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Awaken Your Mastery - The Demartini Show
Episode 16025th November 2022 • The Demartini Show • Dr John Demartini
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You have control over your perceptions, decisions and actions and no matter what happens in your life you have a choice on how you respond. Join Dr Demartini and discover how no matter what you’ve been through; no matter what you are going through; you can make a heaven out of your hell or a hell out of your heaven if you know how to balance your perceptions and extract the deeper meaning and the hidden order out of each event you perceive.

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Transcripts

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Anytime we become synthesized and balanced in our perception,

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the more advanced part of the brain comes online. So the question is,

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would you like to be master of your destiny or do you want to be a victim of

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your history?

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If we look very carefully at our nervous system,

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we have what is called a primitive nervous system,

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which is what's called the diffuse nervous system and the central nervous

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system.

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The peripheral sensory input from the world around us

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and the peripheral motor output to the world around us is

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the diffuse, primitive, old nervous system, you might say,

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from the epithelium and subdermal areas of the brain and of the skin.

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Then there's a central nervous system, which is primarily interneurons.

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You have sensory neurons coming in,

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interneurons and motor neurons,

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and they're primarily for sensory perception and

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decision, and motor actions.

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So those are the three basic types of neurons that we have.

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And the central nervous system is the one that we are here to design to be able

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to govern our perceptions and actions.

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The most primitive nervous system was a,

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what they called like a deep tendon reflex

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when somebody puts their leg over each other and hits it with a little reflex

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hammer, a reflex that just goes without having any control.

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So if you put your knee over it and hit it with that reflex hammer and it just

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jerks, that's what is called a mono synaptic reflex.

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That means you have a sensory nerve going in, it goes right onto a motor nerve,

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there's no interneurons, there's no central nervous system really involved,

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it's just a two peripheral nerves coming in, one sensory, one motor,

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one the back, one the front of the brain or the spinal cord,

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and you get this reaction. It's all or none, either fires or doesn't fire.

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That's why you got to hit a bunch of times. Sometimes it fires,

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sometimes it doesn't.

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And you kind of don't have much control over that.

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You can sit there and try to overrule it, but your knee's going to jerk.

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And that's where you don't have control over your perceptions and your actions.

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But when information comes in and then goes up the spinal cord,

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up these tracks and goes into the brain stem and up into the brain itself,

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as it does, the number of interneurons grows exponentially.

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And when you do, you now have new associations you make with the stimulus.

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And because of the most advanced part of the brain can govern the motor

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response, you can now decide how you're going to respond.

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So you have these evoked potentials coming in from sensory and motor

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responses, like deep tendon reflex,

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and you have spontaneous responses inside the brain where you're

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basically taking command of what you see or sense and what you decide to do

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with it. I always say that when we're living in the most primitive one,

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we're kind of like victims of our environment, victims of our history.

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But when we let the more advanced central nervous system,

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the integrator take command, we become masters of our destiny.

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So if you want to awaken your mastery and take command of your perceptions,

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decisions, and actions, you want to go up into the higher areas of the brain.

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Now this is an interesting phenomenon.

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Why do we have such a stimulus response,

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a conditioned reflex, or an unconditioned reflex, and then,

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how do we then add to it condition reflex,

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like Pavlov had put or Skinner had put, upper conditioning,

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where you take a stimulus and you add new associations on it,

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change the perceptions of it and then decide, okay,

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I'm not going to react that way, I'm going to act a different way.

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For many years now, three and a half decades almost,

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I have been teaching a program called the Breakthrough Experience.

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And in there I've been doing what I've introduced what is called the Demartini

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Method, where we take perceptions and change the perceptions,

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change the ratios of perceptions,

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change the levels of the brain that are firing and change our response to a

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stimuli.

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I always say that there's nothing your mortal body can experience that your

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immortal soul, the authentic you, the unconditionally loving you,

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can't transcend and govern. So the more we go up in the brain,

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the more governance we have,

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the more we go down to the primitive part of the brain,

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the more we're victims of our world around us.

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We're either a follower and run by the world externally or we're a leader and

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run from within.

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I always say that a master listens to their physiology and intuition,

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introspectively, instead of having to listen,

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extrospectively to the outside world, to politics and religion,

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which runs people's life, the moralities of that.

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And most people are subordinating to that and letting the outside stimuli run

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them, the news, the tv, the magazines, the newspapers, et cetera,

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instead of actually running from within.

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Living by design instead of living by reaction.

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We actually have two parts of our brain as we go up the brain.

