In this episode of BEP Talks, I sat down with Quinn Cashion, a therapeutic transformational coach who works with neurodivergent professionals – especially women and moms – to find true balance in their lives. We explored what neurodivergence really means, how labels can be limiting, and the importance of understanding your own operating system to thrive in your career and your relationships. Quinn shared practical wisdom on bridging spirituality and psychology, staying aligned with your true self, and finding joy in both personal and professional life. If you’re ready for deeper fulfillment, this conversation is a must-listen.

Visit Quinn's website ... www.quinncashion.com

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Well,

welcome to this edition of BEP Talks, where it's all

about beliefs, experiences, and passions

shared with you by people from all around

the world, from different industries and professions, different stages of their

career path, what have you, but all here to share their

wisdom, education, inspire you,

motivate you, educate you, maybe even just to entertain you,

but to share a deep part of themselves with you.

And that is the beauty of Bev Talks, where we talk about

beliefs, experiences, and passions. Today, certainly, well, we never

have an exception. Every guest is so wonderful. Today's guest,

certainly no exception. Our very special guest today is a

therapeutic transformational coach, which we're gonna get deep

into what all of that means, who works with

neurodivergent professionals. Need to know

more about that word. Mostly with women, moms,

who I guess have the appearance of being

very successful on the outside and probably are successful,

But something's missing on the inside. And Quinn works with

them to bring them back into that good balance.

And here to talk to us about exactly how she does that is

today's guest. Please welcome Quinn Basham.

Hello. Hi, Quinn. How are you? Yeah, we had a little

thunder there, little thunder and lightning. How are you today, my friend? I'm

doing so well. Thank you for the invitation. I'm looking forward to our

conversation. So am I, because one of the things, I love

so many things about Bep Talks, mostly meeting wonderful people

like yourself. And I do learn every single conversation

I have, I learn. And you're gonna start teaching me

now. What is a

neurodivergent woman?

Well, you know, our brain, we have, our brains are fascinating.

And I think more recently, brain studies,

they're noticing different brain types, and

neurodivergent is a type of brain that functions a certain

way that's different from what they call neurotypical brains.

So neurodivergence kind of focuses in on certain areas.

It's almost like all their brain power goes into

what they're good at, you know. They have this genius

gifts, and there's a— there's definitely a continuum of

neurodivergence, but the people that I work with are at one

end of the spectrum that are, you know, they function super well

in the workplace, they are great to have around. I mean,

they're amazing leaders, they, they just get

so much done so quickly, but

sometimes they struggle with relationships, the emotional

state A lot of times they go into high anxiety

or depression. They have to do some masking, which

I find we all do at some level, right? We're all masking, but

they have a heightened awareness of that. Their

sensory system, so anything

from sight, smell, taste,

touch, hear, can be very heightened, and

everyone's different as to what that would be for them. For some people,

they can't stand bright light. Others, it's

sound. They can't be in a place that has— that's

very noisy. So some clients that I work with that are in

the sort of career side of things, they have to wear a

headset just so that the noise is calmer for them.

Oh, this is the term neurodivergent. Has

that been around forever? Is it newer in

today's sciences?

Autism is kind of what they talk about, so

neurodivergent can be ADHD, autism, those

are the ones that are sort of the common ones that are

recognized. And so it's really about how do

you work with the brain you've been given, you know, and I think that goes

across all of us and how do we

function in our day-to-day, in our our careers, in

our relationships, in our health and our well-being. And

a lot of times we can get really off track from that.

And so, so that's the work that I do is I really get people to

tap back into that inner resource that they forget

about because we're so focused on the outside

world of performing, of achieving, of getting things done, and

that the inner side is kind of in turmoil.

World out there, 9 to 5, isn't it? So you

said autism, which the word that came to my mind right away was

the spectrum. Is neurodivergency, if that's the

right word, is it part of the spectrum? It is. Yes,

it is. So is there a way to diagnose it

or is it just behavioral? Is it just outward behavioral that

it becomes like kind of a Oh,

how many boxes you check that fit in that category that

you now are believed to be neurodivergent, or is there

really a scientific way to diagnose it? There is.

There are some assessments, and, you know, I've heard of people getting

assessments in their 60s. You know, they're just noticing this pattern,

and they finally go and get some testing done, and it kind of

validates what they already know. And I think any diagnoses when

it comes to mental health is it just kind

of validates kind of where you're at in that moment, but it's

not who you are. And that's the important

thing that I want to share. It doesn't matter what is going

on and what diagnoses you get. It's not who

you are. And that's the important piece because we

can get so gripped and caught up in a diagnosis

and. Labels. Yeah.

