“Essentially mental health lives in our stomach or feels. In our stomach, not just our brain.” - Camila Smith LCSW

How the fear and anxiety of empaths after narcissistic abuse can spark anxiety in us and how we can take care of that is to heal it through our gut health, nutrition, and even mental health practices.

How to relieve anxiety from narcissistic abuse through your gut

Today I share a conversation with Camila Smith of Bekome

Instagram: @joinbekome

Guest Bio : Camila Smith LC. S w is a licensed. . Psychotherapist and anxiety expert with advanced training and mental health. And nutrition, doctorate in health sciences, and chief clinical officer at Bekome. Bekome is a mental wellness company dedicated to providing a safe and all natural approach to alleviating anxiety through supplementation, nutrition, and gut health.

Here are some key moments:

Body alarms us to protect us 

The Narcissist will never let go 

Trauma complicates the signals

How to heal through the gut 

1. one thing in your diet to be healthier
2. Take a supporting supplement such as Bekome 
3. Get outside and move your body, or start a hobby
4.  aromatherapy in your body wash / or diffused through essential oils

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Music YouTube Library: Til I Let Go by Neffex

88. Fear of Empaths Being Alone with Camilla Smith / Relieve anxiety through your Body

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Bekome. Your natural anxiety relief starts today. As Camilla Smith shares on episode

88. Of the podcast. What we consume in our body directly affects our brain and stress. Muscle tension from repressed anxiety, irritability and overwhelm are all side effects of trapped negative emotions in your body. You can get relief and feel your best with their research backed supplements.

And feel a reduction of anxiety within one week of using Bekome. Try it now and get one-on-one expert support that addresses the root of your worry and anxiousness use code empath 30

E M P a T H 30. for 30% off your first full month

at Join bekome . Co. That's join. B E K O M e.co. The link is in the show notes.

disorders or states of being personality traits to relationships, right. Relationships that were either formed early on with our parents or maybe peers or, any form of relationship. And that tends to have a long lasting impact that then continues to impact people's a present day.

. I am your host, Raven Scott, your go-to narcissist abuse recovery coach.

This is episode 88. The fear of impasse being alone and how to relieve anxiety through your body with Camilla Smith

Repeat after me. I am awakened. I am the chain breaker. I am the daughter of the earth.

And empower you.

Follow me on Instagram at ravenscottshow and DME free gift, and I will send you the ever so popular. How does that powerful boundaries with the narcissist free workshop? And start healing yourself and taking back the power in your life today.

It is not a substitute for professional therapy.

We are back and joined with Camilla Thank you for being here, Camilla. I'm so excited to dive into this topic about gut health and nutrition. This won't be airing during Virgo season, but we're gonna be talking about it during Virgo season, which is part of that Zodiac. We love health, so perfect timing.

Thank you. And welcome to the.

, This episode is sponsored by better help. I numbed myself to stop the pain and I reached out to friends for. But it wasn't until I gained courage to leave and seek therapy that my dark abyss of hopelessness finally started to let in the light I was so longing for.

It will give you access to help that you need that may not be available in your area. finding a therapist is easy. You just fill out the questionnaire to help assess your specific needs. And then you get matched with the therapist in under 48 hours. Everything you share is completely confidential in therapy.

I learned that I wasn't the selfish, lesser person. My ex convinced me I was in my therapy. I was able to get affirmation that I was truly being emotionally and sexually abused. That alone allowed me to release my trauma and grow into the strong coach and mentor that I am today, but I didn't just gain that alone in therapy.

I gained my sense of self autonomy back my power back and my confidence back. Join the 3 million plus people who have taken charge of their mental health with an experience better health therapist. Get 10% off your first month@betterhelp.com slash empath. That's better. H E L p.com/e M P a T H in the link in the show notes.

Camila Smith LC. S w is a licensed. . Psychotherapist and anxiety expert with advanced training and mental health. And nutrition, doctorate in health sciences, and chief clinical officer at Bekome. Bekome is a mental wellness company dedicated to providing a safe and all natural approach to alleviating anxiety through supplementation, nutrition, and gut health.

Meaningful. social impact and advocacy.

It flowed very naturally. When I was thinking about, , graduate school, I instantly was like social work. So I got into the program. What I didn't know is that I could become a clinical social worker, which then led me to the path of becoming a therapist. So I had no idea that this was an option for me until I got there.

