Betsy, Jen, and Steph are back in person and excited to give all their best tips to help Christian moms order their days, weeks, and months! BUT FIRST, they're making sure our hearts are right. Instead of embracing routines, they point us to embrace a Savior. Rather than running to quick-fixes, they remind us to put on a posture of peace that only comes from a heart surrendered to Christ. They also seek to remove the shame we can feel from not knowing how to create systems for our lives. So many of us feel overwhelmed, but how did we get here?

Scriptures Referenced:

John 10:10

Psalm 127:2

Genesis 2:2-3

Hebrews 4:1-7

Lamentations 3:22-23, 27

Psalm 118:24

Psalm 16:3, 9

Proverbs 14:4

Psalm 90:12

Ephesians 2:10

Matthew 6:25-34

2 Corinthians 10:5

Proverbs 6:6-8

Philippians 4:6-7

Book Recommendation:

Growing In Gratitude By Mary Mohler

They're the joyful agains our children

shout on the swings, the exhausting

2

agains of cooking and laundry, and

the difficult agains of discipline.

3

So much of what we do

as mothers is on repeat.

4

So what if we woke up with clarity,

knowing which agains we were called

5

to, and went to bed believing we

are faithful in what matters most?

6

We believe God's Word is

the key to untangle from the

7

confusion and overwhelm we feel.

8

Let's look up together to embrace a

motherhood full of freedom and joy.

9

Stephanie: Today, I am in person

with Aunt Betsy and Jen, and we

10

are so excited to be together.

11

It's been almost a year, we are

recording in Tennessee today, and

12

we wanted to talk about scheduling.

13

and planning out our days, our

weeks, our months, and really

14

setting intention for our lives.

15

We notice that there is A commonality with

moms today of feeling very overwhelmed

16

and we want to practically help with that,

but first we want to remove some of the

17

shame of that and point to some cultural

movements that may have led to this.

18

It's easy to maybe wallow in it.

19

And we have a culture right now

that's embracing hot mess motherhood

20

and letting us sit there, but that's

not what the Lord would have for us.

21

Jen, what do you think has contributed

to this feeling of overwhelm and feeling

22

not equipped to really order our days?

23

Jen: Yeah, I think there are definitely

a number of things that have played into

24

this, but one of them is, That we as this

generation of Stephanie and my generation,

25

I don't feel like we were equipped.

26

We were not in school taught home ec.

27

We were not in school taught how to

run your household, how to handle

28

finances, how to handle meals

and cleaning and all the things.

29

Unless we had a stay at home mom.

30

I actually had a stay at home mom

and who was fantastic at all of

31

these, but she swung the opposite.

32

because her mom worked and she did

all of these for us because she didn't

33

want us to have to do them ourselves.

34

So there wasn't as much

teaching of how to do it.

35

She just did it for us.

36

But she had taken home back in

school and so she had learned

37

some of these from that.

38

But we see in Instagram and we see in

Pinterest and we see all these things

39

done with perfection and so much more.

40

Many things.

41

Everything has to be homemade

now and everything has to be done

42

perfectly and Instagram worthy.

43

And so I think that it can lead to

a sense of a deer in headlights.

44

Now what

45

,

I

46

I have to do this and I have to do

it well, but break it down for me.

47

What does this actually look

48

Stephanie: Yes,

49

it's almost paralyzing

the amount of information.

50

You might have a problem you're trying

to solve and then you go on and all of a

51

sudden, this flood of information makes

you feel like anything you're going to

52

do, It might not be good enough, or you

just don't quite know how to solve it,

53

or you're seeing all of these different

systems and none of them quite fits

54

your life, and then you just scroll

for a while and leave not solving the

55

problem, I think is what many moms are

turning to, and we can relate to that.

56

Aunt Betsy, you have a better perspective

of what's happened for a longer time.

57

I'm older.

58

But you've seen, the passing of

generations of what's happened for

59

this lack of equipping for mothers

60

Betsy: I look at my mom and she was

so very talented in hospitality.

61

Oh my goodness, she could cook, she could

sew, she could design, she could draw.

62

Very creative person.

63

And, really instilled a lot of those

things into us, except I never learned

64

how to sew a lick, and I wish I did.

65

Because she could even sew purses

and hats and complete matching

66

suits and extraordinary things.

67

She designed shop windows when she was in

college at the finest department stores.

68

And I just really marveled

at her ability and she really

69

encouraged us in a lot of things.

70

Honestly, I never took home ec myself.

71

I took all the sciences.

72

I was very interested in that area of

study so but we bought a restaurant

73

when I think I was 12 years old

and that forced me to Learn how to

74

do a lot of some of those skills.

75

So I don't necessarily think that it's

You know, necessarily your home situation,

76

except to say that the things that were

happening, the movements of the time,

77

when I went to high school and college,

there was a lot of pressure on women,

78

young women my age, and then of course Our

mothers to go back to work and we hear the

79

term latchkey kids that came out because

there was a backlash Against mothers

80

going to work because what was happening

with their children For the times, three

81

to five And honestly this research has

shown that's the time Most teenagers get

82

pregnant three to five in the afternoon.

83

Isn't that interesting?

84

Because their parents aren't there.

85

Stephanie: Change the phrase, nothing good

happens after midnight or between 3 and 5.

86

Betsy: 5.

87

Yes.

88

Stephanie: It's

89

Betsy: funny because when my husband

and I were in college and I share that

90

experience of when we had our biggest

sort of knockdown dragout without the

91

literal knockdown dragout Fight was or

conflict Was over this sort of thing of

92

going back to work or continuing on with

school and we made the non negotiable

93

at that point To that I would always

be home with my kids no matter what I

94

did in my life I would be home with my

kids when they went to school I would

95

be home with them when they came home

from school and then I would order my

96

day around that and that never changed.

