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Mari offers a love letter to Christian women who feel behind, addressing comparison, the pressure of “should,” and the call to live in the present with faith, hope, and surrender, even in seasons of waiting like her ongoing infertility. She reflects on how God has worked through five years of waiting to shape her marriage, community, and business, and encourages listeners to bring comparison to prayer and be generous with their yeses to God.

00:00 Back From Mexico

06:13 Different Pages

09:45 Waiting And Infertility

11:25 Comparison Trap

13:50 Milestones In Waiting

21:04 Life Not On Hold

26:23 Surrender Faith Hope

30:15 Q And A Spanish Story

31:46 Colombian Roots

33:56 Keeping Spanish Alive

37:38 Bilingual Future Kids

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Episode Sponsors

Crunchi - crunchi.com/mariwagner

West Coast Catholic - westcoastcatholic.co

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Hey, I am your host, Mari Wagner,

and you're listening to The Ever Be

2

Podcast where Faith Meets Lifestyle.

3

I'm so excited you're here.

4

Whether you're a new listener

or a longtime follower, I know

5

there's something here for you.

6

Pull up a chair and listen in for

insightful, real life conversations and

7

actionable steps on how to claim the.

8

Full life God created you for.

9

If you're a woman desiring to live

a Christ-centered life in today's

10

modern world, then this is for you.

11

Welcome to ever be.

12

mari-wagner_2_04-01-2026_123525: Hello

and welcome back to The Ever Be Podcast.

13

As always, it's me your host, Mari

Wagner, and I am back in the podcast

14

studio, if you will, which is just a

loft in my house, but I'm back home.

15

If you've been listening to the last

couple episodes, you have either heard or

16

seen, um, if you watch the videos of this.

17

That I've been in Mexico the past month.

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We literally went for an entire month

and we just got home last night.

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So I do apologize for the delay of

this episode coming out a little

20

bit later in the afternoon today.

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But as always, we kind of can't seem to

avoid travel delays and flight delays.

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Somehow it's just like been

hitting us So ma so bad lately.

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And of course our flight got

delayed to Colorado yesterday, so

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we ended up getting home around.

25

Almost two in the morning.

26

I think it, I think I got in bed at

1 45, um, or 1:50 AM so pretty late.

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I was absolutely.

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Exhausted.

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But I am really excited to chat today.

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Um, today's episode is gonna be

a love letter from me to you.

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It's honestly just, it's a love letter

to the Christian women who might

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feel like they're behind in some way.

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And I think that as women, we

struggle a lot with comparison and.

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I've just seen that play out in so many

women's lives, including my own at times.

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And it doesn't matter if you're maybe

like in the state of life that you

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wish for and prayed for and wanted.

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Oftentimes there is in some way

something that makes us feel like we're

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quote unquote not where we should be.

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Right.

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Um, and those are not.

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That's just not the Lord.

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Um, and I've learned this a lot along

the way that like sometimes we're

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hardest on ourselves and we place these

expectations, these like self-imposed

44

expectations on ourselves to reach

something or to be somebody or accomplish

45

something by a certain time because

we quote unquote, should be there.

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And that word should is just, it's just

heavy and it's shaming sometimes because.

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It just, it's just implying that

like you're not good enough.

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It's just implying that

you're not doing good enough.

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And, I have learned like the

Lord lives in the present.

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He doesn't learn live in

the past or in the future.

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And so this self-imposed idea of should

implies something about the past or the

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future, um, that you're unhappy with

or that wasn't done in the way that

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you thought it would be when in reality

like The Lord lives in the present

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and he's leading us in every moment.

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And as long as we are living for

the kingdom, as long as we're being

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disciples of Christ and following him

and living in grace, like we're, we're

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doing his will as best as we can.

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So we are exactly where we should be.

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Right?

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So I don't know, so I'm just gonna kind of

like dive into a little bit of that today.

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I just.

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Almost got on my soapbox

right then and there.

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But before we kick it off with the

content, we have to talk about our ever

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be moments, which it's just me today.

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So I'll just be sharing

my own ever be moment.

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And for me, it's gotta be just

how much Mexico loves Mary.

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I posted a real about it this morning,

but I was just getting little clips and

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videos and pictures of all the little

images and statues of Mary that I was.

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Seeing along the way in Mexico.

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And honestly, I wish that I had thought

of that at the very beginning of the trip.

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'cause I didn't think about it

until like the last like two weeks.

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But I would've had probably tripled

the number of videos and pictures

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and stuff if I started on day one.

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'cause she is everywhere.