And the advisor asked me, you know, what do you wanna do? Advocacy clinical education. And that's kind of where my clinical career started. So, , once I graduated, I started well before then in, in the. I worked at different hospitals as case manager. Then when I graduated, I started working with kids, , at a outpatient clinic and continued working with adults, kids kind of a wide spectrum.

And after about five years of being in practice, I felt very. Under prepared in a way, you know, I had the tools, I had the resources, I had the training, but I did not have a good understanding of all of the moving parts and what I mean, I worked at a clinic where we had primary care, OB GYN, kind of. You know, a, a nice comprehensive clinic and we would get referrals from let's say primary care.

Now I'm all for, , you know, medicine. I, I'm not against it by any means, but I did, you know, there are some, , people that rather try alternative and I couldn't find the. That gap in between medical and mental health. So I went back to school, got my doctorate in health sciences, and then decided to focus on the use of natural remedies and anxiety for my research.

, as I was doing that, I had a vision board last year, April,

We'll be back. in just a moment.

Hey, empaths wanted to take a break and ask if these phrases sound familiar to you. I didn't say that you're too sensitive. No one will ever believe you.

If these phrases are. Familiar and you may be dealing with a narcissist

my book empath and the narcissist. Is for you. How to overcome narcissistic abuse and recover from PTSD, codependency, gaslighting, and manipulation. This book, as a guide for you to heal from childhood trauma, with effective exercises. And even a bonus chapter on human design. Also receive another bonus in this book. The free four ways to set powerful boundaries workshop is included in this book. If you wish to feel alive again, take back the power in your life. Then go to www dot Raven, Scott. Dot Show forward slash empath and the narcissist

Now, back to the show.

We have, this idea for a company. And I just think you'd be great. So I was like, okay. So we got on a call and it's Vanessa and she, , said, Hey, we're thinking of starting a Nutri, like a vitamin company for anxiety. And I was like, no way. And I was like, okay, well I have a hundred page document ready to go for you.

We're formulations . And then that took us on a path to where we are now, where we, we formulated and launched, , E multivitamin for anxiety. So it's been a, a path of me kind of following my heart, , a combination of my heart, my. And letting things just unfold and kind of just flowing with whatever, whatever comes.

for medicine and

You swing the other way. It's also too off balance. So

Big rise in people, you know, kind of feeling really alone, depressed, and being afraid to, to establish connections, right? Because of this invisible predator, you know, COVID, that has kind of stood in the middle of us being able to connect. So that, that has been a big piece of it. And as far as relationships, I'd say that at the core, , in mental health, we can typically tie a lot of different, , you.

Disorders or states of being personality traits to relationships, right. Relationships that were either formed early on with our parents or maybe peers or, any form of relationship. And that tends to have a long lasting impact that then continues to impact people's a present day.

When we talk about the subconscious or the conscious mind, that's closely related to how we've stored, , information. So early relationships with our parents, , maybe as an infant or a three, four year old, our, our brain is always storing information memories, right? So it's there. This what we call kind of our unconscious or subconscious.

We are unable to access it unless we're in that brave wave, which is where sometimes, , people might dream of things or when we're asleep, we have access to some of those memories. , but I think again, here's where I love the interplay between science and, a lot of the things that we've known for a long time, we know that we're driven by something, you know, kind of deeper and innate and scientifically it goes down to brainwaves, which is pretty cool.

correlation. I love that you brought that up. , I just read a book about singing bowls and they had gone into the, the, the brain. Of like the different, I loved how they broke it down too. It was like this book about singing bowls, but it was like, this is important to know that this science correlates to the vibrations and

So before we develop the faculties of our, you know, our. Brain we had the, the ENS, right. And that's in our gut. So our gut brain, we're gonna call it our gut brain. Our gut brain actually has the capacity to feel, to send signals, to receive kind of just like our brain. So we have two actual nervous systems.

One, our brain utilizes the CNS, the central nervous system, and our gut utilizes the ENS, which is the enteric nervous system. So what this means, and then there is, , it it's connected by the vagus nerve. , I can get very geeky, but other other systems. Yeah. That goes up and down. Yeah. , HPA access. Our primary emotions, our instinctual responses to fear to sadness are often felt in our stomach, you know, um, kind of even the expression of like, oh, I have this, this. Fear or this feeling in the pit of my stomach, right. Intuition is in our stomach or in our heart. Right. We don't, we might think it, but we more feel it.

So the feeling aspect is connected to our gut more than our brain. Right. We don't feel our brain. Um, we think, right. But we do feel in our stomach, which is kind of backwards. Right. I feel like we tend to think of the brain Controlling everything. But the reality is that our gut is what controls feelings.

