grief, it's really hard to…
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::Jacky Clarke: explain how it affects all of the aspects, but I think that that is…
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::Jacky Clarke: Yeah, it's so… it's so incredible to hear that shift in…
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::Jacky Clarke: like, that's when you know that the healthy lifestyle has taken hold. You actually felt relief to go back to it, rather than it being…
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::Jacky Clarke: like, when you were dieting before, and it was like, as soon as you stop, you go back to how you were eating before, and then, you know, it's, you know, balloon weight again, and it's such a different impact. I think that's…
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::Jacky Clarke: That's so incredible, it literally gave me goosebumps when you were talking about it, like, I think that that's just amazing.
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::Jacky Clarke: Because that's really when something is fundamentally changed.
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::Jacky Clarke: Like… When actually going back to it makes you feel such relief, and…
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::Jacky Clarke: that's really, really incredible to be able to shift your life like that. I think, again, a lot of people don't…
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::Jacky Clarke: realize how much work it takes to make these big fundamental shifts, like, they are actually really…
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::Jacky Clarke: challenging. Like, this is why, for so many people.
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::Jacky Clarke: dieting doesn't work, because it's not actually a fundamental shift. It's a restriction for a short period of time. Like, it's not actually a fundamental life change. So, I think that that's really, really incredible, and it kind of leads nicely onto, like, the next question, which is this idea of, like.
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::Jacky Clarke: What was your biggest outlook change in life?
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::Jacky Clarke: From where you were before to where you are now.
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::Jacky Clarke: Was… was there, like, one thing, like, one belief, or one sort of, like, thought process that, like, really fundamentally changed for you?
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::Jacky Clarke: As you were going through this process.
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::Fiona Grant: I think the biggest outlook change was that
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::Fiona Grant: because of how… how I saw and experienced, you know, my relationship with food, my relationship with food changing, you know, like…
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::Fiona Grant: I was somebody… so, for example, I was somebody who, before, had to have bread every, every day. If I didn't have bread, I would be like, oh, I just couldn't. I had to have bread. I just couldn't not have bread. I had to have bread.
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::Fiona Grant: And, I remember… Realizing, you know, like.
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::Fiona Grant: like, 3 weeks had passed, and I hadn't had any bread. I hadn't… I hadn't thought about bread. It hadn't even occurred to me. There's, like, in the supermarket I go into, there is… they do have a, you know, fresh baking, so you do get the smell.
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::Fiona Grant: Of bread, or cakes, or you do get that smell, and…
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::Fiona Grant: I mean, I hadn't even noticed, you know, I hadn't even, you know, I hadn't even noticed that smell, it hadn't, you know, made me think, I wish I could eat.
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::Fiona Grant: you know, let's buy some bread, I want to have some bread. I just realized, and I still, I wasn't bothered. I wasn't bothered at all. And I also…
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::Fiona Grant: Another food I noticed that with was I had to eat potatoes every day as well.
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::Fiona Grant: for what… for… I had to have potatoes for my evening meal, every, every day.
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::Fiona Grant: And again, there was, like… I just suddenly realized that at 3 weeks, I hadn't had any potatoes. I hadn't missed them, I hadn't thought about them.
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::Fiona Grant: So, you know, there was all these kind of changes that I was experiencing as I applied the EFT, and that was shifting my experience with
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::Fiona Grant: food and my… and eating. And actually, there's… And also,
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::Fiona Grant: there was a… this was actually… there was a later shift, which was after I'd lost the weight, and when I was actually, after I'd put that 26…
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::Fiona Grant: pounds on again, and I returned to my healthy eating, and I was losing the weight.
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::Fiona Grant: I was losing the weight again. And, when I weighed myself.
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::Fiona Grant: I was at this kind of strange weight loss plateau, and by that, I mean
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::Fiona Grant: I would lose… I would lose a pound, I would put on two pounds. I would lose a pound, I would put on a pound, and it was kind of like this weird fluctuating thing. This was going on for weeks, and I was eating… I was eating healthily.
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::Fiona Grant: for me. I was eating in my healthier way of eating.