Putting kids even— I remember years ago, it's not all that

long ago. I mean, it's recent history. What was the

drug, Ritalin, that so many kids were given because of

behavioral observations

on being kind that teachers believed they had kids who were

fiddling around and maybe they were just bored, maybe they were divergent

and were given It was

Ritalin, right? Am I correct in remembering that that's the drug that these children

were given and that it kind of calmed

them down so the teacher didn't have to deal with them? But then the child,

the student at tender ages, very sad. They knew that others

didn't expect a lot of them, so they stopped expecting a lot of

themselves. So back to neurodivergence, when you

say that people can be diagnosed Is it

something that— is it progressive? Is it something that

manifests itself experientially,

or are you born with it, with that

type of a brain? Yeah, most of the time— well,

depends on who you're researching,

because some people believe that we're born with it.

Certain people are born with it. Other people that are currently

discussing how vaccines can trigger that.

So so that's— yeah, at the end of the day, it's really about what kind

of brain I have to work with. If I'm noticing, if my

parents are noticing, if I'm a younger person that I'm not making

friends or, easily, you know, they're being bullied in the

playground more often, if they're more

focused on certain activities versus others, it's really

about the adults that surround them that really have to

support their gifts. I mean, I remember watching

America's Got Talent. I love that show. And this

fellow, I can't remember his name offhand right at the moment,

but he, he couldn't speak. He could barely speak to the

judges. His mom came out with him

on stage and spoke to the judges for him, but he

came to sing and play piano. And he was

phenomenal. Oh, I know who you're talking about. He

was— if we're thinking— he was, I'm going to say, profoundly

autistic. Yes. And yet

had this talent, this God-given gift.

Yes. Do you find— is that a pattern?

No. Everyone's different, you know, and that's where I don't want to get

too caught up on sort of that. It's kind of looking at

how we all operate. We all have an operating system within

us, and it's like, how do we take that operating system and

optimize it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So some of my

clients that are having those challenges in the classroom, like you

were talking about, they couldn't sit still in the classroom. I had one class

because I developed a resilience manual for elementary

schools, and so I was going in and teaching kids in the classroom,

and at the time, the focus of the work

was helping kids not get

caught up in eating disorders because that was sort of the

mandate of this project. But I knew going into a

classroom that you would have different types of brains, you would

have anxiety and depression and bullying and all kinds of

other issues going on. So going underneath all

of that and strengthening the core of who we are as

humans will help these symptoms go

away or get less. How wonderful to

know that that opportunity exists,

that something can be done. And like anything else, I guess

we say early diagnosis, if that's the right term to say,

but take whatever information you have

and use it the most powerful way

that you can to become the best, or to help, in your case,

someone else to become the best that they can. Do you work mostly with— well,

no, you don't work mostly with children, I'm going to guess, because it says that

you work with very successful women professionals and

moms. Yes. So, well, this project

got me into the school system, and so I was actually developing a

curriculum to work with educators. But what

happened is, like, I wanted to create the curriculum, but I also

wanted to see how it worked in the classroom. So I went in and

a lot of work with kids, which I really enjoyed

because the curriculum, and that's where the educational system

for me gets really stuck, is because

they have the curriculum on social-emotional learning

of all of these things, and yet if

the teacher is not able to create an

environment through their own state of mind

where children can thrive, then there's a real

disconnect. So, you know, I remember one

province was spending a lot of money on well-being in the

classroom. And so they were coming up with strategies, techniques, you

know, teachers standing at the door and greeting their kids in the morning. Well, if

a teacher is stressed out, burnt out, had a bad morning already,

that hello is not going to land very well. It makes.

Sense. Yeah. Yeah. So recognizing how state of mind

is fluid, it's up and down all the time. If

we can recognize that, even in the children that are in our

classroom, then it makes it a little easier to create an

environment that's safe to sort of move

through the upset instead of punishing someone for what they—

Yes. Yes. You didn't understand what it was as the

teacher or the supervisor. Listen, anything that

anybody can do. In. The, or for the

early stages in, during the early stages of life in elementary school,

as we would call it here in the United States, grammar school,

the lower grades that can put somebody on a better

path. And I don't mean better that they become a better person, but a better

path for them. To your point, based on what it is that

they are dealing with, whatever the brain is, you

know, that's only fair. Listen, it's never been easy to be a kid. It's

never been easy to be, not easy to be a teacher either, but never been

easy to be a child. And especially these days, there's just

so much, there's just so much energy

and it's not always good. There's so much influence that

comes to them and how they deal with it. And then how

when each child goes home and how the adults, the

older people, we'll call them adults, deal with those

same issues and what that kid brings back and has influence on

other children's.