Right. It also helps us to digest food. , and another part that's super interesting. Serotonin is our neurotransmitter in charge of mood, sleep, appetite, , and pain. And 90% of it is produced in our stomach. , So only a really small percent is in our brain. So our, our ability to regulate in our ability to have a balanced state where we're sleeping, good, we feel good.

We're balancing, you know, pain, that's all in our stomach. So if we're experiencing a lot of stress and that throws off our, our kind of our gut health, it's gonna throw off our production of our main neurotransmitter. So it's a cycle, right? , essentially mental health lives in our stomach or feels. In our stomach, not just our brain.

Like I love you is a phrase that should not make you cry. Therefore, your body is not trusting that. So I love that. You're, you're talking about that and saying that, that. That is where that intuition lies, which also aligns with what I talk about in human design. Those who have either the solar plexus or the sacral authority, that's it.

That's down in the

solar plexus, right? It's down, it's down below. It's not up here. There's no authority anywhere in the human design that is up above in the brain. It's always down below in

the

Right. So it's like in my gut, I feel this isn't right. But I feel like I want to stay or I feel afraid, but then I can't make sense of the disconnect between my heart and my gut. So now they're all outta whack. There's no alignment. Right. But the truest, , one and the. I would say, honestly, in, when I work with clients, I always go back to, you know, listening to our, our intuition learning and gas lighting, oftentimes impairs our ability to trust our own gut.

Right. , in narcissism or in unhealthy relationships, , because of the, the abusive dynamics. We stop believing in ourselves. We stop kind of like, you know, paying attention to that gut feeling. So again, , that gut, , feeling is really it's in part intuitive. , but intuitive in a very instinctual way, in a way that like, you know, right.

We know through our gut more than we know through our brain sometimes.

I couldn't. On top of that, I was on a super restricted diet. Cause I had to say a, a certain weight for him, but I, , I wasn't able to, I was starting to develop food allergies. Like I wasn't able to eat

I was like, oh, I'm not eating enough. She's like, no, you not eating enough. But then also it was, it was just like, I don't know why. I just thought it was this mystery. Right. Cuz I had been ignoring my gut for so long.

So I'm sure there are people like that in the audience who are experiencing that and they're ignoring their body and their gut.

Not always easy, but we can. but when it comes to pain, it's much more difficult. So physical sensations is, is, , in a way kind of the last resort that our body has to say, hello, can you hear me? Like, are you with me? And that's where we start to experience a lot of pain and also just, , the stress response and just regulation and the body, , causes a lot of gastrointestinal.

So there's actually a big connection between IBS. , Crohn's disease just general, you know, discomfort in our stomach and mental health. , and this is where, you know, it's kind of bringing in another piece, not to get too off topic, but nutrition really comes in like probiotics, right? Which served a purpose of cleansing our gut, but also through the cleansing of our gut, it helps to regulate our neurotransmitters that then positively impact our mental health.

The alarm goes off. Same thing. Our body, when someone is, whether it be a person, , a situation, right, when it's intruding, when it's causing us pain, when it's causing us fear, when it's causing us discomfort in any way, whether it be physical, psychological, emotional, , our alarm system goes off and it doesn't make a sound it only has sensations.

Right? It's the only way. So we're, we're going to feel a physical sensation and that is the same as the alarm going off, it might be our heart racing. It might be a stomach ache. It might be a headache, but it's really more or less the it's an alarm. It's a message that our body's trying to say of, Hey, my home, my body, my whole being does not feel good.

Something is not.

I, I need you. Well, yeah. They need you for the errands. They need you for the money. They need you for the supply. But someone who really truly loves you is not going to put you through so much emotional turmoil.

Where kids only received validation when they did really well at school or where they did really well at sports, they excelled. Right? Well over time, this then becomes a pattern of feeling validated through external recognition. but at the core is this conditional love. So a lot of narcissists, , do not have at times the awareness to start with right.

Of, uh, what unconditional love means, right? Because unconditional love it's like any pet or, uh, parents, right? , we don't love our fur babies or babies, any less wonders. Right when they're like not feeling good and maybe they're throwing up or they're happy, or they're sad. Right? There's still that same level, if not more right.

Of love, connection and care. When, when our loved ones are feeling down, but oftentimes this isn't. So when you know, we're talking about how narcissist give love or show love, , it often comes from a, a very different, , framework of conditional versus unconditional loving.

