92: Ask Mari + Trey Anything: Men & Fear of Rejection, Building Catholic Friendship, Fertility Updates, & More!

Speaker: 00:00:06

Hey, I am your host, Mari Wagner,

and you're listening to The Ever Be

2

: 00:00:11

Podcast where Faith Meets Lifestyle.

3

: 00:00:14

I'm so excited you're here.

4

: 00:00:16

Whether you're a new listener

or a longtime follower, I know

5

: 00:00:19

there's something here for you.

6

: 00:00:20

Pull up a chair and listen in for

insightful, real life conversations and

7

: 00:00:24

actionable steps on how to claim the.

8

: 00:00:26

Full life God created you for.

9

: 00:00:28

If you're a woman desiring to live

a Christ-centered life in today's

10

: 00:00:32

modern world, then this is for you.

11

: 00:00:36

Welcome to ever be.

12

: 00:00:42

All right.

13

: 00:00:43

Welcome back to Ever Be.

14

: 00:00:45

Here we are.

15

: 00:00:47

Get up in here.

16

: 00:00:48

If you're watching on Patreon right now,

picture, well picture this if you're

17

: 00:00:54

not watching, I'm trying to climb into

a hammock one handed because she's

18

: 00:00:59

holding the mic in her other hand.

19

: 00:01:01

One handed.

20

: 00:01:02

'cause we're recording from the

beach or as they say in Mexico.

21

: 00:01:06

Uh, hamaca an hamaca.

22

: 00:01:09

It's where we're sitting from.

23

: 00:01:11

Thought it would be a fun and

kind of comfy place to record.

24

: 00:01:14

So here we are.

25

: 00:01:15

Welcome back, tray.

26

: 00:01:16

It's been a while since we've had you.

27

: 00:01:18

I would say that it would be

more comfortable if we were

28

: 00:01:20

laying down in the A mac.

29

: 00:01:22

Okay, well, let's not get too crazy.

30

: 00:01:24

Do you wanna put this under your feet?

31

: 00:01:25

Because it's really comfy for my feet.

32

: 00:01:28

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

33

: 00:01:28

Okay.

34

: 00:01:29

Just slide it over.

35

: 00:01:30

I got it.

36

: 00:01:30

Okay.

37

: 00:01:30

Okay.

38

: 00:01:31

Sliding, right.

39

: 00:01:31

Perfect.

40

: 00:01:32

Sliding over.

41

: 00:01:32

Oh, this is good.

42

: 00:01:33

Yeah.

43

: 00:01:34

It has been a while since

I've been on the pod.

44

: 00:01:35

Yeah.

45

: 00:01:36

So I'm happy to be back.

46

: 00:01:37

Give us a little life update.

47

: 00:01:40

Where are we at?

48

: 00:01:41

What are we doing?

49

: 00:01:43

Well, uh, s here a in Mexico, uh,

50

: 00:01:51

in,

51

: 00:01:59

um.

52

: 00:02:01

And that's all I'll have

to say about that for now.

53

: 00:02:03

Wow.

54

: 00:02:03

Can we give him a round of applause?

55

: 00:02:06

You did not expect that, did you?

56

: 00:02:08

No, I did not expect that.

57

: 00:02:09

That was so incredible.

58

: 00:02:10

And I didn't think you were

just gonna come on here and

59

: 00:02:13

just show off your Spanish.

60

: 00:02:15

Oh, that wasn't really

showing off, but just It was.

61

: 00:02:18

It was great.

62

: 00:02:19

But yes, we are here in Mexico.

63

: 00:02:21

Uh, I am in a Spanish immersion program.

64

: 00:02:24

Oh yeah.

65

: 00:02:24

For all those who didn't

understand what he just said.

66

: 00:02:26

Yeah.

67

: 00:02:26

Not everybody can hear

or understands that, um.

68

: 00:02:30

So Mari, if you didn't know, is

Colombian 100% Colombian and her

69

: 00:02:35

whole family speaks Spanish and we

want to raise our children bilingual.

70

: 00:02:39

And I wanna be able to communicate

with her extended family.

71

: 00:02:41

And it's always been part of our

plan for me to learn Spanish.

72

: 00:02:45

And I've picked up some here

and there just being around Mari

73

: 00:02:48

and her family over the years.

74

: 00:02:50

But um, we just felt like it

was time to just finally go and

75

: 00:02:55

do like an immersion program.

76

: 00:02:57

So we've been in Mexico for.

77

: 00:02:59

Three weeks.

78

: 00:03:00

We're on the start of our fourth

and final week here in Mexico.

79

: 00:03:03

Mm-hmm.

80

: 00:03:04

We have exactly one week left from today.

81

: 00:03:06

Exactly One week left.

82

: 00:03:07

Yeah, I know.

83

: 00:03:07

I saw that on the calendar.

84

: 00:03:09

It's crazy.

85

: 00:03:10

Yeah.

86

: 00:03:10

And so I've been going to Spanish school

every day from 8:30 AM to 1:00 PM and then

87

: 00:03:18

coming home and continuing to practice

Spanish and doing a little Spanglish with

88

: 00:03:21

Mari in the afternoons and, and obviously

working every day after school as well.

89

: 00:03:26

And in the meantime, while

Trey goes to school, I've been

90

: 00:03:30

putting some hours in of work.

91

: 00:03:32

So basically like what we've been doing

is Monday through Friday, we, most

92

: 00:03:36

of the time here we were living at.

93

: 00:03:38

Or living in the city and then

living at the beach on the weekends.

94

: 00:03:42

'cause his program's in the city so that

way he doesn't have to commute as far.

95

: 00:03:45

Um, and so then he would go to school and

I would usually explore and try some new

96

: 00:03:50

coffee shop, work there a couple hours.

97

: 00:03:53

And then he would come home in the

afternoon, we'd eat some lunch, and

98

: 00:03:56

then he'd get some work hours done.

99

: 00:03:58

And then we would kind of do something

in the evening, walk around, find a

100

: 00:04:00

restaurant to eat dinner at, and then just

kind of chill the rest of the evening and.

101

: 00:04:04

This week we're on the beach and so

I've been just having really chill days.

102

: 00:04:09

It's been so awesome getting up, working

out, spending some time, praying,

103

: 00:04:14

going on the beach, getting some good

vitamin D I'm trying to soak up all

104

: 00:04:18

the vitamin DI can before we go back

and then putting some hours in of

105

: 00:04:23

work, um, in the afternoon and evening.

106

: 00:04:27

'cause like when Trey gets home,

he has to work and so it's not.

107

: 00:04:31

His speech time, not a, not as much.

108

: 00:04:34

He's not getting as much speech time and

so then like I'm kind of saving some of

109

: 00:04:38

my work for the afternoon too, so that

I can, so I'm not just sitting there

110

: 00:04:42

next to him like, Jay, let's go play.

111

: 00:04:44

Yes.

112

: 00:04:45

Which so kind of happens.

113

: 00:04:45

It still kind happens, but I

don't, I try and do my best.

114

: 00:04:49

Um, so yeah, so let's kick it off.

115

: 00:04:52

I'm trying to go back to my

segments 'cause I realize I keep

116

: 00:04:55

forgetting to do my segments.

117

: 00:04:56

So let's kick it off

with an ever be moment.

118

: 00:04:59

Okay.

119

: 00:05:00

Yeah.

120

: 00:05:00

So how have you seen God

work in your life recently?

121

: 00:05:04

Well, uh, there was a, an

evening, two weeks ago.