It's not easy. It's not easy. Well, and it

can't be easy. And that's the thing. Oh, wonderful. Good

news. Because if we don't understand the operating

system, our brain, our mind, if we don't understand it

well enough, it takes us for a ride. You know, we

get impacted by the outside world all the time. And

so I remember when my children were young and said, well, you know, Sally

wasn't very nice to me. And it's like, instead of making Sally wrong,

or if she bullied— it was the language that they used— it's like,

I wonder what's up with Sally. I wonder what's going on. I hope

she's okay. Yeah, yeah. You know, now if that pattern

happened for a couple of times, then, then yeah, I have to look

into it further. But it's really about how can we just

recognize some people have low moods And some people

act from their low moods. And where we want to get to is I

can have a low mood, but I don't have to act on it. It depends

on everybody else that, you know, especially for a teacher,

that's really hard. And they have to deal with so many different personalities.

You use the word bully, and I don't like

bullies.

Is there a pattern from the child who

starts bullying early on that

what I've observed— never was bullied, never allowed

people to bully other people in my presence.

I was kind of that person who shut it down, but

started to realize trends. I really started to see that it

was the insecurity of some. And I would say even to adults, if

making someone else feel— to make someone else

feel inferior is what makes you feel better about

yourself, That's a

strange way to comport yourself.

Well, we can look at this a lot of different ways.

So the state of insecurity— when I drop in my

mood, I go into my insecurity. So everybody's different as to

what they do in their insecurity. For some people, they'll bully. Some

people will become a victim. Some people will create

violence. Some, you know, We all do something, we yell or get

angry at other people. So everybody does their thing,

what they've learned over the years when they're in the low

state. So the fact that a bully and a victim

can be in that low state of thinking, because like

you said, it's like, well, I was never bullied, but maybe you were, but you

stood your ground. Like you knew how to take care of yourself, right? So,

so the victim, you want them to get into a

higher state where they're able to deal with that energy

that's coming at them that's negative.

And so what I found with working with young people

is those that were bullies were

phenomenal leaders. They had, they

had a skill within them

to know how to lead. They just didn't know how to use it

properly. So it's an energy, you know,

everything's energy in my mind. So emotions, are your emotions energy?

So When a bully, you know, they know how to get people on their

side. They know how to, you know, they know how to do things, but they

don't know how to use it properly because they haven't been trained

or they have family members or people in their home environment

that's demonstrated, well, the way to get your own way is to do it this

way. Right. Repeat behavior, right,

right. Wow. Gosh, there's so much to

know. So you're talking a lot about children and it must

be so satisfying to work with children and know that you

can impact their lives,

even one life, in a very positive way,

to give them more security, more confidence, a

better direction, to be understood better

by other people. That has to be such a

satisfying experience for you.

Working with Successful female

entrepreneurs. Is

there a contradiction in that? In that it's your, your,

okay, female will say maybe that's part of it. I

don't know. Maybe it's more common among females than

males. You're a successful entrepreneur. You have

all the outward signs of it, and yet you don't feel

good about yourself when you're not on the job,

you're not in touch with really what you're supposed to be doing and

who you really are. How does that kind of— sounds like a phenomenon.

Well, it has been. Yeah, I think we all wear our masks.

Talking about masking earlier, we all have a mask, we have an

image, we have a brand that we're putting out into the world, and it's, it's

like How in

alignment am I with that brand? And

for me, it's really about the calmer I am on the

inside, it's easier to project that outwards.

So being anxious or stressed or overwhelmed, you know, those,

we think those are somewhat normal, but at the end of the day,

if it's, if you're not enjoying the moment that you're in,

in that conversation you're having with that one client or that one

person, It's like, it's great you're getting the

money and you're getting that success, but the feeling underneath that is—

and it's coming back to the holistic

approach to mental health in my mind. It's really about,

you know, my relationship's healthy. Am I

feeling at ease with myself instead of feeling

discomfort and dis-ease? You know, is— am

I enjoying the life that I'm creating for myself? So is that—

well, it is suggesting to me then that there can be,

I imagine this is true, two sides to everybody. We're

not, none of us are perfect. But

how do I say this? To feel,

to be recognized by any definition of being

an accomplished, successful person, we'll say a

female entrepreneur, and yet to feel lacking

yourself, that bit of contradiction Is

there something that causes

that imbalance that seems somewhat natural? Because

you can't be on all the time. You can't be playing that, that

strong, successful female entrepreneur 24/7,

365. Is it somewhat of a defense mechanism that

you lower your own mood,

your own behavior, because you need to create that balance?

