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Building Trust
Episode 13124th October 2022 • Lets Be Honest Before We Start Pretending • Kelly Mobeck
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Do you ever wonder why some people are great at creating the results they want in their life?  Do you think they must know something you don’t? What they have is ownership for their lives and what they are creating and what they are not creating.  Not only do they have ownership, but they have also increased their self-esteem, confidence, and growth mindset by building trust with themselves and with others. Tine to kick it up a notch in the ownership department, let’s dive in!



Here are the highlights from this episode:

(00:52) Feeling the fall vibes

(03:54) Trust can be rebuilt

(07:27) Creating more of the results you want

(10:31) Test and practice

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Hey everyone. I'm Kelly Mo Beck, a coach and a leadership trainer, and I'm super passionate about helping you find out who you are authentically as a leader, own it, and go out and make an impact in your life and the lives of others. This world needs your leadership, your gifts, your unique brilliance, and I believe that real leaders don't wait.

They create, I know firsthand that life is gonna throw us curve. That we're gonna doubt our greatness, our ideas, and our contributions. And my goal is that you believe in yourself beyond reason. And I get to be a coach and a champion for you each week so that you feel inspired, motivated, and most important in action toward your unique impact in this world.

So let's jump in. Hey there everyone. This is Coach Kelly. Welcome to another addition of, Let's be Honest, before we start pretending, how are you? How's your October going? Are you feeling the fall vibes? We are still like in some high temperatures here where I live, and I'm ready to feel. Some fall vibes.

Some fall vibes. So today I thought it would be really great since we are talking about ownership the entire month of October, what a great month to talk about ownership. We have talked about accountability and accountability as your bff. We have talked about managing stress. How great is that with the wonderful guest, April Lichens?

Oh God, that was a great one. And today we're gonna talk about trust and how we can be in ownership for ourself and be in integrity so that we are continuing to build trust with self and with. Stay with me here. All right. There's this quote that I love by Stephen Covey. Trust is the glue of life. It is the most essential ingredient in effective communication.

It is a foundational principle that holds all relationships. Boy, is that not true. That is so true. Trust is the glue of life. It is the most essential ingredient in effective communication, and it's the foundational principle that holds all relationships. The foundational, All right, here's a distinction I want to create about trust.

Trust is not the end destination, and then that. I have trust, right? It's not the end all destination. What I want you to know that in relationship we are building and breaking trust. All the time. All the time. Now, I am not talking about, well, I could be talking about some really big trust breakage, right?

And trust Billage , breakage and Billage. Breakage and billage, right? Yes. Okay. Those are those, those are all things, so we, we can talk about it at any level, quite frankly. What I want you to realize is trust is not an end. Destination unless you decide that it is. So how many times has somebody broken trust with you or you yourself have broken trust with yourself?

Okay, now, Do you decide that that's it? It is the end all. I no longer can trust myself or another human being. I don't know. Sometimes you might. That's completely dependent upon you. The beauty about trust is that it can be rebuilt. Okay? We, for my parents out there, we break trust with our kids and build trust with our.

all the time. Something as simple as saying that we are going to, you know, if you don't X, Y, Z, then the consequence is xyz and they don't do X, Y, Z, and you don't follow through with XYZ the consequence, right? That breaks stress. Right. It's the same thing in our communication, in our any relationship that we have, whether it's personal, whether it's professional.

If we do not follow through, we will break trust. Okay. When we are out of integrity, we will break trust. Stay here with me. When we are not allowing ourselves to be vulnerable and authentic and transparent. We can break trust with other human beings. If we are out in the world, you know, pontificating about something and we're doing something completely.

We will break trust. Okay. Lots of different levels of that. Some are very significant, some are somewhat significant and some are not that significant. And they, it can build and build and build like after a while, you know, if you're consistently not following through with what you say you're going to do or you're not practicing what you preach, or, or, or, or over time.

It is true. Somebody's not gonna trust you and you're not gonna trust yourself, okay? You're not gonna trust yourself. So when I talk about trust, is. Well, when Steven Covey talks about the trust is the glue of life. I agree. I agree. Because here's the thing that I see over and over again, whether it's with myself, whether it is with other people, is that when we are creating something in our life, we can either build trust with ourself or break it.

We can be in integrity with ourself or. , and here's the thing that I wonder. Here's the thing that I'm curious about, Is that the thing that could possibly get in our way for not even going for it? I'm just curious about that. I really, really am because truthfully, we don't really want to break trust with ourself and break trust with others.

We really don't. And yet we do it all the time. all the time. Anybody go on like a health kick, a health kick and we're going to, you know, I wanna lose X amount of weight and, uh, we don't. That could, we could break trust with ourself because we didn't follow through with whatever we said we were gonna do.