122

: 00:05:10

It was our first week, uh, in the

city and the first week of me doing

123

: 00:05:14

the Spanish program, and it was the

evening, it was the end of a great day.

124

: 00:05:21

We had just come back from dinner

and I was just sitting in the chair

125

: 00:05:24

in our hotel room and just, I was

just filled with so much gratitude.

126

: 00:05:29

So much gratitude that this is our life

and that we have the Lord has provided

127

: 00:05:36

so much abundance and has given us

like this job and, uh, to be able to

128

: 00:05:41

be here in Mexico and still work and,

um, and to be able to do an Spanish

129

: 00:05:46

immersion program, like what the heck?

130

: 00:05:47

Like, be living here in

Mexico for an entire month.

131

: 00:05:50

What, um, it's very cool.

132

: 00:05:53

And yeah, I was just filled

with so much gratitude, um, and

133

: 00:05:57

just like my heart was like.

134

: 00:05:59

Swelled with Thanksgiving and love

for, uh, for you, for our life and for

135

: 00:06:04

God and just, uh, his providence and

yeah, it was just a really nice moment.

136

: 00:06:10

Aw, I love that.

137

: 00:06:12

My ever be moment.

138

: 00:06:15

Gosh, I feel like I've had a couple here,

but we have a family friend out here and

139

: 00:06:21

the mom of the family, she works with

Encounter Ministries out here in Mexico,

140

: 00:06:28

and if you haven't heard of Encounter

Ministries, it's like a charismatic

141

: 00:06:33

Catholic ministry that helps build up

disciples who want to live life in the

142

: 00:06:38

Holy Spirit, um, and want to use their.

143

: 00:06:42

Spiritual gifts to build up the church.

144

: 00:06:45

And so they had an event recently

that was for physical healing

145

: 00:06:49

and praise and worship and

prayer, and it was so beautiful.

146

: 00:06:53

It was incredible.

147

: 00:06:54

Yeah, it was awesome.

148

: 00:06:55

Like we hadn't been in to an event

like that I think in a while.

149

: 00:06:59

And when we were missionaries, we were

oly obviously exposed to stuff like

150

: 00:07:03

that a lot more and we're around those

kind of events and movements a lot.

151

: 00:07:07

And since we've left.

152

: 00:07:09

We haven't had many opportunities

really besides seek mm-hmm.

153

: 00:07:13

To like be in big crowds

like that and Yeah.

154

: 00:07:15

And be an entire church packed full of

people praising the Lord and mm-hmm.

155

: 00:07:21

Yeah.

156

: 00:07:21

And just like on fire for their faith.

157

: 00:07:24

Yeah.

158

: 00:07:25

So I really, really loved it.

159

: 00:07:27

It was like an hour of adoration,

praise and worship all in Spanish,

160

: 00:07:31

by the way, which I had never been

to anything like this in Spanish.

161

: 00:07:33

I really, and it was fuego.

162

: 00:07:35

It was ue No, seriously.

163

: 00:07:37

It was so fun praising and doing

praise and worship in Spanish.

164

: 00:07:40

It, Trey was getting into it.

165

: 00:07:41

He was like,

166

: 00:07:44

see?

167

: 00:07:48

And um, and I, yeah, it was like, it was

beautiful for me because Spanish is like.

168

: 00:07:55

My family's language, like my

mother tongue, you know what I mean?

169

: 00:07:59

Like it's like, like for me, I only

speak Spanish really with my family.

170

: 00:08:05

So it feels very familial.

171

: 00:08:07

It feels almost like an intimate language.

172

: 00:08:09

Like if we can speak Spanish,

there's like a new level of

173

: 00:08:12

intimacy like in our relationship.

174

: 00:08:13

'cause I'm like, Ooh, you like

understand like what I grew up in.

175

: 00:08:18

You know what I mean?

176

: 00:08:18

Mm-hmm.

177

: 00:08:19

Totally.

178

: 00:08:19

And so to like.

179

: 00:08:21

Speak to the Lord in Spanish and

sing to the Lord in Spanish was like

180

: 00:08:24

kind of a new experience for me.

181

: 00:08:25

And usually, I'll be honest, like when

we go to Spanish mass, I feel like the,

182

: 00:08:29

the mass songs in Spanish just aren't it.

183

: 00:08:34

They're not it for me.

184

: 00:08:35

And they're usually very similar

and just feel so old schooly.

185

: 00:08:40

But this was like.

186

: 00:08:41

This was like new modern Christian

music meets Spanish worship.

187

: 00:08:47

Yeah.

188

: 00:08:47

And I hadn't heard that yet.

189

: 00:08:48

Yep.

190

: 00:08:49

So I was kind of loving it.

191

: 00:08:50

I know.

192

: 00:08:50

It was great.

193

: 00:08:51

And the band was awesome.

194

: 00:08:52

Band was awesome.

195

: 00:08:53

And then, um, there was space for

prayer in like the whole community

196

: 00:08:57

that was gathered, prayed for each

other and healing in different ways.

197

: 00:09:01

And then we broke off into like

smaller prayer groups if you

198

: 00:09:03

wanted an individual prayer.

199

: 00:09:04

And the whole thing

was just really moving.

200

: 00:09:06

And Yeah, we were there for like,

what, two, two and a half hours?

201

: 00:09:08

Yeah, like three hours, dude, three.

202

: 00:09:09

Yeah.

203

: 00:09:10

Oh yeah.

204

: 00:09:10

It was three hours.

205

: 00:09:11

We were there for three hours.

206

: 00:09:12

Right.

207

: 00:09:12

Yeah.

208

: 00:09:13

So God's always working and

it just re-inspired me to just

209

: 00:09:18

call upon the Holy Spirit more.

210

: 00:09:20

Mm-hmm.

211

: 00:09:20

Like the Lord says, like, I'm

gonna give you, I'm leaving

212

: 00:09:25

so I can send you my spirit.

213

: 00:09:26

And he's gonna give you.

214

: 00:09:29

The grace to do greater things

than I did, like Totally.

215

: 00:09:32

We gotta call upon him.

216

: 00:09:34

Yep.

217

: 00:09:34

And if you wanna call upon the Holy Spirit

to give me the gift of language to learn

218

: 00:09:37

Spanish, that's what I'm praying for.

219

: 00:09:40

You can do that.

220

: 00:09:41

You can pray for that as well, you guys.

221

: 00:09:44

Um, okay.

222

: 00:09:45

Well let's jump into the topic of the day.

223

: 00:09:48

We are doing q and a and

answering assumptions.

224

: 00:09:51

Okay, great.

225

: 00:09:52

Great.

226

: 00:09:52

Keep ahead of us.

227

: 00:09:53

I have not, I have, I had no

idea what we were doing today.

228

: 00:09:55

You just gave me the mic.

229

: 00:09:56

So that's what we're doing today.

230

: 00:09:58

I've not seen these

questions and or assumptions.

231

: 00:10:01

Yep, yep, yep.

232

: 00:10:01

And I feel like it's maybe been a while

since we did it and these are always fun.

233

: 00:10:07

Um, so that's what we're doing today.

234

: 00:10:10

You ready?

235

: 00:10:10

Okay.

236

: 00:10:10

I'm ready.

237

: 00:10:11

Okay.

238

: 00:10:13

All right.

239

: 00:10:13

Lot of questions.

240

: 00:10:15

I'm gonna just shout out

a bunch of 'em right now.

