Shownotes
Ready to move past Thanksgiving and embrace true gratitude every day? Discover how a thankful lifestyle can heal relationships, foster forgiveness, and bring new blessings into your life. Join us as we explore Mary and Martha's story to identify five obstacles to lasting gratitude and learn how to overcome bitterness through forgiveness.
Scriptures Referenced
Luke 10:38-42; Ephesians 4:29-32; Philippians 2:3-4; Colossians 3:12-14; James 4:6
Key Insights
- We will invest in things we really want, no matter the cost.
- Gratitude is the overflow of a selfless life posture.
- Selfishness keeps score. Gratitude loses count.
- Bitterness turns memories into weapons and rewrites a good story around the worst moment.
- True forgiveness draws circles, not lines.
- Gratitude should be a lifestyle.
https://springhouse.captivate.fm/episode/the-pathway-to-gratitude
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Gathering Times
- Sundays, 9:00 AM
- Sundays, 11:00 AM
- Thursdays, 6:00 PM
Contact Info
Springhouse Church
14119 Old Nashville Highway
Smyrna TN 37167
CCLI License 2070006
Transcripts
Good morning, Springhouse. Oh, you can do better. Is it a good morning?
Speaker:Is God good? Come on,
Speaker:come on. God is good today.
Speaker:Well, I am so glad to be with you in the presence of the Lord.
Speaker:You'll have to forgive me if I'm limping a little bit this morning. I'm pretty
Speaker:sure I'm passing a kidney stone before you right now. But I'm gonna
Speaker:preach through this because I believe God's given me a word. So I'm gonna do
Speaker:it today. Before we get started, I have a few
Speaker:announcements. First of all, aren't we so thankful for the
Speaker:ministry of f. Stop doing pictures for us. Family
Speaker:pictures. If you came today, prepare to do family pictures that will be
Speaker:out there through the way to the fellowship hall. And if you came today and
Speaker:you didn't sign up but you'd like to have a family portrait, we'd be glad
Speaker:to do that for you as well. It's a free gift from us to you
Speaker:and they will have that back to you in time for Christma. Okay, a
Speaker:couple other things for us to just make note of. Okay? First of all, we're
Speaker:heading into Advent next week, which is the four weeks leading up to
Speaker:Christmas Day. And on December 5th and 6th, something very special is gonna
Speaker:be happening here. And it is our very own Springhouse kids
Speaker:production of A Star Is Born. And we want you to come and be a
Speaker:part of that on those nights. That's a Friday and a Saturday night,
Speaker:and then the day after on the 7th, we're gonna have a Springhouse
Speaker:Christmas party here. So what that's gonna look like if you wanna
Speaker:worship and word, we're gonna do that at 9am in this room. And then
Speaker:following that, at 11, we're gonna do a reprise of A Star Is Born. Yes,
Speaker:I believe it's gonna be that good. And we're gonna do a reprise of the
Speaker:show. And then we're gonna have lunch and there's gonna be candy and there's gonna
Speaker:be all types of fun things for the kids to do and you to do.
Speaker:Please make plans to come and celebrate with us during that
Speaker:very special time on December 7th. Then later
Speaker:on in the month, on December 19th, it's our annual Carols by
Speaker:Candlelight. And let me tell you, you're not gonna wa. Candlelight.
Speaker:Make a point to be a part of it. It's always a packed house and
Speaker:a rich time together. And then one of my favorite services of the year is
Speaker:on Christmas Day at 11 o'. Clock. And I'll tell you, I've been here nearly
Speaker:three decades, and I have only missed one Christmas Day.
Speaker:And I remember it. I remember the year I missed it. It
Speaker:is the thing that ties that day together. Please be a part of
Speaker:that, that day. It's 11 to 12. So we know you have plans with your
Speaker:family, and we will get you out of here on time for those
Speaker:plans. And then, man, you missed an incred incredible
Speaker:midweek series. Real Talk with Pastor Justin. So go back and look at that
Speaker:online. We will not be here this Thursday. Hopefully you'll
Speaker:be with family gathering, and we do not have midweek gathering again until
Speaker:January 8th. And so there will be no midweek gathering for the month of
Speaker:December. If you show up on Thursday night, hopefully somebody else shows up, too, and
Speaker:y' all can go to Starbucks and hang out. We won't be here, but
Speaker:we will be back on January 8th.
Speaker:Okay. It's Thanksgiving week, and so we are going
Speaker:to talk about the pathway to gratitude. Would you
Speaker:say that the pathway to gratitude.
Speaker:And so we're gonna draw from the book of Luke, hopefully a story that you
Speaker:are familiar with. So if you'll stand with me this morning, let's read with
Speaker:gusto and excitement this morning, because anytime
Speaker:God gives a word, it is exciting. Okay, here we go. As
Speaker:Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came
Speaker:to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home
Speaker:to him. She had a sister called Mary who sat
Speaker:at the Lord's feet listening to what he said. But
Speaker:Martha was distracted by all the preparations that he
Speaker:had been. She came to him and asked, lord,
Speaker:don't you care that my sister has left me to do the work by
Speaker:myself? Tell her to help me. Martha.
Speaker:Martha, the Lord answered, you are worried and upset
Speaker:about many things, but few things are needed, or
Speaker:indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is
Speaker:better, and it will not be taken away from her. Father, I
Speaker:thank you for your precious word. I thank you for the gift of your word.