97

We, we kept that and that's why

we call it a non negotiable.

98

We make non negotiables every, year or

so, but that's one of those steady ones

99

that has always existed until obviously

my kids moved out, out of the house.

100

But I would say this whole latchkey kid

thing and the pressure on women of that

101

day to be assertive To speak their mind,

not let anybody take advantage of them,

102

to not be submissive in the home or in the

workplace or anywhere and that the woman

103

could do it all and she could be super

mom and she could, bring home the bacon,

104

as the commercial said, do you remember?

105

Bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan.

106

I never let you forget you're a man.

107

That, that was a commercial on TV.

108

MIC3: Interesting.

109

MIC2: and it was a

cigarette commercial of all

110

Betsy: things.

111

MIC3: What?

112

Yes.

113

Betsy: Yes,

114

which now you're not even allowed to have.

115

Jen: yeah,

116

Betsy: That was the mentality of

that age and women were, began to

117

feel that if they weren't out in the

workplace that they really weren't

118

pulling their weight in the home.

119

And so of course we know that's

had a major influence on our

120

families and on our culture.

121

I think back to when Martha Stewart

started doing her Let's Make a Pie and

122

you were, we were looking at the cards

in the store that said, A picture of

123

a pie on the front of the cart and you

open it up and I don't know what it is

124

either, but, happy birthday and I think

125

appreciated Martha Stewart, whether

you do or not, for her bringing back

126

domesticity to the home and making women

feel like there's value in the home.

127

This is fun.

128

We can be creative at home.

129

We can do all these things for our family.

130

And love it.

131

Now, she's definitely pretty perfect

at what she does, but don't we know she

132

has a lot of people helping her to get

that perfect shot and there's probably

133

a lot of takes that aren't so perfect

before they get that perfect shot.

134

But I certainly enjoy

doing things at home.

135

I really do love it.

136

I know that if I have a busy day

and I'm outta the house a lot, if

137

I have a day, and this was always

true, if I have a full day at home

138

where I don't have to go anywhere.

139

That's like my favorite

140

Jen: have to

141

Betsy: love

142

it.

143

Yes.

144

Jen: I feel a restlessness when I see

that there is so many different things.

145

Just the other day we were joking

around, but I had to leave the

146

home five times and I'm like, and

they call me a stay at home mom.

147

actually

148

MIC3: Like I'm actually

leaving at five times today.

149

And I, but it just, I don't

like having to live that way.

150

And life happens and there are times

where you have to do that, but there

151

is something about those days when

you can be home and you can do that.

152

you can be together as a family.

153

You can do the catching up of the laundry

and the cleaning, and you're not stuck

154

to a schedule of having to get there, do

this, accomplish this, accomplish that.

155

And you can play a game of skip

o with the kids because you

156

don't have to be somewhere.

157

But I think that it, it's It

requires a lot of intentionality

158

in your scheduling and

159

MIC2: I think we have just filled our

minds with so many things to think

160

about and sometimes we just need to

step back and just be and get our

161

minds and our wits about us and relax.

162

And I always thought of my

husband in those early days.

163

He's at the office.

164

He has to think about this person's

issue and this person's problem outside

165

of the family constantly all day.

166

But me, I can pull back and I felt I

just thank the Lord that I have this

167

freedom to think about the Lord all day.

168

And I'm sure that my husband is

too, but you know what I'm saying?

169

It's I don't have this flood of

Everything else constantly Bombarding

170

my mind and it's in some ways.

171

It's a practice.

172

It's a choice There's a discipline

of having quiet time, which we've

173

talked about in an earlier episode

174

MIC3: Yeah, for sure.

175

It's interesting, Steph,

what do you think about that?

176

Do you feel like you, I'm

wondering about this generation.

177

Cause as she's saying freedom to

be able to think about Christ.

178

I definitely have those times in my

day where I've, Where I'm doing the

179

quiet time and I feel he permeates

my thoughts and it's a constant

180

conversation with him throughout the day.

181

But I, there are times where I am

like, there is so much coming at me.

182

What is going on?

183

What do you feel about that?

184

Stephanie: I think there's a

different reality to being a

185

homeschooling mom where, I've never

sent my children even to preschool.

186

So there hasn't been a really any

season of my life that I, Since I've

187

had all four of them, I've been there

and I think the reality of that kind

188

of compounds almost where you realize,

Oh, like I've never organized a closet

189

without also watching four kids.

190

I've never painted a room without

also watching four kids or getting up

191

in the middle of the night to do it.

192

Some of these things compound that.

193

It's a different, all of a sudden, I

think for us we're not just talking

194

about being a stay at home mom.

195

We're talking about being homeschooling

196

moms.

197

And I do feel that there is a surrender

to the Lord's agenda when we're with

198

our children and when we don't have a

work agenda, that's a reality that when

199

you believe that the most important

thing that you're doing is, discipling

200

your children and then also being.

201

a follower of Christ yourself.

202

When you really believe that there

is a peace that comes from it of

203

just opening your hands to, Lord,

this feels like an interruption.

204

This feels like we're, off track from

what I thought today was going to be.

205

But I believe that getting to this

child's heart is more important than

206

any load of laundry, any meal plan,

any reading lesson, any math lesson.

207

And so thank you for that.

208

And I find that there is a

piece that comes from that.

209

MIC3: Yes.

210

Stephanie: But there are times where, and

I, we've talked about that before, right?

211

That busyness often robs that,

those discipleship opportunities.