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We have a subcortical area of the brain called systems 1 thinking that's

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involved in immediate fast conducting emotional reactions from stimuli.

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And then we have the more advanced part of the brain, prefrontal cortex,

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which is systems 2 thinking, which is more governed, a little slower,

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where we think before we react.

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We have a choice in our life to think before we react or react before we think.

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If we're in survival, we typically react before we think. If we're in thrival,

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we tend to think before we react.

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So what is it that makes the difference between having a diffuse primitive

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nervous system and reactions run our life vs an advanced mastery?

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Okay, so listen carefully and take the notes.

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The ratios of your perception determine what areas of the brain and what

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neurotransmitters and what parts of the interneurons are firing.

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So if you have an event to come along,

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let's say you meet somebody that you're enamored with,

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infatuated with and look up to,

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and all of a sudden you are conscious of the upsides and unconscious of any

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downsides, highly infatuated. Well,

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the ratio of perception is most all positive and no negative,

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or more positive and less negative.

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The stronger that reaction, the more it's all positive and no negative,

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or mostly positive and very little negative,

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the more the primitive response goes off.

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Because now it represents prey and our brain sets up impulses because of this

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subjectively biased interpretation of our reality,

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sets up impulses with adrenaline to capture the prey to eat,

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because it's something we want to eat.

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That's why when we are infatuated with people,

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we want to kiss them or we want to hug them, we want to consume them,

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if you will. But we can also have the other side of the equation.

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We could have something that represents a predator to us,

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that we're conscious of the downsides and unconscious of the upsides and

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it's all negative and no positive or mostly negative and less positive.

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And now we have an instinct that fires off,

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a gut instinct just like we had a gut impulse when we were consuming it,

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a gut instinct to avoid it and to get the adrenaline going to get the heck out

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of there. And this is a survival response.

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So anytime we have a subjectively bias, skew, distorted,

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exaggerated, or minimized perception,

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where we're conscious of the positives and unconscious of the negatives or

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unconscious of the negatives, conscious of the negatives,

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unconscious of the positives,

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we automatically fire off the diffuse and the primitive part of the nervous

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system. And when it's all positive and no negative,

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it's like a mono synaptic reflex. We have no control over it,

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because we got to get out of it or we got to get it.

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But if it's more balanced and we bring it into a balanced state,

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it goes past the primitive system goes up into the most advanced part of the

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brain, we now think logically,

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objectively with reason and we now act without

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reacting. Because we're now not in emergency.

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We're not starving for food and fearing the loss of food or frightened about

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predator, about to be eaten. So anytime we're in a highly polarized state,

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the primitive system comes online and anytime we become synthesized and balanced

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in our perception, the more advanced part of the brain comes onine.

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So the question is would you like to be master of your destiny or do you want to

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be a victim of your history?

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Do you want to have systems 2 running your life where you're thinking before

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reacting or systems 1, where you're reacting before thinking,

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do you you want to act reasonable or emotional? Now some might say,

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Well I'm going to probably do both. Most likely you will in your life.

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And if you are overrun by your emotional reactions,

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you'll have a dramatic life, highly polarized,

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dramatic life and people that are extremely dramatic end up being labeled

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bipolar, unstable, emotional with volatility.

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And as you know, that's not the way to master your life. As Warren Buffet says,

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until you can manage your emotions, don't expect to manage money. Greene says,

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Robert Greene says, until you can manage your emotions,

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don't expect to be a leader. If you can't manage your emotions,

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don't expect to have a stable health wellbeing.

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So anytime we can bring our mind back into balance,

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our perceptions back into balance, we help our most advanced part of our brain,

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the blood, glucose,

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and oxygen goes into the forebrain when we have a balanced perspective and it

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goes into the amygdala and down into the hindbrain and into the spinal cord when

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we don't. So one is survival, as I said, and the other's thrival,

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you decide where you want play, this is it.

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You can awaken up the most advanced part and take command and master your life

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or you can just let yourself, you know, without any effort, just keep reacting.

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So I developed in the Breakthrough Experience a methodology that I've

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incorporated in it called the Demartini Method.

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And so I want you to just listen really carefully to some of the language and

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the wording of the questions because the quality of your life's based on the

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quality of the questions you ask.

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Questions bring unconscious information conscious.

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If you want to write something, write that down.

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The questions you ask in your life is what makes you concentrate on what you're

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focused on.

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So if you ask quality questions and make unconscious information conscious,

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you can take the polarized perspective and become fully conscious.