241

: 00:10:19

Can I have these questions

or are these assumptions?

242

: 00:10:20

There's both.

243

: 00:10:21

Okay.

244

: 00:10:22

Okay, let's just see.

245

: 00:10:23

I'm gonna like shout a bunch out and

then Trey, you can tell me like if any

246

: 00:10:26

stand out to you that you wanna answer.

247

: 00:10:27

Okay.

248

: 00:10:29

How long did you date

before you got engaged?

249

: 00:10:31

Tips for intentional time

together with busy schedules.

250

: 00:10:34

We love you guys.

251

: 00:10:36

Oh.

252

: 00:10:36

So sweet.

253

: 00:10:38

Do you ever get annoyed constantly

having to film your life slash the

254

: 00:10:41

li The cost of living a public life?

255

: 00:10:43

Hmm.

256

: 00:10:44

I would love to answer this.

257

: 00:10:45

What does your husband do for work?

258

: 00:10:47

Yeah.

259

: 00:10:49

Uh, running registry and necessities.

260

: 00:10:52

Um, how is NFP going?

261

: 00:10:53

I'm getting married this year

and I'm overwhelmed by it.

262

: 00:10:57

Recent Catholic Convert and

so glad I came across ever be.

263

: 00:11:00

Yay.

264

: 00:11:01

Um, do men experience interest

and crushes the same way girls do?

265

: 00:11:05

If so, why don't they act on it?

266

: 00:11:08

An assumption is you don't own a home yet.

267

: 00:11:11

You guys had to learn how

to do finances together.

268

: 00:11:15

A question of, I feel so discouraged

finding a Catholic community.

269

: 00:11:18

What is your advice?

270

: 00:11:20

Someone asking, do you mind

sharing an update on all the

271

: 00:11:22

fertility work you're doing?

272

: 00:11:23

Prayers for both of you.

273

: 00:11:24

There's actually a lot of requests for

fertility update, um, how to find Good

274

: 00:11:30

Catholic friends as a married couple.

275

: 00:11:33

An aspiring entrepreneur here.

276

: 00:11:35

What is your plan with running

a business and having kids?

277

: 00:11:39

How are you both dealing with

living with uncertainty with.

278

: 00:11:42

Kids, I've noticed lots

can't cope with uncertainty.

279

: 00:11:44

So how has waiting and not having

control over this changed your

280

: 00:11:48

relationship with God and your marriage?

281

: 00:11:50

Great questions.

282

: 00:11:51

Yeah.

283

: 00:11:51

Honestly, I'm impressed.

284

: 00:11:53

There are some good questions that

were not thoughtful questions,

285

: 00:11:56

not just your like standard

questions that we've answered time.

286

: 00:11:59

How do you know he's the,

although I love that.

287

: 00:12:01

Okay, great.

288

: 00:12:02

So where do we start?

289

: 00:12:03

Do you just wanna start like, I

think I wanna get through as many

290

: 00:12:06

of these as we can, so I think we

should just kind of rapid fire.

291

: 00:12:10

We can spend a little bit longer

on some of them, but, okay.

292

: 00:12:13

Um, just funny, there's

only two assumptions.

293

: 00:12:15

I'm kind of surprised some of these.

294

: 00:12:17

Uh, we can just, uh,

rapid fire, I feel like.

295

: 00:12:20

Okay.

296

: 00:12:20

While you pick a question.

297

: 00:12:21

Rapid fire assumptions.

298

: 00:12:23

Yes.

299

: 00:12:23

We do own a home.

300

: 00:12:25

And yeah, we did have to learn how to do

finances together, but also it wasn't very

301

: 00:12:29

hard because we were just out of college.

302

: 00:12:34

Yeah.

303

: 00:12:34

So we didn't really have

a finance plan for life.

304

: 00:12:36

We didn't really have monies before we

got married, so it was all, so being

305

: 00:12:40

married made it easier, honestly.

306

: 00:12:42

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

307

: 00:12:45

No, it was great 'cause

we learned it together.

308

: 00:12:46

Yeah.

309

: 00:12:47

All right.

310

: 00:12:47

Pick a question.

311

: 00:12:48

Okay.

312

: 00:12:49

I mean, some of these quick ones.

313

: 00:12:50

How long did you date

before we got married?

314

: 00:12:52

Uh, a year and a half dating,

and a year and a half engagement.

315

: 00:12:56

And then we got married.

316

: 00:12:57

Mm-hmm.

317

: 00:12:58

Uh, we just celebrated five

years of marriage and eight

318

: 00:13:03

years of knowing each other.

319

: 00:13:04

Or eight years of dating each other.

320

: 00:13:07

In two?

321

: 00:13:07

No, in like a week.

322

: 00:13:09

In like a week.

323

: 00:13:09

It'll be exactly eight years dating, eight

years of knowing or dating each other.

324

: 00:13:12

Yeah.

325

: 00:13:14

Because we're still dating.

326

: 00:13:17

Tips for intentional time

together with busy schedules.

327

: 00:13:21

Yep.

328

: 00:13:22

Find time for connection.

329

: 00:13:25

Yes.

330

: 00:13:25

We've been talking about this.

331

: 00:13:25

It's a big topic in our marriage.

332

: 00:13:27

Yep.

333

: 00:13:28

First thing that comes to mind

is protect your meal times.

334

: 00:13:31

Like, Ooh, good one.

335

: 00:13:32

At least dinners if you can.

336

: 00:13:34

We obviously have the same job,

so we end up eating like all meals

337

: 00:13:38

together, but we both work from home.

338

: 00:13:39

If you, if you work different jobs or

don't see each other throughout the

339

: 00:13:43

day, if you could do both breakfast

and dinner, at the very least, dinner

340

: 00:13:48

together, I feel like that's a really

great way to start and don't, if you

341

: 00:13:52

don't get to see a lot of each other

during the day, don't throw the TV on.

342

: 00:13:56

Don't be scrolling.

343

: 00:13:57

Don't have laptops open.

344

: 00:13:59

Don't have any distractions

during those meal times.

345

: 00:14:01

Just have it be like FaceTime you get with

your spouse where you actually get to hear

346

: 00:14:06

from each other and actually talk about

your life and how you're doing and stuff.

347

: 00:14:09

Yeah.

348

: 00:14:09

That's a great, uh, great suggestion.

349

: 00:14:12

I would also say, uh, before you get into

bed at night or like when you get into

350

: 00:14:17

bed, I would, I would try to plan your

bedtime so that you are not dead, dead

351

: 00:14:22

tired or like you're not falling asleep on

the couch, so that then you actually have

352

: 00:14:26

the energy to spend at least five minutes

chatting, um, before you go to sleep.

353

: 00:14:32

And with that, like go

to bed at the same time.

354

: 00:14:35

I actually think there's a lot of couples

who don't go to bed at the same time.

355

: 00:14:38

Mm-hmm.

356

: 00:14:39

I think that's actually kind of

pretty normal common for people.

357

: 00:14:41

Yeah.

358

: 00:14:42

Interesting.

359

: 00:14:42

Um, so my advice would be go to bed at

the same time, time unwind together.

360

: 00:14:46

And naturally when you're unwinding

you can do that with your spouse

361

: 00:14:49

and yeah, spend time together.

362

: 00:14:51

Um, one last thing.

363

: 00:14:52

Outside of that plan, at the very

least, a monthly date night and put

364

: 00:14:57

it on the calendar, on the date.

