Shownotes
Talking Supernatural Season 7, Episode 16 Out with the Old. Diana explains how gross toe shoes really are. Liz explains how to exorcise a cursed object - hint it involves littering.
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Transcripts
Welcome to this week's episode of Devil's Trap podcast. I'm Diana.
Bitch (:I'm Liz. I was way far away from anything, sorry. I'm Liz, hello.
Jerk (:And this week we're going to talk season 7 episode 16 out with the old.
Bitch (:with the old. That's what we do with the old. We don't. We keep our old.
Jerk (:keep our old. Oh, oh well.
Bitch (:How are you doing? So I know we like just saw each other, but it feels like forever, but it's been a very strange week. A lot of things have happened.
Jerk (:It's been a weird week since we've seen each other. Yeah. So I guess, um, so since we recorded the last, we saw each other after that. And then immediately, I know I can't, I can't like process days. I saw, we got to see each other. I got to go see green hall, which is a legacy venue in Texas and then hang out with Liz. And then we had bacon waffles and they were delicious.
Bitch (:Yes, because it'll be recorded on Monday. Yeah.
Jerk (:And we watched Transylvania 6 5000, which if you haven't seen it, you should. And then I'll be coming out on a podcast in the next week or so with it for with D magazine. It's one of the things I've done in the last week is my fun update. D Magazine, Ear Burner podcast. I'll be a guest on there talking about my work and an upcoming show with. No, not talking about these.
Bitch (:Hehehe
Bitch (:the big D.
Bitch (:not talking about D's. I thought that the whole, the show, that's not what it's about. It's not about D's. That would be great if they had like a sub side one that is just about Dallas D's.
Jerk (:That's not what D magazine's about, not about D's. It's about Dallas. But I'm with my friend.
Jerk (:Things that start with D in Dallas. And then I was just dicks, you know. And then I was on there with my buddy Joshua Ray Walker, who's a great Dallas based, but Texas musician. Then I saw Shaky Graves, a Texas artist, but at the Longhorn Ballroom. And it was a really, really great show. And then Babe got home after his long, long trip.
Bitch (:No, just dicks. No. Yeah.
Jerk (:And then we did a lot of Halloween shit, carved pumpkins and dressed up and all kinds of fun. So yeah, that's my story.
Bitch (:Yes, you had many costumes. You were a Google town member.
Jerk (:I did have two. I was supposed to be a dead cowgirl, and I realized I looked like the lost member of ghoul town, which is fine. It's just funny. That was my daytime costume. And then, uh.
Bitch (:That's a good look!
You know, I've tried really hard to get that look on purpose sometimes. I've never been able to achieve it. So apparently that's just what you just have to say. I want to be a dead cow girl. And there you go.
Jerk (:I mean...
Jerk (:Yeah, sometimes you just have to do that. And then I think he came home and was a vampire bat because it was an excuse to wear a fucking onesie, which is cozy.
Bitch (:Yes, it was very cozy and we finally had a weather flip, although we are in the wonderful Texas series or Texas weather report where the heater is on in the morning because it's 40 degrees, but then by like three o'clock in the afternoon, it's like 80. It's, it's not, it's not right. It's not good for my heating and air conditioning systems and things.
Jerk (:Hmm.
Jerk (:Hmm
Bitch (:So.
Jerk (:Well, it has been that flip here too, but I don't like the cold. So kind of sucks for me.
Bitch (:I'm not a huge fan of where it is right now, but we're gonna get some nice, I think some nice spring, autumn like things this weekend. So anyways, and so Halloween sadly is over. It is Dia de los Muertos and I went to Muertos Fest in San Antonio this weekend, which was nice to do something that was just, you know.
Jerk (:Yeah.
Jerk (:Yes.
Bitch (:It was good, but you know, what was really hysterical is just this world. You can look at it two ways. So I was like, Hey, I'm going to go out and get, give myself like a nice dinner at this restaurant that I love and I haven't eaten that since I moved back. And I, I can, I know I can walk to the fest from there. So I was like, Oh, you'll Uber down there because a new parking was going to be a nightmare. And.
Since I was eating by myself, I go and I sit at the bar and I look over in the next room and then I see my cousin's husband and I'm just like, God damn it. Like I can literally not have like, I just want to, I was like, I want to have a quiet like meal alone. And then, and then eventually like, you know, talk to my cousin and I was sitting with the lovely owner who was amazing.
And my cousin was like, if you wanted a quiet evening, like you shouldn't be sitting next to her because she's a real chatty lady. And he was just like, I just don't want to talk to my family. There's a difference. Like, talking to this lovely elderly woman is much more interesting than talking to my lovely elderly mother that I talk to all the time. It's like I just wanted something different, different conversation if I had to have one.
Jerk (:Ah.
Jerk (:Yeah.
Bitch (:Uh, we're just fast was really good and it was very Peewee Herman oriented. I don't, I don't.
Jerk (:That's amazing. And I saw it was shared on both on the Pee Wee Herman, whoever is managing Pee Wee Herman social media now, since Paul Rubin's passing, it was shared on there, all the amazing honors to Pee Wee Herman from San Antonio. It was really cool to see that. Because you had sent me a couple pictures while you were there. And then I follow all the Pee Wee Herman stuff because I love him.
Bitch (:Thank you.
Bitch (:Yeah, so.
Bitch (:Yeah, I found there was at least five altars I got pictures of there may have been I think there may have been one more, but they were all really cool. And you know, it's those things are like, I know they're supposed to be happy, but they also make me sad. And but so which is, you know, and that's today, right? So the same makes me happy. The day makes me sad. So, so happy, you know, happy day of the dead or whatever you celebrate, you know.
Jerk (:They're supposed to do both, I think.
Bitch (:Remember your ancestors. It's a good thing. And your friends and keep their memories alive. And, but not this way. Well, maybe this way. I don't know. So we're talking about out with the old, this was season seven, episode 16, like that transition. Is that a good one? Yeah. Okay. All right. So look, yeah, I know.
Jerk (:All the things. Yes.
Jerk (:That was good. That was really slick. I'm very impressed. Look, it's like we know what we're doing.
Bitch (:And so this was first aired March 16th, 2012, and it was directed by John F. Showalter. The last time we saw him direct was Slash Fiction and written by Jenny Klein, who I really like. That was, you know, the once writer's assistant becomes writer and then becomes just boss bitch extraordinaire, but also co-authored by Robert Singer. So I think that's interesting. And still a reminder of us is season seven and Sarah is the show runner right now. So you can...
Jerk (:Mm-hmm.
Bitch (:her influence is in a bit of this, right? Because we are, I think, gonna see the big bad storyline starting to come back again, because we, you know, the big bad is about, right? So we've been focusing a lot on Bobby's death and what's going on with that. And we kind of have, the big mouse have just been a lot of Dean going, Frank, what's going on?
Jerk (:Mm-hmm. It's been gone for a few episodes now.
Jerk (:Frank, tell me about some dick.
Bitch (:Yeah. And then I have come up with some new theories about Frank and Dean. Frank and Dean, Dean's and Frank. They don't want me to hot dog. Okay. So we're going to start off with these skinny bitches. And I'm so jealous of all of you because you pretty little ballerinas, your shoes and your cute little leg warmers. Y'all look adorable.
Jerk (:Franks and deans.
Jerk (:Yeah, but they leave out the joy of what their feet look like here. Because these are point dancers. So, uh, oh yeah. So gross.
Bitch (:Oh no, their feet are gross. They're so gross. But they're tough, bad bitches. That's what, they are like chain smoking, drinking Diet Coke, they're not eating anything. These girls look surprisingly healthy. They were not actually ballerinas. These were just very cute girls in ballerina outfits. Maybe they were dancers, but.
Jerk (:probably accurate.
Jerk (:Well, they're a little snarky. There's a arena is late and no showed for practice. And they are being a little snarky about it. But arena shows up on her own late, putting on her pointe shoes. These pointe shoes are pristine. Did you ever did you did you do dance growing up at all or anything like that? Like much pointer and do pointe?
Bitch (:No, my parents just kept me in the woods.
Jerk (:I didn't think you did. So I did dance like my sister and I did dance. I actually took point for one year. Once one year.
Bitch (:Yeah. Oh, I didn't know you did point. That's crazy. Oh my God, you would have been so tall, like so tall.
Jerk (:I was also built about like that back then, not today, but that's okay. So, but I was not good at point.
Bitch (:With your bun, what were you like seven foot tall?
Jerk (:Probably. Yeah, probably close. No, I was not good at point. I have weak ankles, apparently. And so I had to do like ankle exercises. Also, those things destroy your feet. Like you literally wrap your toes in like sheep, like whatever, lambswool, wrap your toes in it and gauze. And then you have to like stomp the toes of your feet in this resin, like all stompy. And then you get stand up on the top of your feet. Also in point.
