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Shaping Grandkids Who'll Remember You
Episode 1429th November 2025 • CROWD Church Livestream • Crowd Church
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Shaping Grandkids Who'll Remember You

Ever wonder if you'll be remembered? Not just as "Grandma" or "Grandad" who gave good presents, but as someone who actually shaped lives, who passed on something worth catching?

In this honest conversation, Dave Connolly unpacks the story of Lois - an ordinary grandmother whose sincere faith rippled through three generations so powerfully that Paul wrote about it in 2 Timothy. This wasn't a perfect family with everything sorted. Eunice married outside the faith, Timothy's father was absent, and the household faced real complexities. Yet somehow, a grandmother's authentic walk with God changed everything.

Dave shares vulnerable stories including his own parenting regrets, weekly rhythms with his five grandchildren, and the powerful impact of telling 'miracle stories' about God's provision. You'll discover why sincere faith matters more than perfect parenting, how to shape grandchildren without controlling them, and practical ways to leave a legacy that outlasts you.

Journey with us through:

  • [06:00] Lois, Eunice, Timothy: Three generations of sincere faith
  • [12:00] What made Lois's influence last across generations
  • [20:00] Legacy and intentional investment in grandchildren
  • [38:00] Finding grace despite parenting failures
  • [48:00] Regrets about not asking grandparents more questions
  • [54:00] Why writing your story matters

[08:00] Sincere Faith That Carries You Through

Dave unpacks what Paul meant when he described Lois's "sincere faith" in 2 Timothy 1:5. This wasn't religious performance or perfect theology - it was an authentic, tested, genuine relationship with Jesus.

"Sincere faith in my experience has been the thing that carries you through life. A sincere faith. Because you're talking about a real faith, one that you have a personal saviour, personal relationship, personal walk."

What we explore:

  • Why authenticity matters more than perfection in passing on faith
  • How Lois influenced despite her daughter's choices
  • The difference between religious routine and genuine relationship
  • What it means for faith to "live" in someone

Key takeaway: Sincere faith isn't inherited like property - it's caught through relationship and example.

[16:00] Second Chances as Grandparents

With refreshing honesty, Dave shares how being a grandparent feels like getting a second go at things you feel you did poorly as a parent.

"If I said to men, write down all the things you do really well as a dad, you could give them a large stamp and there'd still be space on it. But if I said what you do really poorly, you could give them a roll of wallpaper."

Real talk about:

  • Carrying guilt about past parenting failures
  • Why grandchildren are God's blessing, not replacements
  • How finding grace changes everything
  • The privilege of investing in the next generation

Key takeaway: Don't concentrate on your failures - address them, ask God to strengthen you, and move forward with grace.


[22:00] Miracle Stories and Tea Time Traditions

Dave shares how he and his wife Julie deliberately tell their grandchildren what they call "miracle stories" - real encounters with God's faithfulness over the years.

"They love these stories. They want to know more and more and more. Not fairy tales or Joe Bloggs' story, but things, God encounters that Julie and I have had with God over the years."

Practical ideas:

  • Weekly "one good, one bad" at tea time to create space for prayer
  • Telling the same stories repeatedly - children need repetition
  • Creating simple traditions like throwing stones in water
  • Letting grandchildren experience joy without overthinking safety

Key takeaway: Share your real stories of God's provision - these give grandchildren a framework for understanding their own lives when challenges come.


[38:00] Finding Grace Despite Broken Beginnings

Dave vulnerably shares his own story of growing up with absent parents, sofa-surfing from a young age, and how becoming a Christian changed everything.

"As I became a Christian, somehow in God, I found so much more grace for them. Without finding that grace, I don't believe we could have been part of leading them to the Lord."

Hope for:

  • Those carrying wounds from imperfect parents or grandparents
  • Understanding that honouring doesn't mean ignoring harm
  • How God's grace enables restoration
  • Breaking cycles through authentic faith

Key takeaway: Even imperfect, broken people can pass on sincere faith when they encounter God's transforming grace.


[48:00] Regrets We All Carry

The conversation turned to a universal regret - not asking grandparents more questions whilst we had the chance.

"If I could go back in time and do something different, what would you do? I'd talk to my Nan and just get her stories from her." - Matt Edmundson

For everyone:

  • Why we didn't ask when we were younger
  • The importance of recording stories now
  • How Sharon's grandmother wrote "Lost and Found" about her life
  • Making time to honour grandparents whilst you still can

Key takeaway: Don't wait. If you still have grandparents, ask the questions now. If you are a grandparent, write your story - even if just for your grandchildren.


[50:00] Different Grandparents, Same Love

Jan shares how her mum and mother-in-law bring completely different gifts to grandparenting - one more cuddly, the other doing baking and historical trips. Both create brilliant memories.

"They're unique. Those grandparents aren't in competition. We just want to love and love freely." - Dave Connolly

Wisdom about:

  • Why comparison kills joy in grandparenting
  • How Dave works alongside his daughter's father-in-law (who isn't a Christian)
  • Teaching grandchildren through bonfire night traditions
  • Complementing rather than competing with other grandparents

Key takeaway: Your unique contribution matters without diminishing what other grandparents bring.

Transcripts

Matt Edmundson:

Hello and welcome to Crowd Church coming to you live

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from Liverpool this Sunday night.

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My name is Matt Edmundson, and whether

this is your first time or whether

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you've been part of our journey since the

beginning, it's brilliant to be with you.

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We are a community of people figuring

out what it means to follow Jesus.

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In real life, not the polished,

perfect version, but you know, the

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messy, genuine, brilliant reality of

this whole thing called Christianity.

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So let me give you a little

roadmap of what's gonna be

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happening over the next hour.

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We'll have a talk, lasts about 20

minutes looking at the topic of

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relationships, which is the section of

our series becoming whole, that we are

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looking at exploring how Christ makes

us whole across every domain of life.

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After the talk, we've

got conversation streets.

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Oh yes.

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This is where we dig into what

you've just heard, and you get

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to be part of that discussion.

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So if you're with us live, jump into

the comments, share your questions,

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your thoughts, and your stories.

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And of course, if you are watching on

Catchup or listening to the podcast, then

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thanks for being part of the Crowd too.

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Dave Connolly: Right?

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Let's meet your hosts

and let's get started.

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Two.

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Matt Edmundson: Good evening.

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Welcome to Crowd Church.

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My name is Matt.

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Great to be with you on

this fine November evening.

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Mm-hmm.

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Uh, a very warm welcome to you.

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If this first time with us great.

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That you are with us.

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If this is your 400th time with us mm-hmm.

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I'd love to know how you've done that.

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'cause we've only done

two 50 live streams.

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But what, whatever, uh, it's,

it's great that you are with us.

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Uh, tonight.

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I'm joined by the beautiful Jan.

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Jan.

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Say hi.

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Jan Burch: Uh, hi everyone.

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Thanks.

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Thanks for watching and listening.

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Matt Edmundson: And

also the beautiful Dave.

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Dave, say hi

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Dave Connolly: again.

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That would be handsome, I think.

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Matt Edmundson: Okay.

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Dave Connolly: Just to

position it rightly.

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Good evening everyone.

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Good to be here.

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Matt Edmundson: Gotta get it right.

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Gotta get it right.

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So welcome to you, uh,

yeah, great to be with you.

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Dave's gonna be sharing

the word of God with us.

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Uh, in just a few minutes, we're gonna

get into some great stuff, no doubt.

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From Dave.

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We're gonna jump into our whole series.

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We've been talking about becoming whole.

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We are looking specifically

at relationships.

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We're getting into some really good

stuff tonight, so make sure you grab

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your notebooks, grab your pens, write

any comments, uh, in the comments as

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we go along, any questions that you

have, and we'll try and answer them.

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Uh, after Dave's done his talk, we do

something called Conversation Street,

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which is where we try and answer your

questions if it's your first time here.

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And then after that we are

gonna meet up on Google.

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So we have a Google meets

room, uh, which Zoe.

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We'll put in the comments at some

point in the non too distant future

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or we put it in the comments.

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Awesome.

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Uh, so that's the link.

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Go Crowd Church slash meet.

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It's in the livestream.

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Comments do come and join us.

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Of course, if you're watching

this on catch up or listening

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to it on the podcast, don't come

join us 'cause we won't be there.

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Uh, but if you are, if you're

with us on the livestream, it'll

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be great to see you in there.

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Come say hi, um, and

come meet a few of us.

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And a few of the guys that watch

online, uh, and join, join in.

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Just, you know, it's always nice

to connect with people, isn't it?

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And it's always good to

have a bit of a chin wag.