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I love Mama Mary so much.

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She has played such a

big role in my life and.

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Just seeing her everywhere just warmed

my heart so much and just continually

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reminded me of her motherly love of

her motherly protection and thinking

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of her just reminds me of Jesus.

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And recently it was the

Feast of the Annunciation.

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And so I just was holding that

in my heart, just her courage to

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say yes and be a mother to the

Lord and be a mother to all of us.

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Um, so she's my ever be moment just.

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Love Mary.

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Loved seeing her everywhere.

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Go check out the reel.

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We'll link it in the show

notes if you wanna see it.

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Just all the beautiful little images of

Mary that I found around the streets.

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Um, like, like everywhere, right?

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Like everyone's home has some sort of

Our Lady of Guadalupe image or statue,

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like in the front of their home.

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And like hotels would have it.

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We stopped by a beautiful church that had

a gorgeous statue of her, like stunning.

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Um, she's everywhere.

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And it's actually so funny, not this

past trip, but I think a couple trips

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ago that we went to Mexico, I was

talking to an Uber driver and I don't

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remember how we got on the topic of

Mary or Catholicism or whatever, but

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he, I think wasn't even Christian.

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I think he was literally.

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Not even Christian, but he called

himself a guano, like AKA follower of

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our Lady of Guadalupe, but like not

even Christian, which is so funny 'cause

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I'm like, once you really know and love

Mary, she always leaves you to Jesus.

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So I mean, pray for all those who

don't know Jesus and, and love Mary

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and hopefully that they'll find him.

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But I just thought it was so funny.

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Like our Le Guadalupe so loved in Mexico.

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Even people who aren't

Catholic absolutely love guad.

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So shout out to her.

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That's my ever be moment.

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Um, I would love to hear your

guys' ever be moments truthfully.

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I don't know if y'all have any, but

if you wanna send a DM to at Ever Be

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podcast on Instagram, I would absolutely

love to hear your Ever Be Moments and

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maybe next episode I'll read them.

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How about we do that?

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That would be so fun.

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Like I can read out all your guys' ever Be

moments and we can just chat about like.

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What it's like to see the Lord in our

everyday lives and how he's presenting

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himself in everyone's life because that

builds up each other's faith so much.

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That builds up my faith so much to hear

how he's working in someone else's life.

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And I hope that hearing my ever be

moments helps build up your faith too.

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Okay, let's just dive

into today's conversation.

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What inspired me to talk about this

topic is just conversations I've had

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with different women in the last couple

months and just seeing where people's

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hearts are at where they wanna be, and

that tension of like trying to live in the

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moment, but then also just being okay with

feeling the feelings of disappointment

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that you're not where you wanna be.

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Um, and so I made this real

recently, um, that said, I'm just

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gonna read it off right here.

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Getting drinks in your late twenties.

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Is someone getting engaged

or someone getting married?

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Someone going on their hundredth

first date, someone getting their

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masters, someone staying home,

someone announcing their pregnancy.

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Someone who's quietly waiting for a

positive test, someone buying a house,

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someone struggling to save money.

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Someone traveling the world, someone

dreaming of a different day to day, but

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God has a plan for all of his children.

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No one's ahead of where they should be.

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No one is behind of where they should be.

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You are right where God wants you.

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We are all just on different

pages of our stories.

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He is writing.

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Remember that?

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So, yeah, I think what's crazy and

unique about, especially your twenties,

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probably still in your thirties, but

especially your twenties, like this

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decade, so much happens in this decade.

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I mean, you literally have someone

who is still in college in their early

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twenties, and then you have someone who.

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Like late twenties, 28, 29, and

could be living a completely

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different reality is likely living

a completely different reality.

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Like could be having multiple kids at

that point and buying a home and raising

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a family and well in their career

looks so different than like figuring

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out friendships and relationships

in college and finding your faith,

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or graduating and finding a job.

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going on dates and trying to find

the one and settling down in a

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city and, and all of that, right?

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There's, there's such a wide spectrum of

what life can look like in your twenties,

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which can trigger a lot of these, like.

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Fears and feelings of comparison of like,

gosh, and, and just like a, like a rush

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almost in like a competition of just

like, I need to live up to everybody else.

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Um, and so today we're just gonna, we are

just gonna, I'm giving you permission to

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just like put those feelings aside and

for me it's really like an internal voice.

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So if you have a tendency of just that

internal voice kind of like yapping

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at you, like snapping, we're gonna.

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I wanna say thank you so much to this part

of myself for wanting what's best for me.