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::Fiona Grant: And it was just strange, you know? You would have thought, I… I should have lost some… I should have lost weight. It wasn't…
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::Fiona Grant: Wasn't doing anything that… meant I shouldn't have lost weight. And,
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::Fiona Grant: the thought came up to me, so I'd obviously been tapping, over this time as well, and the thought came up to me. I was in the bathroom washing my hands one day, and the thought came up to me.
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::Fiona Grant: You know, you've told yourself that when you lose that weight.
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::Fiona Grant: You're… you're… you're going to… you're gonna get out there and help other people.
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::Fiona Grant: With their weight.
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::Fiona Grant: So that was… so there's, like, this subconscious in a conflict.
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::Fiona Grant: That we can call it. So, you know, there was part of me that…
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::Fiona Grant: really wanted to help other… other women, because of what I'd been through, through. I knew how it felt, and I really wanted to help. And then there was this other part of me, the part that, as you used words, wanted to keep me safe, because for some reason it saw unsafety in this.
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::Fiona Grant: This was unfamiliar, doing that.
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::Fiona Grant: And it was like, you know.
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::Fiona Grant: well, no, let's hold on to that weight. Let's just hold on to it. And so, as soon as I tapped on it.
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::Fiona Grant: That was it. It just… it just went down.
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::Fiona Grant: So… so those… so that's what I was experiencing. And so, this showed me absolutely that it was nothing to do with willpower.
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::Fiona Grant: It… 100%, nothing to do with willpower. It showed… it went way beyond that. It showed me that it was never a character flaw.
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::Fiona Grant: I mean, if you go… and even beyond that, if we go back to, previous times, like with the… the artist Reuben.
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::Fiona Grant: it was all about the curvy woman. That was what was healthy. So it's…
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::Fiona Grant: It's kind of like, what was acceptable body shape?
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::Fiona Grant: And body size at the time.
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::Fiona Grant: And…
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::Fiona Grant: it just, you know, it showed me that it… no way was it a character fall. No way did it say anything
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::Fiona Grant: Anything about me as a human being.
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::Fiona Grant: that my abilities and who I was, or what I could do.
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::Fiona Grant: Never said anything about me as a person.
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::Fiona Grant: It was nothing to do with us at all.
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::Jacky Clarke: I love that. And that really… that was the really huge outlook change.
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::Fiona Grant: for me.
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::Jacky Clarke: Yeah, I love that. I absolutely love that. I think that that is…
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::Jacky Clarke: such an incredible, like, such an incredible shift as an outlook shift, because…
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::Jacky Clarke: As you said, like, the whole time that you speak meanly to yourself.
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::Jacky Clarke: you are making it more difficult for yourself to have the life that you want, and I think, like, so many people don't…
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::Jacky Clarke: notice… That idea of… The outside world doesn't change.
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::Jacky Clarke: If your nervous system isn't ready for it to change.
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::Jacky Clarke: Because you won't be able to take the actions or do the things that you need to do.
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::Jacky Clarke: Because you will be, you know, however you want to describe it, procrastinating, you know, being self-destructive, like, however you want to describe it, whatever that form of not moving takes for you.
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::Jacky Clarke: If your nervous system is not in alignment and you don't feel safe.
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::Jacky Clarke: that's always gonna be the case. So I think, like, that is really, really incredible. And I know, like, you've already, you've already kind of, like, indicated, obviously, you wanted to move over and start helping women in this space as well. So, what was that journey like of, okay, you've now done the thing.
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::Jacky Clarke: and now you're gonna help other people, you know, almost make this, like, your work. Like, how… how did that journey go for you?
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::Fiona Grant: I'm actually going to have to go back slightly.
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::Jacky Clarke: For this. So.
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::Fiona Grant: As… I would say, as a young person, I was always interested in what made people tick.
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::Fiona Grant: You know, what made them tick? Not, not, not, not their human body, but what made them tick in how they thought, how they saw the world, what actions they took, what actions they didn't take.
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::Fiona Grant: you know, it was really interested me. So, in… so in my 20s, as a mature student, I went back to university, and I did a degree in psychology. And what… at the time, what I would have really liked to have done was actually, you know, work with people one-on-one.
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::Fiona Grant: But…
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::Fiona Grant: I knew that there was no way that I could do that, because I wasn't in a… I wasn't in a space.
