What if the thing you're most passionate about is actually pointing you toward the calling God has for you?

Have you ever wondered what you're supposed to do with your life—or felt pressure to figure out your calling before you're even sure what you're passionate about?

Kayla Swallow offers a different way to think about purpose: instead of starting with “What do I want to be?” start by asking, “What problems do I want to solve?”

Kayla never expected her path to lead her into child welfare. After earning a degree in Human Services and spending several years serving with Young Life, she eventually found herself working with children entering foster care. Today, she serves as the Program Manager of group care facilities for Skookum Kids, caring for children during some of the most vulnerable days of their lives.

In this conversation, Kayla shares how paying attention to what breaks her heart helped shape her calling. She talks about the courage it takes to try things that scare you, the importance of showing up for people in the middle of their mess, and how God can use the things we care deeply about to lead us toward purpose.

Kayla also shares how growing up with a single mom who had cancer shaped her understanding of community and taught her that people need people. Her story is a beautiful reminder that our passions don't have to be separate from our faith—they can become invitations to join God in the work He's already doing.

If you're feeling stuck, unsure of your purpose, or wondering how your passions fit into God's plan, this conversation will encourage you to stop demanding that you have the whole path figured out. Instead, pay attention to what moves you, what breaks your heart, and where you feel called to show up.

Your passion may be pointing you somewhere.

Meet Kayla Swallow

Kayla Swallow graduated from Western Washington University in 2015 with a degree in Human Services. She spent several years serving with Young Life, including at Malibu Club in British Columbia, before transitioning into child welfare.

Today, Kayla serves as the Program Manager of group care facilities for Skookum Kids, caring for children during their first few days in foster care. She's passionate about showing up for vulnerable people, creating community, and helping others discover where their gifts and passions can make a difference.

Kayla is also an avid outdoorswoman who loves walking her dog through her neighborhood and waving at her neighbors.

Key Takeaways

• When you're unsure of your calling: Instead of obsessing over what you should be, start paying attention to what you care deeply about.
• When something breaks your heart: Ask whether that passion might be pointing you toward a problem God is inviting you to help solve.
• When you're afraid to try something new: You won't know what you're capable of until you're willing to show up and try.
• When you feel like you need the whole plan: Remember that calling often unfolds through small steps, unexpected opportunities, and a willingness to say yes.
• When the world's problems feel overwhelming: You don't have to solve everything. Find where you can faithfully show up and make a difference.

How This Episode Will Encourage You

You don't have to have your calling perfectly figured out. Start with what you're passionate about, pay attention to what breaks your heart, and ask God where He might be inviting you to show up. Your passion may be more connected to your purpose than you realize.

Skookum Kids

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Welcome to the Collide Podcast. We're a growing community of everyday chicks colliding with Jesus in our mess, our pain, our joy, and our stories.

We value showing up as we truly are, so that's what you'll find here. Walls and masks being torn down so that we can allow Jesus to meet us where we truly are and hear about other women doing the same.

We can't wait to collide with you.

I've stopped asking, what do you want to be when you grow up? And I've started asking him, like, what kind of problems do you want to solve? You know, what things are you interested in?

What do you want to learn about as you get older?

Hey, guys. Welcome to the Collide Podcast.

I'm Willow Weston, the founder and director of Collide and the host of this podcast that comes to you weekly if you're a subscriber. If you're not, you should be. And then you'll get notification of these great conversations coming into your inbox on a weekly basis.

She got a degree in human services, and she's currently the program manager of group care facilities for Skookum Kids, and that is an organization that serves foster children. And we'll hear more about that. Kayla is the sweetest, kindest person.

She's an avid outdoors woman, and she enjoys walking her dog through her neighborhood, waving at the neighbors. We are going to learn so much about the way that God shows up in her life and calls her to service today.

And I think he'll show up in our lives as we learn from her. So, Kayla, thanks for hopping on the podcast today.

Thanks so much for having me.

Yeah, it's fun. You have done a lot of work in your young life. And I say young life because you're in your 20s investing in kids.

You spent years investing in kids in. In the ministry, Young Life, and then at Skookum Kids, working with foster kids.

Like back up to how God led you into this work of investing in the work of kids.

Yeah, I honestly don't think that I ever thought I was going to work with kids. And I especially never thought that I was going to work in child welfare.