Speaker:And I just pray, Lord, that it would minister to our hearts today. In Jesus
Speaker:name, amen. You may be seated. Well, I
Speaker:am extremely grateful for a lot of things, and
Speaker:first and foremost, I just have to tell you I'm thankful for
Speaker:macaroni and cheese. Planning
Speaker:on eating some of that golden deliciousness this year
Speaker:on Thursday? And I hope that you're planning on having some good food and that
Speaker:you're grateful for it. It is the season to be thankful. It's the season
Speaker:to be grateful. But might I suggest to you that the
Speaker:life of a believer should be saturated with Gratitude.
Speaker:I'm going to say that again. The life of a believer should be
Speaker:saturated with gratitude. But the culture with which we
Speaker:live, the culture, the society we live, we have reduced the time
Speaker:we've had to earmark a time to be thankful. And that is the
Speaker:fourth Thursday of the November month where
Speaker:we get together with family, some people who we actually don't like,
Speaker:and we invite them over our houses and they sit around our tables and
Speaker:we look at them and we have shallow conversations and we eat some pretty
Speaker:good food, hopefully. And then with the people that we really want to say thank
Speaker:you to, because we're such in a hurry, we'll send them a text message.
Speaker:Send them a text message and say, happy Thanksgiving. And if we're really in a
Speaker:hurry, we'll put them in a group message, because everybody loves a group text message
Speaker:with all of the thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, and all of
Speaker:the turkey emojis. And if you're really, really busy, you won't even have time to
Speaker:spell out the word thank you. You'll just put, ty.
Speaker:Isn't that the culture we live in? I'm
Speaker:thankful for macaroni and cheese. I'm thankful for friends
Speaker:who helped me not make tragic choices in my life.
Speaker:So tragic that even my baby was kind of scared to be held.
Speaker:I'm grateful this year to be your pastor,
Speaker:to walk alongside some of the most wonderful, fabulous, fascinating people
Speaker:in my life. I'm grateful for my family.
Speaker:I'm grateful that the Lord has given me Hadassah. He's given
Speaker:me Lucia, Ruby, Nora, and soon to be Eliana, and my
Speaker:wife Shari. I'm thankful. I'm thankful. But I'm not just
Speaker:thankful because a date on a calendar tells me to be thankful.
Speaker:I'm thankful because of the overflow of blessing
Speaker:the Lord has placed on my life. I believe that the mark
Speaker:of gratitude flows from the overflow of
Speaker:selflessness. Gratitude flows from the
Speaker:overflow of selflessness. So I want to
Speaker:talk today about the pathway of gratitude. And I want to start with a story
Speaker:that I recently heard that I thought really fit with today's message.
Speaker:There's this man who loves to fly. He loves to fly
Speaker:internationally, he loves to fly nationally, and he's a businessman. And
Speaker:he flies. And he flies frequently across seas. And his favorite airport
Speaker:is the London Heathrow Airport. Has anybody ever flown through London Heathrow?
Speaker:And so he loves that airport. And he doesn't love that airport because they
Speaker:are organized or on top of things or the flights get out
Speaker:faster or Anything like that. He likes it because there's this
Speaker:doughnut shop in this airport called Little Tiny
Speaker:Donuts. And every time he goes to London Heathrow Airport,
Speaker:he goes to this donut shop, Little Tiny
Speaker:Donuts, and picks up a box of eight fresh
Speaker:little mini donuts and eats them every single time. And so he has
Speaker:this itinerary, and it puts him in London Heathrow, and he's gonna go
Speaker:by and get those donuts just like he always does. And he's super excited. In
Speaker:fact, his entire day is wrapped around getting these donuts. And so he lands in
Speaker:London Heathrow for the layover. And
Speaker:when he gets to the layover, he's looking around and he goes and gets the
Speaker:donuts, and he's looking around for a place to sit. Because, see, the donuts are
Speaker:only good when they're fresh. The donuts are only good when they're fresh.
Speaker:And so he gets the donuts and he's looking for a place to sit, but
Speaker:he can't because there are tables everywhere, but there are tons of people in
Speaker:this airport, so he really wants to sit down. And he's looking around and he
Speaker:sees in the back, there's this round table, and there's this man sitting there, and
Speaker:he's reading a book. And there's one chair on the other side of this
Speaker:small round table. And so he goes up to the table and he makes eye
Speaker:contact with the man, and he nods to the chair, and the man nods to
Speaker:the chair and he says, okay, that's my invitation to sit down. And so he
Speaker:sits down and he's excited, and he puts his stuff down and he
Speaker:grabs his newspaper and he opens it up and he reaches his hand
Speaker:and grabs that first donut. And, oh, it was just delightful. He
Speaker:puts it in his mouth, he's chewing it up. It is everything he had hoped
Speaker:for for that day. So much so that before he actually consumed that entire
Speaker:donut, he reached his hand back in the box and put a second one in.
Speaker:He was really enjoying these donuts. Well, as
Speaker:he's chewing these donuts and enjoying the savory flavor of these donuts and reading the
Speaker:paper, something astonishing happened. The guy that was sitting on the other side of
Speaker:the table takes his hand, reaches across the table and
Speaker:grabs a donut out of the donut box.
Speaker:And the man reading the paper looked over at the man reading the book, and
Speaker:they make eye contact. And not only did he take one of the donuts out
Speaker:of the box, but he smirked at him while he did it. As if
Speaker:this was something acceptable, as if this was okay.
Speaker:And so the man reading the paper was not very happy about the man grabbing
Speaker:his donut. So he continues to read the paper,
Speaker:and he grabs another donut and puts it in his mouth. And he's just kind
Speaker:of like, what just happened here? And as he's thinking, what just happened here?
Speaker:The man across the table reading the book reaches out again and
Speaker:grabs another donut. And this time, the man
Speaker:reading the paper looks eyeball to eyeball to him while the other man's
Speaker:smiling and gives him this stare, blank, like, what are you doing?
