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Hugging limiting beliefs, with Lena Nasiakou
Episode 629th May 2022 • I'm Back! • Serena Savini
00:00:00 00:22:41

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Is it possible to accept our limiting beliefs? Hug them and thank them?

Lena Nasiaskou is an Embodied Coach, Trainer and Facilitator, and she will guide us in a powerful meditation on limiting beliefs, we will discuss the impostor syndrome, the importance of the body and pratical tools to feel grounded.

You can find Lena here:

Transcripts

Lena:

I think when we experienced situations or yeah, circumstances

Lena:

that they throw us out of our regular normal way of doing things, then I

Lena:

think these limiting beliefs are really kicking in a massively, unfortunately.

Lena:

So, yeah.

Lena:

And what can we do

Serena:

Today I'm really happy to have here Lena Nasiakou embodied

Serena:

coach with lot of experiencing using the body as a transformation tool.

Serena:

We are going to discuss the importance of fighting, limiting beliefs.

Serena:

The use of meditation in doing so, and Lena is going to share practical

Serena:

examples to fight limiting beliefs.

Serena:

Thank you so much, Lena, for being here with us.

Lena:

Thank you very much for having me here.

Lena:

It's it's lovely to work together and also to really take a moment.

Lena:

Let's take a moment to discuss a, that, what do you have planned to discuss and

Lena:

yeah, bring some light into the topics.

Lena:

The, the focus, when you first asked me about being part of your

Lena:

podcast, I immediately connected with it, with the topic of thing back.

Lena:

And for me being black means paying back to myself, being back

Lena:

to the moments that I feel good.

Lena:

I do things well.

Lena:

I feel good in my skin because there are so many moments I think, in our lives.

Lena:

He has people that they are on maternity leave, let's say for a couple of months.

Lena:

And then they have to go back to work or people who are, who face

Lena:

the trauma or people who were in hospital had an accident, or even

Lena:

people who were in a different role.

Lena:

They were a team player, a team, a part of a team.

Lena:

And then they became a team later and all of a sudden, it's, it's a very

Lena:

new thing and it takes a couple of.

Lena:

Months, maybe it takes time to test and come to the point that

Lena:

you feel, oh, now I'm back.

Lena:

I'm really back.

Lena:

So that's why I'm very happy to be here.

Serena:

Thank you, Lena and do you think we have the luxury of time?

Lena:

No, actually now that you're asking, I think most of the times we don't

Lena:

and that's counter productive because when we don't feel that we are working

Lena:

or being at our best and we have to perform, you have to do it's even more.

Lena:

It adds even more pressure.

Serena:

Yeah, I have same feeling and, and this is why for me, it's a gift

Serena:

to have you here because you are doing something really special for us today.

Serena:

Do you want to explain what you are going to propose to our listeners today?

Lena:

Yes.

Lena:

Oh, you make me smile.

Lena:

Let me say that the it's a gift and Yeah.

Lena:

It's I was thinking that we can work with the topic of limiting beliefs and

Lena:

imposter syndrome, because I think, I didn't know, but many, many people are

Lena:

suffering from limiting beliefs, from beliefs that they hold about themselves

Lena:

and they are really holding them back.

Lena:

And that.

Lena:

It's a topic that I would like to share with people so they can

Lena:

really, they can really see that it's something that it is happening.

Lena:

It's not only me or you, but it's like, it can happen to everyone.

Lena:

And actually what's, what's interesting is that recently I read an interview from Tom

Lena:

Hanks, the well-known actor, and then he says, and I have a cure so I can read it.

Lena:

When are they going to discover that I am in fact, a fraud and

Lena:

take everything away from me?

Lena:

I mean, we all know.

Lena:

And he's so well-recognized and he is a war awarded actor.

Lena:

It's so interesting and it's not only him.

Lena:

It the imposter syndrome, a syndrome, which is a, in few words, explained

Lena:

it's a syndrome that we believe that what we have achieved is not because

Lena:

we deserved it, but because it's because of luck and people are going

Lena:

to discover they can away from us.

Lena:

So it's something that it doesn't discriminate, age, sex,

Lena:

gender the years of experience.

Lena:

Nothing it it happens.

Lena:

It can happen to everyone.

Lena:

So, I think when we experienced situations or yeah, circumstances

Lena:

that they throw us out of our regular normal way of doing things, then I

Lena:

think these limiting beliefs are really kicking in a massively, unfortunately.

Lena:

So, yeah.

Lena:

And what can we do

Lena:

mean I don't have a magic wand, but maybe we can start with what

Lena:

is not good to do, because what happens if we have a limiting belief?

