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In this episode of "A Changed Mind", our host David Bayer, dives into the real process behind personal change and manifestation. Instead of focusing solely on desired outcomes, David explores why resistance and challenges often surface right before transformation.
David unpacks the neuroscience and spiritual principles at play, sharing how your internal mindset must stabilize before external reality shifts. Through personal stories and practical insights, David reveals how these “tests” are actually opportunities for growth, not obstacles.
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SPECIAL MIND HACK/WHOLE HUMAN FRAMEWORK PROGRAM BUNDLE
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What We Explored This Episode
00:07:04 Resistance as a Natural Part of Change
00:13:14 Co-Creation, Higher Perspective, and Outcomes
Memorable Quotes
“Before reality changes externally, something has to stabilize internally. That stabilization usually happens through challenge, not comfort.”
“Your brain is a goal-achieving machine. The input is what you believe; the output into your reality is going to match it.”
“It’s not that the system is faulty or that you don’t create your own reality. The laws function, but they function in loving ways, and there’s a bird’s eye view that your higher power has. You are co-creating your reality with all of intelligence everywhere.”
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Transcripts
Normally, when we talk about change or manifestation, we focus on the outcome. The vision, the desire, the thing that we're trying to move forward. But what most people don't stop to question is why the path there is rarely smooth. Why, instead of immediate progress, resistance often shows up first. And it's almost as if the universe has its own way of responding to our intentions. Not by blocking them, but by introducing a series of moments that test how aligned we really are. And these moments aren't random. They're not punishments. They're not signs that something is going wrong. They're checkpoints. They are opportunities to see whether the desire that we're holding is surface level or something we're actually ready to live from. Because the truth is, before reality changes externally, something has to stabilize internally. And that stabilization usually happens through challenge, not comfort. And so, in this episode, I want to talk about why difficulty often appears right before a shift, why the universe seems to test you when you're close, and how understanding these tests can completely change the way you move through resistance and what happens on the other side of it. Let's get into it.
Welcome to A Changed Mind, a journey into the topics that matter to you most. From the neuroscience and spirituality of mindset and personal growth, to groundbreaking strategies for health, wealth, and relationships, to open and honest conversations about pressing global issues such as the environment, censorship, corporate capture, and democracy. Each and every episode reminds us of the certainty of the good of the future and provides the teachings, tools, and timeless wisdom inspiring you to create real, lasting change in your life and in the world. If you've been desiring a sanctuary for your spirit, a place to go to tune out the distraction, negativity, and doom and gloom so that you can tap into the deep power, the vibrancy, and the potential you have inside. You're in the right place. Welcome to a Changed mind.
All right, guys. I don't know about you, but from my own personal experience, 100% feels like the moment that I make a new decision or that I want to change something in my life, it feels like the universe starts testing me, or even more so that things actually start falling apart, you know? I remember sharing a conversation with a friend of mine. I told him something like, hey, I want to learn how to experience more peace in my life. And a couple weeks later, we had another conversation. And I said, dude, the moment I made the decision, all of a sudden, all kinds of situations and circumstances came up that were creating chaos. And I realized in hindsight that learning how to manage the cha differently was Actually the way that I would learn how to be more peaceful. And he laughed and he said, man, that's so true. It makes me afraid to ask God for anything. He said, I want the outcomes, but I don't want to have to go through the growth process. And so I don't know if you can relate to that or not, but that's very much in alignment with me and my experience. When we ask for change, we feel like the universe tests us. But there are a couple of things that are going on that I think are going to be really helpful for you in understanding that it's not really a quote unquote test. You know, the universe is not being adversarial, but it's actually a natural process of change. So I want to explain how this structure works. So the first thing is that the moment you decide something, your perception starts to change, right? And this is a natural function of the human being operating system. There's a part of the brain that's called the reticular activating system. And it's that part of your brain that when you buy a new car, starts to notice the car everywhere on the road, or you buy a new outfit, now everybody's wearing the same shirt. And so neuroscience tells us that 88% of what happens in your day to day reality gets completely filtered to the subconscious mind. You're not aware of it, you're only aware of about 12%. What you're aware of is what you determine to be important to you. And so what happens now is when you decide for change in your life, you have a heightened sensitivity to your reality and you're looking for that change. You know, for example, you want to make more money, you want to get out of financial insecurity, and now you're hyper vigilant, noticing situations and circumstances that don't actually align with it, right? So oftentimes it's not that you all of a sudden get more unexpected bills showing up in the mail, or that a business deal you expected to happen falls through because you've decided you want financial prosperity and abundance. It's that you have a greater level of awareness around it. And so it seems like life is testing you more. Your brain is a goal achieving machine. That's a beautiful thing. The input is what you believe, the output into your reality