Shownotes
Kinse the kobold has never met a dragon quite like Wylia, but she’s determined to give her the best party she can!
Today’s story is “Unpredictability” by Nenekiri Bookwyrm, who is a dragon that makes games and writes stories. He’s also been known to paint and play the ukelele on occasion. When he’s not reading from his hoard of To-Read books, he makes time to write some stories of his own. You can find more of his stories on www.nenekiri.com.
Read for you by Khaki, your faithful fireside companion.
Transcripts
You’re listening to The Voice of Dog.
Speaker:I’m Khaki, your faithful fireside companion,
Speaker:and today’s story is
Speaker:“Unpredictability”
Speaker:by Nenekiri Bookwyrm,
Speaker:who is a dragon that makes games and writes stories.
Speaker:He’s also been known to paint and play the ukelele on occasion.
Speaker:When he’s not reading from his hoard of To-Read books,
Speaker:he makes time to write some stories of his own.
Speaker:You can find more of his stories
Speaker:on www.nenekiri.
Speaker:www.nenekiri.com. Please enjoy:
Speaker:“Unpredictability”
Speaker:by Nenekiri Bookwyrm
Speaker:Kinse the kobold strained under the weight of her pack as she climbed up the steep mountainside.
Speaker:Exhausting as this part of her job was,
Speaker:she was always excited to meet a new client.
Speaker:Though her inexperience with the dragons of the Summervale Shore meant that she had packed an excessive amount of supplies to try and be prepared.
Speaker:She paused for a second
Speaker:and let the pack fall off her back with a *thud* onto the ground.
Speaker:She raised her hand up to her face to shield the sun from her eyes
Speaker:as she looked around for the mouth of the cave.
Speaker:Dragon’s lairs were usually well hidden,
Speaker:as a rule of thumb,
Speaker:but Kinse had gotten used to finding the little tells that would allow her to talk to her clients.
Speaker:A small shimmer of magic next to an unassuming bush,
Speaker:the prevalence of dangerous spikes of rock at the bottom of a hill,
Speaker:or even something as subtle as a construction sign steering passersby in the opposite direction.
Speaker:Dragons were secretive,
Speaker:and they liked to keep their addresses unknown to most of the world.
Speaker:This was a particularly tricky hurdle to cross with her business
Speaker:until a past client of hers had taught her some magic.
Speaker:Imbuing invitations with a memory spell made sure that her guests wouldn’t have to worry
Speaker:about unwanted visitors after the festivities were over.
Speaker:All of these traits were common knowledge about dragons and were particularly familiar to Kinse.
Speaker:So it was a shock
Speaker:to see that the entrance to her new client’s cave
Speaker:was not only wide open,
Speaker:but had a large gaudy mailbox in front of it in the shape of a fish.
Speaker:As Kinse walked closer to the mailbox, she could make out writing on the side of it.
Speaker:It had the name “Wylia” spelled out in draconic runes
Speaker:and a shortened address of “12 Mountain Top, Summervale Shore”.
Speaker:Attached to the mailbox was a string of brightly colored lights
Speaker:that led from the top of the mailbox over to the opening mouth of the cave.
Speaker:Kinse went back over to her pack
Speaker:and hefted it back onto her shoulders.
Speaker:She walked to the entrance with a puzzled expression the whole way.
Speaker:She had never seen a client be so brazen about their address before.
Speaker:It was so surprising that Kinse didn’t even realize
Speaker:that there wasn’t an inner door to the main chamber of the cave.
Speaker:She was so engrossed in thought about this peculiar behavior
Speaker:that she walked right in without even thinking about it.
Speaker:Kinse froze in place immediately when she realized where she was.
Speaker:She carefully removed her pack and set it down onto the ground
Speaker:as gently as she could.
Speaker:If she didn’t make too much noise, there was a chance that Wylia wouldn’t notice how rude she was,
Speaker:waltzing in without properly announcing herself.
Speaker:She’d learned firsthand that her clientele were quick to anger when it came to not showing the proper respect for a dragon.
Speaker:She absentmindedly brushed her hand through the hair on the top of her tail,
Speaker:making sure to avoid the patch of open scale that was burnt off.