Lena:

Let's let me tell you one of my limiting beliefs.

Lena:

So.

Lena:

A year and a year ago, a year and a half ago, I made the transit from the nonprofit

Lena:

sector profits of the corporate work.

Lena:

And.

Lena:

It was so intense.

Lena:

And so they figured out that I was questioning myself on a daily basis,

Lena:

feeling that I'm not a good fit for corporate, but I'm not good enough

Lena:

that maybe I should stop doing all the embedded learning things that I'm doing

Lena:

can just be normal, regular trainer.

Lena:

So what was going on is that I had this beliefs, let's say

Lena:

I'm not a good fit for COVID.

Lena:

Uh, I just wanted to post them away.

Lena:

I wanted it.

Lena:

I don't have this believe anymore.

Lena:

I was like, yeah, if this is a struggle, I want, I wanted to put the side.

Lena:

So this is one thing that we usually do.

Lena:

And out like just a small thing to try now with uh people who listen

Lena:

to us and also with you before we go to the main exercise just to embody.

Lena:

And so with your tests, If you, if you can bring in your mind

Lena:

now, your negative belief, how, what do you want to do with it?

Lena:

What do you want to do with it and bring it in your mind and just put the

Lena:

gesture in it, what you want to do with

Serena:

it.

Lena:

Yeah.

Lena:

What are you doing with?

Lena:

Yeah,

Serena:

I was trying to create a ball to transform.

Serena:

Like it's not longer a weapon that is hurting me, but it's

Serena:

like our win that I can enjoy.

Serena:

So I was trying to transform it in something different.

Serena:

And you did something really powerful

Lena:

I was pushing it away because I don't want to see it.

Lena:

Like it's like I sit in front of me, but I don't want to say it.

Lena:

It triggers.

Lena:

And most of people have this idea.

Lena:

They want to transform it.

Lena:

They will not put it in their back.

Lena:

They will not put it aside.

Lena:

They don't want it as it looks like right now.

Lena:

And this is very normal, but what it takes, if we want to work with

Lena:

our limiting beliefs is to accept.

Lena:

Now easier said than done.

Lena:

I know that it's very easy to say.

Lena:

Yeah, yeah.

Lena:

Just accepted, but it doesn't happen.

Lena:

So what we can do is one of the things that we can do is have like an embedded

Lena:

process that can help us acknowledge say accepted and slowly let go.

Lena:

And that was the plan for this for this book.

Lena:

Cause if we can work together.

Lena:

Online and everybody who is listening to that right now, plus who maybe doesn't

Lena:

have a privilege in working with the core.

Lena:

Try out this exercise.

Lena:

So for the ones for listening to us right now, you only need to be in

Lena:

a place that you feel comfortable, that there are no people around

Lena:

you and you can keep sending.

Lena:

So they can moment with a press pose now, so you can find this

Lena:

place for yourself and then we can

Serena:

start.

Lena:

Okay.

Lena:

We can start and that if you're seated, please stand up and we are simply

Lena:

going to ground ourselves first.

Lena:

So what's your feet fill your feet against the floor.

Lena:

Relax your shoulders.

Lena:

Take a slow breath, breathing slowly and

Serena:

breathe,

Lena:

and you can keep your case load.

Lena:

Or you can close your eyes, close your

Serena:

eyes.

Lena:

They can either slow breath

Serena:

and let it out

Lena:

and blink in your mind now and topic that you want to

Lena:

play or limiting beliefs around.

Lena:

At topic that keeps you basically play and you want to work out right now

Lena:

and now simply observe quits out of the limiting beliefs

Lena:

that are connected with this.

Lena:

Simply observe them without any

Serena:

attachment.

Serena:

And now they

Lena:

can moment to place these limiting beliefs.

Lena:

In front of you as if you were watching them in front of a screen,

Lena:

maybe they're too, maybe are three, simply observe them in front of you as

Lena:

if you were reading them on a screen.

Serena:

And now they can moment

Lena:

block.

Lena:

No, let's this believes for how they protected you.

Lena:

They can moment to see how these beliefs have been serving you.

Lena:

And now imagine that this believes that they are in the screen,

Lena:

they're coming closer to your chest.

Lena:

They're coming closer to your heart.

Lena:

And when you feel ready, open your arms and hug them while you're giving

Lena:

yourself a big warm and senators hug

Serena:

and when you

Lena:

open your hands and let them

Serena:

go

Serena:

and take a deep breath.