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Uh, so that's what we're gonna

do, uh, at the end of the service.

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Jan Burch: Mm-hmm.

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Matt Edmundson: So, uh, anything else?

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Have I missed, Jen?

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Jan Burch: No, no.

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Just, um, yeah, just a warm welcome

to everyone and, um, over to.

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So, Dave, do you know what Dave's

talking about tonight, Matt?

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Matt Edmundson: I'm not, I'm not

even sure Dave knows what he's

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talking about tonight, so Oh, yes

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Jan Burch: I do.

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Matt Edmundson: Oh, do,

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Jan Burch: it's about being a

grandfather or grand having grandparents.

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Matt Edmundson: Yeah, grandparents.

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Jan Burch: Yeah.

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It

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Matt Edmundson: is the whole

relationship side with grandparents.

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So let's just, well, you've, you've,

you've spoiled it now anyway, sorry.

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Anyway, let's jump into it.

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The amazing handsome,

right, Reverend Dave Conley.

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Dave Connolly: Good evening folks,

or whatever time of day it is.

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You're watching this.

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You are really welcome and we all continue

in this series on relationships and,

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um, I've been tasked, um, to talk about

being a grandparent and, um, I'm sure

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we'll get into some of the personal

stuff when we get to conversation.

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Um, but we like to anchor all

that we're saying in scripture.

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And I just wanna say that, um, you know,

sometimes I was saying to the guys, um.

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As church ministers or people who speak

in church, sometimes we paint this picture

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and it's always like, it appears to be

like, you know, the ideal situation.

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Well, I wanna tell you a story,

um, um, of, you may have heard of

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Timothy and um, he had a grandma

called Louis and a mom called Eunice.

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And we're just gonna look at their

family uni and you will see it.

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Isn't this.

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Perfect family unit and um, 'cause

I think that will help us in our

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context of understanding, um,

'cause life is complex, isn't it?

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Matt Edmundson: Mm-hmm.

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Dave Connolly: If not, write a book

and I'll buy you and you can help me.

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Okay.

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Here we go then.

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So if you've got a, a bible there

with you, I love people to, um,

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either have a Bible or get it on your

phone or whatever your device is.

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And there's um, go to two

Timothy chapter one, verse five.

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That's two Timothy

chapter one, verse five.

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We're just gonna look up one

verse at this moment, and this

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is Paul writing to Timothy.

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He says this, I am reminded of

your sincere faith, which faith

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lived in your grandmother Lewis,

and in your mother, Eunice.

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And I am persuaded now lives in you.

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So can you see that thing

of legacy, you know?

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And um.

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It, it isn't like giving that as

a piece of paper or, or something.

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It's something that you receive and

you, you've learned from that person

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you've been influenced by and that

influence now lives in you personally.

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And, um, and we read, let's just

talk a little bit about, um, Lois.

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Some people call her Lewis,

some people call her Lois.

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And um, we read that

she had a sincere faith.

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A sincere faith.

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I just wanna say, um, sincere faith

in my experience has been the thing

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that carries you through life.

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A sincere faith.

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'cause you're talking about a real faith,

um, one that you have a personal savior,

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personal relationship, personal walk, and

we see, oh, that's passed on to the, to

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her daughter and then to her grandson.

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And you know, Timothy, um, he

eventually becomes Paul the Apostle.

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Uh, he writes all the books in

the New Testament or mo lots of

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the books in the New Testament.

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He becomes Paul's companion and

partner on the mission field.

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He travels with him, you know,

but Lois, he was a Christ follower

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and she had a clear and lasting

influence, as I've said on a household.

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And that means a area, the people who

came within a influence, within the

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boundaries of a, a home, a influence

as a grandma, as a friend, et cetera.

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And the influence had real true impact.

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That it didn't just stop with her

having a good life, a godly life,

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that her influence reached into

eunice's life at the daughter.

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An influenced there, even though

Eunice has to make her own choices.

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And we'll talk about them shortly.

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And then on to Timothy.

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So we need to understand that Lois

invested, sown into those lives.

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I wanna say that these people were real

people living in a real time with all

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the pressures of their day, you know?

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Um, and they had a real

faith, just like maybe you.

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They went through different

seasons of life just like us,

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but they carried a message and

that message stemmed out having

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a personal relationship with

Jesus, you know, as a grandparent.

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So, uh, if you're a grandparent,

um, let me just say this,

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um, you know, grandchildren.

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I often say to people, oh, God's

blessing to you for not killing your

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children when they were teenagers.

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I'm sure you've never had that moment,

but if you have young children,

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they do grow up and bless them.

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Um, there are times when

they're pushing the boundaries.

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So grandchildren are God's blessing to us.

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And, um.

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We may be, you know, pondering, how

do you know, how do we impact our own

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children and our own grandchildren?

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Can I just say, you know, one thing

that's really important to me, and

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I, and I love being a granddad, um,

but it's simply this, that I never

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want my kids to think that, oh, our

grandkids have taken their place.

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Jan Burch: Mm-hmm.

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Dave Connolly: They're two

completely different things.

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Mm-hmm.

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You know, but it is important that your

kids don't feel they're no longer required

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because they've given us grandchildren.

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You sometimes see this worked out on TV

programs and it's wrong, and it's not

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good for your relationship with your kids.

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You know, we have a great opportunity

as grandparents to mold shape

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and influence to help establish a

hoping God in in our grandchildren.

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Jan Burch: What's the best one?

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Dave Connolly: And hopefully it's

something that we've done with our

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children, so it's not something

that we're learning from the get.

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You know, we've all, it, it's just

something that takes on a different

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aspect Now that we're grand and we've

got grandchildren as grandmother,

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um, the life of Lois gives us, um,

real, some real powerful lessons.

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And I'll, I'll mention one or two

here, or maybe three that demonstrate

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that, uh, there are examples to us on

how to influence, you know, um, now

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influence doesn't mean control, by the

way, and, uh, it means to help shape.

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Put stuff out there, help people own it,

not don't operate in the area of command.

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I wanna say that if you don't influence

your grandchildren or and your children,

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there's a whole stack of people

here in the wings waiting to do so.

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Just turn your computer on, turn your

TV on, they're all there, and they won't

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apologize for their outrageousness.

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But if you don't take that moment.

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To share your aspect of

life, your view of life.

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There's honestly, there's a whole

stack of people who will step in.

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So don't be shy.

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An example of being, um, of having a

fame and lively faith, a passionate

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faith, you know, um, it, it isn't

so to be a secret Christian.

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We should be confident

about our work with God.

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We should be thankful.

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We should be joyful about that.

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And in Deuteronomy six, um, that's

in the Old Testament, verse five.

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It says this, love the Lord with

all your heart and with all your

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soul and with all your strength.

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It doesn't mean give him the leftovers,

it doesn't mean being a nominal believer.

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It means being sold out.

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I'm in this, I'm totally invested in this.

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That's what we're called to be as

Christians and our children need to see

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that in us and so do our grandchildren.

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You know how Paul mentions,

um, Lois in two Timothy, it

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highlights that sincere faith.

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Isn't that a wonderful thing?

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Can you imagine our kids when they're

talking to their kids saying, you know,

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nan or granddad or what they call you,

you know, they've got a real, you know,

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sincere faith, they really believe,

um, in, in God and what he is done.

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I'll tell you a little

bit more about that laser.

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Um.

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Timothy first lived with his

grandma, and then, um, we read how

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he, he's then living with his mom.

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Um, as a woman born in Jewish faith,

Lois would have some understanding of

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scripture, what it, um, what it is to

have a God who created her, what it

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was, to have a God who was present.

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She would have a sense of purpose.

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She would have a understanding

of a commitment to that.

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She would've an understanding of some

scripture that they had, and she was

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looking to the promise of the Messiah,

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and that's who she believed in

that, that Messiah who had come.

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Just an interesting

point here that Timothy.

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His father was likely to have been absent.

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And today, you know, um, we live in a dag

where we often read of absent fathers.

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So for those of you think that,

you know, the Bible's just full

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of, you know, ideal situations.

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Here we have a absent father.

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It doesn't talk about

there being a grandfather.

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And, um, there, you know, the

parts of the Jewish faith.

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Um, the Timothy's mom has married a

Greek nonbeliever, so that what can

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you, can you see the marks going up now?

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Oops.

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Oops.

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Can you mother imagine if

that was your daughter?

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You know, a husband isn't present.

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She married a nonbeliever.

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You know, that would've been a challenge.

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But, you know, Lois didn't give up.

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Lois didn't cut her out.

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She wasn't sidelined.