So that you can go back there on the 9-to-5 side and be that strong

person? Yeah, it gets exhausting after a while. Would It

have to be. It would have to be. Yes. When we're not in alignment with

who we really are, it gets exhausting over time. And

so the body starts to, you know, starts to knock on

the door and going, I need your attention. I need your attention.

So that's one way of it showing up. Dynamics

in your home environment. You know, if you're always stressed and

overwhelmed and you're coming home to your kids and, you know,

their behavior's out of sorts, so it's more of a screaming

match than, hey, what's going on? Can I give you a hug? You know,

bringing in that love and that connection that

is so critical when we're raising our children.

So yeah, that's, that's a key part. And so

with women, I really like working with moms as well because

because of the work I've done with children, and and I— it doesn't matter what

age your kids are at, it's about that relationship, it's about

that connection, and how do I hold on to that connection

in a loving, kind, clear way

that allows them to become independent? Yeah,

let them thrive, but also maintain your own

wellness, because it's so easy to put it Second,

sure. What cost to yourself when you're serving

everybody else and doing the job as the successful female

entrepreneur? At what cost to yourself? And

then you don't want to go home and take it out on your children.

And so it's kind of a chicken and an egg thing here. I'm

saying it can be. And, you know, and it's not just entrepreneurs. I mean,

you look at anyone, like you were saying earlier, teachers. Like, whoa, you

know, the amount of work they have to put into a classroom and perform,

and then they have to come home and take care of their own kids, and

they have to do, you know, test scores or whatever.

Yeah, so I think anyone who has a

life outside of the home as well, it's

a lot of energy that is output. And so

what kind of— how do we refill our cup, you know? How do we

maintain that, or how do we maintain the cup full

in our day, you know? It's like, is it possible

for us to keep our cup full during the day? I mean, I

think it is possible. I've noticed some days when I can do

that really well, it's like, all right. And other days it's like, oh man,

you're human. Yeah, yeah. I remember there was a

story years ago, I wish I— it just came to mind, about a man

coming home from work a busy day, a stressful day,

and before he would walk in his house, he would

stop and hang his troubles, his complaints on

the tree so he didn't bring them into the house with him

and take it out on his children and his wife and whatever, so that he

can enjoy that part of his family life and

be a good supportive husband and dad.

And the vision of it, if you will, is that

when he would be leaving the next day, he would want to take

the problems off the tree and take them back to the office.

But that when he passed the tree, he realized there was nothing

there to take. That what you think, if you can just

release it, let it go— and I might be oversimplifying, but that image

came to mind— is that sometimes just.

Yes, actually, I speak

in metaphors all the time because it's so important. Because we

can't see the brain, we can't understand how the mind works.

It's so abstract. And so be able to bring it into

form so that we can understand a little bit more. That's

a really good example of letting go of a

thought. You know, he just just hung all those thoughts

that didn't— he didn't need going into the house. And

how beautiful is that? And so you come back out in the morning,

it's like, oh, they're not there anymore, you know. So

the wisdom— wisdom, yeah. So when we

talk about

divergent personalities, is that— or divergent

brains, is that— I want to say it the right way. Yeah, I, you know,

and there's so many different definitions out there, and then I I think for me

and with the clients that I've worked with, they're

just a beautiful soul and they just have a noisy head, you

know, lots of noise in the head. And so, and I think

we all have that to some degree and some of them

it's to a point where it's very, more

intense, I guess. Yeah, it's a range

in neurodivergency

from, well, mild to really critical?

Well, as you— as we shared about the man that

was saying on America's Got

Talent, you know, he was definitely at the end, right? And so others

that are at the other end are high-functioning. You wouldn't know.

You wouldn't know. They are very skilled and they figured

things out. They're You know, I think

Elon Musk is an example that somebody who's on the spectrum,

you know, highly functioning. But

does he have things in his life that he could be better with? Probably.

Also Zuckerberg, also on that

spectrum. So maybe you start to think that those very active brains,

it's that their brains are knocking because there's so much

going on up there. They are so brilliant. It's so fascinating because as you

say, the human brain We can't see it. We can only

observe, I guess, the behaviors of people. And I don't want to say

categorize. Them, but— well, and that's the thing that I

stay away from is labels, because

labels are for clothes, they're not for humans, right?

And so, but if we're more aware

of how I show up in certain situations,

then I know where I need to do my work. You know, if I notice

that I'm in these kinds of environments and I shut down, or

I talk too much, or, you know, I'm feeling like I

have to mask all the time, then it's like, okay, how can I do it

differently? And so then we start figuring those things out.

But if our inner compass is strong

and we understand the core of who we are is strong,

then we're able to manage our behaviors in any situation.