Lena:

Take another deep breath and exhale, Sarah,

Lena:

lift up your face, relax your shoulders.

Lena:

Feel your feet against the ground.

Lena:

And when you are ready, you can open your

Serena:

eyes.

Serena:

Oh, thank you.

Serena:

I was not ready to be brave.

Serena:

Oh, it was really powerful.

Serena:

And I didn't expect that.

Serena:

Normally in the coaching session, what are you going to do after this exercise?

Lena:

There's usually a conversation.

Lena:

So after the exercise, I give her a couple of minutes in silence.

Lena:

So the call take and really take it clean.

Lena:

And then it's a discussion where the coaches can share what happened

Lena:

in the visualization, how they see,

Serena:

and what if we are alone doing that maybe because

Serena:

we are listening to this.

Serena:

What can we do after the visualization

Lena:

with ? If you take a moment for yourself and a moment can

Lena:

be five minutes can be one.

Lena:

Let's take a moment to really take everything in , can

Lena:

be that you wanna stay in.

Lena:

Silence can be that you want to throw and express yourself in drawing can

Lena:

be that you want to write down the clothes can also be that you're going

Lena:

to save them with somebody that is really close to you or go for a walk.

Lena:

Probably say ways of handling our own emotions are already yeah.

Lena:

Valid.

Serena:

Do you think it's something that you need to do multiple times?

Lena:

Multiple times.

Lena:

Yeah.

Lena:

And what is interesting is that we will never get read, or we'll

Lena:

never be like without any limiting beliefs, but would be great.

Lena:

We would do one exercise and then it's done.

Lena:

But if we keep doing this exercise or other exercises, we can, we can have

Lena:

another exercise on power pose and later if you want, it really helped.

Lena:

I do know that, oh, when these limiting beliefs kick in, when these feelings

Lena:

and thoughts of I am an imposter comes, I have a tool that I can use.

Lena:

I have a technique that I can put in practice, so I don't feel helpless

Lena:

or I don't feel the overwhelm in the, the extent that I used to feel.

Lena:

And slowly, slowly, They fade away, but unfortunately other

Lena:

ones will come in the foreground.

Lena:

It's, it's a lifelong, it's a lifelong learning.

Lena:

It's a lifelong story.

Lena:

So every time we can have something to work with them, that's the

Serena:

yes.

Serena:

And do you want to share anything else to our listeners?

Lena:

Yes.

Lena:

Actually I would like to walk you through the exercise and explain

Lena:

why we did these different stages in the exercise and what helps.

Lena:

Y Y hell what helps what?

Lena:

So we started with grounding, putting ourselves and feeling that

Lena:

the ground and closing our eyes.

Lena:

And this is really great.

Lena:

When if you observe yourself, when you have these limiting beliefs, mostly

Lena:

we don't have our feet on the ground.

Lena:

Either we are crossed leg or we are not really connected with.

Lena:

So it really, really helps if we get connected first, if we

Lena:

really start from another level, we start from the ground level.

Lena:

So that's, that's the ground thing part then you visualize the topic

Lena:

and the next part was observation.

Lena:

So I ask you to simply observe the limiting beliefs in front of you and

Lena:

try to see them like in a screen.

Lena:

We held Jasmine now resay that the thought of visualization is huge.

Lena:

And I think it's true because we read to the visualization, the unconscious

Lena:

brain and our minds, our brain doesn't know that this is like mental health.

Lena:

It thinks that this is the case.

Lena:

So it helps us to disconnect the attachment from the belief itself.

Lena:

So if I'm thinking I'm not good enough, and I have a judgment that this isn't

Lena:

like a really bad thing to think about.

Lena:

If I try to disconnect the attachments as sick as a thought,

Lena:

it's a thought I'm not good enough.

Lena:

Then it passes by.

Lena:

He told her they reframes the whole belief.

Lena:

So that's the reason that we took, there was a fake.

Lena:

The next part is about acknowledgement.

Lena:

Now what's interesting is that most people aren't aware that these beliefs

Lena:

are there to protect us the surface.

Lena:

Maybe not now rhythm to create them right now, because now they're unsufficient,

Lena:

but we played them at the moment that they were there to protect us.

Lena:

And I'll illustrate this with an example.

Lena:

Like uh, if this baby elephants and when they are really small, they put them at

Lena:

there's a pole and they tied their legs in the pole with a rope and the elephant

Lena:

tries to escape and it cannot escape.

Lena:

So it's in pain and everything.

Lena:

So it learns to stay close to the road because it knows that if it

Lena:

goes away, It will be in pain.