You aren't up on the points the whole time. That's like a misnomer in like TV and film and stuff. If you actually go to a ballet, they aren't on the toe the whole time. That's part of what they do. That's usually when they do spins or specific poses. Anyways, oh, I digress. I'm mad about how pristine these shoes are. It bothered me from the start.
Bitch (:Yeah.
Bitch (:I think that was a good digression, but also their prestige has the curse and that's probably should have been your first sign of them. Like is the same that there's something wrong with these shoes. They're very pretty, but also most of, like I said, all of them were like super cute.
Jerk (:But there's something wrong with these.
Jerk (:Well, we get a pretty fun death scene for arena. I'm just going to go straight to it. As our janitor is mopping in the hallway, she can't see him. She can't stop dancing. She is spinning and can't stop on stuff. She is spinning and spinning and spinning. And they do a really good edit here, though, where it looks like she's following the movements of the mopping. And you're like, as a viewer, you're like, what the fuck?
Bitch (:Can't stop, won't stop.
Bitch (:I love this.
Yes, it's so great.
Well, I also kind of wonder, like, could he hear what was playing through the speakers? And so he was dancing with his mop and like maybe like in his head, like he wanted to be a dancer his whole life and he never got a shot. And so the closest thing he has is a mop like in this dance studio. And so he just like wants to imagine his dream and like there should be a movie like he comes out and he wins like the senior dance contest or something.
Jerk (:Is he mopping to the music?
Jerk (:I see the music. Oh my gosh.
Bitch (:Or his kid, like his kid has to break out and he's like, no, you can't have these dreams. I don't know. I just made step up 75. So we did anyways. So.
Jerk (:Yeah.
Jerk (:You did. You did. I'm impressed. So she dances and we see blood splatter and then we finally see what happens and her feet have broken off and she did. And it is quite a pretty epic death scene. Very apropos for around Halloweeny. It felt to me like, oh, I feel like this is somebody is like. Like haunted house scene.
Bitch (:Also, he just mopped that floor, that is very rude.
Jerk (:Oh, I thought he mopped about the hall. He hadn't mopped in there yet. They've been practicing, so it's fine.
Bitch (:Okay, well hopefully he hadn't gotten too like that, but the janitor is very upset and he does cross himself.
Jerk (:He does do this on the cross. But the ballet shoes are sitting there posed perfectly pristine. So, you know, something's up with the fucking shoes. You know, something's up with them. So we cut to our brothers and Dean is on the phone with Frank talking about Dick's activities, including an archaeological dig. And there's somewhere snowy.
Bitch (:Yeah, so no blood. See?
Bitch (:Hehehe
Bitch (:He's outside in a jacket that is clearly not like heavy enough for whatever weather they're at because there is a basically looking at like piles of snow
Jerk (:Yeah. And Frank talks about wanting to get that. He's going to go to, what is it? Tronso, is that how he said it? He said it real fast. He's going to Norway. Because there's zero Leviathan activity there. Noted. But he does point out that there's a brand new Biggersons that has now opened in Butte, Montana. Sam and Dean are in Oregon. And Dean's like, hey, I want to know more about the-
Bitch (:He's going to Norway. That's just, I just, I, he's going to Norway.
Jerk (:coordinates that Bobby left for us in Wisconsin. But Frank's got nothing, and they're both annoyed with each other, basically.
Bitch (:And then Frank, my good Lord, Frank. Yeah, Frank hangs up on him. And I just, I very identified with Frank. I love a good hang up on people. It feels good. I miss the fact that I can't slam.
Jerk (:I gave it to you. Hangs up on him.
Jerk (:Really? Well, in the meantime, Sam strolls up with like, with drinking a bunch of coffee, and Dean's like calls him out for his coffee consumption, and we find out now that Sam is not sleeping. Sam is drinking coffee to stay awake, because every time he closes his eyes now, Lucifer is yelling in his head, because in the last episode, he had been able to ignore Lucifer and then make him stop by pushing on his hand. But now that he acknowledged Lucifer, because he told him to shut up, now he can't do it anymore.
Bitch (:So I think this is stupid though. Like if you can't fall asleep because somebody is yapping at you, why are you drinking caffeine? Cause you're just gonna be stressed and like super, you're gonna feel worse. Like after a while, those two are gonna counteract each other and you're just gonna like wanna throw up. And then you're gonna be nauseated, nauseous. Yeah, then you're gonna be nauseous and.
Jerk (:I don't know. I mean, if you're just desperate to try to stay awake and not fall asleep, what else do you do? Other than math.
Bitch (:But he's he wants he says he wants to sleep. That's what I don't get. He says like the he likes to sleep and Lucifer won't shut up. So if he falls asleep.
Jerk (:Yeah, but well, he would like to sleep. But well, I think he would like to.
Jerk (:So he can't go to sleep is the thing. I think he's.
Bitch (:Yeah, he's saying he can't go to sleep. So why are you drinking coffee? It's stupid. Anyways, they're really dumb boys in this.
Jerk (:stay awake? I don't know that's how I read it. I don't know. I get it. They are. So Dean's trying to read, you know, kind of like, okay, crazy Sam, you know, he's not really there. Yeah, I know he's not, but the hand thing's not working. But by the way, there's this dancer that danced for fucking feet off. Let's go check it out.
Bitch (:Hehehe
Bitch (:I wrote, Sam has found an article about old Nofeet. And Dean thinks dancers are toe shoes full of crazy and he saw Black Swan twice. So they're going to Portland.
Jerk (:Yeah, I could.
Bitch (:And then, oh, Diana, tell us about that hot piece of steel.
Bitch (:You didn't get what the car was?
Jerk (:I didn't. I failed. Failed us.
Bitch (:you because you wear a red blazer. That's why.
Jerk (:I'm sorry. I was so focused on the fucking ballet shoes and then I was like, damn it, they're gonna change cars three times this episode, so fuck it, because they've been doing that to me. And then now I was, and I just didn't.
Bitch (:they were all good cars. I don't know. Maybe it's your homework afterwards to go back and find them and post them on Instagram. Okay, so they drive off and I'm pretty sure it was either a Firebird or a Trans Am. Was it a Firebird? No. Yeah, I think my first guess
Jerk (:So...
Jerk (:Okay, a firebird. It was either a firebird or an animal. It was a firebird, I thought it was, so yeah.
Jerk (:They are very similar, so it's reasonable. So, at the police station.
Bitch (:They are at the Portland Police Department. This is where my notes just say nope. Nope. He's in my mouth shut
Jerk (:Oh, well, this is all this is a while ago, so we're just gonna leave it at that. So they're discussing that there weren't signs of sulfur or anything else like that at the dance studio. So they get like super, super like cool guy dismissed by the cop at the counter until they flashed their FBI badges and then they get to go see crime scene photos in the evidence room. But before they make it. Yeah.
Bitch (:It
short.
Bitch (:So they have skit, they've indicated that they've interviewed all of the other dancers. So I'm interested that they didn't want to pursue that, like as, I think there was some comedy gold that probably was there, probably just because I'm wanting to see more ballet dancers. But I feel like they left that out and I was kind of sad.
Jerk (:get past.
Jerk (:Maybe the douchebag meter for Dean couldn't handle that conversation.
Bitch (:Perhaps, no, there's like, no, we can't do that. Too, too far. So while that happens, we do get a cop who looks very much like the cop that was in Everybody Loves Raymond, whatever that dude's name is. You know what I'm talking about? Like, and I feel like they're very similar. So he's getting the ballet shoes out of the evidence and.
Jerk (:That's too far, too far.
Jerk (:Oh, kind of. Yeah, I didn't realize that you're right. Yeah.
Bitch (:He's got a child, he was working in the evidence room because Portland PD apparently does not have childcare, which should kind of actually surprise going to Portland. But.
Jerk (:Well, I mean, also this was 12 years ago. So we've got, there should not be a child in the evidence locker. There's no, you cannot have, no kids in the evidence locker. No kids in the evidence locker. No, no, I meant about child care being offered by them. That's the part. But a child should not be hanging out in the evidence room. We got little Tracy, his daughter, and she really wants these fucking point shoes. Because you know why?
Bitch (:Yeah, there still should be a child in the evidence locker. Why is there a child in the evidence locker? This... I don't... I don't care what year this is. Yeah, I know. I know.
Jerk (:because she's a fucking little girl in their pretty pointe shoes. That's why she wants them. That's what's happening. All that too.
Bitch (:or cause they're cursed.
Jerk (:And he tells them that she can't touch them, but she's gonna go to the bathroom.