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Like today in society if somebody

wrongs you, you just cut 'em out.

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You close them down, you cut 'em off.

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It's like they didn't exist.

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And I know life's tough and I don't

believe for one moment, lo um,

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endorse, you know, that relationship.

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What she did, she continued

to love her daughter.

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Can you imagine if she'd

have caught her off?

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She would've LA lost the

opportunity to love her daughter

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and to love her grandson.

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I hope that makes sense to you.

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I'm just trying to show you that,

you know, the Bible isn't just full

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of ideal situations, but it's full

of an amazing God who imp inputs

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our life to give us grace, to be

graceful and gracious to people.

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Don't distance yourself.

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Don't, don't, don't have to.

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You know, there's a thing in the

way we, we just cut people off.

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They wrong us or disagree with

us, and we're told Cut them out.

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Cut them off.

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You know, the Bible

talks about restoration.

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Now listen, I know there are some

horrendous things that happen to

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people, you know, and we do have to

take people out, but in your heart,

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we're always looking for restoration.

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And it's funny, you know that we always

go to the worst possible scenario when we

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talk about restoration and forgiveness,

when everyday life is full of situations

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where we need to forgive people.

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Lois had encountered

Jesus the love of Jesus.

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She was a believer, she was a

follower and that is evidence.

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She courageously chose to stand.

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With her daughter.

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Can you imagine what the

neighbors would be saying, Joan,

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down at the shops, you know?

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But Lois had found something so

precious in the message of the gospel.

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She lived out this newfound

faith that she'd found in Jesus.

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It was active, it was real.

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You could touch it.

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It was evident.

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See, when we encounter

God, it becomes evident.

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'cause we change our attitudes

and our actions and our thinking

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and our words all start to change.

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They don't just go kaing overnight.

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It's a process and people

around us will see that.

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I mean, our daughters

and our grandchildren,

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loving God with all that we

have becomes very evident.

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We can, most of us can put

on a front for a short time,

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but Lois had her daughter and her

grandson, Timothy, living with her.

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Most of us can't keep up the act too long.

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We get undone at some point, but what

we do see over a period of time is

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the generosity and the loving kindness

of Lois and how she shows that.

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She has a true living, vibrant faith.

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She models all those things.

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All those things speak into the

brokenness of the people around her.

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Even her daughter, who by all accounts is

a single mom, Timothy as an absent dad.

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Both of those situations create a gap.

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Quite often, bitterness can fill those

gaps, but here you have a mom being

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a grandmom, being gracious and kind

and humble, and that AIDS healing.

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Okay.

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So it's all about as, as.

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Listen, we're just

ordinary people, aren't we?

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Um, as grandparents, um, most of

us, um, we've learned so much trying

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to raise our, um, our own children.

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And I know we've covered this,

but you know, if I, my experience

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has been as well, I've said to

men, can you write down all the

318

:

things you do really well as a dad?

319

:

You could give them a large stamp

and there'd still be space on it.

320

:

But if I said to 'em, what you

do really poorly, you could

321

:

give them a roll of wallpaper.

322

:

And most of them, especially men of

my age, would feel that 'cause they

323

:

think of what they all did wrong.

324

:

And yes, we do make mistakes,

but if we apologize and address

325

:

those situations, we move on.

326

:

And I think, you know, being a grandparent

for me, um, it's like you get a second go.

327

:

Mm.

328

:

To address some of those things

that you feel you did so poorly on?

329

:

Yeah, it, it, it's a real

privilege to be a grandparent.

330

:

We can always look back and

think, what can we do better?

331

:

And I'm sure there's

always things that we can,

332

:

don't concentrate and

stay on your failures.

333

:

Just address them and ask

God to strengthen you as you

334

:

continue to love your son or your

daughter and those grandchildren.

335

:

We are not there to critique how our

children, parents, we're there to support

336

:

them and we're there to support them, even

if they parent very differently from us.

337

:

We want to see.

338

:

We wanna see God moving in our families.

339

:

We wanna believe that God is establishing

something of his himself in us and Lois.

340

:

Investing continually just by being with

her daughter and with her son Timothy.

341

:

'cause you know, Timothy would've saw

how the grandma responded to the mom.

342

:

So if, um, Lois just criticized Eunice

all the time, he would've heard that.

343

:

But we wouldn't be saying the

things that we're saying about

344

:

her, if that's what he'd heard.

345

:

There's an impact that we have.

346

:

As grandparents, I really believe

today we like to call it legacy and

347

:

um, I believe what we sow in our

grandchildren gives us all legacy.

348

:

I really do.

349

:

I think it's a real, a real privilege

and I think we shouldn't be shy.

350

:

We shouldn't be slow to influence.

351

:

We shouldn't be slow to speak in, in, in

our family, we have a 13-year-old, two

352

:

12 year olds and two seven year olds.

353

:

And, um, we made a decision early

in life, um, in, in their life,

354

:

um, that their parents, it was too

costly to put them into childcare.

355

:

Mm.

356

:

And the parents were going back to work,

but it was too, it was too expensive.

357

:

So Julie and I, um, made the

decision that we would store

358

:

childcare looking after them.

359

:

I think it was three days

a week, then down to two.

360

:

And we, we had the privilege of

doing that and, and it was such,

361

:

it was really such a privilege.

362

:

Um, um, and we were so thankful.

363

:

But, you know, there was a cost involved

and there generally is a cost involved.

364

:

For us, there was a financial cost,

um, and there was a time cost and there

365

:

was an energy cost, you know, 'cause

we went, you know, in our mid twenties

366

:

or mid thirties anymore, we were older.

367

:

And um, and it was a real privilege.

368

:

And now we, we still, all our

kids thankfully live here within,

369

:

you know, probably within five

or 10 miles of where we live.

370

:

And, and I dunno how grandparents.

371

:

Cope when the kids live in another

city, nevermind in another country.

372

:

But we have this thing, um, just

a story of talk about influence.

373

:

Um, with all our kids, they come

and up pick 'em up on a Wednesday.

374

:

We from three different schools,

four different schools I should say.

375

:

And, um, we come back to us and we, Ethan,

we play games and Julie bakes with them.

376

:

Then one of the little ones goes off

home, but us, us that we go to bed.

377

:

Um, ju sleeps with the other girls in

the other room and um, they have this

378

:

thing where they love to hear Julie

tell stories, miracle stories they

379

:

call them, or things that God has done.

380

:

Not fairy tales or Joe blogs a story,

but things that God encounters that

381

:

Julie and I have had with God over the

years and they are just, I, I've walked

382

:

down, you can see the faces and it.

383

:

It, it's just amazing.

384

:

Um, and, and, and they love these stories.

385

:

They wanna know more and more and more.

386

:

Um, also, um, we'll have a little

break from it, um, at the moment,

387

:

but we frequently have, it's not

got a great name, but around tea

388

:

time, um, we have one good, one bad.

389

:

And you go round and you're not allowed

to talk, um, until it's your go.

390

:

And you say one good thing

that's happening to you.

391

:

Remember the age of these kids and one.

392

:

One bad thing and one

good thing, you know?

393

:

And that gives us opportunity to

hear, and we always say, you know,

394

:

shall we pray about that with them?

395

:

Uh, and yeah, and it's,

it's really quite intense.

396

:

And then we go back to

throwing food at each other.

397

:

Um, well, not quite, um,

not due, yeah, love, cheese.

398

:

But, um, you know, I'm, I'm not trying

to oversize, I'm just saying, you know,

399

:

the reality is that we, it's simple.

400

:

It's simple.

401

:

It's not childish.

402

:

But it is childlike.

403

:

Yeah.

404

:

And, and it's meaningful, you know,

because I, I remember, um, one, one of

405

:

our grandkids talking about her best

friend who was poorly, and I'm like,

406

:

well, what would you like us to do?

407

:

And, and I remember her

saying, well, let's pray.

408

:

So that's what we did.

409

:

We didn't have to coerce it into that.

410

:

And, and, you know, the

grandparent thing, it's a role

411

:

of influence is what I'm saying.

412

:

Let, let me just, um, finish

off with, it's about continuing.

413

:

To, to walk with our

kids and our grandkids.

414

:

You know, we shared our lives with 'em.

415

:

We don't want them to carry the burden of

our life, but we wanna share it with them.

416

:

Um, you know, we, we, we want, we

don't wanna be hiding or putting

417

:

some false front on with them.

418

:

We want them to know that we love Jesus.

419

:

And, um, our kids, grandkids will

come to church with us and they,

420

:

they see that, um, and we want them.

421

:

We want them to know the reality of

having a personal savior, and, and they

422

:

have to come to that point themselves.

