Join Laura and Xhafer, two internet strangers, as they get to know each other while making jokes about one of their favorite TV shows from their childhood, Babylon 5.

Laura and Xhafer have made it halfway through Crusade and take a little movie break to appreciate the iconic work of Gary Cole in the Y2K classic, Office Space.

Hello and welcome to Who Are You?

2

This is the Babylon 5 Watchcast

hosted by two former strangers,

3

now friends, who have gotten to

know each other while watching a

4

favorite show from their childhood.

5

Babylon 5.

6

I'm Trefer.

7

Laura: I'm Laura.

8

Xhafer: Am I slurring a little?

9

I feel like my tongue is

running a little slow.

10

Laura: It's that glass

of wine you've got there.

11

Xhafer: not the first.

12

Laura: There's your problem right there.

13

Xhafer: It's, it's the second, but the

first was an ice wine which is higher

14

proof and then I had a little port

and now I'm on some Chianti, but I

15

Laura: Wow, you're just

fancy as hell today.

16

Xhafer: I am clearing

bottles off of my countertop.

17

Like, I'm taking open bottles that have

been sitting here for a little bit before

18

they've been sitting here too long.

19

Laura: Yeah.

20

Xhafer: So it really is, I

was a fancy bitch last week.

21

Which is true, I was, for my birthday.

22

I was a

23

Laura: Happy birthday, by the

24

Xhafer: Thank you.

25

Yeah, um, so, I made fancy steaks and

drank wine and I found a bottle of cognac

26

that was bottled the year I was born.

27

Laura: Wow.

28

Xhafer: Yes, so, I busted into that.

29

I bought that, I saw that in

January and I bought it then.

30

I've been sitting on it

for eight months, so.

31

Laura: Hey, I learned something

interesting about the year

32

I was born today in class.

33

Microsoft went public as a public

company the same month that I was born.

34

Xhafer: Oh, well you should

have invested that month.

35

That would have been good for you.

36

Laura: Mm hmm.

37

Because there have been a lot

of stock splits since then.

38

Xhafer: Yeah, it's uh, today is the 30

year anniversary of Google going public.

39

Laura: Oh.

40

Yeah.

41

Yeah.

42

Xhafer: And you would have seen a 660,

43

was it 6, 600 or 660 percent

return on investment.

44

Laura: Yeah.

45

Xhafer: Yeah.

46

Laura: I believe that.

47

Hey, this is a cool

segue that I didn't plan.

48

Xhafer: Yeah, we're talking about stock

prices before we talk about office space.

49

Laura: Those good old IT stocks.

50

Xhafer: those IT stocks, I was

real excited to watch this.

51

I

52

think I talked, I think I

mentioned this in Vegas.

53

I have not 15 years.

54

Laura: Wow.

55

Okay.

56

Xhafer: And the last time I saw

this movie, was not an office worker

57

the last time I watched this movie.

58

Laura: Uh Huh.

59

Xhafer: Nor was I in IT.

60

So, I know what a TPS report is now.

61

I haven't had to do one

because they're dead.

62

We'll talk about that later.

63

Laura: Yeah, I'm, I can't wait.

64

Xhafer: you can.

65

They're boring.

66

It's terrible.

67

But yeah, it's, it offered an entirely

new perspective on it and it actually came

68

up organically at work earlier this week.

69

Laura: Oh,

70

Xhafer: else had made a reference to

the movie and I'm like, Oh, I just

71

rewatched that for the first time since

I've really been working in an office.

72

I haven't seen it in

over a decade, you know?

73

Laura: Uh Huh.

74

Xhafer: you know, some jokes were had

and we were encouraging another coworker.

75

It's like, you gotta go, you really

gotta make the time to go watch it.

76

Laura: Yeah, this movie, it is

amazing how many little phrases

77

or jokes or things come up just

being in an office all the time.

78

Really?

79

Xhafer: thought a full on third of this

movie was in a different movie, too.

80

I thought all, I had completely

forgotten about the entire Jennifer

81

Aniston, all of the restaurant stuff,

and I thought that was all in waiting.

82

Which is a Ryan Reynolds waiting, like,

waitstaff movie from a decade after this.

83

That I'm guessing didn't age well.

84

I haven't, I've also not

seen that in a decade.

85

I'm guessing that's not good

86

anymore.

87

Uh, I'd be willing to

88

Laura: that one.

89

Yeah.

90

Yeah.

91

Xhafer: maybe I'll make the time for it.

92

Anyways, Office Space.

93

Laura: yeah.

94

Office Space.

95

So, I was also really looking forward

to this movie because every time

96

I've seen it, I found it hysterical.

97

I wonder, Ja'far, do you think this is

a Gen X movie or a Millennials movie?

98

Xhafer: I think it crosses that boundary.

99

Laura: Yeah.

100

Xhafer: Because this movie

came out in the late 90s.

101

So it, it, it came out in a time frame

where Elder Millennials such as ourselves

102

would have needed a, I think, 99 you said?

103

Yeah, I was, so, not to out my age

entirely, but I was not able to

104

see a rated R movie at that time.

105

Laura: Same.

106

Yeah.

107

Xhafer: So, I don't think I would

have been able to, um, you know,

108

witness it firsthand, but I think

it was in the zeitgeist enough.

109

Where when it hit video and, you

know, friends would watch their,

110

their parents copy of it on probably

VHS, maybe DVD, um, that it kind of

111

made the rounds a year later or so

whenever the video release was, I don't

112

think I watched it like, I probably

watched it in high school sometime.

113

I probably 16.

114

Laura: I think it was college for me.

115

And, you know, we aren't old

enough to have actually worked,

116

like, with these computers.

117

Like, We've done wage work, like

maybe we did some school stuff with

118

these computers in this sort of

environment, but we weren't workers.

119

We weren't living the office space

life, and yet I know enough about

120

it that I find it hysterical.

121

Xhafer: Yes.

122

actually, I've, some, some recent

events in my life, in my current

123

workplace, my VP was a Y2K programmer.

124

Laura: Oh, okay.

125

Xhafer: And he, like, hearing

him talk about, like, the dredges

126

of code and everything, and

127

Laura: Huh.

128

Xhafer: it's, it's Not quite on

the level of hearing my grandpa's

129

World War II stories, but

they're spoken in the same voice.

130

Laura: Uh Huh.

131

Xhafer: You know, obviously they're

very different experiences, but

132

they, they, they resonate the same.

133

It, in an interesting way to me.

134

Laura: Yeah.

135

We're going to speak the same

way probably about COVID times.

136

Xhafer: I'm sure.

137

Yeah.

138

Laura: And we remember, like, Y2K.

139

We remember the whole

140

Xhafer: Y2K sticker on my laptop right

141

Laura: Yeah.

142

Xhafer: Cause I thought, I saw

one for sale and I thought it

143

was the funniest fucking thing.

144

So my, my like, Microsoft Surface Clearly

Modern Laptop has a Best Buy Don't Forget

145

to Turn Your Computer Off at Midnight to

Prevent the Apocalypse kind of sticker.

146

Laura: Uh Huh.

147

Xhafer: Like, came on every 1998.

148

Laura: Yeah.

149

It's, it's one of those things, like,

we weren't old enough to experience

150

any of the consequences or hullabaloo

around it, but we heard all about it.

151

Xhafer: Yeah, well, I mean, people thought

it was gonna be the end of the world.

152

They thought the nukes were gonna go off.

153

Um, which would be weird, because

that would imply that you had,

154

like, an auto launch for, like,

155

Laura: Right?

156

Xhafer: Oh, by the way, if it's

157

Laura: Right.

158

That's absolutely bonkers.

159

Xhafer: Like, just having a basic idea

of how technology works now, some of

160

the concerns people had are absolutely

mind boggling to me, because a lot

161

of stuff would have still worked,

because the computer doesn't care

162

that it's 1900 most of the time.

163

Laura: Right.

164

The computer has no feelings.

165

The computer's not like, oh no,

there's no cars anymore or something.

166

Computer doesn't care.