212

But I think that there's a distinction

between those and, but And we were talking

213

about some recent information, which

we'll talk about in another podcast, but

214

so few moms believe that they're doing

something of eternal value in their

215

home or that it's regularly meaningful.

216

And it is difficult to keep that

focus when you feel that your

217

days are consumed by the mundane.

218

It's difficult to keep a focus on, no,

this is making a lasting impact for

219

Christ and I am seen by the Lord and

he is delighting in my faithfulness.

220

I really do think we

need to contend for that.

221

What you were saying at Betsy

relates to that so much by the

222

culture telling us where our

worth and our identity comes from.

223

It's a generational thing.

224

It's also such an American thing that

our identity comes from our independence

225

and our worth comes from our work.

226

Yes.

227

And we.

228

We need to fight that with everything

in us because our greatest calling

229

is to be with the Lord, to sit at

the feet of Jesus, regardless of

230

what situations that takes us into

and to be faithful in those areas.

231

So I think we did, before we got into

the kind of the nitty gritty of the

232

scheduling and everything, we wanted

to make sure that our hearts are right

233

and why and making sure that we're

not swinging a pendulum of saying.

234

Order, or loosey goosey living, and we

235

MIC2: Yeah, It's

236

like that chart, that spectrum of order.

237

We don't want to be either extreme,

overly, extremely organized and

238

we can't handle any amount of

anything out of place to where we

239

just don't care about any of it.

240

Yeah.

241

And obviously those are both extremes.

242

Stephanie: Certainly.

243

And there, there has been research even

Stanford did a study about the amount

244

of clutter in a home is direct, directly

correlates to a woman's stress level.

245

Betsy: Oh, I totally

246

Jen: I agree.

247

Stephanie: And I think sometimes I

think it's helpful sometimes to even

248

realize, Oh, that's a valid thing.

249

There's a reason I felt like I had to

organize that before I could sit down

250

and really enjoy my time in the Word.

251

The, sometimes it can be

distracting or our minds are so

252

many places and to have peace.

253

And if that affects us, it might be

affecting our husbands and our children.

254

And I, so I think let's be intentional.

255

Let's be good stewards.

256

Let's be careful about what we accumulate

and careful that we maintain order

257

because it affects us in so many ways.

258

Betsy: and there's times of life where

you have to Just ease up on your order

259

Something that might be something

important to you if you lived by yourself

260

but you realize from that spectrum of

order you want to work more towards

261

balance harmony and unity with your

family and so You may have a person

262

in your family that doesn't think the

same way, and their temperament's not

263

the same, and you need to be balanced

so that everybody in the family feels

264

comfortable, feels, but not, if they're

way on the other side of the spectrum,

265

they need to move towards the center too.

266

That's an important thing.

267

I think of my pantry when I was young.

268

when my kids were in high school and they

would have their friends over and they'd

269

cook and bake and my pantry would not

be the way that I would love it to be

270

but then I just for A few years had to

just say, that's okay with me, whereas

271

it's against my natural inclination.

272

It's okay.

273

There's a little story that I used

to read at the end of Entrusted.

274

It's about, imagine having

a lipstick with a point, or,

275

not having sloppy oatmeal kisses or

somebody's handprint here or there.

276

You'll miss those little

things that your kids did.

277

I think you were telling me about

a handprint that was in the paint

278

of your house and you just cherish

279

it.

280

Stephanie: Yes.

281

On the front door, we had,

I painted the inside and.

282

It was still curing and one of the

kids you can just see a handprint

283

there and it's little and sweet

284

Betsy: and you know those

imperfections I feel like those are

285

the thumbprints on your home literally

286

But,

287

but some of those things are so special

we always say when they get that first

288

little ding on your car oh okay whatever

then you don't maybe value it so much you

289

don't worry about it so much you don't it

doesn't have so much you Control, you know

290

where you have to keep everything perfect.

291

Stephanie: I have found, sometimes,

you look for sources of wisdom on

292

some of these areas and If we don't

stay rooted in Christ, then all of a

293

sudden it becomes about the system.

294

It becomes about the order.

295

We lose the hearts of our children.

296

And we're, I just think that

there's such a danger in that.

297

And I personally, I saw there's

a very influential person that

298

she is in decluttering and

maintaining order in your home.

299

Initially, I had found her

years ago and her whole.

300

The whole idea was based on John

10, 10 I have come that, you might

301

have life and have it abundantly.

302

and she was drowning as a mother of

toddlers and the Lord said this is

303

not the life I have for you, I want

freedom and abundance of joy for you.

304

And so she, just the Lord gave her tips

on how do I bring order in my home?

305

And so I listened to her kind of for a

season and I felt Oh, this is so helpful.

306

And then I and then the Lord called me

to an information diet, which I think I

307

should talk about in another Podcast but

really just, okay, you've consumed enough.

308

Now you need to stop spending time finding

out solutions and just put them in action.

309

And so I stopped listening to her.

310

Then a couple of years later, Recently,

I went back and I thought, Oh, I have

311

a couple of questions about this.

312

I want to say, hear what she says about

this as my kids are getting older.

313

And I was shocked.

314

Her podcast is now explicit.

315

She's divorced.

316

And you could see how she went very

new agey with it, and Speaking to

317

moms about speaking affirmation to

yourselves and you could see how her

318

platform and her premise is still very

much about bringing order to the home,

319

but she has lost her focus on Christ and

it looks like her life is unraveling.

320

I don't see peace when I look at her.

321

And so before we say these practical

things, we just really want to make

322

sure that our hearts are right and

that we never forget that we're doing

323

this because our God is a God of order.