Speaker:When she was satisfied that Wylia wouldn’t come barging into the room
Speaker:with a gout of flame following her out the mouth of the cave,
Speaker:Kinse began to walk around the main room.
Speaker:It was a quaint cave space that made good use of the proximity to the mountain and the shore.
Speaker:There was a small section in the back left corner
Speaker:that looked dug out into a small pit filled with flowing lava.
Speaker:Around the area were sharp utensils and some large plates with fish bones scattered on them.
Speaker:In the other corner there was a small stockpile of fish being kept on a line
Speaker:in slowly moving water.
Speaker:It gave the food a small amount of movement
Speaker:and served a dual purpose of decoration
Speaker:and food storage.
Speaker:There was a pile of treasure,
Speaker:as most dragons have,
Speaker:but it was not filled with gold and jewels.
Speaker:Kinse had seen enough hoards in her day to tell that these piled up records,
Speaker:kites, and clothes
Speaker:were Wylia’s prized possessions however.
Speaker:The biggest feature in the room was a huge hole in the mountain
Speaker:that seemed to fill into a water basin.
Speaker:The water was a beautiful blue
Speaker:and Kinse could see her brown scales and yellow eyes reflected in the surface of the pool.
Speaker:As she stared into the reflection,
Speaker:a large shape began to swim towards the surface at surprising speed.
Speaker:The shape broke out of the surface
Speaker:and showered the surrounding area of the pool with a mighty splash of water.
Speaker:Kinse was drenched from snout to tail in the aftermath
Speaker:but she could see what emerged from the pool.
Speaker:It was a water dragon,
Speaker:blue and green scales swirling into each other in spiraling patterns up and down their long body.
Speaker:Their shape was closer to that of a sea serpent
Speaker:but they still had the iconic visage of a dragon in their face.
Speaker:Instead of horns,
Speaker:they had large dark blue fins
Speaker:that protruded from the top of their head.
Speaker:A long tail and six legs with talons on each foot
Speaker:made up the rest of their form.
Speaker:Kinse was about to speak
Speaker:but was interrupted mid-sentence.
Speaker:“Sorry about that!
Speaker:I didn’t think you were still in the ‘Splash Zone’ when I came up to breach.
Speaker:There’s a set of towels along the wall over there.
Speaker:Might be a little big on you, but should help you get dried off.”
Speaker:Teeth chattering from the cold water,
Speaker:Kinse was bound and determined to introduce herself first. “G-gg-goood ee
Speaker:-e-evening M-m-miss Www-ww-wylia...”
Speaker:“Oh now, you stop that!
Speaker:No need to be so formal with me.
Speaker:You’re obviously cold and wet, so go dry yourself off. Sit by the lava chute and warm yourself up too while you’re at it.” “Yy-y-yes, mm-ma’aaa
Speaker:-am” Kinse covered herself up with a blanket that was three times her size and sat down next to the lava chute
Speaker:and let the ambient heat
Speaker:warm up her scales.
Speaker:Meanwhile, Wylia had made herself comfortable and laid her long body out on the floor of the cave so she could talk to Kinse easier.
Speaker:She kept her tail submerged though, and Kinse could see the waves it made as she moved it idly back and forth in the water.
Speaker:When she felt as though she was warm enough,
Speaker:Kinse stood up and launched into her usual business pitch.
Speaker:“Good day to you, Miss Wylia of Summervale Shore.
Speaker:Thank you for considering Kickbutt Kobold Parties L.L.C. for all your draconic party planning needs.
Speaker:I assure you that I have years of party planning to draw from
Speaker:to make your event as majestic as you are.
Speaker:I have some samples here in my pack that I encourage you to peruse at your leisure so that
Speaker:I can get a feel for what will give you the best experience.”
Speaker:And with that, Kinse lowered herself into a deep bow
Speaker:and waited for a response from Wylia.
Speaker:“As flattered as I am,
Speaker:please don’t bow for me.
Speaker:I’m nothing too special after all.
Speaker:But I am interested in what you have to show me. So, show me!”
Speaker:Kinse looked up to Wylia and scrambled over to her bag excitedly
Speaker:and began to pull things out.
Speaker:“Have you considered what occasion you want to try and celebrate Miss Wylia?
Speaker:That would help me to pick the decorations and invitations to use.”