Speaker:And so as he's staring him eyeball to eyeball, he reaches over, puts his hand
Speaker:in the donut box, slides the donut box toward him, pulls
Speaker:out another donut, pops it in his mouth. Hopefully he'll get the sign.
Speaker:Well, the guy with the book kind of straightens up, and he's smiling and happy
Speaker:and reaches further across the table and
Speaker:gets a third donut. On the third donut, the man closes the
Speaker:newspaper, slams it on the table with his hand, and says, I've gotta move.
Speaker:And so he reaches down to grab all of his stuff. And when he reaches
Speaker:down to grab his stuff on top of his bag, he sees a box of
Speaker:donuts that has not been opened
Speaker:the entire time. The man with the newspaper was eating
Speaker:the donuts that belonged to the guy with the book.
Speaker:Here we have a story of two heart postures. The first heart posture is,
Speaker:what's mine is yours. The second
Speaker:heart posture is, what's mine is mine. And if we
Speaker:ever live in a culture saturated with what's
Speaker:mine is mine, if we ever live in a culture that
Speaker:says, I've earned this. I bought this. I did
Speaker:this. And you wonder why the blessing of heaven can't
Speaker:flow free in your life because you are holding on so tight to
Speaker:what you have. I'm going to tell you right now, I believe with all of
Speaker:my heart the reason the Beshears family is able to walk through a season with
Speaker:a new house being built is because they opened their home when they had no
Speaker:room for multiple families to come stay with them. When you give out of
Speaker:your nothing, the Lord returns a whole lot to your behalf. He returns
Speaker:things to you many fold than you can ever imagine. And the Lord is
Speaker:blessing you guys because of your generosity and your willingness to open up what you
Speaker:have and say, there's always a place at my table. Is
Speaker:it said for you guys? Is it said of you that you always have room
Speaker:at your table or Are you one of the ones
Speaker:clenching with dear life every little thing that you have because your
Speaker:name is on it? Let's look at the pathway to
Speaker:gratitude by looking at five roadblocks. Five
Speaker:roadblocks that stop us from reaching a lifestyle
Speaker:of gratitude. Using the story of Mary and Martha,
Speaker:the first one I want to look at, the first roadblock to our pathway to
Speaker:gratitude is distraction. We
Speaker:are distracted.
Speaker:I didn't get an amen. I'm going to try that again. We are
Speaker:distracted. You are distracted.
Speaker:I am distracted. We are so. We are. We
Speaker:squirrel everywhere. Squirrel, squirrel, squirrel. We are
Speaker:so saturated with distraction. Can I tell you,
Speaker:I believe that we were not created to consume as
Speaker:much information as we consume our
Speaker:brains and our minds and our lives. We are
Speaker:overstimulated and over saturated. But here's
Speaker:what's so crazy about that. We give an amen when a statement like that's
Speaker:made, but we do nothing to stop it. In fact, we go chase it. We
Speaker:are looking for more information, looking for more stimulation, looking for more things
Speaker:to distract us. Busyness is not a
Speaker:badge of honor. The things
Speaker:that God has given you, he has graced you in certain things.
Speaker:Some of you are able to carry a load a lot heavier than the person
Speaker:sitting next to you. If God has graced you to do that, praise God for
Speaker:some of you, he has graced you to do fewer things. But
Speaker:may none of us step out of God's grace when he has given us something
Speaker:to do. How are the indicators? What are the indicators? Whenever
Speaker:we're stepping out of God's grace, the indicators are fatigue,
Speaker:family issues, being distraught, being
Speaker:sick. All of these are indicators that you may not be. If
Speaker:you're running on fumes all of the time, if the
Speaker:fruit of the spirit is not evident in your life, then
Speaker:you may not be leaning into the spirit.
Speaker:Imagine going to the gas pump and putting water in your gas tank.
Speaker:That's not going to last very long. You'll get some of the residue from the
Speaker:gas you had in before, but eventually your car's going to go kaput.
Speaker:Can I say it's the same thing with your life. We are
Speaker:so distracted. This is what the word says. But Martha was
Speaker:distracted by all the preparations that had to
Speaker:be made. Can I tell you that some of you hear this? Please.
Speaker:Some of you are going to get to Thursday. You're going to wake up
Speaker:early. You're going to go to bed that night and you're going to miss the
Speaker:entire day because you were distracted
Speaker:by all the preparation of Serving everybody else.
Speaker:Now we're going to have a turkey at my house, and my wife's going to
Speaker:have to make it. She gonna be preparing that
Speaker:turkey. But what. I don't. But I'm not saying that my wife
Speaker:is the only. I cook at my house too. Okay? Geez,
Speaker:Justin. Some
Speaker:of you guys are gonna make some great dry turkeys, okay? It's gonna be great.
Speaker:Okay, here's the deal. There are
Speaker:preparations that have to be made. See, here's the
Speaker:thing. We read this story about Mary and Martha, and we automatically assume that
Speaker:Martha has done something wrong. Think about it.
Speaker:We think Martha has just completely. She's just done something
Speaker:completely wrong. Like she shouldn't be preparing that Jesus is there. Do you notice at
Speaker:the end of the story, it never says Martha changed anything.
Speaker:It wasn't that Martha was necessarily doing anything
Speaker:wrong. It's that she had the wrong heart posture.
Speaker:You can be a preparer, you can be
Speaker:doing things, and you can be doing it with the wrong heart
Speaker:posture. In the same way, you can be doing nothing
Speaker:and be doing nothing with the wrong heart posture.
