As a new year begins, many of us carry more than we realize — shame, self-doubt, and the weight of what we wish we had done differently.

In this episode, we sit with a powerful moment between Jesus and Peter that invites us to release what no longer belongs to us. Not through striving or self-correction, but through love, honesty, and grace.

If you’ve ever felt stuck in a past version of yourself or questioned whether you can truly move forward, this conversation is for you.

As you step into this new year, what might God be asking you to finally lay down?

If today’s message blessed you, please share it with a friend and follow Born to be a Butterfly so you never miss an episode. 

📖 Ready to dive deeper into healing and transformation? Get my book, From Broken to Butterfly, on Amazon today! 

📩 If you have any questions or want to connect, send me a DM on Instagram at Born To Be A Butterfly or email me at ninapajonas@gmail.com. I love hearing from you! 

Remember, the Lord can turn your wounds into wings—you were Born to be a Butterfly! 🦋

Welcome back to Born to be a Butterfly,

where we embrace healing and growth in Christ so that we can experience true transformation.

My name is Nina Pajonis, and I pray that today's message ministers to you.

Today is New Year's Day,

and I want to begin this year differently.

Not with pressure,

not with resolutions,

not with striving,

but with truth,

with trust,

and with what the Lord placed on my heart.

Today's episode was not planned.

It was given to me.

It came as a revelation that stopped me mid thought and pressed straight into my spirit.

It began with a question Jesus asked Peter after the resurrection.

It was a question that didn't stay on the page.

It followed me into my own life.

And the question was,

do you love me?

The question is not a theological exercise.

It's not a rhetorical question.

It is a real searching invitation.

Because when Jesus asked Peter that question,

he wasn't just asking for words,

he was asking for honesty.

So today I want to sit with Peter by the charcoal fire.

I want to sit with that question honestly, and I want to invite you to do the same.

Not to condemn yourself,

but to grow.

Before we get to the charcoal fire,

it's important to understand where Peter is.

Peter loved Jesus deeply.

He walked with him.

He witnessed miracles.

He was bold,

passionate,

outspoken.

But when the pressure came,

when the danger became all too real,

something surfaced in Peter that I don't think even Peter knew. He carried fear.

When Peter denied knowing Jesus.

I don't believe the deepest pain came only from what he said and did.

I believe it also came from what it did to him internally.

In that moment,

Peter might have been questioning his identity.

He very well could have been questioning who he thought he was in Christ.

I can only imagine that he felt like he failed Jesus.

And I say that because I know that there are moments in my story where I have felt the same way.

I think at some point in time, we have all felt the same way.

And when we feel that way about ourselves,

we don't just pull back emotionally,

we pull back spiritually.

Sometimes we'll even disqualify ourselves because we feel we've disappointed Jesus.

And I think that's where Peter was living.

So he went back to fishing.

He went back to his old life,

not because he forgot his calling, but because he was stuck in a moment where he believed he lost his identity.

But then comes the resurrection.

Peter thought it was over.

He thought the story had ended,

Jesus had been crucified.

But the resurrection declared something powerful.

What looked like the end was really the beginning.

Jesus returned after the resurrection, not just to fulfill prophecy, but to restore and strengthen and call his people forward.

And this matters because some of us are stepping into the New Year,

still believing that what happened in the last season was the end of our story.

We are stuck in a chapter when Christ has already closed it.

We must remember that the resurrection tells us otherwise.

After his resurrection,

Jesus finds Peter and the other disciples back where they started fishing.

And Jesus doesn't call out Peter in front of everyone.

He prepares a charcoal fire.

He invites them all to eat.

And they have breakfast.

And it's after they've eaten,

after fellowship,

after provision,

after care,

that Jesus speaks directly to Peter.

I'm going to read from John 21, verses 15 through 17, NIV because this is the heart of what the Lord is showing us today.

When they had finished eating,

Jesus said to Simon Peter,

simon,

son of John,

do you love me more than these?

Yes, Lord. He said,

you know that I love you.

Jesus said,

feed my lambs.

Again,

Jesus said, simon,

son of John,

do you love me?

He answered, yes, Lord, you know that I love you.

Jesus said,

take care of my sheep.

The third time, he said to him, simon, son of John,

do you love me?

Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time,

do you love me?

He said,

lord, you know all things.

You know that I love youe.

Jesus said,

feed my sheep.

Jesus doesn't wait for Peter to feel worthy. He doesn't wait for Peter to fix himself.

Jesus meets Peter exactly where Peter is,

by a charcoal fire.

And that detail matters because the only other time we see a charcoal fire mentioned is when Peter denied Jesus.

Peter wasn't just remembering that moment.

He was still living there,

mentally,

emotionally, and spiritually.

So Jesus brings Peter back to that place,

not to shame him,

but to restore him.

Peter had been stuck there,

so Christ brought him back there to renew him and to re anchor his identity.

Jesus restores Peter's identity in the very place where Peter believed he lost it.

