The Lincoln Imp: A Folk Tale from Lincolnshire

Hello and welcome to Tales Over Tea, a podcast from Bears & Beton. I'm Morgan, a modern day bard and folklore enthusiast.

In this series, we'll be visiting legendary heroes, mythical creatures and gribbly monsters, and seeing what wisdom they might have for us today.

So why don't you come in, take a seat by the fire, and enjoy a cup of tea while we dive into today's tale?

Welcome to the very first episode of Tales Over Tea. My name is Morgan, and I'm delighted to welcome you to the show.

As I said in the introduction, I'm a modern day bard and a storyteller, and one thing I particularly love is folklore.

As a child, my bedtime stories often consisted of Arthurian legends and Greek mythology, and this interest in folklore has followed me into adulthood.

One thing I particularly enjoy is settling down with a book of spooky tales and a cold, dark, wet evening when you'd rather not be outside.

But I also enjoy learning these stories with the intention of performing them live at a storytelling circle in front of an audience of listeners. And I decided I wanted to share this passion in podcast form.

One thing I particularly love about these old tales is the wisdom that's contained within them. These stories can help us connect to the land — yes, even if we're living in the city — to our shared histories, and to our ancestors.

I personally feel that these tales are still as relevant today as they were when they were first written. In this series, I'm planning to explore tales from across the British Isles and Europe.

Each episode will begin with a cosy retelling of a story. Now each storyteller will tell their tales a little bit differently, which is why there's often no one single version of a myth or a legend. This podcast is no exception.

While I'll try to stay as close to the source material as possible, I might occasionally throw in my own twists or add a dash of my own humour.

After the story, we'll then take a look at the history behind it and see what messages we might be able to extract for our modern day lives.

For today's story, I decided to begin with something from the city of Lincoln in the East Midlands, partly because I love this story and partly because Lincoln happens to be my hometown, and it felt like a good place to begin.

The main character of this story isn't some obscure figure who's been lost to the mists of time, but he's actually become somewhat of an icon. I'm talking about the Lincoln Imp. If you visit Lincoln today, it's hard to escape the Imp's presence.

You will spot him everywhere. But more on that later, as I'm sure you're keen to hear the story first.

So why don't you make yourself comfy by the fire? Cedric's just popped on another log, so it's nice and toasty, and the water's just finished boiling, in case you want a cup of tea. Today's blend is a gentle chamomile with a drizzle of honey.

Comfy? Then let's begin.

A long, long time ago, the devil was in a frolicsome mood, as he so often happens to be. He decided he wanted to unleash some chaos on England. Perhaps he was annoyed by all of the cathedrals popping up all over the place, like mushrooms after rain.

Or perhaps he was just a little bit bored, but he sent two teeny tiny, cheeky little imps to do his bidding. The imps' first stop on their journey of chaos was the market town of Chesterfield.

The imps appeared with a POP in the town centre and began flying through the streets. They upended boxes of produce, spilling potatoes, carrots, leeks and more all over the cobblestone streets of the town.

They ripped down tavern signs and chucked them to each other like frisbees, and they bounced up and down on the marketplace awnings as if it was a trampoline. The people of Chesterfield were outraged, but could they catch the imps?

No, they could not. Those quick and cheeky little creatures darted through the town, and eventually they came across the church, St. Mary and All Saints.

"Ohoho," they laughed to each other, "Should we cause a little bit of chaos here?"

And so they did.

They grabbed each other's hands and began flying circles around the church's spire, all the way to the very top. This is why the church's spire is twisted to this day.

After an afternoon of chaos in Chesterfield, the two imps set off for Lincoln, which at the time had just unveiled their shiny new cathedral.

They made their way into the Fenlands, passing over marshes that had yet to be irrigated, and flying through farmers' fields. And they couldn't resist a little bit more chaos on the way.

They flew up to unsuspecting cows, tipping them where they stood. They booted farmers up the backside, and pinched some apples from the orchards, ready to throw at the next peasant they happened to come across.

Finally, the city of Lincoln and its shiny new cathedral atop the hill came into view. The imps cackled to each other — "ready to cause some chaos?" — and into the town they flew.

They made their way through the twisting lanes of Steep Hill, all the way up to the very top, and took a right when the castle came into view. They flew across the cobblestone square, straight through the front doors of the cathedral.

Inside they got straight to doing what they do best, causing chaos. They picked the pillows up from the pews and chucked them at each other, giggling as feathers erupted in the air.

They upturned pews, cackling as the bangs and crashes reverberated through the cathedral. They picked up the bibles, ripped out the pages and chucked them in the air like confetti.

Now, this chaos was not polite and quiet, and eventually the bishop came out to see what on earth was happening in his cathedral. Immediately the imps set on him.