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We know it comes likely of a from a

place of love and dreams and passion

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and ambition, but we're gonna set

you aside and we're gonna give

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ourselves grace today, and we're

gonna be patient with ourselves.

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And we're just gonna acknowledge

first and foremost that it's hard.

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Of course, it's hard.

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It's hard to be in a place of waiting.

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It's hard to feel like you're not

where you thought you would be.

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Um, when you're seeing friends, getting

engaged, getting married, getting

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pregnant, growing a family, maybe

well in their careers, rising in their

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careers, growing their businesses,

figuring things out maybe faster than

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you are or faster than you thought they

would be or you thought you would be.

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, There is that quiet comparison of feeling

like I thought I would be there by now.

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And within that, there's that spiritual

tension of trusting God, but also

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maybe feeling like almost forgotten

by the Lord and like wondering.

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What are you doing?

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God?

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And I know I felt that way

for so long with our story

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of, um, infertility right now.

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The first few years I just like

could not grasp what was going on.

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'cause I literally was like.

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The Lord forgot about me.

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Like the Lord walked away,

stopped writing my story.

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And how the heck do I like wake him

up and get his attention again to

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be like, hi, remember me, I'm here.

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Let's like, let's keep going.

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We have life to live, right?

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And in the past year I've learned so

much about how like God never walks away.

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He never stops writing your story.

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He is.

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The most active character in your life,

whether you know it or not, whether

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you feel it or not, and he is writing

your unique story that's going to

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look different than someone else's.

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And where I'm going to challenge you

spiritually Is in that paradox, right, of

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loving the one who provides for you, who

is all powerful, who brings you comfort

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and strength, as well as the one who

gives this cross to you and is waiting

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to answer your prayers in his time.

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Right?

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And ultimately, it's that same person.

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It's the Lord.

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He does both.

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And it's hard for us in our human

minds, and hearts and brains

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to understand and love both.

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Um.

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And you can deeply love God and trust God

wholeheartedly and still wonder why your

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life looks so differently than what you

thought it would look like, or why things

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aren't moving in the same sort of speed

or form that you thought that they would.

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And I just wanna say a

note here on comparison.

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Comparison.

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You guys, it's so true.

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That line that says, A

comparison is a thief of joy.

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It's just It can absolutely destroy you.

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And if you feel comparison creeping

up in your heart, don't let it grow.

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Take it straight to the Lord and ask

him to reveal to you his love for you

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and your uniqueness as his daughter.

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Because comparison stems from that

fear of like, am I not enough?

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Is she better than me in some way?

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And that comparison of like, I wish I was

like her, but why would you wish to be

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anybody else but who God wanted you to be?

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The incredible creation

that God created you to be?

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And one thing that I've reflected on in

the past is like, the more we critique

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ourselves, the more we're critiquing

the artwork of an incredible creator who

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thought of you so intentionally that he

made you in the exact way that you are on

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purpose for a purpose with an intention.

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You, your body.

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Your vocation, your life, your

calling, it all has a purpose

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and an intention that that was

thought of from the very beginning.

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And everybody's story looks different.

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And I just, I want to say something

right here that I feel like, I haven't

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really said much on Instagram, but I have

gotten, um, over the past probably two

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years, it's not an overwhelming amount of

messages, but I've gotten a few messages

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and even some people in my life in person,

whether they're close friends or distant,

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or maybe I meet someone in person.

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I have gotten a couple times women

outwardly telling me, I was scrolling

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through your content and I was so jealous

of you, and I found myself comparing

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myself so much to you, to your home,

to your life, to your business, to

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your relationship, everything, whatever

it is that I had to unfollow you

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or maybe some people wouldn't

unfollow me or they, and they

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would just say like that.

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It just like.

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Made me feel so bad about myself.

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And usually when people are telling

me this, it's, it's a really strange

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thing to receive because they're saying

that, but then it kind of spins into a

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positive and they're like, and then you

shared a vulnerable post about X, Y, Z.

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And I learned that like

you're just a human being.

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Like all of us.

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Or the most recent one I got was,

um, when I shared this post about.

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Um, kind of some milestones that have

happened as we've waited to have kids.

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It was a carousel recently on Instagram

that said if I had gotten in my first

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year of marriage, let me just, lemme

just read it to you guys so that you

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guys know what I'm talking about.

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Okay.

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It said, if I had gotten pregnant in

our first year of marriage, I would not

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have had the capacity to be as available

to walk closely with my students in

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my time as a focus missionary, and I

may not have gone full-time with my

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business baby West Coast Catholic.