167

Xhafer: I mean, what would

have been messy is any kind of

168

transactional based system of accrual.

169

Like, banks totally

would have gotten fucked.

170

Like, banks were the thing to worry about.

171

Because if banks had a bunch of stuff

in their software for like, okay,

172

well, this is a pre planned transaction

and it posts this day, that type of

173

software, the type of software that

handles that when it thinks it's

174

1900 is going to empty your account.

175

Laura: Yeah.

176

Xhafer: none of the transactions

will have posted yet.

177

I mean, it's a simple fix,

but it's still a problem.

178

Laura: Yeah.

179

As uh, I've, been hearing about some

of these FinTech apps, there's one

180

that recently, like, I don't know

exactly the Yotta, if you Google it.

181

And they basically had something go wrong

with one of their systems, and they're not

182

sure what banks everybody's money is at.

183

Xhafer: Oh, good.

184

Laura: Yeah, yeah, it's pretty crazy.

185

Xhafer: Yeah.

186

Laura: So, watch your fintechs.

187

Xhafer: All right.

188

Well, we should probably Oh, no, no, no.

189

I had no segue.

190

You had a segue.

191

Take it.

192

Laura: speaking of watching your techs,

maybe we should also watch our Initechs.

193

Xhafer: Yeah, I Oh, shit.

194

I bought an Inateck mug for this

recording, and then I forgot about

195

it because I've been drinking wine.

196

Laura: yeah, go pour your

wine into the Initech mug.

197

I need to see it.

198

Xhafer: I've been taking

it to work, actually.

199

Laura: Uh Huh.

200

Xhafer: I've had three people comment

on it, and all of them thought it

201

was hilarious, and I think anyone

who would be upset about it isn't

202

gonna get the reference, so.

203

Laura: Exactly,

204

Xhafer: Okay, hold on, I bought

that, I'm gonna go grab that mug real

205

Laura: Yeah, sure.

206

Do do do do do do do do do do do do do

do do do do do do do do do do do do do.

207

Xhafer: It's like the

exact Bill Lumberg mug.

208

Laura: Uh Huh.

209

Yeah.

210

You doing your best Lumberg face?

211

Xhafer: Mm hmm.

212

Laura: Hey, speaking of Lumberg, so

obviously that's Gary Cole, right?

213

That's our guy.

214

That's our Gideon.

215

Um, so if this was filmed, or

216

what's our Crusade dates again?

217

Xhafer: 99.

218

So this would have been

right around the same time.

219

Laura: Mm hmm.

220

Xhafer: didn't find anything that

told me the explicit order, but

221

I also didn't search that hard.

222

Laura: Yeah.

223

Xhafer: I gave it a very cursory like,

oh, I wonder how the, oh, no, it wasn't

224

like he had to like leave filming

crusade to make this movie or something.

225

Laura: Right.

226

Right.

227

Right.

228

Xhafer: I did read some stuff

about auditioning for this movie.

229

Laura: Oh yeah, tell me.

230

Xhafer: Um, well, I mean, one,

that there are like a billion

231

famous people in this movie.

232

Laura: There's a lot

of faces I recognized.

233

I can't say I got everybody's names, but.

234

Xhafer: Yeah.

235

This was, this was a big

movie for a lot of people.

236

Um, and the actor who plays Milton,

um, I'm, I'm pausing for Ben to

237

scream his name at me right now.

238

Laura: Hmm.

239

Xhafer: believe I remember reading that

he had originally auditioned for Lumberg.

240

And then he read for Milton and he

brought such a uniqueness to the

241

character that they just basically

let him run with it entirely.

242

Laura: Uh Huh.

243

I mean, he's perfect.

244

I cannot picture Milton any other way.

245

I guess Milton is based on a cartoon?

246

Xhafer: That makes sense, because this is

from the guy who did Beavis and Butthead.

247

Laura: Yeah.

248

Xhafer: And

249

Laura: I noticed that too.

250

Xhafer: but that was during slash after.

251

yeah.

252

So yeah, Gary Cole came in and

auditioned and they loved him for it.

253

Uh, he is very funny in this role.

254

Laura: He is hysterical and he looks

so different from Captain Gideon.

255

Xhafer: They shoehorned Jennifer

Aniston because they wanted someone

256

with a name attached to this picture.

257

Laura: she seems like

she's having a lot of fun.

258

Xhafer: Yeah.

259

Laura: I sure hope anyway.

260

Xhafer: So, this movie.

261

We open on a traffic jam.

262

This is exactly leave for work at 6.

263

45 in the morning.

264

Yeah.

265

Laura: those vibes here now

that I'm a real commuter.

266

Xhafer: Yeah.

267

I can leave at 6.

268

45 and be at work at 7.

269

05.

270

Or I can leave at 7 and be at work at 7.

271

45.

272

Those are my options.

273

And it's just like, anytime

in that gap, it's a crapshoot.

274

So, I get it, but I just uh, I

don't know, I feel, I feel a certain

275

kinship with the changing lanes and

then the other lanes going, but you

276

have to, you can't be that driver.

277

You have to commit to a lane and

stick in that lane and just trust

278

that it's going to get you there.

279

Laura: It's gonna make it worse.

280

Xhafer: Yeah.

281

But can we just have a moment of

silence, a moment of respect for everyone

282

who had to commute before podcasts?

283

Can you

284

Laura: right?

285

Xhafer: I mean, I did.

286

I'm sure you did too.

287

You had drives for work before

podcasts were a thing, really.

288

Laura: Yeah,

289

Xhafer: very least before it was

easy to listen to them in a car.

290

Laura: I know, I was not a radio person.

291

I did not like any of the radio stuff

and a lot of it was the commercials.

292

Didn't like that.

293

So I would just play like the same

CD over and over and over again.

294

Xhafer: Yeah.

295

I had a commute to high school.

296

Like I had, my high school was like

eight miles away from where I lived.

297

It was like a good 20, 25 minute drive.

298

Laura: Yeah, mine was

about 25 on the highway.

299

Xhafer: which I feel bitter about

because there are two high schools

300

closer to where I grew up than the

high school I got to go to because

301

we lived on the edge of the district.

302

Laura: Yeah.

303

Xhafer: There was a high school

a mile and a half away that

304

I was not eligible to attend.

305

Uh,

306

Laura: Oklahoma problems in that

there were two high schools in the

307

county and the one that was close

to me, Was not good and had like

308

20 students in their graduating

class and like no extracurriculars.

309

So

310

Xhafer: my, my graduating

311

Laura: Yeah, no, mine was less than 300

312

Xhafer: Wow.

313

It's always, I don't know, like, I

have had people, like, I've, I've,

314

I have run into people from high

school, although it would be more

315

appropriate to say people from high

school have run into me, I just did not.

316

And I always feel terrible about it, um,

but the first thing I did when I got to

317

college was try and drink high school

away, and I did a very good job of that.

318

So,

319

it's just, it's sorry everyone.

320

Laura: I I didn't do that and when

I went home for my 10 year reunion I

321

was like people were like, hi Laura.

322

How are you?

323

And I was like God, I

don't remember your name

324

Xhafer: This is why you put name tags on.

325

That's what every I've

never been to a reunion.

326

My high school hasn't had one.

327

My graduating class never had.

328

I should have had my 20

year reunion this year.

329

Laura: Wow

330

Xhafer: And nothing.

331

Laura: mine is coming up.

332

Xhafer: Or maybe they just

didn't invite me, which, fair.

333

Laura: Anyway, we were

going to talk about a movie.

334

Xhafer: yeah, we're

talking about office space.

335

We're going to go on a bunch of tangents.

336

That's just, It's just,

we're just catching up.

337

This is the first, we haven't

recorded since we were in Vegas.

338

Laura: Yeah, that's right, because

339

I've recorded with the

cool girls, but not you.

340

Xhafer: Cause you had your other

stuff, you had your trip to DC, um,

341

and all kinds of other things going on.

342

So it's just been, we haven't

been able to make it happen.

343

All of our runway we built.

344

Gone.

345

Laura: In the blink of an eye.