One jabbed him in the back of the knees, the other booted him up the backside so he fell, and then they took to pulling on his clothing, pulling on his hair, jabbing him in the face.

The bishop managed to free himself and dived under the nearest table, pulling the cloth down around him to protect himself from the imps. And he sent up a desperate prayer to his god.

"Please, if you're listening, send someone down to take care of these imps! They are causing an absolute nuisance in my cathedral!"

With that, the cathedral erupted in light and there was a deafening AHHH as a SWAT team of biblically accurate angels descended upon the cathedral.

Their hundreds and thousands of eyes swept back and forth, scanning the cathedral for the troublesome two.

At the sight of these fearsome creatures, one of the imps broke out in panic. He dived under the table, cowering there with the bishop.

The other one, though, wasn't scared. He turned to face the angels, looked them in the eye, let out a soft giggle, "ho ho ho", and said: "Catch me if you can!"

And off he set through the cathedral. He ducked and darted through the nooks and crannies of the building, SWAT team of angels on his tail.

He dive-bombed through windows, the glass tinkering behind him, swooped through the crypt, and was eventually corned in what is now known as the Angel Choir. But still, the Imp would not give in.

He perched at the top of a column, ready to deliver some snarky comment. But zap! The angels froze him there in place, and he is still sat there to this day.

But what about the other Imp, I hear you asking? The one that was cowering under the table with the bishop? The fate of this Imp is unknown, and there's quite a few different versions of the story.

But many say the wind around the cathedral is him looking for a way back in to rescue his friend.

The SWAT team of angels was of course my own invention, but otherwise, I've stuck pretty closely to the original story, or at least what people think is the original story. But more on that shortly.

First, let's talk a little bit about what the Imp actually is, because the Lincoln Imp really does exist inside Lincoln Cathedral. He is, in fact, a grotesque.

The owl-eared amongst you might have noticed that I said grotesque and not gargoyle, and I recently learned that there's a difference between the two.

The difference isn't to do with artistry or what these figures depict, but it's actually to do with what they're used for architecturally.

Many people use the word gargoyle for any carving of a mythical creature on old buildings, but a gargoyle specifically refers to grotesques that drain water away from the side of buildings.

Has it got a spout? Then it's a gargoyle. No spout? Grotesque.

If you already knew that, well done. If not, well, you've learned something new, and you can whip that fact out of your back pocket next time you're visiting a cathedral.

So what does the Imp look like? This is not a video podcast, it's audio only, so I will very quickly describe him to you.

The Lincoln Imp is approximately 30cm tall. He has a half-human, half-animal head, with two horns and two sticky-out, goat-like ears.

Around his neck and shoulders he wears a ruffle of what could be fur or feathers. He has two cloven hoofs at the end of his legs, and one of those legs is crossed over in his lap. His palms rest on his crossed leg, and he's leaning forward with a devilish grin on his face.

I personally think he's quite adorable. He looks a little bit like my dog in fact. (Don't tell her I said that.)

edral was constructed between: 1250

But let's get back to that debate about the original story.

in popularity until about the: 1800

Around the same time though, perhaps even inspired by the revival of the Imp through Mr Usher, a poet by the alias of Arnold Frost popularised the folktale that became the basis of the modern-day myth.

Frost's version was printed as a poem titled 'The Ballad of the Wind, the Devil and the Lincoln Minster', which he claimed was based on an old Lincolnshire legend told to him by "a North Lincolnshire man, 60 years of age, who, as a boy, had heard his father relate it."

In Frost's version, the Devil is said to have had the runt of Lincolnshire, able to get up to whatever chaos he fancied, up until the arrival of Bishop Remedius, who wanted to build a cathedral in the city.

In this version, it's not the imps that are interfering, but it's the Devil. The Devil repeatedly tries to prevent this Bishop from building the cathedral, but alas, he was unsuccessful.

In one last-ditch effort, he stopped the Bishop at the South West corner and tried to kill him. But the Bishop called upon the Virgin Mary, who buffeted the Devil with wind, and pushed him into the cathedral from where he cannot escape.

So in this original version, there's no mention of the Imp, and it's in fact the Devil who is blown into the cathedral and is frozen in place inside.

However, Frost, being somewhat of a storyteller and wanting to add his own twist to the story, added a line to the poem about the Devil transforming into the Imp and sitting grinning on the wall.

And since then, the tale has evolved to become the version we know and love today.

Let's jump back to Mr. Usher. James Ward Usher was a local jeweller, and he's still quite a famous name in the city of Lincoln.

popularity of the Imp. In the: 1890

He went absolutely wild with this, and the Imp started appearing on all manner of items. We're talking brooches, cufflinks, tiepins, spoons, thimbles, all featuring the image of the Imp, and often set with precious stones.