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If I had gotten pregnant in our second

year of marriage, I may not have been

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able to rebrand our business, launch

a whole new website and expand beyond

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rosaries into lifestyle products.

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And we probably wouldn't have

done a three week trip to Europe.

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If I had gotten pregnant in our third

year of marriage, I might have not

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been able to sell and pack up my house,

throw together a huge seek booth, give

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my first public talk at Seek, buy a new

house, and move states all in four weeks.

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And I likely wouldn't have been

able to take all the opportunities

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for girls trips, international

family travel and work trips that

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were presented to us that year.

270

If I had gotten pregnant in our fourth

year of marriage, I'm not sure if

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I would've launched a new brand and

website as well as a podcast that ranks

272

in the top 1% of podcasts and been able

to pour into my Instagram to reach the

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milestone of a hundred thousand followers.

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And I probably wouldn't have been able to

start a weekly bible study in a monthly

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marriage group in my real life community.

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And Trey might not have taken the

leap to quit his full-time job

277

to come work for our West Coast

Catholic and Ma c Wagner brands.

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If I have gotten pregnant in our fifth

year of marriage, I might not have

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had the time and space to remodel the

downstairs living spaces of our home

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and likely wouldn't be hosting

elaborate dinner parties every

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month that we enjoy so much.

282

And I'm not sure I would've been able

to pour as many hours into hiring an

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incredibly talented team, designing

dozens of beautiful products and

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surpassing our biggest sales goal.

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Yet with our business.

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And living in Mexico for a month for

try to attend a Spanish immersion

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program may not have been as feasible.

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Do I wish I had gotten pregnant

in all of those years of

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trying and praying for a baby.

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Of course, I long for it every single

day, but I'm so grateful for the years

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the Lord has gifted us to pour into

our marriage, our community, our home,

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and our business while we wait for and

prepare for our chapter of parenthood.

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Yes, absolutely.

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It's hard to imagine life any other

way, which is just crazy to say.

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Do I believe that you can accomplish

incredible things while being

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a mother and raising children?

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A hundred percent.

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And I cannot wait to see what

that looks like for us one day.

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But I also know my heart and my desire

will be to pour in my all into my

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babies and when they come, we likely

won't be able to move at the same

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pace that we do with our life now.

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And all this to say God is our

good and loving father that has

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good things in store for us.

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And sometimes they look vastly different

than what we thought they would.

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But if you give your life to him and be

generous in your yeses to him, you'll find

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the greatest fulfillment, joy, peace, and

freedom that you have ever experienced.

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And in the end, after all these five

years, I thank the Lord for sticking

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to his plan and not mine that I try

to convince him of so many times.

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Because even in the waiting, he

clearly has not been withholding.

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And one day when our prayers are answered

in the way we've been longing for, I know

311

I'll look back on these years, not just as

the season we waited, but as the season.

312

He worked so intentionally in our

heart, our home, our marriage,

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and our life, and all of that will

make the gift all the more sacred.

314

So that was my love letter to

myself, basically as a Christian

315

woman, um, who feels like

they're behind sometimes, right?

316

I look at my friends, I'm 28,

A lot of my friends are 28, 29,

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and in their early thirties now,

and they're having multiple kids.

318

And I could easily, so easily, and I

think it would be so understandable

319

for me to just constantly fall into

comparison and constantly hate my life

320

because it doesn't look like theirs.

321

But in posting this, I'll, I'm gonna

bring it back around to what I was saying

322

about this comment that I got, um, and

how I think I've received a few comments

323

of people speaking about comparison.

324

This is the most recent one I got.

325

Wow.

326

Wow.

327

A while back I was enjoying time

scrolling through your account.

328

When I was hit with jealousy, I found

myself wishing I had done something.

329

Like you had created a beautiful

Catholic shop where I got to design

330

rosaries and home decor, and most

of all, where I got to retire.

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My husband from his job that keeps

his tie down door, dusty little

332

hometown, and instead had the

freedom to relocate somewhere nicer.

333

But I thought to myself, I could have

never done that through four hyperemesis

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pregnancies and the busyness of mom life.

335

This post made me realize there's

always a flip side to every coin.

336

You've certainly created something

special in this time of waiting.

337

So this is what I mean, where

like it's, it's kind of weird

338

to get these messages sometimes.

339

Like the first half.

340

It makes me feel so bad

if I'm being honest.

341

I'm like, crap.

342

I, I never want my content to

make anybody feel less or bad

343

about themselves in any way.

344

And so I just wanna say

that to you right now.