346

Xhafer: People are talking about

this episode and looking forward

347

to it in the Discord today.

348

And I'm just all like, oh god,

we haven't even recorded it yet.

349

But,

350

Laura: Hey, you tried.

351

You tried to bump it up yesterday,

but I was not in the space.

352

Xhafer: It's fine.

353

It's fine.

354

Michael is listening

to some Scarface here.

355

That's the, that's the, rap.

356

know.

357

This is actually very appropriate

because they are in Texas.

358

This takes place in Texas.

359

Laura: Oh, does it?

360

Okay, I didn't catch that.

361

Xhafer: Scarface is a local

rapper from the Austin area.

362

So it is early southern, it is,

so there's like a couple different

363

schools of southern rap and this,

this is the earliest of one of them.

364

So that's cool.

365

I can appreciate that.

366

Laura: Yeah.

367

Michael Bolton looks

super cool doing this.

368

Yeah.

369

Xhafer: I'm not an angry person.

370

I don't find anger does

me much good in the world.

371

But when I'm driving, it's so easy

to just get flippant at someone

372

being, just disregarding theirs and

others safety while you're driving

373

a two ton machine that can go five

times faster than any human can run.

374

Laura: Yeah.

375

I try to limit myself to just the

words and not make any gestures

376

considering the state of the world today.

377

Xhafer: I haven't thrown anything.

378

Laura: Yeah.

379

Xhafer: That's, that's

about all I can say.

380

Laura: No, yesterday on uh, Getting

off of I 40, I saw someone legit

381

come halfway out of their window

to yell at the car next to them.

382

So, like,

383

yeah, ah,

384

Xhafer: half like, like,

wear out on my torso, like.

385

Laura: down, down, down, pretty

much to your waist, yeah,

386

like,

387

Xhafer: that's, that's impressive.

388

That's a level of limber I aspire to.

389

I could not do that in my car.

390

That would be painful for me.

391

Laura: Yeah, no, no level of anger could

actually propel me to those motions.

392

I'd

393

Xhafer: like up to here and

just be all like, ow, my back!

394

Laura: be like, never mind!

395

Xhafer: I'm still mad though!

396

Laura: Yeah,

397

so we've, we've, been introduced

to Peter and Samir and Michael

398

Bolton, our kind of three amigos

399

Xhafer: Yeah.

400

Did you catch Lumberg has that

custom plate on his Porsche?

401

Letting everyone know

that it's His Porsche.

402

Laura: I found a Porsche for this man a

little bit unbelievable, but I don't know.

403

Xhafer: He is a VP, as we

see on his reserved parking.

404

Laura: Yeah.

405

Yeah.

406

He just doesn't have the wardrobe for

VP to me, but this is the nineties.

407

So fair enough.

408

Xhafer: Peter reluctantly

enters the building.

409

And uh, working in an office before noise

canceling headphones must have been hell.

410

Laura: Oh my gosh, yes.

411

So much ambient, like, cubicle crap,

and the, the soundtrack of Accounts

412

Payable, whatever her name is,

413

speaking.

414

Xhafer: Yeah.

415

Yes, her job is about to be

replaced by a call directory.

416

Laura: Mm

417

Xhafer: as it stands, I have

this actually same exact pair.

418

I have a second pair of these exact

headphones at work, and these are

419

nice noise canceling headphones, and I

still hear people around me on meetings

420

all the fucking time, and I hate it.

421

So.

422

It's like someone whose job is,

like, getting deep into spreadsheets

423

and writing code and stuff.

424

Laura: Uh Huh.

425

Xhafer: Just hearing ambient noise like

that while I'm trying to write giant

426

Excel formulas or whatever I have to do

at this particular moment is just, ugh.

427

Mm

428

Laura: from sole office to now sharing

a one room with six other PhD students.

429

I'm doing a lot of the white

noise, like Thunderstorm was today.

430

I've had Coffee Shop on, just

something where I don't have

431

to hear people around me.

432

Xhafer: Default to, like,

ambient galaxy static.

433

Like, astral sounds.

434

Laura: huh.

435

Xhafer: I don't know if that's just

because it's not even like it's

436

in Star Trek, but I, I, I will a

hundred percent blame Star Trek and

437

their use of like ambient warp drive

438

Laura: Yeah.

439

That's an option on one of my, on my app.

440

It's a spaceship engine room.

441

It's the warp drive.

442

It's the warp core.

443

Xhafer: Nice.

444

Yeah.

445

Laura: warp core sounds.

446

Xhafer: So people are coming up here to

Peter talking about TPS cover sheets.

447

They're so important.

448

They're, they're actually, the

cover sheets are actually more

449

important than the report itself.

450

Laura: Apparently, because

we have, what, three people?

451

At

452

least.

453

Do tell

454

Xhafer: TPS reports, these

fuckers, these fuckers are dead.

455

Um, for the most part, this is a

test procedure specification report.

456

Um, so this is in

software development and.

457

This did, you use these one of two ways.

458

You either would go through and use

it to detail how you tested code

459

to make sure that it runs properly.

460

So everything you tried to do to break

it, or this was a request form for a

461

computer to test your code on, because it

used to be, you would code on a computer

462

and then you would need a second computer

to run it on because if your code killed

463

the computer, you would lose everything.

464

Laura: Oh, that sounds like a design flaw.

465

Xhafer: Well, back before,

you know, electronic mail was

466

even around this was an issue.

467

You didn't have virtualization.

468

Nowadays, I'm literally

on my laptop right now.

469

I started, I volunteered to join a dev

project for a fan thing for Star Wars

470

Unlimited, the card game that I play.

471

I have five different computers

running on my laptop right now.

472

Laura: Nice.

473

Xhafer: Doing stuff for

that test environment.

474

Um, and that's just my personal test

environment that only lives on my laptop.

475

All of the other devs have at least

one, if not multiple of those set up.

476

Laura: Yeah.

477

That makes sense.

478

Xhafer: And you can just do that now.

479

It's literally, I clicked like six

buttons and I spun up the four different

480

parts of the computer system, like the

SQL server that feeds the database,

481

all the web server, all that stuff.

482

All in, in minutes, instead of having

all separate computers that if any

483

of them died, the entire thing fails.

484

So TPS reports.

485

Fucking dead.

486

Rest in piss.

487

Laura: I love how much

paper is everywhere.

488

Like we've got computers, but we still

need to print all this stuff off.

489

I remember those days, sort of.

490

Xhafer: When I worked

at GM it was like that.

491

And that was seven years ago.

492

Laura: Yeah.

493

Xhafer: Everything I did on the

computer had to be printed and filed.

494

Laura: Yeah.

495

Mm hmm.

496

The bank had a little bit of

that, but I tried to pull some of

497

that stuff away when I started.

498

There was some of it I never got people to

let go of, but you do what you can, right?

499

Xhafer: Yeah.

500

Memos get delivered by hand by

someone's job who is about to be

501

replaced by that aforementioned email.

502

Laura: Lots of jobs about

to go away in this movie.

503

Xhafer: Yeah.

504

They go to Tchotchkes for

lunch at like 10am on Monday.

505

They

506

wonder if they're still

going to be doing this at 50.

507

And I can say yes, the IBM AS400s

that we see them programming for

508

in the background are all still

up and running all over the world.

509

Laura: Yeah.

510

Yeah.

511

I believe it.

512

Mm hmm.

513

Xhafer: But two of their jobs are

probably replaced by GitHub by now.

514

Laura: Sure.

515

Yeah.

516

Xhafer: Uh, And we see Jennifer Aniston.

517

We get an eating disorder

joke, which is still not funny.

518

Laura: Yeah.

519

There's always one or two

in these movies, right?

520

Of bad looks that we've since reassessed.

521

Xhafer: Gotta have a little A little

something to be disappointed in to remind

522

us that this takes place in the past.

523

Otherwise, have we even

grown as a society?

524

Laura: Right.

525

I was wondering if this movie, like, if I

feel about this movie the way that boomers

526

feel about Animal House you know, cause

that's one of the movies you hear all the

527

time, they're like, oh, I love that movie.