You know, I might have a low day one day and, you know, and I

don't talk much, but I'm okay with that because at the core

I know who I am and I'm all right with that. You know,

versus getting worried and I'm anxious and I get overwhelmed

and, you know, then we go down that rabbit hole. And so

then it's like, then we beat ourselves up and then we think we always

need some medications instead of. Going, well, maybe I just

need to. Go for a walk. Maybe I just need to go and watch the

sunset. Maybe I'll put on my favorite music. Things like that.

Yeah, those are nice diversions.

And I don't mean to connect diversion to neurodiversity—

neurodivergent, rather. You bridge— I read in your

bio that you bridge spirituality and psychology,

and I found that fascinating. I didn't I thought, wow,

are those things opposing

thought patterns, beliefs, whatever— spirituality

and psychology, how do they come together?

Mm, great question. Love that question. I'm actually just currently

writing a book about that. Oh yeah, so

we are spiritual beings having a human experience.

Love it. The more we can understand that spiritual element

of who we are, you know, it's peaceful, it's loving,

it's graceful, it's

I'm okay with being in the unknown. I'm, you

know, we just create from this beautiful place. And so

the feeling, it's always a feeling. We always know

spiritually when we're in alignment with our higher self, our

truer self, with God, whoever that is for you.

When we're in alignment, it feels really nice. Yeah, peace.

It's kind of It's quiet. quiet on the inside. When I'm thinking

spirituality and psychology, is that the union,

the balance, the coming together

of the, the body and the

soul, in a sense? The body being the brain, the soul being the inner spirit.

And that if and when we can be well

aligned with that, we can have that peace.

And yeah, so I look at spirituality

as a power source. It's universal

intelligence. It's God.

We have that ability to tap into that source.

And we know when we do. The wisdom comes, the gut feeling

comes, the intuition. Is there.

So we know when we tap into that in any given

moment, you know. The result of tapping. I know for me, when I do tap

into it, and there's times I go, I need to, you know, I'll pray out

loud or something, ask for something,

it does kind of bring you back down into— and then not all

about me. Yeah, yeah. So that's where wisdom speaks to you.

So that's wisdom, that at the core of our

Spiritual essence is wisdom, and so that's a really good

example of tapping into that innate part of who

you are. Yeah, psychology, um,

when we align psychology, when our thinking mind

aligns with, with mind or, um, the

inner essence, the compass, whatever you want to call it, um,

it flows really well. So the personal thinking mind is not

chattering, it's not going a mile a minute. I don't have 27

folders open on my, you know, in my operating

system. I just have one and it's really aligned and I feel like

I'm in a flow instead of, you know, moving all over. I gotta

do this, I gotta do that. So it gets, you know, so that's the difference

that when we can connect these two,

life flows a lot easier. There's gonna be so much

harmony when, if and when you can connect them. What

can somebody, can somebody do something consciously to bring

themselves into that state? Like, if you observe

you're nervous, you're, like you say,

moving from here to there, you know, your attention deficits, what have you.

Is there something that we can do to calm ourselves

and to bring ourselves into focus,

let's say, and become mindful that there's a conflict here?

What's going on here? What's going on here? What's going on here?

Are kind of fighting each other. Well, and, and that's where

we, we want to get into alignment and not fighting. So

if we're living life from the outside in— you made me

you angry, know, work is you horrible, know,

everything on the outside world is causing me

to feel upset, to feel anxious, to feel angry—

if you shift that paradigm around and Right.

Where I— same scenario, what's going on out there,

but it's how I'm going to look at it that day. You know, if my

mood's low, yeah, I'm going to get angry about that or

upset about that or overwhelmed. If I'm in a high state of

mind, oh yeah, I didn't see that coming. Yeah.

Hey, I just— I need 5 minutes here or I need a

day to sort of think about this because I'm not quite sure how to handle

this right now. A balance

or a relationship between cause and effect.

Like, you can have a trigger. There are certain people that can trigger— I know

certain emotions in me that,

you know, are truly triggered by

that person. Let's say

I didn't bring it to them, they brought it out of me. And I don't

want to look like, you know, I don't let anybody make me a victim, but

The saying, it's like 90% of life is

10% of what happens to you and 90%

of how you respond to what happens to you, like a

cause and effect. Yeah, so we can have a reaction or a

response. So even though, you know, let's

say somebody's had a trauma from childhood and it's still in their nervous

system, so let's just say it was somebody, you know, their

dad was always angry at them. And so anybody in their

current world who use that tone of voice,

they might get triggered, right? But the

more grounded they are, the more that they can,

they understand the operating system behind what's coming at

them. They'll start to see, oh, well, that, you know, it's like a

bee sting. I call them bee stings, you know, and it's like,

oh yeah, I could feel that. But then I know how to let it go

because I don't let it bother me because it's just a word.

