Have you ever had that experience in life, where you have worked really hard , made the sacrifices, done all of the things, got the prize, celebrated with friends and bubbly and then it's been a bot of a disappointment, not what you thought it would be?

In this episode we explore beliefs, values, expectations and some truths about life and happiness that if we just allowed ourselves to acknowledge, could make life easier on us.

I will begin the episode with some questions to ask yourself around what happiness really is for you?

I explore this and more in this weeks Choosing Happy Podcast.

I do hope you find this episode useful. Please share if you think this can help someone you know.

Links:

Choosing Happy

www.choosinghappypodcast.com

www.choosinghappy.co.uk/community

www.twitter.com/nlpwarrior

https://www.facebook.com/choosinghappypodcast

https://www.instagram.com/hvmasters/

Podchaser: https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/choosing-happy-1878162/episodes

What you can do now...

Join the wait list for the new community at www.choosinghappy.co.uk/community

Sign up for my Awakened Entrepreneurs Free Video Series. https://www.takingyourbusinessonline.com/the-awakened-entrepreneur

Drop me a line with any feedback you may have at heather@choosinghappy.co.uk

She got the job.

The one she'd studied for qualified for sacrificed time with her children

full invested heavily for yay.

Yet the.

Yay was brief.

Two months in and she realized it.

Wasn't how she'd pictured it.

She wasn't feeling how she wanted to feel.

She blamed herself.

She should be happy.

After all she got the job, the dream job, the hairy, scary goal job.

Yay.

Have you ever had the experience in your life where you've worked

really hard and made the sacrifices?

Don't all of the things got the prize celebrated with friends and

bubbles, and then it's been a bit of a disappointment, a dumped squared.

Uh, fact, you might have felt a bit ashamed to admit it and kept your

disappointment hidden for months.

Yes.

Decades even.

And worse still.

This could be playing out in many areas of our lives, work

relationships, social lives.

We may have trapped ourselves and settle land.

And this week's episode of the choosing happy podcast.

We explore beliefs, values, expectations, and some truths about happiness.

That if we just allowed ourselves to acknowledge, we could make

life a lot easier for ourselves.

All of this and more in this week's choosing happy podcast.

Hello, and welcome to the choosing happy podcast.

I'm Heather masters.

And in this week's episode, I'm going deep on the misconceptions of happiness.

What exactly is happiness?

And just the pursuit of happiness really lead us to happiness.

Here are some questions to ask yourself:

Will you be happy when you solve all of your problems?

Is the pursuit.

Of meaning more important than happiness.

Is happiness, the real end results.

Or is the pursuit where happiness lies.

Will you be able to choose happiness when you're in the midst of a

storm that life has thrown at you?

For there's usually many in a lifetime.

Some Morpheus and others.

Will you be resilient enough to hold a level of happiness?

Will you allow yourself to be happy, give yourself permission to be happy,

allow happiness to be your set point.

Even when things are dire.

And I don't mean pretend happy or frivolity.

It's the ability to be childlike rather than childish to see the

wonder, even in the darkness.

And the world of reaching for perfect.

And following trends that are set out for us using the media

and government narrative.

We can overlook our ability to choose what is truly for us.

To forget the notion of selfishness and to indulge ourselves in our true nature.

To sit and the energy of our beingness and notice that amongst

the horrors and the false, this.

The lies and the terror, the world would have a C.

There is beauty piece.

Surprise wonder.

Curiosity and magic right outside our doors.

If we look close enough.

The resilient flower that bursts through the concrete.

The solitary bird.

That sings at Dawn.

So his happiness about success and achieving.

Or is it about.

Being.

Is it a state?

Is it about appreciating the journey and acknowledging that the journey will

throw us challenges and hard stuff.

Yeah, recognizing it.

Isn't the struggles and the resistance where the magic is made.

Where the lead is changed to gold.

We're growth takes place where memories are made and where we astound

ourselves with what we can achieve and how powerful we really are.

It to seize.

This is to recognize that happiness is not something we strive for.

But as something to choose in the harshness of our journey.

Not just to lighten the load.

But to raise our energy.

Our spirits Our vibration, our strengths.

I sense, we need this more now than ever.

As we're in the midst of unique and unprecedented times.

When resilience and the ability to see the good, the positive.

The end goals.

While being present to the magic of the moment.

Amidst.

Drama and horror.

We'll be the key.

For God's smiling gladiators.

We must stand and maintain our light.

And sense of love and our power.

No matter what happens.

Jordon Peterson's definition of happiness.

Happiness.

It's the freedom from fear, stress, and anxiety.

Yeah, right now, we are seemingly trapped in a world

which strives by promoting fear.

How can you eliminate fear in your life?

Mainly switching off the mainstream media and the news and choosing really

choosing where you put your focus.

Can I make a massive difference to how much happiness you experience in your day?