Bitch (:Ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba
Jerk (:And while she's in the bathroom, Sam and Dean get to finally see the crime scene photos and they agree that it's real fucking weird. Cause it is. And Tracy's in the bathroom and as she walks...
Bitch (:Someone had no feet. It's fucking weird.
Jerk (:That's fucking weird.
Bitch (:Also, like, can you die from no feet? Because I was like, it was, because how fast can you bleed out? Like, I don't know. So back to Tracy and in the shoes.
Jerk (:I don't know. I mean, I guess it depends how much you bleed out. I mean, but you shoot, think you'd have time to crawl.
Jerk (:in the bathroom. She walks in the bathroom and the shoes are in the middle of the bathroom waiting for her. And she's just like a happy little girl, like, fuck yeah, here I get the damn shoes. And we're all like, and I'm all like, oh, those are that's creepy as fuck. Now, I was like, that's creepy as fuck. I'm not putting the random shoes chase me to the bathroom. No. I mean, maybe, maybe I would. Maybe. So she goes to them, sits on the floor and they shrink to her shoe size, which is magic. That's the coolest trick ever.
Bitch (:Perfect.
Bitch (:or like any woman, you would put them on. You would put them on.
I would put them on. They're really pretty.
Bitch (:What is the most fucking amazing thing that has ever happened? Why the fuck has this not been invented yet? Why are my shoes still not fitting?
Jerk (:So in the meantime, Sam and Dean have gone to the evidence room and that cop dad's there. And he's like, Oh, I'm surprised the FBI is here. Here's the shoes. Oh, shit. My little girl took them. She must have took them. She loves ballet.
Bitch (:Oh shucks, my child has just, has her, she has just run off with state's evidence and it's just, it's not state's evidence, whatever. You know, dude, I mean, like, it's like no big deal on that kid, she's such a kidder.
Jerk (:Yeah, that's all.
No.
Jerk (:That's so silly. So Sam and Dean like haul ass to the women's restroom. And Tracy's on the floor admiring the shoes. And she looks super freak, they come in. And this is where the scene gets real like, bad look. If somebody walks in, this looks so bad. This looks so bad. Because we've got Sam runs up, she like the shoes lift her off the ground and start making her dance. Sam runs over, grabs her by the body while Dean's trying to take the shoes forcibly off of her feet. And she kicks him in the head.
Not once, but twice. But while he's resting with her feet, she's screaming I'm sorry, and Sam is holding her squirming body in the women's restroom.
Bitch (:Yeah, that's not a good look for anybody, but it's also quite comical because she is apologizing. So you can tell that, you know, she is not, she feels bad about what's happening. Dean's getting kicked in the face by a child. So that's also funny. And it just, it shot very well. And especially when you think about like those giant, like I know it's a fake bathroom, but can you imagine like those two giant men, like in a real women's restroom?
Jerk (:It is very funny.
Jerk (:doing this intentionally.
Jerk (:Mm-hmm.
It is.
Jerk (:Very crowded.
Bitch (:Yeah, very kind of, but it's just, it's, it's very, they're like, Oh, we definitely have a cursed object. And fortunately we also have a cursed object, which has a sticker on it.
Jerk (:Yes.
Jerk (:point shoes definitely cost more than $15.99.
Bitch (:Well, these were supposed to be used.
Jerk (:Used point shoes generally cost more than $15.99 that are in pristine condition.
Bitch (:But you also have to remember where it says that they're coming from. They're coming from this antique store and we'll learn maybe somebody didn't price them. We can go into a whole antiques road show about what's going on.
Jerk (:I know I'm just like, uh, call the fucking pawn stars. I'm just kidding. All right. So there we go. So they're gonna go right. Time to go to the shop. Yeah. And as they park, it's real weird. Dean looks in the back seat and the shoes are there. That's viewers, right? Okay. Yeah, the shoes are there, but they point out that the shoes had been in the trunk and Dean.
really, really wants to touch the shoes and dance to Oblivion.
Bitch (:And it's because he touched them before and he's getting the strong urge to Prince Siegfried himself into oblivion, which was the, one of the main characters in Swan Lake, which is AKA from Black Swan. So he watched it probably more than once if you remember who Prince Siegfried is. And yeah.
Jerk (:Guess what movie I've never seen.
Bitch (:Of course. Well, that's a modern one. You should see that one. It's it's very good. It's very it's very dark Yeah
Jerk (:Thanks for watching.
Jerk (:It was not intentional. I just it was not like intentionally missed it. I just didn't see it
Bitch (:Yeah, and that and Miss Mila Kunich or however you say her name. Yeah, damn it.
Jerk (:Mele- mele- mele-coonis.
Bitch (:But yeah, that's even so hot anyways. Okay, so where are we? Okay, so shoes, okay. And oh, this is where I start getting pissed off at them. Okay, so one, because of the shoes are in the back seat, I'm like, y'all, this is not your first rodeo with the cursed object. Like, how do you not have some sort of box that you could put it in, like you have seen from your father, from Bobby?
Jerk (:We're on the street.
Jerk (:Mm-hmm.
Bitch (:from all the places that you have seen cursed objects before. Why in trunk with that the guesser is no trunk, right? So, but, well, I guess how, this, this is an interesting question. Like how are they transporting weapons and shit? Like.
Jerk (:Yeah, they're working on the run with different cars.
They don't, it's not trunk. I don't think they have the arsenal that they normally do. I think they're limited.
Bitch (:Interesting. Okay, okay. Maybe I'll buy that. Okay.
Jerk (:I think they're limited. Well, on the streets here in our little town of Portland, downtown Portland, which is not downtown Portland from my understanding. Portland-ish.
Bitch (:the streets.
Bitch (:No, but this Portland, it looks, it does not look, it does not look for landy yet. It looks Portlandish.
Jerk (:No, I got it. So we've got a real estate agent and her assistant in their lovely red blazers saying goodbye to Mr. Marshall after discussing an offer on his hardware shop.
Bitch (:So, and since those of you who can't see this, Diana is sporting a lovely red blazer in honor of this episode.
Jerk (:Yeah, dress the part.
Bitch (:This also where it starts to remind me of a Hallmark movie and maybe it's just because my mom it's well it's snowy but it's just Hallmark season is like kicking into gear. I know it's already time they're already showing them. So my mom was watching some this week and my theory is maybe they had these like ready to go for something else they couldn't do like during the Rider Strike.
Jerk (:It's snowy.
Jerk (:it is. It's about to be time.
Jerk (:too much.
Bitch (:And these are like getting pushed in to like, or like these were like things that were sort of ready and are filling in the gaps now. I don't know. They're just, but they're on. But there is a very much a like the bad corporations coming into town is gonna close out the mom and pop businesses.
Jerk (:Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
Right? Maybe. Interesting.
Jerk (:buy up all the property. Yep. Yeah. That is, that is definitely the theme. Yeah. And this woman is pretty mean to her assistant, George, and she insults him and then makes him open her car door for her. Which is a great combination. She's kind of a bitch. If we only knew, if we only knew, uh,
Bitch (:Kind of.
Hehehe
Jerk (:So Sam and Dean are crossing the street. Sam is holding the shoes out in front of him. I can't tell you, you said like maybe it's a pencil. I don't know if it's a screwdriver, but he's holding the shoes on something where he's not touching them out in front of him.
Bitch (:Yep. And so at this point, I'm just really, I'm getting upset. Like I, I get, I will get further and further upset over this as the episode goes on, but at this point, I do want to point out that there is another option besides putting them in a box and that is exercising them. So as promised last week, this is part of our exorcism sequence, but if you're watching it on YouTube, it'll
Jerk (:No, that's true.
Bitch (:be three because the other it was too long. So I'm spilling it. So this will be the third part. So just make things confusing and fun. See if you're paying attention. So exorcisms the sequel. Yep. So again, appropriate for our season of times, but exorcisms like, do you really have a season? I think they're your round thing. Right. So I want to talk about, this is lore. Yeah. Officially. Not unaffiliate. It could also be unofficially.
Jerk (:There we go. Exorcisms, the sequel, Devil's Chat podcast.
Jerk (:Yeah. So this is Taun. This is Lore, officially.
Bitch (:I think there was like an official lore. So this, what we're gonna talk about is the infestation of an object instruction for priests. So that is the title of this and this comes from the St. Michael's, the St. Michael's Center that we were talking about last week. Although it's credited on their webpage to the Catholic Handbook of Deliverance Prayers by Sequoia.
Jerk (:Oh, there he is.
Bitch (:Sure, we'll say that's us. So, but that title for me does kind of indicate that this is instructions for how to infest an object and not how to exercise with. But this is really to uninfest, de-fest.
Jerk (:That's how it sounds to uninfest it.