365

: 00:14:59

Like the number date of your

anniversary, So you remember it easily?

366

: 00:15:03

Yeah.

367

: 00:15:04

And then it happens every

month and it's on the calendar.

368

: 00:15:06

Yep.

369

: 00:15:07

Okay.

370

: 00:15:07

What does your husband do for work?

371

: 00:15:10

That's me, I'm the husband and

I do, uh, west Coast Catholic.

372

: 00:15:15

Uh, so I run the majority of

the business side, the shop

373

: 00:15:18

side of West Coast Catholic.

374

: 00:15:19

Like, let me just say something like,

everybody thinks West Coast Catholic and

375

: 00:15:23

they think like my face probably, right?

376

: 00:15:26

Maybe I've been mm-hmm.

377

: 00:15:26

The face of West Coast

Catholic for a long time.

378

: 00:15:29

It's a gr it's a women's brand.

379

: 00:15:30

Yep.

380

: 00:15:31

And I think if people really know

about like us and what we do,

381

: 00:15:35

they know you're heavily involved,

but a lot of people don't.

382

: 00:15:37

No.

383

: 00:15:38

Yeah.

384

: 00:15:38

Trey runs West Coast Catholic.

385

: 00:15:40

Mm-hmm.

386

: 00:15:41

Like this business would not

be anywhere without Trey.

387

: 00:15:43

He does more than I do at this point.

388

: 00:15:45

Like he, he is West Coast Catholic.

389

: 00:15:48

Yeah.

390

: 00:15:48

Oh, thank you.

391

: 00:15:49

So that's what he does well.

392

: 00:15:50

Um, and then helps me with

absolutely everything else that I do.

393

: 00:15:53

Yeah.

394

: 00:15:53

So we started West

Coast Catholic together.

395

: 00:15:55

So I was from the beginning just

as much involved as Mari and then.

396

: 00:16:00

About two years ago, Mari started

focusing more on her social

397

: 00:16:04

media and her personal Instagram.

398

: 00:16:07

And I took over pretty much

all operations of the business.

399

: 00:16:10

I've always was doing it in the past,

but, and management, team management.

400

: 00:16:13

Yeah, all operations, team

management, um, manufacturer

401

: 00:16:16

relations, product development,

finances, the whole, the whole thing.

402

: 00:16:22

Um, and then, yeah, and then we obviously

have a team, but yeah, that's what I do.

403

: 00:16:27

Love it and then I help Mari with all of

her tech or operational things with her

404

: 00:16:32

business and strategy with her business.

405

: 00:16:34

Big IT guy for sure.

406

: 00:16:36

I would not say I'm a big IT guy, but

I've learned you're my guy along the guy.

407

: 00:16:42

Do you ever get annoyed constantly

having to film your life?

408

: 00:16:46

That would be a question for me.

409

: 00:16:48

Yes.

410

: 00:16:48

I would say yes and no.

411

: 00:16:50

I would say like there's

definitely been seasons.

412

: 00:16:52

I've been making content for

eight years now and sharing

413

: 00:16:54

about my life for eight years.

414

: 00:16:56

And so it's kind of crazy 'cause at this

point it's the majority of my adult life.

415

: 00:17:01

Yeah, true.

416

: 00:17:01

Wow.

417

: 00:17:01

So I'm used to it and if I didn't

love it, I wouldn't be doing it.

418

: 00:17:05

Yeah.

419

: 00:17:05

And so I, I do love it.

420

: 00:17:08

I love sharing about our life.

421

: 00:17:10

I love sharing about, um, the faith.

422

: 00:17:14

Centered marriage, Christ

Centered Living homemaking.

423

: 00:17:16

And I don't know if you guys have maybe

noticed or not, but I think over the

424

: 00:17:20

past few years, like when you're first

starting out in content, Christian,

425

: 00:17:23

you're figuring out a lot of stuff out.

426

: 00:17:25

In the past few years, I've kind of

started to notice what are parts or

427

: 00:17:29

details or areas of my life that I'm

actually not willing to share publicly,

428

: 00:17:32

and then what am I, and that gave me

so much more freedom to feel like.

429

: 00:17:36

I don't have to film every

single part of my life.

430

: 00:17:40

Mm-hmm.

431

: 00:17:40

There's actually a lot that you

don't see behind the screen.

432

: 00:17:43

Mm-hmm.

433

: 00:17:43

But yeah, so that's given me freedom

to know like, what am I not sharing?

434

: 00:17:47

What am I sharing?

435

: 00:17:48

And usually what I am sharing,

I genuinely want to share and

436

: 00:17:51

I'm excited to share about.

437

: 00:17:53

But sure.

438

: 00:17:53

Like any job, there's burnout.

439

: 00:17:55

Like any job, it gets old sometimes,

and there's just seasons where like,

440

: 00:17:59

there's, I don't know, just yeah.

441

: 00:18:01

Seasons where you're like, oh gosh.

442

: 00:18:02

Like I don't really feel like.

443

: 00:18:04

Taking my phone out all the

time and recording myself.

444

: 00:18:06

And I've given myself a lot more

grace to take kind of a step back

445

: 00:18:10

from posting as consistently or being

hard on myself about sharing X, Y, Z.

446

: 00:18:15

So I've learned a lot of just

flexibility with how social media

447

: 00:18:20

has changed, how I feel about it.

448

: 00:18:22

Mm-hmm.

449

: 00:18:22

What I feel like is, um, prudent

and responsible to share while

450

: 00:18:27

still keeping a lot of value and.

451

: 00:18:31

Valuable content for mm-hmm.

452

: 00:18:33

Our community.

453

: 00:18:34

So yes.

454

: 00:18:34

And follow up question to that.

455

: 00:18:36

Yeah.

456

: 00:18:37

Uh, what is the cost of

living a public life?

457

: 00:18:41

Yeah.

458

: 00:18:42

Um, briefly.

459

: 00:18:45

Yeah.

460

: 00:18:45

Or is there one?

461

: 00:18:47

Yeah, no, there definitely is a cost.

462

: 00:18:48

And I mean, you're just opening

yourself up to commentary.

463

: 00:18:52

Commentary on your life

and people's opinions.

464

: 00:18:55

Yes.

465

: 00:18:55

You're opening yourself up to

commentary on people's opinions.

466

: 00:18:58

And I will say.

467

: 00:19:01

One thing, I think the Lord

knows h what everyone can handle.

468

: 00:19:05

Right.

469

: 00:19:06

And I'm actually extremely shocked at

the little amount of hate and intrus.

470

: 00:19:14

Mm-hmm.

471

: 00:19:14

That I get on my account in comparison

to so many people that I know.

472

: 00:19:18

I don't know why.

473

: 00:19:19

Great job you guys for being respectful.

474

: 00:19:20

So thanks for just being so

amazing is what I'm saying.

475

: 00:19:23

Like that comes down to my community.

476

: 00:19:25

You guys are genuinely.

477

: 00:19:27

Solid, great quality people.

478

: 00:19:29

Thank you.

479

: 00:19:31

Um, maybe I'm not posting controversial

enough content, which I don't care man.

480

: 00:19:35

Like that's fine with me.

481

: 00:19:37

Um, but that's helped me a lot to

like not wanna get off social media.

482

: 00:19:42

I know a lot of people wanna get off all

the time because the more you share your

483

: 00:19:44

life right, the more people comment on it.

484

: 00:19:46

And that, that there has been a

little bit of that here and there.

485

: 00:19:50

Of course.