And when Jesus asked Peter, peter, do you love me? And then says,

feed my sheep,

this was not a test.

This is Jesus refusing to let Peter give up on himself.

It's Jesus saying,

I know what happened.

I know where you're stuck,

but I'm not finished with you.

If you love me,

follow me.

Scripture tells us in 2 Corinthians 5:17 that in Christ we are made new.

It says, therefore, if anyone is in Christ,

the new creation has come.

The old has gone,

the new is here.

But being made new does not mean transformation is instant.

Transformation is continuous.

The old Self dies in layers,

and the new self emerges over time.

Peter didn't become the man God called him to be in a single moment.

He became that man through restoration,

forgiveness,

obedience and growth.

And the same is true for us.

If we don't understand that transformation is ongoing, we will condemn ourselves for not being fully formed. Yet when Christ is still shaping us,

Scripture clearly tells us in Romans 8:1 that there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.

And this matters because conviction and condemnation are not the same thing.

Conviction corrects us when we're going off course,

but condemnation will have us closing doors that Christ wants us to walk through.

If condemnation were from Christ,

Peter would have stayed a fisherman.

And this is where we need to remember who Jesus actually is.

Jesus Christ is our Lord and Savior.

As Lord, he leads us forward in faith,

and as Savior,

he rescues us from this broken world and from ourselves.

The Lord showed me something here that changed the way I see repentance and growth.

Jesus never sits Peter down and tells him to explain himself.

He never reviews what went wrong.

He never replays the moment for Peter.

Instead,

Jesus said,

do you love me?

Which I believe is the Lord's way of asking Peter why he followed him in the first place.

It is a reminder that love never fails,

that love always forgives,

and that love is what allows us to move forward faithfully.

Love is the anchor.

Love should never lead you back to who you were before you met Christ.

Shame whispers,

go back.

Love says,

come with me.

I think that Peter had been living at that charcoal fire in his mind and in his heart.

So Jesus met him there deliberately.

Not to leave him there,

but to free him.

Jesus cut the shackles of shame off of Peter's soul by the charcoal fire.

This is not about approving our past.

This is not about minimizing what went wrong.

This is not about loving what we did.

This is about loving Jesus.

Once those shackles were cut,

Peter could stand again.

He could love again and walk forward in faith.

Scripture tells us in Philippians 3, 13, 14 that moving forward requires release.

Brothers and sisters,

I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it.

But one thing I do forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead,

I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.

We cannot run the race ahead of us if we are constantly looking backward.

Forgiveness is not excusing behavior.

It is freeing ourselves to grow.

We are flesh and spirit.

Jesus knew every moment that we would struggle before we ever lived them.

We are not surprising him and he still chose us.

So as you step into this new year,

set this down.

Set down shame.

Set down self condemnation.

Leave them at the feet of Jesus.

Jesus did not meet Peter at the charcoal fire to remind him of his weakness.

He met him there to restore him.

Peter didn't answer him perfectly. He answered the Lord honestly.

And that honesty became the foundation for everything that God built through through him.

So if you love God deeply,

but are still growing into the strength of that love,

you are not disqualified.

You are being formed.

As you step forward into this new year.

Forgive yourself.

Let the past remain where Christ redeemed it and walk forward in faith.

Because the same Jesus who restored Peter is restoring you.

The same Jesus who transformed Peter is transforming you.

And now I'd like to ask you a question.

If Jesus was in front of you today and he asked you,

do you love me?

What would your honest answer reveal about where you're being invited to move forward with him?

Christ is calling us forward.

Are you ready to answer the call?

Let's pray.

Lord Jesus,

thank you for meeting us where we are.

Not to shame us,

but to restore us.

Thank you for loving us with a love that does not rehearse our past,

but redeems it.

Lord Jesus, you see the places where we have been stuck,

the moments we have replayed in our minds, and the shame we have carried that was never meant to follow us into a new season.

By your grace,

we ask you to please help us release those burdens now.

Lord, please teach us to hear your question the way Peter did.

Not as condemnation,

but as an invitation.

Anchor us in our love for you.

Not in perfection,

not in fear,

not in our striving,

but in our love for you.

Please cut the shackles of shame from our souls.

Help us forgive ourselves the way you have already forgiven us.

And give us the courage to. To walk forward faithfully, trusting that what you are building in us is good.

We step into this new season with open hands,

with our hearts fixed on you,

and our lives surrendered to your leading.

We love you.

We love you. Lord.

It is in your holy and precious name that we pray.

Amen.

I couldn't help but get emotional.

It's such an important prayer.

It's such an important way for us to start the new year with releasing what we were never meant to bring into it.

Thank you so much for being here today.

Thank you for listening.

If this episode blessed you,

please share it with someone who could use the same encouragement.

If you have a prayer request or would like to connect.

You can DM me Born to be a Butterfly on Instagram.

You can also email me and the link to my email is in my episode description.

Until next time,

Remember,

transformation is possible.

Healing is holy.

The Lord can turn your wounds into wings.

You were born to be a butterfly.