Ever hit a big goal and wonder why it didn’t feel as good as you expected?

In episode #1200, “Why Success Feels Empty,” we unpack the surprising gap between achievement and fulfillment.

We explore five real reasons success can leave you feeling flat, and the trap of chasing bigger goals to fix the feeling. Along with that five practical strategies to help you feel fulfilled again.

Thanks for listening!

Here’s to your BIGG Success,

George & Mary-Lynn

BIGG Takeaways:

• Success and fulfillment are not the same; achieving a goal doesn't guarantee lasting happiness.
• The Arrival Fallacy is the belief that reaching a goal will bring lasting joy, but fulfillment comes from a way of living.
• Five reasons you might feel empty after achieving a goal include losing your sense of purpose and achieving goals that aren't truly yours.
• To feel fulfilled again, redefine success beyond just goals; consider personal growth and relationships as part of your journey.
• Fall in love with the process of achieving goals rather than fixating solely on the end result for greater joy.
• Creating a life map can help connect your values and goals, making each achievement more meaningful and aligned with your true self.

BIGG Chapters:

• 00:16 - Achieving Success: Setting and Reaching Your Goals
• 01:08 - The Illusion of Success and Fulfillment
• 01:57 - Understanding the Arrival Fallacy
• 05:21 - Redefining Success and Finding Fulfillment
• 07:01 - Building a Life Map for Fulfillment
• 08:43 - Aligning Your Goals for Success

Links referenced in this episode:

Life Map Course

BIGG Success

Arrival Fallacy reference

On this episode of The BIGG Success show, Five Ways to Achieve Success and Fulfillment.

BIGG Success with The Professor and Mary-Lynn.

You set the goal. [Ta-daaa-da-daaa!] You worked hard to achieve it. [Oompa loompa oompa loompa!] Over time, you reach the goal. [Ta-daaah!]

But instead of feeling amazing, you feel flat, unemotional, confused, and maybe even a little bit scared.

[Wah-wah-waaaaaah!] I had to add a sound effect into the sound effect factory you've got going on over there.

I appreciate that, Mary-Lynn.

Thank you.

Well, you wonder why. Why aren't you more excited? This was supposed to make you happy, but happiness seems fleeting. Don't feel alone. This is normal.

Even better, it's fixable.

Welcome to The BIGG Success Show, where we help you create the life you want. Hi, I'm Mary-Lynn.

And I'm George, the Professor

With multiple talents. I mean, all the sounds and...

Well, I wouldn't go so far as to say,

To illuminate that story. It was just so wonderful. Well, in this episode, we're going to explore: Why success isn't the same as fulfillment.

Five reasons you feel empty after reaching a goal. The trap that most people fall into. The shift that changes everything. And five practical moves to feel fulfilled again. Now, success. - George, this is something that your story really brought to light -

That success isn't the same as fulfillment. But we think it is.

We do. And in fact, we say to ourselves over and over again, once I achieve [blank], I'll be happy.

Right. Once I achieve this weight loss goal, once I get this diploma, or once I get this job promotion.

Yes. The next goal is the path to our full prosperity and fulfillment.

Right. Everything's going to be rosy.

Yeah. And that belief, this belief we're discussing right now is called the Arrival Fallacy. The Arrival Fallacy.

It's the idea that reaching a goal is going to bring lasting happiness. But in real life, goals give you a moment of success. Fulfillment comes from a way of living. That's why the feeling fades so fast.

Wow, that's very insightful, Professor. So to understand what causes this feeling, let's look at five reasons why you feel empty after goal attainment. Number one, the chase is over.

Yeah. Your brain loves progress. So while you're chasing a goal, you're fueled by that little chemical that floats around in our brain called dopamine.

It's the motivation chemical, and it's in full charge as you're chasing your goal. But when you reach the goal, the fuel drops. We get that little empty bell, right? You're bordering on empty. So you don't feel excited, you feel done.

We're talking about five reasons you feel empty after goal achievement. Number two is that you get used to it fast.

Yeah, you do. This is called the hedonic treadmill, and here's what it means. It's that you quickly adjust to your new successes.

What felt amazing yesterday feels normal today.

If you want to dive more into the hedonic treadmill and how that works against us, we've got a link to an article about that with your show notes today. The third reason you feel empty after goal attainment, you lost your sense of purpose.