I started kind of, you know, dabbling in, what do I want to do and what problems do I want to solve?

When I was in college trying to pick out my major, I landed in Human Services, which is literally just a program designed for people who want to be professional helpers. And that is exactly what you're going to do if you get a degree like that.

I had been involved with the student ministry Young Life for a few years while attending college and had a great opportunity after college to go into intern at the Malibu Club, which is one of their summer camping properties up in British Columbia. So I went up there and I served for a few years as an intern and then I came on board as a full time staff and I loved it.

The ministry of Young Life camping is to give kids the best week of their lives.

And that means going above and beyond to show kids that they are welcome and that they are loved and that they are cared for and everything from how nicely the bed is made when they arrive in their cabin to how fun their group activities can be with their young life leader. I just loved that, you know, go big or go home mentality of showing kids how much they're loved in that setting.

And then how did you move from that experience of working on Young Life staff and, and really doing that kind of work to doing what you're doing now? Because that's very different work.

It's incredibly different work.

I sometimes joke that I went from caring for kids in the best week of their life to caring for kids in what is very sadly and truly the worst week of their lives. I run group homes that care for young children the first few days that they spend in foster care.

So kids are removed from their home for any variety of reasons and they spend their first few nights at a facility that's called the Skookum House.

It is a temporary shelter for kids entering care where they really just get a chance to be kids and to play and to kind of have a soft landing place into foster care.

When I was still living up at the summer camp, my now roommate and best friend Catherine and I would send like Instagram foster moms back and forth to each other and we would read their stories and kind of hear about what their lives look like. And we were like, wow, foster care is so big and so complex and we like didn't have any idea.

And so we kind of just started dabbling and being like, this is amazing work that people are doing. And around that same time, the organization that I work for, Skookum Kids, was just starting up and was just growing.

And I'd heard because they were back in my college town, you know, that they were growing exponentially and that they needed some more people, and they had this great vision and this great culture. So I reached out to their executive director. I just sent him, I think, like, a cold call, and I said, would you get coffee with me?

Like, I know you don't know who I am. I don't know who you are, but you guys sound cool, and you're about what I'm about.

And I think he and I Talked for maybe 20 minutes about books and summer camping, because those were two things we both had in common. And, you know, I left that conversation, and he was like, hey, when you're, like, ready to leave camp, give us a call.

And, like, let's see maybe if we have any jobs opened up.

And, you know, six months later, I was doing an interview over Zoom before Zoom was the norm, because I lived so far away and took a little bit of a leap of faith and took a job before I had met anyone in person and took a job before I had seen the program I would be running in person. So I said yes to a job. And then a couple weeks later, I drove down to Bellingham and. And toward the facility that I would start running.

Wow, that's crazy. I love that you put yourself out there, that you just reached out and said, I'm about, and I'm what you're about. Let's meet.

That's just bold and confident. And I. I keep hearing.

In fact, I think the last three podcast interviews I've done are stories where it took a woman stepping out and saying, hey, I have something to bring to the table, or, hey, like, I don't want to sett for this position. I think I have more to give in this organization. And here you are saying, hey, let's talk.

I. I love that we need more of that boldness in our lives, and it's inspiring. So here you are, and you're doing this important work. I'm sure the learning curve has been immense.

As you talked about, you were working with kids in the best week of their lives, and now you're working with kids in the worst week of their lives. Do feel like you show up for work every single day and your heart breaks? What's that like?

I think I hope that my heart breaks. I think there's this fear in foster care that maybe will become numb to the experiences and numb to the stories around us. You know, it is. It is true.

I hear some of the saddest stories. I see. See some of the saddest things. But at the end of the day, kids are kids.

So when I show up to work, like, yes, we're working through big and hard emotions.

And yes, kids are out of their comfort levels and they're scared, but they still just want someone who's going to get on the floor and build Legos with them. So, yes, I still end up crying in a minivan sometimes at work.

There is a joke around our office that we need T shirts that say, my job makes me cry in a minivan. Because that is just something that happens if you're a feeler, and I'm a feeler, but I think we also.

And I won't speak for my team, but maybe I'll speak for myself. You kind of just figure out how to. How to do it without it emotionally devastating you.

You kind of figure out how to show up and how to, you know, stay in your lane and say, hey, I can't hand.