324

We're not doing this to

make ourselves elevated.

325

It's really about honoring the peace that

comes from order and that peace that the

326

Lord has established to be prevalent in

our homes, in the church, in our families.

327

Betsy: I think we want to make the

point that we're not seeking perfection.

328

We're not seeking perfection.

329

And there's so much freedom in that

when you can say, I've done the best

330

I could and so I don't have to shrink

away or shirk away from doing something,

331

trying things, trying new things.

332

This applies certainly to kids in sports.

333

If I can't be the best at something,

I can't go up for the team.

334

If I'm not the best singer, I

don't want to be in the choir.

335

All of these things we need to model

for our kids that we do the best we can.

336

As unto the Lord, we

are seeking excellence.

337

But we don't need to seek perfection.

338

Perfection comes through the Lord and

He's already made us perfect in His eyes.

339

So what we're working on

we're not working on that.

340

He's working on that in us until

the day that we're glorified.

341

But, just to be able to release

that whole notion of perfection.

342

I think the whole Supermom movement

started that and then people

343

felt like, no, I can do this.

344

I can have.

345

Kids, I can work a full time job and I

can do all these things and ultimately

346

something is going to give research shows

that the thing that usually gives first

347

is sensitivity and tenderness because

we're just so overwrought, overwhelmed and

348

Jen: It's true.

349

Stephanie: Yes.

350

Betsy: And then what does that mean?

351

That means it takes a toll on

marriage and relationships,

352

especially within our families.

353

Stephanie: That's

354

Jen: true.

355

very true.

356

I think there's such wisdom

in ordering our days.

357

through the lens of the Holy

Spirit and the Lord is in control

358

ultimately of all of these things.

359

Whenever we're going through our schedule

and planning things out, I'm constantly

360

asking the Lord, is this of you?

361

Is this what you would have for us?

362

Is this a wise use of our time?

363

We want to steward our times and we're

not striving for perfection to attain

364

the Joneses, but we are wanting to.

365

Allow our families and our children

to grow up well and experience the fun

366

things of baseball and to experience

those things, but it takes such wisdom

367

and discernment and ordering a day well,

because that's what Your calendar can

368

definitely be filled with things that

maybe the Lord isn't calling you to.

369

I'm reminded of a book that I read called

Growing in Gratitude by Mary Moeller.

370

It's Al Moeller's wife.

371

And she said, if we love people

well and have the power to help,

372

then we are going to be busy.

373

Jesus was busy, but always made

time for prayer as his priority.

374

Learning to pray I want to start with a

dialogue that really is critical I think

375

that this word does not us a less busy

life, but it offers us a less busy heart.

376

And so I think so often, if we can stop

and make sure that our day is ordered

377

well enough, as we spoke in the other

podcast about time alone with the Lord,

378

if we can order our day well enough

that we have the time in the Lord,

379

that we've submitted our heart and our

life to him and we've had that time.

380

Then we know that yes, we may be

busy, but our hearts are not busy.

381

And isn't that what matters more?

382

Scheduling our hearts so that our

heart are scheduling our time so

383

that our hearts don't feel so busy.

384

Our bodies might be busy leaving

the house five times in a

385

day,

386

but if my heart is right with the Lord

and I'm communing with him and I'm

387

abiding in him, then I can handle those

things with joy, with grace, with peace.

388

Betsy: The Lord give us,

joy, peace, understanding.

389

We feel the nearness of the

Lord to take us through the day.

390

And then we also trust that the

number of hours that He's chosen

391

to comprise the day is enough.

392

And that everything that we need

to do in that day and we, we do

393

our best, and if it's not done, my

husband though, I'm gonna admit,

394

says I have a terrible economy of

395

because

396

because I always think something will

take two hours and it takes five hours.

397

Now maybe that's because I'm Overdoing

it and being more thorough because

398

that's my, temperament in certain

things, but but those would be the

399

things I enjoy and I really delight in.

400

But by the end of the day, when

I lay my head on the pillow, I'm

401

like, I have done all I could.

402

Thank you for this day and

all I have to do now is sleep.

403

And that, I love it.

404

Because I used to, when I was younger,

think, now I should have done this.

405

And tomorrow, first

thing, I'm gonna do this.

406

And I would get not letting my mind rest.

407

But now.

408

I think I've done all I could.

409

Thank you for you allowing me all

that I was able to do, and it's

410

really not all about tasks, is

But I happen to be a task person.

411

And all that, I was able to see

and experience and who I was able

412

to be with, all those things.

413

And now I'm Just give me your rest.

414

And the Lord says he gives to

his beloved sleep in Psalm 1 27.

415

Stephanie: love that.

416

Betsy: sleep for a purpose.

417

Stephanie: As I was reading back

through the Bible again this year,

418

some verses really stood out to me.

419

2 and 3 says, And on the seventh day,

God finished his work that he had

420

done, and he rested on the seventh day

from all his work that he had done.

421

So God blessed the seventh day and

made it holy, because on it God rested

422

from all his work that he had done.

423

3 times in 2

424

It says that he had done and

that he finished his work.

425

And I thought, Lord, let me

know when the work is finished.

426

Because as a mother, I

feel it's never really

427

Everything is being done and undone and

428

repeated.

429

And I, probably my Achilles heel

in life is I'm very idealistic and

430

I can look at almost anything and

think how it could be improved.

431

And it is maybe a great thing about

me, but it's also a hard thing because

432

I don't always know when to stop.

433

And I thought, Lord, give me that wisdom

about when you would have me rest.

434

And so often it feels but there's

so much left to do on the list,

435

but it's my list and not his list.