423

:

You know, um, Paul says

this in, in two Timothy, um,

424

:

chapter three, verse 13 to 15.

425

:

It's an encouragement, but as for you

continue, continue in what you have

426

:

learned and have become convinced of.

427

:

Wasn't that great, Ike, because

you know those from who you answer.

428

:

You knew.

429

:

You knew it was your nan,

you knew it was your mum.

430

:

And how from infancy you have known the

holy scriptures, which are able to make

431

:

you wise for salvation in Jesus Christ.

432

:

And if you, you're a mom or a

dad, or a grandparents, I want you

433

:

to know, be confident in all the

seed you have sown into your kids.

434

:

Regardless where your kids

may be at this moment.

435

:

Be confident that there'll be a,

a good harvest from that seed?

436

:

No, I can just, I imagine you, you know,

um, Timothy loving his nan and loving,

437

:

you know, um, the time that he had with

her as at the time he had with his mum.

438

:

But, you know, we need to invest in those.

439

:

We need to invest in those times.

440

:

Uh, my buy five grandkids

are all very different.

441

:

Um, like yesterday, um, the, um, the

eldest we went to see, um, Everton.

442

:

Now you might think that is child cruelty,

but um, we won so it wasn't too bad.

443

:

Um, but some of the

others wouldn't want that.

444

:

So don't force them to

do something you want.

445

:

You know, find out what it is they like.

446

:

Our two younger ones love

being together, you know?

447

:

Um, preschool, they were

together most of the week.

448

:

They just love being together so much.

449

:

So, um, a girl and a boy, the

little girl had to have the

450

:

same clothes as the little boy.

451

:

I mean, coats, you know, and the

same wellies and the same hats.

452

:

They just love being together,

you know, and, and, and we

453

:

just love to celebrate that.

454

:

No, you see, you can celebrate it or you

can try and change everything, or you can

455

:

try and, um, make every, each of these

individuals conform into what you want.

456

:

Rather than just enjoying them.

457

:

Yeah.

458

:

And then on next two up, the two 12 year

olds, we have great memories of us running

459

:

across a bridge down at Albert Dock.

460

:

And um, I think Julie had one of them

and I had the other one and we're

461

:

a little bit competitive and one of

them actually shouted, he's dragging

462

:

me, you know, so that became a bit

of a tagline for about 10 years.

463

:

And, you know, and it's, it's not aim.

464

:

It's not a mocking thing,

it's a term of endearment,

465

:

Matt Edmundson: mocking.

466

:

Dave Connolly: So when we talk

about, we're talk about something

467

:

that we enjoyed, it's a love thing.

468

:

And you know, um, there's a culture

that we'll try and overcome your

469

:

culture that try and overcome

your standards and your the things

470

:

that are precious to your family.

471

:

And I wanna encourage you, moms.

472

:

Dads, grandparents, tell your

grandkids all the amazing things

473

:

that God has done in your life.

474

:

Dare to do that.

475

:

So faith into them.

476

:

Yeah.

477

:

Talk to them.

478

:

Tell them about things that you're praying

for and how God has come and moved in.

479

:

You know, let's have that, um, type

of, um, faith that those type of

480

:

actions that Eunice had, you know,

where said she had a sincere faith.

481

:

I want that set of me.

482

:

Matt Edmundson: Yeah.

483

:

Dave Connolly: You know, when, when

you know when if, if, if I'm gone or

484

:

my grandkids are growing up, I want

them to remember me as that, that.

485

:

You know, Gangan had a real sincere faith.

486

:

He loved Jesus.

487

:

That was the most important thing to him.

488

:

Not that they aren't important,

they are more important because

489

:

of my sincere love of God.

490

:

So I hope there's something in that talk

that you can connect with God bless.

491

:

Matt Edmundson: Wonderful.

492

:

What a great talk.

493

:

Uh, thanks Dave.

494

:

We're gonna get into some of

the things that Dave says.

495

:

If you've got any questions, any thoughts,

any comments, any stories, uh, put them

496

:

in the comments below, especially if

you've got any comments or thoughts or

497

:

stories about your own grandparents.

498

:

Um, I would love that.

499

:

Or if you, if you're a

grandparent yourself, tell

500

:

stories about your grandkids.

501

:

Mm-hmm.

502

:

We're gonna come onto that in just

a second, but before we do, um.

503

:

Uh, Dave, as you were talking, I was

kind of reminded my grandparents,

504

:

I'm sure your grandparents as

well were involved in the war.

505

:

They were right.

506

:

Uh, the World War II today in

the UK is Remembrance Sunday

507

:

if you're outside of the uk.

508

:

Um, what do they call it in the States?

509

:

Uh, Memorial Day, isn It Memorial Day is

I think what they call it in the States.

510

:

It's basically just a day to

remember those that have gone into

511

:

war and fought for our freedoms.

512

:

Mm-hmm.

513

:

Um, it's not a.

514

:

That it's not a political thing,

it's just a, a time just to reflect.

515

:

And my, my grandparents fought in

the Great War and well in World War

516

:

ii, not necessarily the Great War.

517

:

Um, my grandparents fought there, Sharon,

my wife, her grandparents were in that.

518

:

Were your grandparents

involved in the war?

519

:

Dave Connolly: Yeah.

520

:

Yeah, absolutely.

521

:

Matt Edmundson: Yeah.

522

:

Dave Connolly: Yeah.

523

:

Matt Edmundson: Um, and yours?

524

:

Jan Burch: Yeah.

525

:

My, my grand one grandfather

was, yeah, he's in the Navy.

526

:

Yeah.

527

:

Royal Navy.

528

:

Matt Edmundson: Yeah.

529

:

Really interesting.

530

:

And, um.

531

:

Sharon, my wife, I remember we

sat down Wong and talked with

532

:

him before he passed away.

533

:

Sharon really wanted to understand

his story more, which I want,

534

:

we're gonna get into a little bit.

535

:

Um, but he was there in D-Day.

536

:

Dave Connolly: Mm-hmm.

537

:

Matt Edmundson: You know, and dunk Kirk

and, um, the evacuation of dunk Kirk,

538

:

he was involved with that and he was

one of the sailors on the beach waiting.

539

:

Uh, one of the sailors, one of

the army guys on the beach, he

540

:

was driving a, a munitions wagon.

541

:

He got the order just

to leave it and just.

542

:

Get to the beach as quickly as he could.

543

:

Um, and it was at this point actually

Hitler, for whatever reason, did

544

:

not press his advantage where he

could have won the war but didn't.

545

:

Uh, interestingly, there was a national

day of Prayer called by the king on

546

:

this day as well, which is, it's not

a coincidence in my mind to be found.

547

:

You know, those two things

kind of go together.

548

:

Um.

549

:

And we should have, the ally should

have lost the war that day but didn't,

550

:

and, and God was very gracious with us.

551

:

Um, and so maybe you still have

family members or maybe you have

552

:

stories of family members that

you remember fought in the war.

553

:

Maybe actually you don't.

554

:

And it's like, why are we still talking

ut a war that happened in the:

555

:

Either way.

556

:

Um, I think it's just right just to take

some time and just to say thank you, uh,

557

:

for all these men and women that fought

for the freedom in which we now live.

558

:

Um, we wanted to do

that as a church, right?

559

:

Dave Connolly: It's important for

us to remember even today, the men

560

:

and women who are serving, you know,

around the world, um, and who were

561

:

losing their lives for our freedom.

562

:

Mm-hmm.

563

:

Which I think we take really.

564

:

Lightly really.

565

:

Um, and all these, you know, the

conflicts, whether it was four

566

:

ones, Northern Ireland, Iraq, Iran,

you know, men and women's store.

567

:

Yeah.

568

:

You know, losing their lives for our

freedom, for the freedom of other

569

:

people, and yet we forget so easily.

570

:

Yeah, so quickly.

571

:

Matt Edmundson: Yeah, we do, we do.

572

:

And of course there's a lot of

wars going on at the moment.

573

:

Like you say, there's the, obviously

the Ukraine, Russia war course, there's

574

:

Israel guys, there's, oh, there's

the Christians being persecuted.

575

:

I mean, there's all

kinds of things going on.

576

:

Um, not to pick out one

over the other, but um.

577

:

War is horrific.

578

:

And the men and women who lay

their down life down in, in war,

579

:

we should be grateful for those.

580

:

Mm-hmm.

581

:

Um, but there will become, there will

come a day where there is no more war.

582

:

Um, and this is one of the things

I'm looking forward to, um, in,

583

:

you know, in eternity is there's no

more war, there's no more bloodshed.