is gonna match it. But what you've done now when you decide for change is you've directed your consciousness and a part of your awareness towards the outcome that you want. And so it's as if what you don't want starts to enlarge itself. It's not actually enlarging, but it just seems that way. And that is a natural byproduct of how your system of consciousness functions. So that's the first thing. The second thing is to know that this is a natural part of the process. Because it's beginning to test your nervous system. So it's not a test like you have to pass it in order to get the universe to give you what you want. But it's beginning to put pressure on your nervous system for change. If you create your reality, what you do, and you create your reality based on your thoughts and your emotions that you habitually have, that you've practiced over time. A vibration that you've created inside of you that reality is reflecting back to you, then reality is a mirror. And so in order to create a different reality, you have to change your nervous system. You know, the good news is that the nervous system is neuroplastic. That means you can change the way that you think. You can uninstall these limiting beliefs and reinstall new belief systems. You can change the habit of communication that is running through your nervous system. Which is emitting the vibration that's catalyzing your reality. This is a really good thing. But in order to change your nervous system or to strengthen it in the direction of what you want, you have to think about it as resistance training. And so in some ways, life will increase the resistance. At some level, the reflection for a short period of time will begin to increase in intensity. So there will be an increase in circumstances and situations that are going to align with your old belief system. Because as you're willing to be present to them in this new awareness, that's actually the mechanism for you to strengthen your holding onto the new belief. So it's almost like saying to life, hey, life is saying, I'm willing to give you what you want. But you need to align your nervous system with that outcome. You have to match it and become coherent to it. And the best way for me, the universe, to help you do that Is to temporarily surface into your experience more situations and circumstances that are very much like the old or that are very much in alignment with your old limiting belief. But it's the same thing as going to the gym. You decide that you want to become stronger. You don't just become stronger because you go into the gym. You have to lift more resistance. You have to lift the weights. And in the same way, life is architecting around you in an environment where there's resistance training so that you can develop more muscle towards what you want. Now, I know that's in exact opposition to what I just made in the first point. Said, hey, the intensity isn't increasing. But notice that both these things are going on. So it'll feel like there are way more things happening in opposition to what you just decided that you want. Part of that is because you're noticing it more, and part of that is because there is a natural increase that's part of the resistance training. But that's a good thing. That is the way the system works. When you know that that's the way the system works, you no longer start to have limiting beliefs about what's going on. Like, you know, wow, the universe is challenging me and I have to win some battle with it, or, wow, this is a sign from the universe that I'm not meant to have what I want. The third thing is that there's a natural checks and balances built into the system of reality. So in some ways, you can think of it as a living software system with a code. And the software code has, let's call it a change request verification. It's almost like it's saying, hey, we heard that you requested this new thing. More money, better health, better relationships, grow your business. But we want to verify that it's true, and we're going to verify that it's true by giving you more of what you've been getting. Meaning the old reality. Could you please verify that the new reality is what you want before we fulfill on that change request? And this is a good thing because, you know, if we had instant manifestation, we'd instantly manifest our problems. And so we do want to have a verification process in the system, and we send that verification back by holding the new belief even when our current reality has not reflected the new belief that we've established yet. So we have to hold the belief that money is easy to make while we're moving through an old identity that might have still within it examples of financial insecurity. We have to hold the new belief that there's nothing wrong with us and that our body is healthy. As we continue over the short term to experience the old reality of a body that is in some form of disorder and sometimes even an increase in our symptoms, because that's the way the system works. That's the universe saying, hey, you sure about this? And the mistake that most people make is since they don't understand that this is the system of checks and balances, they unconsciously fall back into the old belief. Oh see, I knew it. Money's hard to make. Oh see, I knew it. There's something wrong with me. And so the reality never changes because we don't hold the new decision or the vibration long enough through the change request. Okay, the last thing that I want to speak into related to this conversation is why sometimes we get what we want and sometimes we don't get what we want. Why sometimes change happens and sometimes the change doesn't. Even when we're aligned, even when we are sending back the change request. Right. Even when we hold the new decision in a new vibration. And I want to speak about this at an even higher level. So let's zoom out for a second. Okay. And we're going to use the word God. You could use God, universe, nature, Jesus, Allah, whatever describes your higher power. But what I want to propose to you is that you and God had an agreement before you came around. Yet what you were going to create here and who you came to be, the things that you were going to learn. And this was your decision. But it's a co creation with your higher self. You go through many, many, many lives. And in each life you do a life review and you look back and you experience your life. And from that experience, in