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Because if you're infatuated, you're conscious of the upsides,

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unconscious of the downside, if you're resentful,

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you're conscious of the downsides, unconscious of the upsides.

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When you're in love, you're conscious of both sides.

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True love is not an emotion of polarity,

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although most people think infatuation and confuse it with love.

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Infatuation is seeing all the positives, not the negatives.

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And resentment's seeing all the negatives, not the positives,

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but true love is embracing both. So if you want more love in life,

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if you want true gratitude in life or grace in life,

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it's knowing how to ask the question to make you conscious of the part you're

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unconscious of to balance out the perceptions,

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so you go into the forebrain so you can take command of your life,

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the path of mastery. The forebrain is called the executive center.

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If you want to be an executive and paid like an executive and function like an

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executive and rise up the social game,

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it's to your advantage to learn how to balance your perspective.

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So in the Breakthrough Experience, when I teach the Demartini Method,

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I basically ask people the question,

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let's say you're highly resentful to somebody and you're conscious of the

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downsides, unconscious of the upsides. You ask a question; What specific trait,

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action,

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or inaction do I perceive this individual displaying or demonstrating

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that I despise, dislike, hate, most or want to avoid most?

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And I define it, instead of nebulous. By the way,

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you never have fear of the unknown,

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you have fear of the content that's in your mind.

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So if you actually have a resentment,

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you have content in the mind that's giving you that feeling,

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that emotional response. So what you do is you go back and what specific trait,

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action,

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inaction do you perceive this individual displaying or demonstrating that you

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despise, dislike or hate or want to avoid most? And get it clear what that is,

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what exactly is it? And it can't be something somebody

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It can't be broad, vague generalities and labels,

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like terrible person or abusive.

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That's not a specific action.

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Specific action is they verbally criticized me Tuesday.

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And and you don't want to write down you know how it made you feel,

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because that's your feeling, and you're in control of your feelings, not,

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I want to know what their actions are.

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And then you don't want to put down something that's

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You want to have something that's emotional in your language.

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So what you do is you basically write down what they did. Then,

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that makes you now conscious of what you're reacting to.

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And if you're not conscious of it and you're just unconsciously reacting to

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things, we call it anxiety.

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But if you become conscious of what's actually triggering a reaction,

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that's because most of our reactions are because of past experiences from

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childhood to all the way to where we are today that are stored in the

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subconscious mind that are impulses and instincts that are there because of

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imbalanced perspectives in the past that this is now reminding us of.

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Once we identify what it is, we go to the second question,

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and you say this to yourself, All right John,

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go to a moment where and when I perceive myself displaying or

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demonstrating that same or similar specific trait, action,

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or inaction that I disliked in them.

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And at first you're going to be too proud to want to admit that you do that.

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But as it's been stated for thousands of years in biblical writings and

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philosophers and now in psychology,

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you will not resent somebody on the outside unless they're reminding you of

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something you have on the inside that you feel ashamed of.

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Just like you will not admire somebody on the outside unless they're reminding

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you of something you're too humble to admit,

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but you actually have that you admire in yourself that you're proud of.

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You only see on the outside parts of what's going on on the inside.

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So if you go in there and identify where you did it, when you did it,

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to whom you did it to and who perceived you doing it,

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as you accumulate that until the quantity and quality of where you've done it is

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equal to theirs,

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you start to realize that you got a finger pointing at them and three back at

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yourself who are you to judge that individual. When you do,

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you calm down some of the reaction,

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you now identify what the reaction is stimulated by, that reflex,

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you now look at what you're doing, because the second you do it,

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you're a little less judging and you take out some of the polarity,

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some of the highly conscious and unconscious content

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balance. Then you go one step further.

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You ask now go to a moment where and when you perceive this individual

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displaying or demonstrating the specific trait, action,

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or in action that you dislike or despise most, are you there?

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Make sure you're there in that moment,

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because in the moment of perception is where conscious and unconscious content

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splits and we then been become unconscious of things and we just get

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subjectively biased distorting things.

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We create an opinion instead of a fact about what's happening.

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And we distort our reality. So the moment we go there at that moment,

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from that moment till now, how is their behavior a service to you,

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a benefit to you? What's the advantages? The upsides?

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You see any trait that's on this planet,

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it would've gone extinct if it didn't have some function or service on the

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planet. Just because you haven't seen it,

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just because you've inculcated maybe some moral hypocrisies about how life's

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supposed to be and fantasies about people are supposed to be one-sided and never

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both sided, doesn't mean that that behavior doesn't serve.