Or, you know, I'm not responsible for anything that happens outside the three to five nights that this kid is with us, but we're going to care for them really, really well while they're here and while they're with us.

So kind of just keeping that focus on allows me to not detach from the sadness and the reality of the situation, but it allows me to stay focused in what. What we're trying to accomplish.

Yeah, absolutely. I mean, I think that compartmentalization is helpful for us to stay in our lane and like, actually really be effective in our work.

I mean, I think about so often I'll be asked to go speak places, and the hardest speaking opportunities I get are usually at camps where I'll go spend, you know, four to six days with a group of students and hear these tragic stories of what they're going home to.

And the day we have to say goodbye is so hard because it's one thing to pour out and invest and remind them that they matter and that their lives matter and that. That God cares about them, but then you're sending them back into hell and into a battle, and it's easy to get overwhelmed by that.

But when you get overwhelmed by that, I find, like, I can't stay focused to, okay, I can't change that. But what I can do is make an impact, make a mark this week that I've been called to. So I love that you're. You're trying to figure that out.

I'm sure that's really hard for you every single day when you're hearing all these hard stories. Yeah, you.

You keep investing in kids, you know, whether it's, you know, kids who haven't experienced trauma and now kids who experience trauma on the regular. You're showing up for kids every single day. Did you have someone who showed up for you as a kid when you needed it?

Oh, yeah. I was raised by a single mom who had cancer.

And so we had an amazing, amazing church family that I grew up with who, like, rallied and took care of us and brought us meals and made sure someone was driving me to and from soccer practice and all the things like that. And I'm just such a believer that it takes a village to do the work of raising kids. And it takes, you know, just, like, a team of people to be there.

If parents can't. That's kind of very similar to what foster care is. Parents need support.

And so there, you know, are people who step and say, hey, we're gonna, like, bring kids in our home and care for them.

When you think back to you walking through that experience of your mom having cancer and she was your only, like, your. Your single mom. She was your. Sounds like your main parent present that you lived with. You must have had great needs.

I mean, I was raised by a single mom, too. When people came in and gave or served or helped, did you have to sort of learn how to receive?

I mean, you know how it's so easy to just say, we're good, we're good. How do you think that shaped you to have to sort of receive service from other people?

Hmm. I think maybe I'm still. I think maybe I'm still learning that. I don't know that I am great at receiving help.

I think maybe my, like, natural instincts is to not want to be a burden on people or not want to be needy in any way. So I think I try to fight against that.

But I think it's also, you know, if people want to care for you and show you love, loving them means allowing them to do that. So kind of figuring how to balance that.

Yeah. It's so interesting because I imagine you probably did a lot of caretaking for your mom as well.

Yeah. But, you know, why would you not? I love my mom.

So, you know, she took great care of us, and when we were kids, my brother and I got to take care of each other.

And I think that we have an amazing, amazing relationship in bond now because we, you know, kind of went through that experience together, and that has shaped us probably in more ways than we even know or realize. But I think we have stronger bonds because of it.

Yeah. I would imagine that it's definitely shaped you. And you keep showing up and serving other people when they're in their time of need.

And you know what it's like to have people show up for you. It's so beautiful that you do what you do.

I. I want to kind of back up to Kayla in, like, high school college days and the pressure of the question that we often put on kids, which is, you know, what are you going to be when you grow up? Did you feel that pressure? Did you have a sense when you were in high school, college that you'd go into, like, the nonprofit or ministry sector?

Take us back to that question. What are you going to be when you grow up?

Yeah, I. I thought I was going to be a teacher. You know, I think there's this weird mentality of, like, oh, you're a teacher, you're a doctor, you're a lawyer.

You know, you're something that is very much like, preset out, and there's a path and you get on it and you take it. And it was kind of in college that I really started, you know, wrestling with this idea that was less of like, what do I want to be when I grow up?

And more of who do I want to be when I grow up? Like, what are the things that are important to me? What are the things that matter? You know?

And kind of along that way, I was like, oh, I love to solve problems. I want to be a problem solver. That's what I want to do.

You know, how can I find positions and opportunities and organizations that will let me solve problems? I love making a good system.

I love taking something that's like, oh, this isn't effective or efficient, and turning it maybe, hopefully, you know, into something that's going to be more streamlined in order to care for people. So I love doing things like that.