486

: 00:19:50

Yeah.

487

: 00:19:51

And I think another aspect that's hard

too, and I think once we have kids in the

488

: 00:19:56

future, we'll be navigating even more too.

489

: 00:19:59

It's just kind of like, wow.

490

: 00:20:02

It's going with what I was just saying,

like how much do you wanna be sharing?

491

: 00:20:05

What are all the details

you wanna be sharing?

492

: 00:20:06

So you just have to be more cognizant

about what you're posting on social media.

493

: 00:20:10

Whereas a regular person whose

life isn't public, you don't

494

: 00:20:13

think twice about what you post.

495

: 00:20:15

Yeah.

496

: 00:20:15

You're just like, I wanna share

this with my friends and family.

497

: 00:20:17

So I post it.

498

: 00:20:18

But now we live.

499

: 00:20:20

In a dark world where nobody can share

pictures of their families with their

500

: 00:20:24

kids because people do really creepy

things with the pictures of their kids.

501

: 00:20:27

And so now I have to think about

like, gosh, when we have kids, like,

502

: 00:20:30

mm-hmm I wanna share content of our

kids and show pictures and everything,

503

: 00:20:34

but like, is that responsible or not?

504

: 00:20:37

You know?

505

: 00:20:37

So it just comes with an extra

layer of discernment and being

506

: 00:20:42

prudent with what you're sharing.

507

: 00:20:43

Okay, great.

508

: 00:20:45

Good answer, ma.

509

: 00:20:46

Thanks.

510

: 00:20:47

Rapid fire, this one,

wedding registry necessities.

511

: 00:20:51

Put the expensive stuff on your registry.

512

: 00:20:53

Yeah, I think hundred percent.

513

: 00:20:54

A lot of people shy away from

that because they feel bad.

514

: 00:20:57

They're like, oh, like I don't wanna

make people feel like they have to

515

: 00:20:59

buy the expensive thing or like,

I'm asking for the expensive thing.

516

: 00:21:03

Like, no, put it on your registry.

517

: 00:21:04

Well, and like the, they have

complete freedom to choose

518

: 00:21:07

whatever is on your registry.

519

: 00:21:08

Like they don't have to buy this.

520

: 00:21:09

Exactly.

521

: 00:21:10

What I'm saying is like,

put it on your registry.

522

: 00:21:11

If someone doesn't wanna buy the.

523

: 00:21:13

$400 item or the $300 item.

524

: 00:21:14

They won't, I mean, don't put

only 500 items on your registry.

525

: 00:21:18

Yeah.

526

: 00:21:18

But like, have some variety.

527

: 00:21:20

But yes, don't shy away from

just putting stuff on there.

528

: 00:21:21

Yes.

529

: 00:21:22

Like we put stuff on our registry,

we're like, we have no expectation.

530

: 00:21:25

Like nobody's gonna ever buy this for us.

531

: 00:21:27

And then like, somebody bought

it and we were like, what?

532

: 00:21:30

Thank goodness.

533

: 00:21:30

We all on our, all the most expensive

stuff on our registry got purchased.

534

: 00:21:33

Yeah.

535

: 00:21:34

Like the KitchenAid.

536

: 00:21:35

And a mattress.

537

: 00:21:36

A mattress.

538

: 00:21:37

And that was hilarious.

539

: 00:21:38

I don't even know what

the, the other things were.

540

: 00:21:39

I know there were a couple

things on there that were like.

541

: 00:21:41

500 bucks plus and like they

purchased it and we didn't expect

542

: 00:21:45

it to, but we're like, we're

gonna throw it up just in case.

543

: 00:21:47

And it was awesome.

544

: 00:21:48

So.

545

: 00:21:48

So a mattress?

546

: 00:21:49

Mattress, definitely.

547

: 00:21:50

Like, we didn't, I mean, we

were just college students.

548

: 00:21:52

We didn't have a mattress, so

we threw a mattress on there

549

: 00:21:54

and someone got it for us.

550

: 00:21:56

Yeah.

551

: 00:21:56

Uh, espresso machine.

552

: 00:21:57

Oh, definitely.

553

: 00:21:58

Must get a nice one.

554

: 00:21:59

Get a bre.

555

: 00:22:01

Frame tv.

556

: 00:22:02

Ooh yes.

557

: 00:22:03

A Frame TV is A Frame tv.

558

: 00:22:05

So Fire.

559

: 00:22:05

It's a great one.

560

: 00:22:06

We, that's a fire one.

561

: 00:22:08

Ooh, the Beast Blender.

562

: 00:22:09

I love the Beast Blender.

563

: 00:22:10

That's an Amazon.

564

: 00:22:11

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

565

: 00:22:12

You can get off another place

too and then get the fun things

566

: 00:22:14

you're not gonna buy yourself.

567

: 00:22:15

I already said KitchenAid.

568

: 00:22:16

Oh, did I?

569

: 00:22:17

You said that that was

an example as one of we.

570

: 00:22:19

Oh, a hundred percent.

571

: 00:22:20

Get yourself a kitchen or

put a KitchenAid on there.

572

: 00:22:22

Super nice pans.

573

: 00:22:24

Like super, super nice, really nice pans.

574

: 00:22:25

I would just say really nice knives.

575

: 00:22:26

Super nice kitchen equipment.

576

: 00:22:28

So knives, pans.

577

: 00:22:30

Uh, nice, uh, plates and

like, what's it called?

578

: 00:22:35

Uh, plates wear serving platters?

579

: 00:22:37

No, like silverware.

580

: 00:22:38

There's like glassware.

581

: 00:22:39

And then what's the equivalent for plates?

582

: 00:22:41

Just plates.

583

: 00:22:42

Plates.

584

: 00:22:43

And bowls.

585

: 00:22:43

Dishes.

586

: 00:22:44

Dishes.

587

: 00:22:45

Or like dishware, I dunno.

588

: 00:22:47

Yeah.

589

: 00:22:47

Dishware.

590

: 00:22:47

Anyways, I would, I would

say like, put like nice.

591

: 00:22:50

Dishware and, and plates

and serving plats.

592

: 00:22:53

And then put the fun stuff that

you're not gonna buy yourself, but

593

: 00:22:56

you can use for date nights and for

hosting, this is obviously coming from

594

: 00:23:00

a couple who loves to cook and host.

595

: 00:23:01

'cause we've mentioned like 90% kitchen

things, but like a, um, what's it

596

: 00:23:06

called, fondue pot And pasta maker

or pasta maker is two things that

597

: 00:23:11

we put on our registry where it's

like a pasta roller slash cutter.

598

: 00:23:15

It's called a pasta maker.

599

: 00:23:17

Um, we put that on a registry

and it's been so fun.

600

: 00:23:20

One of our go-to double date nights that

I highly recommend when you're a newlywed

601

: 00:23:23

couple is to make fresh pasta together.

602

: 00:23:26

It's so easy.

603

: 00:23:28

It's way easier than you think.

604

: 00:23:29

Way easier than you think.

605

: 00:23:30

And the pasta maker makes it so easy

to roll out the pasta and cut the

606

: 00:23:36

pasta and it's such a fun activity

to get to know another couple.

607

: 00:23:38

So we've used that one so many

times and it's nice 'cause you're

608

: 00:23:42

like doing an activity so you're

not like forced to just like.

609

: 00:23:44

Make conversational all time,

especially if it's somebody

610

: 00:23:46

that you don't know very well.

611

: 00:23:49

Um, the other one I was

gonna say is a griddle.