584

:

Um, yeah.

585

:

Jan Burch: And.

586

:

Matt Edmundson: But I'm grateful

for the people that have done that.

587

:

So, remembrance Sunday, uh, I think

we should probably pray and then we'll

588

:

crack on with Conversation Street.

589

:

So, Lord, thank you for, uh, the men

and women who have gone before us.

590

:

Thank you for all of those

that gave their lives.

591

:

Dave Connolly: Mm-hmm.

592

:

Matt Edmundson: Lord.

593

:

Dave Connolly: Yeah,

594

:

Matt Edmundson: we don't always get it.

595

:

We don't get the conflict.

596

:

We don't always understand

who's right or wrong,

597

:

but Lord, we know that there's.

598

:

The sacrifice made by men and women to

try and keep the freedoms that we have.

599

:

And we remember those today, and

we thank you for all of them,

600

:

for all of those lives, our men.

601

:

Jan Burch: Amen.

602

:

Matt Edmundson: Okay, so,

um, grandparents, now there's

603

:

two ways to think about Dave,

what you were talking about.

604

:

Number one, you are a grandparent,

which is why I was really keen

605

:

you did the talk, which is great.

606

:

It's much better you do it than me, right?

607

:

Because I, I'm not a grandparent yet, yet.

608

:

I just wanna point that out.

609

:

Jan Burch: Hurry.

610

:

Are you?

611

:

Oh, you,

612

:

Matt Edmundson: I'm in.

613

:

Like, I'm really looking forward to

having grand babies, but just not yet.

614

:

Yeah.

615

:

And

616

:

Dave Connolly: no pressure of

617

:

Matt Edmundson: Yeah, my daughter's

on the, um, and uh, obviously there's

618

:

also the point of view as someone

who has had grandparents, right?

619

:

All my grandparents have passed away.

620

:

Um, and so I thought it'd be great to

think about it from, from both sides.

621

:

So let's start from the, the

grandparent side of things.

622

:

I love what you were picking out on.

623

:

One of the phrases that sort of

spring to my mind as you was talking

624

:

is as Christians we should think

in generations and not years.

625

:

Absolutely.

626

:

And the Bible, there's always this

thing isn't there with generations like.

627

:

God was the God of Abraham, Isaac,

and Jacob, and he referred to

628

:

these sort of three generations

in Proverbs, I think it is.

629

:

It says A good man leaves an

inheritance for his children's children.

630

:

Right?

631

:

Um.

632

:

And I think again in Deuteronomy

it says, you know, fear the Lord

633

:

so that your children and that your

grandchildren will also fear the, there

634

:

seems to be this thing about generation

of three isn't there in scripture.

635

:

And, and thinking about that and actually

being the defendant and the guardian,

636

:

I suppose, of a family unit, both as

a parent but also as a grandparent,

637

:

I think is pretty significant.

638

:

Yeah,

639

:

Dave Connolly: and I think, I

mean, I'm just, you know, with

640

:

cancel culture that threatens that.

641

:

You know, because you just cut people out

and, um, I think there's so much that we,

642

:

that, you know, we need to understand,

you know, the, the Hebrew culture, they,

643

:

they talked about the family, you know,

and, um, and, and they would, they.

644

:

It's just the way they communicated their

history and, and, and it's fantastic,

645

:

you know, and you know, I grew up,

um, and we had an extended family,

646

:

you know, uncle Fred, he wasn't really

your Uncle Fred, he just, your dad

647

:

borrowed a drill from him type of thing.

648

:

So both family was, seemed

to be more important.

649

:

Yeah.

650

:

Yeah.

651

:

Where today because of can cancel culture,

if mom or dad says something you don't

652

:

like, you are encouraged to cut them out.

653

:

Cut them off.

654

:

Um, now I'm just talking about, you

know, they have a different beliefs.

655

:

You know, they vote differently

than you, or they have a

656

:

different opinion on something.

657

:

You are encouraged to cut them off.

658

:

And sadly, I would've to say there's

an increasing, um, I, I've experienced

659

:

an increase in hearing of what I,

I'll call so-called professional

660

:

counselors, encouraging that.

661

:

Now I'm not talking about

abusive relationships.

662

:

Okay.

663

:

Yeah.

664

:

And it isn't abuse.

665

:

If I don't agree with you.

666

:

Matt Edmundson: Yeah, that's very true.

667

:

Yeah.

668

:

Dave Connolly: You know, we're, we're,

we're being told it is, and it isn't,

669

:

you know, we should be able to respect,

I should be able to respect somebody

670

:

else's point of view and, and be

free to disagree with it, you know?

671

:

So, um, I think there is a

threat to the generational thing.

672

:

Um, if we had council culture,

we need to honor, you know, I'll

673

:

show up in a minute, but you know.

674

:

I grew up with an absent

mom and dad, you know?

675

:

Um.

676

:

I just only goki, you know, we lived

in terrace streets and, um, I sold what

677

:

he called sofa surf, you know, from

a very, very early age into my teen.

678

:

I didn't have any real, you know,

family, you know, to, to talk of.

679

:

But I, I, I, I, I've learned that

my, I believe my mom and dad thought

680

:

that they were doing the best.

681

:

Yeah.

682

:

If they knew what was happening to me,

I think they would've killed somebody.

683

:

Matt Edmundson: Yeah.

684

:

Dave Connolly: And, um.

685

:

But, you know, broken people

and dysfunctional people,

686

:

they didn't know the Lord.

687

:

You know, you can only give what you

have, you know, and they, they weren't

688

:

able to give it, give me anything near.

689

:

But you know what, um, as I became a

Christian, somehow in God, I was found.

690

:

So much more grace for them.

691

:

And, and it, you know, I really

believe it's quite life changing

692

:

for me and um, and we are privilege

of leading them to the Lord.

693

:

Mm-hmm.

694

:

And without finding that grace, I don't

believe we could have been part of that.

695

:

Yeah.

696

:

You know?

697

:

'cause we would, I would've

still been two hairs so lovely.

698

:

You know, by.

699

:

Matt Edmundson: That's powerful, man.

700

:

Yeah, that's really powerful.

701

:

Jan Burch: That, that's really special.

702

:

Um, I was, I was just reminded about

the scripture that says God puts

703

:

the, the lonely and family, families,

and, um, whether that is your natural

704

:

biological family or whether it's

a different family, but we're not

705

:

ever meant to be on our own in life.

706

:

No.

707

:

Um, you know, some people are proud of

the fact that they say that they don't

708

:

need people, they don't need anyone

or, or I, you know, I've got rid of

709

:

people that cause me trouble or pain.

710

:

Um, but I, I just really think it's very

evident, isn't it, in the Bible that.

711

:

God, God puts us in family.

712

:

Yeah.

713

:

Um, and I think it's really precious.

714

:

I, I loved what you said Dave, about,

um, almost like protecting what we've got

715

:

and, you know, the world is so quick to.

716

:

Get rid of or, or destroy

some of those relationships.

717

:

And we, we've got to be

on our guard for that.

718

:

And, um, and I just loved all this, what

you said about what you do with your

719

:

grandchildren and, you know, I just think

you've probably a, a gorgeous granddad.

720

:

Dave Connolly: Mean we

are not perfect, you know?

721

:

No, probably.

722

:

Jan Burch: Why aren't you, Dave?

723

:

Dave Connolly: Um,

724

:

Jan Burch: you've had, you've had years of

725

:

Dave Connolly: turn me back.

726

:

But, you know, it's, it's,

it, it's, it's such a great

727

:

opportunity, you know, I mean, one.

728

:

The last two, you know,

before they went to school.

729

:

Um, you know, you get to, you're

getting older, you know, you start off

730

:

and then some mill who's 13 and the

two younger ones out there, seven, but

731

:

you know, around just before they go,

went through to school on a Friday.

732

:

It was like the four minutes

late picking them up.

733

:

And it wasn't 'cause we didn't

love them, we were just exhausted.

734

:

I mean, it had them for three days

and we had to say, if we didn't

735

:

get dressed immediately and go out.

736

:

We were going to bed.

737

:

Yeah, because you so tired.

738

:

So there is a cost, you know,

in it, but there should be.

739

:

Matt Edmundson: Yeah,

740

:

Jan Burch: yeah.

741

:

Matt Edmundson: And it's a cost

you're willing to pay, right?

742

:

Dave Connolly: Yeah.

743

:

Matt Edmundson: In a

744

:

Dave Connolly: heartbeat.

745

:

But, but, you know, it, the, the, the,

the, you know, as I said, you know,

746

:

for us, you know, there's a financial

cost 'cause no due, couldn't work.