528

I was

529

like, man,

530

do I

531

Xhafer: it was one of my dad's favorites.

532

100%.

533

Laura: Like,

534

Xhafer: hmm.

535

Mm hmm.

536

When was the last time

you watched Animal House?

537

Laura: I've only watched it once, and

I was floored at how not good it was.

538

It's like,

539

this?

540

Xhafer: I kind of wonder if as I get

older I might give a fuck less about it.

541

I, I don't know.

542

It's just like, it's not funny now.

543

And so like my brain's just all like,

okay, well, I was supposed to get

544

more conservative as I get older.

545

What if instead of that, I just grow to

appreciate animal house for some reason.

546

Is that worse?

547

Laura: I don't think

you're in danger there.

548

I wonder if my son is gonna feel

the way about this movie that

549

we're feeling about Animal House.

550

If he's gonna be

551

Xhafer: There'll be the

eating disorder joke.

552

Can y'all Throw down his 4D cell phone

and take off his virtual reality goggles.

553

Be real upset about it in 30 years.

554

However, they're doing TV then.

555

We head back to the office as

Tom, a project manager, gets

556

some memos about downsizing.

557

Laura: Oh yeah, this is our Richard Reel.

558

That guy about town.

559

Xhafer: Yep.

560

Some things never change.

561

This didn't hit me

personally for any reason.

562

head home, and we meet Lawrence.

563

Who is

564

Laura: is the best, though.

565

Mm

566

Xhafer: Hilarious.

567

Uh, unhinged 90's line cook energy.

568

Is uh, was Beth's term

100 percent correct?

569

Laura: Yeah, the mustache, the

mullet, like, it's all there.

570

It's, it's real good.

571

I love that Lawrence can hear

everything through his wall and

572

is just super chill about it.

573

Xhafer: super thin apartment walls.

574

Laura: Yeah, yeah.

575

Invites himself over whenever, like,

I would love having a roommate like

576

there, I guess he's not a roommate.

577

I would love having a neighbor like this.

578

I'd be like, all right, let's chill.

579

Xhafer: Yeah.

580

I mean, that's what it was.

581

I used to live two blocks

from Ben and Glory Ann.

582

Laura: Yeah.

583

Xhafer: And it

584

Laura: That'd be fun, Hangs.

585

Xhafer: It was fun hangs.

586

It was great.

587

It was all like, oh shit, I

need to go do a thing, can you

588

come watch Henry for a minute?

589

Oh shit I'm gonna be late at this

thing, can you go let Puff outside?

590

Like, besides the utility of it,

just like, having such a casual layer

591

of access to your best friends was

enormously enriching in my life.

592

Laura: that's the dream.

593

Xhafer: It was great.

594

Laura: Lawrence doesn't think that Peter's

working out with his girlfriend, Anne.

595

That's kind of a, a catalyst

for a lot of this movie.

596

Xhafer: Yeah, um, Anne's

probably cheating on him.

597

It's come up twice already

598

Laura: It's everyone's opinion.

599

Yeah.

600

Xhafer: it's like, I think

she's cheating on you, dude.

601

To the point where it's

like, how does everyone know?

602

Like,

603

Laura: Uh Huh.

604

Xhafer: I, I, if she was around for

another five minutes of this movie,

605

I might have more questions about her

interactions with literally anybody else.

606

I don't know.

607

Laura: Sure,

608

Xhafer: But we don't get to see those.

609

Laura: No, it's almost

more fun as a mystery.

610

Xhafer: Yeah.

611

Laura: But yeah, she's pestering Peter

to go to hypnotherapy for some reason.

612

I don't know how that's supposed to

help them work on their problems, but

613

Xhafer: Yeah.

614

She's really into it

though, but uh, We'll see.

615

Another question that's come up is, What

would you do if you had a million dollars?

616

Lawrence, with the iconic answer,

Two chicks at the same time.

617

The man

618

knows what he wants.

619

Laura: Mm hmm.

620

He's a simple man.

621

Xhafer: Yeah.

622

Laura: Isn't that everyone's dream?

623

That's

624

Xhafer: all like, he's all like, I think

like you could probably like, he's all

625

like, no, looking at me, like the only

chicks who are going to sleep with me

626

are going to be interested in my money.

627

So I'm going to need the million dollars.

628

And it's just all like, well, that's

disparaging, but self aware, I suppose.

629

Laura: I need to know now

how much a million dollars

630

in 1999 would be worth today.

631

And, friends, it is 1.

632

8 million dollars.

633

So, yeah, I'm pretty sure with almost

two million dollars you can probably

634

get two chicks at the same time, right?

635

Yeah.

636

Xhafer: I don't know this for certain.

637

is, this is me guessing.

638

But there are places in the United

States where prostitution is legal.

639

Laura: sex work is work, yeah.

640

Xhafer: And I don't know how

much it would cost, but I have

641

to imagine it's less than 1.

642

8 million dollars.

643

Laura: Yeah,

644

Xhafer: That seems

prohibitively expensive.

645

Yeah,

646

Laura: figure it out, I

have faith in that mustache.

647

Xhafer: Hypnotherapy, we

get introduced to Bob first.

648

Laura: Oh, we do, the bobs?

649

Xhafer: We get Bob one, and

then we get Bob two later.

650

Laura: Okay.

651

Okay.

652

Xhafer: Yes, we intro Bob,

the consultant, this McKinley

653

motherfucker, this Deloitte do little.

654

Well, I have some feelings

about consultants.

655

Laura: Oh, was that

part of your experience?

656

Xhafer: No,

657

Laura: Oh, okay.

658

Okay.

659

Xhafer: No, my effective brother

in law worked in consulting.

660

and so I've heard stories from him

about the industry and just also,

661

like, the kinds of things that go down.

662

And I've just, I've been around

enough people who have worked

663

or experienced it to just have a

very visceral Kind of reaction.

664

You know, actually kind of was part

of my experience, not directly, but

665

the people that became in charge

of senior leadership were all these

666

type of people from these places.

667

Laura: Yeah.

668

Yeah.

669

I recently heard about somebody becoming a

consultant, like, straight out of college.

670

And I was like, how does,

how does that happen?

671

Cause I, I always thought like

for consulting, you needed

672

to have like an experience.

673

Xhafer: you don't,

674

Laura: Apparently not.

675

Xhafer: is uh, you, you need, you need to

be able to make PowerPoint presentations

676

when you're a consultant, that's

677

Laura: Yeah, apparently.

678

Xhafer: that convince people to fire

people so that they can have more money.

679

Laura: Yeah.

680

And that's the, that's the

like implication here when

681

we meet the first Bob.

682

I gotta say, like, with just general

Lumberg here at the beginning of the

683

movie, I was having real, like, I

was up in my feelings because I was

684

like, this is kinda how I felt like I

was as I was heading out of the bank.

685

Like my last couple of years, I

didn't feel good about my job anymore.

686

I felt like I was kind of a Lumberg.

687

Xhafer: I'm sure you are not a Lumberg.

688

Laura: Yeah, I'm sure the

perception was different, right?

689

But internally I felt like

not the same person anymore.

690

Xhafer: No, no, no.

691

I, this is very easy to disprove, Laura.

692

Lumberg is solely self motivated

693

Laura: Mm, okay.

694

Xhafer: and does not give a shit

about anyone who reports to him.

695

Laura: Yeah, yeah, I still

had my give a shit, I think.

696

Xhafer: Yeah, you could not give a

shit about the company and give a

697

shit about the people who work there.

698

And you might feel like you're just

pushing paper because you are because

699

you don't give a shit about the company.

700

But as a manager, it's not your

job to give a sh I mean, depending

701

on your level of management.

702

It's, it's executives job to

give a shit about the company.

703

It's like if you're a frontline

manager, your job is to keep the

704

people that work for you invested

and keep the wheels moving.

705

Much more so than anything else.

706

Laura: Yeah, yeah, sometimes that

gets real hard, like after COVID.

707

Xhafer: Yeah.