612

: 00:23:52

We use a griddle very often all the time.

613

: 00:23:54

Yeah.

614

: 00:23:54

Okay.

615

: 00:23:55

Uh, how's N Fs p going?

616

: 00:23:56

I'm getting married this

year and overwhelmed by it.

617

: 00:23:59

I freaking love NFP.

618

: 00:24:01

I just like when I, it's funny 'cause

I was just about to say we don't like.

619

: 00:24:06

Like in our situation, like

we don't have NFP anymore.

620

: 00:24:08

Well, we, uh, in the traditional

sense, like, in like, oh, like the

621

: 00:24:13

traditional Creon or Marquette method.

622

: 00:24:16

Yeah.

623

: 00:24:16

Yeah.

624

: 00:24:17

We are not like doing that exclusively,

but, um, the, I loved doing, I loved

625

: 00:24:22

learning about it, and I, I've heard

the story from other men as well.

626

: 00:24:27

They loved, like being a part of

the class and learning about this.

627

: 00:24:30

I've heard it from multiple men

that they've really enjoyed it and

628

: 00:24:33

I, that was my experience as well.

629

: 00:24:35

Um, and so why, because why?

630

: 00:24:39

Yeah.

631

: 00:24:40

'cause it, it gives men so much more

understanding into the women's body

632

: 00:24:45

and their health and what's going

on and, and their hormones and like.

633

: 00:24:51

Their health or hormones like

that is like largely affecting

634

: 00:24:54

a huge part of their experience.

635

: 00:24:58

And that then in turn

affects like your marriage.

636

: 00:25:01

And it's just, it's incredible to be able

to like understand just like where she's

637

: 00:25:06

coming from, um, where she's coming from,

but also like how to best love your wife

638

: 00:25:10

in the different parts of her cycle.

639

: 00:25:12

Um, and, and it was cool to

just like know okay, like.

640

: 00:25:18

Like if you, once you learn it, you

can know a certainty, like when or when

641

: 00:25:22

not to, like when, um, she's ovulating.

642

: 00:25:25

So you know, if you're not to have a baby.

643

: 00:25:27

So practically it was also very

practical when to have a baby.

644

: 00:25:31

Yeah.

645

: 00:25:32

Um, so I would say if you're

overwhelmed, I think that's normal.

646

: 00:25:36

I think it's a lot of information.

647

: 00:25:38

We were lucky that we had a really good.

648

: 00:25:40

I dunno what you call it, practitioner.

649

: 00:25:42

She's called a Creighton practitioner.

650

: 00:25:44

Creighton practitioner.

651

: 00:25:45

She's incredible.

652

: 00:25:46

Melissa Grace Tabata will make

sure to link her in the show notes.

653

: 00:25:49

Um, so you definitely

need a really good one.

654

: 00:25:53

I've known people, or I've heard from

people who they just go to like a one,

655

: 00:25:57

like group class and they just feel

like so confused and overwhelmed by it.

656

: 00:26:01

I would definitely pay the money

to have like one-on-ones with

657

: 00:26:05

the practitioner so that you can.

658

: 00:26:07

Um, really understand it.

659

: 00:26:09

We booked her full package and we met

with her once a month for like a year.

660

: 00:26:13

For like a year.

661

: 00:26:14

Yeah.

662

: 00:26:15

And I think out of anybody I knew,

I felt the most confident on how to

663

: 00:26:19

track my cycle because I was being

followed up with every single month

664

: 00:26:22

for like a year from, from when we got

engaged to like, into us being married.

665

: 00:26:28

Mm-hmm.

666

: 00:26:28

And so it was really great to

have someone like walking with

667

: 00:26:32

you and answering your questions.

668

: 00:26:34

So, yeah, it's a little bit

expensive, but guys, it's so worth it.

669

: 00:26:37

And like we spend thousands

of dollars on wedding stuff.

670

: 00:26:41

Like this is worth the investment.

671

: 00:26:43

Definitely.

672

: 00:26:44

Anything else?

673

: 00:26:45

I said a lot about that.

674

: 00:26:46

Do you as a woman, have

anything you wanted to say?

675

: 00:26:48

No.

676

: 00:26:48

I love what you had to say.

677

: 00:26:50

Okay.

678

: 00:26:52

Um, the only thing I would say with

that is just that it gets easier.

679

: 00:26:56

Like once you do it every

single day, it gets easier.

680

: 00:26:59

Do men experience interests

crushes the same way girls do?

681

: 00:27:03

If so, why don't they act on it?

682

: 00:27:05

Uh, that's a funny question.

683

: 00:27:07

Um, yes, definitely.

684

: 00:27:09

I mean, I don't, of course, well, not,

I just crush on my wife every day.

685

: 00:27:13

Well, dude, but, um, but like,

no, think back to like before

686

: 00:27:15

you were married, right?

687

: 00:27:16

Right.

688

: 00:27:16

So like, I'll give the girls

experience and you tell me whether

689

: 00:27:18

that's how you experienced it or not.

690

: 00:27:20

Okay.

691

: 00:27:20

I got it.

692

: 00:27:21

I got it.

693

: 00:27:21

Like that girl has a crush, sees

a boy in class, and is like,

694

: 00:27:25

oh my gosh, he's super cute.

695

: 00:27:28

Tries to kind of like steal looks

throughout like class to kind of make

696

: 00:27:32

sure like that he is cute and every time

she looks she's like, oh my gosh, wait.

697

: 00:27:34

Yeah, he is super cute.

698

: 00:27:35

Like, I hope he's noticing me.

699

: 00:27:37

Is he noticing me?

700

: 00:27:38

Like, how does my hair look?

701

: 00:27:39

Like?

702

: 00:27:40

I hope I have a cute outfit on today.

703

: 00:27:41

Like maybe, maybe he'll

talk to me after class.

704

: 00:27:44

Like, is there a way I

could maybe talk to him?

705

: 00:27:47

Drops pencil.

706

: 00:27:48

He picks it up behind her and he's

like, oh, you dropped your pencil.

707

: 00:27:52

And she's like, ah, yes.

708

: 00:27:54

Point of contact.

709

: 00:27:55

Then you leave class and you're

like thinking about him all day.

710

: 00:27:58

You're like, oh my gosh.

711

: 00:27:59

Like he was super cute.

712

: 00:28:00

Like, I wonder if I have any

other classes with him, like,

713

: 00:28:02

when am I gonna see him again?

714

: 00:28:04

Like.

715

: 00:28:05

Is he friends with anybody?

716

: 00:28:06

I know.

717

: 00:28:07

Like, and then you start talking

to your friends about it and

718

: 00:28:09

you're like, okay, I have to tell

you about this guy in my class.

719

: 00:28:11

Like, oh my gosh, you start

telling your friends about it

720

: 00:28:14

and then, you know what I mean?

721

: 00:28:15

Yeah.

722

: 00:28:16

I would say the guys have the exact

same experience with one third of the

723

: 00:28:19

thoughts and one third of the, the

words to experience to describe it.

724

: 00:28:23

Okay.

725

: 00:28:24

Okay.

726

: 00:28:24

Fair.

727

: 00:28:24

But I would say the

experience is the same.

728

: 00:28:25

They're very, very similar.

729

: 00:28:27

Um, like guys, definitely.

730

: 00:28:29

Notice women, they definitely

like try to steal looks.

731

: 00:28:32

They definitely like try

to like place themselves in

732

: 00:28:36

similar situations or near them.