Speaker:It's all about heart posture. Jesus told Martha, you are worried
Speaker:and troubled about many things. When we are hurried, overwhelmed, overstimulated,
Speaker:or emotionally scattered, we literally use the ability to see the
Speaker:blessing that sitting right in front of us when we're
Speaker:going so fast. Brittany Grisham said something to me once that
Speaker:convicted the mess out of me. I was with her, and
Speaker:she was saying, kevin, I so enjoy walking alongside
Speaker:you, ministering alongside you. And I have. Brittany and I have
Speaker:ministered together since youth grew. I mean, we've. For a long time. But I went
Speaker:to her house one time and she said, but you know, Kev,
Speaker:the thing is, is I don't mind helping you get to the vision, but I
Speaker:just don't want to be trampled upon in the.
Speaker:You see, the thing that we are doing is not more important
Speaker:than the people we are doing it with. All of
Speaker:this, everything that you see here is all about
Speaker:God's people being restored to him and restored to
Speaker:one another. Everything has to do with relationship.
Speaker:Everything has to do with eternity. And
Speaker:we can get so mixed up on this turkey, it's got to look just right,
Speaker:be just right, and miss the whole point of everybody
Speaker:who's gathered around. Some distractions
Speaker:are not just there by happenstance. Some of the distractions you put in your life
Speaker:on purpose because you're trying to avoid a conversation that you need to have.
Speaker:Aren't you glad you came to church? This morning.
Speaker:Hurry overshadows the good stuff.
Speaker:Hurry overshadows the good, important stuff. I have a
Speaker:feeling. Has this PowerPoint been updated? Y' all have the most recent
Speaker:one up there? We're gonna find out in just a minute, aren't we? Okay.
Speaker:Martha wasn't necessarily doing something wrong. She was doing the right thing with
Speaker:the wrong heart condition. She was distracted, worried, overwhelmed,
Speaker:emotionally scattered. Jesus, says Martha. Martha, you are worried and
Speaker:troubled about many things. There was Christmas
Speaker:time, and I was just in a season where I was
Speaker:doing, doing, doing, doing, doing, doing, doing. You ever know anybody that's just always just
Speaker:doing, doing, doing, doing, doing. I was doing so much, and I was not
Speaker:focused on anybody around me. And I had a group of friends who wanted me
Speaker:to come over to their Christmas celebration. And I believe that I
Speaker:actually told them I was coming, and I didn't come. Have you ever told somebody
Speaker:you were gonna come and then you didn't? No. You guys are perfect. Okay,
Speaker:well, I made the mistake. I said I was coming, and I didn't come. And
Speaker:I thought to myself, I felt so bad because they just wanted to hang out
Speaker:with me. They just wanted to spend time, and I just felt so bad. So
Speaker:I said, you know what? I know what I'll do. I'm gonna go buy some
Speaker:massive Christmas gifts, and I'm just gonna bless em. And so I go
Speaker:to Target and I buy up the shelves and I wrap them up, and I
Speaker:go to their front doorstep, and I lay a pile of gifts right there. Right
Speaker:during the party, the party I was supposed to be at just laid gifts and
Speaker:walked away. I was so proud of myself. And so I walked away,
Speaker:and I just was going and going, and I. And I got
Speaker:in my car, and I'm just awaiting the text message,
Speaker:the text message that said, thank you so much for these wonderful gifts. You know,
Speaker:nobody said anything to me. The next day, I'm
Speaker:looking at my phone saying, maybe something's wrong. Maybe I didn't pay my phone bill.
Speaker:Surely they got these gifts. I mean, nobody gets gifts and doesn't say
Speaker:thank you. And I went through that day, not
Speaker:one thank you, not one message. And then I was ticked.
Speaker:And so the next day, I just said, well, you know what? Forget them. I
Speaker:text them and said, did you not see the gifts on your porch? And I
Speaker:got one response. And the response was this.
Speaker:You cannot buy your way into relationship.
Speaker:Presence with a CE is far greater than presence.
Speaker:Some of you need to take this into Friday of this week.
Speaker:Silence. You know what Friday is?
Speaker:Some of you need to take this into Friday and Saturday of this week because
Speaker:some of you are going to go into the negative in your bank account trying
Speaker:to buy relationships. When presence with a CE
Speaker:is all that is needed. Distraction
Speaker:hides blessings. Presence reveals them. Mary slowed down. She sat.
Speaker:She listened. You cannot be grateful for what you refuse to slow
Speaker:down long enough to notice. So
Speaker:distraction then leads to our second row barrier, which is not.
Speaker:This is the wrong slideshow. So I'm going to try to make
Speaker:this happen here, okay? Selfishness. When
Speaker:we stop appreciating people, we start
Speaker:expecting from them.
Speaker:Selfishness filters every decision
Speaker:through you. Selfishness filters
Speaker:every decision through you guys. I missed this this week with my
Speaker:nine month pregnant wife, Shari. I had an activity that I
Speaker:wanted to go do with a friend and I went and did that activity and
Speaker:she had asked. She didn't ask me to do anything all week. She asked me,
Speaker:would you come home and do this one thing at this specific time? And it.
Speaker:Oh, this is so bad. So horrible. It was an appointment I set up
Speaker:and I made her meet with the person and I stayed there. Horrible. I
Speaker:am the most selfish husband. Oh, Jesus, can y' all come pray for
Speaker:me right now?
Speaker:But can I tell you my wife loves me.
Speaker:And it was modeled in her response to my
Speaker:selfishness. You see, love's test
Speaker:happens when the rubber hits the road. Love's test
Speaker:is really about the response when somebody comes upon your path and
Speaker:wrongs you. And she responded with such
Speaker:grace. And I did not deserve it.