Somebody just said something. I don't let it bother me. I can

respond to that. I could set a boundary to that if necessary.

So there's lots of things that would occur to me in that

moment. And again, that comes back to the

spiritual side of it because you're then you're talking about your wisdom.

Okay, whoa, you know what? This is not a good time for me to talk

to that person or 'Or, you know, let's go

for a walk and have that talk,' because you felt more at ease

doing that. So you will find ways to

support your well-being first.

It's like the— you were saying earlier, you know, keep that cup full.

Yes. So that you have more to continue to give

positively to other people. What's the process

by which people work with you? How— and we'll put that information

below this of how people can be in touch with you. Just talk briefly

about the process of someone

who goes to work with you, who wants to become a client. Is it that

they feel something's missing, something's lacking? I want more, I need more, I

deserve more. How does that begin? Yeah, so

working as a therapist, I get all of kinds types of clients coming in.

You just— they're just feeling a disconnection in their relationships. It could be

with their partner, it could be with their kids, it could

be relationship friendships that are out of sorts,

especially for the younger kids, younger children that I work

with. So it really varies.

Everybody's quite different when they come to me. But with my

programs that I'm offering now, it's really about let's

understand this operating system because you're

You're successful, you're showing up to life really well, and

you're not feeling at ease on the inside. So let's

get you back to feeling at ease while you're still

creating the life that you're creating for yourself. So the

more we can feel that—. Is it about sensing something, or is

it about learning to identify something and

understand how to deal with it? Well,

the way I explain it is that I help my clients come home to who

they are. Oh, that is so beautiful. That is such a

beautiful way to say it. Oh, thanks. Yes, because they

already know their answers, but they, you know, it's kind

of like being in the forest, you know. It's like there's a path this way

and this way and that way, and it's like, oh my gosh, you know, I

don't know what to do. I've, I did the

fitness stuff. I've taken all these courses, I've,

you know, and I'm still feeling full of anxiety. And so

that's where I help them with that. I get them really

grounded enough so that they know which path to choose.

I just have to say, it's such incredible wisdom that you're

sharing. And I hope you

enjoy so much

satisfaction personally and professionally,

knowing how you're helping people. And I say

it all the time, you change the life of one person, you do change the

world, because there is that trickle-down effect, that, that ripple effect,

if you want to call it that. What a wonderful

way to spend your day.

I get a lot of joy out of it. I, you know, as you were

speaking, I One client came to mind that

she was in one of my courses

that I was doing for survivors of violence and abuse and

helping them get back into the workforce. And she came into

the program with a 3-month-old baby

and just in the midst of fleeing this

relationship. And she really heard

what I was saying about coming home to herself, like

to really experience that regardless

of what's happening in your life right now. Just come home to here.

And she really got it. And, you know, I think

how many years— it was quite a few years ago, 45 years ago,

and she's flourishing. She is making a

huge difference in her community. Her child

is now in kindergarten and flourishing. Like, it's just lovely to

watch because she got to understand

how her operating system works enough so that she can

continue to be successful in her life and also to enjoy it.

And to enjoy it and raise it and raise a good— another good human

being. That's wonderful. Yeah, she keeps saying she wants her daughter

to come visit me. So on that note, I

will say, is it ever too soon to start this kind

of self-work, or ever too late?

Is change always possible? Well,

that's the only constant in this world, is change. True.

Yes. However, I I do, do feel for parents,

those that are listening that do have younger children, start it

now. Start the language now in your home. Recognize

how to manage the moods that are in your environment

and deal with it with ease and grace instead of it

being like this constant— because the home needs to be that

safe place so that they can come, you

know, for all of you to come home to that. Shouldn't

there be a course before you bring another human being into

this world to know how to do it from the best

direction and to follow the best path?

There should be books and there should be courses, I think, based on what

you were saying, for teachers to know how when they're dealing with

many, many children, all who are unique, different, come

from different backgrounds or dealing with different home circumstances,

including the teacher's home circumstance.

There are so many courses that we should be teaching.

Teach nutrition in medical school, teach finance in high school. There are

so many courses about life itself

that are not taught. We often learn the hard way.

Completely agree. And so this is where parents need to step up

now because our school systems are not doing a great job at that.

And you know, you're lucky when your child gets into

a classroom where it's a great teacher. I remember

my daughter, she was watching a movie on bullying one year when

she She was in grade 2, and she got really quiet after

the movie. She goes, "Mom, I want to start a girls' club in my class."

And then all the grade 2s, all the school.

So I was like, "Okay." So we went in and talked to the

teacher about it, you know, because she— the way she saw her students

was they were all leaders. And so here's my daughter coming

in as a leader saying, "I want to create this."