However, there's also a little bit of a twist here, because instead of being the mischievous figure that we know the Imp to be today, Usher's Imp was actually marketed as a good luck charm. Specifically, he was supposed to prevent people from losing things of importance to them.

Now, I'm not entirely convinced of this interpretation. I've got two Imps in my flat, although neither are by Mr. Usher, and I am forever losing things. So the jury's still out on whether the Imp is really a good luck charm or not. I like to think that they protect the place, even if they don't keep my things from disappearing.

his marketing campaign in the: 1890

You can find older examples, such as Imp's protecting houses in the form of brass door knockers. If you go into any gift shop in the town, you will likely find a little Imp that you can take away.

And last time I visited Lincoln, I was thrilled to see a shop at the top of Steep Hill, selling all manner of imps. Some of them are pocket sized, some of them are a little bit bigger, some of them are tie-dye, some of them are single colours.

All of them are truly unique. This shop is called the Imporium. Not the Emporium, but the Imp-porium. One thing you'll notice though is that their Imp doesn't have its legs crossed like the one in the cathedral.

Instead, this Imp is supposed to be the one that got away. I'm yet to visit the shop, but I'm hoping to pop in next time I'm in Lincoln.

They even have an Imp Catchers quest, which takes you on a tour of the Old Town, setting puzzles at various locations, and brings a new twist on the Imp legend to the city of Lincoln.

You'll find more Imps down the hill too.

If you're a football fan, you'll know that the local team is nicknamed the Red Imps, and that their mascot is a life-sized Imp named Poacher. You can also find a dancing Imp on the logo of the Lincolnshire County Council. And it doesn't stop there.

In: 2021

phrase dates back to at least: 1562

And finally, for the video game fans amongst you, if you've ever played Elden Ring and passed through the Erdtree Door in Leyndell after setting fire to the place, an Imp that looks suspiciously like the one in Lincoln Cathedral can be spotted lurking amidst the branches.

So there we have it, a little bit of the history of the Imp, as well as its cultural impact. But what can this story teach us today? What messages might be encoded within it?

As someone with an interest in green witchcraft and druidry, I've taken a slightly environmental stance on this idea.

My take on this story — and you might have a different one, which is absolutely fine; if you do, please pop it in the comments and let me know — but my take is that sometimes you have to be a nuisance to make it into the history books.

Just to clarify, I'm not advocating for everybody to run into their local cathedrals and start cow-tipping unsuspecting priests, although the idea does amuse me somewhat.

But instead, I want to look at this story through the lens of environmental activism.

What we're seeing again and again in the face of climate change is that politely asking those in charge — those in government, those in positions of power — for things to change isn't really working.

The latest COP summits have been somewhat of a disappointment. In certain countries, environmental protections are being rolled back, and in others, things just aren't moving fast enough for our changing world.

But there are a lot of eco-activists out there who are making nuisances of themselves.

In Berlin, for example, eco-activists will often hold sit-ins on the city's busiest roads, gluing themselves to the tarmac. This of course means that traffic comes to an absolute standstill in the city centre, and it can take hours to resolve.

Unfortunately, instead of getting support, you'll often see police coming in to violently haul these people away, and sometimes even angry drivers will get out of their cars and start attacking these individuals, who are just trying to do their bit to raise awareness.

Yes, it's inconvenient to not get to where you need to go, but so is planetary destruction.

Let's jump forward 50 years, to a time where we're hopefully living in a green future free of fossil fuels.

Who's going to be the hero in this story? The nuisance makers, of course.

I'm aware that not everybody has the option to be a nuisance maker in the most drastic sense of the word, especially for those of us who might be living with chronic illnesses, or living in countries where we're on visas or residency permits.

But if you can, and feel called to do so, I encourage you to be a little bit like The Lincoln Imp. Be a nuisance in whatever way you can.

And if you can't be the nuisance you want to see in the world, then see how you can support those nuisance makers in your circles, whether that's offering a mental health check-in, uplifting their voices online, or something else entirely.

Let's change the world, inconvenience by inconvenience.

And on that note, today's Tales Over Tea comes to a close. I hope you enjoyed getting comfy by the fire with a good brew and listening to today's tale.

Next month's story will take us out into the misty marshes of Lincolnshire and feature a cast of gribbly monsters, angry villagers, and a daring celestial being.

But for now, the fire is dying down, the real world is calling, and I bid you a fond farewell.

Thank you for listening to Tales Over Tea. If you enjoyed this episode, please consider following or subscribing on whatever platform you're listening on.

In the meantime, you can find me on Instagram @bearsandbeton for behind the scenes and extra content in between episodes.

I look forward to sharing more stories with you soon.

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