733

: 00:28:37

They definitely get nervous

trying to talk to 'em.

734

: 00:28:39

They definitely, uh, like think

about them when they're not with 'em.

735

: 00:28:43

Oh yeah.

736

: 00:28:43

So it's the same.

737

: 00:28:44

I would say it's the same.

738

: 00:28:45

So then the second half of the

question is why don't they act on it?

739

: 00:28:48

So, and, and so this is where this

would, this would just pertain

740

: 00:28:52

to men who don't act on it.

741

: 00:28:53

'cause there are men that do.

742

: 00:28:54

Mm-hmm.

743

: 00:28:55

But if a guy's not acting on

it, why do you think that is?

744

: 00:28:59

One, I would probably say it's just

either insecurity, they're just timid,

745

: 00:29:02

they're afraid they're, they have had

poor experiences in the past that makes

746

: 00:29:07

them more scared to do it in the future.

747

: 00:29:09

Um, maybe they think you're

out of their league, down.

748

: 00:29:11

Maybe, maybe you're out of their league.

749

: 00:29:13

Maybe they don't think that you're

gonna reciprocate the feeling.

750

: 00:29:17

Like I would say it's pretty

much all the same reasons.

751

: 00:29:18

Fear all the same reasons that a woman

wouldn't like want to make the first

752

: 00:29:22

move is like the same reasons a guy

doesn't want to make the first move.

753

: 00:29:24

Like it's just.

754

: 00:29:25

Fear.

755

: 00:29:27

So fear of rejection.

756

: 00:29:28

Yeah.

757

: 00:29:29

Oh, let's see.

758

: 00:29:30

Let's see.

759

: 00:29:31

I feel so discouraged

finding a Catholic community.

760

: 00:29:34

Any advice?

761

: 00:29:35

The advice is created.

762

: 00:29:37

Like you can look all you want,

but if there isn't one, then you

763

: 00:29:40

just gotta be the one to create it.

764

: 00:29:41

Sorry.

765

: 00:29:42

Like That's so true.

766

: 00:29:44

But like you just, some people

have to be the ones to create it.

767

: 00:29:46

And Mar and I have learned this So true.

768

: 00:29:48

It's like we would sit around and

wait for invitations and wait for

769

: 00:29:50

invitations and they don't come.

770

: 00:29:51

And so then we just had to

be the ones to invite people.

771

: 00:29:54

We would have to create the community.

772

: 00:29:55

Yep.

773

: 00:29:55

Like literally within our first

year of moving to Colorado,

774

: 00:29:58

we started a marriage group.

775

: 00:30:00

We, I started a bible study and we

started hosting monthly dinners.

776

: 00:30:06

That was in our first

third year living there.

777

: 00:30:10

Yeah.

778

: 00:30:10

And yeah, but like we extended

a lot of invitations in between.

779

: 00:30:14

Yeah.

780

: 00:30:14

And we kind of just stopped

waiting for invitations to come.

781

: 00:30:17

Yeah.

782

: 00:30:18

Went out.

783

: 00:30:18

Yeah.

784

: 00:30:18

Stopped and found the people that

we connected with here and there,

785

: 00:30:22

and then brought them together.

786

: 00:30:23

So like all the girls in my

Bible study didn't actually

787

: 00:30:26

have a relationship beforehand.

788

: 00:30:28

Maybe some like knew of each other, maybe.

789

: 00:30:30

Some were friends, but actually like most

of them didn't have a relationship with

790

: 00:30:34

each other and certainly not as a group.

791

: 00:30:36

But I had just connected with them

over the course of like a year, year

792

: 00:30:40

and a half individually, and I made an

invitation to bring 'em all together.

793

: 00:30:44

Yeah, these are all my favorite people.

794

: 00:30:45

Let's just bring 'em all together.

795

: 00:30:46

And now they're all friends and now they

like do stuff together, which is fine.

796

: 00:30:49

Yeah.

797

: 00:30:50

Yeah.

798

: 00:30:51

So it's hard.

799

: 00:30:52

But yeah, you can't just wait

for things to come to you.

800

: 00:30:55

You have to go make the thing happen.

801

: 00:30:57

Um.

802

: 00:30:59

And yeah, I don't know

what else I was gonna say.

803

: 00:31:02

I mean, but also like check

with your parish if there's

804

: 00:31:04

some sort of young adult group.

805

: 00:31:06

Oh, of course.

806

: 00:31:06

Yeah.

807

: 00:31:06

And really it just starts with

one person and it just takes time.

808

: 00:31:09

You find one friend, they are bound

to have another friend that could

809

: 00:31:12

fit in the group, and then they're

bound to have another friend.

810

: 00:31:14

And so it's just kind of

slowly meeting mutuals.

811

: 00:31:16

You just have to put yourself out there

and be willing to invite yourself to

812

: 00:31:20

things and invite other people to things.

813

: 00:31:22

Yeah.

814

: 00:31:22

Okay.

815

: 00:31:23

An inspiring entrepreneur here.

816

: 00:31:25

What is your plan with running

a business and having kids?

817

: 00:31:28

Great question.

818

: 00:31:30

Um, we're, well, we're lucky

because we did it together.

819

: 00:31:33

Yeah.

820

: 00:31:34

Yeah.

821

: 00:31:34

We're gonna have an awesome setup I think.

822

: 00:31:38

I think so.

823

: 00:31:38

And I hope, um, 'cause

we're both gonna be at home.

824

: 00:31:41

Mm-hmm.

825

: 00:31:41

So we're both going to be.

826

: 00:31:43

Slightly available and flexible, but our

current plan, not even like experiencing

827

: 00:31:48

kids yet, so it obviously could shift, is

that I'm gonna go down to part-time work.

828

: 00:31:52

Trey will stay full-time.

829

: 00:31:53

Mm-hmm.

830

: 00:31:53

So I'm gonna be mostly with the kids.

831

: 00:31:56

Um, and in order for me to be able to

do part-time, we're likely going to hire

832

: 00:32:01

a nanny slash like family assistant.

833

: 00:32:04

Mm-hmm.

834

: 00:32:04

And so this person will probably

take the kids for a couple

835

: 00:32:08

hours, um, a few days a week.

836

: 00:32:10

And allow me to have some

time to work and then.

837

: 00:32:14

Also help with some home chores.

838

: 00:32:16

Honestly, like my goal would be for this

person to clean our kitchen and do the

839

: 00:32:20

dishes every morning after breakfast,

and then like prep the lunch for us

840

: 00:32:24

to be ready during lunchtime, spend a

couple hours with the kids, um, maybe

841

: 00:32:29

even do some errands, like mm-hmm.

842

: 00:32:31

Shipping returns or

groceries, stuff like that.

843

: 00:32:35

I literally think there is no shame

in getting help for household tasks

844

: 00:32:40

or day-to-day things, and I think

that a lot of people feel like.

845

: 00:32:43

Oh, that's really snobby of you to

like outsource your grocery shopping

846

: 00:32:47

or like have someone help you prep

lunch, like No, honestly, it's just, I

847

: 00:32:51

know what is it within my capabilities

where, what does my time allow me to

848

: 00:32:57

do and I rather spend the extra time.

849

: 00:33:01

That I have with my

kids than doing dishes.

850

: 00:33:04

Yep.

851

: 00:33:05

Um, and if we have the ability and means

to have a nanny come in and support with

852

: 00:33:09

some childcare inside the home so we don't

have to do daycare and then even, and so

853

: 00:33:14

that things, and so that like you're able

to work, which is providing the income.