Yeah, that's awesome. You mention this. This sort of mentality around, are you going to be a doctor, a teacher, a lawyer?

And that there's this, like, you know, specific path. And clearly the Lord has put you on a path and unfolded something that maybe you didn't expect.

And you've revisited this idea a couple times, and I like it, and I want to talk about it. You've mentioned that you've asked yourself, what problems do I want to solve?

How did you go about answering that and figuring out what problems your life wants to be a part of solving?

I think if you put yourself in a position of saying, okay, God, like, what breaks your heart? Let it break mine.

Your eyes are going to start to see where things are lacking for other people and where other people need services or resources or care. So a lot of it for me was like, where are we missing? Like, where do we have gaps? Where do we have holes? And like, we can, we can fix it.

We're smart, capable, strong people. We can fix things. You know, we just have to put the work in for it.

And I think that my organization, Skookum Kids, is doing an amazing job of finding out, like, where are the like, pain points of foster care and like, what can we, like, what can we bring to the table to make things smoother and easier for kids and for parents?

And so I think a lot of it is just that idea of if you pay attention, you're going to find where, where people need you and where people need other people. You just have to maybe, and maybe this is like a little woo woo, but you have to slow down a little bit enough to like see it and to notice it.

Life is busy and life is fast.

And so if you're not being intentional about keeping an eye out for those things, they're going to pass you by because you know, people who need help and opportunities, they're not going to be screaming at you. They're just going to be sitting, waiting for someone to notice them.

I think you're inviting us to tap into our passion.

And one of the things that I saw over and over again when I was in college ministry for like over the course of a 12 year span, it didn't matter the generation, you know, from when I first started to, when I ended in college ministry, I would see college students so stressed out about this pressure of what am I going to be when I grow up? And they just felt like they had to pick something.

And you know, then I'm meeting with a student who, you know, finally got into the school of education and they studied to be a teacher and then they finally got a student teach and then they have a breakdown because they realize they don't even like kids. And it wasn't that they chose the path because they asked what kind of problems do I want to solve?

They chose the path because it sounded wanted, like something that gave them a career, gave them a salary, something that they could do, like they felt capable of doing. But at the end of the day, when they experienced it, they didn't feel passionate about it.

Obviously some teachers are very passionate, but I'm saying I would run into this problem all the time where you're suggesting, ask Yourself, what are the problems I want to solve? And that taps into that passionate place.

My daughter recently, in one of her classes, and I don't remember what class it was, but she was telling me that the teacher gave an assignment and asked every kid to come up with a cause that they wanted to fight and be a part of, bringing a solution to.

And then there was going to be a debate in class, and students were, you were going to propose the cause that you want to be a part of, and students were going to argue with you on whether or not that was the best cause to choose out of all the causes kind of a.

Thing, how would you choose? That's wild.

Well, that's what I said. I said, well, what are you going to choose?

And she said, well, the teacher gave the example of she would choose the Humane Society because she loves animals and she wants to be a part of helping animals. So she gave this. This whole talk on the teacher did, on why she would choose that.

And so my daughter Bella said, so almost everybody chose animals, the cause of animals. And I thought, that's so interesting because. And I said, so are you going to choose that, too?

Because she gave the example, and it sounds like an easy choice. Get the. Get the assignment done. And she said she's going to think about it, do some research.

Well, her and my husband spent some time thinking about and talking about it. One night I came home from work and she goes, oh, I picked my topic. And I go, what's that? And she goes, I'm going to do the cause of fighting cancer.

And I said, well, why did you pick that? And she said, because grandpa has cancer and Aunt Jan Lee had cancer, and she's listing off people in our family that have had cancer.

And so her cause, the solution she wants to be a part of, came from a place of experiencing the pain. And so it was really like a personal passion. And I think you bringing up this idea of you asking yourself, what problems do I want to be a part of?

Is such an incredible invitation for people who are trying to rethink what do I want to be when I grow up instead of just choosing a path because they're capable. Well, of course you're capable. You're capable of a lot of things, but what are you passionate about? I love. I love that question so much.

Yeah. And I. I've started asking that to the. To the kids that we care for, you know, in making conversation and getting to know them.