436

And even sometimes they're good things,

really praying about what are the best

437

things and I think for each of us, our

husbands are a good check for that, right?

438

That we get very wrapped up in the,

we want to make the most of the

439

time and we want to be, honoring

the Lord and all these things.

440

And I remember once, it's just a silly

example that sticks with me, but I was

441

like, Travis, what if we take all the

kids mattresses and we put them here and

442

we do this and well, and I was thinking

how we could make this really fun.

443

I can't even remember

what occasion it was.

444

And my husband said and

he's like a master of rest.

445

It's going down, so it's a

good little balance for me.

446

But he said we could.

447

But then What would make

the other moment special?

448

I have this desire to make so many things

special, make every day count and But

449

he's what's going to make it stand

out when we do that on Christmas Eve?

450

And what's going to make

those moments set apart?

451

You can't make every

day so special, Steph.

452

And I was like, you're right.

453

Thank you.

454

Let's leave the mattresses where they

455

are.

456

Betsy: are.

457

There's a further implication of

what we were saying about rest.

458

In Hebrews 4, Jesus talks

about entering His rest.

459

And we know that's eternal rest.

460

And He says some people have had the

good news preached to them, just as they

461

also, but the word they heard did not.

462

Prophet them because it was not

united by faith in those who heard.

463

For we who have believed enter that

rest just as he has said, I swore in

464

my wrath, they shall not enter my rest.

465

So we understand that

466

being

467

rescued by Jesus in salvation gives us

the privilege of entering into that rest,

468

but not just in eternity, but also in our

hearts now where we can go through our

469

days and not feel completely overwhelmed.

470

And I think some of that comes with

growth and experience where you

471

realize, and I hope young women realize,

but I think it was pressured on my

472

generation, you have to do everything.

473

Those first years of marriage,

that second 20 years of life

474

that you have to be doing it all.

475

And where now we want to give women the

perspective, no there's maybe four bands

476

of life that you have, and you can seek

to do those other things after that.

477

second band, and I hope I'm making that

clear, if there's four bands, 20 years

478

each, that second band doesn't have to

be so overcrowded with everything that

479

the world wants to put on you to do.

480

And when your children are grown

after that second band, then you

481

still have so much more opportunity.

482

But, I feel that when you come

to that point, you realize, I

483

have entered the rest of the

Lord in this day, in this moment.

484

And so I don't fear.

485

I don't stress.

486

Okay, I didn't get that thing done.

487

The Lord knows that.

488

He can add hours to my day tomorrow,

which is not literally adding hours,

489

but you know what, sometimes when

you do something and I think it was

490

going to take me five hours and it

takes me one hour, I feel like Lord.

491

You added hours to my day and he

does do that But I think we really

492

do need to through salvation The lord

says I am providing you a glimpse

493

of heaven By understanding the rest

that you can have in your heart

494

here on earth and That is such a

precious thought to me from hebrews 4

495

Jen: I totally agree with that.

496

And I think that when we enter into our

week as we're ordering our days and we're

497

scheduling, if we enter into as rest

and have a peace that I often will pray

498

Lord, order my day, reorder my heart,

bless the work of my hands because if

499

this is what you are calling me to

physically and earthly, I look at my

500

schedule and I'm like not sure how this

is all going to done, but there are so

501

many times I agree with you, Betsy, where

I think this is not going to go well.

502

I don't know how I'm, how he's

called me to these things.

503

I fully believe this is

what he wants me to do.

504

I don't know how it's going to get done.

505

And lo and behold, in a way that only he

can, he It blesses the works of my hands

506

and makes it go so much smoother than I

could do it in striving in my own effort.

507

Betsy: And

508

it can even be something as

simple, this will be just a little

509

practical thing, as simple as having

to make a difficult phone call.

510

You know you've been putting off making

the phone call to the electric company to

511

say something or other, and to straighten

out a billing thing or whatever it is,

512

It's been ongoing for a few months and you

can just pray, Lord give me grace to speak

513

graciously to these people and then watch

how the Lord guards your heart and mind

514

to solve the issue very kindly and gently.

515

And I feel that we often just

push ahead to get something done

516

without acknowledging the Lord.

517

It says in Proverbs, acknowledge

him in all your ways.

518

and he will make your path straight,

but also it orders your day.

519

I'd like to add one more Verse here.

520

That's one of my husband's favorite from

Lamentations 2 23 and 24 Which says the

521

Lord's loving kindnesses indeed never

cease for his compassions never fail

522

They are new every morning Great is thy

faithfulness So every morning when you get

523

up, This is the legacy that my husband's

father left to him Is david every

524

morning when you get up and you put your

feet on the floor This is a new day to

525

glorify the lord and if you had a bad day

yesterday That's gone This is a new day.

526

This is the lord's loving kindnesses

are new every morning So bask in that Go

527

forward and have a great day So sometimes,

if you're feeling that way, that yesterday

528

was a bad day get out Lamentations 3, 22

and 23 and read that and take it to heart.

529

Jen: That's

530

a good word.

531

I love that.

532

Stephanie: I

533

think it points us to the

perfection of our Heavenly Father.

534

Amen.

535

Sometimes I can have this day where

you're like, ah, thank you, Lord.

536

Thank you so much.

537

Like you were saying, Jen, you

helped me accomplish so much.

538

Thank you.

539

And then the next day it feels

like I couldn't get anything done.

540

Like I can't have back

to back super mom days,

541

Jen: nope.

542

Stephanie: and it just realizing, but

Lord, you, every day you are fully

543

faithful and your character shines.

544

So much.