345

Like, genuinely, if you've ever

felt that way, I'm, I'm sorry.

346

And at the same time, I'm

sharing my life as it is.

347

If you're my friend in real life,

you're getting the same thing you

348

see on Instagram and more, right?

349

Like, and more like you don't

see everything on social media.

350

And so on one end it's like kind of

weird and hard to hear that because

351

I never wanna hurt anybody and I, I

genuinely, my heart is to build you up

352

into inspire you and to encourage you.

353

And then the second half of these

messages and comments always end with.

354

And I got to see a closer look at your

life and was like, wow, there's two

355

sides to every coin and you're doing

something great and I realized your

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heart and so now I follow you again.

357

Or it made me feel better about

myself or I realized that we're

358

all in our own journey, right?

359

And so in the end, I appreciate and

I love the reflection, some women are

360

able to get to right of like, oh, she's

on her own path just as I am, right?

361

Because in this message

I just shared, right?

362

She.

363

Is a mom of four babies.

364

Like, gosh, like what a blessing and

a gift, and like how much would I love

365

to have multiple children right now?

366

Right?

367

And so it's just a testament to the

fact that we are each and every one

368

of us, we are all on our own paths.

369

And what makes the difference.

370

Right.

371

What makes the difference in our life and

how we feel about our life is what we do,

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how we act, and our relationship with God

and ourselves in that season of waiting.

373

And as you can see by this way that I

shared about our life and our season

374

of waiting, we have chosen to live

life to the fullest that we can.

375

Um, a friend of mine, Mackenzie

Hunter, she's a caffeinated Catholic.

376

She talks a lot about this concept,

um, about like, your season of waiting

377

doesn't mean your life is just on hold.

378

Like you're just like waiting

for your life to start.

379

That's not it.

380

It's like the fact that like.

381

Your life today is, your life

today, and how you approach your

382

life today is going to shape your

life every day, one day at a time.

383

And that is how we have decided to

live our state of life right now.

384

I could sit here and feel like I'm so

behind and wallow and hate my life and

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compare myself to literally every single

one of my friends, except for maybe

386

one or two that aren't moms right now.

387

And it would make me absolutely.

388

Miserable, or my husband and I could

thank the Lord every single day for the

389

blessings that he's given us, for the

joy and the beautiful marriage that we

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have for our home, for our family, for

our friends, for our community, for

391

all of the good things, and we could.

392

Take all that and just live life to

the fullest and just ask the Lord,

393

what are you asking of me today?

394

What are you asking of me right now?

395

What?

396

How are you shaping my heart and

my life and my home and my marriage

397

in this moment in preparation for

the next, not in this like pause or

398

waiting for my life to start, but

like my life is living right now.

399

So what are you doing

to shape it right now?

400

So that future Mari is who

you want her to be, Lord.

401

Right?

402

So I just wanted to share that and

share the grass is always gonna

403

be greener on the other side.

404

And one thing Trey said to me

recently is like, there's always

405

gonna be someone doing something

more amazing and someone doing

406

something better than you or whatever.

407

And just being fixated on their

life and how they're doing things

408

and their accomplishments is.

409

Only gonna make your life more miserable.

410

And, um, don't get me wrong, I absolutely

struggle with comparison as well.

411

And to be completely honest, I think it,

it didn't hit me for a really long time.

412

I think a lot of women struggled

with comparison from a young age,

413

but recently, in the past few

years, it's hit me a lot just in my.

414

Just social media, if I'm just being

honest, which I know might sound crazy

415

to people 'cause they're like, what?

416

This is your job.

417

Your content's awesome.

418

But like I'm very self-critical and

I look at my feed and I look at my

419

content all the time and I'm always

like, Trey, like, is my stuff even good?

420

Like hers was so much better.

421

Hers, hers was so much more creative.

422

Hers was so much more aesthetic.

423

Her feed's so much better.

424

Her ideas are so much more fun and

entertaining and creative or whatever.

425

So I mean, I struggle with that too.

426

And I think all of us know

our own weaknesses and can

427

recognize our own hearts like.

428

What it is that specifically

we struggle with.

429

What part of comparison

do we struggle with?

430

And my encouragement and to myself, right?

431

And to all of you, is take that to

prayer, take that to the Lord and ask

432

him to cultivate in you a heart of faith.

433

Of hope and of surrender,

especially of surrender.

434

That's just been like the biggest thing

that he's taught me over the years is

435

the more I surrender my life to him,

the more I surrender my will to him, the

436

more I begin to embody his will and my

life begins to be shaped by his will.