854

: 00:33:19

Well, that's the only reason we were

getting it is so I'm able to work.

855

: 00:33:22

Exactly.

856

: 00:33:22

And for us, it's like we

own our own businesses.

857

: 00:33:25

Like I'm an integral

part of our businesses.

858

: 00:33:28

Right.

859

: 00:33:28

And I love what I do.

860

: 00:33:30

If I had a regular nine to five, I'd

probably quit and be a stay at home mom.

861

: 00:33:34

'cause I am dying to be a mom.

862

: 00:33:36

But like, because I absolutely love

what we do and I'm so passionate

863

: 00:33:39

about all of our businesses.

864

: 00:33:41

Like I love work, so I

hope to work part-time.

865

: 00:33:46

Mm-hmm.

866

: 00:33:46

And then mom the rest of the time,

um, mom, most time honestly, it is

867

: 00:33:52

like working just what, like a couple

hours a day on a few days a week.

868

: 00:33:56

And then mom Yeah.

869

: 00:33:57

Most of the time.

870

: 00:33:59

But obviously when kids come,

I'm, we'll see what happens.

871

: 00:34:02

It's gonna be like learning

to balance it all and Yep.

872

: 00:34:04

See what's working for our family.

873

: 00:34:06

But, and, and I will just say we've

been, and my parents are hopefully

874

: 00:34:09

moving to Colorado, hopefully.

875

: 00:34:10

Yep.

876

: 00:34:11

So I really, yeah, we'll have,

and my parents are near us and so

877

: 00:34:14

it'll be, we'll have a lot of help.

878

: 00:34:15

Yeah.

879

: 00:34:15

Um, the other thing too is we've

been very strategically running the

880

: 00:34:21

business and creating processes and

systems and people so that Mari can go.

881

: 00:34:27

Part-time.

882

: 00:34:28

Like we've known this for the,

for a while, like for a long

883

: 00:34:30

time that we've wanted her to go

part-time when we've had kids.

884

: 00:34:33

And you know, we haven't been blessed

or had kids yet, but we, it's allowed

885

: 00:34:38

us to have a little bit more time to

make the hiring decisions and to like

886

: 00:34:43

outsource the activities that need to be

outsourced or to create more processes

887

: 00:34:47

in the business so that it's possible.

888

: 00:34:50

So we've been planning

for this for a while.

889

: 00:34:52

Yeah.

890

: 00:34:52

Okay.

891

: 00:34:53

Last thing to end on is I feel

like a little fertility update.

892

: 00:34:56

Sure.

893

: 00:34:57

Um, so.

894

: 00:34:58

I've been working with my doctor for about

a year now and trying different things.

895

: 00:35:03

Um, well, the current

doctor for about a year.

896

: 00:35:05

Yeah.

897

: 00:35:05

My current doctor, I

switched doctors a year ago.

898

: 00:35:08

Mm-hmm.

899

: 00:35:08

Um, this is one of those things, and

you may or may not have noticed, I don't

900

: 00:35:11

share the details of the medical journey.

901

: 00:35:13

Like a lot of people go online and

they share exactly what they're.

902

: 00:35:16

Dealing with, and I think that is super

helpful for women who are going through

903

: 00:35:20

the same thing to kind of learn about it.

904

: 00:35:23

Right now, in this moment of our

journey, I don't share the medical

905

: 00:35:26

details of what we're doing and what

the results are and what we're finding.

906

: 00:35:30

Um, maybe I will in the future one

day, but I don't feel like that's where

907

: 00:35:34

the Lord is giving me peace right now.

908

: 00:35:35

So I'm not gonna share specific details

of what we're doing or finding, but.

909

: 00:35:40

I've been working with my doctor

in the, for the past year and, um,

910

: 00:35:44

I will share, like we were doing

some hormone work and like things

911

: 00:35:47

were improving, largely supporting

it with natural, um, diet stuff.

912

: 00:35:52

Biggest thing that I've seen make

a difference is cutting out as much

913

: 00:35:56

sugar as possible and bad carbs.

914

: 00:35:58

So do your research into that.

915

: 00:36:00

If, um, this is something you're

struggling with and ask your doctor

916

: 00:36:03

about it, but it's crazy, the impact.

917

: 00:36:07

Sugar and bad carbs has, and just your

diet has, like, it was pretty fast.

918

: 00:36:11

How quickly we're able to see the impact

results and the like benefits of cleaning

919

: 00:36:15

up the diet in a month and removing sugar.

920

: 00:36:17

Yeah.

921

: 00:36:18

So, um, yeah, I mean there's definitely

hope and our doctor has never said

922

: 00:36:22

that we're not able to have children.

923

: 00:36:24

Like she has a lot of hope for us and

there's more things that we can try.

924

: 00:36:28

Um, but we do have a podcast episode

coming up pretty soon where we're gonna

925

: 00:36:31

dive a little bit more into depth of, um.

926

: 00:36:35

Fertility updates that

we do wanna share about.

927

: 00:36:37

So that'll be coming soon.

928

: 00:36:39

And yeah, so stay tuned for that.

929

: 00:36:40

I'll leave you with that now.

930

: 00:36:42

Great.

931

: 00:36:43

I don't feel like we're gonna do an ever

be answers because this whole episode

932

: 00:36:46

was Yeah, I think that's ever be answers.

933

: 00:36:49

I think that's great.

934

: 00:36:50

So that's that.

935

: 00:36:51

And we'll catch everybody who's on

the Kingdom Club at the after party.

936

: 00:36:58

If you're watching, you can see the cute

little Kingdom Club hat that I have on.

937

: 00:37:01

So if you wanna see what that's

all about, join our Patreon.

938

: 00:37:05

You can click the link in

the show notes to join.

939

: 00:37:08

You get to see the video of every single

one of these episodes, and then join

940

: 00:37:13

the after party, which is where Trey

and I answer a couple more questions.

941

: 00:37:17

Just for our Kingdom Club listeners

and a monthly live bible study with

942

: 00:37:21

your, oh my gosh, Shirley Mari, right?

943

: 00:37:23

That's like the biggest thing,

the biggest selling point.

944

: 00:37:24

You get a monthly live Bible study that

I lead every month, and it's actually

945

: 00:37:28

so fun you guys like, and it's fun

because at this point it's a consistent

946

: 00:37:31

group of girls that are coming.

947

: 00:37:32

So we all kind of get to know each

other a little bit more and get

948

: 00:37:35

to hear about each other's lives.

949

: 00:37:36

We get to pray for each other.

950

: 00:37:38

Within the Bible study, we have

prayer partners, so every month

951

: 00:37:40

you get paired with another girl

and you can connect with her and.

952

: 00:37:44

Share your prayer

intentions for the month.

953

: 00:37:46

Um, and it's been awesome.

954

: 00:37:48

I just like love ministering

to you guys in real time.

955

: 00:37:51

So to everybody who is in the

Kingdom Club, thanks for supporting,

956

: 00:37:54

thanks for showing up, and I hope

to see so many more of you there.

957

: 00:37:58

Now that's all we got for now.

958

: 00:37:59

The sun is coming down and

yep, it's probably really

959

: 00:38:02

dark darkness right now, so.

960

: 00:38:04

All right, see ya.

961

: 00:38:05

Bye.

Share Episode

Shownotes

Transcripts

Follow

Links

Chapters

Video

More from YouTube