708

Laura: so I guess I'm, I'm not a

Lumberg now, I'm a student again.

709

So, here we go.

710

Xhafer: We go over to Milton real quick

who's on his fourth desk move of the year.

711

he's going to burn the place down if they

take a staple or he avows at this point.

712

Yeah,

713

Laura: That was my indulgence for

myself when I was an accounting

714

staff and I had the power of

placing orders from Office Depot.

715

I ordered myself a Milton stapler.

716

Xhafer: I read swing line.

717

Do you think this movie

kept them in business?

718

Laura: There had to have been,

like, a bump from this movie, right?

719

Xhafer: Probably not even directly

after this movie, but a very slow

720

creep over the next ten years.

721

Um, I mean, when I bought this

722

Laura: stream of red

723

Xhafer: the, Oh, do you want to

purchase a Red Swingline stapler

724

with this mug that you're purchasing?

725

They know.

726

Bezos knows.

727

Laura: Yeah, there's synergy there.

728

Xhafer: Yeah.

729

Peter tries to get out early here

in what feels like a recreation

730

of a scene from The Matrix.

731

But is asked to come

in Saturday and Sunday.

732

Laura: Just, I guess this is

a thing that happens, right?

733

Happened mostly, but

734

Xhafer: I mean, I've had to work a

weekend since I started my new job.

735

But that was also with the expectation

of getting an extra day off later.

736

Laura: Did you have to do it in the

office or did you do it from home?

737

Xhafer: Oh, I did it from home.

738

And it was, it was only a couple

hours, it wasn't a full day.

739

Um, but also like, that's

the nature of my dev work.

740

Like, the things that I was doing were

not things that required, no one would

741

have been at the office if I had gone in.

742

Laura: Yeah.

743

Xhafer: It was, it was, my team

had a code push to make deadline.

744

Like,

745

Laura: It would be absolutely bonkers

to me today for people to be like, you

746

need to come in the office on Saturday.

747

Like, okay, I could see we're having

a deadline and we need to do work

748

on Saturday, but no one should be

having to be in an office anymore.

749

Xhafer: for sure.

750

Laura: huh.

751

Xhafer: Hypnotherapist on Friday night.

752

Peter says some of the most depressing

shit I and this therapist have ever heard.

753

Every day is successively

the worst day of his life.

754

It's just a little bit

worse every single day.

755

This is a TikTok meme just went

around that was this, like, guy who

756

gets jobbed from the devil being

a torturer because he uses, like,

757

a wish to put this upon his enemy.

758

Can't be great.

759

Laura: is uh, group hypnotherapy, too.

760

So he gets to say this in

front of, like, strangers.

761

And poor Ann, actually, like, every

day of his life is the worst day.

762

How does that make you feel as a partner?

763

Yeah.

764

Yeah.

765

I

766

Xhafer: to be hypnotized so he just thinks

he's fishing instead of him being at work.

767

Laura: mean, that's a hobby people have.

768

Xhafer: Yeah, the hypnotherapist submerges

Peter in his own psyche and just as

769

he finishes dies of a heart attack.

770

Laura: Yeah, the most

dramatic heart attack.

771

Like, he is sweating, he is visibly

uncomfortable, and no one says anything.

772

Xhafer: Starts reaching for his chest.

773

Yeah.

774

Yep, he's just uh, the

hypnotherapist dies in front of him.

775

Not a care to be had in the world for

776

Laura: Yeah, Peter is bliss out.

777

Xhafer: He sleeps through the day.

778

Lumberg left 17 messages on his machine.

779

Anne calls him to break up with

him for being hypnotized and also

780

confirming everyone's suspicion

that she's been cheating on him.

781

What a shitty thing to say in spite.

782

Like, how terrible of a fucking person.

783

Do you have to be to be, I'm breaking

up with you because you embarrassed

784

me, also I've been cheating on you.

785

Laura: Yeah, and you embarrassed me

for a thing that I pushed you into.

786

Xhafer: Yeah.

787

Wasn't even a thing you wanted to

do, and I was well aware of that.

788

And also, you were hypnotized.

789

Laura: Yeah, yeah.

790

Good thing Peter doesn't give a shit.

791

Xhafer: Yeah.

792

It's Monday and Peter

still hasn't gone to work.

793

Fuck em.

794

Instead goes to tchotchkes to

flirt with Jennifer Aniston.

795

No bits on tips.

796

Laura: Yeah, no bets on tips.

797

I'm, I'm still dubious, even

though it works out in this movie,

798

on asking a waitress out at all.

799

Xhafer: Yeah, I mean, there

is a, be it a minor, still an

800

existing power dynamic there.

801

It's shitty.

802

Laura: Mm hmm.

803

Xhafer: Like, your livelihood

depends on tips as a waiter

804

or waitress in this country.

805

Depending on where you

live and where you work.

806

There's been some places that have

been changing that, but Knowing that

807

that's your primary form of income?

808

Yeah, that's

809

That sucks.

810

Laura: I don't know in the times that I

waitressed that I would have ever been

811

comfortable, no matter how attractive

the person might have been, if they

812

were asking me out while I was at work.

813

Xhafer: Yeah.

814

Laura: Yeah.

815

Yeah.

816

So we find out that she's

got those pieces of flair.

817

Xhafer: Mmhmm.

818

Laura: Pieces of flair.

819

This is iconic as well.

820

One of

821

Xhafer: I also thought

this was from waiting.

822

Laura: Nope.

823

Nope.

824

Nope.

825

this is an allusion to TGI

Fridays at one time, right?

826

Xhafer: I would imagine so.

827

I think I've ate at a TGA

Fridays at some point in my life.

828

I'm sure I have.

829

Given the amount of traveling and small

towns I've been trapped in for a week,

830

I'm sure I've ate at a TGA Fridays.

831

If I was ever presented with a

road that had a TGA Fridays and an

832

Applebee's, I would pick the TGA Fridays.

833

Laura: yeah, as you should.

834

Xhafer: Yeah

835

Laura: are they still around?

836

Maybe in some iteration?

837

I don't

838

Xhafer: didn't didn't

Red Lobster just go out?

839

Laura: Yeah, they just went bankrupt.

840

They're gone.

841

They,

842

Xhafer: can't the fucking Olive Garden go?

843

That place is actual trash.

844

Laura: Flav is trying to save Red Lobster,

apparently, according to the internet, so

845

Xhafer: Cool, he failed with his

chicken franchise, so maybe buying

846

Red Lobster will turn out differently?

847

Laura: Maybe.

848

Xhafer: I just don't know why you'd look

to someone with a failed business and

849

think we should give them another chance.

850

You know, like, if someone failed

with, like, I don't know, what's

851

a surefire business, casinos?

852

And, you know, like, real estate?

853

And managed to fuck that

up a bunch, multiple times?

854

You know, maybe even at, like,

a university or something?

855

And then you're all like, well,

You're good at business though, right?

856

We should give you a TV show

or maybe some kind of platform.

857

I don't know.

858

I just don't understand it.

859

Laura: I mean, Flava Flav had two

successful seasons of his dating show,

860

so that's probably his qualifications

861

Xhafer: yes.

862

The Flavor of Love.

863

Laura: hmm.

864

Did you ever watch The Flavor of Love?

865

Xhafer: No.

866

Laura: I watched one season in college,

and it didn't make me any smarter.

867

It's been 50 minutes, Ja'far, and we

are like 20 minutes in this movie.

868

Xhafer: Look, I've got

five pages of notes left.

869

Laura: We did Army of Darkness

in 30 minutes and on office

870

space we cannot shut up.

871

Xhafer: So Tom is trying to defend

his job but failing under pressure.

872

He's right, engineers

are not people persons.

873

That's not what he should

be defending his job for.

874

He should be talking about

managing customer expectations

875

to save money on development or

upselling features to revenue.

876

That's what he should be talking about,

but he's not doing those things and

877

he's going to lose his job for it.

878

P.

879

S.

880

Discord, if you ever need

help with a resume, holler.

881

I'm good at that shit.

882

Laura: mm.

883

Good to know.

