Shownotes
We picture cancer as a diagnosis and a treatment, and miss everything in between: the lingering side effects, the caregiver's quiet exhaustion, the grief that lands in small details. This conversation is for anyone walking that road.
Jonathan Brandt shares his and his late wife Christie's journey, and how staying proactive about side effects, mental health, and community can help you keep living through loss.
About the Guest:
Jonathan Brandt is the founder of Go Out Living, a community and podcast built in memory of his late wife, Christie. A cancer caregiver and survivor himself, he now helps others heal in mind, body, and spirit.
Key Takeaways:
- Don't ignore treatment side effects; get ahead of them early, even before treatment begins.
- Look beyond the medical system; explore nutrition, movement, and holistic support too.
- Caregivers carry the illness too; protect your own body and mind.
- Grief can hold joy; honor someone by living fully, not by stopping.
- Healing is a team effort; community can carry what one person can't.
Connect With the Guest:
Website: https://gooutliving.com/
Podcast: Go Out Living on YouTube, Spotify, and Apple Podcasts
Community: https://www.skool.com/gooutliving
Episode Chapters:
[00:00] Welcome and a Gentle Opening — Nazish sets the tone for a story that carries quiet weight
[03:30] Mornings, Walks, and Small Anchors — How Jonathan begins each day with intention [07:00] The Side Effects Nobody Warns You About — Why the aftermath of treatment gets ignored
[13:00] Stronger Together: Love Through the Fight — Jonathan and Christie's partnership under pressure
[18:00] The Eagle and the Spiritual Awakening — A sign that changed how Jonathan sees everything
[23:00] Healing Belongs to the Whole Community — Why no one should fight alone
[27:00] Going Out Living, Even in Grief — Choosing joy without erasing the loss (timestamps approx.)
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Transcripts
00:00:07 Nazish: Some stories carry a kind of way that does not announce itself in the first sentence. They come slowly in small details. The cup of coffee that tastes different now. The empty side of bed, the shoes by the door. Today is a story like that. A story of love, loss, illness, and a life rebuilt with intention. Out of all of it.
00:00:30 Nazish: Welcome to inner Peace. Better health. I am Nazish and my guest today is Jonathan Brandt, who is here to share his and his late wife Christy's cancer journey and the healing path that continued through him in her memory. So Jonathan, I welcome you to the show.
00:00:49 Jonathan Brandt: Thank you. Nazish. I'm really happy to be here.
00:00:52 Nazish: Takeaways. So before we go ahead, listeners,
00:01:33 Nazish: So, Jonathan, before we go all in, I want to ask you, what does a good morning look for you like these days?
00:01:44 Jonathan Brandt: It starts early. Uh, I'm usually about four thirty, uh, trying to get a little bit of work done before I have to get up. My youngest, uh, who I get up about six thirty. So, yeah, I get a couple hours of work in. I get him up about six thirty, we make breakfast and then get him off to school. And then I go straight to my morning walk, uh, which I do about an hour, a little over an hour, uh, with a weighted vest. But that's, that's my morning right there. And then I come back and I start doing more work.
00:02:18 Nazish: That sounds like a beautiful morning, you know, easy, relaxed and productive at the same time.
00:02:24 Jonathan Brandt: I like to think so, but I think the most important part is honestly, the morning walk for me is the most energetic part of it. You know, it just gets me ready for the day. Um, yeah. And I just, I needed in my life. It's so amazing.
00:02:40 Nazish: Absolutely. So, you know, when people hear the word cancer, they often think of the diagnosis and the treatment, and they assume that the story might end with a cure or a loss. They miss everything that happens in between the hidden symptoms, the effects that linger longer after the treatment. From everything you and Christy had to work through, what is the biggest misconception people still carry about their about a cancer journey?
00:03:09 Jonathan Brandt: The side effects are real. I think we completely ignore it. You know, we ignore even the basic ones that we see a commercial for on TV where it has a list of side effects. We all ignore it. The problem is we're using a lot stronger medications or treatments when we're talking about cancer. So the side effects are there going to be different for everybody? But we found them really debilitating. On Kristi's side, she ended up with neuropathy. She ended up with, uh, blood clots that actually got into her lungs. Uh, I struggled with weight. I gained a lot of weight. And then I had a lot of gut issues, which ended up with surgery. So that was the main thing we ignored. We ignored because you just want to survive at that point. You're in that fight or flight kind of mode, and you don't look at everything. You're in a hurry as well. It's like, hey, let's just get this in, you know, get going with the treatment so I can get back to work or get back to my family or whatever circumstances you're in and you forget about what's really happening to your body as far as the side effects. So I think that's the biggest mistake we made. And we just we flat out ignored it.