747

:

And, um.

748

:

And we were happy to do that.

749

:

And, you know, you, you lose three

days where you could be doing such and

750

:

such and you know, you're not, you're

too tired to do anything that evening.

751

:

Yeah.

752

:

And, and I think you just have to be

realistic and say it's for a season and

753

:

we see photos come up on our time Cliff.

754

:

You know, we don't, it's not

that I hate Facebook or anything.

755

:

Well, you know, when, when, when they,

they come up, you know, and, and, and

756

:

we had actually moved to ca there was

one the other day, one of the little

757

:

ones where she bought three mm-hmm.

758

:

In Speak Hall and jump.

759

:

It's great with your grandkids.

760

:

They do all the things you

wouldn't allow your kids to.

761

:

My kids say you would've

killed us all two.

762

:

Picture these two little ones, they

must have been three and a half

763

:

or before in Speak Hall with the

rain suits on with a shower proof.

764

:

Go jump into this water.

765

:

Honestly, lying down in it, you know?

766

:

And, and me and Julie are really proud.

767

:

Matt Edmundson: Yeah.

768

:

Dave Connolly: You know, watching

it, you know, and our kids like.

769

:

Yeah, you've killed us.

770

:

I'm like, yeah, we probably, we

probably wouldn't have been able to, um,

771

:

afford the, um, the, the shower suit,

nevermind, you know, or the wellies.

772

:

Matt Edmundson: That's an

interesting point though, isn't it?

773

:

Because generations, I think there's

the, when the Bible talks about

774

:

obviously leaving an inheritance for

your children's children, there is

775

:

the spiritual inheritance, the legacy,

but there's also, there's wealth.

776

:

Right.

777

:

And wealth changes massively, I

think from generation to generation.

778

:

Mm-hmm.

779

:

The wealth that I have grow that I

grew up with is very different to

780

:

what my kids have grown up with.

781

:

Yeah's True.

782

:

And that's not because I've got a

better job, it's just because more

783

:

stuff is just readily available.

784

:

Mm-hmm.

785

:

Right.

786

:

Um, and so it is

interesting, you know, how.

787

:

We didn't do that when

you were growing up.

788

:

'cause that didn't exist or

we didn't have the money.

789

:

No.

790

:

You're

791

:

Dave Connolly: too busy.

792

:

Matt Edmundson: Yeah,

793

:

Jan Burch: I think travel.

794

:

Um, I think when I look back to my

childhood and my parents' childhood, we

795

:

definitely travel a lot more, don't we?

796

:

As a family.

797

:

Yeah.

798

:

Um, now, so greater opportunities

for our children and their children.

799

:

You know, my dad, you know, was 40 when

he first went to Spain, whereas, you

800

:

know, our children have been going abroad

since they were Kneehigh, you know?

801

:

Yeah.

802

:

Yeah.

803

:

So, um, yeah, I think that's true.

804

:

Yeah.

805

:

Matt Edmundson: Yeah.

806

:

Dave Connolly: I mean, I, I

know Julie took him one of our.

807

:

She's 12 now.

808

:

Um, on a mission trip into Holland,

it was like a, it was like a,

809

:

um, pastoral mission thing.

810

:

Jan Burch: Yeah.

811

:

Brilliant.

812

:

Dave Connolly: And the couple, they

had a young girl that age, you know,

813

:

and I think, I think I can't wait

to take, um, needs, gotta move on.

814

:

Um, you know, mill big girls,

um, you know, on a mission

815

:

trip somewhere, you know?

816

:

Yeah.

817

:

Fantastic.

818

:

Um, because there's something

special about doing together.

819

:

Matt Edmundson: Definitely.

820

:

There is Absolutely.

821

:

In the comments.

822

:

Um.

823

:

Louise put about her granddad, who's no

longer with us, uh, was also in the war.

824

:

And I think that's a common thing

actually for a certain generation.

825

:

Our grandparents were still in the war.

826

:

Uh, Ellis wrote, put my teeth back in.

827

:

Glad to see grandparents get

in the love they deserve.

828

:

Uh, lived with mine since I was six.

829

:

Oh, wow.

830

:

And Heather wrote, um, I don't

use this term lightly, but.

831

:

Uh, they, her grandparents were

angels in human form and got

832

:

her through her younger life.

833

:

Um, I want to be every bit as good as

they are when any grandkids come my way.

834

:

Jan Burch: Amen.

835

:

Yeah.

836

:

Dave Connolly: You know what,

837

:

Jan Burch: me too.

838

:

Dave Connolly: This is all about

legacy when we talk about our

839

:

grandparents, um, you know, um, and

just honor them and culture today.

840

:

I'm not, I'm not trying

to be a grumpy old man.

841

:

I just feel that it's in

contention to scripture.

842

:

Scripture talks about honoring, you

know, and, um, you know, some of, some

843

:

of these grandparents, um, who were in

the war, for instance, they saw things

844

:

and, and, and people in the armed

forces, like they're seeing things that.

845

:

People should not see.

846

:

Yeah.

847

:

Experience things as young men, you know?

848

:

And um, you know, so when they come

home from war, of course that's

849

:

gonna have an impact on the family.

850

:

Mm-hmm.

851

:

Of course that's gonna have an

impact on those grandchildren.

852

:

Um, and, but you know, it's, it's great to

hear you talk about, you know, you want to

853

:

be like your grandparents, but you know.

854

:

They will have learned, um, whether it

was your mom or your dad's grandparent,

855

:

you know, um, I bet you if you spoke

to them, they would say they learnt

856

:

a lot by being a parent and that's

why they were such good grandparents.

857

:

Yeah, yeah.

858

:

You know, 'cause um, when my kids

say, dad, you would've killed us.

859

:

They don't say it anymore.

860

:

Um, and, and, and my

response is simply this.

861

:

That's because, um, oh, we had three

kids all very close to each other.

862

:

Mm-hmm.

863

:

And, um.

864

:

And, and I say to them, that's

because I was uptight and grumpy.

865

:

And rather than just enjoy it, I

was trying to learn how to be a dad.

866

:

Jan Burch: It's a different

stage of your life.

867

:

Yeah.

868

:

Dave, so you were working

869

:

Dave Connolly: Yeah.

870

:

Jan Burch: Full time.

871

:

You know, and Yeah.

872

:

Yeah.

873

:

That, that's the way it is, isn't it?

874

:

It's, yeah.

875

:

You didn't love them less?

876

:

Dave Connolly: No.

877

:

But don't, you know, don't

this, you know, I, I.

878

:

Honor people.

879

:

Mm.

880

:

Honor, you know, honor them

whilst you've got them.

881

:

'cause

882

:

Jan Burch: Oh yeah.

883

:

Dave Connolly: You know what

the, there, there comes a

884

:

time when you don't have them.

885

:

Jan Burch: Yeah.

886

:

Dave Connolly: And, um, you,

whether they, they were good, bad

887

:

or indifferent parents, you know,

I would encourage you to find

888

:

something just to appreciate them on.

889

:

Jan Burch: Absolutely.

890

:

Dave Connolly: Because once

that's gone, it's gone.

891

:

Matt Edmundson: Yeah.

892

:

Dave Connolly: And, and, you

know, you will, you will.

893

:

Be sorry that you didn't Mm.

894

:

You know,

895

:

Matt Edmundson: I think I'd, if I, if I

put my grandson hat on and think about my

896

:

grandparents, um, I didn't know two of my

grandparents had died before I was born.

897

:

One of my, my granddads, he

died when I was really young.

898

:

I have like one memory of him.

899

:

And then my mum's mum, she passed

away, um, a few years ago before,

900

:

well, quite a few years ago now.

901

:

Um, and.

902

:

So I grew up really with

a, just a grandmother.

903

:

And one of the things that I didn't

do as a teenager, which I regret doing

904

:

now, not doing now, which is what Sharon

did with her grandparents, was to sit

905

:

'em down and go, tell me your stories.

906

:

Dave Connolly: Absolutely.

907

:

Matt Edmundson: Because when I

was a teenager, I could care less.

908

:

Yeah, yeah.

909

:

Right.

910

:

I'm, I'm playing football or I'm

watching Dallas, or whatever it is

911

:

we did back then in the eighties.

912

:

Do you know what I mean?

913

:

Um, and I, I regret not.

914

:

Not hearing their stories.

915

:

Jan Burch: Yeah, yeah.

916

:

Matt Edmundson: Um, and I, and I, I

think if I could go back into, you

917

:

know, if you can go back in time and do

something different, what would you do?

