2 - The Seaman And The Colonel

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[Music]

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human

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extinction level yes

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disciplinary action

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seaman francis delrony thought it was

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he was only in the military

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because some judge thought it

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would be funny to up his life

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francis wished he had chosen prison over

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the navy

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he would probably be in some toughest

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gang right now running the place

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those prison guards would be jumping

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when he gave the word instead of being

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pushed around by these jack-booted

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government issue

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he almost made it out too if it wasn't

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for the two no-necks on either side of

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him

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jumping in the lake was a damn good idea

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throw them off the scent go prison break

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on their asses navy beats army and

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sayonara

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who knew these steroid-rabbit army

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automatons could even swim and that was

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another thing

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how come they got to change their

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clothes while he had to stand here

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dripping like a drowned rat all shivered

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and

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he had half a mind to call his

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congressman let him know how the

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army treated a citizen who is my

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congressman anyway

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it didn't matter he would look

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it up and then these army

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would brew the day damn straight

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understand these charges against you

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delrony looked up at colonel stephen

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bennett the tail end of the question

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piercing his internal rant and bringing

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him back to the reality of his situation

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what

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he said

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senior chief charles huxley glared at

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delrony semen dalroni you will address

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the colonel by his rank and you will

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call him sir you read me

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now say yes sir i understand the charges

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against me

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seaman delrony shrunk under the

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penetrating gaze of his senior chief

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he hung his head and whimpered

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yes sir colonel sir

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i understand the charges against me

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senior chief huxley seethed as he kept

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his glare on delrony for several seconds

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it's alright senior chief we're not

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going to yell at seaman delrony anymore

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today we're going to help him

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all that fresh colorado air and

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beautiful scenery outside our mountain

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is just too much of a distraction

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we need to put him someplace where he is

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away from all that temptation

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i think i have just the place for you

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i am ready to pronounce judgment

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colonel bennett said

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senior chief huxley shouted at delrony

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simon delrony a tan john

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delrony's efforts amounted to nothing

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more than raising the slope in his

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shoulders

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this did not rise to the level of

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satisfaction for the senior chief

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sergeant the big dow known it help the

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young seaman come to proper attention

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please

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senior chief huxley barked

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the two military policemen on either

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side jerk to tell rooney's arms straight

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down to his sides and pulled his

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shoulders back

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colonel bennett rested his hands on the

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podium and stared at seaman delrony

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seaman delrony i reduce you in rank by

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one grade i further reduce you in base

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pay by half for 60 days and restrict you

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to the base for the same

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you will no longer be a daily thorn in

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your senior chief's side but are to

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report for duty to special projects

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disposal unit for a period not to exceed

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45 days

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they call it the skunk farm seaman

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apprentice del roni do you want to know

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why

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it's because when dr kraner finishes up

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running his experiments the test

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subjects have to be disposed of

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that's your job for the next 45 days

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it's buried deep down in the ground

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it will free you from any and all

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distraction and give you plenty of time

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to ponder the choices before you

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the judge sought to give you a second

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chance we are going to see to it that

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you have every opportunity to make the

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most of it

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maybe if you feel the bite that your

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irresponsibility has given you it will

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make you want to change your ways and be

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something else than what you are now

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seaman apprentice delrony you are

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dismissed

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colonel bennett said

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he folded up the file in front of him

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and exited the room as the burly

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sergeants led frances delrony away

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human testing

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dr krenner paced around the lab

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he had a call to make but he was loathed

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to do it

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he did not like talking to the military

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brass

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in the field of science they were a

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broadsword where a scalpel was required

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they were to his way of thinking

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unnecessary evil

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the military was only concerned about a

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particular set of results and then only

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so far as those results furthered their

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mission parameters

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dr krenner knew there was something

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always to be learned from every

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scientific endeavor the successes and

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the failures

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he did not even think in terms of

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failures so long as new information was

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gained

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the outcome of his latest experiment

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an experiment that resulted in the

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termination of 20 test subjects was of

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no real concern to him

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he knew there was information to be

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gained and facts to be gleaned

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it was of no great concern to him

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but he knew it would be of tremendous

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concern to the colonel

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that military man would not see a

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phoenix from the ashes he would see only

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the ashes

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colonel bennett would not see the

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potential in what he would most

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certainly call a failed experiment

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he would only see budget overruns and

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lost time

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dr krenner approached the wall of glass

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separating him from the 20 dead

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chimpanzees in the habitat

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he clasped his hands behind his back and

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fumed at his circumstance which had

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nothing to do with the carnage before

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him

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he knew what colonel bennett would say

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it is what he always said when given the

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news that was anything but a total and

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categorical success

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colonel bennett would remind him that

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the program was a hair's breath away

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from being scrapped that if there was

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not real results and soon the lab would

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be shut down and the file closed on the

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project

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dr krenner tried to calm his nerves and

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rehearse in his mind what he was going

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to say to the colonel when he came down

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to the lab and saw what was on the other

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side of the glass

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dr krenor was going to have to try and

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make colonel bennett understand

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he was going to have to convince him to

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authorize human trials

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despite what he saw in the habitat

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beyond

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colonel bennett marched down the

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brightly lit halls towards the lab

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the doctor had requested to see him when

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he had asked dr krenor what it was about

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he only received the cursory response