Speaker:Paul says to value others above yourself.
Speaker:Do nothing out of selfish ambition, but in humility, value
Speaker:others above yourself. Selfishness
Speaker:shrinks gratitude because it turns every blessing into not enough.
Speaker:Listen, Mary expected. Sorry. Martha expected
Speaker:Mary to serve her agenda. When we walk in selfish
Speaker:ways, we expect people to bow down to what we want in our
Speaker:agenda. Agenda.
Speaker:When we walk in selfish ways, we expect people to bow down to
Speaker:our agenda. Selfishness creeps in
Speaker:quietly. This is what the. It's. Ask these questions. Why am I doing all the
Speaker:work? Why isn't
Speaker:anyone here helping me? Why
Speaker:aren't they meeting my expectations?
Speaker:Selfishness is a roadblock toward gratitude.
Speaker:And if it's not distraction that leads to selfishness, the next thing it
Speaker:leads to is not. It's to
Speaker:Chili's.
Speaker:Sorry. It hurts to laugh. Okay, baby. No, it's
Speaker:chilies. Maybe macaroons. All right. It leads to pride.
Speaker:Pride. You're like, what did we miss in the first gathering?
Speaker:Pride is the next step after selfishness. Selfishness says,
Speaker:serve me pride. Says, my way is right
Speaker:as your pastor. The first thing, when I met with the elders
Speaker:and they conferred the appointment of lead pastor,
Speaker:and then we had a meeting with the leaders, the very first thing I asked
Speaker:for is, the very first request that I had from the leadership of this church
Speaker:is I said, I need your permission to fail.
Speaker:I need your permission to fail.
Speaker:I know it's astonishing to hear, but I am not always right.
Speaker:Shari knows that more than anyone. But I'm here to inform you that your
Speaker:pastor is not always right. But I know a God who always
Speaker:is. And I know what it
Speaker:looks like to have a bad attitude towards somebody who's not right and misses it.
Speaker:I know what it's like to respond the correct way to somebody who
Speaker:missteps or misses it. I'm not
Speaker:always right. Pride says, you're right. I'm right all
Speaker:the time. Martha stands over Jesus and says, lord, tell
Speaker:her to help me. Pride tells God how
Speaker:things should go. Have you ever tried that? How's that worked
Speaker:out for you? Pride makes your perspective the standard. It
Speaker:makes your expectation the requirement. It makes your experience the
Speaker:truth. Mary shows humility by sitting at
Speaker:Jesus feet. Martha shows pride by standing in accusation.
Speaker:James 4, 6 says this. God opposes the
Speaker:proud, but gives grace to the humble. Is there
Speaker:anybody here who needs grace? Raise your hand if you need grace. I just want
Speaker:to check. Litmus test here. Look at your neighbor and say, I need
Speaker:grace. Look at them and say, remember that Thursday.
Speaker:Okay?
Speaker:He gives grace to those who walk in humility, who are humble.
Speaker:Pride makes gratitude impossible because pride
Speaker:convinces you that everything you have is earned,
Speaker:owned, and deserved.
Speaker:When I taught back at the school at Lancaster, when I taught early
Speaker:on, when I started there, I was in a classroom full of students. And
Speaker:you know what? I thought I was the cat's pajamas when it came to teaching.
Speaker:I mean, I was like, I am the teacher. And
Speaker:I got in there and I taught this history lesson. And I knew
Speaker:that every student got the information that I was trying to convey because I
Speaker:did a great job presenting the information. And I was
Speaker:ready on that Friday to give them a test. Because, Scotty, I did my
Speaker:job. I taught and taught and taught, and they have better retained
Speaker:everything that I said. So I handed out that test
Speaker:and I collected that test. And I had about 12 students in that room, and
Speaker:eight students failed. And I was happy
Speaker:to give them all an F. F for you. F for you. F. Why?
Speaker:I taught the subject. I did my job. You didn't do your job
Speaker:retaining it. Can I Tell you just a sidebar. If you're a
Speaker:teacher and over half of your class fails the test, you
Speaker:didn't do a good job teaching. Okay.
Speaker:But arrogant, prideful Kevin thought, hey,
Speaker:I did my job and made the dumb mist. Going right into the
Speaker:faculty meeting with the principal saying, hey, I taught this thing, and I had
Speaker:eight kids fail the test. She came to my classroom, said, we're gonna have to
Speaker:remove you from this class.
Speaker:And she said, kevin, here's the thing you don't understand. When the
Speaker:student fails, the teacher has failed.
Speaker:And I had an epiphany that it wasn't about me
Speaker:giving information to see if they get it right. It was about me making
Speaker:sure that they owned and learned the material.
Speaker:And I have failed my students because of my arrogance and
Speaker:my pride. Gratitude only
Speaker:grows in humble soil. And so if you've
Speaker:got distractions that lead to selfishness, selfishness leads to pride.
Speaker:What does pride lead to? And this, guys, this is really. I'm honing in
Speaker:right here on what I want your takeaway to be right here. Because this week
Speaker:is a week where some of you are going to be sitting at tables with
Speaker:people that you don't want to sit at tables with.
Speaker:You're going to be conversing. Some of you have already gotten out of gatherings
Speaker:that you didn't want to go to. And it's because of this issue here,
Speaker:and it's not this one, because this is going to be. I'm going to get
Speaker:there. Bitterness.
Speaker:Distraction leads to selfishness. Selfishness leads to pride. Pride
Speaker:leads to bitterness.