00:04:28 Nazish: Yeah. I mean, and also the way you said that it is going to be different for everybody, but those side effects are going to be there.
00:04:36 Jonathan Brandt: one hundred percent, you know, and that the worst part is a lot of it, I feel like the doctors know are the side effects, but there's nothing they can do. Or it means, okay, let's take another pharmaceutical, which means what more side effects? Uh, Christy really went down that rabbit hole, uh, because she was just in so much pain for so long. She was just trying everything. Um, but when it really came down to looking at that medical side to try and help with the side effects, they didn't have an answer for it. And a lot of circumstances, I thought they made it worse. You know, they couldn't even figure out blood thinners for her. Um, and she continued to get, you know, blood clots throughout, uh, her treatment once she started getting them. So it's, it's a crazy world, you know, but again, it's going to be different for everybody. That's why we always say, look outside of the medical world for some of that. But yeah, it's just there's no good answer to it.
00:05:39 Nazish: Absolutely. And, you know, this belief that it might be different for me gives a lot of people hope to fight through those things.
00:05:49 Jonathan Brandt: Oh, one hundred percent. You know, and that, I mean, that was the biggest thing for us was, again, if we would have got started earlier with the side effects or we looked into it even before we started treatment and took it seriously, who knows where we would have been. I think we would have been in a lot better place than where we ended up. So again, yeah, it's going to be different for everybody, but you can still get ahead of it. You can still be proactive even while trying to fight this horrible thing that we did, like cancer, you know, because it could be heart disease, it disease, it could be diabetes. There's so many different, you know, chronic diseases that you deal with, that people deal with. There's answers to the side effects or there potentially can be if you look.
00:06:40 Nazish: I completely agree with you that, you know, I think that the body is treated like yes. But the spirit in the marriage, in the identity all go through something to underneath the medical chapter of your story with Christy, what deeper patterns and the emotional shift the two of you were navigating?
00:07:05 Jonathan Brandt: The emotional side, again, I think I ignore it. I'm good at ignoring about everything. Uh, the spiritual side again, I was just, I'm probably a typical man that just thought, okay, physically, I'm just going to get through this. But then I really look back and we can start with emotional side. There was plenty of emotional moments, you know, from the diagnosis, whether it was Christy or me or different emotions, obviously. But they were there. They were real, and we complemented each other as far as how we went about this whole journey, this whole fight. We were very good at supporting each other. So unless you look back at it, you kind of didn't realize what was going on. But emotionally, we were there for each other from the beginning. It made us stronger. It made our love bigger, if you want to say, because it just there was no doubt that we weren't going to do this together. There was none. It was again, we got stronger. And today, again, I look back and this is why I'm doing what I'm doing. Because of her, because of Kristi's inspiration, because of her love and care and devotion to us as a family to me, was just amazing. You know it. I look back at when she moved away from us and at the time I'm like. Emotionally, yeah. It's like, what is she doing? You know, it was a very quick move. And a lot of it was okay. We had talked about doing the move. But you know, it's easier said than done in some circumstances. And she came to me like two days later after that conversation going, hey, by the way, I got a job and I'm moving, you know, and at the time I was like, well, is she running from us? But in reality, she was setting us up for a better future. She knew we needed to make that jump. So I can look back now and understand how not only strong she was, but how she put us ahead of everything because she shouldn't have been really working. I mean, she was in a lot of pain. She could barely walk. But that emotional side she put aside, as far as the pain and stuff that she was going through, to be there for us to do what was best for us. So it's easier to look back and understand it. But yeah, we were just completely we've always been in love, but it got stronger. The spiritual side was tough for me and it still is. I'm still learning that. One of the biggest things with the spiritual side that I found was again, after she passed, which again kind of sucks. I wish I could find it or would have found it before. Again, another reason I'm getting all this out there. But my son came to me. We were. We've been kind of doing some tattoos to kind of support each other. We got, you know, I got my ribbon, I got my wife's ribbon. I got some sayings. I now have a lot more. I got a full sleeve, but a lot of it is again, support memorial for my wife. And one of the things was my son said, hey, you got to get an eagle, dad. I'm like, why am I getting an eagle? I didn't, you know, they're beautiful. I get it, you know, they're America if you want to say. Um, and but there was something about the way he was saying it and how he was so adamant that I got it. And I went ahead and I got an eagle. And on my morning walk, I go by this lake. And I had seen an eagle there once in a while. Nothing, you know. Okay, beautiful is great. But all of a sudden, after Christie passed, that same eagle was in the same tree every day on that walk, whether it was raining or snowing, it was there. And that's when I finally knew that she was watching me. That's when the spiritual side started making sense to me. So it was quite the moment. And it's changed my life in how I look at things, you know, from every. We talk about holistics. It's mind, body, soul. You know, it's spiritual. It's all of that together. That's what I've been missing. And that's what I'm really fighting to hopefully help others with.