I've stopped asking, what do you want to be when you grow up? And I've started asking them, I'm like, what kind of problems do you want to solve? You know, what, what things are you interested in?

What do you want to learn about as you get older? And that, I mean, that lights a spark in them. That is so different than just saying what do you want to be?

Because then their answer is like a firefighter, which is great. And please be firefighters. We need that. That's wonderful. But it's like lit a spark in them.

And they're like, oh, I want to learn about like snakes in the Amazon. And I'm like, oh my gosh, that's amazing. Tell me more.

And then it just like, you know, spirals from there and, and that it just lights a little bit more of a spark in them when you word it that way.

Yeah. I love that.

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So here you are and you're doing this amazing work and you're showing up every day and you're making a sacrifice. It truly takes a sacrifice to do nonprofit or ministry work. What helps you get up every day and make that sacrifice? Kayla?

I love the kids and I love our team. We are made up. We're primarily volunteer based.

So we are made up of about 100 community members from western Washington who, you know, they have, they have this collective mindset of like, oh, we can do better and be better for kids.

It's, it's very typical in the foster care world that without a program like this, kids are spending their first couple days in foster care either sleeping in a motel at night with a social worker or maybe being bounced from place to place each night. And what we know about kids coming from trauma transition, that is obviously less than ideal.

So the fact that there are community members who give of their own time and their own energy and their own resources to come into hold a baby or push A stroller or take kids out for ice cream. That encourages and inspires me. We have the best people. We don't deserve them.

I'll say that until I have no more lung or no more air in my lungs, I will speak their praises, you know, but also that the kids are, are amazing. My team, our staff, we talk a lot about, you know, our, the queen of our lives, Brene Brown's quote of like, you can't selectively numb yourself.

And so we talk all the time about like, this is such, such hard work. But if we chose to numb ourselves from the hardness of that, we would also numb ourselves from the, like, beauty and the joy that we get to see.

You would expect that, that a shelter like ours would be a sad place. And it is at times, it totally is.

But it is also the happiest place where we get to throw birthday parties and we get to teach babies how to walk and kids how to ride bikes.

And I can't tell you the amount of drawings kids have made me or like cards kids have made me that I don't think I'll ever be able to get rid of them. Some of my happiest moments have happened in that house. Just the joy of kids getting to be kids.

And you know, they, they pay me to take kids to the park and like, what fun that is. And you know, what a joy it is that, that, that's my like grown up job is. It's unreal to me still sometimes.

I love listening to you talk about the joy that you receive from the service you're doing.

And I really think that your story can speak for your generation, that your generation is not all lost, that you're doing some amazing things in this world. And I feel like your generation gets a little bit of slack, like flack, I should say, from older generations.

There's sort of an attitude sometimes from older generations that, oh, this new generation, they're just going to hell in a hand basket, you know. But to hear the work that you and other young people are doing is so beautiful.

What do you see your generation doing that's making this world a better place? How are you proud of, of people in their 20s right now?

And I'm biased because I love my community. I have a, I have a great, great team. I love them a ton. But they are, they are people who go the extra mile.

They're not people who like clock out and are like, oh, I'll like, take care of it tomorrow. They're people who show up and who celebrate really well. I Also think that my generation in general, we're not turning a blind eye to things.

I think that there was a lot of, like, oh, that's like, their problem, their issue. Like, not my circus, not my monkeys. And I think our generation is like, oh, it's not happening next door to me, but it's happening across town.

Like, that still matters and is still important. I think that going the extra mile and then I feel like this is a people who celebrate really well.

Not my circus, not my monkeys. That's hilarious.

What do you, as a young Christian woman who is following after God's call in your life, what do you feel like you need from people older in the faith? What do you need from their leadership, their investment, their role as mentors?

Yeah. Encouragement and a safe place to vent. I would not be able to have my job and be able to do it without a couple that I have here in Bellingham.

They are. They are my people. They are who I go to when I'm tapped and at the end of my rope. They're the people who pray over me and check in on me.

You had them on the podcast not too long ago, the Zenonians. They're the ones. Yeah, they're fantastic. You know, and I. And I think that that's what it is.

Like, they know that my job is draining, and they know that it's really big and a big commitment, and they're the ones who, you know, will let me have, like, a four second pity party. And then they're like, all right, chin up, kid. Like, here we go. Let's fill your bucket so you can get back out there to do the good and holy work.