Speaker:Martha says, lord, don't you care?
Speaker:You cannot hold bitterness and gratitude in the same heart.
Speaker:Let me say it this way. If you rehearse it in here,
Speaker:if you rehearse what happened in here over and over again, you
Speaker:can't release it here.
Speaker:This is what bitterness, bitterness looks like.
Speaker:I have never. I've struggled with bitterness in my life. I have
Speaker:never been bitter towards someone I didn't love.
Speaker:Are you with me? If I meet a random Bob and he
Speaker:does something wrong, and I've never. I don't have any relationship with him. I
Speaker:probably am not going to struggle with bitterness.
Speaker:But if you struggle with bitterness, if you've struggled with bitterness and you
Speaker:think of that person, it has to be somebody that you've had some
Speaker:relational equity with. And so
Speaker:what happens is this. You meet this person
Speaker:and you strike up a relationship with this person. And in
Speaker:this relationship, all these wonderful things happen.
Speaker:Wonderful life, wonderful conversations,
Speaker:experiences, adventures. Help when you're hurting.
Speaker:Prayer Just being there when you're down, being there when things
Speaker:go awry. I mean, just wonderful, incredible things
Speaker:take place in that relationship that bond you together. And
Speaker:then that person makes one bad choice.
Speaker:And all of a sudden, that one bad choice, that one
Speaker:mistake, that one mission, that one hurt,
Speaker:that one failure, overshadows everything
Speaker:that has been good in that relationship.
Speaker:And so we walk around like this with that
Speaker:bitter mistake, and we walk away from everything
Speaker:that brought that relationship to fruition. Every good and wonderful
Speaker:thing, we walk away from it because we're going to hold on to this one
Speaker:thing, this one choice, this one mistake. Some
Speaker:of us are going to go to tables this Thursday and sit down with
Speaker:somebody that you're holding a big old canister of bitterness toward.
Speaker:It robs us of the ability of seeing everything
Speaker:that brought the relationship to the forefront.
Speaker:We carry this around. I find it interesting that while we
Speaker:carry this for people, this is how we expect people to
Speaker:view us,
Speaker:Because we always got good stuff, right. I want you to view me in the
Speaker:positive light, while at the same time, I'm going to view
Speaker:my neighbor like this.
Speaker:Ephesians 4, 29 says this. Do
Speaker:not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but
Speaker:only what is helpful for building others up. Why do I start here? At the
Speaker:end of this scripture is going to address bitterness. Why do I start this? I
Speaker:was not going to start here, but I thought, you know what? No, this is
Speaker:a great place to start. Because out of the root of bitterness comes unwholesome
Speaker:talk according to their needs, that they may
Speaker:benefit those who listen. And then it says, do not
Speaker:grieve the Holy Spirit of God. Might I
Speaker:suggest to you, friends, that when you talk bad about other people,
Speaker:when you slander and you gossip, you are grieving the Holy Spirit. Holy Spirit
Speaker:of God, with whom you were sealed for the
Speaker:day of redemption. And then it says these three words. Say them with me.
Speaker:Get rid of all bitterness. Not
Speaker:some. Not. Okay, I can get rid of this because, you know, I liked your
Speaker:outfit and your hair today, so I think we're good now. You've paid enough
Speaker:penance for what you did to me, you know. Okay, you're so.
Speaker:No. Get rid of all bitterness, rage,
Speaker:anger, brawling, slander, along with every form of
Speaker:malice. And then it doesn't just. I love that God doesn't just tell us what
Speaker:not to do. He tells us what to do. It's not enough.
Speaker:Listen, it's not enough to just get rid of it. There's more.
Speaker:There's always more with God. Be kind and
Speaker:compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as
Speaker:Christ, God forgave you.
Speaker:In other words, let's look at this. Bitterness
Speaker:turns memories into weapons and rewrites a good
Speaker:story around the worst moment.
Speaker:In other words, bitterness revises
Speaker:your story so that the worst part becomes the highlight. The
Speaker:headline. Bitterness is like an emotional
Speaker:eraser. It wipes away every good memory that a person created.
Speaker:Bitterness narrows the story down to one moment, one
Speaker:wound, one disappointment. Bitterness blinds the
Speaker:heart. It breaks relationships. It blocks gratitude.
Speaker:The Bible warns that bitterness will defile everything it
Speaker:touches, including your ability to see the good in someone.
Speaker:And so if you start with distraction and it leads to selfishness, and
Speaker:then you're walking in pride and it leads to bitterness, Bitterness
Speaker:opens the door for the biggest blockade toward gratitude,
Speaker:and that is unforgiveness. It's the
Speaker:heaviest roadblock because you'll never reach
Speaker:gratitude if you stay chained to the past.
Speaker:Jesus responds to Martha not with anger, but with compassion.
Speaker:And there's only seven times that I can find in Scripture that the Lord says
Speaker:a name twice back to back. And this is one of them. He says, martha,
Speaker:Martha, have you ever been trying to get somebody's attention and you need them to
Speaker:listen to you? Scotty, Scotty,
Speaker:hear what I am saying to you.
Speaker:To respond out of compassion. Jesus does.
Speaker:Forgiveness breaks the chains. Forgiveness
Speaker:heals the heart. Forgiveness makes space for gratitude.
Speaker:Again, forgiveness is not pretending that the wound didn't hurt. I'm going to
Speaker:say that again. Forgiveness is not pretending that the wound didn't
Speaker:hurt. Guys, let me tell you something. You're gonna be hurt by the people
Speaker:who love you.
Speaker:In fact, just to make it a little more concrete, raise your hand if you've
Speaker:ever been hurt by somebody who loves you. Okay,
Speaker:so we're all pretty much on the same playing ground.