00:11:34 Nazish: You know, this is such a beautiful work that you're doing because, you know, coming from somebody lived experiences, make you trust them more, make you feel like, yes, there is so much going on and there is so much that you can do and make you notice little, little things more.
00:11:53 Jonathan Brandt: Oh, yeah. I mean, it's amazing what you, if you allow yourself to really open up, is when you're going to learn the most. And being able to tell my story, to tell Christy story. I have learned so much about myself. For instance, I just did a video this last weekend, which is going to be for the podcast and website and everything. But there was a moment that, okay, we want to show a before and after because of the weight loss part of it. Oh my gosh, I was so nervous. I was so like, I, I, I'm not a model, you know, I don't, you know, but I started to remember why I'm doing this. And it's to give others hope to understand that you can fight, you can not necessarily change. I don't want to say it like that, but you can self-improve and for me to okay, put everything aside. You know, I'm not that big, muscular, ripped guy, but I had a significant change in my life that was positive. I went from possibly passing away of obesity related disease to, okay, I lost the weight. Now we're going to keep fighting to survive. And yeah, I look better, I feel better, So even though it's difficult at the time, I now look back and can say, oh yeah, okay, this is helping me heal and this is going to help others along the way.
00:13:25 Nazish: Absolutely. Also, I think you, you know, the word that stay shared that stays with us, with you and the I think the illness is one person's diagnosis, but the healing belongs to the entire team.
00:13:45 Jonathan Brandt: Oh, I like that. Yeah. I mean, that's a community part of it. Um, I've been a real big advocate of community, even though I ignored it at first, as usual, you know, I thought I could do it all on my own. It wasn't until I found the go out living community that we started, that I really started to understand how important it is. It's. I have people coming to me to help heal me because again, physically on the outside, I look fine. On the inside, I'm a mess, I am, I hate to say it, I'm, I'm in a lot of trouble. Probably if you look at me medically from the inside out and I'm now having individuals come up and say, let's get you figured out where before I didn't have that, it was all on my own. Yeah, Christie was there with me, but nobody outside of us in the medical world were really part of anything. You know, we didn't really feel a whole lot of support, to be honest with you. Throughout this, even leading up to Christie's passing, you know, there it was a struggle. You know, I now understand how important it is, and that's why I'm bringing that community to everybody, because I get it now. I understand that in order for all of us to move forward, we got to do it together. So community is literally going to be everything if we want to change everything for our kids. We got to do it through a community because one person is just not going to make a difference. We can make. I like to say me and Christy are inspirations for finding that change, but it's going to take the community to be the influencers and that's what we can bring. If we get enough people together, we can go to the pharmaceuticals, we can go to the nutrition side, whether it's a grocery store or the the manufacturers and say, enough is enough. Stop giving us junk for the most part, and let's do it right. Let's try and actually help people instead of making it worse.
00:15:54 Nazish: And, you know, having that support in your life really changes a lot of things for you.