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::Fiona Grant: that I, as a human being, that I could hold the space. I mean, at the time, I didn't know that that actually was what I meant.
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::Fiona Grant: But I couldn't be there. It's like, I couldn't be there for that person in the way that they needed me to be. And it's true, at that time, I couldn't have been there. I wouldn't have been able to be there.
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::Fiona Grant: So that was true.
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::Fiona Grant: Absolutely. And if we fast forward to, I would say, probably around my 30s sometime,
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::Fiona Grant: Okay, so I… so I… so we're going on to the spiritual here. So, I came across the angels.
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::Fiona Grant: So, and by angels, I mean celestial beings.
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::Fiona Grant: So, it was, my mum lent me a book.
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::Fiona Grant: about the angels.
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::Fiona Grant: and I read it, and I thought, well, you know, if the range… if the angels are really real, that would be wonderful, but…
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::Fiona Grant: That might just be a fairy tale.
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::Fiona Grant: for adults. But… Over time, they proved to me, they showed me that they were real.
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::Fiona Grant: And why I'm telling you this is because there came a point… so they…
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::Fiona Grant: They would guide me, they would work with me, like in a meditation, and they would take me through healings that would work with my energy and my body.
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::Fiona Grant: Sorry, I think I'm just gonna cough.
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::Fiona Grant: So I'm just going to take a bit of a sip of drink, because I think I'm going to cough.
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::Fiona Grant: Sorry, I'm gonna cough.
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::Fiona Grant: Something about that.
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::Jacky Clarke: Don't worry about it.
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::Fiona Grant: So… and they took me through this… this healing.
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::Fiona Grant: And… And then one day, I was actually, I was actually on the toilet.
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::Fiona Grant: And,
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::Fiona Grant: they showed me that, although I thought I had this big heart, and, you know, I could love, I could really love, I had this big, big heart, my heart was only open this little, little bit. So, yeah, just really tiny, tiny bit.
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::Fiona Grant: And that was a huge surprise, that was a huge shock.
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::Fiona Grant: And so, you know, they took me through lots of heart healing, they worked with me.
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::Fiona Grant: a lot on that, so that I… I became… so I could become the person, so my nervous system, my body, my subconscious… and I didn't know this all at the time, because this was before
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::Fiona Grant: this was before EFT, way before EFT. So,
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::Fiona Grant: And so I became that person who could hold that space, who could be there
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::Fiona Grant: those people in the way that they needed. So, I was in the place that I could.
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::Fiona Grant: do this. Now, with EFT, there are so many different areas that it can help people with.
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::Fiona Grant: And in 2019, I had this mentor who took me through this process to help me
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::Fiona Grant: to find out, you know, in which area my heart truly lies. And, you know, I wasn't thinking weight loss. I mean, I know I'd lost my weight, but
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::Fiona Grant: I wasn't thinking weight loss at that time, I wasn't…
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::Fiona Grant: what I was thinking. It wasn't even on my… on my radar as a way.
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::Fiona Grant: To help people in 2019.
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::Fiona Grant: And… And it led to that I wanted to help… that I wanted to help women who had been…
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::Fiona Grant: Struggling for years with a weight… who wanted to lose weight.
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::Fiona Grant: Who either couldn't lose weight, they couldn't lose enough weight, or if they did lose the weight, they would put it back on again.
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::Fiona Grant: And so, I thought after this.
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::Fiona Grant: yes, I've done this for myself, but can I do it? Can I help other people?
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::Fiona Grant: So I decided to test that out. And luckily, I had access to a community of other EFT practitioners and EFT students, so I reached out.
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::Fiona Grant: and asked for volunteers, and I got loads and loads of volunteers to have four free sessions with me.
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::Fiona Grant: And… and the… the answer to my question, you know, my own question for myself that came back was yes, and a resounding yes, I could 100% help.
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::Fiona Grant: Make a true, real difference, because that was so important to me, to make a true, real difference.
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::Fiona Grant: And from those… from those volunteers, I got my first two paying clients.
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::Jacky Clarke: That's incredible! I love that, oh my gosh!
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::Jacky Clarke: And that was the start of…
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::Jacky Clarke: The new business, the new way of working, the new purpose, like, that's absolutely incredible.
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::Jacky Clarke: Wow.