And she was all for it. And so we created a little program.

But the other teachers in the other grade 2 classes, oh no, no,

can't do that, because it was just for girls. So,

you know, so it's being really open to

learning as an adult just as much as a child, because

if I didn't pay attention to my daughter and what she was thinking,

you know, and, and to take her lead and, and

follow through with it to see what was possible. And

so yeah, so that there's a skill that develops at such a young age

is leadership, and she was able to tap into that.

Beautiful, beautiful. What does she do now? Huh,

she's in cosmetics. Well, okay, that's okay. That's a

huge industry. Wonderful. It makes us all feel better about ourselves,

look better about ourselves. You know, she's very creative, and

both my daughters, I As I think I was mentioning

earlier to you, I was starting my career in fashion, got into the

beauty industry, and now my two daughters are both in those industries.

It's in it's in there, their blood, I guess. So yeah, it's in their DNA.

And how you've moved, and hopefully they're both so happy with what

they're doing. And you know, I've been in both of those

industries as well, and what I've learned about it and,

and I believe in

retrospect I understood it in the moment

and really came to understand or validate my thoughts and beliefs

later on, is that in dealing with— in the

cosmetics industry, in the spa industry, and we had a very steady

clientele of people who came in and, you know, you thought you were— they were

coming in for, you know, an eyeshadow, a

good cleanser, a good facial, there was so

much more for them to get.

It became a community because there were standing appointments. The same people every

Tuesday at 1:00 were there Tuesday at 1:00. They had like their

own little network. They had their own little support group.

And I would say to our staff, my sister and I were partners,

I would say, don't think that it's only about,

but don't underestimate the value that you are laying your

hand on somebody. You are coming in physical

contact with someone, and that moment, that tender touch might

be the only tender touch they're going to get that day.

The only kindness that they're going to receive. That

you think they're coming in for, you know, lipstick,

hair, a pretty new outfit, but

there's so much more woman to woman through

those channels that connects us. There is so much—

I think I'll use the word therapy, and I don't mean it to be

like the way you are a therapist, but there's so

much that comes through those

experiences. Well, it's very personal. It's very, very

personal. And that's an interesting point because it,

it's connection. You know, we need human connection right from

the beginning of our lives. We've needed human connection.

And but the difference is, is, you know, is someone

doing the hand massage and is she fully present?

Is she fully present and giving that full energy

to, to that client? Or is their mind wandering somewhere

else about, you know, what am I going to do after work, or I need

to go to the gym, or, you know? And that makes a huge impact

on in that experience for that particular client. Yeah, yeah.

Well, the conversations that we had, I mean, we knew

everything about everybody. And I used to say, oh my God, you know, I

remember saying to my dad, this goes back decades, saying to my dad, you know,

we're really missing, we had a very successful business, but I said, I think we're

missing something before reality shows. I said, this is a

TV show happening that we should be taping these conversations

because, they would be almost like one

continuing conversation throughout the whole day. You know, the people

that came in at 9 o'clock would do their thing and they knew each other,

and then a couple of them left and the next 10 o'clock people came in.

But the same conversation kind of continued through the day. That'S Oh,

so great. And you got— and I had a very— I

had an educated clientele, many of them in education, many of them

in guidance. And there was

depth to the conversation. There were

results from the conversation.

There was follow-up that when they saw each other

the next week that they could say, how did that work out for you? How

was that party you went to? And.

It was a it was a very— very special

scenario that we created. And I used to always say, don't—

this might be the only time that people ask them their opinion or

are kind to them or help them settle their brain.

Yes, help them settle their brain and say, what

I'm thinking, what I'm feeling matters to somebody else.

Yes. Yeah, yeah, that sounds kind of going. Off on a tangent

here. Well, but I, you know, but you're raising a really great

point of environments like that

without knowing the operating system behind is letting

people relax their minds, you know, it's just letting people go,

oh, I could take a deeper breath now, you know, before I go back into

my life. And but in the work that I do is

let me show you how that is created for you so

that after you leave the salon you can continue that feeling,

right, for the weeks to come. Yeah, yeah.

Interesting, right? It's, it's, wow. We did, um,

when we sold that business, people were very angry at us because

the person who came on could have done it just as well as far as

the services delivered, but it didn't have that personal. And you know what?

There was some protection in that. And then I'm gonna let you go. There was

an anonymity because they knew each other just in that environment,

in that storefront at that time of the day. On that

day of the week, whatever. And they would leave. And what

they left behind, what they imparted onto other people,

what they took from other people, they left. And they could

process that. And there was calm, there was no

judgment. And then there could be follow-up same time next week.

Yeah. That there was an anonymity that kind of protected them.