Jerk (:Too fast?
Bitch (:So what is an infested object? I think we have to clarify that first, right? So included among infested objects are amulets, talismans, good luck charms, new age stones and crystals, wands, objects used in hexing and cursing, and idolatrous statues and objects. So to me, the
Jerk (:Oh
Bitch (:you say infested i think a demon's in there right and it's just like oh i'm living in these cashews they want to do whatever you know but i guess there really wasn't like a demon in there was just like a thing i don't know like imagine
Jerk (:Yeah.
Jerk (:Yeah.
Jerk (:And intention? I don't know.
Bitch (:intention but anyhow this is basically saying though anything like anything like
Jerk (:There wasn't like a personified little demon going like, let's dance bitch, like in the show.
Bitch (:Yeah, like they're not like in the new age crystal that you're putting up your vagina, right? Like, I don't think there's a little demon there. Yeah. But, but, okay. So I forget what those are called, but that is something that would be considered an infested object. So, so, uh, to the. Yep.
Jerk (:I almost lost my wine.
Jerk (:noted.
Put some demon crystals up your twat. Got it.
Bitch (:So all crystals up your twat are demonic or at least infested. So they must be sprinkled with holy water while a prayer of deliverance is made over them. If they can be burned, burn them. So obviously you can't burn the twat crystal, crystal twat, every which way we could say that. But I mean you can't burn it. Like I think they want you to like burn it, not just like set it on fire. Like you know burn it and get rid of it.
Jerk (:Why not? I mean, you can like cleanse it with fire.
Jerk (:Burn it. Oh. Not like put it in a flame. You want it to actually like to burn the object. Got it. OK. I mean, that's a good clarification.
Bitch (:He wanted to be consumed by something. And yes, I'll tell you why. So while it's burning, you say, our father over them. And then afterwards, the ashes are thrown in outdoor running water, like in a river. I'm not sure if like a hose could work, but also.
Jerk (:Okay.
Bitch (:So then like the next step says that if they are if they cannot be burned after the deliverance prayer, they are thrown in outdoor running water. Make sure they are thrown in an area where they would not be found. Because otherwise, like you're just saying, like, I have this curse, I'm just gonna fuck it. I'm like littering one like you're just encouraging littering like
Jerk (:You're just passing it on to someone else. Bucket yours now.
Jerk (:That's weird.
Bitch (:You know, like you want people to set shit on fire and some of these things like probably you should not be burning and inhaling like But it also stopped
Jerk (:Do we know what kind of, do we know what kind of like, in inhalable things are coming from burning demons? I don't know.
Bitch (:I don't know, but also just burning the physical object itself. Like, this shit's probably made with weird toxins that are just going to give you cancer. So, then it also says, do not forget to wash one's hands with holy water after handling such objects. So, we have not seen Sam and Dean wash their hands with holy water once. I will say that. They never use that as a method for cleansing their hands, but maybe they should.
Jerk (:Oh, yeah.
Jerk (:Hmm, never. Weird.
Bitch (:I mean, maybe if I had, I mean, I get they're running unlimited things, but that's something like they've learned to do on like the fly, right? So I would just say before I like rubbed some magical like point shoes, like maybe throw some holy water in my hands. Like you're probably carrying a bottle of sanitizer, just carrying a bottle of holy water. You're like, so all right. Number six.
Jerk (:Yeah.
Bitch (:How does one deal with infested objects? Okay, this one I have looked, like I could not figure out what they meant. Like I had a discussion with my chat, GPTdemon. Like we could not figure out what this meant. And I don't know if it's just a typo. I'm assuming it's a typo. So it says, how does one deal with infested objects of nature such as a tree of earther where elementals have been seen to dwell?
I have no fucking idea what a tree of earth there is. Neither does the internet.
Jerk (:Okay then.
Jerk (:Huh. Does this mean a tree? Because it's from the Earth?
Bitch (:or AI.
Bitch (:I think we're maybe like...
Like maybe a tree where like a like a NIAID or something was in it, like an elemental, like a fairy. Because I think when you say elemental, I kind of I think of like a fairy, right? Or like those type of things that live in, you know, nature religions. I don't know. But apparently if you have something that have the has that aspect of it. So it's an object of nature.
like a tree of something. I'm assuming I don't know what that hypo was for. Something got auto corrected. It's like a mad lib. Like a mad lib for weird exorcisms. So it has many steps to follow. So you call upon the protection of the Blessed Virgin Mary for oneself, one's loved ones, and also one's possessions. Call upon the intercession and assistance of all the saints
Jerk (:Right.
Jerk (:Huh. There you go.
Bitch (:With a crucifix in one hand, pray a deliverance prayer over the object, sprinkle holy water and exercise salt on the object and the surrounding area. The salt must be exercised. You can't use just like your table pink Himalayan salt. You gotta make sure that's exercised. If appropriate, you may afterwards place a sacramental on the object such as a Saint Benedict's medal or a crucifix. Blessed, of course.
I don't know what that has to do with the nature thing though, right? I feel like somebody was copying and pasting for another part of their crisis management plan for this cursed object.
Jerk (:Thank you.
Bitch (:Cause I don't feel like that goes with number six or whatever that was. Because I mean, unless they're saying, I guess like you can. No, it's you don't burn the tree. You just like basically put holy water and salt on it.
Jerk (:Think you're onto something.
Jerk (:You'd be real sad if you had to burn the tree again.
Bitch (:I mean, you could, or like, just cut down the tree and threw it in the river.
Jerk (:But I do think it's interesting that the, you know, we still have our constants of holy water and salt. Always come back.
Bitch (:We keep coming back to it. I wonder like, oh, I wonder though, if that is more of a recent thing, right? As these things starting to get getting written down. It'd be interesting to kind of chase the origin of where the Catholic handbook of deliverance prayers came from. I didn't go down that rabbit hole. I just stopped with this rabbit hole.
Jerk (:Maybe.
Jerk (:Hmm.
Jerk (:No, understood. That's a reasonable rabbit hole to stop at. I feel like there's people that spend entire scholarly lives studying the other part, but go ahead.
Bitch (:Yep. So that is something.
Bitch (:I'm sure I will go back to it at some point like this show Well, I've always the concept of the exorcism will be we've got Seven how many more seasons? Don't make me do math eight leads eight That's something like seven and a half. So anyways Yeah, so that is the conclusion of exercise exorcisms part two or part two
Jerk (:Oh.
Jerk (:That's eight, seven.
Jerk (:Yeah. See, after we finish this one, then it's yeah.
Jerk (:Right there.
Bitch (:depending on how you're consuming this.
Jerk (:So don't litter, don't burn down trees. No, you got burning down shit.
Bitch (:No, litter. It says litter. You're supposed to litter and burn shit. That's what the church said.
Jerk (:See if you can get by with just some holy water and salt and some prayers.
Bitch (:I'm just like, look, if that's like your last, like why, why don't you just do that?
Jerk (:And don't put and don't put a demon crystal in your don't put a demon crystal in your twat.
Bitch (:Well, or if you do put a demon's crystal in your twat, like don't try and burn that. Like I don't think you can. I don't, I think you have to have a really like strong fire. But also if holy water and salt works, like why are you going to like, why do you have to find a river? The holy water and salt seems like that's pretty easy.
Jerk (:Hmm? I don't know.
Bitch (:Anyways, if I ran the exorcisms, this is what happens when you don't let women be in charge. If you had let women be in charge of shit, this would be so much work.
Jerk (:Liz's exorcism guide. We can make this practical and simple. And efficient anyways, and clearly and clearly communicate the steps. There we go.
Bitch (:Okay, so we're going back to...
Bitch (:with a flow chart probably. So they're going back to the antique store and the man working here has his, like mom had whatever these things were in the coolest box ever. And I want the furniture line made from this box.
Jerk (:Well, yeah, he's like, yeah, our business is going out of sale because my, you know, there's a bunch of shit my mom had in the back and I'm selling it. And they just really cool carved wooden boxes that this shit was in. But it was all in her safe and OBT dub. My mom died last week.
Bitch (:which is Sam was being a dick to him. Well, he was being very, but.
Jerk (:He was. He's like, how dare you sell this shit? He's like, I don't know, my mom had this shit. He's like, why would she have done it? I don't know, she fucking died last week. Like, what the fuck do you want from me, dude? It's kind of the tape.
Bitch (:Yeah, and so I get it, Lay's like, oh, all right. But I feel like Scott is shady, and I don't know if I would trust what he said.
Jerk (:I like Scott. Poor Scott Freeman. I thought he was I liked him. I thought he seemed nice. So and he's just he's just he's just trying to get rid of all the stuff that she collected. And Dean has two more of these wooden boxes with symbols on them that are empty. So they ask what was in them. And before.