545

So I will rest in your faithfulness

to my children, to my family and often

546

for me I find that it reaches the end

of the day and there are things that I

547

didn't get crossed off and you realize

If I've rightly ordered the day, those

548

are the things that didn't matter

549

to

550

Jen: you

551

Stephanie: Those were on my

list, but those were the things.

552

And it happened as I was

packing for this trip.

553

I have to get this done.

554

I have to get this done.

555

I have to get this done.

556

And then realizing, okay, no, actually

we're about to load up the car.

557

You weren't going to get that done.

558

And, realizing, thank you God for

providing clarity those were the things

559

that didn't matter as much in realizing.

560

It's okay.

561

Jen: I had that this week.

562

I felt like I had a list in my head.

563

But I had this week so much that

there were things that I wanted to

564

get done that have been on my list

in the back of my head of things

565

that I wanted to do for a long time.

566

And I woke up one morning with thinking,

this is the day that I can get them done.

567

I, my schedule is clear.

568

And thing after thing kept coming

up and I was getting so overwhelmed

569

in my spirit and a heavy heart.

570

I was getting bitter and

angry because I was annoyed.

571

This was my day to accomplish and

now it's not and all these things.

572

And I really, I just cried out to

the Lord and was like, Lord, help me.

573

I don't know how I'm going

to get these things done.

574

This was the day I had.

575

And now this is all happening.

576

I need your help.

577

And

578

MIC3: I,

579

Jen: I was driving to another appointment

and Olivia was in the car with me and I

580

just said, I just need to pray a minute.

581

And out loud in front of her, I was like,

Lord, you have called me to these things.

582

But I don't know how you are going

to help me accomplish these other

583

things that clearly need to be done.

584

I need your help.

585

I was like, okay, thank you, Lord.

586

And we moved on.

587

That whole rest of the day went horribly.

588

not go as I would have hoped at all.

589

But, the next morning, we got up

and Cade, out of his own, Will

590

and desire came up and said,

mom, I'd like to earn some money.

591

Do you have any jobs I

could do around the house?

592

And I thought, huh?

593

Yeah, actually I do.

594

So I gave him a job and I paid him

for it and he did a fantastic job.

595

That little guy at 10 years old

did so much work in one day.

596

He was so desiring, he's

saving up for a Lego set.

597

And so he worked his little butt

off helping me out around the day.

598

And at the end of that day.

599

I had almost everything on my list.

600

And I said, Oh Lord, you are so good here.

601

You sent help from my own 10

year old son and he desired it.

602

Wasn't me forcing him to do it.

603

He worked as unto the Lord.

604

And I believe with all my heart

that the Lord blessed his decision.

605

of his hands because

he did a fantastic job.

606

And I just said to him, look, I was

stressing yesterday, wondering how

607

the Lord was going to send me help.

608

And he sent it through my own son.

609

You blessed me.

610

You blessed the whole family.

611

It was amazing.

612

He worked so hard.

613

And so there's times where we think

we will never get these things done.

614

And we're limiting the Lord.

615

We're using our earthly eyes.

616

Stephanie: Yes.

617

And the fact that He doesn't

always do it through us.

618

Jen: No, he doesn't.

619

Stephanie: It's because it's not about us.

620

Jen: No.

621

Stephanie: it's about his will and his

glory and him being the hero of the story.

622

And so it's embracing those moments

of humility and you're right.

623

I can't do it.

624

And yet I feel you pleased in my desire

to honor my day rightly before you.

625

I Psalm 90 verse 12, when it says,

so teach us to number our days

626

that we may gain a heart of wisdom.

627

And that makes so much sense with what

you were saying, Betsy, about the bands.

628

And sometimes my friends and I will

talk about Someday we'll sit on a

629

porch and sip lemonade together.

630

Someday!

631

Or, I think about the hobbies I want

to do and, Oh, it was another month

632

where I didn't get to paint watercolors.

633

I just want to do that so

badly, but there'll be a season.

634

There'll be a day where I

can delve into those things.

635

And this is a season of being

really present with my kids.

636

Don't misunderstand me.

637

I do think we need to take time to develop

friendships, to develop even hobbies and

638

model for our kids, what it looks like to

be, A full person but that you realize.

639

Yep.

640

I'm trying to do it all

641

in this

642

Betsy: priorities.

643

We make priorities.

644

We talk about that in Entrusted.

645

So what are your priorities for this

season of life, this band as we call it?

646

Jen: Yeah.

647

I think that's so helpful.

648

The band.

649

That is such a good perspective and

mindset of how to look at it because we

650

think, Oh, if I'm not doing this on a

weekly basis, if I'm not doing this on a

651

monthly basis, like I'm going to miss out.

652

But really.

653

Like God is outside of time.

654

We don't have just, this

little tiny portion.

655

We trick ourselves into thinking that

we do, but I think of grandma Moses

656

who was an artist and didn't take it up

until she was in her, what, eighties or

657

seventies,

658

She didn't do any of it.

659

And then when she was a

grandma, she started painting

660

and painting fantastically.

661

So we put so much pressure on ourselves

to get it done within this timeframe.

662

And the Lord is

663

It'll

664

be okay.

665

I've given you these wonderful desires,

and you'll have time for that, but not

666

now.

667

Betsy: but not now.

668

David's grandmother started crocheting

when she was like 70, and she ended

669

up crocheting her daughter's wedding

dress, but not with yarn, with thread.

670

was unbelievable.

671

Jen: you have a picture of that?

672

Betsy: I don't.

673

I wish I

674

Jen: I wish you did too.

675

Betsy: I know, but isn't that

676

Jen: something?

677

That is amazing.

678

Stephanie: That's

679

Betsy: There's so much time

in life and it goes fast.