I found that I've had an almost controlled guilt that if I'm not feeling worried

or stress than I'm not really living.

And I take this back to something.

My father said to me, when I really first experienced stress.

At work.

He said that I was now a true adults.

Because I was experiencing stress and I've been stressed ever since.

Trying to live up to being a true adults.

It's only recently that I've had some huge realizations around happiness and

also about stress, anxiety, and fear.

Fear is dished out daily.

Your governments.

The organizations in the world.

Want to keep us in fear.

If we're in fear.

We buy.

We purchase.

We try to protect ourselves with the products they sell us that

tell us that we're going to be.

Healthier.

We're going to be safer.

We're going to be happier.

All of this.

Takes away from the powerful.

Beings we are.

That we have our own set points, our own definitions of happiness.

We know how to be happy.

When we step away from the fear.

When we step away from the shirts and the Kurds.

When we step away from the false narratives that we even tell ourselves.

We have an opportunity.

To be happy.

It's a meaningful life.

Something better to strive for then a happy life.

After experiencing grief and depression.

At a number of times when things have changed drastically in my life.

One of the things that I know that's true for me.

Is.

The taking part.

The showing up.

The serving other people, the stepping outside.

The keeping moving.

The finding the meaning in each day, each hour, each moment.

That's part of what's really helped me grow and build my resilience in my life.

I think.

Parts.

Of the reason.

We're unhappy in general, . Is that we don't take the time to work

out what we really want anyway.

What kind of conditioned to want the things.

And even when we don't want the things and we want to move somewhere different.

It's not quite what we expect . The thing is you take yourself with you.

And I personally believe.

So you can't be happy anywhere.

Until you've shifted and grown within yourself and works out

what happiness is for you.

And that you are the creator of your reality.

I think happiness can be in any moment.

If we choose it.

And I'm not saying that we choose it a hundred percent of the time.

I don't think that.

Can be true.

We all have moments of darkness, of sadness, of anger.

But it's how we deal with them.

That really can impact.

How we show up and and whether we choose.

A higher response.

And personality questionnaires and the neuro-linguistic programming.

We find out what our values are by asking what's important to us.

Uh, values.

Aren't always obvious.

They're quite unconscious.

So where you think.

Is important to you, what you think you want in your life.

That's going to make you happy.

May not be that at all.

And there's probably patterns in your life where you think you can be happy.

And you go for the same thing.

And you can create a pattern of it, but then.

You leave and you blame.

The circumstances you blame the employer, you blame the partner.

But if you look back at the pattern.

It might not be that at all.

It might.

But it might not be that at all.

The meta-programs in neuro-linguistic programming.

Or even deeper.

Unconscious conditions that we have for ourselves.

That are specific to a unique personality and I need unique

perspective on the world.

So for instance, one of the meta-programs that I know I have is that.

I'm a differences person.

There's differences in sameness.

Sameness.

Obviously our people who want everything to remain the same.

And because of that, they struggle with change.

Now I'm quite a differences person.

So I became a consultant quite early in my career because.

My role would change.

My job changed.

It's one of the things I really liked about being in technology in it is that

I was working on different projects.

So I could be really content.

Because the work changed on a regular basis.

When I took admin jobs later in life.

I really struggled with those because things were.

Quite repetitive.

Pretty much the same.

And even working from home, I find I'm changing the furniture around.

Two or three times a year.

Or finding other places to work because the environment is important

and changing that around helps.

I keep my differences condition happy.

And it doesn't have to be something massive.

Your meta-programs and.

Your values are really quite crucial to your happiness.

To what you believe.

It's.

To fulfilling your needs at an unconscious level.

If your top four values aren't met, you will likely . Leave or do something.

To get those values met.

So for instance, If being with your family is.

Really important to you and it's in your top four.

Values.

Working overtime working.

We cans.

Committing to a job that demands a lot of you.

It's going to make you really pretty unhappy because it's against.

One of your core values.

One of the things about money.

Some entrepreneurs can.

with their relationship with money.

And we can put it down to a money mindset, your beliefs about money, but

your values are deeper than your beliefs.

And if money isn't in your top eight values.

As an entrepreneur or business owner.

You're likely to struggle if there are so many things that are more

important to your happiness than money.

You're probably not going to.

Want to sell so much.

So what's important to you and what your meta-programs are, can make a huge impact.

On whether you are happy on that.

This podcast is called, choosing happy.

It's easier to choose happy.

If you're aware of what your meta-programs are.

And what your values are.

Can you change your values?

Yes, you can.

that comes with a caveat of, if it's not really true for you.

At a deep, deep level.

they could Change back again.

Understanding.

A little bit about yourself.

Understanding what's made you happy in the past.

Understanding what's important to you.

Is really crucial.

To understanding.

Your happiness criteria You can also work out what you really want.