Bitch (:Sure, I don't trust anyone.
Bitch (:say yell and like berate him about what is happening. And I love these boxes so much of the best curse boxes.
Jerk (:Yeah, well, and before and before we find out that before Scott came and answer and tell Sam and Dean what was in them, we cut to a new scene in a kitchen where a woman is pulling a knife from her knife block. And as she is, she's got a meat grinder loaded up, man, they are teasing us as the audience so hard. We got knives. We got fuck a meat grinder. I was like, damn. And we've got these perfectly sliced vegetables.
Bitch (:Hehehehehehehehehehe
Jerk (:And we've got a woman perfectly continuing to perfectly slice vegetables and at
Bitch (:And then making me go, damn, I really, when's the last time I cut a vegetable? I need to cut more vegetables.
Jerk (:Really? I can't mention those a lot. And then we get a shot of some fancy old scissors sitting on a pile of magazines. They're continuing to tease us. And then a tea kettle whistles. Oh, that's weird. And it's a very pretty, very ornate tea kettle. It's like a cast iron kind of one that's like all decorated.
Bitch (:Yeah.
Bitch (:I wouldn't drink out of that. Yeah. I would be totally afraid to like put that on fire. That seems like a bad idea.
Jerk (:She walks over to it grabs the metal handle with her bare hand which starts steaming and tilts her head back and starts pouring the Hot water down her throat and face burning her significantly as it does
Bitch (:It was amazing. It was so it was so gross and awesome. It was amazing. So then we just cut from that back to the antique store. And start Scott is all there. This stuff is all covered in like a symbols and a safe. I didn't understand like why they just seemed like.
Jerk (:It was so good. The effects were excellent. It was well done. It was awful. Yeah.
Jerk (:But he does say, what kind of FBI guys are you? He does ask that, which is valid.
Bitch (:Hehehe
Jerk (:But he's like, I just thought she was into weird stuff. Huh.
Bitch (:What the fuck is wrong with you? At least I would... The Google was starting to exist now. I don't know. I would be like, something is going on. But whatever. I think I don't like it when you're a fucking idiot. So...
Jerk (:I don't know. I mean, like somebody coming in being like, oh, these shoes you sold in your secondhand store killed somebody. I think I'd be kind of like, the fuck? Who are you?
Bitch (:But also my mom had all this stuff that were in all these boxes with weird symbols on it in a safe with weird symbols on it. Like, having to see Raiders of the Lost Ark or like anything like any sort of pop culture, like any like anything that was like, oh my god, why are there symbols all over this? Like how what fucking moron argue that it doesn't make you go? Was my mom a satanist or something?
Jerk (:Ahhhh... Phew...
Jerk (:Wait a minute. Yeah, maybe. Yeah. Something. Well, Scott's like very confused when Dean tells him that the junk is killing people. So Sam's just like, I just need to know what you sold and the names and addresses of who you sold it to. So Sam and Dean pull up to a house. They the woman that they know has bought a tea kettle. And Sam's like, well, hey, you know.
Jerk (:anything could be turned in from a pencil could be turned into a weapon of mass destruction at this point. So they just stroll on into this lady's house. No knock, no break in, no yell, just walk on in her front door, which is apparently unlocked and
Bitch (:I don't know, knock one out, it's fine. So, but they walk in and they find the scene and I was like, oh, well, that's not good. And you know, so at least this time, like, they find poor tea kettle lady and Dean uses gloves, but you've got the fucking box, man. You've got the fucking box. Just put it, put it in the box.
Jerk (:Yeah, they do.
Mm hmm. But they have to and then they have to call in the death because they're the only ones that know this lady's dead now. So Sam has to call the police and be like, Oh, there's been an accident. Like, yeah, like, who the fuck are you? And he's like he gives the name Bruce Hornsby, who's a musician.
Bitch (:Yep, he sure does. I mean, and technically like they didn't have to call. They could have just let her turn to a pile of goo. But anyways, so after disappointing me with what they're doing, yeah.
Jerk (:Ew.
Jerk (:But here's my question. Hold on. I've got a question. So the police are going to show up and they're going to be like, this lady died from these weird burns on her neck, face and throat. Where did she get the burns? Because they're taking the tea kettle with them.
Bitch (:It's Portland.
Jerk (:I'm just saying I thought that was like, well, like they just took the weapon, the thing that she killed herself with, whether intentionally or not. But the thing she killed herself with is now gone. And so now they're going to know that somebody was there. And that's true.
Bitch (:Yeah, but they kind of they fuck up crime scenes everywhere they go. They also left their leg, their DNA and the fingerprints all over this. Like I am sure there is like some cold case like 2023 like Dateline about the serial killer Sam Dean one-shot service. All their DNA was discovered everywhere. So anyway, so they've got the box and this is where they determine the next things they have to go after.
Jerk (:That's true.
Jerk (:all over all these cases. Yeah. Well.
Jerk (:Yes. So they're going to split up. Sam is going to go seek out a gramophone. And of course, Dean is going to get a vintage gentleman's mag.
Bitch (:How does old porn kill you? First, good question, we all know, we all know. So first the gramophone, and we're going to a suburban home.
Jerk (:That's a good question.
Jerk (:Uh huh. And we've got a woman and she turns it on and she's admiring it while this kid is sitting there playing on his iPad and. He's like, whatever. Yeah. And so but she leaves goes putting away laundry. And while she's gone, like we realized the music is playing and there's some weird fucking voice behind this music. It is creepy of. So.
Bitch (:Cause he's like, I don't get this fucking gramophone. I'm here, I'm with you fucking kid.
Bitch (:I love this gramophone so much! I wish I had this gramophone. It's the cutest thing ever! It's like, hey Danny! Hey Danny! Come here! Oh I don't know why I thought his name was Danny, but whatever. So hey little boy! Come here! Come here! And then like comes and it whispers to him, apparently whispers, wouldn't it be fun to slash your mom with a butcher knife?
Jerk (:No, no ma'am. Timmy, Timmy.
Jerk (:Apparently it's not his mom. It's his nanny according to the according to the to the casting notes, but still yeah Super fucking crazy because his eye he go gets a knife and when she comes back downstairs to fold to sit down to read a magazine He sneaks up on her with a fucking knife. He's gonna stab this bitch in the neck from behind But guess what Sam arrives just in time. Yeah, she don't die and
Bitch (:Oh, well. Yeah.
Bitch (:Yep, and Sam also uses the gloves, you know, he's using the kitchen gloves, yes, the dishwashing gloves. But again, why? You've got the box. And this kid's fucking rude. And I'm just like, maybe after... Yeah, maybe just after like the rude kids from like last night and like... Y'all, like, Barra can use to do something about your rude ass kids in Halloween.
Jerk (:the kitchen gloves.
Jerk (:He's like, that's mine.
Bitch (:This apparently was not just a problem in my neighborhood, apparently was a problem everywhere. What the fuck? It's a happy holiday. Don't be rude. Don't be little dicks.
Jerk (:Aww.
Jerk (:Yeah. Well, luckily ours were mostly good here, but there we go. So Sam Sam's like, he tells me he's like, this is a good time for listening gratitude, but lucky for you, I'm too tired. Thanks to the ground.
Bitch (:He does. And Dean has gotten the porn just in time. And he finally has a box though. There's finally something he finally has just found. Thank God. It was just like, okay, like, I can calm down, calm the fuck down.
Jerk (:and be out of bugs.
Jerk (:They put the they put the cursed objects in the boxes.
Bitch (:where they belong. Like, oh, order has been restored. Order has been restored. And we go back and Sam does want to know like what just in time meant, nobody wants to know, but we know. We all know.
Jerk (:Hmm.
Bitch (:So we go back to the antique store.
Jerk (:And Dean's putting all the boxes in this back in the mom's safe because he's like, Nope, we're going to put all this in here. And Scott's kind of trying to talk to him. He's like, so wait, my mom, my mom wasn't, it wasn't just like a whack job. This shit's real. And Dean's like, yeah, yeah. And Scott feels kind of bad now. He's like, man, I really like, I'm kind of guilty. I really just like pushed her to sell this store. This real estate agent lady kept coming around. And then right after that, like right after mom finally agreed, mom had this accident and you know, it's, it was just,
Bitch (:See, and this is also what I think I fucking hate Scott cause his mom, I think his mom was awesome, right? She's got all these cursed objects that she has in boxes. She was probably out collecting them. Like she was some sort of like hunter or something like working like something like she collecting cursed objects and putting them safe and locking them away, right? So his mom was probably fucking awesome. He was just a snotty little brat kid being like, non, sell your junk. And she's actually protecting the world.
