I am the dove

by GiGi

I am the dove.

My song is mournful,

a single nerve splitting cry out

in pain

because it’s fucking raining

and pouring

with pressure and bullshit

and there’s nothing I can do to stop it

and it feels like I’ll absolutely burst

before a diamond is formed.

I am the dove.

I bring the water

through tears

and motherhood

and a basket of fresh laundry

that always happens to wind up on the bed,

in a lump,

similar to the one stuck in my throat

from all of the words

that I want to spit

in your face.

I am the dove.

So instead of spitting on you,

I scream at myself

and I cry out to God asking,

“WHY?!”

Even though I already know the goddamn answers.

Because I just want

the clipping of my wings

to commence

so I can finally take flight

and truly soar

the way God has been

preparing me.