00:16:03 Jonathan Brandt: That journey is crazy, isn't it? It Again, looking back, it's it's been a heck of a journey. And I would say the first, you know, those three years just flew by and not really understanding what was going on. And again, that's something I wish we didn't do. I wish we didn't ignore everything. I wish we didn't. Unfortunately, I think we were so strong that we never looked at everything for what it was. We just continue to what I like to say move forward. One of Walt Disney's sayings, and again, we missed so much that could have helped us actually physically and mentally throughout our battle. Again, that's what I'm trying to bring to others is there's a lot that you can learn during that time. Yeah, we learned a lot, but a lot of it, we were just laid on. So be ahead of it. Be proactive. It will help you in the long run whether you survive or not. You know, obviously I hope to God you survive. But when you get out, I want you to be able to live. And that's the hard part. You might survive that cancer. You might survive that heart disease. But what kind of physical shape are you in at that moment? For us, we are on our back foot. We had to find it again. Unfortunately for Christy, we were too late. We couldn't. In the end, it was almost fifteen years that she. We think she fought with it. It was going to be a tough one to try and get her out of. For me again, I ignored so much. I had to have surgery over the summer because I ignored everything for so long. I don't want that for others. I want them to understand. You've got to be proactive. You've got to understand the side effects. You've got to understand, you know, every aspect to a healthy lifestyle ahead of time, and do it throughout that fight because then you can come out of it in a better situation, a better. Hey, maybe you don't even know you just fought it because you're in such good shape. You're eating healthy. So again, that proactive side of everything is so important. And again, find the spiritual, find the mental health, find the community. It'll help support you along the way.
00:18:26 Nazish: It does. It absolutely does. And you know, you started with go, go out living, you know, start. It started with an attitude, a way of meeting life when the road gets harder. But the real test of an attitude looks, you know, like this in an ordinary day, like three p m, tiredness, the medical bill, the appointment, and the grief that comes in waves in real everyday life right now. How does go out living show up for you?
00:18:55 Jonathan Brandt: That attitude is my daily attitude. I mean, it's that's what gets me up at four thirty in the morning. That's what gets me on my walk. That's what gets me to go play soccer with my my youngest, or go play hockey with him, or go skating or we went hiking this weekend. It's amazing, you know, to be able to do those things with your family. That's the attitude I go into every day with so I can do those things, you know? And that's helps me keep healing as well along the way. It's a never give up attitude. It's continuously dreaming. It's continuing to be a part of family and friends community. It has to be an everyday thing. Don't yeah, you're going to have your ups and downs. But if you continue to have that attitude that you're going to be there for everybody, that you're going to be there for yourself in the healthiest way you can, you're set. It's a whole different attitude. And guess what? It brings me happiness. It brings me joy. You know, I lost my wife. It is horrible. But I've never been happier because she put us on a heck of a path. She got us to. You know, I'm doing the podcast now Go Out Living podcast. I got the website. I am honestly helping others. So even though she's not here, that inspiration behind the attitude that she is bringing to so many other people, it just makes me smile. It brings me so much joy that, you know, I feel like that will bring a lot of people the same thing if they find that attitude.
00:20:38 Nazish: I completely agree with you that it is so true. And, you know, I think that a lot of people listening right now are going to feel that one quietly in the small choices on the hard day that nobody else sees. It does not get talked about enough.
00:20:55 Jonathan Brandt: Oh gosh. No, not at all. Well, that almost goes to the mental health side of it that I feel like, again, we all ignore. Everybody's scared to talk about it. And I don't really understand why. But take it seriously. You know it. If you don't have the mental health side of any of it, you're not going to have the attitude. You're not going to have the fight. You're not going to have the healing. We can talk about the spiritual. We can talk about all of it. And if your mental health isn't there, you're not going to have any of it or you'll have bits here and there. So from a holistic standpoint, again, one chunk out of that, you know that armor, you're not very strong. So you need every part of it. And the mental health side is probably the most important that we actually don't talk about because it's everything. It's what gets you from step one to two to three. You need to have that strength. You know, I think a lot of times, yeah, me and Christy, from a mental side of it, I think we were pretty strong, you know. But there were moments in there that, yeah, we kind of did things wrong and nobody talked about it. Nobody said, hey, let's look at, you know, the mental health side of it and how can we help you with that? Nobody does that. Again, that's where the community is going to come back in. That's going to be that support to help you along the way, to help motivate you to help be an inspiration. So yeah, that's what I would say is the mental health side. Stop ignoring it. You know, take it for what it is. It's extremely important.