Jerk (:Everyone had the money the next day. It was really sad.
Bitch (:Fuck you, Scott.
Jerk (:Most of us wouldn't believe someone if they're like, no, I don't want to tell you about my cursed objects I'm collecting. Somebody tell me they're...
Bitch (:But they were clearly real! She was clearly real and he was a dick. I'm sorry, he was not nice to his mom.
Jerk (:I feel bad for Scott. Anyways, so and he but he does feel bad. He's very feels really guilty about how this all went down and he's expressing that. And Dean says and Dean's consoles him. It was a nice little scene, I thought. And he's like, you know, the guilt won't bring her back. You've just got to live the way that would make her proud. Oh, I thought that was sweet. And he says, just don't go near the fucking safe. We're going to get a you haul. Cool.
Bitch (:Ah, fuck Scott.
Bitch (:I don't think he does. I think he's full of shit.
Bitch (:Meh. Whatever.
Jerk (:So as this is happening.
Bitch (:you can tell you can't you can't trust Scott either Scott's like cool like you know he's gonna do something that fucks
Jerk (:He's not. So outside Dean's walking down the street and he starts realizing that he sees these signs for Joyce Bickleby realty everywhere. Every single storefront. She is building up every bit of real estate. He's just heard fricking, they had heard, they had heard them talking to, they saw them talking to Mr. Marshall on their way in. Now he's got Scott's story. And so now there's like, now it's bringing like a little bit of an alarm bell.
Bitch (:And even if...
Bitch (:And even the last name Bickleby is Homer.
Jerk (:kind of is.
Bitch (:It is. So I think it's also just her colorings, like maybe even the coloring in this episode, like it's just very reminiscent of that. I mean, it's just maybe it's the very over the top blazers is probably what's
Jerk (:It's like the super cliche, like no real estate agent wears this anymore. You know what I mean? Like that's just like the over the top, like that whole that like, because everybody's a fucking real estate agent now. No offense. I know a lot of lovely people that are real estate. It's just one of those things. So we cut back to Joyce, our real estate agent and Mr. Marshall, and they're in her office and she's explaining that like, look, the block's just not going to be the same anymore with your gone. But
You know, we just, you know, she's really rude to George. I mean, it's just basically she's doing a hard sell.
Bitch (:She's doing a hard sell and she's, but she's like, if I was like this dude, I'm like, you're belittling your employee in front of me and you think that's gonna make me wanna give you shit, lady? Fuck off. And so the speech she's giving is just backfiring.
Jerk (:And it totally backfires because her whole thing is like, Oh, she thinks he's agreed. He is going to sell. He's ready to sign. And she's like, yeah, it'd be so great. You can get on with your life. And that's when he realized the store is his life and that he doesn't want to get on with it. So she's like, no, can't sell. Sorry. So she's trying to change tactics, but it's too fucking late. And then she gets real dark because then says he's going to get up and leave.
She shakes his hand and wishes him luck with the rest of his life. What little there is left. Okay. This got weird. And as they're shaking hands, she squeezes it and then she twins and turns into him because she's a fucking Leviathan.
Jerk (:And then she snaps his neck and signs the papers and sells his property to herself. I don't know, because you're him. So I don't know. That's very questionable.
Bitch (:Is this forgery? Is that legally binding?
Jerk (:Very weird. And.
Bitch (:It is like this is this is this would be a case for a bill of course. So. Oh, oh yes. Yes, please. Switch or, um, oh, family feud, family feud. Uh.
Jerk (:It would be. I wanna see Judge Judy take this case on.
Jerk (:Oh, that's Steve Harvey on there, right?
Bitch (:Yes, Steve Harvey, he's also a judge. The judge, like Steve Jobs, he jumped Steve Harvey into this. But George has finally come, like he's standing up a little bit, and he was like, do you, Joyce, did you go too far?
Jerk (:Yeah. He's like, look, you know, we've already killed a few people and you're going to call attention to this. You know, Mr. Roman don't like that shit. And but she is not happy. She's like, now you need to take this body to this dude's house and make sure it looks like his cigar, like burned him up. Boom. Go. She is not hearing George's comments.
Bitch (:No, no. And then she threatens him by telling him that she's had five assistants.
Jerk (:Not very complimentary to her. And so it's and she's like.
Bitch (:Uh-huh. I've so worked for Joyce. Like, yeah, I have very much PTSD with, with Joyce. She's bitchy cause her coffee's tepid and then she wants a, okay. So what do you suss out this, this coffee order is grande, nonfat, whip, white mocha, one pup, sugar-free, double shot espresso. Is that even a coffee drink?
Jerk (:Yeah. I bet you go order that right now.
Bitch (:Okay, so it's a mocha, right? With...
Jerk (:mocha double espresso so it's kind of it's a mocha so why chocolate mocha with an extra shot and but sugar free because that's how they construct it is i can't i don't drink coffee drinks like that so joyce is awful um and so but she's got her specific barista on main and so she wants george to go do that
Bitch (:So why didn't you just say that?
Bitch (:Uh, that's stupid. Fuck you, Joyce.
Jerk (:In the meantime, we've got Sam driving by himself, which is a terrible idea. Oh yeah, this is the guy that's not sleeping out to drive at night alone. Anyways.
Bitch (:Yeah, but I feel this pain because I think it's a very relatable scene. Like we've all, like, as much as we shouldn't do it, like we've...
Jerk (:Ugh.
Bitch (:so tired and all you want to do is like stay up.
Jerk (:I can't do it anymore. I cannot anymore. Ugh. So we've got, and there's a, yeah, as I say, there's a song called Start Me Laughing playing by a band called Dead Confederate, and his phone rings, and Dean's like, hey, you know, by the way, we can't leave town yet. He's sitting at a diner doing research, and he's like, look, yeah, there's these super sus deaths.
Bitch (:I have sleep apnea and it happens to me all the time. Anyway, so we're striking that for the record.
Jerk (:tied to the real estate deals. So we've got to check it out. And Sam has struggle busting it hard along the sleep deprivation. And that's about it on this convo. But.
Bitch (:And there's a weird goof in here though, because Dean says he thinks that it's weird that there's this new realty company that's come in and bought up a bunch of real estate. And then on the webpage that he's looking at where it has Joyce's bio, Joyce's bio says with over 20 years experience in the real estate market, I wanted Portland's top realtors. I mean, which to be fair, could be a Leviathan thing they lied about. But he does say like they're brand new on the scene and her says that it's 20 years. So then.
Jerk (:Yeah, they're new, but also not.
Bitch (:Man, through is a good...
Jerk (:Well, either way, so we've got Sam sleepy driving and Dean sitting there doing research and he decides to call Frank again and wants him to, because he's got to figure out how to get into figure out who this, what this real estate company is all about and get into their website. Geo, geothrive.
Bitch (:My boy Frank!
Bitch (:Yeah.
And he wants to know if Frank can get in there and Frank asks the dogs can play poker and they can.
Jerk (:Well, while that's all going on, Sam is going to fall asleep driving. He does much of swerving. He almost gets in a wreck and it's real scary.
and
Bitch (:It's really and he wakes up and he swerves and you think something's gonna happen, but it does we just got to a barista
Jerk (:Yeah, now we just catch a barista. We got George talking at Mojo Java. And this barista puts in an extra pump. And George is not happy about that because she wanted one pump. And now he's got two pumps. And the guy's like, oh, the pumps free. And he's like, I didn't want the fucking pump. And the barista is really shitty. And it's just a really ugly exchange. He says, eat me.
Bitch (:It's also not what he ordered, you fucking dick. Like...
Jerk (:And George says, don't tempt me. So now we know for sure that George is also Leviathan. We already knew he was into it, knew what was going on with Dick Roman, but that's our proof, I guess.
Bitch (:Yeah. And I think we're, I'm not sure about you. We'll see. I have way more sympathy for fucking George than I do for Scott. Like I love George. Oh yeah. Because I have been in George's shoes. Like I have worked for Joyce. I've been trampled on by her. And I probably have this exact same situation happening at a coffee shop and like had somebody shit on me than being like, Oh my God, I'm going to have this grown ass woman yelling at me. And so I feel for you.
Jerk (:Really?
Bitch (:And I love this kind of don't tempt me.
Jerk (:Well, in the background, he hears Sam order his triple red eye, and he recognizes Sam's voice. So that's a that's something. And so we've got. George following Sam now follows him to the antique shop, calls Joyce, and he's like, look, I found Winchester's there in Portland. I'm going to eat this motherfucker. And she's like, no, I get to eat them. You got to come here.
Bitch (:And she's like, get back to the office chain of commands. I eat him. And just, oh, what a comment, right? And then she takes her coffee and she's just like, ah, two pups.