Speaker:So if we're on the same playground, why are so many of us holding
Speaker:onto it?
Speaker:Why are so many of us holding onto it? Several months ago, or
Speaker:several years ago rather, there was a situation where I felt like I
Speaker:really hear heard something from the Holy Spirit and I acted upon it.
Speaker:And the way that I went about it was completely wrong.
Speaker:And it caused hurt, it caused division, it caused a
Speaker:severing of a relationship. And I was broken and grieved because it
Speaker:never was my intention, but it is what happened.
Speaker:And there were moments in that severing of relationship I thought, this is
Speaker:never going to be repaired. And
Speaker:it wasn't going to be repaired with a flesh reaction. It was
Speaker:never going to be repaired with a flesh antidote.
Speaker:But do you know how gracious and wonderful our Holy
Speaker:Spirit is that he got into that other person's
Speaker:life? The one that had every right to walk out on my life,
Speaker:Every right to be upset, be hurt, be wounded, to hold on to bitterness.
Speaker:And you know that the Holy Spirit of God worked on their heart
Speaker:and they decided to sit across from me at lunch in tears and say, kevin,
Speaker:I forgive you.
Speaker:Can I tell you that our relationship has been so much better
Speaker:and deeper and more meaningful post that interaction than before?
Speaker:Because when the Holy Spirit gets involved and you
Speaker:surrender that hard space to him, what he does is he
Speaker:removes your flesh glasses and he gives you
Speaker:eternal ones. He gives you Holy Spirit glasses to
Speaker:see things the way he sees them, to see the person.
Speaker:Listen, I want to see you with the hurt I've experienced. I want to see
Speaker:you with this wound. But the Holy Spirit gets involved in these things. No,
Speaker:there's so much good. There's so much good.
Speaker:There's so much life. And if you'll just lay down your
Speaker:pride and your hurt, if you'll lay down that bitterness, I will
Speaker:show you all of the good things. And guess what? There's more.
Speaker:There's more to be had. But you gotta be willing to
Speaker:surrender. You gotta be willing to give it to the Lord. You gotta be willing
Speaker:to recognize that you are going to be hurt and other people are going to
Speaker:hurt you. And you're going to hurt people because we're broken.
Speaker:Colossians 3 says this. Therefore, as God's chosen people,
Speaker:holy and dearly loved, clothe yourself with compassion,
Speaker:kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. I hope
Speaker:that these are common things happening around tables this week on
Speaker:Thursday. But more than just this week, this would be a lifestyle and life
Speaker:posture of those who call themselves believers, Bear with each
Speaker:other and forgive one another. If you have a grievance against someone, forgive as
Speaker:the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues, put on love. You
Speaker:know what the very. You know what the most important word in that first sentence
Speaker:right there? Forgive as the Lord forgave you. You know what the most important word
Speaker:is? It's the word as.
Speaker:Because we read that and say forgive because the Lord forgave
Speaker:you. It's not what it says. It says
Speaker:forgive as the Lord forgave you.
Speaker:Has anyone been forgiven much from the Lord? Raise your hand,
Speaker:guys. If it's pride, if it's deceit, if
Speaker:it's lust, if it's theft, all the things I
Speaker:am a guilty person.
Speaker:I'm grateful for Mac and cheese. I'm grateful for friends. I'm
Speaker:grateful for family. But I am grateful that I am really redeemed because of the
Speaker:blood of Jesus Christ. I'm grateful that he sought
Speaker:fit to not draw lines, but to draw
Speaker:circles. I believe that true forgiveness draws circles and
Speaker:invites in. It doesn't draw lines. The big buzzword right now in the culture is
Speaker:this word boundaries. Make sure you create a boundary so you don't get hurt again.
Speaker:Make sure you put distance. Make sure you just keep everything separate in a
Speaker:way. And then we cleverly get into scripture and we weave our way to be
Speaker:able to preach that message. But here's the thing. I do believe in
Speaker:seasonal boundaries. When you're healing, that's important. But I do not
Speaker:believe in eternal boundaries because Jesus did not come up to me and say,
Speaker:kevin, I forgive you. Now I don't want anything to do with you for the
Speaker:rest of your life. He says, I forgive you. Now come back in.
Speaker:Let's try this again. And if we are to forgive
Speaker:as the Lord forgave, then guess what it is. Chance
Speaker:after chance after chance after chance after
Speaker:chance. And you, my friends. Kevin, I
Speaker:have the opportunity this week, today, to
Speaker:release, to surrender, to forgive, so that my life
Speaker:can be radically changed. And I won't just walk with somebody who's got Jesus on
Speaker:my shirt praising the Lord on all the situations that are
Speaker:going well. But I could be a testimony of Christ
Speaker:to a dying world in situations that look ugly, that
Speaker:look bad, that are fueled with hurt, hurt and woundedness, and all of those things
Speaker:that they can say, wow, I can't believe that Kevin had
Speaker:compassion on that person who didn't deserve it.
Speaker:We've been talking all year about the greatest stories
Speaker:ever told. What if one of your greatest stories was that this
Speaker:year you decided to let go, surrender and forgive somebody. Forgive
Speaker:the unforgivable. And somebody says to you, how'd you
Speaker:do it? And you say, I couldn't.
Speaker:It was the power of the Holy
Speaker:Spirit.
Speaker:True forgiveness draws circles, not lines. Martha was not
Speaker:irritated with a stranger. She was irritated with someone she loved.
Speaker:Have you ever been irritated with somebody you love? Some of y' all
Speaker:are irritated with the person you're sitting next to right now.