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So I've been doing this now for nearly four decades,

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three and a half decades and more,

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and I am certain that if you look and you don't make anything up,

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but if you look carefully you can find the blessings and benefits to anything.

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And if you look at it and I've taken people through most horrendous stuff and

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found the blessings in it, turned it into an opportunity,

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instead of having reaction and having post traumatic stress disorder,

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they're now going back and you might say post traumatic bless disorder or

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order, because now you're seeing the upsides.

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If you stack up the advantages and make the advantages and keep going and keep

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going and find the advantages and see how it helps you spiritually,

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intellectually, in business, in your finances, in your family, in your health,

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in your social life,

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in your spiritual quest and look at how it's serving your highest values and

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what's most important to you and what you feel your mission in life is.

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If you ask and keep stacking up the benefits,

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when the benefits equal the drawbacks,

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it's no longer something that you're conscious of the negatives on and not

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conscious of the positives on, you're now fully conscious of both.

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And all of a sudden the thing,

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instead of having a reaction where you're now got an instinct to avoid it,

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and it's running you and you have no choice over it

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you now have given yourself permission to take command of your life.

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Now if you go a further step and you now go to a moment where and when you

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perceive yourself displaying or demonstrating it,

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to who you've demonstrated to and who perceives you doing it,

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and then look at how it served those individuals.

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Because otherwise you're carrying around shame and guilt and anything you feel

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shame and guilt about is stored in your subconscious mind is going to keep

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bringing in people into your life that push your button. It's your button,

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their action is their action, but your button is your button.

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And your button is stored imbalance perspectives,

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stored as reverberating circuits in the brain that haven't been balanced and

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that automatically make you like an animal reacting from that subconscious

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state. And you're now like that reflex hammer, you have no control,

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you keep reacting,

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this person pushes my buttons and you want to falsely attribute they're the

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cause of the way you're reacting,

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but they're not the cause because you can take command of your life by asking

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the quality questions and balance out your perceptions and change your reactions

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to whatever's happening in your life. And the moment you do,

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you change the area of the brain and you go up into it.

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And the more associations you make, the higher the brain areas you go.

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When you do,

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you now have a governed behavior and your actions are refined like a dimmer

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switch instead of all or none, it's now graced.

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And now you're functioning from a graceful state.

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There's what they call the cortical spinal track,

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which is a track of nerves that go all the way from the very peripheral area of

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the cortex all the way down to the front of the brain where the motor neurons

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are.

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And what's interesting if all of a sudden you have a balanced orientation that

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fires and it brings fine governed refined

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skills in your motor actions, grace.

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But if not you have a spastic reflex, get the heck out of there quick, impulse,

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instinct, jerk responses.

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So by asking the question and finding out how what you did served others,

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you dissolve the shame and guilt.

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Now if you go a step further and ask the question,

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go to a moment where and when you perceive this individual that you are judging

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and resenting, displaying or demonstrating the exact opposite behavior to you.

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Because the truth is they have both sides. You support them,

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they can be nice to you, you challenge them, they can be mean, you support them,

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they can be generous to you, challenge them, they can be you know,

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stingy to you. They're going to have both sides.

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And to label somebody one side and not see both sides is not to fully appreciate

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the wholeness of another individual.

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So if you balance out that equation and see both sides,

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all of a sudden your reaction to them again, calms down.

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You're bringing things back into homeostasis, back into balance.

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As Walter Cannon, his book, The Wisdom of Body,

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the second we do our physiology emerges more effectively

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and we start having wellness, we start having less reaction.

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We start to have governance mastery.

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We start to be inspired by our life instead of reactive to the outside

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circumstances, victim of our history.

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Then if we go a step further and find out at that exact moment when they're

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doing this, who in our life,

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in our mind or in reality is playing out the opposite role?

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Nature has a balancing act.

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When I was in my twenties I wrote a book on the Illusional Basis of Man's Health

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and Disease and how perception illusions created illness.

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And I found out that all perceptions are contrast.

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Wilhelm Wundt around 130 years ago wrote about simultaneous and

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sequential contrast in the brain. Every perceptions compared to its opposite.

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If you infatuate something you resent its opposite.

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If you resent something you infatuate with its opposite.

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They're simultaneous in the brain,

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the brain has memory and anti-memory to balance things.

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If you find that out and find the opposite at the same moment that it's being

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compared to because you can't,

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you can't have a reaction to something unless you compare it to its opposite.

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The moment you find that out and balance that and see them simultaneously,

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you'll realize there was nothing there except a great opportunity to teach you

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how to be authentic. Because when you resent something,

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you puff yourself up in pride and that's inauthentic.