Jerk (:It's she knows exactly when you drink. I'm I was going to knock. I don't care. Drink, drink all your fancy coffee is all you want. I drink my coffee black. Typically I drink like I'll get a fancy drink occasionally, but like I'm not going to be able to do this had two pumps versus one pump. Like, come on. It's not barely. It's barely coffee now. Come on.
Bitch (:You still know.
Bitch (:I am. Well, that's also just why it's irritating. It's all just very irritating. But then we go from her being irritating to Dean, I fucking.
Jerk (:Yeah. And Frank calls him though. And he tells him that GeoThrive is all dick. Cause it's all dick.
Bitch (:Yeah. Well, what he tells him is he's figured out why he has hit that firewall. And I'm like, because it was the public facing website that had some minor access controls. That's not a strange firewall. That's just, this is not corporate league. Nothing like, yeah, they, you just can't look at their corporate shit. You really should not suppose to. So, but then Dean says that to Frank.
Jerk (:That's correct. That's pretty normal. That's very normal.
Bitch (:that my silence is your cue and he smiles at him because he think he's in love and this is totally the new Destiel which I don't know that should be like freeing or dank or drank. I'm not sure what is like the appropriate shipping name.
Jerk (:There is not a shipping here. It's just them. They're just teasing each other because they both know this is like a Bobby relationship. That's not at that kind of thing. Gross. No, don't make it weird.
Bitch (:Look at his face, like he is just in love with them. But they're teasing because they are in love. It's not a Bobby relationship. They are in love. I'm starting to think that Supernatural is all about the love life of Dean Winchester.
Bitch (:So, I don't know, just the smile on his face as he says that back to him is just so beautiful.
Jerk (:He's saying it because Frank had said it to him before. It's just very funny. That's all. This is trying about fair play.
Bitch (:It is very touching and it said, I love you. He said, I love you with his eyes. I saw it. I saw it, it was there.
Jerk (:He said, I love pie and I'm going to be snarky. That's what he said. Oh, ridiculous. So Dean and Dean and Frank discuss and they're like, Frank's like, you need to get the fuck out. And that's about it. So as that call ends, Sam arrives, Sam tells Dean tells Sam, B2W, Leviathans, also nesting dolls of Dick.
Bitch (:Anyways...
Jerk (:You know, so he's like, look, well, we but really, Sam, you need to fucking crash. But apparently, Sam has Lucifer singing Stairway to Heaven to him for the 50th time in a row.
Bitch (:Fuck you. Like one time's too much for that song. And 50 times in a row, oh my God. I also love that really overall the whole theme of this though is that it's corporate and smelly and Leviathan. And so anytime Roch is like, we know that it's super corporate and that's gonna be a problem, I'm down with this. So.
Jerk (:Well, Sam's phone rings and it's Scott, their friend Scott. And he's asking for help because he's saying that he looked in one of mom's old mirrors. Now he wants to rip his face off. And they're like, of course he did something with his mom's shit. They had totally judged Scott. Scott didn't do anything except for get trapped into making a trap for them by Joyce. Well, kind of.
Bitch (:Well right now Scott's being a little bitch. He's being a little bitch for Joys and it's a trap. So and then she pulls off her scarf and he puts it in his mouth and he squirts.
Jerk (:That's kind of gross. So anyway. Yeah, so she's shows a scarf in his mouth. And while they wait for Sam and Dean and Joyce, George has to tie Scott up with duct tape and they're like, look, all number one, Scott can't talk, but we also can't make it make the papers. So Joyce like, yeah, George, you'll just have to turn into Scott for the next 30 years. Sorry. But then what happens to who? But then what happens to George was?
Bitch (:I just hate those scarves too.
Bitch (:That's fucked up.
Jerk (:because George was somebody too. But one of them was just weird.
Bitch (:George just disappears. But no, he was just, he was just a real estate agent. So like, as long as George was just like a loner like real estate agent dude, because George was somebody before, right? So he, that body was like, I don't know, it's just an endless cycle. We don't know. So they're constantly covering their tracks. But then we have Sam and Dean pulling up in a truck with a U-Haul.
Jerk (:That's what I'm saying.
Jerk (:Yeah. And she, and of course, you know, Joyce and George are waiting for them. And she introduces themselves as the people who will be eating them. And she goes full Leviathan face because she's going to eat Dean. And George is going to go after Sam. And there's a big fight, but in the middle of our fight, George starts giving Sam hot tips. Like, Hey, that bucket right there is the stuff you use to burn us. Ta-da. Hey, over there is a sword. Go get it. And it like, George kind of stops fighting Sam.
And Sam gets to kill Joyce right as she's fighting really hard against Dean. Huh? That's weird.
Bitch (:Well, then we got to Dean putting Joyce's head in a bag in the safe, which I think is a very smart idea. And it's like, we're just going to make use of this space that we have now. And like, God damn it. Is this safe also magical? Like how much shit can it hold? Cause it looks like it's hold like a bunch of boxes and yeah, I'd like, I'd like the safe. So Scott's whining that he can't uproot his life. And I'm like, dude, you just got a big fucking check from selling your mom's fucking store.
Jerk (:A lot of space. Oh, pretty big safe.
Jerk (:Yeah. And they're like, no, you need to run, just fucking go. And he's like, OK, he finally leaves. And but Sam and Dean really need to know why George helped them. And he's like, and he's just straight upset because I'm dying to know what that bitch tastes like. This fool hated George or George hated Joyce so fucking much that he helped the enemy of the Leviathan, who they are all out to get.
just to take down Joyce.
Bitch (:also to eat her, right? And I think you're underestimating how much the Leviathans like to eat each other or themselves, right? Because when you have the whole, they're just very much an eating each other culture.
Jerk (:Well, I'm the same.
Jerk (:I guess.
Yeah, I mean, we do get a few bibbing references in this episode, too.
Bitch (:Right. And so what do you think happened to her other assistants? She ate them. So they're just like, it's part of their diet and their culture just to eat each other. So it makes perfect sense. That's what he wanted to do.
Jerk (:Oh, she ate them. I know, it's just weird.
Jerk (:I guess.
Bitch (:And I would say haven't you ever wanted to eat your boss, but that's a weird just gonna stop.
Jerk (:now.
Bitch (:Anyway, so... but he makes a point that at least, you know, she will stay dead, which is interesting, right? So this is, you know, I think the only bona fide method we know to kill a Leviathan, right? Because even the head sepp... to have them eat, I think seppu, right? They haven't said anything else.
Jerk (:So.
Jerk (:to eat it to have it to have it eaten by another Leviathan. And yeah, I guess. So Sam asks him straight out, are you does that mean you're on our side? And he says, no, he's not. So we have clarity there. He just really fucking hates Joyce. Just reasonable. He just doesn't want to clean up her clean up her messes or get eaten by her. So he's going to eat her instead. That's his hot take. So he thinks he thanks Sam and Dean.
Bitch (:Yep. He's very gleeful. He's gleeful.
Jerk (:And he also says, you're welcome to Sam and Dean and winks at him. He's like, Hey guys, it's a win day. We get this. And, uh, he's like, look, I, I don't even know what's good. They're like, Dean's like, no, this isn't going to go that way. I need you to tell me what the fuck Dick Roman's doing. And he's like, I don't know what's happening in fucking Wisconsin. So, but Sam has a sword to his throat. So that kind of changes his perspective.
And he just basically says, look, killing people is not part of our agenda. Joyce just got impatient. It's not how we're supposed to do things. We are everywhere. And it's more bigger and ambitious than this little fucking project. And what is this little fucking project? Oh, we're going to make a research center for disease to cure cancer.
Bitch (:What? And so now this throws everybody off because we're like, what, you're fucking evil. Why are you curing cancer?
Jerk (:Why are you you're not here to kill people? It's just a collateral damage situation and Joyce is a bitch situation. You're actually trying to buy up all this real estate to make a research center cure cancer. But also why? Like couldn't you build it in the fucking empty lot behind this instead of buying up all these people's businesses? It's nonsense. It doesn't make real estate sense. It's weird.
Bitch (:Well, none of this makes any sense. But basically the bottom line is that Leviathans are taking over, they're buying everything and they want to cure cancer because they're here to help. Amora kind of winking. We're just here to help.
Jerk (:Yes.
Jerk (:Here to help with the quotation marks.
Bitch (:It is very much it reminds me of I should go back. I love watching the old tree house of horrors, not like the I just haven't caught up on the new ones. I made myself I did watch like all of them like a few years ago. I sat down and watched all of them. But one of the cronies ones where they have the book of basically is like Soylent Green, but it's with the aliens.
Jerk (:Hmm.