00:22:38 Speaker 3: Yeah. Yes.
00:22:40 Nazish: I completely agree with you there. And this is so honest. I it's beautiful. And you know, I think I know that Christy's loss is recent and her presence still moves through your work. You have chosen to keep building, keep sharing, keep showing up, even in even in deep grief. So how do you sustain a healing mission? Like go out living while you yourself are inside the longest setback a person can carry?
00:23:10 Jonathan Brandt: Oh, that grief thing is funny, isn't it? Here's my thing with grief. I get it. We need it. But you can take it for what it is. It's a moment of, okay, we miss somebody. But if you make it a positive, like I said, if you find the joy in life in general, if you take the positivity from that person's life, that puts you in a whole different path. You can still be happy while grieving. So again, I don't like that. Okay, go lay down and cry and all that. I'm not saying don't cry, but I'm not. I'm saying don't just stop Living. Don't stop dreaming. Don't stop with your everyday life, you know, and a lot of people, that's how what they fall into. And it's so sad. And I get it. But unfortunately, death is part of us. It's the one thing we know is going to happen to all of us. So take it for what it is. Yeah, it can be too early. I get it, Christie was too early, but she gave us so much to go on. She again put us on a path to a better future. So I have to continually remind myself of that. And that brings me a smile that brings me that joy that brings me. Hey, she's there still. I know she's above us. Going. Keep going because you're on a heck of a road. And what also helps me, and I hate to say it, but one like on Facebook or one like on, you know, Instagram or something. Just one just just that Recognition that, okay, somebody's watching helps with continuing on doing what I'm doing, you know? Yeah. You want we all want a lot. But reality is one that takes time. But two, what are you really trying to do? Are you really trying to reach a million people or a thousand people, or does it matter? It'll get there if you believe in it. So don't take too much into that one. Like, but for me, it does mean a lot. It's okay, I'm doing it. And I'm not just being completely ignored, I guess is the way I look at it.
00:25:28 Speaker 3: Yes, yes.
00:25:29 Nazish: That really, you know, brings another life to this conversation. It's beautiful. And, you know, I think the mission is not to replace the grief. I think it carries it. And that is the part what makes it more sacred.
00:25:47 Jonathan Brandt: Oh, God. Yeah. You appreciate everything more? Yeah, you know it. I think a lot of times, yeah. Like I said, those people kind of crawl into a hole and, you know, crying and emotional and all that, which I understand. But are you really appreciating that person at that point? You know, are you celebrating what they brought to you? A lot of times we're not we're forgetting that part of it. So step back, look at what they actually did in your life and maybe the path that they put you on as well. Yeah. Have that appreciation. It's amazing.
00:26:25 Speaker 3: Yes, I, I.
00:26:27 Nazish: Completely agree with you there. And, you know, thank you so much for being with us on this podcast. And I think that a lot of my listeners would want to connect with you. We want to know more about your work and, you know, and the community that you have built. Where can they find you?
00:26:45 Jonathan Brandt: Yeah. Uh, go out living dot com is probably the best way. And remember, it's one word go out living. So if you're trying to find me on YouTube or Spotify, Apple podcasts, go out living, uh, all one word. You can find me everywhere. We're on all the major platforms. Like I said, uh, the school community, it's s k o o l dot com slash go out living again, all one word. And that's really where the community is being built. Uh, be patient with it. We're going through a lot of changes. Um, I'm going to start doing one on ones here pretty soon. So trying to get everything set up correctly, but please reach out. Come join us. Uh, I'm happy to talk to, to anybody and everybody, you know, and, you know, let's show some support for each other.
00:27:34 Nazish: Yeah, absolutely. Thank you so much, Jonathan. I will make sure to include all these details into the show notes so that a lot of people can reach out to you and learn from you. And, Thank you know, thank you so much for being your. And this was an absolutely beautiful conversation.
00:27:50 Jonathan Brandt: Oh thank you Nazish. It's always a pleasure.
00:27:53 Nazish: Yes. And to everyone listening, going out living in is not about pretending. The hard part is not there. It is about choosing to keep meeting life even gently. On the days that ask the most of us. We will see you in the next episode of Inner Peace. Better health. Till then, take care of yourselves.