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::Jacky Clarke: Oh my gosh.
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::Jacky Clarke: I love, like.
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::Jacky Clarke: I always feel like, especially, for women, like, I'm sure it's… I'm sure it's the same for men, but I obviously work with women predominantly in my business. But I always feel that…
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::Jacky Clarke: Women are so good at going through something hard and then teaching it.
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::Jacky Clarke: You know, going through really understanding… it's not theory, it's not…
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::Jacky Clarke: Oh, well, I read this in a book once. It's very much like, I've experienced this. I know, I can take you through this, I can help you with this.
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::Jacky Clarke: And it's a very different way of showing up in the world and, you know, sharing something with the world, so I think that that is absolutely incredible. I think every woman should own her own business, so, I'm always so pleased when guests have actually taken what they've learned and they're actually doing something with it. I think that that's amazing.
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::Jacky Clarke: Okay, so…
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::Jacky Clarke: Let's take it down to practicalities, then. So if we had a guest that is listening now, who is struggling.
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::Jacky Clarke: Weight, body image, you know, anything within this realm of your expertise.
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::Jacky Clarke: What would your advice be for them as they go through this journey?
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::Fiona Grant: I think it would be…
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::Fiona Grant: it would be on a number of levels, and I think it would depend on
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::Fiona Grant: What this… what their particular… Situation with their weight is.
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::Fiona Grant: But even just, you know, just tapping.
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::Fiona Grant: just… just tapping itself can… can help. Sorry, if you can hear anything, that's because I'm actually tapping.
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::Fiona Grant: I can't say tapping without tapping. So I think that… that would help itself.
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::Fiona Grant: if you've struggled for years with it, I would recommend getting help with it, because it can be very, very hard to see
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::Fiona Grant: Our own blind spots, you know, our own where…
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::Fiona Grant: where those subconscious, like, call blocks and barriers to us reaching
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::Fiona Grant: Where we want to be with our weight, and staying there.
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::Fiona Grant: And… so you can go that route. And also, there… there will be, because there will be… I'm not the only practitioner who… who uses EFT
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::Fiona Grant: of a way, there are others. And they will have… some of them will have, like, free… free videos that you can tap along with.
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::Fiona Grant: And I…
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::Fiona Grant: The tapping solution on YouTube, I know that Jessica Altner herself has lost weight, and she actually wrote a book about, using EFT for weight loss and body confidence. So that… so that is, you know, that is one… that is one route going
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::Fiona Grant: And, and taking a look.
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::Fiona Grant: at the book. However, I will say that weight loss when you've been struggling for years is complex.
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::Fiona Grant: So, you know, I would recommend getting help with it, even if it's not me.
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::Fiona Grant: There are other… other people out there.
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::Fiona Grant: That can help.
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::Fiona Grant: But if that's not a route you want to take, or if that's not a route you can take at this time, there is the book. And there is also… I'm pretty sure that Jessica will have some tapping videos about weight on the Tapping Solution YouTube channel, so you might like to have a look at those.
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::Fiona Grant: I know Barad Yates is all… now, he's actually… he does it on everything, so it's… so he might have some on weight, or body image.
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::Fiona Grant: And that's Brad, Brad Yates, a YouTube channel.
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::Fiona Grant: So that is… that's what's… that's what I'm thinking at the moment.
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::Jacky Clarke: Amazing. I love, yeah, I love being able to give people resources. I think that that's so incredible. And I will obviously link people to your Instagram and, you know, let people come over and, engage with you as well, so obviously if they have any questions, they can come and talk to you, which I think is so, so important.
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::Jacky Clarke: But we've got one final question for the podcast. It's my favorite question that I love asking people, and that is your next personal level of healing. So what does your next level, what are you working on at the moment?
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::Jacky Clarke: now that you've kind of gotten to where you are, you've gotten to this goal weight, am I correct in saying that you've healed your type 2 diabetes?
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::Fiona Grant: Yes, yes, I'm… I'm… I'm no longer… at the end of 2018, after I'd lost a certain amount of weight, and I can't remember what it… exactly what that… how much I'd lost, but…
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::Fiona Grant: I then moved into the… I was in the normal
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::Fiona Grant: normal blood sugar level, and I've been there since.