Lena:

And what's interesting is that the elephant grows and becomes a huge pig

Lena:

elephant, which weights tones, which can easily destroy the pole and run away.

Lena:

But they don't do it because they are, they believe their belief that if they

Lena:

go, if they try to escape from the pole, the pole will give them guidance.

Lena:

It will be very painful.

Lena:

So you see how things work?

Serena:

Yes.

Serena:

We need to do this visualization with the elephants.

Lena:

That's a good one

Lena:

is to make them free to make us free, but to make us free.

Lena:

How has this been serving us?

Lena:

So it has been serving the little elephant because it helped him not to have pain.

Lena:

It avoided the pain and it served us in the past because of X and Y reasons.

Lena:

So first before we let go, anything, we need to accept.

Lena:

And then we have the acceptance part, which is really to take everything in

Lena:

and have this Dell, both superpower for hug, to hug the beliefs and hug ourselves

Lena:

because we tend to be super harsh on ourselves for we have this belief.

Lena:

So January was and super genuine, big warm hug to ourselves.

Lena:

It really helps to really feel an embody, how it is to accept these

Lena:

beliefs, to acknowledge them and yeah.

Lena:

To, to really accept them and have them close to us.

Lena:

And then the last part, the letting go.

Lena:

With a test here that we get open our hands and we can release

Lena:

it and they can, they can go.

Lena:

It's not that we are pushing them away is that they can go, they can

Lena:

go because we have accepted them.

Lena:

So that's, that's the whole idea of the exercise.

Lena:

The three, three thumb thing, observation acknowledgement, acceptance, and let it

Serena:

go.

Serena:

So I have a question Did maybe can sound like a provocative one, but it's not.

Serena:

Why do you think we forget that we have a body when we are working?

Lena:

Oh, that's a good, I think, you know what, you know, I'm giving

Lena:

three new courses and one of the things that I'm saying usually

Lena:

in the beginning is that with.

Lena:

From the neck up is everything.

Lena:

Everything happens from the neck up.

Lena:

And then our is a brain taxi and it's not, we get so much disconnected

Lena:

with our bodies because it's not valued in their societies.

Lena:

We are living in.

Lena:

And it's so not true.

Lena:

It's so not true.

Lena:

Our but is really it's keeps the score.

Lena:

There's a very nice book that they really love.

Lena:

It's called the body, keeps the score and clearly does everything happens

Lena:

in a very physical level and at the same time in the brain level and

Lena:

according to ontological coaching which tackles the way of being, we are in

Lena:

the world in three different ways.

Lena:

One with our body, second one without fault.

Lena:

And the third one with the moods that we live in.

Lena:

So the emotions in the moves, and then the logical approach says that

Lena:

these two ways of these three ways of thinking are he can imagine them as three

Lena:

circles, that they are interconnected.

Lena:

And there is so these are three circles that they influence each other.

Lena:

And we usually, unfortunately.

Lena:

We usually try to go only on a health level on what we are telling to ourselves

Lena:

for what we are telling to others.

Lena:

But if we try to incorporate a bit of the international layer and the

Lena:

Bradley layer, we can see a lot of results just because it's so unknown.

Lena:

It's unknown because we are so used to, we live in our body that we don't observe it.

Lena:

It's like a fish is living in the water.

Lena:

And when does the face know that it's not in the water anymore when you take it out?

Lena:

So it's the same for us when we start observing our bodies and acknowledging

Lena:

it in three, makes a very big difference.

Lena:

It's like our face is outside and observing and understanding

Lena:

that it's not in the water then.

Serena:

I think we need to do a lot of things on this.

Serena:

And do you have any advise on, be more aware of our body when we are

Lena:

working?

Lena:

Yeah, that's certainly simple taking like the one we did in the beginning with the

Lena:

brown thing helps every time we fail.

Lena:

There are a lot of thoughts coming into us to put ourselves on the

Lena:

ground and take a deep breath, full the belly with the air and exhale.

Lena:

That's something that people want to see that people that you are in the meeting

Lena:

with or anything, but they will certainly feel the difference in, in our presence

Lena:

so that that can make a big difference.

Serena:

Thank you.

Serena:

Thank you so much, Linda, for this beautiful experience.

Serena:

Thank you for being with us.

Lena:

Thank you.

Lena:

It has been really lovely.

Serena:

Thank you so much for listening to this episode.

Serena:

I hope you will use this meditation in your daily life.

Serena:

Please share it with friends.

Serena:

You can find all the information in the description and also on their website.

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