918

:

I, I'd talk to my grandma and

just get her stories from her.

919

:

Jan Burch: Yeah.

920

:

Dave Connolly: And they have got

stories and they're not fictional,

921

:

you know, they're real life stories,

so they might be a little bit, you

922

:

know, not, not very pretty, and maybe

not even pc, but it's their story.

923

:

And, you know, I'd encourage you

to listen to that if you, you know.

924

:

If you have grandparents, I'd really

encourage you to look at your diary and to

925

:

say how often you're seeing them because

there will come a time, you know, Nan,

926

:

I'll come round and see you, granddad.

927

:

I'll come and see you.

928

:

And life being, life you don't.

929

:

Hmm.

930

:

So all those planned things

seldom don't wanna happen.

931

:

Matt Edmundson: Mm-hmm.

932

:

Dave Connolly: And basically what

we're saying is that, you know,

933

:

as importance as these other

things, you're no longer required.

934

:

And I, I can, that just

makes me feel so sad.

935

:

Matt Edmundson: Mm-hmm.

936

:

Dave Connolly: You know that,

especially where, where.

937

:

Grandparents have had a, a

significant impact on you.

938

:

Mm.

939

:

You know, maybe you've gone

on summer holidays with them.

940

:

Um, I still take in my, our

grandchildren as they were growing up.

941

:

I'd take them out on my own, um, to North

Wales on the beach, and we've got loads

942

:

of pictures, just set no money, just sat

on the beach throwing pebbles into water,

943

:

you know, and those pebbles are free.

944

:

Jan Burch: Yeah.

945

:

Yeah.

946

:

Dave Connolly: But the

experience, you couldn't buy.

947

:

No.

948

:

You could not buy that.

949

:

No.

950

:

And even now, um, we still, when we go to

the beach, we, we were just, we were in

951

:

Italy, just, um, in, earlier in the year,

um, first thing we wanted to do was go to

952

:

the beach and throw stones in the water.

953

:

Mm-hmm.

954

:

You know, mum and dad thought

we're allowed to come because

955

:

there are too many questions.

956

:

Why we And what you might get wet.

957

:

Yeah.

958

:

Don't care.

959

:

Jan Burch: Yeah,

960

:

Dave Connolly: those clothes will dry.

961

:

Jan Burch: It's

962

:

Dave Connolly: lovely, but

those memories won't fade.

963

:

Jan Burch: Yeah.

964

:

My, um, my mom is, um, and Tim's mom, my

husband, the, those two women are, I'm

965

:

telling you, have got it to be honored.

966

:

But, um, and Tim's dad, my, my

dad had died before I got married.

967

:

Um.

968

:

Um, but they've had, they've been

significant in my children's life.

969

:

Um, I mean, still to this day, my mom

still, you know, would come round at the

970

:

drop of her hat and she used, she did my

childcare, um, when I went back to work.

971

:

And my kids absolutely adore, adore her.

972

:

Dave Connolly: Yeah.

973

:

Jan Burch: Um, but yeah.

974

:

And, and Tim's mom's completely different.

975

:

She's much more, um Right.

976

:

You know, my mom's more sort of

cuddly and, um, whereas Tim's

977

:

mom does baking with them and,

you know, gives some tasks to do.

978

:

Yeah.

979

:

Um, takes them out to historical places.

980

:

And both different things they've done

have been brilliant memories for them.

981

:

You know,

982

:

Dave Connolly: they're unique.

983

:

Jan Burch: Yeah.

984

:

Dave Connolly: They don't have to, those

grandparents aren't in competition.

985

:

Jan Burch: No, no.

986

:

That's right.

987

:

Dave Connolly: You know, we had

bonfire night, um, early last

988

:

week in our house and um, my

daughters, um, she's got two girls.

989

:

Um, her husband's, um.

990

:

Yeah, parents come round, you

know, and for the last few years

991

:

we've done it together and me

and him we're like naughty boys.

992

:

And, um, but we've been teaching the

eldest, uh, Miller, how to take control.

993

:

And she, we, we will hand

over the firework duties.

994

:

So I, you know, she's 13 and, um, not, not

now, you know, a little bit further way.

995

:

Jan Burch: Yeah,

996

:

Dave Connolly: yeah.

997

:

And we do all the right precautions,

but we still notice both.

998

:

Yeah.

999

:

Good.

:

00:51:07,260 --> 00:51:10,230

But what we want us to see is that

we're, now, we're very different.

:

00:51:10,260 --> 00:51:11,640

He's not, he's not a Christian yet.

:

00:51:11,820 --> 00:51:12,090

Jan Burch: Yeah.

:

00:51:12,120 --> 00:51:16,140

Dave Connolly: But he's a lovely

man, you know, and, um, I, I

:

00:51:16,140 --> 00:51:17,370

just, I love being with him.

:

00:51:17,370 --> 00:51:18,060

He's great fun.

:

00:51:18,510 --> 00:51:18,750

Jan Burch: Mm-hmm.

:

00:51:19,830 --> 00:51:22,830

Dave Connolly: We enjoy being together

and she enjoys doing it with us.

:

00:51:22,919 --> 00:51:25,055

And that's what, that is the lesson.

:

00:51:25,375 --> 00:51:25,774

Jan Burch: I love her

:

00:51:26,040 --> 00:51:27,810

Dave Connolly: that we,

we are not in competition.

:

00:51:27,834 --> 00:51:28,055

No,

:

00:51:28,319 --> 00:51:28,379

Jan Burch: no.

:

00:51:28,470 --> 00:51:30,660

Dave Connolly: We just

wanna love and love freely.

:

00:51:30,660 --> 00:51:30,720

Yeah.

:

00:51:31,950 --> 00:51:32,129

Matt Edmundson: Yeah.

:

00:51:32,549 --> 00:51:33,180

So good.

:

00:51:33,839 --> 00:51:37,140

I think we could spend the whole night

talking about grandparents, couldn't we?

:

00:51:38,220 --> 00:51:42,270

Uh, and you know, whether it's

because of stories that we've heard

:

00:51:42,270 --> 00:51:43,770

or stories that we regret not hearing.

:

00:51:44,205 --> 00:51:44,625

Um,

:

00:51:44,654 --> 00:51:45,045

Jan Burch: yeah.

:

00:51:45,049 --> 00:51:45,069

Yeah.

:

00:51:45,524 --> 00:51:49,545

Matt Edmundson: I think my takeaway

for this evening, actually, I just

:

00:51:49,545 --> 00:51:52,605

entering that phase of life now

where Josh, my Eldes is engaged.

:

00:51:52,605 --> 00:51:54,915

He's getting married in April.

:

00:51:54,975 --> 00:51:55,575

Is that right, Zoe?

:

00:51:56,055 --> 00:51:58,545

Um, so he's getting married in April.

:

00:51:58,605 --> 00:52:01,904

It's gonna be a few years before

they have grandkids, I'm assuming,

:

00:52:01,964 --> 00:52:02,984

uh, before they have grandkids.

:

00:52:02,984 --> 00:52:04,634

Definitely a few years

before they have grandkids.

:

00:52:06,674 --> 00:52:11,595

A few things have gotta happen

first, um, a few years before.

:

00:52:11,654 --> 00:52:12,795

Um, they have kids.

:

00:52:13,305 --> 00:52:17,235

Um, and if they're able, you

know, and I, I, we got to sit

:

00:52:17,235 --> 00:52:20,625

down with Josh's fiance's parents.

:

00:52:20,685 --> 00:52:23,475

So Abby's parents who we're gonna

go see tomorrow in the Netherlands.

:

00:52:24,135 --> 00:52:26,565

Um, and we got to pray over

our kids, which was great.

:

00:52:27,525 --> 00:52:31,185

And we got to, the first time we met

them, we start talking about grand babies.

:

00:52:32,310 --> 00:52:36,870

No pressure kids, but, you know, and,

um, I think we'll just be marriage.

:

00:52:37,259 --> 00:52:37,560

Yeah.

:

00:52:37,589 --> 00:52:38,730

Well they've gotta get married first.

:

00:52:38,730 --> 00:52:38,895

Yeah, yeah.

:

00:52:38,895 --> 00:52:39,779

Then yeah, yeah, yeah.

:

00:52:39,779 --> 00:52:41,940

There's a, a line, a progression.

:

00:52:42,330 --> 00:52:46,350

Um, so I'm in this sort of phase of life

where I'm like, I'm too young to be a

:

00:52:46,350 --> 00:52:48,210

granddad, but actually I'm probably not.