884

Xhafer: You can make any job sound great.

885

I

886

promise.

887

It is all about framing that

888

Laura: Exactly.

889

Yeah.

890

Presentation.

891

Style is everything.

892

Xhafer: Michael Bolton has to eat shit

to Bain and company of my existence uh,

893

about liking the pop star, Michael Bolton.

894

Laura: Oh, yes.

895

This, some, just the, the way

they've encapsulated office

896

behavior in this movie.

897

Just, chef's kiss.

898

Yeah,

899

Xhafer: I am old enough now

where no one has asked me.

900

If I like the movie

Aladdin because of my name.

901

That's, that's so far in the past

now where that hasn't happened

902

to me in a professional setting.

903

Laura: mm hmm.

904

Xhafer: And I'd really

like it to stay that way.

905

Laura: Just wait until there's

like a big reboot of that movie.

906

Xhafer: There was one.

907

There was the live action with

908

Laura: Yeah, I wouldn't call that big.

909

Xhafer: Okay, fair.

910

It was not successful, I believe,

911

but

912

Laura: that's where

913

Xhafer: know.

914

Joanna meets Peter at

Flickr's, which is not Chili's,

915

Laura: uh, huh.

916

Yes.

917

Xhafer: queso skillet, guys.

918

And she is impressed at how much

nicer this identical place to her

919

workplace is compared to her workplace.

920

Laura: This has got to

be the same set, right?

921

Like, we just moved a few things around?

922

Xhafer: Yes.

923

Uh, I think, I mean, it's

definitely the same set.

924

I think that's the joke, though.

925

Peter decides he's going to get rich by

inventing quiet quitting, and invites

926

her over for some Kung Fu and chill.

927

I

928

Laura: Yeah, He's,

929

Xhafer: Kung Fu holds up.

930

Laura: he's a visionary, like,

931

Xhafer: Yeah.

932

Laura: 30 years early, almost?

933

25,

934

right?

935

Xhafer: moves Milton's

desk and takes his stapler.

936

Peter grabs his phone book.

937

And decides to sit down

with the Deloitte Dolittles.

938

I did use it again!

939

Go ahead and take it out from earlier.

940

I'm sorry, Aaron.

941

And Peter just uh,

speaks the truth to them.

942

The unequivocal truth.

943

He steamrolls past Lumberg

on his way out after this.

944

Laura: Turns out the Bobs like truth.

945

Xhafer: Yeah.

946

He has eight bosses.

947

Laura: Yeah,

948

Xhafer: That's so many.

949

Laura: And they all jump down his

throat about his cover sheets.

950

Xhafer: Yeah, I have two

and a half, and that's mind

951

numbingly frustrating sometimes.

952

Laura: Oh yeah, like, you've got competing

priorities from people, like, I, I

953

really want a clear chain of command.

954

Yeah.

955

Yeah.

956

Uh,

957

Xhafer: Not the issue.

958

Laura: yeah,

959

Xhafer: the, my boss will ask me for

something and then his boss will be all

960

like, you need to drop everything and

do this, and neglect to tell my boss.

961

So when my boss is like, oh, where's

this, how's this thing going?

962

I'm all like, your boss came

and told me to work on this.

963

He's just like, motherfucker.

964

Laura: Yeah, yeah, too much, too

965

Xhafer: Uh,

966

Laura: they're eight,

eight like vertical bosses,

967

Xhafer: Oh, there's no way someone

eight stages up is that infested.

968

Laura: yeah, they gotta be eight like

969

Xhafer: So, if I had to guess.

970

Lumberg is like VP of projects, right?

971

So, I'm guessing he's got Lumberg.

972

He's got Lumberg's boss.

973

He's got the project manager.

974

The project manager's boss.

975

That's four.

976

Um, and then there's probably

accounting people, or bank

977

people, and then their bosses.

978

Laura: yeah.

979

Too much.

980

But the Bob's really uh, vibe

with that kind of honesty.

981

Xhafer: Mm hmm.

982

Laura: It's a little perplexing.

983

Xhafer: I mean, you are

identifying waste and

984

Laura: hmm.

985

Mm

986

Xhafer: which is what they actually

should be getting paid to be doing.

987

So, everyone's probably so nervous about

keeping their job they don't want to talk

988

shit about their terrible eight bosses.

989

Laura: Yeah.

990

Xhafer: Joanna gets talked to about

not wanting more pieces of flair.

991

Laura: Yeah.

992

Yeah.

993

Doing the minimum is not

enough at Tchotchkes.

994

Xhafer: And this is when uh, Bobston

Consulting Group review their interviews

995

and are letting people go left and right.

996

When they get to Peter The

Bobs are excited and Lumberg

997

disparages him immediately.

998

Laura: Uh Huh.

999

Xhafer: They're like, this guy's

management potential, all this stuff.

00:47:50,967 --> 00:47:53,527

And he's just like, yeah.

00:47:53,527 --> 00:48:00,667

And then the scene cuts to Peter

pulling into Lumberg's parking spot.

00:48:01,387 --> 00:48:04,227

And I noticed something that

I had never noticed before.

00:48:05,052 --> 00:48:05,562

Laura: What's that?

00:48:06,027 --> 00:48:08,247

Xhafer: Lumberg got

demoted after this meeting.

00:48:08,512 --> 00:48:08,552

Laura: Gasp!

00:48:10,122 --> 00:48:11,472

His sign changed?

00:48:11,657 --> 00:48:13,197

Xhafer: His sign changed.

00:48:13,197 --> 00:48:15,457

His title has been removed.

00:48:15,737 --> 00:48:17,937

He is no longer vice president.

00:48:19,337 --> 00:48:20,467

Division VP.

00:48:21,112 --> 00:48:21,252

Laura: Gasp.

00:48:22,542 --> 00:48:23,722

I didn't notice that.

00:48:25,237 --> 00:48:26,787

Xhafer: He still keeps his parking spot.

00:48:26,787 --> 00:48:27,127

Yeah.

00:48:27,877 --> 00:48:31,527

I had to like rewind and check at the

beginning of the movie again to be all

00:48:31,527 --> 00:48:33,627

like, was, am I remembering this right?

00:48:33,637 --> 00:48:34,787

And sure enough.

00:48:35,592 --> 00:48:37,102

Laura: I love that kind of psych gag.

00:48:37,677 --> 00:48:38,247

Xhafer: Yeah.

00:48:38,247 --> 00:48:39,307

Yeah.

00:48:39,307 --> 00:48:41,767

Lumberg parks in a handicap spot.

00:48:42,282 --> 00:48:44,322

Gets his bumper torn off for his trouble.

00:48:44,632 --> 00:48:45,042

Laura: Yeah.

00:48:45,542 --> 00:48:51,253

Xhafer: While Peter takes down the

stupid work motivation sign that Lumber

00:48:51,253 --> 00:48:53,223

get put up a couple of scenes before.

00:48:53,456 --> 00:48:53,906

Laura: Uh Huh.

00:48:54,516 --> 00:48:58,526

Xhafer: And then we get a montage

of Kung Fu and chill office,

00:48:58,546 --> 00:49:00,816

deconstruction and fishing.

00:49:00,816 --> 00:49:03,446

Man,

00:49:03,806 --> 00:49:04,776

Laura: right at our desk.

00:49:04,876 --> 00:49:05,276

Love it.

00:49:06,772 --> 00:49:08,152

Xhafer: like fuck this guy.

00:49:10,762 --> 00:49:14,182

Have you ever been in a crowded

office when someone microwaves fish?

00:49:14,447 --> 00:49:16,417

Laura: Can you imagine gutting that fish?

00:49:16,717 --> 00:49:17,027

Yeah.

00:49:17,217 --> 00:49:21,737

Well, theoretically, maybe because it's

fresher, like, it doesn't smell as much?

00:49:21,997 --> 00:49:22,417

Question mark?

00:49:23,267 --> 00:49:24,517

Xhafer: Have you gutted a fish?

00:49:24,817 --> 00:49:25,857

Laura: Oh, no.

00:49:25,897 --> 00:49:26,557

I have not.