Speaker:Not every person is a blessing, but every single person is a lesson.
Speaker:And as people marked by forgiveness, we ought to also be people marked
Speaker:by gratitude. Jesus
Speaker:said, few things are needed. Indeed, only one.
Speaker:There are some important people in my life that have
Speaker:been in my Life. Some of these people, you know,
Speaker:the man on the left, his name is Mike Gibson. And Mr.
Speaker:Mike, man, he was such a blessing to my life. There was a season when
Speaker:I was being. I was the youth pastor and I was with the youth. And
Speaker:man, I just, I felt alone. I felt like I didn't have any support.
Speaker:I don't mean that this was true, but this is how I felt. I didn't
Speaker:have any support. I didn't have people rallying around me. And I went and I
Speaker:shared that with the elders. And do you know that that next week Mr. Mike
Speaker:came up to you youth. And every week after that, he came up and just
Speaker:stood there and all he did was pray for me. Said, I'm here, what do
Speaker:you need? I'm here for you. The second lady, or the first lady in
Speaker:the picture, her name is Rena Montgomery. Rena was my bus driver as a high
Speaker:school student. She was the very first person who said anything to me
Speaker:when I came to Smyrna assembly. I dawned the doors. I saw two things in
Speaker:that old sanctuary. I saw a disco ball and I saw Rena Montgomery.
Speaker:Rena screamed out loud. She was so excited to see me.
Speaker:And she was a blessing and an encouragement to my life. And the last one
Speaker:there, her name is Margaret Meek. She was the kids pastor here forever. And she
Speaker:was like a second mom to me. I will tell you right
Speaker:now, I would not be lead pastor of this church had it not been for
Speaker:this woman and her investment in my life. Now, the things
Speaker:outside of them having significant impact in my life. The things that these three have
Speaker:in common is that they're all with Jesus, Jesus right now.
Speaker:Margaret, at our funeral, Arwen, her
Speaker:daughter got up and said, you know,
Speaker:oftentimes we look for extraordinary moves of God and
Speaker:extraordinary moments, and we think that those are the moments we're going to remember most
Speaker:to the people we're closest with. But she said, that's not what I
Speaker:found with my mom. She was talking about Margaret. She said,
Speaker:I find it in the ordinary days. And so
Speaker:with that I got a little plaque that or a little thing that I put
Speaker:in my office and it says, enjoy the gift
Speaker:of the ordinary. Enjoy
Speaker:the gift of the ordinary. Guys, if you're carrying this,
Speaker:don't let this become ordinary. You have the choice
Speaker:to not let this be the ordinary. This could be the
Speaker:ordinary. And I tell you, this is so much more fun and more delicious,
Speaker:more filling.
Speaker:So what I say is, if I were to see, I
Speaker:don't know what's going on right now with the clicker. But if I were to
Speaker:see these three people, if I were to see these three people again,
Speaker:I wouldn't spend time. If I, you know, have you ever. Has anybody ever had
Speaker:somebody pass away and you're like, if I had one more moment. Moment. If I
Speaker:had 30 more seconds, if I had one more minute. If I had whatever.
Speaker:I wish I had one more minute with each of those. I wouldn't tell them,
Speaker:look what I've done. Look what I've. See, See what? What's happened in my life.
Speaker:I wouldn't say that to them. I probably wouldn't even say I love them. I
Speaker:wouldn't ask them what it is to be like to be with Jesus. I would
Speaker:simply say two words to them. Thank you.
Speaker:Thank you. Now, here's what
Speaker:I've learned this year. You are
Speaker:probably sitting by a person with whom you
Speaker:are so grateful for, yet it has
Speaker:been an eternity since you have actually conveyed your gratitude
Speaker:to them. Well, they know. They know. They live with
Speaker:me. They see it. They know. And you haven't put in words. And I don't
Speaker:know what that is, that little wall that comes. You're closest to that person
Speaker:yet. It just seems so hard to actually express gratitude. Well, guess what?
Speaker:I'm about to give you an opportunity today because this is going to be a
Speaker:different year. 2025 is going to be a different year. It's going to be a
Speaker:year where Thanksgiving is just the springboard to a lifestyle of
Speaker:gratitude. And so everyone, on most of the chairs, there was this
Speaker:thank you card. This was just a reminder because
Speaker:your someone may not be next to you right now,
Speaker:but I'm going to ask you to do something in the next few moments. They
Speaker:may be sitting across the room here, they may be sitting next to you, but
Speaker:we're just going to take a few moments. We're going to steal a few
Speaker:moments here and we're just going to look people eyeball to eyeball. And
Speaker:you're not just going to say thank you. You're not going to say Ty or
Speaker:happy Thanksgiving. You're going to
Speaker:say Barbie, I'm so grateful that you see me, me. I'm so
Speaker:grateful for the way that you have run beside me so faithfully all these years.
Speaker:The way that you lift my arms and you encourage me. I'm so grateful
Speaker:for the staple that you're in my life. The person who never wavers,
Speaker:never goes away. The rock that I can lean on
Speaker:if I'm in distress or if I'm discouraged. I can always count on you. The
Speaker:moments when I ran after other things. I looked back and those things fell in
Speaker:shambles. And you were always there. You never wavered on me. And I'm so
Speaker:grateful for your friendship. Thank.
Speaker:To express our gratitude to one another. Put it into words.
Speaker:Now. Allow the Lord to begin to develop a
Speaker:culture of gratitude within your life and within this house.
Speaker:Would you stand with me? And we're going to take the next few moments and
Speaker:you move about the room as you need to. And let's give thanks today.
