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Hello, darling heart, and welcome to the drink less, live better podcast. This is the podcast that helps you to see that drinking
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less doesn't need to be stressful, lonely, or boring. I'm your host, Sarah Williamson, and I decided to have a year alcohol
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free as a little life experiment and haven't looked back. With my experience and training, I now help other women with their
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alcohol free or drink less adventures. You can find out more about me and sign up to my 5 day drink less challenge at drink
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less live better dot com. I'm here to tell you that you can relax, connect, and have fun without alcohol in your life. Join
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me here each week to find out how. What will other people think? When I first decided to embark on my alcohol free adventure,
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there were a lot of thoughts running through my head. I became a bit paralyzed and unable to move forward for a while because
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my thoughts were running my feelings and emotions, emotions which were keeping me in that stuck place. Side note here, have
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a little listen to episode 27 if you are in the messy middle One of the reasons I was so stuck was because I became overly
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worried about what other people would think about my choice to stop drinking. I found all sorts of ways to soften the blow
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for friends and family and to change their way of thinking about my choice. I'd say, oh, I'm just not drinking today, or I'm
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taking a break for a month to illustrate that I didn't have a problem with alcohol and to stop them trying to encourage me
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to drink. But, of course, trying to make someone think a certain way is a surefire ride to disappointment town. People are
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going to think what they're going to think, and there's only so so much you can do to influence that and absolutely nothing
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you can do to control it. So maybe just stop trying. And while we're here, in that place where we're talking about what other
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people are thinking, you do know that's none of your business, don't you? I say this with love and kindness. What you think
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of other people is your own private world, and the same is true the other way round. It's really easy to get hung up on explaining
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ourselves from why we've made the alcohol free or sober choice we have to explaining our drink of choice on a night out. Perhaps
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you've got a night out planned either with people you know well or with acquaintances. These might be people who have seen
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you in your drinking heyday or people to whom you are a drinking clean slate. We might think, oh, what will I say if someone
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asks what I'm drinking? What if they ask me why I'm not drinking? What if the waiter says there's no alcohol free beer? Well,
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I'm gonna tell you this. If someone asks what you're drinking, you tell the truth. Tonic water, lime and soda, ginger beer,
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whatever. If someone asks why you're not drinking, you kick them in the shin and say it's none of your business you nosy dib.
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I'm kidding joking joking. You smile sweetly and either tell the truth, I'm taking a break at the moment, I feel better not
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drinking, I don't feel like it tonight. Or you tell a white lie if you have to. I'm on antibiotics. I'm training for a marathon.
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I'm pregnant. With those last 2, be careful. You may need to actually run a marathon or produce a baby at some point. The
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point is we think people are interested, and we think they care, but I'm here to tell you they really aren't. Once they had
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1 or 2 drinks themselves, they won't even notice who else is or isn't drinking around them. People occasionally question us
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when they feel defensive about their own drinking habits, but again, that's on them and not on you. Who cares what other people
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think? Really? Which are the other areas of your life where you think, oh, I wonder what x, y, z, friends, or colleagues will
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make of my choice to be, I don't know, vegetarian, or get a new dog, or paint my sitting room dark green. Never. You just
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never feel the need to explain or justify your choice feeling defensive, would you? I chose the dark green sitting room example
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as that was the colour used in our house when we moved in. Why? Why did no one consult on that? I ask myself. Perhaps they
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should have done. Yes. What will other people think of my choice? The answer is is we have no way of knowing unless we ask
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them. So you can either ask them, or you can be left guessing. But how about this? Don't ask them, and don't guess either.
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It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. It really, really matters what you think, and what do you think. I hope it's something
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along the lines of, I'm choosing not to drink because I don't want to or need to. I think better, I feel better, and I behave
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like a more authentic version of myself without it. And that's a goddamn rockstar feeling. Thank you for listening in today.
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Come back again next week, and PS, I believe in you.