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::Jacky Clarke: Wow, I mean, that in itself is incredible, like, well done, that's literally so amazing. But, like, so what is your next level of healing? Like, what… you've done all these amazing things already, like, what's next for you?
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::Fiona Grant: Thank you, thank you. And before I answer that question, just to say I don't actually have an Instagram.
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::Fiona Grant: I'm not actually on Instagram, but they can reach me through my website instead.
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::Jacky Clarke: We'll include that below.
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::Fiona Grant: Thank you. So, for me, now, it's really interesting that you were saying about, going, I think, at the beginning of our conversation there, about how much, you know, that feeling… that feeling of having a character flaw, being fundamentally flawed.
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::Fiona Grant: would affect everything in your life, and that is true. So, although
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::Fiona Grant: There's part of me that absolutely knows and has experienced it when I've worked with people.
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::Fiona Grant: how much I can truly, truly help them.
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::Fiona Grant: So, you know, it… you know, consciously, I know that, but then there… there are these other parts, that…
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::Fiona Grant: That, are running in my subconscious, that…
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::Fiona Grant: instead of me going out there and actually proactively letting people know that I exist and how I can help.
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::Fiona Grant: I'm in so much avoidance of actually doing anything to do with that. I am just busy doing loads of other stuff.
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::Fiona Grant: In my business. You know, any of the stuff to actually do, that I've got lists of.
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::Fiona Grant: To actually do, to get myself out there more.
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::Fiona Grant: allow more people to know that I exist and how I can help.
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::Fiona Grant: they just don't get done. So that is what I'm actually working on at this moment, is… is working through, and there's so many levels and layers for me here.
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::Fiona Grant: with this.
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::Fiona Grant: so that I can, you know, get out there and help even more women, which…
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::Fiona Grant: you know, a huge part of me would love to do, because I know how it feels.
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::Jacky Clarke: Yeah, 100%. I mean, I just want to say welcome to being an entrepreneur.
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::Fiona Grant: Thank you.
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::Jacky Clarke: It's a… it's a feeling that all of us go through, and again, like, I think it's really, really good to just, like, normalize that feeling when you… when you run a business.
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::Jacky Clarke: you will constantly question, even when you've got core proof that you can help people. Like, I have days where I question myself, and I'm a decade in, like…
460
::Jacky Clarke: It's absolutely normal. So, yeah, I think, like, yeah, that's… oh my gosh, it's such a… it's such a normal thing. But I think, again, like, it's so important…
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::Jacky Clarke: for us to continue on the healing journey, to continue to see and, like, hold up that mirror and say, like, okay, this is what is coming up for me, and this is what I need to do in this space, and this is how I can heal more deeply in this space, and…
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::Jacky Clarke: running your own business and being an entrepreneur is, in my mind, like, the biggest personal development journey you'll ever go on, because you are holding up mirrors in, like, every direction possible.
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::Jacky Clarke: So I think that that is, you know, it doesn't surprise me that that is your next level of healing. Like, it doesn't surprise me that that's the thing. I think it's absolutely incredible.
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::Jacky Clarke: And it's just been so wonderful to have you on the podcast and to talk about this topic. Like, we've not had somebody speak about their weight specifically in this way, and I think that it's, like, it just makes me so happy when we can bring guests on
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::Jacky Clarke: In all of these different areas, and actually give voice to all of these issues that people face, because
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::Jacky Clarke: I know that there will be people listening who are struggling, or have struggled, or, you know, if you're listening and you know somebody who's in this space, like, share the episode with them, like, make sure that people know that they're not alone on this journey, because it can…
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::Jacky Clarke: You know, any healing journey can feel so isolating and so difficult when you're in it yourself, and you don't have that…
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::Jacky Clarke: Access to a community who potentially understand what you're going through, so…
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::Jacky Clarke: Fiona, it's been an absolute, like, pleasure to have you. I will share your website below, and make sure that people can contact you. Obviously, you've given us some really incredible resources as well, which I hope that people will be able to jump into.
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::Jacky Clarke: But thank you so much for taking the time and being on the podcast with us today.
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::Fiona Grant: Thank you, thank you so much, Jackie, for having me. It's been my pleasure to chat with you and your listeners. Thank you.