To the point, right. That they're people pleasing and putting themselves less. So it's a perfect fit. You know, when you have someone that is that perhaps, , views some of your behaviors as selflessness, , because of the way they were raised. Right? So it's like this perfect fit between two individuals into, of course it becomes completely unhealthy.

, but it is like, while it is completely unhealthy, At some point there's some sort of balance at the beginning where it seems to be working until it's not.

you know, a hamburger and fries works for a bit and then it causes some real systemic issues. The, the con, the more you consume it.

Right. So when you wake up and you decide to make a healthy choice, it's when we decide to move our. That's there's no one there to say do it or don't do it. Right. It's self-accountability , so oftentimes it's, uh, yeah, that, that validation is hard to get all the time and if we rely on it, then we would be falling short, , pretty frequently.

It's. If we're pour and pour and pour. And if you don't, as long as you don't stop pouring, the glass will be full. Right. But the moment you stop pouring that it's gonna start to like, okay, gradually go down, down, down. And to eventually it's like, oh my God, I don't have this anymore. Right. So even for individuals with narcissism, , there is at times a deep pain, , because there is, you know, a, a perceived lack of, , attention that is needed.

Um, but it's being, soughted in a really unhealthy.

So having the expectation of a full blossom change, right? Like it's, it's great. I mean, it's one of the most satisfying things as you know, from my end as a clinician. but it's also very satisfying to know that at the core we're planting seeds.

I wanna put you in the real ground. Let's go. Let's keep growing. So, but you can't be impatient. Just like you cannot be impatient with your own emotional growth journey, your healing journey. It's like one little trigger at a time is one little root you can pluck out of the garden or one little seed you plant into the garden, whichever way you wanna look at it.

and, you know, the bigger, our trauma, the bigger our garden, the longer it's gonna take for us to go through and weed, everything out. Right. And sometimes we might be able to do it and some people might be able to do it in what seems like a shorter time. It's not necessarily it's different, you know, depths, , and kind of, , processes that we go through.

So definitely that makes, that makes a lot of sense.

So when we eat things, , that are allergens or toxic, right, they can literally go up to our brain and infiltrate our brain. So I know a lot of people have heard of like leaky gut, you know, it's a bit more common. We also have leaky brain. So we have similarly, , our gut has a aligning around it that over time through eating toxins can start to break down.

Our brain has the same. And if we're not, , feeding our brain in our gut with proper nutrition, then that barrier starts to break and toxin starts to go through. So on this highway, one of the, the things, or one of the organisms that can travel, so probiotics are live organisms, right? So they literally can go.

Up our highway and up to our brain. So they start right. We take 'em yes. Clear mind.

So probiotics is one really great way that we can start to balance out a or gut health. But also start to literally go up into our brain and send, so probiotics are like, let's say our little warrior, , you know, good bacteria. They go in and they cleanse and they eliminate all the ones that shouldn't be there.

And that's because our brain, the lining is, , it's inflamed. So in, , anti-inflammatories like

So it only, it's supposed to only let certain things through like serotonin right. Or certain or transmitters in and out of the, the brain. But sometimes, , toxins get into there and then they start to break, break it up. And it also, our brain isn't able to regulate what comes into our brain. So on a literal level, our brain tissue, , will start to swell and will feel pain.

So we have things like anti-inflammatories, , probiotics are micronutrients, right? So all of our macro and micronutrients are really important. , we can get these through. So magnesium iron, , B6, B12, vitamin C, vitamin E. So all of these are needed for practically everything. , as it relates to mental health, they're actually needed to, to convert, uh, amino acids into neurotransmitter.

So what this means is for example, serotonin, let's call it our mood, right? Our mood, , our mood neurotransmitter serotonin actually starts off as STO. Trip Ahan can only be, uh, consumed through food. So trip Ahan is found in Turkey, cheese, dairy chicken, and, you know, there's, it's fun in a lot, but it's hiring some sources.

And this is where to support a healthy brain. We have to make sure that we're, we're consuming all of the nutrients that are needed to turn, uh, amino acids that we get in our food, into the, you know, the healthy and balanced transmitters.

Then it can't really transfer up to serotonin. It just kind of does it go up as a toxin or

, some nutrients are in our body for a bit longer, so we still have reserves. Right. They get stored. , so we're able to pull from our reserve. And, you know, hopefully be able to still synthesize 'em one way that I utilize actually Thanksgiving is to all right, so we eat the Turkey, right? Lots of Turkey, lots of trip to.

