Heartbreak.. 

Did you truly heal from your heartbreak or 

are you still running around with an open wound and 

can’t make sense of:

Why life isn’t flowing nicely ?

Why do I keep feeling disappointed ?

Why do people in the dating world suck so much ?

No matter when your heart was broken or bruised

healing is necessary because the conclusions you make about yourself after a heartbreak are usually wrong..

You keep not being aware of your insecurities, trust issues, jealousy, self doubt

let's dig into this topic together

Enjoy the first heartbreak episode here to help you 

make sense of things/ situations / behavior and reconnect to your heart 

With love, 

Aurora

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really get to know yourself and find out what steps you can take to untangle

yourself from a situation you don’t wish to be in. I invite you to get to know yourself better in order for you to make the right choices for yourself in the future.

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Free yourself from the ongoing destructive inner chatter become the strongest most authentic version of yourself.

Let’s dive in and find out more about this juicy topic that will most likely affect you in one way or another. 

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Unknown: 00:00:00

Hello, and welcome to the Borealis experience. I'm

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your host Aurora, and I'm very happy to be spending some time

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with you today. Today's episode,

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heart break.

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Have you truly healed from your heartbreak? Yesterday, I was

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sitting in my truck, trying to figure something out with my

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phone.

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And from afar I saw our little neighbor's girl walking towards

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me and I just waved to her through the window and she waved

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and I look back down onto my phone. And then a couple of

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seconds later, my door swings open. And I love a girl shouts

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at me. Hello, how

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have you been?

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And in that moment, I just thought, wow, like I was clearly

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communicating with my body that I was being friendly but

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distant, not wanting to really connect. And that slow girl just

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made her way through my invisible boundary, swung my

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door open and just totally surprised me. Now this little

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girl is approximately 10 years old, 11 years old and glowing

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eyes and so friendly, like running around with an open

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heart at all times. And after we had like a 15 minute chat. I

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left driving off and I thought to myself wow this girl hasn't

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been through a heartbreak yet. This girl hasn't been through

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really tough situations yet. And now you can say yeah, there's

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some girls who go through that and still have that pretty smile

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on but with this girl I I know that she's never been through

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massive pain. And it really made me think on how she approached

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me how open hearted she was and friendly and wanting to connect.

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And it reminded me of myself when I was at age. And yeah, a

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couple of heartbreaks later, I noticed that I love people. I

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love connecting. But at times I still have these walls around my

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heart. My heart can be very open and joyous and light. But

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there's times when I know my heart is totally clogged up with

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regret, resentment, fear. And it takes

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a lot of

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being aware running a walk or sorry, running around mindful

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and listening to my thoughts and feelings to then open up my

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heart again. Today's episode is not only for people who recently

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got heartbroken, got the heartbroken got dumped. It's to

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all the people out there who ever been through a heartbreak

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to check in with themselves and find out. Am I maybe still

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clinging on to pain from a decade ago or 20 years ago? Am I

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fully open and available and friendly and kind and hopeful?

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feel less courageous or am I still in subtle ways? clinging

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to that pain. That pain from back then that totally shaped my

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mind about what love is all about and the consequences I

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suffered and the cook fusions I've made ever since. So, I

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think I want to call it an inventory check of the heart.

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And it really doesn't matter if you're married and have kids,

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and feel like, yeah, everything is perfect. It doesn't hurt to

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go back and check in with yourself, Am I living being my

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best self? Am I trustworthy? Am I trusting others fully? You

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see, the thing with heartbreak is that we make it all about

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ourselves.

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We

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go into birds perspective and try to find out what did we do

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wrong?

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Did we not listen enough? Did we not perform good enough and bad?

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Did we not get along good enough with the parents and law or the

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siblings or the friends? And it all doesn't matter? No. It's,

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it's done. Now, you know, you can reflect about these things.

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You can be aware of certain behavior. But I think you had

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your reasons to. Like, I think we tend to put ourselves into a

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victim position, or maybe even a perpetrator position and can

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really find peace. I've gone through many, many heartbreaks,

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and the biggest I want to say was in 2014, I had moved to a

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different country to be with my boyfriend at that time. And

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after a couple months, it was just fights and very nasty

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between us. So I had to pack my things and move away. And it

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took me years and years and years to heal from that pain.

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Which doesn't mean that for you now it's gonna take years and

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years and years. But what I invite you to do right now is to

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focus in on yourself and to re totally honest with yourself on

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how authentic you showed up in that relationship. Maybe you

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broad past pain, pain from your childhood, into that

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relationship, and you were not able to communicate clearly feel

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good about who you are. Feel confident about who you are,

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maybe you're still struggling was so many insecurities. And it

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was burden the relationship. I really don't know what it was

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that made her or him run away or made you guys broke break up.

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When you look at your childhood, what are the examples of love

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that you observed and experienced? In my instance, I

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can say they were very well functioning on a societal level.

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They were well functioning when it comes to financial needs. And

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I always had shelter and clean clothing and also food to eat.