00:49:26,557 --> 00:49:28,583

Yeah.

00:49:28,583 --> 00:49:31,012

Yeah.

00:49:31,012 --> 00:49:34,005

Yeah.

00:49:34,696 --> 00:49:42,116

Xhafer: fish in an office that

is inescapable, but not by much.

00:49:43,606 --> 00:49:46,616

It is, it is a quality all of its own.

00:49:47,389 --> 00:49:53,259

Lumberg goes to take out his frustrations

here on Peter only to find him impervious.

00:49:54,424 --> 00:49:56,694

So he takes it out on Milton instead.

00:49:57,520 --> 00:49:59,130

Laura: The little punching bag mountain.

00:49:59,885 --> 00:50:00,595

Xhafer: Mm hmm.

00:50:00,915 --> 00:50:03,945

Laura: He's already down

because he lost his stapler.

00:50:04,703 --> 00:50:08,693

Xhafer: Peter meets with the Bobs and

finds he's getting a promotion and that

00:50:08,693 --> 00:50:13,783

they are firing his friends who are

still having issues with the printer.

00:50:14,543 --> 00:50:15,023

Laura: Yeah.

00:50:16,053 --> 00:50:17,283

PC load letter.

00:50:17,923 --> 00:50:19,763

That's a reference I've made in an

00:50:19,814 --> 00:50:21,573

Xhafer: Ha, ha.

00:50:21,573 --> 00:50:22,453

ha.

00:50:22,808 --> 00:50:26,128

Peter has Michael over for a drink

to tell him he's gonna get let go

00:50:26,128 --> 00:50:31,888

ahead of time, and he reveals that

his plan is the plot to Superman 3.

00:50:33,098 --> 00:50:38,178

But also, like, I get recommended

videos in my YouTube algorithm for

00:50:38,178 --> 00:50:40,458

people to do this with cryptocurrency.

00:50:40,713 --> 00:50:42,133

Laura: Oh, no.

00:50:42,373 --> 00:50:43,753

That doesn't seem smart.

00:50:44,228 --> 00:50:47,478

Xhafer: There's a whole, there's a whole

thing where it's all like, you take

00:50:47,478 --> 00:50:53,458

advantage of the volatile nature of the

market, and so, because transactions

00:50:53,458 --> 00:51:00,358

take moments to process, There is a

change in the exchange rate in between

00:51:00,358 --> 00:51:07,008

them processing, and so, and so you will

send, you will intercept the transaction.

00:51:07,601 --> 00:51:14,566

And then buy the remainder of whatever

was left over from the uh, you

00:51:14,566 --> 00:51:16,086

like, you complete the transaction.

00:51:16,086 --> 00:51:19,986

So you pay whatever the transaction price

was, but you end up with a little bit more

00:51:19,986 --> 00:51:21,966

because of the change in exchange rate.

00:51:22,861 --> 00:51:23,251

Laura: Mm hmm.

00:51:23,326 --> 00:51:26,006

Xhafer: you automate this with the

computer program to make sure that it

00:51:26,006 --> 00:51:27,096

only happens when it's advantageous.

00:51:27,096 --> 00:51:33,027

And all it takes is like a

hundred thousand dollars worth of

00:51:33,027 --> 00:51:37,147

cryptocurrency to have in the bank to

be able to manage the transactions.

00:51:37,337 --> 00:51:38,007

Fucking.

00:51:38,412 --> 00:51:39,242

Laura: All it takes.

00:51:40,687 --> 00:51:41,902

Xhafer: Yeah.

00:51:43,302 --> 00:51:43,692

Laura: Yeah.

00:51:43,822 --> 00:51:44,142

Yeah.

00:51:45,162 --> 00:51:47,312

Xhafer: It's just like, I saw

someone post on Facebook today.

00:51:47,312 --> 00:51:51,812

It's like, look, all you need to do is

put 3 million in an 8 percent treasury

00:51:51,832 --> 00:51:54,662

bond and you'll yield 20, 000 a month.

00:51:57,402 --> 00:51:58,342

It's not that hard.

00:51:58,382 --> 00:51:59,252

It's just all like.

00:51:59,697 --> 00:52:00,287

Oh my god.

00:52:01,062 --> 00:52:01,362

Laura: Yeah.

00:52:01,682 --> 00:52:02,892

It's not that hard, Ja'far.

00:52:02,992 --> 00:52:05,562

I mean, we have the 1.

00:52:05,562 --> 00:52:07,812

8 million dollars already for

two chicks at the same time.

00:52:07,812 --> 00:52:12,852

Oh,

00:52:12,877 --> 00:52:13,487

Xhafer: savings.

00:52:14,983 --> 00:52:17,383

You have 2 million in a high yield

savings account, then you're getting

00:52:17,393 --> 00:52:20,203

100, 000 a year to live off of.

00:52:20,688 --> 00:52:21,418

Laura: okay, okay.

00:52:23,804 --> 00:52:25,994

Xhafer: When asked that question,

that's always my answer.

00:52:26,939 --> 00:52:29,489

Laura: I mean, or you can just

have it and have two chicks at the

00:52:29,489 --> 00:52:30,489

same time, that's all I'm saying.

00:52:30,694 --> 00:52:38,894

I can't stop saying it, sorry.

00:52:43,834 --> 00:52:48,074

Okay, so yeah, we're going to steal

fractions of pennies into a bank account.

00:52:48,374 --> 00:52:48,794

Xhafer: Mm-Hmm.

00:52:49,264 --> 00:52:52,839

pile 'em up over the day,

get a dollar or two a day.

00:52:52,839 --> 00:52:53,889

It will add up over time.

00:52:53,889 --> 00:52:54,729

Whatever it is.

00:52:55,269 --> 00:52:57,639

So Peter encourages Michael to go for it.

00:52:58,079 --> 00:53:02,129

They get Samir to buy into the plan

because they need his expertise.

00:53:02,779 --> 00:53:06,409

Uh, someone uses the term

fudge packers at some point,

00:53:07,389 --> 00:53:07,869

which.

00:53:08,234 --> 00:53:10,944

Which I hadn't heard in a very long time.

00:53:11,044 --> 00:53:12,224

Laura: Right, right.

00:53:12,947 --> 00:53:15,897

Xhafer: that's, that's a language

choice that was made in a movie.

00:53:16,217 --> 00:53:17,107

Laura: Mm hmm.

00:53:17,277 --> 00:53:19,907

That's, that's our, another

Animal House moment.

00:53:21,569 --> 00:53:29,019

Xhafer: Was funny or like, cause

it's, it's not even like it's, even

00:53:29,019 --> 00:53:34,119

as like an insult, it's like, you

just, you're saying a thing to not

00:53:34,119 --> 00:53:36,249

say the thing, just say the thing.

00:53:36,279 --> 00:53:38,669

I've, I've always felt that

that should be the case.

00:53:38,669 --> 00:53:40,089

Like, don't.

00:53:40,664 --> 00:53:46,424

Don't try and make it slightly more

acceptable by saying a different thing.

00:53:46,424 --> 00:53:48,674

If you're going to be a piece

of shit, just be a piece of

00:53:48,674 --> 00:53:50,264

shit and out yourself, please.

00:53:51,179 --> 00:53:51,589

Laura: yeah.

00:53:51,659 --> 00:53:54,929

They don't, they want to think that

they're not a piece of shit though.

00:53:55,464 --> 00:53:58,034

Xhafer: Well, most pieces of shit

don't know they're a piece of shit.

00:53:58,044 --> 00:53:59,914

That's why they're a piece of shit.

00:53:59,934 --> 00:54:03,234

Laura: Yeah, yeah, they're still

doing mental gymnastics, which

00:54:03,254 --> 00:54:05,214

comes out as verbal choices.

00:54:05,994 --> 00:54:06,404

Xhafer: Yeah.

00:54:06,405 --> 00:54:11,864

Yes,

00:54:12,794 --> 00:54:15,744

Laura: These two devs have to

sit in the same cubicle together?

00:54:16,114 --> 00:54:17,044

Speaking of hell.