Bitch (:And part of it is like, you know, how to feed humans. And they keep thinking like they're gonna eat them and then they're gonna feed them. And it goes back and forth and trying to figure out like, are we here to help or are we here to eat you? Like, right. And this is what I feel like we're at.
Jerk (:Yeah, it's very confusing.
Bitch (:It is. It's super confusing. And so they leave.
Jerk (:So the next day, Samadine load up the trailer. No, they definitely killed George. I thought so.
Bitch (:So they just let George go, right? Did they?
Jerk (:I thought they killed him.
Bitch (:They didn't show them killing. They just like went from, why wouldn't they, why would they give you that impression and then not, I don't know.
Jerk (:I got the impression.
Bitch (:I think they would have said something.
Jerk (:Dean's attitude gave me the impression. I feel like he'd be more torn the next day if they hadn't killed him.
Bitch (:I don't think they killed him. Anyways.
Bitch (:Because they would have had a discussion of what they did to separate his head and his body.
Jerk (:I guess. Well, they had that sword, I don't know.
Bitch (:I think something would have happened. Like they would have, I don't know. But.
Jerk (:I think but they but they but they've had this whole thing where they definitely don't let monsters live now. I mean, that goes back to like what's happened these last few episodes with the Amazon and Amy and all that stuff. You can't let them live.
Bitch (:I don't know, but I swear, I don't think they killed him. I think they would have showed him.
Jerk (:Hmm.
Bitch (:It's just really like, it's just not what happens is not referenced at all. And that's just, you know.
Jerk (:Nope. And then Deans makes a comment about how monsters cure cancer. It makes them nervous. It makes both of them very nervous. So he's like, look, Sam needs to fucking sleep on our way to Frank's place. So let's find the soft rock station. And then all of a sudden they get in the car and Bad Moon Rising by CCR is playing. And I don't think that that's necessarily soft rock. It's very weird. But the song is consistently playing from daytime through nighttime. And but the song doesn't end or repeat.
very weird and they get to Frank's Winnebago.
Bitch (:Hopefully it was not bad moon rising on repeat over and over again We have they haven't played the song since season one. So this is the first time you know, it's been brought back but it's a good song to have it but then No
Jerk (:Right?
Jerk (:That's a good song.
Frank Frank's not answering the door and this is not good. And they all for him not to shoot. So they're going to go in. And as soon as we go in, you see a little bit of bloody glass on the ground and you know, it's not good. All we know, though, is there's blood splatter, his shit's all smashed and fruited about.
Bitch (:Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Bitch (:Friend!
Bitch (:Frank's equipment! No! All of that gear! That was so much gear!
Jerk (:But we don't see Frank. But we don't see Frank, we just see some blood. Kind of a lot of blood. You don't know that he's dead, we didn't see a body. We didn't see a body.
Bitch (:Can I go steal all of his gear now that he said he won't need it anymore? Like I think he would want it to go. I don't know. There's a bunch of blood. There's a bunch of blood and I'm assuming Frank, see at least like, but there's no answers in this, right? We don't know what happened at George. We don't want having a Frank. We don't know what happened to Frank and Dean and free or drank.
Jerk (:Drank. Ah, that is not a ship name.
Bitch (:So they just kind of they leave us in this like shitty place, right? So again, like this is I think why people don't like season 7. So well, I'm gonna pause Yeah, I'm gonna pause the unanswered questions and to say ask our real estate lady in her red blazer Is there anything on your sign for sale in the casting couch?
Jerk (:Yes.
Jerk (:unanswered questions.
Jerk (:I'd be happy to share some information about our wonderful casting couch with you this week. So. So we've got and honestly, candidly, a lot of our actors this week, as enjoyable as it was and as great as they all were, are not necessarily actors with a huge resume. Most of them, a lot of them were. But so I'll kick off with our friend George. I was played by Brian Cooper.
Bitch (:Were they all in Hallmark movies?
Jerk (:He actually left, it says in his bio, he left acting in 2013 to pursue supporting at-risk youth in LA. So.
Bitch (:I already loved you George. See I could sit maybe I just sensed his good heart coming through
Jerk (:There you go. And he was also Roy in Buffy. So he's been multiple episodes of Buffy. He was Cliff in Sabrina the Teenage Witch, the old, the, Clarissa one, Mousetone Heart, yeah. And then he was a, he had a small bit part in Legally Blonde 2. So if I wanted to make you like him more, you're welcome.
Bitch (:the Melissa Joan part.
Jerk (:Joyce was played by Mary-Page Keller. She's been in episodes of things going back to Ellen, the sitcom, not the talk show, NCIS, Mad Men, and Grim. She was in multiple episodes of Sybil, Nip Tuck, 24, Pretty Little Liars, and Bosch. And she was a regular character named Sally on the show Another World. When I say regular, I mean 38 episodes regular. And...
Bitch (:Was that Jensen's? Was Jensen Days of Our Lives or was it Another World?
Jerk (:No.
Bitch (:Damn it! What was his... You know, I'll check.
Jerk (:I'm terrible at soap. All the soap operas run together for me, I'm sorry. And then she was an actress, there was a movie called The Negotiator, which was pretty big. She was Lisa in that in 1998. Our barista was played by David Leitch, who was also Mordecai in Scary Movie 4. Mr. Marshall was played by Roger Barton, who's had a very long career over the, you know, a lot of...
Bitch (:Hehehehe
Jerk (:small roles over the years, but a couple of notable things I'd point out. He's been a couple of episodes of TNT, which was the Mr. T show and in the 90s version of the show Kung Fu. He was also Mr. Bumstein in Detroit Rock City. And then Timmy's nanny is what they call her is Allison Grant. She's been in episodes of Bates Motel, Wayward Pines, I Zombie and more. Our tea kettle victim is.
in Hellraiser, Hellseeker in: Bitch (:That's so cool. She was a Cenobite, that's amazing.
Jerk (:She was a secretary in the 2003 Wrinkle in Time movie. She had a small part in the movie Miracle. She was Sylvia in the series Siren, pretty recently, the sci-fi series. And she's been in multiple episodes of Shmigadoon, which is an current Apple series.
Bitch (:good for her. And for those of you who I know are screaming at the radio or whatever the fuck you listen to this on, Jensen was in Decent for All Lives, not Another World. But it, I, again, like, I don't know, like, they, I, I can get through them. But anyways, that was, those are great.
Jerk (:I thought I didn't think it was something in the world, but I was like...
Jerk (:They run together, it's fun.
Jerk (:There you go.
Bitch (:So what did you think? I know what my feelings are, but what were...
Jerk (:So it was a fun episode overall. I mean, it was very much, I think it was fun. I appreciate that they're carrying the, it was fun and annoying at the same time. Does that make sense?
Bitch (:Those are what I feel like the Leviathan are as a big bad. I feel like they are fun and annoying.
Jerk (:Well, and then the cursed objects were fun. It made for a fun storyline. Not like, oh, it was fun watching people die away, but like it was, it added some flair, I don't know.
Bitch (:They were.
Bitch (:It was a fun storyline. And I think you could also really feel there was a lot of effort put in. I read in some of the back history of this that Jenny Klein trying to figure out like what the cursed objects were going to be and, you know, some things that got mixed and some things that didn't work. One thing that I forgot to bring up was that there was pitched that
Jerk (:Right.
Bitch (:Jensen did actually get those shoes on and had an entire dance scene to it. But it was, I believe denied by the network and Jensen that happened. But I built that. I think that would have been fun. I would have liked to have seen that. Like it was comedy gold that we missed out on.
Jerk (:That's funny. Yeah, it's very hard.
be challenging just to do for funsies.
Bitch (:Well, you can yeah, but you could do for fun things like where you wouldn't actually have to do it, right? You could fake part of it and then and then you would like cut in like real feats
Jerk (:Just pop a button and we'll be done, yeah.
Bitch (:I don't know. But yeah, it's, I think fun but annoying is a pretty is a good explanation of this episode. It wasn't too heavy.
Next week is heavier but exciting.
Jerk (:Well, we've left off pretty sad with concerned about Frank. So we're going to make some assumptions there. We're also deep back into Lucifer and Leviathan. So these are two those are two heavy things, and they've been easing back into those for the last couple of weeks. I'm not shocked by this. Does that make sense without spoilering?
Bitch (:No, and this season is very much a... Yeah, it's like when I'm at the gym and I have to pick my things in the treadmill. And, you know, I had to go up and down on the hills, my intervals. This is an interval season.
Jerk (:build up and down.
Jerk (:We're doing our intervals, doing our hills.
noted. I did my HIIT training this morning. Thanks. I did my intervals. All right. That's what I got. Yeah. Cheers, bitch.
Bitch (:All right, with that, I think we're good. All right, cheers, Jerk.