some traditions it's called kamaloka. And from that experience you are motivated, inspired to come back into life and to grow and expand and to learn something new based on what you experienced in past lives. And so you choose what you want to learn. And as you come in and incarnate, God is always working to support you in that intention. And so sometimes you get things that you want and it works out great and it's part of your growth process. Sometimes you get things that you want and it actually doesn't work out very well. It's like, be careful what you wish for. But if you look at those instances, you learn from the experience and that's how you grow. I remember when I was in my late 20s and like what I wanted to meet was a beautiful woman and have a girlfriend. And so life gave me a beautiful woman who ended up cheating on me multiple times. So I got what I wanted, but it didn't work out that well. But it was part of my growth. It helped me actually fine tune what I wanted, which was not just a beautiful woman, but an intelligent woman and a spiritually connected woman and someone who shares my vision and my values. That was what needed to be cultivated inside of me in order for me to actually meet my now wife who is all of those things. So sometimes we get what we want, but it doesn't work out the way that we expected it to. But you learn from it and it's part of the process of you becoming who you came here to be. And sometimes you don't get what you want and you actually learn from that. And that's how you grow. You think about a time in your life where you really wanted something and you didn't get it. And you look back on that fact now and you're like, well, thank God I didn't get it. Because if I had gotten it then it would have been problematic. And if I had gotten that, then I wouldn't have these other things that I really, really cherish. You know, I wanted to build a multi hundred million dollar company out of my first E commerce company, but I would have been on a completely different path. And I'm very happy with where I'm at right now. So there are plenty of things, you know, I wanted to have a lot more money when I was younger, not two homes in foreclosure in my mid-30s and feeling purposeless. But if I'd had millions of dollars before I found recovery, man, that would have certainly been dangerous. And so this is important because it's not that the system is faulty and that you don't create your own reality. The laws do function, but they function in loving ways. And there's a bird's eye view that your higher power has and you are co creating your reality with all of intelligence everywhere. And it is in according to an agreement that you and your higher power came to before you came. And so that's going to determine the courses, the lessons, the learnings. And you're, you know, it's like the, if you've ever seen that Olympic game on ice, man, the name escapes me right now. It'll come to me after the episode. But where they're, they're shoveling the little ice patches as they're trying to move the hockey puck forward. That's your higher power sometimes giving you what you want, sometimes giving you what you need, sometimes not giving you what you want, but always what you need in order for the puck to land exactly where it needs to land. But most people make the mistake of evaluating it, meaning their lives in a very linear way. And they say, well, I guess I don't create my own reality, or in some areas I do, but in other areas I don't. It must be some like karmic thing or reality's testing me and there's some Permission that I need in order to create what I want. No. The truth is that the system is always functioning consistently a hundred percent of the time. It is always working for your greatest growth, your greatest prosperity and your greatest evolution. And the universe is not testing you or challenging you like an adversary. It's always working with you to help strengthen you, to help you become more coherent, to help you align with the things that you want and the purpose for which you came. And when you can understand that now you have a proper, or as Buddha would say, intelligent perspective on reality. And even though things may not always go the way that you initially want, you can relax. Because you know that these system changes, these reality changes, and the giving or getting of what you desire or not are all, all meant for your greatest outcomes. And you can drop all the resistance that's created from the belief that there's something wrong with you or something wrong with the universe or something that you need to do in order to win God's favor or God's love. That's not how it works. The system is always working perfectly. It is our misperception of it working perfectly that is the challenge. And what I believe is that true personal growth and becoming a whole human is the ability to see that in our day to day experiences. This is how the laws are functioning. They are loving laws. Like a loving father who sometimes gives his son or daughter the things they want and sometimes doesn't give them the things they want because he, she, it knows best. And living that way is the practice. And so I'm grateful that you're here in the practice with me today because this is not a do it yourself project. It's a do it with others. If you want to continue the practice, I've got a ton of resources for you. You can check out a link in the show notes, whether it's my book on Amazon or my upcoming live event or one of my digital courses. Or you can just jump on over to davidbear.com Sign up for our newsletter. You'll get a four part video series that'll take you even deeper into this conversation and daily practice. But I appreciate you. I love you so much and I will see you in the next episode. Hey, it's David. One more thing.
If you want to go even deeper on everything we've talked about on today's episode, don't forget to jump over to www.DavidBear.com. you can find the link in the show notes and subscribe to our newsletter a couple of times a week. I'm going to be sending you the latest episodes that we've released, along with additional free trainings. You'll get immediate access to my free MindHelp hack ebook and go even deeper into all the tools, the technologies, and the frameworks that have helped tens of thousands of people establish a changed mind. Don't forget to jump on over to the site and I will see you in the next episode.