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that it would be better if he just came

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down

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while that answer could mean anything

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stephen bennett was not a man to assume

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it was good news

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dr krenner continued to stare into the

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habitat his arms again clasped behind

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his back

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in the wall of glass he saw the

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reflection of the monitor above the

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security door

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and knew that the colonel had arrived

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a second later he heard the swish of the

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door slide open

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dr krenner did not turn immediately

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instead he took a deep breath and put on

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his best smile

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coming about to face his overseer only

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when he was sure it would be convincing

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he rushed up to the colonel hand

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outstretched as if welcoming an old

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friend

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colonel thank you for coming i have much

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to report but i want you to know colonel

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bennett took one look at the glass and

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brushed past the doctor ignoring his

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congenial efforts

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he stood a gate at what he saw

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what the hell is this doctor

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are all those test subjects dead

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colonel bennett said

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dr krenor winced as he lowered his hand

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and stared at the back of colonel

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bennett's head

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gathering his resolve he attempted to

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put a good light on the situation

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today's trials resulted in an ulterior

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set of parameters to be sure but for the

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second time his words were cut short as

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colonel bennett spun on him

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ulterior set of all i see are dead apes

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those aren't results of any kind those

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are 20 failures in there 20 line items

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on a budget report that i am going to

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have to file

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assets in the red with nothing to show

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for it doctor

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colonel bennett said

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dr krenner grit his teeth

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what he had predicted had come to pass

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he thought it his curse to labor under

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those who had not the intellectual

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dexterity to see how the scientific

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method must necessarily progress

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he let out his breath quietly through

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his nose and unclenched his teeth

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there is much we can learn still

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autopsies will be conducted of course

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from this set of ashes the phoenix will

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yet rise colonel

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dr krenor said

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he had used that phrase several times

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before

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in appeal to colonel bennett's martial

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sensibilities

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in an attempt to assuage him save your

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platitudes doctor this program is in

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real danger i have already been on the

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phone with the pentagon and they are

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this close to shutting it all down

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if we don't see some real results and

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damn quick it's over

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colonel bennett said dr krenner was

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caught flat-footed he blinked at the

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colonel

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the pentagon why are they calling they

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must know colonel bennett waved dr

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krenor off even as he turned back toward

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the glass i called them it's all fine

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and good to be playing mad scientists

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down here doctor but i have some very

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powerful and impatient people to answer

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to and they have to answer to the

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stooges in washington about line items

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that aren't what they are if you know

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what i mean

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colonel bennett said dr crainer swayed

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on his feet the need for results while

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putting the program in danger could also

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make those desiring results amenable to

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an accelerated set of clinical trials

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dr krenor took a breath and then took

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the plunge

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you know colonel chromosomally the

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primate and the human are very similar

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perhaps it is in the differences that

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our problem lies

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if we could move into human trials we

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might again colonel bennett turned on

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him his face sparing even more shock

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than when first seeing the dead chimps

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you want to what

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you want to begin human trials when what

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we've got down here won't work on

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monkeys

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no doctor we need something we can show

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the brass animal test subjects that do

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what we want them to do

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can you imagine the storm that

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would rain down on us if we tested this

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failure on humans

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you're supposed to be a smart guy doctor

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surely you can see that

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colonel bennett said storming toward the

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door

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i've got another call to make doctor but

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i can tell you will not be a pleasant

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one you have one week give us something

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we can use or get your resume together

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he said as he punched in his access code

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oh and i've assigned you a new body to

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the skunk farm he's almost as big a

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washout as this program appears to be

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by what i see in that cage he's got his

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work cut out for him colonel bennett

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said as he walked out

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dr krenner found it hard to breathe as

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if the door had slid shut on his

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windpipe

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he reached out and grabbed the corner of

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the table for support

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to take a man's life work was to take

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his life

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he slumped onto a stool and closed his

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eyes trying to control his breathing

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if the troglodytes in washington

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canceled the project it would almost

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certainly mark the end of what he was

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trying to achieve

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at the very least it would be a setback

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of perhaps years as he wasted time

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trying to secure funding and facilities

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that would allow him to continue

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and what would he tell his new

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benefactors to persuade them to give him

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what he needed

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governments already worked on the shady

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side of the street and were more

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inclined to take and hence allow

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liberties with ethical boundaries

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the fact that the private sector was

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just as concerned with results as

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governments were if not more was no

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consolation

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no his best chance his creations best

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chance was with those he was in bed with

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now

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his breathing returned to normal and he

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stood

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governments knew how to work in the

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shadows to defer and cover up

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and so did he

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if colonel bennett demanded bricks but

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would not provide the straw then he

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would gather his own straw

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and indeed he already had

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dr krenor pushed away from the table

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those failed test subjects would have to

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be disposed of down in the skunk form as

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he knew others called it

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he smiled let them think in a detestable

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place a place they would avoid

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he knew it to be something else entirely

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it was where his true work

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his life's work

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would live

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before you go i just wanted to tell you

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it's podcasters third annual reviews for

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good

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for every review left on podchaser they

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will donate 25 cents to world central

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kitchen

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this year the effort is focused on the

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people of ukraine

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so leave a review of this podcast on

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podchaser

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they will double the donation if i

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replied to the review

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which i will

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thanks for listening

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