680

I'm going to say it because I'm getting

there, but You just don't have to feel

681

that overwhelming pressure that you

to be doing everything now and we were

682

talking earlier We also don't have to

think that The Lord is more pleased

683

with us the more that we do Because

we are His workmanship for good work.

684

So as it says in Ephesians 2 10 We

are doing these things out of the

685

love for the Lord not because it wins

his favor with us We have already

686

We see that through salvation.

687

There's nothing we could do.

688

We didn't earn salvation by works.

689

It was entirely his work and just

out of love for him, we follow his

690

word and obey his word, serve others.

691

Jen: And isn't that just.

692

So wonderful that he's given us this

work, which Not that every work is a joy,

693

but there can be such joy in the work.

694

There's so much joy that could be had.

695

And he didn't have to create us that

way, but he allowed us to do these

696

works because even in the doing them,

it increases our love for him more.

697

And it gives us a way of presenting

something that is beautiful.

698

That.

699

grows us in the work.

700

We're growing in the work and

we're not earning our salvation.

701

We're not earning his

favor, but we're growing.

702

We're being sanctified in the work.

703

Betsy: He gave man work to

do even before the fall.

704

So work is something that

God designed for us to do.

705

And, it's harder now.

706

He said it's been works been cursed.

707

It's harder now But there can be such

a great feeling of accomplishment

708

and work and even for our kids

and kids shouldn't you know?

709

Miss out on that just a few verses

further in Lamentations 3 where

710

we were just talking a moment ago.

711

It says in verse 27.

712

It is good for a man to

bear the yoke in his youth.

713

And give kids chores that stretch them

physically, mentally, emotionally,

714

artistically, creatively, whatever

it is so that they're stretched.

715

And when they're done, like your son,

your 10 year old son, I'm sure felt that

716

was, that felt like a good accomplishment.

717

I worked hard

718

Jen: He

719

said to himself, Mom,

that was so rewarding.

720

Betsy: Yes.

721

Jen: He's yes, it is.

722

Keep doing it.

723

No, I'm

724

Betsy: And they'll learn to receive

the award of the reward of the Lord.

725

Well done, good and faithful servant.

726

I do this as unto the Lord.

727

That's the, but not always.

728

It's sometimes, all of us.

729

Receive something for a job well done.

730

But not always.

731

Not always.

732

We're looking to the Lord.

733

Stephanie: I learned recently, maybe I've

heard it before, but I heard it again in

734

a sermon that when the Lord before the

fall says, fill the earth and multiply

735

and subdue the earth, that subdue word

is where the word chaos comes from.

736

And so the pastor said, we are

to take the peace in the garden.

737

And spread it.

738

We are supposed to fill the earth with

this peace and I think that's so neat

739

to think about even the gospel, it

starts in our home, we're discipling

740

our children, we're creating peace

in our home and then we're spreading

741

that out and sharing it with others.

742

But it also relates to order

743

MIC2: god knew that the

world would need subduing.

744

Because he knew that the fall was coming.

745

Okay.

746

Satan brought the chaos.

747

Jen: Yeah.

748

Stephanie: what are some other

scriptures that come to mind when you

749

think of ordering our lives rightly

750

Betsy: Psalm 118.

751

24 that says, and we hear this

verse a lot, but when we just take

752

a moment to really let it sink in.

753

This is a day that the Lord has made.

754

Let us rejoice and be glad in

755

it.

756

Stephanie: That's great.

757

Yes.

758

Jen: Psalm 16.

759

9 that says, The heart of man plans his

way, but the Lord establishes his steps.

760

I sometimes think of it as the Lord

being like, Yes, you may plan that.

761

I'm going to be the one that establishes

and these things work and makes it go

762

the way that I really want it to go.

763

And I'm so thankful for that.

764

I don't really want to

be planning my own way.

765

Psalm 16, three says, commit

your work to the Lord and your

766

plans will be established.

767

if I'm committing it to the

Lord, Then my heart is asking

768

for his will to be done in it.

769

And he establishes that.

770

That doesn't mean that the

Lord does what we want.

771

It means when we commit it to

him, we're submitting it to

772

Betsy: him Yes,

773

Jen: this Lord is yours.

774

You do the growing, unless the Lord

builds a house, we labor in vain who build

775

it.

776

Betsy: We relinquish control of

777

Jen: Yes.

778

In

779

Stephanie: In Proverbs 6, 6 through 8,

it says, Go to the aunt, O sluggard,

780

consider her ways and be wise.

781

Without having any chief, officer,

or ruler, she prepares her bread in

782

summer and gathers her food in harvest.

783

And that when we are mature in

the Lord, we do it unto him.

784

And we don't need a manager.

785

The external motivator

doesn't need to be there.

786

It's an internal motivation

that we're serving the Lord.

787

This ordering of our days or the hard

work, it becomes easier and more natural.

788

And I think we're more faithful

as we walk in the spirit.

789

Betsy: I think that's the overall point

that we're making here in this first part,

790

is that we wanna be internally ordered.

791

And if we want to have any external order,

we have to first be internally ordered in

792

communion with the Lord and gratitude for

what He's done, thankfulness, and knowing

793

that if I don't get this done, it's okay.

794

Lord, you are with me

and you know these things

795

and

796

it's just a really freeing feeling.

797

Jen: It's freeing and it produces joy.

798

produces joy because we know we can't,

ultimately we can't mess this up.

799

The Lord is sovereign and he's kindly

allowing us to take part in these

800

things, but he is the master artist,

and he is allowing all of our little

801

childish drawings to come into something

beautiful that he is planning and doing.

802

And he does the work.

803

He does these things, but we

get the joy of participating.