Using intuitive.

Coaching.

And meditation.

This year I completed the search costs and William White A series of natural success.

And using intuition.

To work out.

What you really truly wants.

Is.

Amazingly powerful.

Because in doing that.

Your.

Uncovering your heart's desire.

You're uncovering a world and a life where you will be truly happy.

And the focus of William's work is about focusing on the end results.

And at the same time being present.

Being happy with not knowing.

Being in the moment, just taking the next step that you've intuited.

It's about embracing the journey and face of adversity.

It's about embracing the tension and recognizing that

the tension, the hard stuff.

Is there to help you grow?

As I said earlier, it's where lattice changed into gold.

The ability to sit with the tension.

And absolutely know that you're going to reach your end results anyway.

And to take the action.

The one step.

That's.

You intuited to take today.

Without knowing.

While being happy, not knowing.

What's going to happen.

When you take that step.

I suppose ultimately.

It's about a connection to source.

Happiness is the ability to let go of anxiety, stress, and fear.

Most often.

We do this.

When we align with spirit, when we align with a God.

When we align with something greater than us.

In a way.

That we feel so loved.

Supported.

And comforted.

That the universe is working for us, not against us.

That everything that's thrown in our pass.

It's a lesser, an opportunity to grow beyond where we were before.

It's easy in the pursuit of happiness To focus our energy.

On where it's not working out.

Unfortunately, that tends to.

Bring The same results of things not working out.

Yeah.

And if we look each day, And I acknowledge the tiny things.

Yes, my PC.

Connected to the internet today.

Yes.

I had a really fantastic walk with my dogs today.

I had a small win with the email I sent.

An old friend connected with me.

All the small things.

My coffee was perfect today.

if we acknowledge those, if we focus on those.

We're thankful for those.

They help us.

To create more, to create bigger.

To focus on a heart's desire.

It sounds simple to focus on your heart's desire.

In my experience, my heart's desires.

Something completely different from anything I would

have sought up for myself.

And that's quite scary in itself.

It's about embracing it.

And going for anyway.

Trusting your intuition trusting that higher knowing.

That's why it becomes a spiritual experience to really live life.

As your true nature.

To really live life.

On purpose.

Your government.

Big tech.

' cause cops.

Don't want you to live on purpose.

Because he probably wouldn't choose their services.

You've probably wouldn't choose their conditions.

The power.

Of happiness.

Of contentment.

Lies.

In the spiritual path of using your inner power, your greatness, your

connection to source your creator.

To decide.

What happiness is for you.

And also how to.

Manifest that in your life.

As a simple start.

One of the things.

I know that I forget to do.

Is to define.

What happiness is for me.

And how will I know when I am happy.

Uh, to really get in touch with that.

Because happiness is a feeling.

And a feeling is a choice.

Or is it a state?

What is it for you?

How do you know, you're happy?

How do you know it'll last long term?

It's like a muscle, all of this.

Intuition is like a muscle.

It takes practice.

It takes awareness.

It takes.

Commitment.

It takes desire.

Embrace the journey.

Even in the face of adversity.

Build your strength and resilience by focusing.

On, what do you want?

Even in the face of massive change?

Even in the face of tension.

Of things that look against you.

Sometimes the very thing we think is against us.

It's pointing us.

Toward what we want.

Prioritize self care activities.

Becoming.

Intuitively guided.

Involves embracing the work.

involves embracing.

Your own unconscious.

that takes self care.

Cutting out alcohol.

Drinking more water.

Watching what you're putting into your body.

Because we're all energy.

You're picking up on energy when you Intuit.

You silence the mind chatter.

When you decrease the amount of chemicals you're putting into your

body, the amount of stimulants.

It's taken me.

A long time to get to where I am.

I naturally have.

Uh, very chatty mind, very noisy minds.

Very noisy ego.

He doesn't want me to succeed.

He doesn't want me to tune in.

All of this as well is about raising your consciousness.

We're raising your energy.

We manifest what we want by focusing on what we want, but at

the same time, holding that energy.

Really tuning into it to the energy of it is what we want.

So if we want better house on a beach, we really have to step into it and to feel it

and to feel what the essence is of what.

We will be given.

To what does it give you?

Why is it important?

Really focus in on.

The essence of that, the energy of it.

The pursuit of happiness for me, isn't a destination.

It's something.

That I consciously.

Evaluate each day.

Am I happy in this moment.

What could I change?

Where's my focus.

What can I appreciate to shift the energy?

Because it's the energy of peace serenity.

I love.

That creates the space for true happiness in my world.

Thank you for listening.

I hope you've gathered even a.

Small piece of information that has helped you today.

Please do.

Like, and subscribe and.

Share a review.

It would really help the podcast and help me.

Keep going.

Thank you again for listening.

I do appreciate your time.

I'm Heather masters.