437

And surprise surprise, his plan brings

so much more joy than I thought mine did.

438

Um.

439

And that's what I was saying in this post,

which is like absolutely crazy to say.

440

And I think Mari, two years ago,

or three years ago in the early

441

years of infertility would've

literally hated to hear me say this.

442

But like I look at the past five years

and everything that has happened,

443

and I know so many of those things

would not have unfolded if I was

444

busy with one or two kids by now.

445

And so it's weird to say,

but it's kind of like.

446

I'm grateful.

447

It's kind of like, Lord, thank you

for giving us this cross in this

448

time, because we wouldn't have lived

what we had the past five years.

449

Like we had a heart of openness

to life and family and just like

450

we were so fresh in our marriage

and we're like, okay, Lord.

451

Like bring on the babies.

452

Do whatever you want.

453

And if you're in that stage, it's

beautiful and it's beautiful to see

454

young families develop like that.

455

But I'm also.

456

So obsessed with how the Lord has shaped

our life, and I'm also so grateful

457

for what he has brought into our life.

458

And it wouldn't have happened if

we had multiple kids right now.

459

I know that.

460

And so it is weird to say I'm thankful

for the Lord's plan unfolding in a

461

way that was different than mine.

462

And so keep that in mind.

463

And what I always tell myself is like,

I know Future me is gonna look back.

464

I hope she looks back with gratitude and

I hope she looks back with awe and I look,

465

hope she looks back with admiration at

Younger Mari for how she grappled with

466

and coped and lived out these years in

a place where I could have felt like,

467

gosh, like I should be somewhere else,

but I'm not, instead of wallowing in that.

468

How she just took every single day

as it was and tried to do everything

469

to the fullest with the most joy

and my best effort, and just always

470

trying to do the Lord's well in

anything, um, that he's calling me to.

471

And.

472

So as we wrap up here, I just

wanna say like, one of the things

473

I said in this last post was,

be generous with your yeses.

474

And that was, I think,

something Trey taught me.

475

He always just taught me to be generous

to the Lord with what he calls you

476

to do and how you respond to him.

477

And so, like Mary said, yes, in her

fiat at the Annunciation and how she

478

just gave the Lord everything in a

moment of uncertainty and not knowing.

479

Like we can do that in our life

in little ways and in big ways,

480

like over and over and over again.

481

And it's never too much and you'll

never regret being generous to the Lord.

482

So when you feel him call you

to do something, just say yes.

483

And that fear that you have that hesitancy

of like, what if I can't do it, or what

484

if it's not good as someone else, or.

485

Whatever, like just give

that all to the Lord.

486

'cause he's gonna prepare you.

487

He's gonna fill you with the graces

that you need and every moment that

488

He calls you to something, in every

way that he wants to shape your life

489

today, right now, and what he's calling

you to do right now, he's gonna give

490

you everything you need to do that.

491

So you just need to

come with an open heart.

492

And a posture of surrender.

493

Um, and just ask for more faith.

494

Ask for more faith in him

because that surrender won't come

495

unless you have faith in him.

496

And faith is literally a gift

that we cannot manifest ourselves.

497

We cannot create it ourselves.

498

It's just a gift given by the Lord.

499

So ask for it every single day.

500

Ask for more faith.

501

And it all kind of ties in together.

502

It's like the more you ask for faith,

the more you're able to surrender.

503

And the more you do both of those,

the more hope you have and hope.

504

Brings joy, like hope brings

joy and truly, like I ask

505

for these gifts all the time.

506

I ask for a greater posture of surrender.

507

I ask for greater faith, and I ask for

to, for my hope to be strengthened.

508

And it's, it's crazy.

509

Even after five years of never seeing a

positive, positive pregnancy test every

510

single month, I'm like positive I'm gonna

see one just because I trust the Lord.

511

Just because I have hope in him.

512

Just because I think like.

513

He can do anything.

514

And so maybe he'll choose to

give us this gift this month.

515

Um, and you know, some might

be like, that's pretty stupid.

516

And maybe it is.

517

Maybe it's not even like

scientifically accurate at this point.

518

I don't know.

519

But.

520

But I have hope and it all ties together

that hope, that faith, that surrender

521

it all, it all plays off of each other.

522

And so if you're in a place in your

life where you feel like comparison

523

is heavy, you're looking around and

you see another woman's life and

524

you want her life instead of yours.

525

ask for greater surrender, faith,

and hope, um, to combat those

526

lies, to combat those temptations.

527

Because wanting to be her, wishing to be

her and even trying to be her is not gonna

528

get you the happiness you think at all.