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When you infatuate with something,

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you minimize yourself in shame and that's inauthentic.

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But if you balance out the equation,

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you get to be authentic and every human being wants to be loved and appreciate

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for who they are, not for the fantasies we make on ourselves.

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And then we have one last question and another question.

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I actually have a whole series of them, about 80 questions,

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but these are the first series of them, first octave.

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Go to the moment where and when you perceived them displaying this trait,

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at that moment, if they had done the opposite of what they did,

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and they'd been verbally crying to you, for instance,

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instead of verbally critical, what would've been the drawback?

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Because as long as you're addicted and have a fantasy about how life's supposed

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to be, one sided,

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you're not going to appreciate the other side that comes with it.

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Life has two sides, like a yin and yang sign.

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And if you don't appreciate that Taoist understanding of the pair of opposites

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in life,

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you're going to constantly be trying to avoid something in life and seek

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something in life.

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The Buddha said that the desire for that which is unobtainable,

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one side of the pole, and the desire to avoid that which is unavoidable,

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the other side of the pole, is the source of human suffering.

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So I go through and I have people ask those seven questions in the Breakthrough

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Experience, and they take resentments that they've had for days, weeks, months,

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years, or decades, and it dissolves away. We dissolve it.

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And we also take infatuations dissolve it.

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We take prides within ourselves and dissolve it.

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Shames in ourselves and dissolve it.

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All the emotions that are stored in the subconscious mind that are causing

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impulse and instincts and causing us to react from the external world are all

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dissolvable.

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And that's why I want you to know that you have the power to awaken your mastery

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and take command of your perceptions, decisions, and actions.

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That's what this message is about.

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And if for some reason you would like to master that skill, man,

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I love helping people do that.

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That's what I love teaching in the Breakthrough Experience.

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The Demartini Method.

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HI've been developing it for five decades and the method has been incorporated

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in the Breakthrough Experience for 30 something years now.

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So if you would love to master your life,

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come and join me at what I call the Breakthrough Experience.

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It's my signature program that I've done in 1154 times in many,

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many countries around the world to over a hundred thousand people. And,

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I just know that if an individual is to apply the method,

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they could use that the rest of their life to dissolve the baggage that

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accumulates. And if you're in a deep,

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intimate relationship and that accumulates,

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you know what happens in relationships, if that happens at work,

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if it happens in your social life, it's affecting your health.

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Everything you judge on the outside is making you judge something on the inside

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at the same time.

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And that's you weighing yourself down with gravitational baggage instead of

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lifting yourself up with radiational wisdom.

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So if you'd like to have systems 2 thinking run your

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come to the Breakthrough Experience.

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The Breakthrough Experience is the path of mastery. You master your mind,

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you master your life. And in the process of doing it,

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I can teach you a whole bunch of new advantage principles that you can do that

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can help you master your life,

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help you identify what your values are and help you get clear about what's

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priority to you and help you learn how to communicate effectively in other

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people's values, what's important to you, how to delegate things,

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how to take command,

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how to increase your self worth so you can have more deserve and more wealth in

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your life. How to have more effective,

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respectful communication to the people you interact with.

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How to have equanimity and equity when you're dealing with transactions and

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people in business and in financial matters.

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There's so many benefits from coming to the Breakthrough Experience and how to

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not sit there and put people on pedestals and pits, the questions to ask.

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The first seven I just gave you is just seven of many.

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There's just literally 80 questions in that method that allows you to master

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your life. So if you would love to master your life,

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come and join me at the Breakthrough Experience.

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I'm absolutely certain it can make a difference in your life.

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I've asked people all these years since I've been teaching at the end of the

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program,

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How many of you learned something this weekend that you could have gone your

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whole life and not learn if you hadn't been here? Every hand goes up.

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Because it's 24 hours with me. You just got about 30 minutes with me.

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But 24 hours going through and practically applying new questions,

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the quality of your life's based on the quality of the questions you ask.

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If you're ready to go and transform your life and not be victim of history and

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be a master of destiny and take command of your perceptions,

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decisions and actions and take command of your brain so you can live in the

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executive function instead of just the amygdala function,

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then come and join me at the Breakthrough Experience.

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I'm absolutely certain it can make a difference in your life.

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Let me help you do that exact thing for your life. And until next week,

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this is Dr. Demartini. I love you.

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Make sure you take command of your perceptions, decisions,

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and actions starting today. I'll see you at the Breakthrough.