804

One of my favorite verses for when Things

don't go my way or when the order turns to

805

chaos because of the children or my home,

because as Betsy had mentioned, if I lived

806

alone, everything would be very orderly,

tidy with no no piles of paperwork.

807

No But my favorite verses, Proverbs 14,

four says where there are no oxen, the

808

manger is clean, but abundant strength

comes from the crops of the oxen.

809

And if I had no children, my house would

be clean, but strength comes from that.

810

And productivity requires investment when

you, if you were a farmer and you wanted

811

to be productive, you needed to invest

into the oxen to have that, to bring

812

the strength and to bring that in there.

813

And so with that, that requires

the feeding and the cleanup of the

814

oxen and an investment in that.

815

And so we need to invest in that.

816

In the labor.

817

We need to invest in those

resources and doing that.

818

But guess what?

819

Theen are part of the mess.

820

They can clean the mess up.

821

These children of ours, we, it doesn't

rely on just us to clean this up.

822

I often say that I am not the

only one that made this mess.

823

Let's work together, and doing

the work of the household.

824

Betsy: And I think we can add one more

thought from Matthew 6 27 we're familiar

825

with this one too starting with 26

actually look at the birds of the air They

826

do not sow nor reap nor gather into barns

and yet your heavenly father feeds them

827

That may be where somebody is right now.

828

They feel the pressure to have

to work They feel they do have to

829

do so many things in this world

while their children are at home.

830

But know that the Lord is still watching

over you, and He is feeding you.

831

And are you not worth much more than they?

832

And who of you by being worried

can add a single hour to his life?

833

And why are you worried about clothing?

834

Observe the lilies of the

field and how they grow.

835

Do they not, they do not

toil, nor do they spin.

836

Yet I say to you that not even

Solomon in all his glory Clothed

837

himself, like one of these.

838

But if God so clothes the grass of

the field, which is alive today and

839

tomorrow is thrown into the furnace,

will he not much more clothe you?

840

You of little faith do not worry, then

saying, What will we eat, or what will we

841

drink, or what will we wear for clothing?

842

For the Gentiles eagerly

seek all these things.

843

For your Heavenly Father knows

that you need all these things,

844

but seek first His kingdom.

845

And his righteousness and all

these things will be added to you.

846

So don't worry about tomorrow.

847

For tomorrow will take care of itself.

848

Each day has enough trouble of its own.

849

I know

850

Stephanie: I was sharing the other

day those are some of my memorial

851

verses that every time I get anxious

about my body, about my children's

852

bodies, about our provision, the

Lord brings you back to that.

853

And you're like done.

854

Got it.

855

It's such a reset for my mind.

856

I think

857

Betsy: Awesome thought that

we use scripture when we

858

feel ourselves getting out of

859

Jen: Yes.

860

we

861

Betsy: we feel ourselves getting

that anxious mindset and stuff you

862

just shared that those were yours.

863

I know at certain points of my life

when I felt like that anxiety coming

864

over me, I will say scripture and I

know the one that I, Say the most and

865

I won't be able to say it right now

But 7 be anxious for nothing But in all

866

things by prayer with supplication and

thanksgiving Let your requests be made

867

known to God and the peace of God which

surpasses all understanding Shall guard

868

your hearts in minds in Christ Jesus.

869

Jen: love

870

Betsy: I

871

Love that so much because it says

your hearts Your thoughts and

872

your emotions, I will bring under

my perfect and sovereign peace.

873

And so that the peace of God,

which surpasses all comprehension.

874

She'll guard your hearts and minds.

875

That is, that's my verse for that moment.

876

Do you have

877

Jen: I do.

878

It's take every thought captive

and make it obedient unto Christ.

879

And so we are not to allow our thoughts

and our minds to constantly be going.

880

And as we're thinking of our schedule,

thinking of our day, thinking of what

881

they're going to eat, what they're

going to wear, all the different

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things, we need to take our thoughts

captive because they're coming at us.

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They're coming

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Betsy: at

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Jen: but we take that captive.

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And we make them obedient unto Christ.

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They're not going to naturally

be obedient to Christ.

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And so whenever I'm feeling that nope,

I'm going to take that thought captive,

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even when it pertains to forgiveness,

when it pertains to bitterness, to

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any of those emotions, those feelings

that come in, the thoughts that

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come in that are sinful thoughts,

no, I'm going to take that captive.

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Betsy: Love that.

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What is the reference for that

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verse?

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Jen: Second

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Corinthians five.

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We destroy arguments and every lofty

opinion raised against the knowledge

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of God and take every thought captive

to obey Christ, being ready to

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punish every disobedience when your

obedience is complete, is what it says.

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Stephanie: says.

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Betsy: Great.

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I love how the Lord his word in different

ways and to each of us that we would

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not having ever discussed this before

have our own verse anxious moments.

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Stephanie: We know you're busy,

Mama, so we are truly grateful you

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joined us for this episode of Again.

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If you're looking for more information

about building your home on the

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foundation of Jesus Christ, head to www.

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EntrustedMinistries.

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com to learn more about our study for

moms, Entrusted with a Child's Heart.

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This scripture saturated study

has blessed families around the

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world, and we want it for you, too.

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Before you go, I want to pray

this benediction over you

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from 2 Thessalonians 1, 11 12.

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We're rooting for you.

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To this end, we always pray for you,

that our God may make you worthy of His

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calling, and may fulfill every resolve

for good and every work of faith by

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His power, so that the name of our Lord

Jesus may be glorified in you, and you in

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Him, according to the grace of our God.

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And the Lord Jesus Christ.

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Amen.

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Until we meet again.