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But on an emotional level. They didn't understand each other,

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they were too different. My dad is someone who loves heated

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discussions and loves to have kind of that friction with his

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partner. And my mom was always more scared and avoidant of that

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behavior and couldn't clearly communicate her boundaries. And

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it was just on an emotional level. It was a huge mess. Which

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doesn't mean that I'm ungrateful. I have deep respect

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for both of my parents. But when you being like very harshly

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honest with yourself, what did you how Did you experience love?

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How did you define a healthy relationships? And really

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relationship? When you look at your chart? Is there things that

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you carry around as a train as it's sadness? is an anger,

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resentment that you might have brought into your last

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relationship here? Do you distrust your partners, because

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maybe someone in the past has cheated on you or your parents

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cheated on each other.

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So no matter what it is, no matter what your luggage is,

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when you look back, you have to now focus on liberating yourself

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from that. Because if you want to live a fulfilled and content

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life with yourself, this is the work you have to do for

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yourself. And it is only then that you will attract a person

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into your life that is really meant to be with you. You know,

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when I saw that little girl yesterday, I just said My

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goodness, like she's not wearing any masks. She's totally

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herself. She thinks she's the beautifulest girl that there is,

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and she truly is because that's what she's radiating. And she's

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just very light and smart and awesome to be around. Can we get

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back to that self? I'm 120% sure we can. We just have to help

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ourselves to on dig ourselves, again, from all the mess from

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all the masks that we feel we have to wear. Because we're

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still not in full acceptance of ourselves. We might have been

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bullied at school back then, we might have had experiences where

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we felt deep shame and rejection towards ourselves. But if you

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carry this into our loving, romantic relationship, it will

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show at some point you will either be super jealous, super

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insecure, or super guarded. And people who are trying to be with

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you will not be able to reach you. And the painful thing is

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that sometimes they don't communicate that sometimes they

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just react to your guard and reject you. Even though you want

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to be close or annoy you with painful questions, because they

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want to be close and then you reject them. It's a whole mess

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when you're trying to be in a relationship with somebody, and

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you're still wound that you will be bleeding all over that person

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and your relationship. And all this without your awareness. So

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this is why I feel so many people wake up one day and are

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being left alone or being divorced. Because for them, it's

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out of the blue. It is they can't make sense of the

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separation, it was all normal. And then from one day to the

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other, she packed her things and left. You were not aware of the

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red flags of the little things that accumulated over time.

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Because maybe you have a huge blind spot from back then that

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you carried into your relationships. And the person

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that is leaving you is just doing what is best for her or

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himself. It has nothing to do with your worth. It has nothing

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to do with you not being lovable. You are so endlessly

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lovable and you are so worth it, to get to know yourself again,

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and to be completely raw and honest with yourself again. It

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is only then that we can live at peace with ourselves it is then

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we can sometimes make sense of why a relationship broke up. It

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is now by blaming the other person, and by blaming an entire

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gender, and by going out now still wounded and trying to date

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and getting more and more disappointed in the end,

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it is all about going within and seeing what still needs to be

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healed. What is it at the beginning of you guys

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relationship that you were so successfully hiding from that

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person that over the years came out bit by bit, and then they

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didn't like what they were seeing. Because you were putting

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on a show, you were not being authentic. So the person doesn't

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really know who you are, and the end. And sometimes when it comes

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to jealousy and depression, insecurities in general, we very

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successfully hide this from our partners at the beginning. And

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we think that in putting a lid on and suppressing it and

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pushing it away, it will go away. But those things want to

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be addressed deeply and have to be spoken out. I remember I

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record that episode for you about shame, and how when we

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express what we're deeply ashamed us about ourselves to

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our partners, how we can create deep intimacy. The same goes

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with your wounded parts, with your stuff that you need to deal

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with. Once you are aware of that stuff, you can go out there and

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communicate this to people. And sometimes people are willing to

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go that path with you, and heal together with you because they

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can relate to your story. And sometimes you will find yourself

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all by yourself. And this is okay too. This only means that

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you want to learn to be sufficient enough and totally

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independent. Maybe you've only learned to exist in a

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partnership in a family dynamic. Maybe it is time now to realize

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that you are so endlessly precious, so worthy. You are

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enough and so strong, that you can allow yourself to be

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independent, and to make your own little experiences here and

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there. I hope I can bring you resolution and healing. I would

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love to hear your thoughts. I would love you to message me on

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Facebook or on Instagram and share your pain and what you're

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going through right now or what you had to go through in the

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past or what do you still feel you need to healed make sure you

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subscribe to my Youtube channel and to my podcast here on Apple

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podcast. And if I was able to touch your heart and to provide

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you healing, please leave me a review on Apple podcast it would

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mean the world to me. And if you have any questions, shoot me a

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message on Facebook always. And I will be out there very soon

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again for you. And I will post more episodes about heartbreaks

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because I feel it's very important to talk about it and

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to once and for all heal and not run around with half broken

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heart and keep being disappointed or keep hurting

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other people. Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart for

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listening to the Borealis experience here. I'm your host

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Aurora and I will be back out there for you