Speaker:“Oh! I hadn’t even thought of that.
Speaker:I was just in the mood for a party!”
Speaker:Kinse had to stop searching through her bag to process what she had just heard.
Speaker:Why would Wylia have called for her services
Speaker:if she didn’t even know what kind of party she wanted?
Speaker:Usually her clients had at least a small idea of what the party was going to entail.
Speaker:“Is your hatchday close Miss Wylia?
Speaker:Perhaps you’d be interested in celebrating the day you were born?”
Speaker:Wylia snorted at that comment and said, “That sounds so self-serving!
Speaker:To think I am so important as to have an entire party dedicated to the day I hatched from an egg.”
Speaker:Kinse threw the balloons and festive party horns over her shoulder as she asked again.
Speaker:“What about your relatives?
Speaker:Maybe you want to celebrate a special occasion with
Speaker:them?” “I assure you that my family would rather forget that I was related to them, so I don’t think that will work either.”
Speaker:Kinse tossed the ceremonial cask of wine labeled
Speaker:‘break in case of in-laws’
Speaker:she carried with her out of her bag
Speaker:and dug as deep as she could.
Speaker:She brought out a huge beach ball and a small kit
Speaker:to put together a volleyball net.
Speaker:“How about a beach party then?
Speaker:You live in Summervale Shore after all
Speaker:and getting the chance to enjoy the fresh air and sparkling water must sound appealing?”
Speaker:“No offense Kinse, but I spend all day in the sparkling water.
Speaker:I don’t really feel like having a whole party centered around what I do everyday.”
Speaker:Kinse dug into her pack one last time,
Speaker:but found that she had finally reached the bottom.
Speaker:Tears began to well in her eyes as she realized she was close to losing her first customer in years.
Speaker:Wylia noticed that Kinse was distressed
Speaker:and offered a slimy hand to her.
Speaker:“Hey now, little one.
Speaker:What’s wrong?” “I’ve failed you, Miss Wylia.
Speaker:I don’t have anything that would be suitable for you.
Speaker:And if I’m being frank,
Speaker:you are much too unpredictable to even know where to begin to plan your party!”
Speaker:Wylia threw her head back and Kinse braced for the worst,
Speaker:but all that came out of Wylia was a hearty laugh.
Speaker:“Yeah, I get that a lot.
Speaker:Tell you what, I think I have an idea for a party after all.
Speaker:But it’s going to be a little unorthodox.
Speaker:Is that OK?” “Of course, Miss Wylia.
Speaker:I’m here to give you the perfect party after all.”
Speaker:“Splendid! Then I want you to tell me what kind of party you would want
Speaker:and we’ll set it up for you.”
Speaker:Kinse looked at the dragon dumbfounded.
Speaker:She hadn’t thought about her ideal party in years and years.
Speaker:And the last time she remembered celebrating something for herself was back when she was still losing baby fangs.
Speaker:It took her a long while of thinking about it
Speaker:before she settled on an answer that felt good.
Speaker:“I’d actually love to have a slumber party.
Speaker:I missed out on doing things like that with the other kobolds when I was younger.
Speaker:Was too busy planning other folks parties by
Speaker:then.” Wylia’s eyes lit up
Speaker:and she ran over to her hoard
Speaker:and pulled out a set of pajamas that were buried at the bottom
Speaker:and brought it over to Kinse.
Speaker:She then took the towels in the corner and folded them using her many legs into the approximate shape of beds for them to lay on.
Speaker:They propped themselves up next to the lava chute to get nice and cozy.
Speaker:Kinse broke the cask of wine
Speaker:and they roasted some fresh fish that paired surprisingly well.
Speaker:Wylia spoke up after dinner
Speaker:while picking her teeth with one of her many talons.
Speaker:“Well Kinse, I just have one more question for you and I think
Speaker:it’s the most important one of the night.”
Speaker:“Alright, let me hear it.”
Speaker:“Truth or Dare?” Kinse smiled the widest she had in a long time
Speaker:before confidently answering,”Dare!”
Speaker:This was “Unpredictability” by Nenekiri Bookwyrm,
Speaker:read for you by Khaki,
Speaker:your faithful fireside companion.
Speaker:Thank you for listening
Speaker:to The Voice of Dog