Let's let's just assume that to some degree we have sufficient nutrients maybe from, you know, the Mor maybe in the morning before we got there, we ate an orange or we had a, and relatively, healthy breakfast. So we go from the trip fan, then we go fiveish tea people we go to serotonin. Right.

So we literally see the conversion, right. Go from like Turkey. So happy. So sleepy. And it's this wave. It's hilarious now that you know, I pay attention. You'll see people go from like really talkative and excited. And then after I would say like about like an hour to, after everyone eats, everyone just starts.

Kind of get sleepy or quiet or , and that's like in, you know, we get to see, , live the conversion from serotonin to melatonin

just the abnormal amount of trip.

Like, do you have any little, like, simple little tips on how to

To, , healthy foods and these actually tend to be inner cities. , there are not as many local fresh produce or they're farther away. Um, so it, sometimes it can be hard to actually get these foods or expensive sometimes. Right. So one of the things that are important. So for example, the us, uh, we tend to be pretty deficient in a lot of our, , nutritional, , levels.

Around 68% of Americans are deficient in magnesium. So that is a lot right. Vitamin D , especially when we're spending a lot of time indoors. So one of the, the key things, , so it's kind of a, a multiple prong approach one, right? We want to try to be intentional with making healthy choices. This can be hard to change everything at once.

You know, I like the idea of 1% better a day. what is one thing? Just one thing that I can do. Can I swap just one Coca-Cola with a glass of water? Can I, you know, just little by little, we make these choices, right? So one is intentional eating, , two. at times it is helpful to supplement, right? So whether it be through multivitamins, , and finding, you know, different ways that support our body and then, you know, three, as far as getting like a mental boost or feeling good, doing things that we love.

Right. So exercise, , spending time with friends, family engaging in a hobby. So it's kind of this three prong approach right. Of nutrition, supplementation, and. In some ways, just engaging our mind and stuff that we love. , and for me, this has been a huge area of, of passion for me. , and this is exactly where, you know, so I talked about earlier how last year I had manifested that I really wanted to have this nutraceutical company.

I'm happy to offer the support that I. But we need more, right. We need, we need more outlets. We need more support. , and this is where not, you know, super excited to have taken. So with my partners, , we developed, , it's actually a little pill pack, so it comes with five different ingredients in it I was part of the team.

That formulated them. So each of these ingredients are like perfectly blended based on research to not only provide those nutrients, but work with each other. , and you know, so looking at alternatives, such as, , supplements that are specific, it can be overwhelming. There's so many supplements. I went to CVS the other day.

It feels like the supplement, I just gets longer. It was on both sides. It used to be on like one side. It was one side. And then the O and, and I love supplements. This is what I do every day, but I was overwhelmed and I was like, how do I, like, I granted I have a doctorate in this. And even I was like, How do I choose?

This is a lot. So we really tried to take the guesswork out I take it every day. I love it. , I feel really good. , in addition to vitamins, we also wanna look at, , things that support the central nervous system.

Right? So herbs botanicals, , so in the blend we've included magnesium B6, that probiotic, or we. The healthy bacteria. , we also have ltionine which is an amino acid that induces relaxation focus, and we have passion flour. , it has been extensively studied and found to have the, , similar efficacy as, , antidepressants or medication for anxiety.

So we don't have to stop what we're doing. You can take your multivitamin, you can take your medication, it's gonna work independently or with whatever. , we might already be.

Absolutely. All the basics we know, but I think carving out time is really what needs to happen in order for it to get done.

So while I was going down the volcano on a bike, we went through and around the forest and the smell of eucalyptus, just like, and it was breezy. It smelled good. So every time I scrubbed my face, I'm like, I am in Maui. This is great. I feel good. Right. So we can choose to do things like take in a shower.

Right. But let's enjoy it. Let's add in a soap that smells good. A face scrub, a lotion, you know, taking any activity that we already do and enhancing it by bringing joy and.

information. We'll have all the links down in the show, note to your supplement and all of that.

you. Thank you so much for allowing the space.

Don't forget to follow me

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If you wish to break through the subconscious blocks. Docs that are energetically keeping you from. Love and relationships. Ships healthy partners and abundance. Visit www.madhvi.ca that's M a D HVI dot C. A And the link will be in the show notes.

Ships clear out old and toxic ones. Or just look through clear eyes. I do also offer coaching sessions for you specifically on recovering and healing from narcissistic abuse. I'm taking one on one coaching clients. . So contact me through the link in the show notes to grab your coaching sessions today. .