And what I like about that, and that's where

therapy kind of misses the boat a little bit is just you want to just

have a— you want it to feel like a cup of coffee

with a good friend. We're doing here. Yeah, so

that— yes. And so what you created in your salon, what you're

creating here, what I'm creating in my work is, is, is that,

you know, I go— I do walk and talks with my clients as

well because it's— sometimes you just need to get out in nature and

have these conversations and not face to face. And

right. Yeah. You have to say to our listeners, especially

to women, because I will tell you that where Beth

talks gets delivered and, you know, we have no control over who watches it and

who doesn't, it can go and live forever and ever.

But I know that so many are successful

women who may have reached

a point in life, an age, a stage where a

transition is being made. From.

She who was the professional entrepreneur. And I say the 9-to-5

thing because we know entrepreneurs, it's 24/7. We know that. But

that now they're looking to transition into their

next phase or stage of life, and they need

to know how to combine, as we were saying, the

spirituality and the psychology. Yes. And come

to grips with who they are now and what they still

have to offer. Because I believe with all my heart, every woman

continues to have so much to offer,

and you have to take care of yourself so that you can help

to take care of others. Yeah, absolutely. And it's—

so I'm also writing another book. It's a little

smaller, but that one's done now. I just finished it this

past week, and it's It's all about lipstick,

and it's a funny story and how I got started on it. But

the way it's been broken down is looking at maiden, mother,

and elder, and how lipstick weaves itself through

our lives in these different stages of life. And

because I'm in the elder stage and, you know, being on the

cusp and just figuring out, you know,

what's— what does it mean? Do I wear a different color now? You know,

what's it representing? And and who I'm showing up as. And

so it's really fun to kind of look at how life can be

playful, you know. And I think when we understand

our psychology at a greater depth, where it is

bridging with our spiritual experience,

it's playful. I mean, if you look at children, they

are perfect role models for us around that, you know. They

just know how to tap into it. Yes. I can't believe that

you said that, that the book was written the around thought of lipstick, because we

were just talking about that. And I— we've never had— please, to our

viewers, Quinn and I have just met in this conversation. We have

not had any rehearsals. We have not done a deep dive

into each other here. But that lipstick, like, I used that

kind of metaphorically as people were coming in.

But it was never about the lipstick. Yeah. It was never.

A really cute story. My mother had lost her engagement

ring. And it's a good

ending. But she was upset,

obviously. And my little nephew, he was probably about 4

at that point. So they were sitting in the car trying to figure out what

to do. And my sister was off reporting it. It's, it's a long

story, but the essence of it is that he said to her, nanny,

put on lipstick. And he said

that because obviously, and previously

he had said either to his mom, my sister, or maybe to my mother,

his grandmother, why are you wearing lipstick? And

she said, because it makes me feel better.

And he wanted her to feel better. In that

moment of terrible. And he said, "Nanny, put on Put on lipstick." lipstick.

Wasn't that the sweetest thing? That is. And he's now like 37 years

old. And we remind him of that all the time. He still blushes because he's

kind of a quiet guy, but worth waiting for him to

say something because it's usually a gem. So

I've gotta let you go, but I wanna say to our listeners, our viewers,

please take the opportunity of this introduction that

Bep Talks has made and

has introduced you to Quinn and the

work that she does and the true wisdom that she

has. And I have to say the passion that

I'm feeling that you have for the work that you do, and

perhaps even more particularly for the results that you've seen.

And that, you know, can happen. And it

makes all the sense in the world to me that when you have a great

resource like Quinn,

put it to work for yourself. Take

the opportunity to explore,

to be willing to look at yourself in the

mirror. And maybe you say, I'm not wearing the right shade of lipstick. Maybe something

has to change. You know, it could be as simple as that. Let

Quinn help you pick the right shade of lipstick, calm you down,

and make you feel really good about all that you've already done

and what still is ahead of you to do for

yourself, for your family, for your community, for the world.

Because we need people and we sure need people like Quinn.

This has been such a delight. I have learned so much

And you've made me conscious of some of my own

actions and reactions. So I personally thank you for that.

Oh, it was a delight to have this conversation. Thank you so

much. My absolute pleasure. So again, take advantage. The information

is below. You know, I always say at Bev Talks, everybody has a story.

Everybody has their own wisdom, as Quinn has

shared hers with us today. It's worth hearing.

People need to hear it. So I invite you to share your story,

your beliefs, your experiences, your passions on a Bebtalks

interview such as this. The information is below. Please be in

touch. I hope that I'll get to meet you in the Bebtalks studio soon.

And until that day may come, as we always say, may the best always

be yet to come. And until we talk again,

bye for now.