00:54:17,045 --> 00:54:21,167

For real.

00:54:21,518 --> 00:54:26,458

Xhafer: I, I spent some time

in a four person cube and that

00:54:26,458 --> 00:54:28,128

was working a call center.

00:54:29,418 --> 00:54:33,718

Of every job on earth that

should have its own cube.

00:54:35,350 --> 00:54:40,090

put the people who are in meetings

together all the time in a four person

00:54:40,090 --> 00:54:45,960

cube and let the rest of us in the

call center not have to listen to other

00:54:45,960 --> 00:54:47,890

people in the call center, please.

00:54:47,930 --> 00:54:51,780

Laura: real, like, I could not do that

job because, like, when people start

00:54:51,780 --> 00:54:56,180

talking around me and I'm trying to

talk to another person, I will not

00:54:56,190 --> 00:54:58,610

process anything that anyone is saying.

00:55:00,310 --> 00:55:01,730

Xhafer: But it's the lowest paid job.

00:55:01,730 --> 00:55:03,750

So we're going to pack

you in like sardines.

00:55:03,900 --> 00:55:04,270

Laura: Yeah.

00:55:04,400 --> 00:55:04,740

Yeah.

00:55:05,240 --> 00:55:08,800

So you can't do your job effectively,

because why would we want that?

00:55:09,480 --> 00:55:09,990

Xhafer: Mm hmm.

00:55:10,632 --> 00:55:13,462

I mean, nah, that whole team's

been outsourced anyways,

00:55:13,742 --> 00:55:14,102

Laura: Yeah.

00:55:14,342 --> 00:55:15,162

They're in India now.

00:55:15,172 --> 00:55:15,192

Yeah.

00:55:15,192 --> 00:55:15,497

Yeah.

00:55:15,497 --> 00:55:15,802

Yeah.

00:55:15,972 --> 00:55:16,932

Xhafer: Yeah, it's true.

00:55:18,327 --> 00:55:23,187

Laura: Yeah, so we get the virus, We

steal a printer and we beat it up.

00:55:23,527 --> 00:55:27,087

Xhafer: Did you catch the file,

the virus's file name was virus?

00:55:29,754 --> 00:55:32,084

Laura: Yeah, I mean, why not?

00:55:32,614 --> 00:55:34,164

Gotta clearly label your code.

00:55:34,854 --> 00:55:37,534

Xhafer: Yeah, Norton's having

a field day with that one.

00:55:38,034 --> 00:55:41,604

We hear of Tom's suicide

attempt turned car accident.

00:55:42,344 --> 00:55:48,034

And drunk driving settlement, giving

him the aforementioned million dollars.

00:55:48,763 --> 00:55:49,593

Laura: Wonderful.

00:55:49,863 --> 00:55:50,613

Wonderful.

00:55:51,773 --> 00:55:54,073

Xhafer: He's not interested in

two chicks at the same time,

00:55:54,293 --> 00:55:55,923

Laura: No, he's got bigger plans.

00:55:56,443 --> 00:56:00,383

Xhafer: mostly healthcare, but once he

gets past that, he's going to finally

00:56:00,383 --> 00:56:03,223

build his jump to conclusions, Matt.

00:56:03,543 --> 00:56:09,503

This is the thing that I easily

reference the most from this movie.

00:56:10,048 --> 00:56:10,578

Laura: Yeah.

00:56:11,243 --> 00:56:13,743

Xhafer: Whenever someone in a team chat.

00:56:14,713 --> 00:56:18,113

says, makes a logical

leap that I disagree with

00:56:19,313 --> 00:56:23,733

of any kind or like a thing where I

just think they're taking it too far.

00:56:24,023 --> 00:56:29,303

I will just post an animated gif

of the jump to conclusions, Matt.

00:56:29,803 --> 00:56:30,803

I have it on lock.

00:56:30,813 --> 00:56:33,453

It's on my, it's on my gif speed dial.

00:56:33,454 --> 00:56:36,343

Yeah,

00:56:36,598 --> 00:56:39,558

Laura: the times that I read an

academic paper and I disagree

00:56:39,558 --> 00:56:40,778

with their conclusions.

00:56:42,403 --> 00:56:44,143

Xhafer: that's exactly

what it's there for.

00:56:44,908 --> 00:56:46,698

Laura: Perfect, love it.

00:56:49,055 --> 00:56:51,395

Xhafer: for Amir and Michael.

00:56:51,535 --> 00:56:55,895

Peter steals that shitty printer

and they smash it in the field.

00:56:56,525 --> 00:56:57,905

Also Samir can breakdance.

00:57:01,265 --> 00:57:03,885

Laura: This is a beautiful scene, like

00:57:04,845 --> 00:57:07,705

cinematography, choreography.

00:57:08,750 --> 00:57:09,660

Actors.

00:57:10,178 --> 00:57:12,208

Hell, like costume choices.

00:57:12,228 --> 00:57:14,398

It's all brilliant.

00:57:14,983 --> 00:57:15,313

Xhafer: Yeah.

00:57:15,987 --> 00:57:17,197

they get super drunk.

00:57:18,017 --> 00:57:21,627

And then he sends them home

so Joanna can come over.

00:57:23,917 --> 00:57:25,217

They do not have a DD.

00:57:25,307 --> 00:57:26,757

This is before Uber exists.

00:57:26,757 --> 00:57:28,797

He walks them to their cars.

00:57:29,282 --> 00:57:30,332

Laura: Oh man, he

00:57:30,532 --> 00:57:32,862

Xhafer: What a shitty friend!

00:57:33,302 --> 00:57:35,572

Oh, he's the fucking worst!

00:57:36,022 --> 00:57:38,622

Laura: He should have just let

him crash on Lawrence's couch.

00:57:38,662 --> 00:57:40,092

I'm sure Lawrence is good.

00:57:40,532 --> 00:57:43,552

Xhafer: Yeah, Lawrence,

Joanna's coming over.

00:57:44,242 --> 00:57:46,552

Can you let these guys

crash on your couch, please?

00:57:46,582 --> 00:57:47,082

Laura: Mm hmm.

00:57:47,582 --> 00:57:47,812

He's

00:57:47,822 --> 00:57:50,952

Xhafer: Or maybe, or maybe

just don't have sex that night.

00:57:53,672 --> 00:57:56,042

Maybe care about your friends lives more.

00:57:56,472 --> 00:57:57,542

Random thought.

00:57:58,032 --> 00:58:00,672

Although I guess maybe the

goal would be to kill them?

00:58:01,388 --> 00:58:06,308

If he kills them, then he's

Completely innocent at this point,

00:58:06,778 --> 00:58:08,278

because they did everything.

00:58:08,708 --> 00:58:12,918

They're the only other ones who know

besides Lawrence, and he could just have

00:58:12,918 --> 00:58:14,488

the bank account and not have to split it?

00:58:15,100 --> 00:58:15,580

Laura: Yeah.

00:58:15,650 --> 00:58:18,700

I mean, he's on the bank account,

so that's traceable, right?

00:58:19,770 --> 00:58:24,410

Xhafer: Maybe, I mean, I mean,

hypothetically, you run it through an LLC

00:58:24,410 --> 00:58:29,890

or two to try and hide it, but like, maybe

he's the one who made the decimal entry.

00:58:29,890 --> 00:58:32,540

Maybe Michael didn't fuck

up in a couple of scenes.

00:58:32,780 --> 00:58:35,650

Maybe he did it because

he's a coder too, right?

00:58:35,920 --> 00:58:38,400

There's no reason he couldn't

go and change a decimal point

00:58:38,710 --> 00:58:39,990

and maybe he tried to kill them.

00:58:39,990 --> 00:58:42,380

And maybe that's the secret of this movie.

00:58:42,500 --> 00:58:44,690

Laura: You just made

office space really dark.

00:58:44,730 --> 00:58:45,610

I don't like that.

00:58:45,630 --> 00:58:46,800

I'm dialing it back.

00:58:46,810 --> 00:58:48,420

We're rolling back the tape.