So I think safe spaces. I think that they have done an amazing job of not needing me to sugarcoat anything.

And if I need to just, like, verbally dump everything, they take it. And then they also say, absolutely, let's validate your feelings.

But then also, like, let's remind you of, like, who you are and whose you are and, like, the greater purpose behind the work that you're doing. I've had a lot of, like, come to Jesus moments in this job of, like, I can't do this. How can I keep doing this?

And they have done a great job of reminding me, like, oh, no, you can and you will, because that's who you are. And that's, like, how Jesus has, like, invited you into this life. So.

I love that so much because we all need those spaces, and we all need those voices in our lives, and we can all be those spaces.

And those voices, I think sometimes the older generation, even in the work we do at Collide, where we'll oftentimes, like at a conference, invite women, if they want mentors, to sign up for mentoring and invite women who are older in the faith to sign up to be mentors. And the numbers are so not equal.

I mean, we get so many people who want mentors, and so many of the older people don't feel like they have, quote, unquote, what it takes to mentor. And I think so much of mentoring is exactly what you're describing.

That you have with the Zeno means, like, people just to come alongside you and be a space and a refuge and a safe place and a voice to speak into your life, to keep going, keep doing what you're doing, get back up. We all need that. And so that. That just gives people inspiration who are listening, who are older in the faith to say, I can do that.

I can do that for someone. I. That's. I don't have to know the Bible in and out and have it memorized. I don't have to, like, hang out with someone every single day.

I don't have to, you know, have them move into my house. But I be a safe space and a voice. It's. It's doable.

I'm.

I'm such a big believer that, you know, bottom line, baseline people just need other people, and them showing up or making themselves available makes all the difference.

Kayla, when you think about young women who are listening to this podcast right now and they're trying to figure out what they want to be when they grow up and they're feeling a lot of pressure, what's your best advice for them?

Try things that scare you. I didn't think I wanted to do child welfare. I thought it was going to be too hard and that I wouldn't have enough patience or compassion.

And I think that that was so true. I have, I've, you know, it was like drinking out of a fire hose to learn the world of child welfare. And I was absolutely terrified.

But if you just keep showing up day after day after day, you will learn like, like, you will have enough patience, you will have enough strength to do the hard things that scare you. But you don't know that unless you show up. You don't know it unless you try. Try things that seem a little bit outside the box.

Reach out to people, ask people about their jobs, ask them about what they love and what they don't love.

You know, I think that there's a lot of power in asking someone, hey, can I have 20 minutes of your time to buy you a cup of coffee to, like, learn about what you do and why you do it? Especially if you're.

If you are someone who can see yourself in, you know, lots of different places or different fields in a career, I think it's great to interact with people who are currently doing the work to get an understanding of why.

Such good advice. You know, you're in your 20s, so you can look forward and you can envision your 30s, your 40s, your 50s, your 60s, your 70s, I imagine.

What do you most hope to emulate about Jesus as you follow his calling in your life through the decades ahead?

I hope that I keep showing up for the most vulnerable people. I think that Jesus got his hands dirty being with people.

I think that maybe there's part of me that wishes that I would be someone who would be super content just like, I don't know, sitting behind a desk, answering emails. But I don't. That's not how Jesus operated. He was with people. His hands were dirty. He was right in the thick of their vulnerability.

And I hope that I get to continue to be in positions where I get to be with people in, like, the thick and the mess of life.

Thank you for showing up for kids in the most vulnerable times of their lives and for showing up for us today. Kayla, how can people connect with you and the work you're doing?

Yeah, they can. Find out more about skookum [email protected] Skookum is spelled S K O o K U m and then kids k I-org awesome.

Thank you for hanging out.

Yeah, thanks so much, Willow.

Yeah, and for those of you listening, my great hope for you is that you continue to listen, pay attention, ask hard questions about what problems you want to solve, and follow after God's call in your life. He can use you to show up for people and change lives. And we're right there with you doing the same thing. We'll catch you next week.

Thanks for tuning in to keep up with us.

You can find us on Instagram at We Collide on Facebook as Collide Women and you can also visit our website at wecollide.net to find our blog, resources, event information, and more. One last thing. If you enjoyed this episode, would you take a few seconds and leave us a review? Review.

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