Yeah. Before the goal, you had a target, a plan, and a reason to push onward and upward. After the goal, the structure disappears.

Now you're asking, what's next? What's next? What's next?

That's so human of us, isn't it? And the fourth reason that you feel empty after goal attainment: You achieved, but you want aligned. Sometimes the goal wasn't really yours.

Yeah, it came from expectations, pressure, comparisons. So even though you won, sometimes it just doesn't feel meaningful.

And the fifth reason you feel empty after goal attainment, you thought success would fix everything.

A lot of goals carry hidden beliefs. Well, then I'll be worthy. If I achieve this goal, I'll be worthy, Then I'll feel secure, Then I'll be enough.

But success doesn't fix internal problems. The internal problems...it reveals them.

Oh, boy. And that's where BIGG goal-getters need to be careful, because there's a dangerous trap and it's this. You feel empty. So what do you do?

You set a bigger goal!

Yeah. More money, a bigger win, higher status. And guess what? You end up with the same feeling at a different level. That's the cycle.

But fortunately, there is a remedy for this arrival fallacy. And it's the shift that changes everything.

Yeah. Instead of asking, what should I achieve next? Ask what kind of life am I building? That one question separates chasing success from living success.

Well, and what you just said there, George, really reinforces what you said earlier in the podcast, that goals give us a moment of success, while fulfillment comes from a way of living.

And it's long term success.

So let's talk about five practical moves to feel fulfilled again. Number one, redefine what success means.

If success is defined only by the goals you set, then you'll always feel empty between them. Build a better definition. Think about personal growth, meaning relationships or contribution. Now, success isn't just a finish line, it's a lifestyle.

The second way to feel fulfilled again Is to design goals that fit you.

Before your next goal, ask do I really want this? Do I actually really want this or do I just think I should want it?

Ah, yes, yes. My parents want me to do this, so maybe I should do it. Or my friends think this would be great for me, so I should do it. It's a huge difference.

Yeah. And the thing we learn is if it's not aligned, it won't fulfill you. You gotta have alignment.

Five practical moves to feel fulfilled again. Number three is fall in love with the process.

We hear this time and time again, but do we really take it to heart? Stop saying I'll be happy when [blank]. I'm gonna tell you something that blank is a four letter word!

So start asking how, how can I enjoy this while I'm doing it? Because most of your life happens on the way to your destination, not at your destination.

That's right.

Which brings us to our next point.

Number four. Always have a next chapter.

Yeah. High performers, plan for the letdown before you hit your goal. Decide what's my next growth edge? Where do I want to stretch next?

That keeps your momentum and meaning alive.

Five practical moves to feel fulfilled again. Number five is build a Life Map, not just goals. Now this is the game changer.

Because most people set random goals and they chase them hard, but they feel, as we've been talking about, empty afterwards.

Yeah. A Life Map connects everything. Your values, your direction, your goals, your vision, your mission. So each achievement actually means something.

That's where our Life Map System becomes powerful. Because it's not just another goal tool. You can think of it as a life design system.

Learn more at LifeMapCourse.com. Now let's turn these insights from today's episode into action and get The Professor's BIGG Assignment.

And this assignment is a three step goal realignment.

Step one, look back.

Think of a goal you achieved recently and ask, what did I expect to feel and what did I actually feel?

Step two, find the missing piece.

Was it meaning? Alignment? Purpose? Growth? Be honest with yourself.

Step three, redesign your next goal.

Before you chase it, Define why it matters to you, how it fits in your life, and who you'll become along the way.

Now that brings us to today's BIGG Takeaway.

That empty feeling. It's not failure, it's direction. It's direction that's telling you you've learned how to achieve. Now it's time to learn how to live.

And when you combine those two, it leads to BIGG success.

Speaking of achievements, you know it's graduation season and whether you're walking across a stage or stepping into a pivotal moment in your career, there's a hidden expectation that shows up during times like these.

Next time, we're going to break it down so you can move forward feeling aligned (and continue with our alignment theme here) instead of reacting to pressure.

And let's get connected on social media. We're @BIGGsuccess. That's BIGG with two Gs.

Yes everywhere from YouTube to Instagram. And your next chapter deserves intentional thinking. Stay connected with us by joining our newsletter at BIGGsuccess.com/join.

And we thank you so much for listening today. Until next time,

Here's to your BIGG success!

Find BIGG Success at BIGGsuccess.com.