529

You don't wanna be her.

530

You wanna be you.

531

You wanna be exactly who God made

you to be, and by wishing to be

532

her, you're literally stifling.

533

Yourself.

534

You're literally stifling the woman God

created, and you're getting farther away

535

from being who you're supposed to be.

536

So.

537

That's my love letter to you.

538

And wow, you got a lot, you got

some heartfelt talks, you got

539

some inspirational Ted Talk vibes,

some hard truth, big sister talks,

540

and just some vulnerability.

541

So I hope that that just cut

straight to the heart today.

542

Maybe it was what you needed to hear.

543

Maybe it's what your

friend needed to hear.

544

If you know someone who's

struggling with this, send it

545

her way, please, um, and share.

546

Share this message with her.

547

And yeah, that's all

I've got for y'all today.

548

So hopefully that was, that was good.

549

Um, we'll wrap it up with some ever

be answers, and then I'll catch

550

all of you who are part of the

Kingdom Club at the after party.

551

mari-wagner_3_04-01-2026_132724: So as

always, I'll answer a question here and

552

then two questions at the after party.

553

So here are the questions today.

554

Um, I picked this one 'cause

it was fitting just the timing

555

of everything somebody asked.

556

You and Trey have mentioned

that you're both going to

557

Mexico for re to learn Spanish.

558

Mari, I'm curious as to what

your experience was like

559

learning Spanish growing up.

560

Are you fluent in Spanish?

561

Did you have to learn it through school?

562

For example?

563

I'm half Mexican, but since I

grew up here in the US I didn't.

564

But I didn't learn Spanish from my mom.

565

Instead, I had to learn it through

school because my siblings and,

566

and I grew up learning English.

567

So I'll answer that one

here on the podcast.

568

Um, and then the ones that

will answer at the after party.

569

What is a goal that you and Trey hope

to accomplish together in the future?

570

It could be personal, professional,

related to your marriage, et cetera.

571

And one of my favorite ways to pray

the rosary is while listening to it on.

572

Recording to keep me on track.

573

Would you ever consider doing a

couple podcast episodes of you seeing

574

the Rosary for people to pray along

with especially the Seven Sorrows

575

Rosary since you released that one?

576

And I have some fun ideas and

stuff to share on that one.

577

So all that will be in

the after party, but.

578

Let's chat about this first one.

579

So yes, I mean, at this point, I've

talked about it so many times, so y'all

580

know we went to Mexico for a month.

581

The reason we went there was for Trey

to do a Spanish immersion program.

582

We did a week of vacation and then

three weeks of him at the program.

583

So that's how he was learning Spanish.

584

So then they're asking, what was my

experience learning Spanish growing up?

585

So.

586

I grew up here in the us um,

surrounded by English, but my family

587

is a hundred percent Colombian and

I was actually born in Columbia, so

588

I was born in Bogota, Colombia, and

I moved to the US when I was three.

589

My parents were really young and they

had spent their entire lives living in

590

Columbia, like my parents were 23 and 25,

I think, when they moved to the us and so.

591

Imagine like, yeah, like they're

like fully fluent in Spanish

592

and that's their main language.

593

They both learned English in school.

594

Actually.

595

My dad learned a little bit English

in school, but he actually learned

596

the rest when he got here to the us.

597

Um, so anyways, so our home was

always a Spanish speaking home.

598

Um, and I think the fact that I grew

up in Columbia, my first three years

599

of life, that did a lot for me because

those are the formative years when.

600

Little kids are learning languages.

601

So I think just having only Spanish be the

only language that I heard for the first

602

three years of my life probably did a lot.

603

And then moving to the states and having

my home be a hundred percent a hate

604

Spanish household for a really long time.

605

Also did a lot like.

606

We never spoke English at home until

probably my sister got to speaking age,

607

because what happened was that us as

siblings, there's three kids in my family,

608

my little sister, my little brother

and I, and we would all try and speak

609

in English probably more to each other

than we spoke in Spanish and even today.

610

We kind of only speak to

each other in English.

611

Uh, not only, but I would say like

probably 90% in English and then

612

10% will just kind of like throw

Spanish in there when it just makes

613

sense to say something in Spanish.

614

Um, but with my parents

it was always in Spanish.

615

And given that.

616

I, my little sister wasn't

born until I was five.

617

Now there's five years of

only speaking Spanish at home.

618

And then let's say she didn't really

start talking until she was like,

619

what, like two, so that's like

seven years of only Spanish at home.

620

And then when she starts talking, like

we're just teaching her Spanish, so she's

621

not really learning English till later.