On the other hand, we can give ourselves permission to go again and begin to build trust, stay in integrity, be our best on that day. It doesn't have to be an all or nothing. It can be something so that. You are building trust with yourself that you will actually do the thing. You will actually be in integrity.

You will actually create more of the results you say you want. You will actually have much more vibrant relationships when you are being in integrity. And I think integrity and trust truly go hand in hand. And what is that saying? I'm not gonna get this right, right here, right now, but. , you know, do the thing even more.

No, when no one's watching. Cuz someone's watching. That's yourself. Ah. And wouldn't it be wonderful? Wouldn't it be wonder? So the thing here that I, again, I'm so curious about, and I'm probably gonna have some curiosity challenges running on this one because I like to test things out and see what happens.

o nifty new knees in the year:

So if I'm in ownership for this and I wanna build trust with myself, I know, I know the game plan. I've talked to the doctor. I have talked to friends who have had knee replacements. I don't know what I don't know, but I do know where I've gotta be in order to have the surgery. I know where I've gotta be.

I know that I want some upper body strength to be enhanced in. Some cardio. Some cardio right? And things like that. I know that I want to, uh, release some weight cuz I just think that's gonna help recovery so much more. And so these are the things that I know. So next step is to set a goal around that, not around that.

Let's not do it around that. Set a goal, period done. And then the next step is to create some accountability around that. And, Oh, do I? I have accountability partners several right now when it comes to this because this is a biggie for me. This one's a biggie for me. All right? And I really wanna be healthy.

I wanna have knees that work cuz I wanna get out and explore and live life to the fullest. It's a big deal. And there's this little voice inside my head that's like, you're not gonna do. You say you're gonna do it, but you're not gonna do it because you know what? You got other things that you wanna do, you've got other things that you gotta do.

There's just other things. Now, I've shared this before because I have a tendency to please, it could be very easy to just go right in, put everybody else in front of me. I am going to break trust with myself if I do that with my accountability partners, uh, family, my doctor, things like that. Okay. Not necessarily super significant for them, however, it is significant with me.

So what I wanna say here in this, and again, we will continue with this because I am going to test it and I'm gonna promise you, I will come back to this very podcast and share what I'm learning along the way because what I know is it will be helpful to someone. I absolutely know that. And so what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna test and I'm gonna practice, and I am going to move it from an idea to commitment, and I am gonna build trust and integrity within myself on reaching this goal.

Okay, everybody inhale and exhale with me. Ah, Now it's out there. And listen, this podcast is listened in other countries. So there's quite a few people now that have become accountability partners with me in this. But I want you to know the reason I'm speaking about trust is because it's in the context of ownership and ownership for what we say we want.

And just as much as accountability is your bff, take it to another level. It's your BFF squared Accountability and trust in order to be able to stay in integrity, which is like, ah, no anxiety in the integrity land. Maybe there's some, I don't know, they go hand in hand and they will be the catalyst to moving forward and creating more of the results you say you want.

So that's where we're gonna be. I'm gonna leave you with that drop in the curiosity challenges in that link. Anything that's percolating for you. Thank you for letting me tell on myself and share with you about this as a way to, As a way to. This example, and I'm gonna share with you all along the way, we may be talking about a different episode and I'll have an update.

And the goal is that we're gonna learn about building trust with self, with others, and staying in integrity with accountability in creating the results we want, even when it scares us, even when it feels hard, even when it seems inconvenient, no matter the circumstance we're making it happen. Any. We're bringing today.

In today. How about that? Because remember, we have a choice to lead our life, follow our circumstances, and who emerges from taking the lead in their life are authentic, vulnerable, courageous, in integrity, building trust with themselves and others, and it doesn't look the way we think it's supposed. It just doesn't, and we get to trust there.

That is again, that more's gonna get revealed as we move forward. So take those pauses. Let go of Roy. Let go of doubt and live fully the best version of yourselves. Thank you for listening today and I trust there was great value for you. And have a great week ahead. I'm excited next week. We have a great guest coming, Gia Hellwig, and we're gonna be talking some calendar integrity and also she's been on the podcast before a couple of times.

Wow. Does she have some updates for you? So I cannot wait for you guys to hear, uh, next week's episode as well. So have a great week. And you know the drill. If it's not shaping up the way you want it to be in ownership, take the lead and create a fantastic one. I'll talk with you guys next week when we have Gia joining us.

Have a great week ahead. Take care. Thanks for listening to another episode of, Let's Be Honest, Before we start pretending for more resources on taking the lead in your life, head over to Kelly j MOC dot. And connect with me on Instagram at Coach Kelly Moak. If this episode was helpful for you, please feel free to share it with friends.

Rate and review it on iTunes. That's Apple Podcasts now, and at any time, feel free to connect with me and let me know what you want to hear next or what you're working on. I'm happy to help. Thanks again for listening, and here's to you taking the lead in your life.