:

00:52:48,339 --> 00:52:52,419

And the reality of life is it's

maybe five, 10 years away and that,

:

00:52:52,450 --> 00:52:53,830

you know, that's gonna change.

:

00:52:54,009 --> 00:52:55,930

And you know what, I'm starting

to really look forward to it now.

:

00:52:55,935 --> 00:52:56,680

Yeah, yeah.

:

00:52:56,680 --> 00:53:01,149

And I love what you were saying

about shaping, you know, influence

:

00:53:01,149 --> 00:53:04,509

or shaping and not just, you know,

going, oh, I've done my job with

:

00:53:04,509 --> 00:53:05,980

the kids, the rest is up to them.

:

00:53:06,279 --> 00:53:09,430

But actually still as a grandfather

taking on that grandfather role,

:

00:53:09,430 --> 00:53:13,930

telling their stories about God's

faithfulness and shaping my grandkids

:

00:53:14,230 --> 00:53:16,689

into, um, their journey as well.

:

00:53:16,689 --> 00:53:16,710

I'd love

:

00:53:16,710 --> 00:53:16,865

Jan Burch: that as well.

:

00:53:16,865 --> 00:53:16,875

Yeah.

:

00:53:18,120 --> 00:53:18,410

Matt Edmundson: Yeah.

:

00:53:18,680 --> 00:53:18,980

Jan Burch: Yeah, yeah.

:

00:53:18,980 --> 00:53:19,095

Amen.

:

00:53:19,850 --> 00:53:20,130

Matt Edmundson: Good.

:

00:53:20,130 --> 00:53:20,140

Amen.

:

00:53:20,625 --> 00:53:23,475

Um, so before we close down

the livestream, any further

:

00:53:23,475 --> 00:53:24,465

comments from you, my dear?

:

00:53:24,465 --> 00:53:25,635

Jan Burch: No, just really enjoyed it.

:

00:53:25,815 --> 00:53:26,595

Thanks Dave.

:

00:53:26,595 --> 00:53:32,295

And, um, I think, I think it's really

important to, you know, as, as you said,

:

00:53:32,295 --> 00:53:35,145

to honor our grandparents and our parents.

:

00:53:35,175 --> 00:53:35,235

Mm.

:

00:53:35,895 --> 00:53:36,225

Yeah.

:

00:53:36,765 --> 00:53:36,945

Matt Edmundson: Yeah.

:

00:53:36,945 --> 00:53:38,625

Any further comments from you, chief?

:

00:53:38,985 --> 00:53:39,195

Dave Connolly: No.

:

00:53:39,195 --> 00:53:40,065

I'm good at study.

:

00:53:40,245 --> 00:53:41,085

I said way enough

:

00:53:42,855 --> 00:53:43,755

Matt Edmundson: just goes to the comments.

:

00:53:43,845 --> 00:53:47,355

Um, Louise said here, I, she

agrees actually she would've

:

00:53:47,595 --> 00:53:50,205

asked more and listened to more

stories from her grandparents.

:

00:53:50,655 --> 00:53:54,195

One good thing is I have my

family history written down.

:

00:53:54,285 --> 00:53:54,435

Wow.

:

00:53:54,705 --> 00:53:58,695

And there are some good, uh,

about my granddad in there.

:

00:53:58,965 --> 00:54:00,525

I can always look at that in the photos.

:

00:54:00,525 --> 00:54:03,885

You know what, actually, one

thing Sharon's grandmother did.

:

00:54:03,940 --> 00:54:07,000

She wrote a book called Lost

and Found, which was her story.

:

00:54:07,840 --> 00:54:10,960

Um, talking about what it was like growing

up in the war and all that sort of stuff.

:

00:54:11,590 --> 00:54:13,270

Such a good thing to do.

:

00:54:13,330 --> 00:54:17,620

And I'm like, actually my, I

mean, for my grandkids, this, I, I

:

00:54:17,620 --> 00:54:19,060

appreciate technology is different.

:

00:54:19,420 --> 00:54:22,210

If they really wanted to, there's

hours and hours of videos they

:

00:54:22,210 --> 00:54:23,440

could watch of me talking.

:

00:54:23,500 --> 00:54:23,770

Right.

:

00:54:23,770 --> 00:54:24,670

Which I think is great.

:

00:54:24,670 --> 00:54:24,730

Yeah.

:

00:54:25,360 --> 00:54:29,660

But to write your story down like

that, that's such a good thing to do.

:

00:54:29,660 --> 00:54:29,785

Yeah.

:

00:54:30,225 --> 00:54:30,615

Jan Burch: Yeah.

:

00:54:30,645 --> 00:54:33,105

Matt Edmundson: Um, and if you are

a grandparent, can I encourage you?

:

00:54:33,135 --> 00:54:33,255

Yeah.

:

00:54:33,495 --> 00:54:35,475

Go write a book about your story?

:

00:54:35,475 --> 00:54:35,535

Yeah.

:

00:54:36,015 --> 00:54:39,705

Even if just, just your grandkids that

read it, um, it'll be such a wonderful

:

00:54:39,705 --> 00:54:40,935

possession to give them, I think.

:

00:54:41,385 --> 00:54:41,685

Dave Connolly: Yeah.

:

00:54:42,045 --> 00:54:42,435

Matt Edmundson: Amazing.

:

00:54:42,435 --> 00:54:43,605

Really amazing.

:

00:54:44,475 --> 00:54:45,555

Okay, well.

:

00:54:45,750 --> 00:54:47,130

I love this.

:

00:54:47,130 --> 00:54:49,560

Love the fact that at church

we can talk about grandparents

:

00:54:49,560 --> 00:54:50,850

and do that in a godly way.

:

00:54:50,850 --> 00:54:52,350

So thanks Dave for sharing that with us.

:

00:54:52,350 --> 00:54:52,860

Love the story.

:

00:54:52,860 --> 00:54:53,070

Pleasure.

:

00:54:53,490 --> 00:54:54,210

It was really good.

:

00:54:54,210 --> 00:54:55,230

Thanks John for being with us.

:

00:54:55,290 --> 00:54:55,470

Jan Burch: Thank you.

:

00:54:56,370 --> 00:54:58,740

Matt Edmundson: So what we're gonna

do now is we're gonna close this

:

00:54:58,740 --> 00:55:00,330

particular aspect of the live stream.

:

00:55:00,390 --> 00:55:06,300

Uh, so can you put in the comments again,

the URL, um, so in the comments is a url.

:

00:55:06,300 --> 00:55:08,880

Go Crowd Church slash meet.

:

00:55:09,330 --> 00:55:11,730

Um, Dan's gonna get his laptop ready.

:

00:55:12,855 --> 00:55:15,615

Q, Dan, uh, and we will see you.

:

00:55:15,675 --> 00:55:18,405

Um, I am in the, in the Google meet.

:

00:55:18,405 --> 00:55:19,455

Do come join us in there.

:

00:55:19,455 --> 00:55:22,665

Come and say how's it, uh,

come chat with us as we'll.

:

00:55:22,665 --> 00:55:24,915

Carrie, come talk, share your

stories about grandparents.

:

00:55:24,915 --> 00:55:27,075

Be good to hear them in there.

:

00:55:27,615 --> 00:55:30,705

Uh, so we're gonna probably take

about two minutes to do that.

:

00:55:31,095 --> 00:55:33,345

Um, but we're gonna end

the live stream now.

:

00:55:33,375 --> 00:55:38,279

This next week, uh, is Mark Buchanan.

:

00:55:39,030 --> 00:55:40,800

Talking about discipleship, your friends.

:

00:55:40,905 --> 00:55:41,195

Yeah.

:

00:55:41,195 --> 00:55:41,550

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

:

00:55:41,700 --> 00:55:44,760

So, uh, we've got, we're gonna do talk

about discipleship next week, so come

:

00:55:44,760 --> 00:55:46,260

join us without looking forward to that.

:

00:55:46,920 --> 00:55:49,530

Uh, but in the meantime, if you, if

we don't see you in the Google rooms,

:

00:55:49,710 --> 00:55:51,210

have a phenomenal week, wherever you

:

00:55:51,435 --> 00:55:51,475

Jan Burch: are.

:

00:55:51,475 --> 00:55:51,555

Yeah.

:

00:55:51,555 --> 00:55:52,170

Have a great week, everyone.

:

00:55:52,265 --> 00:55:52,650

Matt Edmundson: Yeah, yeah.

:

00:55:52,890 --> 00:55:53,490

Jan Burch: God bless.

:

00:55:53,520 --> 00:55:54,090

Matt Edmundson: God bless you.

:

00:55:54,180 --> 00:55:54,600

Bye for now.

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