622

So anyways, my family home environment

was pretty much a hundred percent

623

Spanish for a lot of my childhood.

624

And then when we got older, like.

625

Older, middle school, high school, and

we had obviously at that point been in

626

school in the US for like our entire

lives, and so most of our day is in

627

English, and so we're coming home to a

completely Spanish environment, which is

628

kind of annoying as a kid, like you're.

629

Initial, like you're just like

automatic, like tendency as a

630

human is to do what's easiest.

631

Right.

632

And what was easiest was to speak English.

633

'cause I had been

speaking English all day.

634

So I would come home and just wanna speak

English to my family and my parents.

635

And my parents would literally

like not let us, like they

636

would force us to speak Spanish.

637

They'd be like, I don't

understand what you're saying.

638

And that's, that was a lie because

they're both fully fluent in English.

639

Like they know what I'm saying.

640

But they just wanted to

keep our Spanish really.

641

Fluent.

642

And so they would say, I

don't know what you're saying.

643

Like you can't, you know, if I'm like

asking for something, they're like,

644

if you wanna have it, you have to

ask for me in Spanish, or you have to

645

like tell me in Spanish or whatever.

646

They like really pushed us to

express ourselves in Spanish

647

so that we would not lose that.

648

And as a teenager I absolutely hated that.

649

Like I literally was like,

you guys are so annoying.

650

You guys are so intense.

651

You guys are so strict.

652

Why can't you just blah, blah,

blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

653

Right.

654

Just classic teenage.

655

Tantrums, but as an adult now, I'm

so grateful that they made us speak

656

Spanish because I know so many people

whose family, you know, are Hispanic

657

and they have that Hispanic culture,

um, within their family, or maybe

658

they're half Hispanic or whatever,

but they don't speak any Spanish and.

659

I totally understand, like if you grew

up in the US and your parents didn't

660

make you speak Spanish, like when and

how would you have ever learned Spanish?

661

Or how would you like be able

to like really be fluent or even

662

have like a good Spanish accent?

663

Um, so I'm really grateful to my parents

now for making us do all that because

664

that's how I learned Spanish and.

665

I mean, over the years, like we

go back to Columbia, we visit

666

our family, we fly our family out

here to visit us and everything.

667

And my entire family back in Columbia,

they don't really speak English.

668

Like I have one aunt that speaks English.

669

That's basically it.

670

Like all my grandparents and aunts and

uncles, like, they basically all speak

671

Spanish and that's it, so, so you don't

really have a choice, so you kinda

672

just have to talk to them in Spanish.

673

And then also I think like my parents',

family, friends, all of our closest family

674

friends growing up were all Hispanic.

675

So I grew up around.

676

Mostly Hispanic friends, like in the

family, friends sense in high school.

677

Um, not high school, sorry, like

in school, all my friends were

678

pretty much American, um, or Asian.

679

There's a lot of, there's a lot of

cultures up in the, up in Washington

680

Pacific Northwest, but a lot of

Asian Indian, and then just like

681

white people, um, American and.

682

But my family's closest friends, so

like who I would consider my cousins,

683

the people I spent Thanksgiving,

Christmas, Easter with, like, instead

684

of our aunts and uncles and cousins

because all of our family's family

685

friends as families, they were all

in their, their Hispanic countries.

686

Like we would spend all

those holidays together.

687

So they basically became

my extended family.

688

So that also helped as like I was around

Spanish speaking families all the time.

689

Um, and so that culture is like

really ingrained in me and it's just

690

hilarious because I'm able to really

live both cultures really well.

691

Growing up in the US and having a

bunch of English speaking American

692

friends and everything, it was like,

it formed me in one way, but then

693

having kind of like my central family

unit and extended family friends.

694

All be Hispanic.

695

Really solidified that

Hispanic culture in me as well.

696

So I really have both, um, and can

really meld into both cultures really

697

easily, which is a gift and it's awesome.

698

And it's also kind of

weird sometimes, but.

699

Yeah, that's, that's pretty much my story.

700

And we really, I really wanna give

that same gift to our future kids.

701

I want them to be a hundred

percent fluent Spanish.

702

I want them to sound like

good Hispanic, good Spanish

703

accent when they speak Spanish.

704

And be able to like, be completely

fluent in English and sound

705

American when they speak English.

706

Um, because I think it's just so valuable.

707

So we'll be doing that

for our kiddos too, but.

708

That's that, and we'll get to the

other two questions at the after party.

709

So now officially signing

off, we'll see you next week.